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do you have any idea how being in jail for about a year could change or affect a person. It could be hurtful, but looking at the other side it could maybe help make that person stronger or be a learning opportunity (link)
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I personally have no experience in being in jail but my mom uses it as a tool to help people. She visits people in jail and pretty much gives them hope.
She is a stronger woman because of it and she does say she regrets what she did but she knows she is better now and can help people.
My older brother, who is in his 30s, was in jail in his early 20s. He is a much better man and has also learned from the experience.
So it really depends on the person and how they decide to see the situation. It's their choice to learn from it or to just keep screwing up.
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Iv been dating my boyfriend for over a year &i am head over heels in love with him. I know this is immature and annoying to get anxiety over but everytime he watches porn I get such anxiety and mad at him. I try to hide it as best as I can. I know he should be allowed to do whatever and I don't want to control him in ANYWAY or tell him what he can or can't do but it makes me feel so bad. He never calls me pretty or gives me compliments so I get nervous when he's looking at other beautiful girls. If I told him I know he'd be mad I'm trying to tell him what to do. I feel bad for feeling this way but I can't help it. What should I do? Any advice is appreciated! (: thanks!!! (link)
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Porn causes problems in a lot of relationships.
To be able to have porn in the relationship, both people have to be ok with it.
If you don't like it, you won't be happy in this relationship.
I have one friend who watches porn and his girlfriend doesn't mind.
My boyfriend doesn't watch porn because I don't like it.
It's not necessarily a bad thing to watch porn, but it's more of a preference.
It's like other things that can cause problems in relationships. Smoking, drinking, ect.
You have to sit down and talk to him. Talk to him calmly and don't start talking to him in an accusing tone, if that makes sense. In other words, don't point fingers.
Tell him that him watching porn is affecting you because it makes you feel uncomfortable. Tell him that you aren't trying to control him but this is making you feel bad.
Now, if he loves you, he shouldn't get mad over this. These kinds of things need to be discussed in a relationship. It can make you resent him and it could eventually end the relationship.
There has to be compromise, or else you're not going to be happy.
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-I'm 13
-I'm a fine-haired light blond
-I have blue eyes
- I have a triangular-ish face
- and I wear huge glasses :p (I swear I'm not lying!)
A lot of people say I should get my hair cut in a pixie, but I'm afraid the guys will think I look boyish and ugly. :( and that some of the girls might call me lesbian :(( (I'm not, by the way)
any advice?
Ps: this website needs a fashion column (link)
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I think you should. It's nice to try new things out. Plus, if you don't like it, you can always grow it out again. It won't take too long to grow and you can do cute little things with it to make it look more feminine.
If people make fun of you, that's their own insecurity talking. But I think it'd be cute and it's a good thing to do different things with your hair.
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So basically, me and this friend of mine are extremely alike. We mirror each other down to our very actions (even things such as morals and humor and art.) We even get confused of being twins or sisters a lot of the time.
She's a great friend, but she's also my boyfriends ex girlfriend(from years ago.)
Granted, they only dated for about a month, and it was awhile ago- However I feel like if they were ever to meet they would connect again.
My feelings only felt more validated when I had a dream the other night. The dream went that she was just better than me in every way shape and form - Doing everything I've done but better- and my boyfriend was head over heels for her.
I don't know where this is coming from, but I feel like I have a seed of jealousy growing inside of me , due to my friendship with her.
And in reality- I do feel a bit of jealousy towards her in those aspects -
We tend to copy each other a lot , she usually buys the same things I buy/ material things like that.
But lately - it's been getting on my nerves.
I feel questionable towards my identity-- for some odd reason - is this normal?
We have plans to start an online shop together , and she's kind of been feeding off of all of my ideas. I'm starting to question my friendship with this girl, but I know none of this is her intention.
I feel like if she can steal my ideas , she can steal my boyfriend-
For my own sanity - I need advice
How can I block out these feelings, or finally discard them once and for all?
Thanks so much,
--The Inferior One
(link)
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My advice would be to talk to her. If she is a good friend, and treats you well and it's the jealousy that is what's bothering you, then you need to talk it out to her and have her reassure you.
The other option is to dump her as a friend. But seriously, like I said, if she is truly a good friend then keep her.
You could work on your friendship by distancing a little bit. Find time to do new things so that you could make yourself feel a little better by not feeling the exact same as her.
If she can steal your boyfriend, he obviously wasn't a good boyfriend. Remember that.
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I am a 14 year old girl who desperately wants someone to love. Yes, I know that this age, kids aren't really serious about it. I have been bullied in the past since 5th grade. I wasn't exactly the sweetheart either, but I have changed. I'm known as the weird girl. I have only one friend that sometimes, I'm not sure I can trust. I have achnea badly sometimes and I refuse to wear make-up. I believe that it doesn't really do anything anyway. Could someone please give me some advice? (link)
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Like Dragonflymagic said, the best way to have a good relationship and a good boyfriend is to start out as friends.
