I am friends with benefits (FWB) with an ex. I know - terrible idea, but I really had trouble letting go after we broke up. He just didn't have feelings for me. Aside from sex, we kiss, cuddle, speak on a daily basis, and spend a lot of time together. From the outside looking in, what we have greatly resembles a relationship.
My FWB is not a jealous person and has actually encouraged me to go out and start dating again - but I have been very hesitant because I do not want to end our relationship. I know that we can obviously just be friends with no physical intimacy, but it will certainly be different not being able to cuddle while we watch TV or kiss him or even just hold hands. I really don't want to let go, for fear that I'll never get our relationship back.
I have finally taken the first step in moving on and am going on a date soon. I don't plan on mentioning this to my FWB as of yet. My date seems like a really nice guy, but I don't want to give up my FWB relationship for someone I have just met. What are the guidelines for dating while I still have a FWB? Is it considered cheating after a first date?
Basically, what is/isn't okay? From my experience, most people are not considered exclusive after a first date, as they may be dating many people to try to figure out who is right for them. Is it wrong to continue my FWB relationship while starting to date? When do I stop? And if you believe I need to end my FWB relationship now, how do I go about doing it in a casual way, without sitting down for a "talk" or being dramatic about it?
Thank you!
There's a lot to be said here but I will start at your main question you have asked...
In my own personal opinion, I don't think it should be a problem with you having a FWB whilst dating. When dating, you are not making any kind of commitment to anyone (or your date). The whole purpose of the dating experience is to meet people and see if you connect. If you however take it to the next step and someone you have been dating is someone you like and decide you both want to become more (become boyfriend/girlfriend and in effect be together) then at that point you will need to put a stop to the FWB because it's at that point you would be cheating on the person you are with. When dating no one is ever limited to date just one person, I have known many who will have a few dates over a few weeks all of which had been planned out and this is nothing bad - as I said a date is nothing more than two people meeting, spending time together and learning about each other to see if they find each other interesting enough to want to go on a date again and learn more of each other. I would not say it is exclusive until both involved have said lets start seeing each other (become a couple).
However, having said this, remaining in a FWB with your ex I personally think is a bad idea. You are clinging onto a relationship that does not exist anymore to the point that even he is telling you to date but you are reluctant because you don't want to destroy this 'relationship' you have with your ex. This relationship is nothing more than a friendship with sex - and I would be willing to bet this is how your ex also sees it. Nothing more, otherwise he would not be encouraging you to date others. In short, I am saying that you are hanging onto a relationship that is one sided - you want something from it that he does not and in clinging onto that you are harming only yourself because you are not allowing yourself to move on.
As for mentioning to your dates about your FWB, I would say quite simply don't. You have no reason or obligation to do so - what you do is your business and not anyone else's.
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I went online and bought diet pills, I was told it was a trial and would only have to pay postage, after I paid postage I then saw that it was a membership and I would be billed in 30 days for about £70, I got in touch and told them I didn't want to continue this, that was ok, but when pills arrived it was for 60 not 30 as stated in the trial,(I was told they didn't have any bottles of the 30 pills left only the 60) I was told to send 30 to address in Cyprus, I then said this is going to cost a bit and really why should I pay for 60 when I only wanted 30.I have informed my credit card company to stop them taking any more money from my account. Anybody got any solution thank you
I had this exact same thing happen to me many years ago (but it was product from the USA) and you did the right thing by stopping any payments going out by contacting your bank. I had the exact problem where I had started to get charged for a bunch of tablets that I did not need or use. After calling the company responsible and going in circles with them I opted to contact my bank and explain the situation and ask them to immediately stop the company from any further charges to my account which they then did. I was then also advised by the lady I spoke to that I should cancel my card I made the payment with so they can't use that information in future and be issued with a new card, which they did right away for me (had to wait a week for the new card though).
Since you have already informed the credit card company you could try contact the company who sent the pills to you and try come to some kind of an agreement with them (they pay for the postage for you to return the pills) although personally why they would want 30 pills out of a bottle of 60 to be returned to them is a little shifty since they should ideally just be binned by them and not resold. You've also not said if they have actually charged you for the 60 already or not but if they have then trying to arrange something with them in terms of asking them to cover the postage is the best option I can see since they are the ones at fault for sending you something you didn't want and then wanting to charge you more for it.
