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I've been talking to this one guy named Andy for a few weeks. And he really likes me and I just don't really want a boyfriend right now and he knows that. I mean I really like him and all. But then lastnight I went with my friend to a party at her church and I met this guy named Justin...and we like clicked. I mean we started talking at like 2 and didn't stop until like 5. I really like him now...like when I was with him I was getting those little butterfly feelings and I just felt all happy and stuff. And I realized...I don't feel that way around Andy. I mean I'm not going to go out with Justin right now b/c I don't know him very well....but what do I do about Andy? thanks...

- Zero

Keep talking to andy also, just because you like justin more doesnt mean you cant talk and hang out with andy too. Even if you and justin do have a relationship in the future, you can still talk and hang out with andy. Theres no rule saying you cant talk to someone just because you like someone more.
Hope i helped?
-melissa

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There's alot of things my boyfriend doesn't know about me, like I have a Psychiatrist and I was abused and stuff. I keep it close between me and my friends because I know I can trust them. I very much trust my boyfriend, but I don't just want to tell him straight up like when we're hanging out or something. I think it's only right if he asks me personal questions and then me respond. Does that seem right? Or should I tell him straight up?

Well, if you feel that you want to tell him..you could bring up a serious convo..ask him to tell you about his past..when hes done then you talk about yours. But you dont have to tell him if you dont want..it all depends on how you want to handle it. Or if you ever talk about family..etc you could bring it up.
-melissa

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I am 6 years out of high school and I am still with my high school boyfriend. We are not married but have a child together. He has never cheated on me or anything, but now he is saying we should get our own places so that we can save some money (because this way I would get help from the state). He wants to do this for about a year, and he also says we need a little time apart because we've been together so long and been through so much. I don't agree with it, and I don't really understand it, but we've talked about it and talked about it and I really don't have a choice in the matter. He says he'll be over all the time and that I can keep EVERYTHING at my place, that he just wants to keep his clothes in his place. He's not as affectionate as he used to be, but he still wants sex. Guys, help me out here, what is he trying to tell me, is there any hidden agendas I should be concerned about or should I just believe him that he wants to try and save money and work on getting new things like furniture and/or car(s)? He says he feels we're going nowhere fast right now with his two dead end jobs. So I'm guessing he thinks this will be the easy way out? I'm not sure how to read him right now. What would you guys think if your guy wanted to do this...also, if any guys know what this means, please I need some insight. Should I trust this??

I may not be a brilliant economist..but where is the money saving? I dont see it, do you? If he moves out he needs to pay for his place, support your place, you ,and the baby! I could be wrong..did you talk about actual money figures? What exactly is the money thats being saved? If you and your bf have discussed it and you really are saving money, then ok...but still he shouldnt move out! You have a kid together and the kid needs to have his dad around. Plus, if he wants space tell him to go out 2 or 3 times a night after work or something. Why does he need a whole place to himself just to get away? Hmm he says "we're getting nowhere fast" but how does this crap help? Tell him how you feel and be persistant because this is your future and your child's future. You dont really want the state to support you do you?
-melissa

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last year me and my bf broke up and he spread all these rumors about me making the whole school think im a slut, etc, etc... since then ive never wanted to date a guy from my school because im scared that those rumors are going to come up again and people look at me like im an even bigger slut for going out with someone else.. i KNOW i shouldnt care what people think of me, so please dont say anything like that.. theres this guy that I like and he likes me too and he wants a relationship with me, but i told him how i felt about not wanting to date a guy from school.. I told him this, "i really want to be with you too, but from everything [i told him about what happened last yr] i just dont want the title of being 'boyfriend n girlfriend' but i would want to be like together and know we like eachother but not really be bf and gf".. I think he got kind of mad at that.. I dont know what to do because Im really scared that rumors are going to start up again, etc.. any advice? thanks

People are morons, especially in high school. You'd think as we got older this crap would stop right? Guess not. well my advice is to take the title and to go on with it as if nobody has ever called you a slut. You have friends right..so between your friends and your new bf i think you could be happy if you tune out all those idiots. Those people who call you that are the jealous ones..or they are the ones who have nothing better to do than make fun of you. Its just my opinion though..its somethin to think about
-melissa

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What are the signs that let you know that you ARE ready to have sex for the first time?

signs? no no, there arent any signs. Its not like pregnency or PMSing where you have signs that its coming. Your ready to have sex when you feel in your heart that its time. People might say "your ready when you have a job, husband, etc" but thats only opinion. Fact is, your ready when your ready. It could be before marriage or after..Some have morals and standards...like I want to wait..but thats just me. whenever your ready, your ready. Dont force yourself either way.
I hope i helped
-melissa

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So my mom and my dad fight constantly and they are kind of alcholics...I always find myself crying myself to sleep and wishing that i had different parents...But neway..one night my dad locked me and my mom out of the house and it was so bad that my mom had to call the police on him....I have never done nething to my dad to make him treat me this way....This may sound horribe but im actually terrified of him...What should i do...please i need advice really bad bcuz this is something that has been bothering me for awhile and i never really had the guts to talk to ppl about it......HELP!

