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"We make war so that we may live in peace." -aristotle"If you judge someone right away, you will not be able to learn to love them."
I'm Hayley, I'll try to help you as best I can. I'm 18, and a senior in high school. I like art, music, and clothing. I'm a vegetarian abd have been consistent with it for four years. I have two dogs a westie named misty and a Maltese/poodle mix named mally. I know a lot about dogs because any time
my dogs get a scratch, I research and call the vet haha.
advice
16F
Quick sidestory: told the guy i liked, we'll call him R, that I liked him a bit less than 2 and a half months ago, we were pretty good friends before that. He didn't respond, we didn't talk until 4 days later, we're still friends but things are still somewhat awkward and we're not the friends we used to be. He still never gave a clear response to it, we literally barely spoke about it, which isn't surprising because that's how he is.
So my friend, who we'll call N, is also a close friend of R's. We all have chemistry together, so I figured as long as N and I needed to study and get his help, I'd invite them over to my house so I could accomplish SOMETHING with him after all of this. So I told N about the idea and she said it was a good idea. So this past Friday, we were talking to him and I figured I'd ask him then. So I said "So N and I were thinking of studying for chem at my house on Tuesday (which is today) after US regents (chem regents are Wed) and we could probably use your help so yeah". So as I'm saying this, R has this weird smile on his face and is nervously laughing, which is really weird because he never is like that, he's always hard to read and isn't very expressive of how he feels. For example when I told him I liked him, no one would've known he was freaked out unless he told people about it, and he had told me that i kindof scared the crap out of him (that's actually the only response I got from him). So anyway, N & I said a couple of things after I asked him but then I was like "Okay so is it yes...is it no...is it maybe..." So he said "it's maybe". So I figured ok, Monday is the last day of full classes and the day before they'd possibly come over so I'll ask him for sure then. So Monday comes and in chem I talk to him and I said "so are you going to come over and help N & I tomorrow?" And he said "Uhh... am I supposed to?" So I said "No but I'd really appreciate if you did". So the bell rang and he didn't really respond so I figured I'd wait until after class when me, R & N walk together towards gym (I had gym with just R, but N still went the same way). So class ends and we're walking and I say to him "So, R, are you going to come tomorrow or not". So mumbled something and I was like "I can't understand you". So asked again and he was like "Do I have to?" and N was like "R's not into study parties haha". And so R's giving that weird smile again and we keep going back and forth, I'd keep asking him and he'd keep mumbling (basically he was trying to be funny and act like he was being annoying to cover up the fact that he was stalling). So N & I were like wow what is your issue can you answer the question already but we were still like laughing. So N had to go a separate way and I was walkng a little more with R on the way to locker rooms. So I was like "So. R. Is it a yes or no!" So he's still smiling weird and he looks nervous and slightly uncomfortable, and still not answering me, trying to be funny, whatever haha. So we went our separate ways for lockers. When I walked into the gym after he was there first sitting against the wall, so I sat next to him and gave him a look and he obliviously was like "what?" (he's quite oblivious). So I said is it a yes or no? He said "it's a no". So I asked why and he decides to say "Because I have better things to do" (now I'm not condoning what he said, but 1. he was referring that to both N and I and 2. That's something he would say, honestly I know him and by the influxion of it I highly doubt he meant to be hurtful by saying that, he's just kindof stupid that way). So for the rest of the period, me, him and my other friend, who we'll call T, were sitting and talking. Throughout the period, I was pissed that he was rude and that he wasn't coming, so I kept snapping at him throughout the period and I'm sure he noticed. Weirdly, he was still being nice to me and seemed to talk to me more, when usually in these past two and half months he tends to avoid talking to me or looking at me a lot (not that we didn't talk, but it was just a lot less then we did before I told him I liked him, and I could just tell he was more communicative with me then). So next period in math, which R and I also have together but we never got to talk there since our seats were kindof far, I texted N and told her what happened. After I told her to ask him what he said to me as if I didn't tell her, and see what he says and see if he'd change his mind. I'll get back to that soon. So last night, I was texting T and we were talking about what happened in gym. She said wow well he seemed really nice in gym (which he was). Also I talked to T this morning in person and she also mentioned that she also thought that it seemed like he ws trying to make me a little jealous with her in gym, it's hard to explain how so I won't get into it but it's possible she was right, but who knows if he was trying to be a jerk or not. I texted N this morning too and said "So I'm guessing he's still not going to come?" and she wrote "No sorry, he said that he was busy" and other stuff (at least that clarified that he's actually busy today, and he's not online which with him means he's probably not home). Basically, yesterday and the week before R was acting really weird, and I could tell a difference in him because he hasn't been like this at all before.
But anyway based on all of this info, why do you think he was acting this way? Why would he stall to give me an answer if he already knew he was busy and just could've easily said it? And also classes are over now and I really don't want to lose touch with him, and I know we will if I don't talk to him myself because he's not a big talker when he's not being talked to, but I'm always really scared to text guys I like because I never know what to say, so how could I allow myself to be more confident about talking to him this summer?
hmmm. this is hard to answer, he is a confusing person! i kind of think he was just stalling about not studying with you, because honestly, i don't think he wanted too so he was just trying to get around it. & probably was hoping you'd take the hint. i don't know why he was laughing though..maybe he was nervous. & maybe he was being so nice because he felt bad about being mean to you. & weren't you good friends with him before you told him you liked him? well just go back to acting that way, when you guys were friends. act like you never told him, & things will go back to normal eventually.
