about

:.Hey x3
My name is Emily and blah blah blah.


:.I have a lot of personal, family, and friend issues of my own so a lot of times, I can probably relate to you a lot of times if you have personal, family, and/or friend issues.


:.I can offer a lot of information, help, and advice on family and friend relationships, love lives, depression, stretching/flexibility, weight loss, violin, being organized, dog training, forensics (public speaking), keeping up with school/extracurricular activities, eating disorders, writing (stories and poems), and probably a lot of other random stuff like what to drink when you eat something spicy and why.


:.Although I can help a lot of you guys on the above subjects, I don't tend to take my own advice so it can become quite an awkward/ironic/contradicting situation for me or make myself sound like a complete and utter hypocrite.


:.Hannah Whitall Smith once said, "The true secret of giving advice is, after you have honestly given it, to be perfectly indifferent whether it is taken or not, and never persist in trying to set people right." I agree 100% of it. Advice is advice and it is given when asked for. I give it and I leave it at that. It's up to the questioner/advice seeker to take it.


:.That point leads onto my philosophies in advice giving:
1. Advice is given when asked and no time else, unless your friend is about to irritate a black bear, then you should definitely advice your friend to back away and run for his or her life.
2. Advice is not critical, not judgmental, and definitely not biased. Advice is advice and should remain neutral.
3. Advice is to help, not to get 5s on every answer. As a result, my advice ends up being quite blunt and frank with a hint of rambling mixed in.

If you have general questions on the topics I can be a lot of help in (as listed above), most likely, they will be in my FORUM

If it is not, you can inbox me to request me to put it up.

:.If you want to ask me a question directly...
a)if it is not urgent and can wait a week or so, inbox me.
b)if it is an urgent question such as "I'm being eaten by a shark! What do I do???" first of all, I'm quite amazed that you can type while being eaten and second of all, e-mail me at cancel.life@gmail.com. I will answer you by midnight of that day (or if it's 11:55PM, probably by 3PM the following day).

advice

14/F Sorry this might be a little long.

So there's this girl who's been at our school for awhile now maybe a month or two let's call her L... there's been two new girls after her, so she's not really the new girl anymore... So my friend, let's call her E, has been friends with her for awhile (L was at a school with a bunch of people from our school, so it's not like she doesn't know ANYONE), so she hangs out with us.

I kind of liked L at first, but now she's getting on my and my other friends nerves. She's sort of clingy to us, and she kind of doesn't shut up. She talks about weird things, like how she talks to ghosts and how much she loves her little brother and how much she loves bologna...etc.

Now, I'm not a mean person at all. I'm always really nice to her and I talk to her and stuff, but she seems to ignore me a lot, and she doesn't even know my name still. And no, I'm not exaggerating that, she really doesn't know my name, or any of my other friend's names (except for E). She's also really mean to my some of my guy friends, and two of my girl friends in particular. With my guy friends, she doesn't let them sit at our lunch table and yells at them and calls them creeps. With my 2 girls friends, she picks at their interests/disinterests and is always yelling at them and being a bitch to them

So yes, I know there's really nothing I can do about it. And yes, I also know I might sound like I'm being judgmental, but I'm trying really hard not to be. I always give people chances and I'm really nice to people, but she seems to be passing up every chance I give her, and she's mean to me, so that's not fair.

What I'm asking is, how am I supposed to tell E that no one is really warming up to her? I know E is allowed to be friends with whomever she wants, but I can never, EVER be around E alone or talk to her privately without L crowding around us. E is totally oblivious to her behavior. So I need help on what to do! Thank you so much!

L doesn't sound much like a social butterfly.
If she doesn't want to warm up to people, she doesn't have the right to judge people. And if she's constantly picking on your friends when she doesn't even know them and they have been nice to her, well, let's put it in simple terms: she has major issues. Yes, there are people who are complete oblivious b.tches to those around them unless they get to know a person really well and vice versa--then they might be nice. But sometimes you have to know when to put a break to hostility, right?

You friend E might just be as oblivious with what's happening, or she's just trying to be really nice to this girl.

Honestly, if it was me, I would say something like this to E, "I know you're really good friends with L and all, but she's being hostile to a lot of people around you as well as me. I don't want to sound mean or anything but that's the truth. You can be friends with whoever you want, it's your choice and right. However, since you're on good terms with her, would you please see why she's acting so hostile or at least get her to open up and be nicer to people around her? Honestly, I don't know if I can take much of her anymore and I don't want this to wedge in between us. We've been friends for (x)years and I love you, but she's getting on my nerves and I don't feel welcome around her, but she's always with you. I'm not trying to be nit picky or telling you to ditch her as a friend. Really, I'm not. I'm just asking if you can find out why she's so angry towards people or at least get her to be nice to us."

Good luck.


[view]


(Rating: 5) Thank you soo much that really helped :)

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>

eXTReMe Tracker