i totally agree THNXS!!! but she dosent really treat me llike a friend cause she drags me around like a puppy and more... she is always saying i am stupid @ times YET i put up with it because she can be nice @ ttimes 2!!! but i ALWAYS feel like she is trying to control me! and if i say simething like "i dont really want to walk i wanna rest here" because i just had gym and worked out. SHE RESPONDS BY SAYING "ohh come on you big baby! and stop whinning" BUt when i think about it that is just her personality @ times. AND I THINK that is why i never stand up for her SOMETIMES... i do stand up for her sometimes.
So does the way she treat me change the situation ?? IDK what do you think now??
Well, it really depends on you.
Does her doing that bother you to the point where you wouldn't want to be friends? Because you know if she finds out that you're telling people that you don't like her behind her back, she's not going to trust you anymore. She probably won't be your friend for a while either.
Like I said, there's a grey area. You don't necessarily have to take that confrontation if you don't want to. When someone at school asks why you like her, you could say, "You don't know her like I do, and I'm not going to talk about this."
That doesn't really leave them the option of bringing it up. You would be handling it maturely and standing up for her at the same time. It would be like saying, "I like her. I don't care if you don't. Now stop talking." Only it's put in much nicer terms, so you can avoid a fight or argument.
She shouldn't be dragging you around her calling you a big baby when you want to rest after gym, but is that really worth losing her completely? Instead of bottling up how you feel and letting it come out when someone else is talking about her behind her back, bring it up to her right then. Say, "Hey, I really don't like when you say stuff like that. I just had to run a bunch of gym, and I want to rest for a minute, if that's okay."
You would be firmly and directly saying that you would really appreciate it if she would stop saying things like that, but at the same time, you wouldn't be saying anything mean or hurtful. Plus, you would get your feelings out that, and she might stop acting like that. If she stops that, you'll actually want to stand up for her when someone is being mean behind her back.
Good luck,
Darby(:
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Hey, i have this friend and she is not liked very much by other kids @ our skool! But she dosent know this. And everyone is always asking me why i am her friend. sometimes i dont stand up for her behind her back when people ask me that because, they think i am cool when i say i dont really like her when she is like my best friend! What do i do?? i like her alot BUT no one else does? ?
What do i do?? LOST AND CONFUSED?
sincerely: MMR
If you like her and think she's cool, be a true friend. Don't worry about what the kids at your school think. The second you graduate, they're all going to forget about you and you'll forget about them. It's best to stick true to the people that actually care about you. If your best friend finds out that you're telling people that you don't really like her, she will likely no longer be your best friend.
There is a middle ground, you know. This is not a black or white issue. The grey area would be saying, "Well, she's my friend. You don't have to like her, but I do. Goodbye now." Or, you could even ignore them. Say, "Mk, whatever." and go about your business.
If the people that are telling you this really thought you were cool, they wouldn't think it was such a negative thing that you're friends with who you want to be friends with.
Just do your thing and let everyone else do theirs. You can't stop them from asking why you're friends with her. But if you say, "Oh, well, I do what I want, so.. bye." enough times, they'll get over it and move on to something else.
It's a better choice than ruining a friendship so that you'll look 'cool'.
-Darby
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so when i get fingered i get really wet and i dont know why cuz sometimes im not even turrned on, can something stop this? and do guys not like it?
Guys like it, and there's nothing you can do to stop it. It's your body's natural reaction, and it's not a bad thing.
Darby(:
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i thought me and my best friend were honest to each other but she wasnt to me , well we practically did everything together , we even shower together, i just to tell her everything about me but she always hide stuff for me , because she thought i would judge because of my religion beliefs , shes kind off wild she dates alot of guys and knowing that they all close friends, and she likes having sex with guys shes not dating or that she doesnt know that well. i was i a huge crush on this guy since middle school and i found out a couple months ago that she was talking to him , i got pissed off , because she knew i was practically in love with him , well i lie and told her i didnt care and taht i didnt like him ,the next day i hear they dating , and it got me mad because she kiss him in from of me and stuff , well 2 weeks later she breaks up w/ him because the guy that shes in love goes to the same school and hes mad that she was dating him. then six months later she stills talks to my crush and goes to his house every day and my crush bff told me that they had sex everyday , since then i stop talking to her for that , i didnt wantted to confront her cause i know shes going to deny it , she knows i know about it and she havent come up to me and said sorry. is being 2 months since the last time i spoke to her and i miss her . and plus summer is here and we planned so many stuff this summer and idk what to do should i call or text her saying why i dont talk to her , or should i wait for her to do it?