My dad is about 50.
recently (within the past 2-3 months) he's just been so pessimistic.
but.. it's something more than that. He's always getting onto my brother, he yells and gets angry pretty much once a day, if I'm around I get to be a target. It's getting worse and worse, his bouts of anger then sulking. I couldn't sleep and caught him up at like midnight and he seemed all sulky/angry then too.
I know he's had trouble sleeping, so yeah... It's so hard to explain. just that he's always getting angry, he does have a chronic disease so that is always on his mind too... I just.. I don't know anymore.
I'm not hurt directly by his comments, none of my family is, because we know it's not true. But, nothing kills a happy mood like having to hear a bunch of yelling.
He'll bitch about something just to do it. He'll find any little thing. It's more than just being a bastard. It's different. My mom says he's crazy, my brother says he's crazy, I say "Someone help me figure this out."
He wasn't always like this, and he's NOT always like this. But it's getting closer and closer to it being that way. I've noticed something just different about the way he looks recently, not bad, or good, but... different..
Just the other day he said, "Everything from the government killing my freedom, the rain killing my crops, and me.. killing myself." (he was referring to smoking, etc. but it's still worrisome.)
I just don't know.
Sorry for it being so long, but I can't explain it right.
help?
That's nice that you are so worried about your father. If I were you, I would just say, "Dad, I'm really worried, you seem really sad & angry a lot lately, and its really upsetting me because I don't like to see you angry and hurt all the time. Can I do something to help you? I love you & want to do anything I can to make it better." .. I would say something like that, he also just turned 50 right? well a lot of old people hate that 50 year mark. my mom is turning 50 next year, and i'm dreading that day more then anything. when my dad turned 50 this year, she was crying. so hahah maybe hes upset about that too? just ask him, i'm sure he'll be really touched that you care so much.
So my bestfriend was dating this guy, who had it really bad for her, they had only been official for a little over 2 weeks, but they had been spending alot of time together & he really liked her. Well one day, she decides she likes her guy bestfriend,(her ex boyfriend who took her virginitys brother) her & her "bestfriend" wanted to keep it all under wraps so her ex wouldn't find out, so they decided they wouldnt go out, they would just do physical stuff without being together, & she only told me & another girl.
Well at first she was just going to cheat on her boyfriend, but then she decided to break up with him. She told him that it was because she was grounded for the rest of the summer & wouldn't be able to see him. He knew it was a lie & he kept texting me & begging me to tell him the real reason, & he swore on his fathers grave he wouldnt say anything. I finally just said "Okay, shes gotta thing for her bestfriend, but their not going to go out, she just felt bad about it & didn't want to hurt you." Well they ended up getting in a fight, & at first i kept denying it was me who told. When she finally figured it out, i admitted to it & we got into an arguement. I eventually apologized for telling him, but now shes going around & posting things on myspace about how she cant trust anyone & shes only got herself.
Is it just me or is she blowing this a little out of proportion? & did i do the right thing by telling him?
I kind of understand what your friend is going through. I mean yeah, that boy did have a right to know, but you also didn't have a right to tell him either. It wasn't your relationship. I understand how your friend feels, because I have gone through something somewhat similar. It's not so much that you told him, but it's that she trusted you with something, and i'm sure you probably promised not to say anything, and you did anyway. i was so hurt when my friend did that to me. & then after that you denied it. that only made it ten times worse. (atleast when it happened to me, i thought it made it even worse) because you were lying to her face too. i'm not sure if she should really go be posting things around on myspace about how shes so upset, that's kind of ridiculous.. but she is obviously really upset. If I were you I would apologize constantly, just tell her how sorry you are, and you don't blame her for being mad, & you know.
It really sucks when a good friend of yours lies to you, it really messes with the friendship, & its really hard to overlook it.
good luck, hope you guys work it out. :)
15/f
this is a VERY long story, but im gonna try to lay this out as short as possible and please, im desperate here, you have NO clue what i've been through these past few months, and i need all the help i can get..