Being known as the weird girl won't make your chances any less. There are those popular girls who stay single for a very long time as well.
So, expand your friends. Find new friends, new guys friends. And eventually one may end up having feelings for you or you might have feelings for them.
You can always fix acne with face wash and if it doesn't work, go see a dermatologist.
All the guys I ever dated were my friends at first.
Just don't go looking for a boyfriend when you choose friends. Hang out with them and enjoy yourself and then your feelings might start changing.
It'll take time but it'll happen.
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Ugh! I-I I think I love him. He asked out my best friend a few days ago and they don't even act serious. They run around chasing eachother like little kids. I told him what I felt about him and he gave me a weird look. I am now embarrased and heartbroken. What should I do? (link)
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My advice to to move on.
Moving on is hard, it will take time. It really depends on the person but it could take weeks, months, and sometimes years. But if you try hard enough, it won't take that long. Those are the people who refuse to let go.
Since he likes your best friend, it would be wrong to interfere.
You start over by going out with other friends, don't talk to him anymore, and start doing new things.
Don't sit around and cry over it. I mean you can, but not for long. Don't say, "I'm never going to get over him." Because you will become the person who never lets go.
I mean you have other options but none of them look good.
Wait around for them to break up, and maybe he'll like you..but will your friend be ok with it?
Interfere with their relationship causing your friend to resent you.
Then there is move on, the other ones will most likely just break your heart again.
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In a love triangle, the other woman told me that the man told her I am good but she is better. I ask the man about it, he replied she is lying. Up to now he stated he is lying and left her.
Who is telling the truth? (link)
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I don't know either of them. I really don't think I'd be able to tell you who is lying.
If you don't trust him, don't stay with him.
The woman is obviously trying to make you feel bad. Even if he did say that, she just had to go tell you about it. So she's just trying to put you down and make herself look better.
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also, someone said to use the "positives" of this experience and mentioned the following
-they said seeing the inside of a real jail would actually be a good experience for my daughter
-said my wife can use it as a learning experience for herself as well. Also, they said her being in jail will give her more credibility when talking about the consequences of bad choices. Well that is an interesting way of seeing it
what do you think of these (link)
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You can look at the positive side of pretty much any situation. That's the best thing to do in times like these.
Seeing the inside of a jail could be a good experience for your daughter. At least she would know that she doesn't want to end up there.
And of course this is a learning experience for your wife. Every body has gone through hard times. If someone is going through a similar situation, your wife will be able to really understand and really be a help to someone. I also see that as an interesting way of looking at this.
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I'm 18/f and have been with my fiance for 3 years now. I'll call him jake well jake has changed a lot he's turned selfish, crude, possesive, and rude. I can't even be out much with friends even if they were girls and he goes around saying he owns me.. I have been faithful untill recent with my friend "mike" and he's much nicer and everyone tells me i should be with him. But the problem is that I live with my fiance and would be homeless if we broke up. My family is in awhole different state. I've searched the internet but no hope and I don't know what to do someone please help (link)
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That is a tough situation.
You know you can't stay with your fiance. It could just get a lot worse.
Do you have any friends around? Anyone else you could turn to?
That's where I think you should start. Ask if you could stay with them till you get your feet on the ground. Or maybe they could help you on finding a place that's cheap.
I really hope your situation gets better. I know it will, but I hope it happens soon.
Good luck!
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there, so here is one of the answers I got from asking similar questions elsewhere
"Even though she is very sorry for making the mistake and even though she regrets it, she is still a delinquent and has to pay for the crime that she committed. She should have thought about it before doing it. I am sure that she will be behind bars for quite a while. She is not a good example for your daughter and I think that you should raise her all by yourself. You can take your daughter to see her delinquent mother in jail, but I suggest you only take her once a week."
this seems kind of harsh don't you think? I never said I was going to break her out of jail or something. And also like I said she admitted what she did was wrong, she is not pretending any different
(link)
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She is already paying the crime. Your daughter is watching her sit in jail, feeling sorry for her actions. She's not watching her mother lie and think she didn't do anything wrong.
With these circumstances, she is being a good role model. You can see that she is sorry and getting punished for her actions.
You could go on and on about the "should haves". She should have done this, she shouldn't have done that or that, ect. But you can't change it, you can only move on and learn from it.
I know a 16 year old girl who visits her father every Friday in jail. He committed fraud and he's paying the time. She isn't turning into a bad girl.