oh btw she had sex with my brother and didnt tell me for 5 months and she deny it during that time
* im a female im 17 years old
I don't think you should talk to her until she talks to you. If you just stopped talking to her and she didn't even care enough to find out why you weren't talking to her, she's not much of a best friend. It's been two months since you last talked to her and not once has she tried to resolve anything. If I were you, I would just try to move on and find new friends. Obviously this one isn't capable of being trustworthy. If she had sex with your brother, didn't tell you, and denied it- that alone would make me drop a friend.
It's not as though you haven't been a good friend to her. You've given her chances to fess up to things, which she just repeatedly lied about. Then she dated a guy that she knew for a fact you had a major crush on. You should have told her that it wasn't okay with you. Of course you don't want to be the one standing in the way. But if you had told her that and she got with him anyway, you would know for a fact that she's not a good friend. But, since you told her it was okay, she's going to say "What? You told me it was okay and that you didn't like him."
With your future friends, don't be afraid of a little confrontation. If you think something is up that you need to know the truth about, ask. That's what friends are for. They're supposed to be honest. You're supposed to be able to ask them questions and get a straight, truthful answer.
It sucks that you guys are friends anymore, but if I were you, I'd just let it go. It's been far too long to bring it up now. If she really cared, she would have asked you two months ago. If you bring it up now, she's honestly probably not going to care. You haven't talked to her since April; just let it lay until she brings it up and apologises to you.
Darby(:
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heyy its me again =/ haha the girl with the ex bf problems. i hope you remember me.
so yeah one of my friends that's friends with him and me is having a little get-together thing at her house in a few days and she invited him. this is my first like long-term relationship ex-boyfriend so i don't really know how to play it. i want him to know that i still love him and want him back without acting clingy and stuff it's gonna be all our friends hanging out so i just want to have a good time and hope something happens between us. so my questions are what should i do to let him know i still love him and want to be with him without being all clingy and stuff and should i hug him when i get there? i know i'm gonna be the same girl i was last summer when he fell in love with me but any special tips? as you can probably tell by now i really love this guy and would do anything to get him back. thank you so much.
A hug would definitely be okay as long as the timing and location are right. If you have to walk in between a bunch of people to get to the couch he's sitting on just to give him a hug, I probably wouldn't go for it when you first get there. Instead, just try to catch him in private and some point and say, "I'm glad you're here. It's nice to see you." Then give him a hug, if he seems comfortable.
If he's just standing up or in a good location when you arrive, definitely give him a hug. Say about the same thing, ya know, "It's nice to see you" and give him a hug at the same time.
Since it is just a casual get together, you shouldn't go as far as letting him know that you still love him. If he gets that feeling, he gets that feeling and that's great too, but you don't want to push things or make anyone uncomfortable.
Letting him know that you're happy that he's there and happy to see him will be enough to get him to keep his eyes on you. If you get an opportunity, talk to him in private. Say, if he goes to the kitchen to get a drink, try going with him. (without being too obvious) You know, if he says, "I'm thirsty" and starts to go to the kitchen, say, "Yeah, me too" and go along with him.
Then you'll get to talk to him in private. Ask him how he's been, let him know that he looks nice, and if possible, even slip in something like, "I've missed you, it's great to see you."
He'll catch on quickly (hopefully) and talk to you back so the conversation will be kept alive.
Good luck(:
Darby
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Hi. 17/m. A week or so ago, my girlfriend said she likes when I treat her 'rough', but how can I do this? I don't realize what I'm doing when I'm with her, so I don't know what I did that was rough? So yeah...how to treat her rough, without being too agressive? Thanks.