last year i met a REALLY sensative guy. he was 16, about to be 17, and i was 14.. he was soooo shy, hes VERY insecure. when we first started dating, all he said to me was how i saved him and pulled him out of his misery because he has had no luck with relationships and was treated like shit by girls his whole life. hes not even that cute and popular, and i have a waaay higher social status in my grade/ school then he does in his grade.. but ive been known to have wierd taste and i can look beyond looks and things like that very easily. i think when we first started dating him i was just excited over the fact that he had a car and he was a junior and i was only a freshmen.. but i actually did end up falling in love with him. and he was COMPLETELY in love with me. we lost our virginities to eachother and ill tell you, im smart, and not at all a bit naiive.. i knew this kid loved me. & we did NOT have a sex based relationship whatsoever.. we became eachothers best friends. both of us lost all of our other friends because we were only with eachother 24-7. he called my mom 'mom' and i did the same with his mom.. we were incredibly close.. and sense he was older, i felt so comftorbal and secure with him, and i went to him with all my problems, and he would help me.. ive been suffering from depression for years and me and my mother never had a good relationship, and my father left me, and i was molested as a baby.. but when i was with him, he made me feel so comftorbal. we told eachother EVERYTHING. and i was postive he was there to stay. he promised me forever every single day. we dated for a year. i messed it up, biggest mistake of my entire life.. he started getting very annoying and up my ass. you know when youre in a bad mood and you just want to be left alone? well he would never leave me alone. he'd be like 'its okay babe i love you' bla bla. all mushy, when i just want to be mad!. i tried talking to him about this many times and all he could say was im sorry i just love you soooo much i cant help it.. all my friends called him whipped cream and everything.. it was BAD. but anyways, one night i was out with my friends the day before a cheer competition, and my ex was there.. and somewhere along the lines, we kissed.. my boyfriends friend was there and told him that if i didnt tell him, he was going to.. i knew he wasnt going to break up with me or anything.. so i told him.. but the thing is.. i think i was looking for a fight with him because our relationship was so boring. when i told him, it pissed me off how he was crying instead of being mad, yelling at me. so i started saying things to make him mad.. i said TERRIBLE things. like i was gonna keep cheating on him because he basically lets me, and how i know i take advantage of him because he trusts me so much but i shouldnt.. and he was like well maybe i have to break up with you then.. and he was like i really dont want to. and i was like fine just do it idont care! yelling at him and stuff.. and then he did. i was thinking we would get back together in a couple weeks.. so after we broke up, we still talked because we obv. still loved eachother and everything. we acted like we were going out, and we even 'hooked up' a few times.. but when he asked me back out, i kept saying no, i wasnt ready.. because the relationship was SOOO akward after we broke up.. he was acting so different. and i knew why. it was because i broke his heart. and i did, bad. so one day after we hooked up, my friend told me that her brother saw my 'boyfriend, x-boyfriend, whatever u wanna call him' at a store.. and he was saying how he was done with me and he was trying to get with this new girl 'leesh'.. i was FURIOUS. i called him up screaming at him asking for all my stuff back and it was over for good and everything. but really, i wanted an appology from him, not my stuff back. btw, i was very remorsful for cheating on him and saying what i said to him, i mustve appologized a million times.. but he didnt say anything, he justgave me all my stuff back and acted like it was nothing.. and then i kept trying to get him back, but he kept rejecting me. i was litterally down on my knees for this kid. until one day i found out he had a girlfriend. not just some girl.. the girl who dates ALL the boys that i date after me.. but thats a whole nother story.. anyways, i was devistated. i couldnt eat, i couldnt talk, i couldnt sleep, i couldnt go to school,, nothing. all i did was cry and cry and cry and cry. i tried talking to him seeing if we could be friends and stuff, but he hates me now. if i send him one text, he shuts his phone off. he goes all different ways in the halls so i dont have to see him in school, he wont even look my way. he saw me practically drown in my own tears and he didnt even care. i wrote him long long letters, i tried everything i could just to be able to talk to him when i need to, so i wouldnt be so hurt about the situation.. now, i have two weeks left of school and im failing 4 classes.. and im an honors student. i DONT fail. its not me. and im grounded because of it, so i cant even go out and try to forget it. its been sense thhe end of february... and still,all i can think about is killing myself.. people say they are heart broken.. but this gives heart broken a new definition. there is litterally a hole in my chest. and i keep getting maaaassive anxiety attacks in class, and i do go to counceling wich is sort of helpful but we mostly talk about my parents.. three days ago, she broke up with him. and he was very upset from what i heard.. he hasnt tried talking to me or anything but i dont know what to do, i want to talk to him but he'll just ignore me.. i love this kid and care about him with my life. today i thought i was going to DIE. it was the last day of school for the seniors. the last time ill EVER see him again. the last time ill ever get to look for him i the halls so i can walk by him.. that was the only time i ever got to see him, and today was my last day. and when i walked by him for the very last time of my life today, he didnt even look at me. it was so painful. he couldnt even have the heart to say bye to me considering im his first love and helll never see me again. i havent been able to stop crying sense i last saw him. i dont even know what to do with my life any more. someone PLEEEEEASE tell me what to do to get him back. ANNYTHING. I AM DESPERATE FOR HELP. we had such a good relationship till i cheated and we Never ever had one fight. but you dont even understand. this kid wouldnt even look at any other girls, deleted all the girls in his phone book, couldnt go an hour without texting me just saying he loved me, couldnt go a day withouth seeing me, brought me flowers randomly, did EVERYTHING for me. how can you love someone so much and go through everything we've been through together, and then just completely shut them out of your life?
First of all, you are 15 years old. You will have many many many many more boyfriends. You need to realize its over. When you act shallow like that & think you can just push people around & say mean things, you cannot expect him to want to stick around. If a guy cheated on me, that would be the end. But, he wasn't even going to break up with you for that. If you didn't like him anymore, all you had to do was tell him that. He probably thinks your psycho. (no offense) but why did you act like that? have some dignity. Obviously, he didn't feel as strongly about you as you thought he did. It seems like you are the one who is obsessed with him. Move on, your 15 years old, start acting like it.