Your wife is in jail, whether or not your daughter acts out, it wouldn't be because of visiting her mother.
You know your daughter best. So if you think it's a good idea, then I'm sure she'll be fine.
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So i really like this girl,and i really want to ask her out. Shes my friend and sometimes it seems like she likes me, but other times it seems like shes just avoiding me or ignoring me. But i still really want to ask her out, but im scared. I dont want to choke or seem like a retard, i want to seem confident. Can you please help me?? (link)
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You have to remember that rejection hurts. There is nothing you can do to really change that.
All you have to know is that the worst she could say is no. Most likely, she isn't going to hit you or start calling you names. If she did something ridiculous, I would be questioning why you even liked her.
So the worst is no and the best is yes.
You have to build confidence in yourself. You have to start believing you are a great guy and she'd be lucky to be with you. You don't only want to seem confident, you want to be confident.
Just remember that if you don't ask her out, someone else might or you'll just never know if she felt the same.
Once you've built your confidence and believe that you are ready to ask her out. You find her, not when she's with all her friends. If she's with her friends often, then ask if you can talk to her for a second. Then just ask her out.
Almost everyone goes through this, you'll be fine.
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Soo i went to a dance and it was sooo fun. People were twerking and grinning and so was i. But i have a boyfriend. I was on girls and boys ( im not bi or anything ) . But should i tell him what i was doing or not. Im scared he might be mad at me. Please help. Thaanks (link)
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It really depends on where you stand.
Do you believe that you should be honest with him?
Would you be ok if he was going to a dance and doing that with other girls?
I don't know you, I don't know if you talk to him about what's ok and what's not ok. But this, you're not sure of.
I do believe if you start feeling guilty, you'll feel like you were cheating on him or betraying him.
Trust and communication is a big deal in relationships.
If I was in that position, I would tell him. Only because if you want a true relationship with him, you need to know where the boundaries are.
If he's not ok with that, then you shouldn't do it. If he is ok with that, then ok, it's fine.
If he gets mad at you, then that's ok. You'll have to work through that.
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I've been in love (not just a crush) this guy for years. Except now he has a girlfriend and it's breaking my heart. Should I tell him what I'm feeling? I'm worried that if I do I might ruin our friendship but if I don't, I think that my heart will just continue to break. (link)
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That's a really hard situation.
I would completely understand if you wanted to tell him how you feel since you've been holding back all these years but, since he's not available, it wouldn't be fair to either of you.
It wouldn't be fair to you, because what if he really likes his girlfriend and he doesn't want to leave her to be with you?
It'll be putting him in a tough situation because his friend likes him but he has a girlfriend.
Plus, if they are happy, you don't want to ruin a happy relationship. Even if they weren't happy, it wouldn't be your place to get in the way.
So you can tell him, but you couldn't expect anything in return. Remember that.
You could move on. Which is definitely easier said than done. But if you wanted to, it wouldn't be impossible.
Or you can wait around till he's single again.
Honestly, I'm not sure what you are expecting out of this. No matter what you do, there is possibility of heartbreak.
So you see all the possible choices, and you'll know what's best. Good luck and I'm sure things will get better.
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There's a boy named freddy,I met him when I was in second grade,I've always hated him because he took my cousin away,we never talked but until 7th grade.I don't know why because freddy hangs with the 'cool' group and I hang with any avereage group.well we walk home together with another boy named cyrus ,they always ask who I lllike and I ay no one.one time I head cyus and freddy whispering about something but for some reason the. Wont tell me.I need advice. How can I mmake him tell me who he likes (link)
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Do you like one of them?
I'm just gonna assume you do because no one should be so curious unless they have feelings for them.
You can't make them tell you but you can try to hint around. Maybe ask them who the lucky girl is. I mean they pester you about it, so you can say the same thing.
You could be like, "Since you guys ask me who I like all the time, who do you like?"
Eventually, you'll find little hints if it's you. Or eventually one of them will tell you.
Just try to become good friends with them and see what happens.
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I am an 18 year old female, freshman in college. At my school, probably like every other school, we have this facebook page for you to go on and anonymously post who you think is cute or who you would like to date. Well, in my english class all year, I thought this kid was cute, I catch him looking at me sometimes but that's it. He's very shy, he doesn't talk much in class, matter of fact-I don't either, though really. Anyway, I posted on the facebook page, though and said that I think he is very handsome and that I would date him in a heartbeat. He commented back and said "come forward person who posted this." So, I was thinking about waiting until the last day of class and I was going to message him and tell him that it was me or something along the lines of "okay, I'm coming forward." I want to do it the last day of classes, which is May 17th by the way, because we have a twelve week summer. In case he doesn't feel the same way, I won't feel like an idiot sitting in class knowing that he knows and knowing that he said no. Plus the summer will give him time to think, he'll be able to message me if he wants. But, I'm kind of a chicken and I'm not sure if I will be able to do it or not. So, I guess I'm asking for guys and girls alike for their opinions. Would you want me to tell you? Would you think I was weird? What would you do? Thanks! (link)
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I like the idea of it but you'd still be making him wait awhile. So he could probably brush it off as a joke or lose interest.
