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I am 14 years old, and i like a guy that goes to my school. He is going out with the biggist slut ever.. & I like him alot! Everyone thinks they are wrong for each other. I need a way to win him over. I donno what to do cuz me and the girl hate each other. He won't listen to any of his friends and i know he wont listen to me. We would be the best couple ever! So if you have any advice please feel free to give it!!

Im sorry if this isnt what you wanted to hear..but everyone has liked someone before who falls for the absolutely wrong person. Do you guys talk? If so..tell him "what do you see in her? everyone thinks we should go out..would you ever think about going out with me?" If he continues to show an interest in her..theres nothing you can do :( I wish we could just make a potion and make guys like us..if that were the case no girls would be single out there..and there would be no divorces..but it isnt reality ;/
Good luck with him..if he choses her over you..then let him. Hopefully he'll find out he made a mistake.
-meliss-

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Theres this guy online that wont leave me alone. He's so perverted and i have no idea who he is. hes not from my town but he always tells me that he sees me and he tells me what im wearing. hes always saying stuff like how much he wants to fuck me and he just says really nasty things. hes really violent too, like if i dont answer him RIGHT away he'll flip out and call me names, so im scared to block him or anything since he knows what i look like and he "sees me all the time" what should i dooo?

Honestly..i dont think he "sees you". Test him out..ask him exactly what you were wearing that day or the day before..ask him where you were..etc. If he doesnt give the right answer..dont worry because hes a fake. Simply block him and continue to block him if he keeps IMing you on a different sn. IF hes right when he answers your question..then you have a stalker which is DANGEROUS..contact police and tell your mom right away. Telling your mom might be a good idea anyway because hes harassing you..and if you give police his sn maybe they can do something? Well hopefully hes a fake..and all you will need to due is press the block button..
-melissa0

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well i have this friend and she is all nice and stuff around me...but when another person is around us shes different...for example today we went to abercrombie and i grabbed this shirt and she said she didnt like it...but then when my other friend came and said she liked it, she changed her mind...what should i do about it?

Some people are fake..and others are real.Your friend was being fake..and she needs to learn how to voice her true opinion. being that this is her problem..not yours..there isnt much to do. You could tell her "you know its funny how you didnt like that shirt..and all of a sudden when "insert girls name" came along..you liked it..so tell me ..did you really like it,or not? Dont be afraid to voice your opinion...its Ok to stand alone and to have different opinoons" Once you say something along those lines..its up to her to change. Good luck
-melissa-

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Well, me and my friend have been friends like forever. WE are bestfriends and our families are extremly close. Well, she has tried braking the relationship every month and 3 or 4 times a month. I am sick of it!! And starting to get sick of her fighting. She can be oh so nice and OH SO mean. We only fight online because she doesn't want to fight in person. I think she might want the relationship to end but I really don't know. She says she will always come back to me every time we fight but sometime I think she won't. I really don't want to lose her but maybe the next time we fight this may be the end to our relationship. I need some advice with that. She used to say how I get all the guys, and how I am not pretty, and also how I copy her, and junk but like I don't understnad her. I have tried not telling her more close things so if we do lose the relationship she won't really have anything to say to anyone about my secrets. But Like I need help on what to do with her.....

She sounds very moody..and i dont think you desserve to have fights picked with you for no reason. Definately take a break from her. I saw other people suggest just not talking online to her. Well if yyou do that are you really friends? If yuo dont talk online you will know that she will be thinking in her head how she wants to fight. Next time you fight suggest " i think we need a break from each other" one of my former closest frieds kind of drifted apart and took a break..(not due to fighting..but other issues) and now we are OK. Not best friends..but just OK. We talk in school..we are friendly..and to tel you the truth..its better that way due to the issues she has with drugs,etc. So maybe its best for you to just be friendly with her and thats IT for now...being that shes so moody. A struggling friendship is never fun..but its something everyone deals with at some point in their life..good luck with everything
-melissa

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i think my best friend is either bulemic or anorexic. she weighs about 119 pounds, wears a size 0 jeans and she constantly goes on about how shes fat. SHE IS NOT AT ALL. she graphs her weight on a chart (i saw it) and it's REALLY starting to scare me. what should i do? talk to somebody about it, talk to her...? please help!!

