It's gross, especially when it's overt and/or persistant. I thought a relationship was meant to be between 2 people? Why do some couples try to get other people's attention? I noticed yesterday at the mall. There was this interracial couple all over each other, as we stood in line at this food place, and i'd focus on other things but they'd sometimes look back with this look on their face line they want their relationship to interest people, incite anger or jealousy, etc. it was awkward for me, directly behind them, and others in line. I have no problem with any couple, interracial, gay, lesbian, transgender, one young and one old, etc. I'm happy others can find love and be in relationships. I'm not jealous either, it's just uncomfortable to essentially be viewing foreplay without consent. There were children in line, too. Some people seem to get a sexual thrill out of people seeing their pda and that just seems sick and self centered. It makes me understand why there are countries that ban it.

You're correct - PDA can often be uncomfortable to see out in public, especially when its more than just holding hands or a peck on the lips.

If you feel like this was too much for children to see I think you can go about it two ways: you can kindly tell them yourself by explaining the situation and you don't want to be rude or disrespectful but there are children around and if they can be a little more considerate of those around them that would be better. Or you can notify mall security (or whoever is in charge in the future of wherever you'e at in public) which might be more inconvenient but might be the better route. That way you're not risking making a scene or causing embarrassment.

Good luck!


hi hope you can help me i'm a 15 year old male i'm a devout christian i love god with all my heart and i wanna be a better christian and devote my life to god i want to help people to get closer to god i wantto start to spread god's word i'm a bit nervous not sure where to start but i want to start talkinhg to people about god maybe start with people that i know not sure how do i go about it?

Thats great! I would definitely get in touch with one of the ministries in your church. I'm sure they have one focused in helping spread the word in shelters, prisons, rough neighborhoods or probably even the mall! You can even talk to your youth pastor and let him know how you feel and he can give you a better insight of how to go about it.

Good luck on getting the word out there!


So I had been a Wiccan for months, and my dad had the bad idea of it. That every Wiccan was a witch. That witches are evil. That the Horned God is associated with Satan because he has horns/antlers. I have never felt comfortable in Christianity, but felt comfortable in Wicca, like I was 100% safe and nothing would ever hurt me. I'll be turning 18 in a few months. Should I just light candles in my room, try to tell the Horned God that I'm sorry and that I'll move in with my friend when I turn 18 and become a Wiccan again?

Unfortunately when you're underaged and living in your parents' house, its their rules. Some stuff seems to make sense and some will never make sense to you and thats okay. Growing up and living on my own I've seen things my parents had and I can see why they did it and others I'm just like "That was their rules and its just not something I will enforce upon my children or myself, I view XYZ a different way..." and thats when you kind of grow into who YOU will be as an adult.

I think this is something that you'll have to respect your parents' wishes. If you want to do it behind closed doors, thats your call and if you don't feel guilty for and have a clear conscience with then I would say go for it. And then perhaps talk to your parents about it later on down the road and let them know THIS is what your beliefs are and this is who you want to be. They'll love you no matter what. I hope this helps, if you need anything else please let me know.


can kissing and fingering causes late periods



My father took everything of value and left us.
My mother is mentally ill and now has no insurance(so she's off her pills).
My sister is a major suck up to our mother(Favorite child).

Were stuck in an Extended Stay hotel and,its sucking up all the income we have.We have tried all "free" places for medicine and help.But our income is too high,but its not enough for us to live on.

I barely make $150 a week from my job and, its considered part time.I'm at my job all day from 10AM to 4PM and,they don't consider it full time.So because of the time and all the work,I can't get a 2nd job.We have no car,so we take the public city bus everywhere(which is $1.50 there and back per person).

My problem is my mother.She's always been an mental abuser and only to me.She says that "I'll never be anything","I'll never go to college,and even if I did I'd fail it","Ill never be anything in life,or have a husband let alone a boyfriend"... That was just this week.

She said that to me because I told her to "hold on one moment" while I was filling up water bottles,and she wanted me to look for a phone number for her.It only took 2 minutes and I couldn't look away or I'd have water on the floor.