You'll have to ask her exactly what she meant by that. Different girls are into different things, so you need to ask for clarification on that. I'm not sure if you mean sexually or emotionally or physically. Just tell her you want to give her what she wants but you're not really sure what she meant by being 'rough'. I'm sure she'll go further into detail as to what she meant.
Darby(:
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What are your top 5 favorite songs? I'm looking for new music to try :)
Constantly changing, but right now:
*In Between Days by The Cure
*One More Night by Bob Dylan
*Wart Hog by The Ramones
*Brand New Colony by The Postal Service
*Sounds of Laughter by T.S.O.L.
(:
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okay so we broke up like a little over a month ago and i've been talking to his sister and she says that he has no social life since we broke up, and he's been being mean to his friends and stuff and he was doing better with me (he had a social life with my friends-guys&girls too but now they kinda don't like him cuz he dumped me). the last month while we were dating he would lie to me and tell me "his mom wouldn't let him go out" or "he had homework" and he never used to do this for like the first 6 months we were together. she says hes lazy but he still likes me. i guess what i'm saying is that i miss who he used to be...we were planning on hanging out when school is over, so my question is, do you think i can get him back the way he used to be during the first 6 months? how? things were perfect last summer and i want them to be this summer too. and please don't tell me to just move on, if worst comes to worst i know that i can. i just want to give this a shot because i do miss who he was. thanks so much. 17/f hes 17.
It sounds like your boyfriend is struggling with a bout of depression. Whether or not it's a clinical, diagnosable depression is another thing. The only thing that really matters is how your ex is feeling. Even when he was with you, he wasn't wanting to hang out. Whether this change came gradually or suddenly doesn't really matter. What matters is that he no longer had an interest in doing the things he loved to do before.
When people get depressed their family and friends would probably often classify them as 'lazy'. That's because a lot of people with depression are feeling hopeless. They don't see any point in socializing, meeting people, or going anywhere with people they did hang out with at one time.
Did you have get a clear answer from your ex as to why he was breaking up with you and why he started making up lies in order to not hang out with you? Because he did this, but still wanted to hang out at the end of the school, it makes me think that he does miss you too.
There, of course, is no 100% guaranteed way to make him be like he was the first six months you were dating. But since you're wanting to try to rekindle things, start with first things first.
If you don't know already, find out why he didn't want to hang out any more and why he broke up with you. Even if you do already know, revisit that idea while talking to him. If he says that his feelings just fizzled out, ask him if he thinks that would happen again. Ask him what he thinks made that happen.
If it was something else, of course just ask similar questions accordingly. Don't take answers like "I dunno". If he wants to get you back, he's going to have to at least communicate how he is feeling now and how he was feeling then. If he doesn't do that, as much as you don't want to hear it, you're only setting yourself up for more heartache.
If you don't talk to him on the phone now, start doing so. Let him know what's been on your mind and let him talk so you'll know what's on his mind as well.
Take things slow. Don't just jump into a full-blown committed relationship. Start hanging out just as friends. Go see a movie. Go to dinner. Go to the skating rink/bowling alley/park. Go wherever it is that teens in your town hang out. This will be good because you'll get him out of the house. He doesn't seem to be getting out much at all nowadays. He's probably not going to want to go out somewhere where he'll see a bunch of people from school at first. So a movie or dinner would be a good place to start.
Once you guys have gone on a couple dates, see where you're at. See how your feelings are. Are you still wanting to date? Are you wanting to push the friendship further? If so, make a date to hang out at one of your houses. You'll get some privacy where you'll be able to talk face-to-face about moving your relationship along to the dating level.
In the end, you're only an individual. As much as you miss who he was, you can't make him be that again. If he is struggling with a depression, be a shoulder of support for him to lean on. He should also go to a therapist or doctor and get evaluated if he does believe that depression might be playing an active role in how he's feeling.
If he doesn't co-operate with you or you see that he's not wanting to change, you'll have to move forward. You don't really need to think about that thoroughly right now, since you're in the beginning stages. But keep in mind that you need to not let him treat you however he wants. He's not going to be able to be 'lazy' and be in a committed relationship. Relationships take time and effort. If he's not willing to put forth that time and effort, he's best forgotten. Just keep that in your mind as you make the advances towards rekindling your relationship.