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No one is giving me the support I want n it been so hard 2 me because I haven't tell anyone how I fell
What is it that you need help or support with? Please remember that there are always a lot of places or people you can turn to for help. If not here there are a lot of professional places you can also turn to who will listen and support you. If you are at school then your school should have someone who you can speak to (a counsellor) who will listen and try and help in any way possible. There are also a variety of institutions all around the world, whether you are in the UK, USA or elsewhere in the world, who will provide you with someone you can talk to in an anonymous manner which you will be able to look up on google for your country, state or town.
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I'm going to make this brief, yet informative as possible. This happened all around 2-3 years ago.
It all started when my mother passed away and we were left with her life insurance benefits. My dad, brother, and me each got around $141,000. At the time I was around 20 or 21 and to me it was quite a lot of money and wasn't sure what to do with it. I wanted to go back to school but my dad told me to wait. So he helped me and my brother set up a money market account with Citizens Bank that way it would sit there and build interest. I wanna say that he might of been the primary owner of the three accounts he set up and we were the secondary owners because we had the ability to withdraw and deposit money into the money market account. Plus I have a document stating that the life insurance was to be divided and entitled to the following beneficiaries correspondingly.
Later on he suggested the idea that we all chip in to pay off the mortgage of our house and that he would put all of our names on the deed. Some time has passed and I asked my dad when we were gonna follow up with it and told me he was getting the paperwork for it. So one day I checked my bank account and noticed my money market was empty and had been withdrawn and so has my brother's.
Basically my dad withdrew from me and my brother's money market accounts, ALL the money that was entitled to us, deposited onto his account and ended up paying off the mortgage himself and only putting his name on the deed of the house, not honoring the deal we all came to.
So I confronted my dad about it saying he didn't actually pay it off with his own money, the deed should have three of our names on it, but since he did not honor the deal then we should have our money refunded back to us but he won't do it.
So right now he is a different person from before and I believe he has intentions of selling the house we are all living in because all of us can't live together due to conflicting reasons. Unfortunately there is no contract of physical documentation about the deal being recorded, it was more of a "he said this" situation. Basically I've been lied to, stolen from, and cheated by my own dad which became heavily influenced by the large sum of money that was left to us.
What should I do? What can I do? Am I able to put a Lien on the house before he sells it? Or should I get a lawyer involved and attempt to sue him? Go to a debt collection agency? How do I go about this?
This is quite a tricky situation and although I am no expert at all in these matters (even less since it's not my own country) I strongly suggest you seek legal advice on what your options are in this matter. Also speak to your bank about the withdrawal and question it - ask them who authorised it and how your dad was able to empty the account without you and your brother being informed.
Also, looking at what you have said, you do have legal paperwork to show your brother and you were entitled to a sum of money when your mother passed away. That money was then yours, even after it was placed into the bank. In my opinion, even if your dad had the ability to withdraw the money from your accounts that does not make that money his (especially if he did so without your consent and your bank also failed to inform you of such a large transaction being conducted). You should have some kind of legal right in all of this to be able to get your money back since it was, in the most basic of terms, stolen from you. I strongly suggest you speak to a solicitor or lawyer as soon as you can.
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So I have really really low self-esteem to the point where when someone calls me pretty (which is very very rare) I never believe them. The only people that really compliment me are my parents and it's never about my face it's always about how curvy my body is, which is annoying. So basically growing up I've never thought I was pretty at all, my elementary school was kindergarten to grade 8 so I went to a school with the same judgemental people all my life. I remember in grade 3 this guy would always make fun of me and you know the saying "if someone makes fun of you they have a crush on you" but this wasn't the case it was flat out bullying. In grade 5 I remember this other guy said his brother said I looked like a man. In grade 6 I remember one of my best guy friends saying my lips were too big. That same year a boy finally had a crush on me but then this girl who I thought was my friend basically filled his head up with nonsense about me and made him dislike me. Fast forward to high school those same judgemental people now go to my high school. If you've read my previous questions you'd know I have this friend who is always talking about my appearance she's always making sly comments like in grade 9 she said that "you're so lucky you're not popular cause if you were I'd hear the boys saying you're so ugly", in grade 10 she told me she can imagine me with longer hair and makeup. Also that same year she had a boyfriend and my other friend made a joke saying that me, Chrissy and marissa were gonna steal her boyfriend and she said and I quote "I understand if marissa was gonna steal my boyfriend cause she's pretty" basically indicating that me and Chrissy were ugly. Also in grade 10 this boy had a crush on my friend and his friend made a joke saying that if he can't get with my friend he can get with me, he got so offended and repulsed he was like "chill....Let's not go that far". In grade 11 I was minding my own business talking to my friends when this boy just randomly called me "burst" which is slang for ugly. Then in summer school while I was walking past by these group of boys this one boy joked with his friend and said "hey that's your girl" and then he said "ew wtf man" and they all started laughing. I've never had a boyfriend my whole high school career or any guy friends either cause everyone at my school is superficial if you're pretty guys will automatically want to at least get to know you but if you're ugly like me you have to try talk to them yourselves and 8 times out of 10 if you're ugly then they won't really acknowledge you unless they wanna make everyone aware that you're ugly like that one guy did when I was minding my own business. Grade 12 just started so I don't know what it has in store but these are some of the factors that impacted my low self esteem it's so low that whenever an adult gives me a lecture on how I'm pretty I just bawl out and start crying because I know it's not true. Also if you've read up to here can you also give me tips on how to stop being so nice cause now everyone is taking advantage of me, like I'm so nice that one time a girl sneezed on my hand and I didn't say anything cause I didn't want her to feel bad.