My sister is a major suck up to our mother.She sides with her even when moms wrong.She won't stick up for anyone and can't even keep a job that long.she keeps calling out at work and lying to them about why.I tell her to quit it and I get screamed at by mom (mom encourages her to call out).

Right now I got no friends,because I don't have time.I got no other family to go to,and right now mother plans on leaving with my sister.They plan to go to grandma's and I can't come.she made that clear.Were all old enough to be on our own,but we weren't ever encouraged or pushed to go on our own.Our mother was one of those ones that did everything for you,even when you didn't want her to (tried getting her to stop,but that only made her mad and she'd guilt me into letting her).

So where do I go?Do I leave my job and beg my deadbeat dad to go,live with him in another state?
Or do I take my chances on the street?If I do that I lose everything I own.

I'm incredibly sorry that your mother has treated you this way for so long. Do you have a high school diploma/GED? If so, this is a good start to getting on your own two feet. A few options you have is:

1) Getting help from the state. I'm not sure what state you are from but some have options that can help you get food, housing, etc. See what you are eligible for (I would start with google!) and apply.

2) As far as housing goes, if you think starting off at your dad's is a good TEMPORARY place then start there. You know your dad and yourself better than me so be wise about this decision and if you think it's a good stepping stone--also look at his State and see what it can offer, if its cheaper, is there employment opportunities in that area, etc.

3) This is my fav (because I'm in it) but you can always try and join the military. Hopefully it doesn't sound scary to you but its always a good way to get on your feet, gain responsibility and learn a new job while traveling and getting a steady paycheck with benefits. Its not a crazy or scary lifestyle at all. I've been in the military for 8 years now and its been the best career choice I could have made. I grew up in a decent family but I saw myself living at home, going to college and living off of mommy and daddy for as long as I could. Joining at 17 made me independent and now I could never go back to living at home--I like my space and money too much!

If you have any questions or none of these options work for you, let me know and I'll rack my brain some more. Good luck to you! Stay strong.


will god forgive me and will I still go to heaven when I follow through with what I'm about to do. I figure if I'm going to loose everything I'm going to loose it on my terms. I am going to jail for driving under suspennsion and I,m on disability and I'll loose everything I'm already living my life in a wheelchair from a motorcycle accident. I already have my mind made up

My first instinct is to say "NO DON'T DO IT! ITS A SELFISH ACT AND CONSIDERED A SIN IF YOU ARE RELIGIOUS!" But after giving it some thought, I would like to change my answer to this: I really hope after you've given it some thought like you said you were going to do, you choose to not do so. My personal opinion is that God gives us the gift of life and yes, it is considered a sin.

I was diagnosed with Major Depression Recurrent at the beginning of this year. I would say for 10+ years I've been "battling" it or hiding it even from myself. While life is still rough for me, I feel like I have a sense of freedom now that I didn't have before. A lot of people commit suicide to finally be free from depression. I could ramble on, and on, and on about how to go about it and how much you're worth and ALL the good you would be giving up along with the bad. I just read an article the other day which summed up depression. You are not alone. I can't give an exact percentage or number to how many people in this world are battling the same thing you are but believe me, its more than you would think. Why don't you try getting some help first? I guarantee you, you would feel even a little better. I (along with everyone else) still have good days and bad days. You take it one step at a time. Some days I'm so pumped and motivated and others I just want to crawl in a shell and sleep for days because its the only way to make the pain go away. Its one day at a time. If you have any more questions please ask me. I'll leave you with this: 1-800-273-8255, National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Please use it if needed and I hope to talk to you later.


so i met this guy int he beginning of the year and hes graduated now. We had a thing for a while maybe a month or so but i cant help but to think i pushed him away because i might be afraid of my feelings. after a few weeks have passed we stopped talking and he eventually got a new girlfriend but he kept staring at me waiting for something to happen and he does this all the time. i tried talking to him on facebook but he didnt message me back so i just gave up and thought maybe this is when i need to give him some space or would it be better if i talked to him in person or is it just no use at all?

Since he now has a girlfriend, I would say its best to just leave the situation alone. Maybe when you catch him staring you can just wave an smile to show that you still would like to be friends but thats probably as far as it will go at this point. And if thats not really what you want thats fine too.