In the meantime, just have fun with it. Like I said, don't move too quickly. It's hard to not get your emotions involved since you've already dated before, but try to push them off at least for the first couple dates. Don't let them play a huge role at the very beginning. If he decides that he doesn't want to put for the effort and try to start a new relationship, you'll be left heartbroken right at the beginning of summer. Just play in smooth and have a good time.
Good luck!
Darby(:
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i know that the first time a girl has sex, if her cherry hasnt been popped, then it can be pretty painful. so then is it normal after that first time for her to be very sore down there for a couple days?
The amount of pain varies for every person, of course. But yes, it can be sore down there for a couple days afterwards, and usually is. After the first couple times, it will be more comfortable.
Darby(:
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Do guys not like it when girls wear their hair in a ponytail? How do guys like girls to wear their hair?
Every single person is different. The same way girls like different hairstyles/clothes on guy, guys like different hairstyles/clothes on girls. There is no real answer to the questions you are asking since guys have different preferences. You could get 4 guys that say they like long hair in ponytails, 5 that say that like short hair that is kept down, 3 guys that say they like medium length hair. It all depends on the guy.
Honestly, I don't even think guys worry that much about what girls wear or how they do their hair. As long as you look like you take care of yourself to some extent, I'm sure it will be fine. I have all guy friends and they very rarely discuss whether or not they like girls to wear ponytails.
Just be comfortable and confident in yourself and guys will see that you are confident and will find that attractive. You can't possibly dress and wear your hair in a way that will be attractive to every guy, or even most of them, because guys have different taste and styles.
They are just like girls. How some girls like guys with long hair, other like guys with short hair. Some like preppy guys, some like rocker guys. It literally all depends on the specific person. But if a guy really likes you, he's not going to say, "Oh, crap. I really like her, but she wears skinny jeans and sometimes where's ponytails. Oh well."
He's just going to like you for you and your personality. Don't put so much thought into your appearance. Just take care of yourself, hygiene-wise. Bathe, wear deodorant, brush your hair, brush your teeth. Other than that, wear what you like wearing. Do your hair how you like it. Guys will either like it or they won't. And there is no style that every guy will be attracted to. It's just not possible. Just do what you like doing.
Darby
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18/f.
I really need help. Throughout my life I've always noticed that i'm very clingy and needy and I always need reassurances that people like me. It pushes people away and i'm totally aware of that but I feel like there's no way I can stop myself from doing whatever it is that I do. I always push people away in relationships because I have such high expectations for what they should do and how they should treat me, and it's really causing me problems. It leads to arguments and all-around them realizing it's not worth it.
I really want help in figuring out what it is I have to do to stop being like this. I don't want to push the guy I have no away, because I really do love him, but it's like.. I don't know what to do. He's so good to me, but the second he mentions that he's going somewhere or he's busy or whatever, I absolutely freak out inside. Its like I take it so personally that he cant talk, and it's terrible. I get these ideas that if he really loved me like he says, he would just wanna talk to me nonstop. Please give me some advice on how to put up with this kind of situation, how to not push him away.
You have to understand that people are only human. They cannot be perfect no matter how hard they try because humans are not perfect. No matter how great your boyfriend is, at times, he is going to get busy. That doesn't mean he loves you less than he did yesterday when he wasn't busy. It just means that he has a life and has things to do.
If you find someone that literally has every second to spend talking to you, there is something severely wrong with that person.
Put yourself in your boyfriend's shoes. Do you have every second to spend talking to your boyfriend? Do you not have school/work? You never want to hang out with friends or family? You never want to go to the mall or see a movie? You never want to sleep or just be alone and write/listen to music/read/draw?
The only thing you have to do in order to not push him away is be more understanding and less selfish. I'm not trying to be rude, but it's selfish to think that if your boyfriend really loved you, he would spend every second of his life with you or talking to you.
Can you imagine if you wanted to get off the phone to go see a movie and your boyfriend said, "Ugh! You don't really love me then!" As you have seen in the past, no one wants to be around you then.