I'd like to quote a Chinese philosopher who said, "Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it."
Read it again, and again and understand those words. Every person has their own opinion of what is pretty and what isn't and so some (childish) people say you are ugly but this is just their opinion (and lets not forget here you are dealing with childish immature people here) and just because they think this of you it doesn't make it true and nor does it mean everyone thinks this way.
I will tell you something honestly which has happen to me a number of times when I have been out with friends at a club or bar. I have had a couple of friends turn to each other and comment after seeing a couple say how could he/she be with that person they are so ugly and out of their partners league. This kind of narrow minded thinking always annoys me. And I usually have to explain that just because they think one of those persons is ugly it doesn't mean the person they are with thinks this way, the person they are with sees beauty in them that they clearly cant see.
I don't get many compliments at all on my looks (I actually can't recall the last time I had) and if I do it's always about how I have a great personality. But there are times I have looked in the mirror and thought to myself, "I'm not really that bad at all - so to hell with what people think!" I've always believed that there is no such thing as an ugly person. How a person looks is all down to perspective. One person can find someone attractive and another can find that same person not so attractive at all. This doesn't make them ugly it just means they are not attracted to them because they are not their preference (sometimes this comes down to something so minor as the colour of the persons eyes, their height, hair colour, their style of dressing or other things - the list is endless).
Ignore what these other kids are saying - they say all this stuff to make themselves feel like they are better than you or more important than you but reality is that they are not. Have some confidence in yourself - just try it. :) You'll see how much a difference it will make because when you have that confidence it shows like a glow around you to others around you and yes you will come across many opinionated and marrow minded people (especially at your age - this is just down to them being immature so is unavoidable) but you'll find not everyone is like this. Just have some confidence in yourself. As for how not to be so nice, there's nothing wrong with being nice (its a rare thing in my opinion in the world today) so be yourself and be nice but at the same time also be assertive too, show confidence in yourself so people know that they can't just take advantage of your kindness by walking all over you. You have a voice and that voice gives you all the power you could ever need to stop people from walking all over you - use it.
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Ok so I'm American, and my Scottish friends always use the word "aye". And I actually have no idea what it means, nor how to use it in a sentence. Can someone out there help me?
Aye is simply just a way of saying 'yes' that is used primarily in Scotland - it's just how they say yes. I can usually be caught saying it myself at times too and its meaning is no different to saying, 'yes'.
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So I'm a white European (family is from Italy) and I heard that dressing up as a culture or religion is racist. Mainly minority groups but I've heard some about certain countries. Basically I want to dress up like I'm from the rennisaunse or medieval times at Halloween and I'm wondering since it's apart of my culture would it be bad?
Hi. I'm not sure if I entirely understand your question so if I am wrong in this please do let me know. If I understand you correctly though I don't think dressing up like someone from a specific era would be a problem. I have seen many people dress up in medieval gear for fancy dress and Halloween parties and it's never been an issue. I don't think any of this can be classed as being racist. The best thing to do is use your own judgement on how you dress up. For example, dressing up like some dictator from history may not go down too well and neither would dressing up as some religious figure - all these things some people or groups of people may find racist or offensive so it's just best avoided. Simply dressing up like someone from some era (medieval, renaissance, stone age, ancient Rome or whatever) in my opinion isn't racist at all and shouldn't really be a problem. If you have doubts then check with someone, like family, to see what they think.
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I'm 23 I don't know what to do next.
Just over a year ago I had the copper coil fitted. About 3monrhs after every time I have a period I have the runs and can be rather bad, my periods have also become irregular again so buying Diarrhoea tablets is getting rather expensive. I never get period pains never have.