There this guy I like and I feel like he likes me too but not sure. He would ask me what time and I'm leaving work and said he wishes he could leave with me. Then he was gone for a wile because he got really sick but when he came back he asked if I missed him. He always sings love songs when walking by me randomly and he always smiles and looks at me so I think he likes me but I'm scared about asking him out. I am friends with one of his friends and thought maybe I could ask him about my crush's situation. What do you think?

I don't know how old you are but if you do feel more comfortable asking his friend about your crush I'd say go for it! Chances are your friend would relay the message and things may go in the direction you want it to. You could always talk to your crush directly but thats always easier said than done if you're a shy person.


I am 23f my sister is 19f. She is in her 2nd year at college and is feeling lost. She has been having a hard time balancing her classes. And Tell me she feels like giving up and maybe trying again later. She says she doesn't feel interested in school, or anything, not even parties for that matter. I will support her in any decision she makes. But I don't know what to do either. How can I help her? What suggestions should I make?

The fact that she's not really into parties or social gatherings makes it sound like depression might be the case. If she was just feeling "lost" in academics I would say she sounds more confused on what she wants to study or get a degree in but I think its more of the former.

Perhaps she should see a doctor to get a professional's opinion. I was recently diagnosed with depression, I was feeling the same way. I'm so glad I went to see a doctor even though I was really hesitant. Its been kind of a struggle but I'm starting to get back into things I was once interested in and then lost for awhile.

I wish your sister the best of luck :)


So what can it possibly mean that my ex keeps checking each and every snapchat story update I have?

It honestly can mean anything or nothing at all. He can either be checking up on you in the sense that he's not over you, or he can be checking up on you to see who is "winning the breakup" (who has moved on first). Or he could just have a lot of time on his hands and he's nosey!

If this is the only interaction you're having with him without actually talking, texting, seeing him, then I wouldn't make any assumptions.


okay, so, its going to be summer vacation soon. And I just wanted some advice on how to get a little slimmer. Now, I'm only 13, so i don't want any super heavy exercises. I just want to slim down. because, actually, I'm really over weight. I'm about 5'' feet, and despite my age, i weigh 150 lbs. Although, I don't really look that fat. I just look chubby. i want get a slimmer body, but I still want to keep my round baby shaped face.

Any ideas on how to get slimmer and lighter in 2 months please?

A good friend once told me "Weight loss comes from the kitchen, fitness comes from the gym" and I believe that! I'm in no way the best shape ever and am currently struggling through my own issues with weight but I can give you some tips that have helped me out along the way!

- Eat breakfast! I'm sure we'd be rich if we all got a dime anytime we've heard that but its true. Drink a glass of water when you first wake up as well, this will help with hunger.

- PACK SNACKS WHEREVER YOU GO. This has been a huge one for me. It saves you from the temptation of eating out or hitting the drive thru. Pack some berries or cheese/crackers, some turkey, granola bars, anything. They may not be the best for you but thats better than having a double cheeseburger staring at you on a menu, just waiting for you to say "Can I get a number 2 with a coke?"

- Bring water with you everywhere you go. This goes with the previous tip, don't be tempted to grab a soda or juice at the mini mart. You can get bottles that stay insulated if you're like me and hate room temperature water.

- Make a kick ass playlist and use it! Whether you like running, power walking, walking the dog, just go out and use it. Also, join an app like RunKeeper or Map My Run. This will help you with your fitness game, log in your workouts and its really motivating to see your miles, minutes and calories add up of what you've been doing!

- Eat your veggies and eat them often. This is my biggest struggle. I love fruits and veggies but I can't seem to stick with a consistent amount of veggies daily. Oh! And I'll give you one of my fav smoothies: 1 apple, 1 banana, 1 orange, handful of kale & ice. I drink this in the morning for breakfast or sometimes when i just want a snack to cool off.

And then the obvious, portion control, snack throughout the day to avoid binge eating due to hunger pangs, etc. Good luck, girl!