What are some really good vegetarian dishes or recipes from your own recipe box or experiences?
get munchie madness! (i'm not sure if munchie is spelled like that or munchy. sorry, i forget) anyway, it has all like vegetarian and vegan recipes. i'm not sure how old you are, but they have a lot of like teenish recipes. they should have it at your library or borders :) its like really easy snack food to make, and it has some amazing stuff.
random question. do guys like girls to have fake nails because they look pretty? or do they prefer them not to because it makes them seem high maintenance?
guys answers would be appreciated. thanks!
I have guy friends that don't even know I have fake nails, they don't even know the difference. If they don't look incredibly fake, I don't think they even realize it. No boy has ever told me or my friends it makes them look high maintenance.
So basically, I've got 2 days to get tanner legs (never mind why). BUT my city isn't getting much sun for another week, so there goes that. And I'm not allowed to buy any fake tan spray or anything (and I wouldn't use it more than this one time, anyway). It wouldn't be so bad if my legs were pale like, an even white. But they're more like, a color you can tell is SUPPOSED to be like a beige color, but is just a sickly pale, uneven light yellowish/beigish color. The fact that I'm really clumsy and have bruises all over my legs, as well as darker (and slightly pinkish) knees only emphasizes this. ANYWAY, I know there are natural home-remedy-type ways to LIGHTEN skin (like using milk, lemon, things like that), so I'm wondering, any similar ways by which to TAN skin a little bit, WITHOUT sun or products?
Go to a tanning bed. Get tanning lotion and go to a tanning bed and you should get pretty tan. Home remedy stuff isn't a good idea usually, because stuff in stores hardly ever works, so something you make yourself probably won't either. :)
So my friend is considered a so called "slut" just because she had sex with her boyfriend, i dont care if she did or not. But everyone is telling me she's not innocent. Am i just not looking correctly?? By the way im only 13 n a half and so is my friend.
Shes not really a slut, but on the path.. you are 13 years old and probably don't even know much about anything. (no offense, but you really don't.) You're very young, and that isn't something you should do when your 13. When I was 13 I thought kissing boys was a huge deal. Sex is when you and someone else love eachother so much, you want to become one person, and make another person. At thirteen, you probably don't really know what love is. Is she planning on doing this again? Has she ever gotten her period before? Is she being safe? How old is the boy she did it with? These are questions you need to think about. Urge your friend to be safe and learn about teen pregnancy, stds, and things like that.
I have this group of friends that dont go to my school that i love to hang out with. yesterday we all went to the park and got pretty drunk. I ended up making out with this guy for ages. He supposedly had forced this girl to have sex with him quite a while ago and that girl was really angry at me. Now shes still really angry at me for making out with him. Everyone wants to go out in a couple of days and i dont know wheter to go or not because that girl has turned a few people agaisnt me.I really like that group of people and i think this girl is blowing the whole situation out of proportion , when really its nothing. she wasnt dating this guy, infact she hates him because he 'forced' her into sex. I really dont now wheter to go out with them or to just leave that group behind ?!? help. :(
I don't really understand why you would even want to touch a guy who is a rapist. I don't really think she hates you because you made out with him or anything, she is probably mad because you know what he did to her, and you would still make out with him. I think she is just mad that you were so stupid. Just stay away from that creep and she'll get over it eventually. I don't think I would go with them to whatever, but next time I would, if it seems to blow over a little.
I have this friend. Well, we USED to be best friends. However, throughout a couple years, I've kind of matured a bit and learned a lot and what not. She hasn't. So we're growing apart. The thing is, she is and always has been copying me. When we first met, she made friends with all of my friends. She got her hair dyed and cut to match mine, she was interested in all the guys I was, she called us "twins" all the time, and she basically did ALL the same stuff as me ALL the time. Yeah, yeah I know it's supposed to be the highest form of flattery, but to me, it's the highest form of annoyance. I don't know why I put up with it for as long as I have. Well, over Christmas I got a brand new phone which I had been waiting FOREVER for. It was so cool because it was SUPER expensive so no one around where I live had it. Then I came in to school today and she has the EXACT same phone as me. Same model, same color! This seriously struck something in me. It's like she's trying to be me and it's majorly creepy and disturbing. I know we're growing apart, but I don't want her to take MY unique qualities that she adapted to with her. They aren't her, they're me :( I just don't know...how do I get her to stop? And possibly completely distance myself from her? I just don't have time to worry about silly friend issues when I've got my school work and family issues to deal with :( thanks
I kind of think your blowing this out of proportion. How old are you? Are you in middle school? or like a freshman in high school or something? It's not her fault you have good taste in things. You wouldn't copy someone because you want to be just like them, you copy them because you like what they have, at least that's how I look at it. If she is your best friend (or was) doesn't that mean that the two of you have a lot of similar interests? So, of course she would like the same things you do..
If it really bothers you that much.. just be like "oh wow you have like everything i do, its so weird" and kinda laugh so it doesn't seem mean or anything. She'll probably take the hint..