Stay with a friend for a few days and relax. There you should call social services..unless you have relatives in mind you'd want to live with..or maybe a really close friend would be willing to adopt you. Dont let this happen anymore, your parents aren't fit to be good parents..you desserve good parents. Every child does.
Best of luck..
-melissa

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I'm 15/f in highschool and I know this girl who is pregnant. This isn't about wether its right or wrong, but, she's 15 also, and in my grade. I've known her since 4th grade(just about). She just found out she was pregnant, and I'm on good terms with her and everything, but were not best friends. Y'know? I was thinking I should go up to her and tell her that if she needs anything, I'd be there for her. Should I? Would it be inappropiate? -Sarah

No, I think that would make her feel better. If it were me, id appreciate it. Right now shes going through the toughest time in her life, and she needs plenty of support. So you had a good idea and i think it would put a smile on her face.
Hope i helped
-melissa

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My boyfriend lives with me, and he's always here (I'm 14/f), that's not the problem though. I just feel like he never really pays attention to me. He's playing video games, or he's on the computer, and I do so much for him, all I want is attention. How do I talk to him, or make him want me more, not even in a sexual way, but I just want attention. How do I tell him this without him thinking I want sex and without him being mad and have it actually work? sorry it's confusing, but I really need advice. I'll rate.

Hey, he lives with you so i think all you need to do is spice things up. Sometime when hes playing video games go beside him and give him a hug and some kisses..who can turn down that? If he turns it down for some reason, then i would definately tell him whats been on your mind. Telling him isnt such a bad plan anyway. One day drag him out of the house or go see a movie...get him out more often. Then you`ll naturally start talking and having fun
good luck with everything
-melissa

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please help me. im 14 and when i was 9 my mum left me and i was left with my dad but my dad blaimed me and he started hitting me and then he has been taken to court but he wont get sent to prison because i cant give evidence because i cut myself and im 'suicidal' so they say im mentally unstable what shall i do i want to die and im scared.

How often does he hit you? If he hits you often, get a video camera, a small one if you can, and hide it somewhere. Capture your dads abuse on the camera, and take it to the police. If you cant do that, try and stop cutting yourself so the next time your dad hits you you'll have evidence. You must have bruises all over, and they think you did that to yourself? Im sorry your in this horrible situation,..have you talked to your guidance couselor or a trusted adult? Try that maybe. A tape recorder could even catch him. Maybe go to a friends house to live there and unwind for a week or two.
I really hope everything works out..drop me somethin in my inbox if you have anything else to ask
-melissa

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i have been going out with this guy brandon,brandon has an ex gf thats very jealous and wants him back shes made a huge deal about it she threatened me, my friends,shes been saspended.brandon said he would never go back out with her that shes stupid shes gotten so many people in trouble and upset.I kno the only reason why brandon ever went out with her in the first place is becuase he wanted sex,she did everything for him she did his hw,shed sleep with him whenever,just everything.he called me and told me things werent working out between us and he wanted to break up i agreed are relationship wasnt as good as i thought it was i wasnt upset about it i didnt really care until my friend karina called and told me he was hooking back up with his ex gf.I think thats so fucked up its really bothering me and i dont kno how to face it school starts agian monday and i have to see them both i kno someones going to mention something and ask me why he is with her i dont kno what to do help

Hey, its his problem that hes back with her. Your bf probably wants to be pampered by this ho. So fine , let him. But hes gonna be real sad when he finds out later in life that his wife wont pamper him..hes dependant on this girl. He probably has no real feelings for her, he just wants sex and someone to do his hw. When people mention it to you say things werent working out and he went back to that ho, just so he can have sex and have her do his homework. Just tell everyone the truth, its not like they're going to make fun of you...you didnt do anything wrong.
-melissa

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anybody know of good colors for braces

yeah, when i had braces i usually got blue..i wouldnt get black because then it looks like you have cavities lol. Clear is good also. pick your favorite color

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OK.. kind of a complicated situation.. I am currently dating this great guy.. hes 16.. and we just got through a temp. break up.. well.. today.. i found out my ex just moved back to his dads from tennesse.. he was the guy i lost my virginity to..hes now 18.. im 14.. i know im young.. but i love them both.. and i know they both like me.. the 16 year old is in love with me.. i found out the 18 year old was back today when i saw him walking.. i met up with him.. and gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.. well.. we ended up in a french kiss.. i told him me n my boyfriend were broken up..

i dont feel bad about the kiss.. it was great.. but i feel bad that i lied to the guy i kissed..

i have to choose between these two guys.. who do u think i should choose?