I'm not sure if this is something my coil is doing to me or it's a natural thing that's happening to me. Do I go back to the family planning clinic? I'm starting to get so frustrated with it all
This is something you should most certainly go to your family planning clinic about (or even your GP) and have a chat with them to make sure everything is okay. I've not heard of such issues with the coil but since this has started since you have had it fitted it would be safe to say the symptoms you speak of are related to the coil in some may. Best thing you can do is speak to them and see if they can give you an answer on what is going on because the side-effects you describe seem pretty strange (I couldn't find any similar side-effects that are associated with the coil) but this is something you should probably have checked out just to be on the safe side.
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I don't have a lot of friends andI know I should be grateful for the ones I do have but I feel alone. I don't have like a group of friends all my friends are from different groups. I used to have a group of friends but we're not really friends anymore but that's a story for another time. Anyways lets talk about the kinds of friends I have friend A is really judgemental and she's always called me ugly but with mixed signals I don't if she knows that I caught on but oh well but this is how she'd call me ugly in grade 8 she said that me and this guy would look cute together, the next day she said that same guy and this other girl would look cute together because they're both ugly. She just basically called me ugly without remembering what she said the day before. Grade 9 comes and she says "wow you're so lucky you're not popular cause I don't hear boys talk about you and say that you're super ugly" so she just called me ugly again. Grade 10 comes and she looks at me and says "wow I'm imagining how you'd look with makeup and longer hair you'd look really good" which indicates sheets 's still not happy with my appearance, grade 11 comes and my hair is finally longer and she says "see I told you, you'd look better with longer hair now all you need is makeup" indicating she's still not happy with how I look. Grade 12 just started and she's still bringing up I should wear makeup. I finally branched out in making new friends too so in grade 10 I became friends with friend B we clicked and hung out a lot in the summer until Halloween of grade 11 when she got a boyfriend and to this day she only talks to me about her boyfriend, doesn't invite me out anywhere unless her boyfriend comes, even when you tell her that you want a girls night he still finds a way to come. They're basically joined at the hip cause they're always together so of course I feel alone when I hangout with her cause now whenever I tell her my problems she relates it to her boyfriend, I'm friends with her boyfriend too but they're just annoying. Friend C only talks about her culture and makeup and whenever you bring something else up she says "stop its gonna make me depressed" in the summer she used to call me every single day and I'm not exaggerating whether I was out with family she would call, now she has a guy to talk to and now that's all she talks about, she's like friend B where if you bring something up she'll relate it to the guy. Friend D only talks about boys and again whenever you bring up something else she'll brush it off and talk about her problems but out of all these friends id probably have fun hanging out with friend D because this summer she was the only one that wanted to hangout with me. Friend A and I only talk in school, friend B was all about her boyfriend and I don't wanna hangout with friend C because she's too "classy" to take public transit. Her words not mine. I just want a friend where we can both talk about our problems equally, still be able to have inside jokes and we're not judgemental about each other, we wouldn't talk about the same thing 24/7 and we'd go places. With the friends I have now let me just tell you this now none of them really personally know anything about me I've known friend D the longest out of all of them and she didn't even know my family background till this year that's to tell you how self-centred my friends are but I could tell you so many facts about them. I've tried making more friends at my school but now that it's grade 12 cliques are already formed and I'm super shy I'm surprised I've made different friends but the ones I haven't mentioned are just acquaintances that don't want to be anything more than a school friend. What do I do what can I do to stop feeling lonely when I have friends? I have social media too but I also feel alone on there too cause no one interacts with me whenever I interact with them they just favourite my tweet and that's it. Please help and thank you if you've read up to this point and sorry if there are a lot of typos this was typed on my iPhone. I also tried joining clubs and so far everyone in the clubs are friends with each other already so they kind of automatically excluded me with out their knowledge
Hi. I do know what you mean in a way. I have a handful of friends who I love with all my heart but even being with them I can't help but still feel alone.
It sounds like you have out-matured your friends you have spoken about but also you may end up one day doing the same thing that a couple of them are now doing (being joined at the hip with their boyfriend for example). Unfortunately it does happen and has done with a number of my friends as well, I actually lost one of my best friends because her boyfriend made her choose between me or him. :/
I will say this much though, this friend that hints at you being ugly - this is one persons narrow opinion so don't let it get to you at all. Be yourself and be true to yourself and to who you are - it will be appreciated far more in the long term.