When you're starting to feel panicky because he's getting off the phone, just let it go. You have to. You'll be alone your entire life if you don't just let it go. Get some hobbies. Writing, drawing, painting, photography, sports, music, reading, movies. Absolutely anything that you can do to occupy your time. Get some friends and hang out with them when your boyfriend is going to hang out with his friends.
You can't be so clingy because you start smothering people and they just want to escape. You just have to stop. Don't make excuses for yourself. Don't say well, because of this, I'm like this. Don't feel entitled to be so clingy. It's great that you're even asking this question because it shows that you want to change. But I have to be as blunt as possible in order to really get the point across.
Your boyfriend doesn't care about you less just because he has his own life and his own things to do every once in a while. It would be a completely different case if he was constantly going to hang out with friends and never took the time to talk to you. But as you've described him, he sounds like a really good guy. He's sweet to you and everything. Be appreciative instead of wanting more, more, more.
One person can only do so much. I think it's also important for you to keep in mind that this has nothing to do with your boyfriend. This is all about you and your insecurities, your needs for constant reassurance. You've seen that being clingy just assures that you get dumped, so try something new.
Listen to the good things people say about you and realise that they are true. When you start to feel as though you're going to start a fight over something silly (your boyfriend hanging out with his friends one time), stop yourself. Do whatever it is that you have to do to stop yourself. If you have to write down how you feel, by all means, do it! If you have to watch a movie to get your mind off of it or draw it out or get on the computer. Just do anything to not let yourself get to that point where you're going to get too clingy.
Good luck,
Darby(:
(sorry this is so long)
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My nephew, who is 12-almost 13, decided to buy me a gift for my birthday. It was a great gesture and I really appreciate his efforts but I really am not sure what to do since I really hate the gift.
So, I am very into gardening (flowers) and my nephew bought me a metal statue of some flowers. The problem is that the artwork is very large and, well, absolutely hideous. The coloring doesn't really match with my home interior so it really stands out if I do choose to let guests view it.
I know he meant well but I really do not want to display this in my home. It's very unattractive. Should I tell him that I did not really enjoy the gift (maybe even allow him to have his money refunded?) or display the gift in my home despite my feelings towards the appearance of it?
Definitely don't tell him that you don't like it. Since he's not even thirteen yet, that could be a big blow to his self-esteem. It doesn't seem like it would be a huge deal, but it might be a long time before he would ever try to give someone a gift again. He might feel as though he's not good enough, even though he tried. Of course, these aren't your intentions. That's why you're asking the question in the first place.
As the other two said, display it somewhere where your guests typically won't go. Even try displaying it in the backyard. You could put it next to some bushes and out of the way where no one could really see it unless they literally tried looking for it.
Hope this helps,
Darby(:
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This is kind of a weird question. Wasn't sure where to categorize it.
I'm 24/f. I've met this guy and I've known him for a little over two years. I really enjoy his company, and I really like him. I know he likes me too, that isn't really the problem. The problem is, I live like 4 states away, so we usually see each other every 2 months. Well, the last time I saw him was in March '09. He has a really good job, and so it's hard for him to take time off work. The thing is.. like I want this to go further. He asked me if I'd move down to where he lives, and I said yes. I really want this to happen, but I don't know how to approach him about it. I want to be his girlfriend, but I also don't know how to bring it up. I feel like I'm sitting here potentially waiting for something to happen, that realistically won't ever.. I want to bring it up in conversation, but I'm not sure how.
I really don't know what to do! Any advice would be greatly appreciated! :)
Well, you've pretty much gotten the hard part out of the way. You know that he likes you, and he must like you quite a lot to want you to live with him. now you just have to bring it up in conversation. The next time you're talking about moving down there, say something along the lines of, "So what do you consider us? As far as dating or just friends or what?"
You don't really have to worry about him saying that you're just friends since you already know he likes you. When you ask that, it will open the subject up and get you both talking about what you would consider your relationship title to be.
You can also tie the other thing right in there. The next time you're talking about moving down there, say, "Yeah, I really want to do that. When are you wanting me to move down there?" That will show that you're serious about it and that you're just waiting for the 'go'. After that, you can work together to make the transition from your current place to his current place.
Hope this helps!