If you dont feel bad about the kiss...and you feel bad about lying to the guy u kissed..i think you answere your own question. You must like the 18 year old more..so I would dump the 16 yr old. Hope i helped..good luck :)
-melissa

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ok my boyfriend and i had oral sex. i fell like i have betrayed everyone and now i dont know if i was ready. is this normal?
Thanks
Lauren

yeah, its normal. This was something new to you and something you did for the first time. It sounds like its a regret of yours, but after a few days you might change your mind. Its not like your a prostitute and did it with a stranger..you did it with someone you really care about...try not to feel bad...even if uyou still regret it..its no biggie..there are plenty more regrets to come in life
-melissa

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is it normal for a 13/m to all of the sudden get a searing anger that he squeezes his fists and tightens his jaw so as not to do something drastic?

because thats been happening a couple times a day to me lately. is it normal? it happens for about 2 seconds then goes away. thank you.

Sometimes, absolutely it is. But a couple times a day?? Thats a bit much. Think about what angers you..talk to a guidance couselor. They are there to listen! I think all you need is someone to listen to you. Express ur feelings..you`ll be fine
-melissa

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me and this guy "B" went out 4 a year. he then went 2 a different school, and now starting high school, we go to the same one. were talking again...were eachothers 1st loves...except we didnt lose it wit each other. when we broke up he got with someother girl and they ended up doing it a few times. but when this school year started we have been talking alot laytlee...and well do u think it'll b weird if i lost it with him?!

It depends on your morals. If you only want to lose your virginity to a virgin, then it would be weird. But if it doesnt matter to you, then it shouldnt be all that weird.So it really depends on your values. Dont do it if you think it will be weird..1st times are supposed to be special :)
-melissa

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i am going to the movies with my boyfriend. i was wondering if i should make a move on him? should i kiss him? Im new at this so i dont know what i should do. my friends are coming along too and i dont know if i should make a move because they are also there. would it be weird if i did make a move? please help!

If it were me, I wouldnt want to do that if my friends would be around. I'd want it to be when we were alone. If there is an opportunity though, i would take it. Like if you and your bf decide to sit in back for the commercials or something..and then go and sit by your friends after..then thats a good opportunity to do it. Instead maybe just hold his hand or cuddle next to him during the movie. That shouldnt be too weird with your friends around. have fun
-melissa

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My brother recently kissed a lesbian, and disgusting thoughts came up in my mind, so I thought I'd just ask this question...

IF A REGULAR GUY KISSES A LESBIAN, WHAT DOES THAT MAKE THE GUY?

Please answer, don't leave me in suspense!

It doesnt make him anything. Guys are turned on by lesbians..how you found out he kissed a lesbian, i have no idea why..but it doesnt make your brother gay. A lot of guys would love to kiss a lesbian.

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a boy told me something i wont disclose but it was almost a threat. i told my mom who told the principal and he got expelled. that was in october and i still feel bad and guilty. people say i did the right thing but i feel bad!
plus he has my adress and he scares me. i m probably overreacting but o well. i feel guilty and scared.

why would you feel so bad? this boy threatend you and scared you. Nobody should have to live in fear. You did the right thing and hopfully this boy learned a lesson
-melissa

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i like this guy. and we are going out. but see he's the kinda guy who doesnt hold hands, kiss etc. like he wants to but i dont know if hes nervous or just is scared to. anyways ive made some moves but i dotn want to make all the moves. what do i do to make him do all that stuff. so hes not soo slow? ive even talked to him. and he keeps telling me he is going to do something. but he doesnt. im waiting and waiting. what do i do? and i dont want to dump the guy if you think i should.

Hey, no sweat. Guys are pretty shy especially around that age. When your together..massage him..give him kisses..and eventually ..hopefully...he`ll feel comfortable and he`ll start making the moves also.
-melissa

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I don't know whats wrong with me. I've been with my boyfriend for about two years now. I really do love him, and I know he loves me even more. But lately I've felt like things are just kinda drifting between the two of us. Like- it's not how it used to be. I feel like a jerk too because when I ask him if he's been feeling different lately- he always says no and that he never would ever think of breaking it off with me. Then I feel stupid for thinking things aren't working out. I know I love him, he's the cutest guy ever and he treats me pretty good. I am happy with him, but then why am I feeling like something isn't right? Am I just thinking too much or what!? Please, whats my problem?!

After the first several months, relationships dont have that "wonderful feeling" anymore. Some excitement is lost, and its all natural. I mean, look at your parents...some parents still have it going strong..but usually they dont make out everyday, wreslte in the snow,..the beginning stuff. But thats not what a relationship is all about..its a natural process. If your happy with him and you have feelings for him still..stay with him. Do something spontaneous one night..like have a romantic dinner or blindfold him and give him a few kisses ;)
-melissa

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