I also don't get why this is something you would even worry about anyway. If you have all this school work and family things to worry about..why is this even coming into your mind? You're honestly making a way bigger deal about this then necessary, let it go. If that is the only reason why you don't like this girl because she steals your 'uniqueness' then that is a really lame reason to throw away a friendship..
Also, I mean do you wear really in style clothing and stuff? Because that is kind of like copying whats in style right now, and everything when you think about it. I'm sure everything you have and do isn't all your own ideas, you probably got it from somewhere too, whether its a magazine or from someone in school or something. She just happens to like everything you have.
I forgot to add something else, why I was asking about your age, if your in middle school or like even high school, she is probably just going through a identity crisis. It takes some people longer to figure out who they are, and their exact interests and everything.
HELP!
OK so in French class last week I got a detention! I've never had a detention in my entire life! My teacher assigned it to me for this Wednesday! And the most annoying part is that the reason I got detention was because I missed three homeworks. THREE! And not even in a row, either! Over a period of time!! So now my BITCH of a teacher gave me detention (Just to say, she gives them out like candy. She gave one of my best friends an afterschool detention because she was chewing gum). So I don't know what to tell my parents. I know they're going to be really mad at me. Once I got a D and a C on my PROGRESS report (for those who don't know, it's like a report card in the middle of the quarter. It's just to check up on grades), and my dad threw a tantrum and took my phone away and grounded me for a week. My mom probably won't be as mad, but still. And I really don't want to lie because they'll get even more mad at me.
Ok I know I sound like a goody-goody and whatever, but I'm really not, it's just I've never had a detention, and I'm just afraid of my parent's reaction.
Please help!! Thank you so much!
I don't think your parents will be that mad? What's your grade in the class? Make up the homework assignments and maybe she'll take them. Ask her what your grade is. Ask her for a progress report, if you show her you care, she will have some respect for you.
If your doing well, show your mom and dad the progress report. Just be like, "I got a detention for missing three homework assignments awhile back, but I made them up, and this is my grade right now, she gives detentions to a lot of people, sorry."
It's not like you beat someone up, so ehhh don't worry about it.
I’m 16/f and I have this best friend Katie. (not her real name; she’s also 16) We became best friends in grammar school. We went to a small, private elementary school. There was another boy in our class, Ben. Katie and Ben never got along really well, but after 5th grade, they ended up going to a public middle school together, ended their feud and became friends (I was at a different school). She developed an intense crush on Ben and she firmly believed he was interested in her too. She made subtle advances but they never amounted to anything. Her friendship with him soon died after he became popular (in the time that I knew him, he was a friendless geek) and after he discovered that she liked him, but she apparently didn’t get the message that he didn’t really like her back.
However, I remember having talked to Jason, a friend of Ben’s, who went to our old school together. Jason told me that Ben told him that Katie was chasing after him, and that Ben really wasn’t interested in her. Knowing Katie, her idea of how other people think are skewed. She was confident that Ben liked her, but she probably picked up signals from him that weren’t really there.
They ended up going to the same high school together. He lost his popularity and became a nerdy loner again. Katie started going out with this other guy, Danny. She thought she was totally in love with him and all that, and lost her virginity to him a few months ago. Recently, Ben got transferred to a new school and Katie is really depressed. She’s always liked Ben and she only got together with Danny to get over him, but it didn’t really work.
Katie is really sad and upset and she wants to talk about it with me, but I really don’t know what to tell her. I’m torn between whether I should break it to her about what Jason told me awhile back, that Ben was never really interested in her. I’m afraid that it would be really bitchy and mean and coldhearted for me to tell her that, but at the same time I don’t think it’s really good that she have this deluded idea of Ben having liked her, when he really didn’t. It’s just that I’ve never been in any sort of situation like this before and I don’t know what advice to give her.
Don't tell her. He is gone now. Time heals all wounds. She'll get over him eventually. It may take awhile, but she will, and there is really no point in telling her. It will probably make it worse if you do actually. Just help her move on.
I AM REALLY WORRIED ABOUT MY BF. TO START OF WITH he is 11 and i am 16 and WE STARTING GOING OUT LAST AUGUST TILL EARLY THIS MONTH WHEN HE DUMPED ME AND A WEEK LATER HE TOLD ME HE DIDNT WANT TO DUMP ME HIS BRAIN TOLD HIM TO AND HE STILL LOVED ME AND WE TALKED AND GOT BACK TOGETHER AND HE TOLD ME HE HAS ADHD AND IED. Then now he keeps saying he hears voices telling him to join them in hell and how he hates his life and wants to kill himself and he worried me the other night cause we were talking and then he changed and started saying stuff like i hear the bells ringing hahaha bye im goin to kill myself and he went and i was worried and i even had to phone his sister to see if he was alright as he switched his phone off and she said he was unhappy. then last nite it happened again me, him and his mate were talking and he changed and started saying stuff and then didnt rember and then he went he was coughinh up blood and his mom was talking with him and he went off and i am so worried about him cause i love him so much and i dont know what to do i just wanna be with him and help him but i dont know how........