Making friends can be a simply step (as simple as saying hello to a stranger) but being friends at the level that you seek always takes time so try not to worry or rush this - it will happen in due time. I am far older than you and only recently can say I have the most amazing few friends who I trust with my life. A couple of years back I probably would not have been able to say that. Building a strong friendship takes time but this will all come in due time. Some people will enter your life and others will leave, this is just how things work out but don't worry - this kind of friendship you are looking for will come in time. As for joining clubs, this problem with them all already having their own circle of friends will always be a problem but try talking to them and let them see who you are as a person and you may find you fit in perfectly. It will take a bit of a time but you will be able to do it. :)
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My boyfriend asked me tonight if I was a virgin because he is and has never done anything at all. We've been dating on a couple weeks and I didn't know how to answer it though. This is why:
I've gave a few guys head
I've been fingered A LOT
I had anal twice
I masturbate like once a day
I never had like...sex sex, you know? Like the making babies kind LOL. You know what I mean. Does that mean I'm a virgin?
This really depends on your perspective. Strictly speaking a person is a virgin if their hymen is intact (if you take a look at Google you'll be able to find information on the hymen) which is a very thin membrane/layer found inside the vagina that, once broken during sex, shows a person is no longer a virgin. However, it should be noted that not every woman's hymen will be intact because activities such as cycling or running could be enough to rupture and tear the hymen - so although no sex was involved of any kind they would technically no longer be a virgin. This really doesn't make much sense so generally a virgin is someone who has not had sex sex (baby making kind of sex as you had put it). So I would personally say yes you are a virgin. What you would like to tell your boyfriend is really up to you though although it may be a good idea not to go into too much details about past exploits of what you have done and just leave it at something like you are a virgin but you have done a few other things before.
Hope this helps somewhat.
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i am 13, and i live with my adoptive parents. my real mom had me at 16 and got me token away when i was very young. i have always said that i would not be a teen mom, that i would wait for after marriage. but yesterday i found out that i am pregnant. how do i tell my parents? and i will not get an abortion and i don't want to give my baby away. so how will i tell my mom( that is 6 months pregnant) and dad that their 13 year old daughter is pregnant and wants to keep her baby?
How you want to tell them depends entirely on you and how your relationship with them is. If you are comfortable with talking to them then perhaps just sit them down and explain the situation. If you feel you wouldn't be able to talk to them you can opt to write a note for them to read to explain things. If you are more comfortable talking to your mom than you are to your dad then speak just to your mom alone first. If you feel you need some moral support when talking to them perhaps a close friend who knows about the situation can help by being there with you and helping you through it?
It's going to be a big shock for them but it's something you do need to let them know about as soon as possible. Also, how did you realise you are pregnant? If it was through a home test then could I suggest you take another test if you've not already done so, just to be sure and then when you do tell your parents get another test done through your family GP.
The decision to keep the baby is a decision that is yours to make and on this all I can say is just tell your parents how you feel about it because I get the impression this is something you feel quite strongly about.
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Hi there. I am a 29 year old woman. I have been with my husband for 5 years. Married for 3. He basically adopted my 7 year old daughter and I'm currently 32 weeks pregnant with our first child together.
Three weeks ago, he found out about a MFM threesome I had when I was 17. I did not want it to happen and did not enjoy it, I did say no, but they carried on and I let it. I didnt fight it off. I felt ashamed, disgusting, degraded. I still do 12 years down the line.
Thing is, my husband found out about it 3 weeks ago and he now says he hates me and wants to leave. He claims he is only staying until I show him the door (which I would never do). Now, I love this man with all my heart. He is my world and I feel I couldn't live without him by my side.
I have suffered from insecurity pretty much my entire adult life and even when I met my husband, I have never felt good enough for him. Never felt like I reach his standards. I have said awful things about him to other men in a bid to seek attention to make myself feel better. I have NEVER sexually cheated and never would. This man and these two children are my life.
MY husband is claiming I tricked him into marriage and having a baby (he knew I was ovulating and willingly participated in conceiving our son). He is saying that if he had known about my past when we met he would have never even had a relationship with me, let alone married me. I am seeking counseling and CBT to try help my behaviours and I KNOW that it will work.
My husband suffers from long term mental health problems: anxiety, depression and paranoia. He also suffers from long term physical health issues with his spine, liver and lungs. I have always been here and supported him through these. I do everything possible for him. I provide a lovely home and am a good mother.
He now says I'm a whore, that he hates me and that I'm a sociopath. He says he is miserable and will never love or trust me again. He says I have ruined his life and that he would never be able to forgive me for something that happened 12 years ago. He says once a whore always a whore. We have a baby due in 8 weeks. My daughter sees him as her dad (he has raised her from being just 2 years old), we are married and I completely adore him with every fibre of my being.