This is serious. your friend has a disorder and she needs help! if she doesnt get help the body will eat away at muscle tissue for fuel..thats when the likliness for heart problem inccreases. This isnt just about her looking way to skinny..its about doing perminent damage to your body. So the question..what can you do? Well maybe go on google.com or askjeeves. Print out a page about anorexia/bulemia and the signs..and the harm it can do. Show this to your friend. Alsp..print out a chart of height and the normal weight. Your friend will see first hand that shes underweight. If you talking to her and showin her the stuff you printed from the website doesnt help..its time to tell her mother..or your mother. Maybe if you tell your mom you can get her to tell her mom. Something has to be done and you will feel really good about yourself when she gets treatment. These disorders arent permenent! All she needs to do is get treatment and she will be ok again
-melissa-

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My mom broke up with my dad 9 years ago, and has been living with my stepdad since. I was on her computer, and found that she has been flirting with a guy from Texas (thousands of miles away), and they are planning on meeting in Seattle this weekend.

She hasn't told anyone about it, like me, my stepdad, ect. She said she was going to Seattle for a "craft get-together".

Should I be really upset, storm out, and demand to live with my dad? Or be happy for her that she is happy...and having an affair. I guess I'm still in shock.

I'm a 16 year old girl, and I'm not sure how to react. It was probably wrong to look on her computer, but I just had a hunch.

Your 16..and your not stupid. im almost 16 and i have found out secrets my parents were meaning to keep. Confront your mom..she shouldnt expect to keep it a secret forever. You have a right to be mad..because what shes doing is wrong. But on the other hand..being happy for her is goo too. Whatever your opinion is..i think you should tell her. Dont sit back and let her do this without confronting her..iy will drive you nuts. Perhaps if you confront her..you can talk her into breaking up with your stepdad..or breaking up with the other guy. When i found out something from my dad..i wasnt sure how to react either..but life likes to throw these curveballs at you..what you can do is to make the best out of this..example : try and be happy your mom is happy and to have a heart to heart talk with your mom.
-melissa-

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my boyfriend is really mean to me, he gets mad at everything, sometimes hes nice and sweet but then other times hes mean. like today i told him someone was trying to get wit me and he goes ok im like do you care? hes like no and i sad your a asshole and he said i know and then i said im gonna laugh when i die cuz the kid was really bothering me and wouldnt leave me alone and hes like punch him in the face. hes soo mean some times. how do i get him to be nicer?

He might have an anger problem. You can tell him how much it bothers you and how you want him to be nicer...but the only way he will be nicer is if he WANTS to. I wish i could make people do stuff..if that was the case..everyone would be going out with who they want. But..reality is you cant make someone go out with you..you cant make anyone do anything. So what i would dois..tell him serisouly to stop..or the relationship will have to end. If he truly cares for you..he will make an effort to change. If it doesnt get better..do yourself a favor and breakup with him sweetie...you dont desserve someone whos mean to you.
-meliss-

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how do i get rid of a sunburn on my lips?? or how long does it take to go away? (i got it friday, today is sunday)

Aw man i know how much that sux ( i just got back form florida and i had sunburn lips alomng with a pufft eye for a couple days because my sunburn was sever) Well my mom had me wear this sunblock stick that you can apply to your lips. Keep them moisturised at all times with a good lipgloss or chapstick. I had to apply mine several times a day so keep it in your pocket. It will go aaway in a few more days..dependin on how severe it is
-melissa-

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My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 months now and I'm feeling selfish lately. Yes, I know it's not good to be selfish in a relationship, but I'm selfish with attention. I always want his attention because I never get it at home. Like whenever he's playing guitar or something I'll just like mess with his guiatr till he stops playing... he says he thinks its cute? My sister is going away for college next year and everyone is paying attention to her, my parents even admit it. I got straight A's the other day and they never said congradulations.. considering that was the first time in my life to get straight A's it kind of hurt. So, you see my reasoning for wanting his attention alot. I've told him this and he said he understands and all, but I can't help but thing I annoy him sometimes. Lately I've said I love you and he'll say it back, but in a tone where he shouldn't of even said it at all... I don't know if what i'm doing is wrong, because I'm beginning to think that it is. I don't want to lose him because I need him really bad right now. Should I stop being selfish and let him do his own things and suck it up that I don't get attention? Or should I just keep the way I am...