I'm confused. Is this joke? Are you really 16? Is he really 11? Is that a typo? I'm going to answer this like it wasn't a typo. Even though I really hope it is..
First of all, if you two are really 5 years apart, that is crazy and messed up. He is a little boy, for starters. That is a hugee gap in age. Whether you say he is mature for his age or not, there is no way he is as mature as a 16 year old.
Anyway, besides the coughing up blood thing, if you didn't see that happen, I don't really think that's true, he would be really sick, and need to go to the hospital. (I'm assuming, I'm not a doctor.. but I'm just guessing that is a pretty big deal.) Anyway, if he really is 11, he is a little kid, and he is making up lies, a lot of younger kids do it. My brother tells people that he hit his head and had to be in the hospital for 5 days and almost died. (that never happened)
So yeahh.
However, he could be mentally ill too, and if your that concerned, tell his parents/guardians.
I'm guessing there was a huge typo in this, because you don't sound like a 16 year old at all. I'm guessing you are like.. 13? and he is 11? That makes better sense..
Just tell your parents or his.. they'll know how to take care of it, kiddo.
15/f.
I guess this isn't really a question, but to see if anyone has gone through what I am going through now.
You see I seem to be getting more and more depressed lately.
I just feel so alone. I have friends, but I don't have like a super close friend who is always there for me. I don't have a boyfriend. The guy that I have liked since seventh grade is now practically dating this amazingly pretty girl who seems to have everything. It just hurts so bad because for some reason I thought that he had feelings for me. It makes me feel like I am not good enough, or pretty enough.
I don't think people know what I am going through. I live in a nice home, my parents have good jobs, and I get good grades.
People don't understand that every night I turn up my music (so my family won't here me) and just cry.
I don't know if I should talk to my mom about going to counseling. But, you see, I've went to counseling before when I was younger because I was sexually harassed, and I know that if I talk to my mom about counseling she will think that its about that and really isn't.
Anyway... I am kind of babbling on... so I'll end it here. Any input would be great.
I swear middle school is the worst years everrrrrrrrr. Anyway, yeah I remember being like that too. I can't even remember why I was so sad. I was just so insecure with myself, and any little thing would just make me so upset. I was really depressed, and I remember feeling just like you do. I never ever told anyone, and I can't believe I'm even typing this out now. I don't know when it exactly happened, somewhere around 9th grade, I was just like, I don't care what anyone thinks of me, I am who I am, and I'm just going to do things my way. I misbehaved alottt when I was in middle school, and I cannot believe the person I am. I'm in high school and I don't think I could be a more smarter confident person.
Don't bottle it up inside, it only makes it worse, I remember that. I was so scared to tell anyone, because I didn't want to get made fun of, or be embarrassed by it. But I'm sure your family loves you, and wants to help you. Even just talk to a friend, or write in a journal how you feel. If you have any part of you that ever wants to kill yourself, or if you've tried, tell your mom!!!!!!!!!!! or someone else you trust. Your family loves you and cares about you, just remember that.
I've made a big mistake. I feel my heart hurt as hell. I want to fix it but I don't know how?.
My A(sister) and her b (boyfriend)
Broke up on tuesday.
Me and B are really good friends, I always hang out at his place (he lives alone) and drink etc..
B's bestfriend Y, is also my bestfriend (he is a male).
On wednesday B called me and told me to come over (it's okay he always does) and told me that Y is coming and 3 other of our friends and they are bringing Tequila.
So I went and I was very drunk, me and B were in the room, and I was telling him he should go back to A, THEN HE KISSED ME
He kissed me and said he liked me, we made out really hard(including blowjobs and almost fucking)
I don't remember anything, but that all our friends left but Y was sleeping in the room and we were making out HARD again on the couch, then I don't remember exactly but that I woke up and I was naked (no pants or underwear) and there was a blanket on me on the couch.
So I put my underwear on and pants, and went to Bs room and found him asleep but Y wasn't at home.
On thursday Y was traveling,(he was going to travel after the party on a holiday) we're at a party and he told me when i'm extremely drunk i'm going to call because there is something i have to tell you.
When he was drunk, he told me "I know that you and B made out, _____ I love you, and I told B that yesterday and he was so surprised because he made out with you, and I was shocked you would do something like that, how could you make out with your A's ex after one day, and I couldn't sleep so when i was leaving i found you naked on the couch, then put the blanket on you" and he kept telling me stufff
I was shocked, i thought B put the blanket on me. I'm so embaressed and i don't know what to do.
I messed up BIG TIME.
