"People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone." - Audrey Hepburn
I came to this site for advice about a man and love. That very question turned my entire world around and I have had my eyes opened to things I never noticed before.
I've stayed here so that I can share the knowledge I do have. I know I'm not changing the world but I do hope that I spark others to open their eyes.
"The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself." - Oscar Wilde
So, if you learn something from what I say then repeat it to someone else who can use it.
I hope that if you see an answer of mine that you enjoy it will inspire you to go out of your way to give good, solid information. Provide links for further information, detail your responses, encourage people to seek out professionals when it's needed, and stop sugar-coating responses and just say the truth.
I hope that even if you absolutely hate my answer that it'll kick start your brain. Hopefully you'll begin taking your time to respond instead of hurried answers that are useless to an already confused person.
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost
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Age: 24
Member Since: October 12, 2007
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Last Update: August 15, 2011
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How many eggs are there in a girls ovaries when she's born? (link)
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This old Advicenators question might be of some help:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=542663
"According to:
http://www.healthology.com/focus_article.asp?f=fertility&c=fert_drugs#Introduction
"Women are born with a finite number of eggs. At birth, a woman has around 1 to 2 million eggs. However, throughout her life, a woman loses eggs through a destructive process called atresia. At puberty, only around 400,000 eggs remain. Throughout the reproductive life span, from puberty until menopause, women lose about 1,000 eggs each month. Of these thousand eggs, only one is released. Once released, it is picked up by the fallopian tube. If a couple has sexual intercourse around this time, fertilization (the joining of the egg and sperm) may take place."
So, actually, we're born with one or two million eggs in our ovaries. When we go through menopause that simple means we have used those eggs up and there is nothing left to be fertilized. Some women begin menstruation earlier than others just like some women go through menopause earlier than others.
It is pretty neat to find out that we lose a whole bunch of eggs between birth and our first menstruation though."
& You might want to read the question there too, as it has a few little details about average menstrual cycle age and whatnot.
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I have my first ever appointment coming up.
Can someone just walk me through a typical appointment? What should I expect? (link)
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A papsmear is usually an annual thing for all women. It's best to start having the tests when you begin having periods but most women tend to wait until they become sexually active.
Pap smears can be incredibly uncomfortable. Some women experience pain while others go through it like a breeze. It really depends to on the person and how skilled the doctor is.
In my personal experience, they are extremely uncomfortable and I have been known to cry during the procedure. I know that it's something I need to do each year to make sure that I am healthy so I continue with my check-ups. The procedure doesn't last very long at all and ensures that everything is working properly and is healthy so I endure it.
In short, the doctor will take a urine sample from you first to run a pregnancy test, usually. After taking your blood pressure and asking you a few questions regarding your sexual status (be honest, they've heard it all and are not allowed to inform anybody else of the information you provide them).
They then usually send you to a clean room to completely undress and lay on a table. The table has foot rests for your heels. You will be instructed to position yourself in a manner that is helpful for the doctor to work at. They will let you know how to lay and such. You may feel uncomfortable and embarrassed at this time but it is fairly normal and the doctor has seen plenty of naked bodies.
Your doctor may do a breast exam on you to begin with. He/she may also listen to your heart and lungs and press on your body and ask if you feel any pain anywhere. The doctor will then simply look at your vaginal area for signs of infections or visible STDs after switching on a very large, bright light at your vaginal area and gloving up. They may ask a couple of questions while doing this.
The doctor then will separate the walls of the vagina with a speculum. The speculum is a slender metal (or plastic in some cases) instrument that looks somewhat like a duckbill. It may be warmed or lubricated before being gently inserted into your vagina. With the speculum in place, they can visibly see your cervix.
Your clinician will then insert a special swab, brush, or stick to wipe off cells from inside the opening of the cervix and from the outer part of the cervix. The cervix can be very tender and this scraping can cause some bleeding and discomfort. It is not unheard of for this scraping to cause your legs to twitch.