Maybe tell him a few days before the last day. Then at least he can see you in class and see what he thinks. Then approach him and see what happens.
If a guy did that, yes I'd want them to tell me because if not, I'd feel embarrassed and thought someone was playing a joke. I wouldn't think you were weird.
I think the best thing to do is tell him a couple days before the last day. Even if it might be awkward if he wasn't interested, it would be worth it because if you wait till the last day, you won't be able to talk in person until he messages you on Facebook.
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I have a problem.My problem is there is this guy name james,and I'm not sure if I like him.When ever I'm in class ,I always glance his ways,sometimes he staring at me.I'm curious he still mad because on valentine's day I decided to play a prank so I sent a gram to a girl name julie, she sits by him,anyway is says"will you be my girlfriend ,love james"ever since I sent that ,we just stopped talking,well we have a small conversation.I dont know what to do,because I'm not those girls that believe in love (I'm 12 yrs old and a girl) (link)
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Well, I don't know you so I can't really tell how you are feeling about this boy.
If you do think you might have a crush on him, try being his friend first.
He's probably staring at you because you caused him embarrassment.
So you could start talking to him more often and try being his friend and see what happens from there. You can apologize to him about the prank and say you'd like to be friends. And once you start being his friend, you'll see how he really is and see if you still like him.
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Hi there, so i really like this girl and i think its time i asked her out. But the thing is that i've asked 3 girls out before(I asked one of them in a note, another of them i choked and my friend told her, and the last one i asked her out on Facebook.) and i've been rejected all of them. How do i get the guts to ask her out in a proper way, and im really scared to get rejected once more. (link)
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Well I'm glad you want to ask her out properly rather than hide behind a computer or paper.
I wish you had listed your age, it's hard to give advice not knowing how old you are.
I'm just going to assume you are young, like teenage years.
Most young girls won't say yes to a guy they don't know. That's why when you're younger, it's better to be friends first. When you're older, it's easier to ask them out to dinner or something to get to know them and see if you really are interested.
Now, if the girl says no even if she knows you, that just means she's plainly not interested.
So since you are already friends with her, all you have to do is ask her out.
Almost every guy is afraid of rejection. You aren't alone. It takes courage to ask a girl out. Rejection is a part of life, not everyone is going to want to go out with you but if you don't do it, you'll never know if she actually would have.
My advice is to first ask her to hang out. Like go see a movie, or some other activity like bowling, skating, ect.
That way is so much better because you'll know if she is interested in you more than just a friend. And if you get rejected, you only got rejected by asking her to hang out.
So the only part you really need to work on is to get past the fear of rejection. Once you get the courage, you will be able to ask her out.
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I met this girl during a birthday party for a friend. She's the roommate of a friend of mine and we had two classes together. We started talking more throughout the semester and I have developed feelings for her. But she is in a relationship, and just celebrated her 1 year anniversary with the guy. I feel like shes flirting with me and today she gave us a nickname based on something we did together. So I'm trying to figure out if she likes me or is just being friendly. Thanks. (link)
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She might be into you but you didn't give enough information to say so.
She might think of you as a good friend or she might see you as more.
Either way, don't go for her. She has a boyfriend and I'm sure you know to respect the boundaries. If you didn't, trouble will happen.
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hi. i just got my period and dont know what to say to my mom..... it feels really awkward talking like that. help!!!!!! (link)
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Well your mom has gone through this before. So she will understand. Plus, you're gonna have to because she's gonna be the one buying your pads.
When I first got my period when I was 12, I told my mom when my brother and my dad wasn't around. I asked her, "Mom, how old were you when you got your period?" She answered 12 and then asked, "Did you start?"
Anyways, it was simple for me but all you have to say is, "Mom, I have my period, what do I do?"
It might feel awkward for you but she should be expecting that conversation to come up eventually. You shouldn't be embarrassed because she's gone through it before.
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For saying things like "now mom is the one being ordered around" I think she is just trying to
Crack jokes to make the situation not feel as bad or just pointing out an irony. I don't necessarily think that is wrong is it (link)
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I'm really not sure. I don't think it's right to talk about her mom like that.
I mean she might be making a joke but it kinda lowers her moms status of a mother. If that makes any sense.
But it's probably harmless.
As long as she doesn't start talking bad about her mother, it should be ok.
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