I don't know how to fix it and I've hurt alot of people because of my stupidness. Please help me, i don't have anyone to ask and when i asked my bestfriend (she isnt in town, she left) , she told me
"fuck you its B (A's longest relationship... someone she loved!)
sarah that was low
really low
lower than A would ever go or even THINK about going
i cant help you
the only thing you can do now is to grow up ya ______(and im saying this because i love you and i dont what to see you get pregnant or end up being an alcoholic)
you need to start thinking seriously about shit take a look at what your becoming ya ______
i mean first with ahmad(a guy in a party) which was bad but i let it go then with sharaf(ma ex) i couldnt believe what you did but i didnt say shit because i thought maybe this would make you start watching what your doing but no after that came shady(another dude)... sure it was funny but seriously remember when we used to criticize carina(a girl used to make out with shady)? well your waaaaay worse and now B!
i swear to god _____ im starting to think you should go and live with your dad for real
sure he was an asshole but he's better than winding up on the streets with nothing
and believe me _____ this is only gonna get worse when you go to australia...
i know you want me to pat you on the back and say its gonna be alright but the way your behaving its NOT
you seriously need to stop drinking stop screwing around and ACT LIKE A 14 YEAR OLD instead of some middle aged drunken whore
i swear to god _____ if i were there i would slap and beat some sense into you
i know no one gives a rats ass that ur ruining ur life including your mom (i love that woman but enough is enough) but I DO!
you need to start sobering up and stop drinking ALL TOGETHER!
which means no drinking at all not even an ID
its not impossible ya _____ people who r worse off than you did it
thats only the tip of the iceberg
but if you cant do that then im tough luck _____ your probably gonna end up dead before your 18"
Please anyone help me to fix it.
holy fuck. are you only 14? how old is B or whatever? He must be a lot older then you if he bought the tequila i'm assuming.
i don't know if you're aware of this.. but I don't think any of those guys liked you, they were just using you. it's really sad you got taken advantage like that.
i agree with everything your friend says.
You need to shape up. definitely if your only 14.. that's not good at all. The best way you can fix this is to never do this kind of thing again, and apologize to your sister and do whatever it takes for her to forgive you.. and stay away from her ex boyfriend, and the friend. they should not be partying with a little 14 year old girl..
i really hope you learn from your mistakes. :/
When ever I get into trouble, "talked to", or some embarrassing happens like a guy turning my down- I replay that bad moment in my head for days. I get really upset when I can't get the memory out of my head and then I feel very vulnerable for the next few days. I don't know why, most of the time the moment wasn't that big of a deal in the first place.
How do I just calm down and move my mind away from replaying bad memories constantly on repeat? :(
I get like that too.. but not as long. It's like a few minutes now. But, when I was younger, in 7th and 8th grade, it would bother me for days. I was so insecure. (not saying your insecure) I don't know what came over me but one day I just got this I don't care attitude. (in a good kind of way) If i found out a guy I liked had a girlfriend or something.. I'd be really upset about it for literally 5 minutes, and then I just say to myself "why am i acting like this, who care, their loss." Honestly, I think the only way you can improve this problem, is to try to become really confident and comfortable with yourself. Just know who you are, and how great you are.
Okay... I love my friend... Matt and I told him and he said he likes me ONLY as a friend. So...the other day I told him that i was going to start to get over him. He told me " It sounded good". So... the day after (That was yesterday..Friday) We had a dance he was there and so was I . He was with a group of friends...but he only hanged with his best friend Drew. I was with my friends there was a big group of us. We were having SUCH a great time!! I was like drunk on mountain Dew...lol and my friend and I were running down the hallway (Matt was behind us). I slipped (because we were only in socks .. we can't wear shoes) I fell on my ass..lol once I got up and went into the dance with my friends laughing. My friend told me that when I fell Matt stopped... and whatched ...and than when I got up and left he left. So, that made me feel happy...does that mean he cared? He didn't laugh!! Okay... when I was dancing and having fun with my friends...it was so weird ... he looked so sad...and mad. Like, he looked at me when I was dancing ..and looked away with a pissed look on his face. Like, there was this one moment...when my friends left me in the middle of the dance floor... I saw matt...and he started walking towards me ...than my friends came back...and he sat back down. Do, u think he wanted to dance with me?? Also...he looked so sad...his friend I saw put his arm around him...to comfort him. Why , would he be upset?? Would he be upset because I am not upset? Well...I wasn't upset at the dance ...but I am still upset about him not likeing me back. I still love him. Can anyone tell me why he was acting this way? Like...maybe a a guy should answer this question. No, offense girls... you can answer 2 it's just maybe guys can help more with this because there dudes and they can help with Matt's wierd body language.
Thanks so much for anyone who answers!
I'm a girl sorry, but I've been through stuff like this, and I think I get it.
Honestly. I don't think he was jealous or anything like that. If he liked you, he would have told you the other day. Maybe he wasn't hanging out with you or whatever, because he thought you might feel awkward about him not liking you. He could have also been just having a bad day. Did you talk to him there and stuff? How did you act towards him? Maybe he thought you were mad at him or something..
their are alot of different things it could be.
but i really don't think it was because he was jealous.
sorry.. :/
Okay,this could get a little confusing so il explain it as best i can.
basicly im a 16 year old girl and my family has always been into playing darts..and its pretty big theres like tournaments on all the time and my sister plays and is always travelling places with it.
i never showed much interest before but i recently starting getting into it and going to the tournaments i knew practicly everyone that plays and is involved because i used to go when i was younger and my best friend david plays too.
anyway there was a tournament on a while back in this hotel and after it everyone always drinks so i had a few not that many but basicly i ended up making out with one of the guys shane. (just kissing) that was fine and a few weeks later there was a really important tournament that was like a weekend long thing my cousin came with me because she really likes my friend david..she ended up getting with him and i got with shane again and we stayed a while in their room (again all we did was kiss)now on to where it gets complicated you see shane lives in a seperate county to me so nothing could ever really happen.