Has anyone else ever been in a situation somewhat similar and come out of the other side? Does none have any advice to offer because right now I'm on the verge of losing my husband and children's daddy. He has been reading other posts on this forum about similar subjects, but none of them involve marriage or children. What would you do in this situation? Is there a way back for us? I feel broken that an action from my past is destroying my future. There HAS to be something i/we can do?
Thank you.
There is a reason many people (couples) do not talk about their past and this is one of them. Personally I have no problem with talking about my past but this is because I have a firm belief that what has happen in someone's past happened in their past. If you had a threesome while you were seeing your husband and it was something you did behind his back then I would understand his reactions but this is something that happen to YOU and he has no right to judge you by it. No one does. You were young and made a mistake, something you say yourself is something you regret and everyone makes mistakes.
Your husband suffers from anxiety, depression and paranoia and this is probably what is playing a huge part in how he is feeling. Has your husband not slept with other women before you both had got together? Doesn't having done that also make him a whore? It may not have been a threesome but this is besides the point. He has no right to be judging you for what happen in your past to you and it should not have any reflection on who you are now - a mother and wife and I have no doubt you are a great mother and a great wife too.
Your husband should not let something like this - a silly mistake from your past, destroy what you both have. It would be a very big mistake and one he will go on to eventually regret greatly. As I said though, his anxiety, depression and paranoia are likely playing a huge part in how he is feeling. You should both try to speak to a family counsellor. It would greatly help your husband come to terms with this news about your past. Perhaps even him seeing a therapist to talk about how he is feeling about the whole thing would help greatly.
Regardless of what ANYONE may think of you for what happen in your past, it does NOT make you a whore. You were young and made mistakes - I have known people to make far worst decisions, including people I have been seeing in the past. However, I never let what they had done in their past (and sometimes we're talking things that happen with their ex's which were not even that far in their past) ever reflect on the person they are then.
With my situation we were not married and there are no kids involved but the situation was not far off from different but as I said, we both understood we can't judge each others pasts and we didn't. We managed to work past things. The fact that in your situation there is marriage that is involved as well as a children and a family I would think this would strengthen his resolve in wanting to just try get over what happen many years ago, long before you even met him and just get over it. Destroying everything he has over something so meager that should be left where it happen (in the past) is not worth it at all.
You mentioned you are already involved in counselling and this will hopefully be able to help you to put this bad event in your past to final rest. But this is something that your husband needs to try help you do and not use against you. I know I keep saying it but it's important that you believe it too... what happen to you does not make you a whore and it is not something anyone should ever judge you by. No one has any right to do that.
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26. Female
My cousin and my Aunt just helped me get my first place basicially it's a small camper trailer. They are even letting me decorate it the way tgat I want but I have never had the chance to decorate anything just the way I want. I have always had to agree with what someone else wanted like my 2number sisters when I was growing up or my 14 year old niece since my mom has custody of her and I have always lived with my mom. I need some iseas on how to decorate the kitchen bedroom and bathroom. My Aunt also said that I needed to make a list of household items that I would need because the family is going to get together and have a gousewarming at the 1stlibrary of the month to help me get ehat I need but I have no idea what those items are any help would be greatly appreciated.
Hi. Firstly congrats on a place you can call your own. :)
I'm not really sure on what I can say on how to decorate but since it is your place now, just have a think on how you want the place to look and let it take shape to what fits you and your style/personality. It can take time and you may end up changing stuff around here and there but it's what will make it unique to you. You can always have a look online and see some examples of interior decorating to see if you can pick up some ideas to use.
As for the list of household items you need, try stick to what will be importantbut it never hurts to add some nice luxury items as well although they can always be brought later. Things you might need can be electrical things (toaster, blender etc) or things like cutlery, dishes and glasses. Curtains, bedding, sheets, pillows - have a look and see what it is you need and put them on the list. Some of these things you may already have or can just get yourself especially if you want to get ones that look and fit more to your own personality (like bedding and curtains and such). So, it really just comes down to what you need at the place.
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Questions in the title! I recently had my second lobe piercings and want to get my cartilage pierced because I think it looks pretty but not too tacky.
I know people say it depends on your pain threshold-but could someone walk me through what it was like please? Particularly keen to hear from people who've had it done themselves. Do I get it done at Claire's with a gun? Surely if it was that bad for you they wouldn't offer it in the first place? Thanks! (I'm in the UK so Walmart does't exist or anything!)
I had my piercing done at Claire's and would also recommend them as the place to go especially as they are quite careful with how they do them.