Darby(:
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Some people i feel so sorry for, but i know that i can not spill my guts.. i try adn try but i still don't know. i have lately been getting some really weird ones that i am so scared to answer but i want to help. please help me figure out a way to put mean stuff nicely.
Yes, what Sima said. If you're wanting to answer but don't know how to word things without sounding mean, you just have to do it. Sometimes things need to be said bluntly. That doesn't mean you have to be especially rude or call anyone stupid. But you can say what needs to be said. Leave your personal opinion out of it. Don't say, "What the heck? You're so stupid. It's obvious that you need to break up with the guy." Say, "If I were you, I would probably leave him because (insert reasons here).
And as the person below me said, if you're getting 'weird' inbox questions or ones that you simply aren't able to answer, reject them. They'll just have to ask someone else or ask it in the open questions where everyone can answer.
Darby(:
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ok, don't laugh but i want to be emo skinny i just have a attraction to emo people but every time a try to lose weight i give in and eat i tried not eating ate, i tried eat little....ate more.....and i just want to lose weight and look skinny before the summers over can you please help and like give my some advise?
Okay, well first of all, not eating doesn't make you lose weight. Not eating will slow your metabolism down, so when you do end up eating, you'll actually gain weight instead of losing it.
The best thing to do is good old fashioned exercise and eating healthy. Make sure you eat breakfast because that gets your metabolism running.
You can still eat, you just have to eat right. Try snacking on fruit salads and vegetables with dip instead of chips, candy, and cakes.
Drink plenty of water. It's very important that you stay hydrated.
Go jogging in the mornings or evening when it's not extremely hot. It will be easier that way. Also, do sit-ups, jumping jacks, and other exercises.
There is no secret to losing weight. It's not like there's a magic pill (though company's advertise them) that makes you lose weight. Getting an eating disorder only makes you look gross. The only healthy, natural way to lose weight is through diet and exercise. It will be hard work, but if you stick to it, you will lose weight AND look/feel healthy.
Darby(:
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One of my best friends from my early childhood has recently become a rather rotten individual. Her home life has always been fragmented, and her mother is quite literally mad. This friend of mine has for the past couple of years been working on a modeling career and has honestly gotten nowhere, though she still insists that she is now and forever a model. She graduated early and left town to be with her dad, but not before she hooked up with a much older and rather "dirty" fellow here in town. With her dad, she hooked up and is "dating" a guy she met online whose description strikes me as more than a little creepy. Worst, she won't talk to me about it---hasn't mentioned ANY of this to me. Apparently, she worries that I will judge her. Mostly I'm just very hurt. She has also been treating all my other friends who she keeps contact with like scum and it bothers me. Now what?
She does sound a bit rancid. But as you said, she had a fragmented home life and that's probably spilling out into her social life. You should definitely tell her how you feel. Let her know that she can be comfortable with you and that you're not going to judge her. She sounds like she's just lost her way a bit.
It is annoying that she insists that she's a model when she hasn't gotten anywhere, but it's probably one of her big dreams. Just try to be as supportive as possible.
When you talk to her, you should also let her know that it's hurting your feelings that she's not coming to you with things. Tell her that you don't understand why she's treating you differently and not telling you what's going on with her.
Good luck,
Darby(:
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a friggen 'bitch & moan' section..
where we can go let all our feelings out and complain about all the assholes on this site who try to bring you down and hurt your feelings for no goddamn reasonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!.
and sense this site doesnt have one..
ill bitch and moan right here :)
fuck all you fucking assholes who have no fucking lifes or nothing better to do than read peoples questions and fucking be jerks for no fucking reason!. youre so fucking pathetic and low its not even funny. i cant stand annoying FUCKKKKKKKKKKKSSSSSSSS. >:O
goodbye now:)
How did the mods approve this 'question'?
I'm sure no one is trying to bring you down. People on this site just call things as they see them as a third party member. If you ask a question, you have to expect honest answers. If you want to hear what you want to hear, go ask your MySpace friends questions.
I also doubt anyone is trying to be an 'annoying fuck'. If you received an answer that you feel should be reported, go to the left hand side of your screen, scroll down, and make a report in the 'Report Abuse' section.