anyway a few weeks after this it was my friend davids fathers birthday. so all the darts crowd were comming shane wasnt though. but one of the other guys dean was there ive known him ages too and i secretly liked him for a while but basicly i ended up kissing him but it was really short and i regretted it hugely the next day because i thought people were gonna start thinking i was a slut or something! i sowre then that i wasnt going to get with anyone else from the darts because i didnt want to make a name for myself.
but last week there was another tournament on where shane and dean were both there i thought it would be awkward but luckily it was ok. after the tournament there was like over 20 of us in the lobby of the hotel just talking and stuff and i was having a laugh with this guy warren then he asked me was i with shane and did i like him and stuff and i said yea and he said do you want me to ask him if he will get you again and i got all embarrased and said no dont then i went outside for some air and he followed me and we were talking and he started saying how shane said it was bothering him that he was 18 and that i was just 16 or something like that. while we were talking though i could tell warren was coming onto me and i really didnt want to get with him because i knew people would defenately talk about me then put he kept pressuring me telling me he really liked me and that he wouldnt tell anyone we were together and i was really reluctant and told him im not that easy and people would know and talk..but eventually i gave in and i seriously regretted it.
i found out then that shane hadnt said anything like that to him so he was probably just using it so that he could get with me which really upset me.
so basicly now ive kissed 3 different guys from the darts and im worried people are gonna think im some sort of easy whore who will kiss anybody and who only goes for the guys but im interested in the sport and im going to start playing soon! im honestly not that type of girl all i did was kiss each of them and im still a virgin too..its just im worried about making a name for myself and now im having second thoughts about going to anymore tournaments because im afraid of what people will say i know people will like say things to me over it and i can take that but sometimes people go to far and it gets to me!?
anyone have any advice on what i should do? my sister said not to mind anyone who says anything that what i did wasnt bad but to not get with anyone else again (not that i was planning to) i still cant help feeling cheap and easy though!
ha aw no your fine. i have friends that date like 23 year old guys and do so much with them, and i'm your age. but their a little over the top.. but still. those are whores. you're not.
I agree with what your sister said completely. I mean yes, you probably shouldn't of made out with all those guys, and that isn't the best thing you could have done, but you realize you made a mistake, and it's really not that big of a deal.
if anyone says anything to you, just ignore them. just move on from the whole thing..
129 f, 17.
I'm currently a size 6 in pants size, and I want to be a size 4 by the end of April. Maybe 5-10 pounds would be enough to lose 1-2 sizes? (since some stores pant sizes are in even numbers).
I plan on exercising 5 days a week to achieve this. And to cut out junk food... and bacon.
Is my goal realistic/possible?
Thanks.
Yes it definitely is, you should be able to lose that weight in no time. :)
Well I'm really skinny and I only eat healthy foods (with candy occasionally) but I've been gaining the pounds recently and it's showing, only through my stomach. I mean, I wouldn't really mind if my whole body got a bit bigger but it's just pushing through my stomach and since I'm skinny, it just looks as if I'm pregnant! (Well not that much but if this keeps up, in the future it will!)
For two years now I've wanted to have a treadmill or an elliptical machine in our house but my dad refuses to buy one so when I decided that when I turn 16, I'll go get a job and hopefully get a gym membership at this popular gym place that a lot of people in my grade go to. Do you think that's a good idea?
Oh! And it's like an additional...$180(?) for a personal trainer, do you think I should get one? Because I know that you can't just target a certain area, you got to do everything and I wouldn't know, I'd just use the treadmill and the elliptical machines every time. And I can't lift weights either (I can barely lift my back pack!).
And other info you can squeeze would be very nice, thank you! =]
Well.. if your already skinny I don't think you need to be that drastic! You really just need to do some sit ups and pull ups, and your stomach should shrink. Are you eating foods high in sodium/salt lately? That kind of food makes you bloated.. how long have you been like that? Has this just happened recently? Have you gotten your period yet? Ask yourself these questions, it could just be something like that..
You don't really need a treadmill or elliptical machine to get fit and healthy. I have a treadmill and like a whole gym in my house, and I hardly ever use it. To me at least, tread mills get sooooo boring. Just staring at the wall or tv or something. Do you live in a neighborhood? Instead of taking your car or something to get to your friends house.. walk there, or ride your bike. that's a really easy way to be active.
I'm 16, almost 17, and I don't have a job (nor do i plan on getting one) If I did have a job though.. there would be no way I'd waste my money on gym membership or a personal trainer. Do you have a job yet? I don't know if you realize this, but minimum wage is like what 6.50? You can also only work so many hours because of school. They only let you work like weekends or 3 days a week or something.. (at least everywhere I know of, and that's how it is where I live.) So, it would take you awhile to get that much money.. I'd be buying like new purses and clothes hahah.
You can target certain areas by pull ups and sit ups. I think i mentioned that though.. also, do you like to dance? their is other ways of losing weight, you don't need fancy machines. :)
i hope i helped. :D
Write me if you have any further questions!