I've not had my cartilage done (was something I had wanted to do but stuck with the lobe piercing instead for now) but it does hurt a little more than a lobe piercing because of the needle having to go through cartilage but it is for this reason you also have to leave the earring they do the piercing with in a lot longer (8 weeks I think) so the hole doesn't close. The good thing though, after speaking to everyone I know who has had it done, is that the pain from it does not last very long at all and some said that it didn't hurt at all and that their lobe piercing had hurt a lot more. It really does all depend on each person and their threshold of pain and just how their body is.
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I'm 16 years old, I had asked a question a few weeks ago because I was wondering if I could of been pregnant. I took a pregnancy test and it came back positive. I know sometimes the tests could be false, but I'm nauseous in the mornings, hungry all the time, and no sign of my period at all so I think the test is accurate. I don't know how to tell my parents, they're so strict..
I had a read of your previous question before answering this one just so I know what's going on. Firstly you may want to consider getting another pregnancy test done - it is always a good idea to double check. I have had friends who have gotten themselves in a panic thinking they might be pregnant and taken a test showing positive even when they actually were not pregnant. Try a second test to see what that comes up as. Or better yet (and I would urge you to do this anyway whether you do so after telling your parents or before will be up to you) but speak to your GP/Doctor to get a test - it will be a lot more accurate.
Stress can affect your period and if you have been under a lot of stress it could be why it is late.
Your parents may get angry or upset at the news but they will still be the most supportive people in your life to help you through this so letting them know about it soon will also help you even if doing so initially will not be easy. If you are having trouble talking to them then a note will be a great idea (as someone else already said in their comment you can arrange to go away for the night and leave the note for them to find). If you feel you actually want to talk to them then perhaps you may find it more comfortable to talk to your mom alone first? Perhaps even a different family member who you feel you are able to talk to more openly who can then come with you to your parents when you speak to them about it just to be there for moral support?
You will also need to decide on what you want to tell your boyfriend, if you haven't done so already. I will just hope that he will stick by you through it all if indeed you are pregnant.
Good luck.
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Hello!
As the headline says, im trying to be a better man, and being able to do some self defense is never bad idea. I heared that some martial arts are tied with some sort of philosophy and through it teaching other things for life then just "beating people" (because beating people is NOT my desire in the first place). I will be most grateful if you give me any suggestions i could follow.
Thank you!
To be honest many of the mainstream martial arts out there will be able to provide you with a way to not only get healthy and active but also provide you with self-confidence, self defence, patience and discipline. The best thing I can advise is to have a look to see what you have going on in your local area (karate, taikwondo, kung-fu, tai chi, kick boxing etc) and visit them to get some information and ask to sit in on a lesson or two so you can watch the class in action. This will give you a feel for the martial art to see if it's for you but more importantly it will give you the chance to see the instructor in action and see if the instructor is there to just teach a bunch of people half hearted ways to defend themselves and take their money or if they teach what you are looking for (self defence as well as a way to be able to better yourself as an individual and person). Don't be afraid to try out different martial arts since they all are different and all have their own benefits. The key will be to see if, once you start it, if you're comfortable with the classes. If you like the martial art but not the instructor then by all means see if there is a different school of the same martial art you can join/find in your area or somewhere close by. Unfortunately, nowadays doing a martial art is not that much different to buying something in a local supermarket. There's lots of brands to choose from and all at different prices and you will stick to one when you find a brand that you like better than the others.
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I am 32 weeks pregnant. I am dealing with a lot of stress right now due to the fact I'm pregnant by someone I'm not with. I know there are a lot of single mothers out there but I never through I would be one. & on top of that the guy I'm pregnant by I'm still in love with. when I got pregnant he told me it was gonna be okay we were gonna be a family & he's gonna be here for me. but I'm 8 MONTHS PREGNANT NOW & NOTHING has changed its only gotten worse. he's with someone else & SHES PREGNANT TOO, 5 months to be exact. he doesn't come to my appointments never has actually & he doesn't help me with anything. he doesn't even call me to make sure I'm okay.. it hurts because first I love him & I really thought things were going to work second he's having another baby!! & it's sad because he's there for her during her pregnancy but hasn't been here for me ONCE. my FIRST question how do I get through this? through this pain. I want to be OVER him & I want to be okay with everything even though it's not okay. I want to be stable for my baby boy.. I want him to have a strong mother to look up to. SECOND question, shouldn't he be going to my appointments, checking up on me, & making sure they baby is okay? ALSO helping me pay for the medical bills? because I have no insurance. is he wrong for not helping me??? please I need answers & advice! thank you..