Hi! 22 F

So my mom keeps telling me i need to use something to clean my face. I have really good skin i have never broken out before... Once when i used a cream from origins and after that i was like screw this.. I never ever wash my face i never take my make up off. So i figured i would use something in the shower? Does anybody have any suggestions

Neutrogena has a lot of good products ranging from different skin types to specific problems you're trying to tackle. And you can easily just leave in your shower and use as part of your shower routine. I also like Cetaphil which is really gentle and amazing!


whats a nickname for my name kayla .?

Kay, K, Lala, KK.


so me and my boyfriend are I guess sexualy active...I mean he hasn't penetrated so I guess it doesn't count its mostly fore play and making out any way its heating up and you see im a virgin.. I want to have sexs with him but im afraid of pain and I know fore play makes it hurt less and I know I have to communicate with him but im realy shy

I've been in your situation before, where being shy was an issue for communicating. You may not like my answer but if you're that shy around your boyfriend, maybe you should just stick with how things are now until you're more comfortable with him to express your feelings. I'm SUCH a shy person but trust me, if you both are serious about each other you will eventually feel comfortable around him enough to tell him what you want and need. Stick to the "oral stuff and hand stuff" until you've gotten over being shy.

Also, if you really are set on taking the next step just remember it probably will hurt more than not. My first time, we couldn't even finish because it hurt so bad so we had to go a different route... But I was sooo comfortable with him and we dated for awhile that it wasn't embarrassing and I made it clear I was a virgin so he knew what to expect. It took a few times before I enjoyed it. I'm telling you that because sometimes if you build enough trust and communication and it'll pay off in the end. It will also be a better and memorable experience.


I'm moving to singapore next year from the philippines, and I have no idea how things will go, like, I'll be attending college there and do they discriminate foreigners? And with the china-philippines conflict going on and almost 70% who live in sin. are chinese, would this affect our stay? I have tons of other questions but I would greatly appreciate if you share some of your experiences there :)

Hi! I may not be much help with the conflict situation but I've been to Singapore twice and I love it there! I'm from the U.S. and once went on deployment there and the other time I flew there to meet a friend. I've gone to a few different countries (including the Philippines!) and Singapore was so interesting and beautiful! I had never flown to a country by myself and my first experience in Singapore made me comfortable enough to fly, land and make my way around the country alone in order to see my friend. I didn't do too much sight seeing but I did a lot of shopping and took the train system (very awesome!) and just got off on different stops and explored Singapore! To answer your question if they discriminate foreigners, I didn't get that vibe at all.


The last two months I have gotten my period on the 16. I've had it for a year now. But the 16 of June I will be 15 hours away from home for 5 days at a church camp. Not to mention, it's on the beach. Is there any way I can induce my period or delay it without any birth control or hormones? Also, I use tampons. I sleep with pads. I'm going to be sharing a bed and even with over night pads I leak sometimes. I'm very anxious about this, especially the car rides, sleeping, disposal of pads and tampons, swimming, and everything else!

I don't know of any way to delay or induce without birth control pill. I know they say a lot of stress or change of environment can change your cycle but this isn't definite, it all depends on your body. When I was in Basic Training some girls didn't get their period because of both factors (stress and change). With that being said, I would just like to remind you that (with the assumption) you will be around a bunch of girls... you will all be in the same boat or they at least know how you are feeling! Don't be afraid to say you need a bathroom break its completely normal. I would say thats the important thing because that will help you avoid leaking or feeling uncomfortable or extra paranoid. I don't know about you but sometimes when I'm with my girl friends and we're out I'll ask one that I feel super comfortable with to "check me" to make sure I'm good and haven't gone through. I think that takes a certain level of openness and being comfortable so if you have that one friend, use her!


i have been confused about what i should be, i am a female that is more comfortable dressing in male clothes, i act more masculine then i do feminine however i do have certain female traits that keeping coming out (maternal - from when i was a step mum). i have been reading up and considering going through with a sex change operation. the only thing that is holding me back is i want kids and want to be able to conceive naturally.

