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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
I'm in desperate need of advice. I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for over a year now and I love him and he has been there for me and has helped me through my addiction. I'm a recovering heroin addict but my family hates my boyfriend because we got into a physical altercation once in front of my 8 yr old daughter and as a result my daughter now lives with her dad. My boyfriend has never used drugs and he wants me to move across the country with him to start my life over because I recently just started staying with my parents again to get clean. However my older sister is getting released from the hospital soon after getting an infection from drug use and my boyfriend and I are terrified of her being in the same environment as me because it may jepordize my recovery. I've always used with my sister and I'm not sure if she wants to change. I don't want to move away from my family and daughter but I'm scared if I don't I will fall right back into drugs and may never make it back out. What should I do?
A question about your daughter; who has legal, court ordered custody, of your daughter. The reason I asked is just because you had a "physical altercation once in front of my 8 yr. old daughter." This may not be a legal reason for the courts to take your daughter from you. Even if family services removed her they still need a court order for her to remain in her father’s custody. IF you want her back you could go to court and ask a judge to award custody to you.
The reason I asked this is if you do want custody of your daughter this could complicate you moving with your boy fiend as the court could also order you to stay so he has visitation. Conversely if you do move with your boyfriend, I will discuss this next, you can ask for visitation rights and have her sent to you for winter or spring and summer vacations.
As for moving with your boyfriend: Any addiction is a horrible thing. Being around another addict especially with someone you shared your addiction with is a step towards failure as you have pointed out. I support you moving with your boyfriend.
Once you reach you new home, if you are not already a member you should find a local AA meeting and join. AA is not just for alcoholics they have helped thousands of narcotic users recover as well. Below is link to the AA website from which you will be able to find a local meeting for NAA which are the meetings for those recovering from Narcotic addictions.
http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/find-aa-resources
My brother in-law is a 25 year recovering alcoholic and swears by AA. The 12 step program and their system of help works. Best of all it cost nothing or whatever you can afford to donate as they pass the hat at each meeting.
(Rating: 5) DSS actually did remove my daughter from my custody and granted her father custody until I complete some domestic violence classes which I have already started and can continue once I move. I believe once that is finished and my boyfriend completes the required classes they asked of him I will be allowed to file for joint custody and see my daughter over the summer and things like that. I'm just a little scared to put so much faith in one person and move away from my family because I worry if my boyfriend does something to hurt me then I will be stuck far away with no one to really turn to. I do not think he will I just have issues I suppose putting so much faith into one person because of fear I will be let down. I've just been praying all day everyday and I am sincerely hoping for the best.