Darby(:
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How do you become a fun person to hang out with? None of my friends are very fun to hang out with, so I'm afraid when I hang out with other people that I'm not fun. What makes a person fun to be around?
You have to be yourself. You can't change the way you act because you want people to think you're 'fun'. Fun is subjective anyway. Everyone has a different idea of what is fun and what isn't.
None of your friends have told you that you're not fun. If you weren't fun in their eyes, they probably wouldn't want to hang out. I'd say that since they hang out with you, they think you're fun to be with.
I don't think it's being 'fun' as much as it's not being annoying. Even though everyone has their different peeves. Just try to be yourself but be well-balanced. Don't freak out and scream all the time, but don't sit in the corner not saying a word. Be funny when it's appropriate and be serious when it's appropriate. Try to think of fun things to suggest to your friends (seeing a movie, going rollerskating, going swimming)
Other than that, you just have to be yourself and hang out with the people that want to hang out with you. Since you do have friends that hang out with you, they obviously have a reason for liking you. Why do you hang out with your friends that aren't fun to hang out with?
Darby(:
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Thanks I really aprciate your advice and opinions, its sort of comforting in a way to know that theres someone who completely gets it and understands.
Yeah dave said the exact same thing about the alchol breeding honesty,and how he has lost alot of respect for him for thinking like that,he also said he thinks he just wants to say he was with someone who wasnt easy.
hes going to talk to him(dean is his name btw i never mentioned) next time he sees him about the whole thing in a discrete way to see what he really is after, I told him not to make it obvious that I know hes doing it though if you get me have you any ideas on how he should go about it or what he should say?
I actually never thought about the whole premeditated friends thing..makes perfect sense now!
Im still in shock about all this really because not so long ago we were talking on MSN and he asked me was I still a virgin..and I said yep and proud he said thats good me too and he started going on about how im not like other skanks and stuff.
but then his attitude completetly changes,dave told me that he said to him that he wasnt a virgin,but he didnt know to believe him or not because some guys just lie about that to seem cool or whatever.
I feel kinda hurt and used in a way and I dont know why I keep wishing he wasnt like this,and making excuses for his behaviour..(having said that I know definately not to let my gaurd down)
I let myself get too excited I think because i thought he was different you know? the last guy I was with was the same now I feel stuck in a rut really like im never gonna find someone decent?
dave and my sister were saying how they cant understand why i have such bad luck with guys because apperntly im pretty kind caring fun etc(which i dont believe at all..)
that made me feel like there must be something wrong with me and that if im all that I wouldnt keep attracting the wrong ones.
Theres also the issure of the wedding..i was thinking I shouldnt go because i dont want to give him the satisfaction,dave said I should go with him and our other friend who was invited and make sure i look really good and just turn him down again..but im not sure..what do you think?
Thanks,cant say its easy but i try haha =]
thanks a million again for taking the time to read and respond to all this :)
I think Dave should try to be really up front with Dean. If he's like, "Yo, what do you really want with (insert your name here)?" Dean will definitely not think that you put him up to it. He would think Dave was just watching out and being protective of you. He doesn't have to be super aggressive, but just throwing it out there is probably the best method.
Yeah, guys are so confusing and it's hard to find good ones. But you're not cursed or anything. Every girl I know has the same problem as you. The two guys I dated before my current boyfriend were total jerks. I was glad when they buggered off. You just have to meet new people. Eventually, you'll find a great guy that appreciates who you are.
You should probably still go to the wedding since you said you would already. Wait to see what Dave finds out when he talks to him though. If he answers with something mean or is a jerk, just don't go with him and don't say why.
It's hard to get over people, but if you give yourself time, you'll meet a great person and you'll totally forget about the others.
Darby(:
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i dont have like bad breath. i brush my teeth everyday. and keep them cleaned. but me and my boyfriend got more into the whole kissing thing. and im always self cautious that my breath stinks. what are some things i can eat or drink to make my breath smell better? please help! thankyou
When you brush your teeth, rinse your mouth out with Listerine mouthwash. It leaves a refreshing taste. Also, try carrying mints with you and suck on one right before you go to hang out with your boyfriend. They taste good and they give you better breath.
Darby(:
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