The doctor will next place two gloved fingers into your vagina while their other hand gently presses on your lower abdomen. This identifies the size, shape, and position of your uterus, fallopian tubes and ovaries. It can also let them know if you have any masses growing or any abnormalities.
The doctor may also do a rectal exam at the end of this procedure. Not all doctor's do this but it is no big deal either. They simply slide a finger or two into your anus to feel for masses and to check the back of your uterus.
The more you relax, the smoother things will go. It's okay to ask questions throughout the entire thing and your doctor already knows you are nervous so they are prepared for all sorts of things. If something is painful, it completely acceptable to inform the doctor about it.
I hope the doctor's appointment goes well and you are healthy. If you have any more questions, please feel free to ask me! :)
P.S. Skip the "HPV vaccine" unless you have or have had multiple partners (or your partner has had multiple partners or has been unfaithful, of course). It only helps to prevent 4 out of over 100 strains of HPV and the possibility of death kind of outweighs that for me, personally. Here is some more on it: http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=566368
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It started almost three years ago. I went to the doctors for an itchy problem that was not going away. As it turned out, I had trich. The doctor stated someone has been messing around. I asked him that my husbands ex had it in 1993, was it possible it had stayed dormant before it infected me? He didn"t answer. Then last Oct, I had a pap smear, it came normal, with the HPV virus too. I was terrified! Since vfinding this oput, I've lost interest in sex. I"m too afraid of catching anything. Since Oct, we have had sex 5 times. Am I wrong to feel this way? (link)
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You are going to ruin your marriage if you continue this. Denying him sex may end up making him feel worthless or that this problem cannot be resolved and that he should leave. Seriously, this is how marriages fall completely apart.
Sit down and talk to your spouse about this. He is not going to take it happily but will probably be relieved that you actually have a real reason as to why you haven't been sexually intimate with him for so long. Be smart...do not suggest that he has been unfaithful but, rather, that his former partner had been and that you are concerned for his health as well as yours (and you should be! He should be important to you!).
Then see if he will agree to a FULL STD test. Who would have thought, right?! Request, specifically, that certain things be tested for during it. Ask for a list of things they will be testing for usually and then give them a list of things you want to be added to that test. No STD test is 100% complete so you do have to do some work here. You should also have this test done at the exact same time.
[I wanted to also add that "if he loves you he will take the STD test" is no right. He may be emotionally damaged from you not talking to him about this for so long he may end up be shocked by your sudden request and say no to it at first. Keep in mind that if this man has been with you for more than 6 months and you've only had sex 5 times...and he hasn't left you for some loose woman...he sure as hell loves you. Men are sexually driven by hormones...those hormones have not gone away...we all know he's been wanting "it" and if he's remained faithful then there is a great amount of love there from him.]
If you both have something then from there you can actually be treated for it rather than running away scared. If either of you have an STD that is still running around in the body and has been for this long then, chances are, you are in pretty rough health. Do whatever needs to be done.
Calm down, relax, and get over it. If he ends up having a life-long disease then it's up to you to decide if the marriage can be saved but this behavior simply cannot go on while leading a happy life together. Talk with him! If it turns out that you simply cannot get yourself over this enough to be intimate then he needs to know so that you two can figure out what to do from there.
Go to therapy sessions together if you must after the STD testing comes back and you still cannot bring yourself to be intimate. Do whatever it takes to save your marriage. This is your life-long partner. You made vows to him that you would love and cherish him through thick and thin. This is the thinning of this marriage...start opening the lines of communication so you two won't wind up in divorce in a few months. SERIOUSLY. It's important, don't you think?
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The first time I had "sex", he didn't get it all the way, he just got in the head. Does this count as popping my cherry, or am I still considered a virgin? (link)
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You are not a virgin.
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A few months ago, i had a really bad cold sore at the corner of my mouth. And it finally went away 2-3 weeks later. Now i have another one in the SAME exact spot. Is it possible it could be something else and not a cold sore? (Like an STD. Ive never given oral, but theres been contact outside of my mouth.) (link)
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Coldsores ARE herpes.