-Signed
Sincerly,
Me

Not to worry..it seems at the 6 month mark there is always trouble. But you can overcome it. i would try my hardest to try and not annoy him..and give him space..this way you wont lose him. if he really loves you..he wont break up with you because he'll understand you need attention. you can get attention from him when you guys are hanging out and you can also give him space and let him do his own thing. i hope everything works out ok..dont worry-
-meliss-

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ok i have had this boyfriend for 3 months almost 4 months now. and you see everyone is like at 5 or 6th months you should have sex. but i dont want to. i mean i'm only 14. i love him alot. alot. alot. but i mean all we do now is really is talk and make out which is enough for me but i mean should i do other stuff? and everyone says that me and my boyfriend are gunna get married. we barly knew each other before we started going out and now were like best friends and always over each others houses. its great. but latly everyone is asking why we dont do stuff. hes kinda shy and i've never done anything like "that" before. sorry its soo long. but please what should i do?

What you should do is keep it up with your bf. A relationship with just talking..closness..and making out is great. No need for sex and that other junk..right now . You have sex when your ready..and tell all these people to mind their business! I hate those people who butt into others relationships and give their opinions and tell you what to do. That annoyed me..i would think it annoys you too right? Well people said (and a couple ppl still say im going to marry this one guy but we are history..) so i know the feeling you have for your guy. Dont listen to what the others are saying. Go at your pace. 6 months doesnt mean sex..neither does 1 year.
sex= when your ready.
Your so lucky your in a relationship thats special..enjoy every moment like i did with my special someone..because you never know when it will be over
-meliss

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my sisters know almost all my business. i tell them almost everything and there 11 and im 15. is it bad that they know about my personal stuff?

No way. Its pretty cool actually. I have 3 brothers who i cant talk to like that. I think its great you and your sisters have the special bond.
-meliss

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My boyfriend and i have been going out for about a month now. My best friend had no problem with him until now. She says she hates him. What can I do to fix that?

Could this be because shes feeling left out? have a heart tot heart talk with your best friend. Ask her " if i spent more time with you..would you not hate my bf? I tihnk maybe i have been neglecting you. So if we spent some more time together..would you not hate him?" Ask her to understand that you really like him..he makes you feel special..etc. Hopefully once you spend a little extra time with her..things will be ok.If not..then write back to me and i'll try and work up plan B.
Hopefully there wont be any need for plan B though. try that out and i hope it works!
-meliss

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breaking up with your boyfriend for his best friend...?

OR

still going out with him because he's a really good guy and you're afraid to break his heart...?

OR

what should I do, because my boyfriend is the most amazing guy ever, and he'd cry and be depressed for months if anything happened. But I just don't have feelings for him anymore, and his friend and I like eachother... help!

Its worse to stay with him. When he finds out you stayed with him just to not hurt him..it will make thins worse. Slowly break it to him and make saure you stay friends. I wouldnt go for his best friend quite yet if ur bf is the type of guy who would be really upset about your breakup..wait it out for a few weeks.
hope i helped

-melissa

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Hey well none of my parents are home and I have like really bad swollen glands, and I was wondering if like I could take an ibprofin or whatever they are called? (sorry I can't spell) Because they hurt and I can bearly move my neck and head.

Well im no doctor but thats what i take if im not feeling well. tylennol might help with the pain though. If your parents have a cell maybe call them? if not..id say go ahead and take the IBprofin..just dont take any other medicines with it because your not supposed to. Also..let your parents know what you took when they get home and tell them that your glands hurt. I hope you feel better
-meliss

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14/f...my friend told me that she was going away this weekend so i didnt invite her over..bu then i saw her profile on AIM and it said she was at her other friends house..so basically she lied to me and i now i dont know what to do..i am afraid to ask her about it..and i really dont want to..=/

I would be hurt and confused like you are if that happened to me. Dont jump to conclusions..maybe she made plans with her friend and her friend couldnt invite you too. Maybe your friend didnt want to hurt your feelings so she told a small lie. I would confront her and tell her you saw her message up. See what your friend says. Tell her its no big deal if she made plans with the other girl and the other girl couldnt have you over too..but let her know that from now on to just be honest..i think things will work out fine..if not write to my inbox and i'll be more than happy to help out more.
-melissa-

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ok my friend is really mad at me because we joke around and she took a joke personly so her mom called my mom and her mom told my mom wat i said.now im really in a bad situation /wat shud i do???should i joke around anymore???

sincerly,
xxmystary-girlxx

Its fine to joke around with friends..butt when they take it ersonally..thats when its time to stop. Like my friends joke with me and i joke with them..but if any of them took it personally..thats when i would stop. So i would apologize to your friend and make up..and not joke with her.
-melissa-

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I have a serious problem. I am a twenty one year old grown woman who can't make friends. I am happy with my husband to be and I love myself my dog and my family. I am a full time college student but I stay off campus. I just don't make friends easily. Never have. We just sort of fell into each other. I have no friends besides my fiancee. Can anyone suggest some hints or advice that can put in the direction of making some life long friends?