Hey! This is really tough to give advice on and after thinking about what to say, all I can come up with is "Do whatever makes you happy!" It seems like right now you have the best of both worlds: you can appear how you're most comfortable with and what makes you happy AND you can still do what you want to do, which is conceive naturally. If you go through with an entire sex change, the latter will be out of the question. In my honest opinion if you're in the middle and hesitant, I would say don't do anything drastic. I've never looked into the process of gender changes and if/how they're are reversible but I would imagine if it was, it would cost money and a lot of time for your body to transition. Stay with how you are now, dress in what makes you happy but if having kids naturally later on down the road is what you want, you don't want to give that up just yet.

Good luck and just remember your happiness is what matters the most!


So I had a boyfriend and I told him that I did not want to have sex because I want to wait and im a Christian. So he said okay, but then preceded to pressure me into doing other things such as bjs, hjs, fingering, etc amd they were things i really didnt want to do, told him i didnt want him to do but hed take out his take and be like please just touch it and please just finish for me and put your mouth on it and id really hate it and didnt want to but i did. Hed also tell me like dont you love me? Cause by you not wanting to have sex with me and all that its like saying you dont love me. And he just pressured me into doing all those things. And one day, and please dont judge me cause its so embarassing and I hate to think that it happened but he pressured me into having..anal. And told me at first it wouldnt mean me losing my virginity and i said i really really dont want to and that its weird and he begged and begged and begged and wouldnt let me put my clothes back on and told me just once and we didnt have to do it again and itd make him really happy and its a normal thing and eventually i broke and was like okay once and no more. And he did one thrust and i told him to pull out and he just pushed deeper in and say you just need to give it a chance and i scratched him trying to get him out of me. And before he had also forced me to show him my ass and i really didnt want to and hed try to flip me over and id struggle against him and even said rape rape and hes like its not rape unless im inside you silly. And idk. Is what he did rape? Or sexual harassment? Or what? My friend thinks its both. And im just angry at it all. I mean i blame myself for not just breaking the relationship off but i was fooled into believe everything we did was normal and sure maybe but we had only been together for like two weeks before i had to start giving hjs and ugh:( and i even knew what i was doing didnt feel right..afterwards id feel like sobbing cause i felt like i was just being used for sex and being dooped like every other 16 year old girl whos tricked into believing their 17 year old bf loves them. And ah:( so what is this called? Rape? Harassment? Being forced or constantly persuaded and begged into doing something i really didnt want to do..and then doing it and feeling awful? And if he ever finds this post by some chance, fuck you:(

I may not be much of help but felt the need to answer anyways. One of my side jobs in the military is helping victims/survivors figure out what to do when they are put in an unwanted situation like this. I would consider this as sexual assault. Its more of a broad term but what he was getting you to do was unwanted and you may have consented but I personally feel he was abusing his \"boyfriend\" role. Additionally, the second you say stop during the act and the person does not stop, it is considered rape.

Your options are going to the police but sometimes they\'re a little insensitive about things like that. You can also go to a medical center to get an exam done. If all you did was anal, chances are you\'re not pregnant but with everything else he wanted I would say this definitely wouldn\'t hurt. Some states have a law where they are required to report any rape situations to the police, known as \"mandatory reporting states\".

For the military we have our own hotline but I googled a civilian equivalent and this is what I came up with https://www.rainn.org/get-help/national-sexual-assault-hotline they may be able to give more advice on how to handle it and tell you your options and what you want to have happen. Good luck and keep your chin up!


So, I'm a 14 year old girl and I honestly can't cope with the way my parents tell me to live, I feel like I am trapped in my home and I can't do anything!
They have these rules that I cannot go on my iPad/phone until 8pm every night, even at weekends I'm not aloud to use them. They say I'm to antisocial and I need to get out more, I go almost everywhere with them! I do go to town with friends aswell. They won't let me out of my town, I live in Barnstaple, devon and I'm not even aloud to Exeter or Bristol to go on a shopping trip with friends which is only about 2 hours away. Also I'm not aloud to be friends with a few people I know, one of them because there is a rumour going around that her mum is a prostitute and the other one who is my best friend and I still hang out with her secretly because she said something rude on Facebook like 2 years ago! It annoys me how I can't be friends with who I want to be friends with. My parents won't let me go out after school and I always have to be back home at 4pm if I go anywhere, which means I can't go out in the evening or at night and have a laugh :(
They also won't let me use social networks other than Facebook and Twitter, I want to be able to use snapchat, Instagram and tumblr but I'm not aloud to have it on my phone, another thing is that my dad still reads my texts and my messages with friends online!!! I'm 14 and I literally have no privacy! It's really annoying I want to just tell him "no, I won't give you my phone" or just not tell him the lock to my phone but he always makes me! :(
This is really annoying me now how I feel like I am stuck with nothing to do and no privacy at all :(
Anyone know what I could do?