Firstly, the stress is not only bad for you but also for the baby and your primary focus should be to look after yourself and your baby. I think it might be safe to say that many of the single mothers out there never thought they would be single mothers but unfortunately sometimes fate can deal a bit of a raw deal. All we can do is make the best of it. The fact this guy said he would stand by you and is now a father-to-be to yet another baby with another woman pretty much sums up where his loyalties lie and wherever that might be - they are not with you. This is obvious from the fact that he's not made any effort with you at all and instead is focused on this other woman. I think I feel sorry for this other woman as she either doesn't realise what kind of a man he is (he might be there for her and such but the baby you carry is his child too and he should take some level of responsibility for that).
First and foremost, I know you still love him but this seems like a man you will be better off without. He has pretty much done a lousy job of being there for you thus far and I suspect once this other woman has enough of him (or vice-versa) he will more than likely come running to you before/after which he will just move on to someone else because this is what he seems to have done so far.
It would be nice if things do work but at this moment in time you need to look at reality and from my perspective that is he will not be coming back to you and if he does you need to ask yourself do you really, REALLY want him back? How do you know he won't just go off with the next person that comes along? How do you know he hasn't done this to someone else before? I think his lack of any kind of interest says quite clearly he is not interested in being a part of your life. Do NOT assume for one moment that you have to have him in your life for the sake of the baby. You are a mother - you don't need him to have a stable and loving relationship with your baby. I know so many parents out there who are single parents and they have raised some amazing kids all through hard work, morals and loving care and they did it alone. You will be a strong mother your child can look up to.
It's easy for me to say all this and I can only imagine how hard it must be for you. The stress from everything is one thing but then with the pregnancy your emotions will be everywhere making things feel even worse. Just try and focus on yourself and your baby for now because you both are what are important.
As for medical bills and such I'm not sure where you are from but I assume it's from the US. I'm not sure how the laws work over there but I would hope they work similar to here where a person who has fathered a child doesn't just get to walk away without taking a level of responsibility. That includes financial responsibility too. I would say try and arrange to speak to someone who is familiar with these kind of matters where you are to get some legal guidance or advice on what you can do. Personally I think you have every right to make sure he pays his part in the whole affair. No man should be allowed to just father a child then walk away thinking they no longer have no responsibility for what they helped create.
Good luck.
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I'm sorry.
Sorry means you feel the pulse of other people's pain as well as your own, and saying it means you take a share of it. And so it binds us together, makes us trodden and sodden as one another. Sorry is a lot of things. It's a hole refilled. A debt repaid. Sorry is the wake of misdeed. It's the crippling ripple of consequence. Sorry is sadness, just as knowing is sadness. Sorry is sometimes self-pity. But Sorry, really, is not about you. It's theirs to take or leave.
Sorry means you leave yourself open, to embrace or to ridicule or to revenge. Sorry is a question that begs forgiveness, because the metronome of a good heart won't settle until things are set right and true. Sorry doesn't take things back, but it pushes things forward. It bridges the gap. Sorry is a sacrament. It's an offering. A gift.”
~C.S.
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Im so not fat ...and I never mention I have a eating disorder wow I seriously dont .......eating disorder? I im so healthy not skinny healthy but ..you know what I mean! I do workouts 3 times a week I eat fish mostly and veggies so im skinny thick .....if that's a thing
I understand what you mean, my apologies I think I had overlapped your message with that of someone else which is quite embarrassing. Sorry.
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Oh yea that makes so much sense but im so scrared..u know? This have been happening since 7th grade ...im afraid if my teacher tells my mother then ....do u think shell trust me? Like I really dont wanna see the reaction on her face ..but then if I placed her on my shoes then I would like my daughter to tell me whats going on..oh I see I get how that works...that's so hard I mean why type of questions will she make me answer? Ugh I dont want to think about it at all. What you think shell ask me? I so dont want to answer any questions
I think if anything they'll want to know what happen or what they did exactly. All you have to do is just tell them what happen and how frequently you are having to put up with it.
I'm not sure how your mom would react at all or what she might say but I would like to hope that she will be glad you were able to share it with her and go to her for help because one day if I have kids I would also hope that they would also come to me if they had a similar problem.
I won't lie to you by saying it will be easy but then sometimes doing the right thing is not always easy. I think it's important for you to personally do something about this especially with how bad and down it's making you feel. As for trust, I don't see why she wouldn't trust you especially since you have come forward to tell her. They may well deny it ever happened but the point here will be that you voice your objections on how you are being treated.
Also, the other things you should really try and get help with is the eating disorder you had mentioned as that can become really bad.
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