At college..maybe talk to a couple people in class. Gradual small talk can lead to a wonderful friendship if you ask "wanna catch a movie friday?" It all starts with that one question and before you know it...you'll have a group of girls and you can go out to the movies..partying..etc. Do you have any cousins your age on either side of the family? If so ask her to maybe invite some of her friends and maybe you and your husband can host a BBQ with beer and a campfire. Spark a convo there. Do you live in place where there is nightlife..clubs? If so go with your husband clubbing and maybe ypu'll find a couple there to make friedns with. Does your husband golf or bowl or anything? If he does ask him to have the guys bring their wives/gfs one time and you can get talking and hit it off there maybe. The biggest thing to remember is to be yourself.. and not to be timid or afraid when there are opportunities. All it takes is that one question "wana catch a movie" (for example) and soon you'll make it a routine to go out to the movies.
I hoep i helped..and i bet you'll do fine with making friends..just be yourself :)
-melissa-

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about 10 months ago, i moved house. i had this crush on a boy since i was in year 7, and now i'm in year 10. thing is, i still fancy this boy! i haven't seen him since i moved house, but i really miss him so much. i thought i'd forget about him when i moved house but i still think about him lots even though i haven't seen him for so long. i really want to see him again but i don't know how to get in touch, i don't know his phone number, i've searched on msn for him but i couldn't find him.. what else can i do? i can't move on and find another boy, there aren't any boys worth it where i live now, they're all really immature. i keep thinking about him and i miss him really badly. please help, thanks.

This is really sweet. I had someone who i really liked move on me..and i still like him. I know how it feels to have no contact with someone you cant stop thinking about. Ok go to askjeeves.com and type in his full name. Maybe try and find a webiste where you can find him. type in his name on the search engine and see what happens. If not..try and find a website with phone listings? Its worth a shot isnt it? Do you have anyone's phone number from your old school? If you do..call him/her and ask them to ask the boy his phone number/email/IM..anything! If you really cant find it anywhere.. call the school during school hours. You probably wont get through..but maybe talk to one of your teachers who you used to have..and who he has..and leave a message with your teacher for him to call you..email you..etc. This is a really sweet story and i hope you get in touch with him. Dont wait around or not do it..because you'll always be wondering what could have been between you.
I hope i helped
-melissa

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ok well,this is sorta a love life thing, but i dont know it has to do with singing. so i was alone after school in the gym and i was shooting hoops waiting for my boyfriend to pick me up and i didnt know my friend was behind me, so i started singing, and then i shot the ball and when it came back down and i got the rebound, i turned around and he was standing there, and i was like really embarrased, even though he said i was a terrific singer. the only person i can sing in front of is my boyfriend, who also says im a good singer. but i dont know, im really afraid to sing in front of people.

If you really want to be able to sing in public..the only way to correct it is to face your fear by singing in public. It will get easier as you do it more. But..its ok if you dont want to sing in front of people. Do you know how many people wont sing in front of others? A LOT and im one of them lol. Its ok if you want to only sing in the shower or in front of your bf..its sweet what your bf said and hes probably right! So go to a talent show and sing..or something in front of people if your serious about wanting to sing in front of people.
-meliss

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im totally falling for my bestfriend. i liked him at the beginning of the year, and because of that we became the good friends we are now. we do everything together. Like EVERYTHING. and now, im falling for him again. hes just, hes perfect.

I know how you feel.. i know someone whos absolutly perfect too. Dont make the mistake i made..i never told him how i felt. You should ask "do you ever see us more than just friends?" if you dont feel comfortable with that..get a friend to ask. I really think you should find out if he would ever go out with you..because if you dont..it will drive you crazy. You will keep wondering what could have happened between the two of you. i understand you dont want to ruin this great friendship..but what the two of you could have.. is love. And love is friendship set on fire. Even if the fire dies out..you will still have the friendship. Its a risk worth taking in my opinion.
Best of luck
-melissa-

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