I\'m sorry to hear what you\'re going through :( to an extend my parents were like this as well when I was growing up. I got a little privacy and I always made sure not to take advantage of that which meant maintaining or earning more privacy. Even in private, I still had integrity because I knew if they caught me in some shit I would lose their trust and be miserable. But at the same time, I had to be home by a certain time (until I started driving) and I hardly went out with friends, which was mainly my own decision because I knew some of them weren\'t a good influence so I steered clear at times.

The best thing I can tell you at this point is to talk to your parents and ask them what you have to do in order to get some privacy. Maybe have friends come over to your house so your parents can see that they\'re not bad kids you just want to have fun. Either have a pizza/movie night or go to the movies and invite them to stay over or something.

I can easily tell you, normally kids in your situation tend to rebel once they reach 18 or move out on their own which is never good. I don\'t think your parents understand that and its hard to tell them without having them freak out any more than they already are. I would definitely express that you want to make them happy and you don\'t want to let them down because you know they just want what\'s best for you. But at the same time you\'re growing up and need to learn to live life. I know you\'re only 14 but maybe start looking for jobs or see where you want to start applying to when you reach the age of work. Good luck!


I am 19 female and i have a boyfriend of a year and 3 months. i have always seemed to mention things like "you wouldnt ever cheat on me right?" and a bunch of other annoying things. he has yet to prove me wrong, so i dont know why i keep on feeling this way. i am constantly worrying and wondering what he is doing when we arent togethor. one of the reasons i think i am like this is because i know he loves to have sex with me a lot and is a very horny kind of guy so it makes me extremely nervous that when we dont see eachother for a couple of days, he will do something behind my back. i know he loves me and truly does care for me and wants to see me happy and cant stand to see me upset. so part of me thinks he wouldnt do such a thing. but the other part of me is so full of anxiety and worries that he is doing stuff behind my back..because i know one of his good friends has had a girlfriend for a year also that he claims to be in love with but then my boyfriend told me that when the girlfriend has her period, he cheats on her. that is extremely messed up and i cant bear the idea of my boyfriend doing that to me. it breaks my heart. i also feel like ive seen and heard of people cheating everywhere..media, friends, etc. so why would it stop him? when i was in 6th grade apparently my dad cheated on my mom and that is why they got a divorce, i didnt find out that reason until 2 years ago. but i wonder if thats also why i am so scared. this is getting overwhelming. i know my boyfriend is getting fed up with me acting this way.

I have gone through this before. Its so easy to look around you and point out all the reasons why you shouldn't trust a guy. With all the unfaithfulness going on around you, its really hard to have hope. I have addressed my issues to numerous amounts of people and they all say the same thing "Do you think *boyfriend* would do that to you?" and I stop and take a look at how my boyfriend treats me compared to the guys that claim they are "in love" with their girlfriends. I think about how often we see each other and his level of commitment to me.

If you can sit here and evaluate all of that in your life and still say that you have a good boyfriend, you have to have faith. Otherwise it won't work... it just won't. Love is such a complicated emotion. Its probably the most complicated I have felt. Its all about taking chances, thats it. And you have to give it your all. That way if it doesn't work out, you can honestly tell yourself "I gave it my best. I gave it my all. It just didn't work out." versus "I wish I could have done X, Y, Z better". Always remember, no relationship is the same but for the most part someone has once been in your shoes--whatever case that may be. Strive to have a good relationship, get to know each other and support each other.

Good luck! If you have any more questions on the topic, feel free to ask. Like I said, I've been there before.


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