Herpes is a virus that lives in your body now and will never die until you do.
Yes, it is considered to be a Sexually Transmitted Disease (STD).
Here:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=576423
"I know you REALLY don't want to hear this but it REALLY needs to be said.
Coldsores (also referred to as "fever blisters") ARE herpes. They are, typically, HSV-1, or commonly referred to as "oral herpes". All coldsores. Yes, every single one of them. You can contract herpes at any stage of life through many harmless activities.
Relax though. It isn't the end of the world if you take care of yourself. About 80% of the United States population is infected with one of the herpes strains (HSV-1 or HSV-2). You're not alone.
A way to help clear up an outbreak is to take care of yourself better. Take a good multivitamin and keep up with it. Herpes symptoms are shown when your immune system drops, allowing the virus to shed more rapidly than normal and create a sore. Stress, catching a cold or being under the weather, and even menstruation can "cause" an outbreak to occur.
Take an extra vitamin C supplement to help boost the immune system right now. Vitamin C is good for your skin so it will help to regenerate those damaged cells on your lip. It will also help your skin to heal faster from the outbreak, leaving less scarring.
Pick up a L-Lysine supplement to take during your outbreak. Take 200mg of lysine each day for 7 days and then stop for at least 2 weeks. If you continue to take them past 7 days your body will become "immune" to them and they won't help heal your sore or prevent more severe outbreaks.
Using rubbing alcohol isn't doing your body any help probably. The infection is more inner than a scrape or a wound. The infection is coming WITHIN the body. Putting the alcohol on your mouth is just torturing yourself in the end. It isn't going to keep it any "cleaner" than washing it with warm soap and water and keeping your hands off of it would. It's fairly useless to be doing.
Abreva doesn't work for everyone. When I have outbreaks abreva doesn't seem to even come close to helping the swelling go down. I believed up some Releev once on a whim and have had really good luck with that if I apply it as directed as soon as I realize I am beginning to have an outbreak. You might want to try a few different OTC treatments to see which works best for you and your lips.
Don't kiss anyone during your outbreak or for at least 15 days after. You are at your peak risk zone right now because more of the virus is being shed on those damaged cells. DO NOT share any food or beverages with anyone. I contracted HSV-1 (coldsores) from sharing drinks with my mother when I was a little girl. I didn't even know I "had" anything until I was a grown adult woman!
Make sure to keep your lips moisturized when the outbreak calms down (you don't want to be smearing chapstick on the lips right now because it may help to spread the virus to other parts of your mouth). Keeping your lips hydrated will help decrease the virus shedding so make sure to drink lots of WATER!
Keep using the ice. Ice your lip for 15 minutes and then wait a half hour and do it again. Make sure to wash the cloth you use to wrap the ice in afterwards to reduce the risk of infecting others in your household or other areas of your body.
KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF OF IT! If you touch the sore then assume you have the virus on your hands. Wash your hands IMMEDIATELY then. People have been known to spread the virus insanely fast by touching the coldsore and then another area of their body, especially the genitals or broken skin (and with this being winter your skin is more vulnerable if it's dry or cracked). Many infants and toddlers contract genital herpes because of their parents not washing their hands before a diaper change! Yeah, really!
Relax and stop panicking. As I said before, stress only makes the outbreaks worse. Relax and go with the flow. You're not the only one in the school with HSV-1 (coldsores). You might be the only one in your classroom with an outbreak right now but don't worry. If you take care of yourself and make sure to keep clean and not spread it then that's something to be proud of and not ashamed about.
This link that I wrote about herpes, and that also includes more of my links about herpes information, might be very helpful to you:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=572641 "
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So, I found a kitten super early monday morning outside my apartment and he ran right up to me and started meowing and purring and I brought him upstairs and fed him (he was really hungry) and he was also really dirty. I have since taken him to the vet and had all his vaccines done and am planing on getting him neutered on the 20th. I already love him and I am one of those people who considers animals to be like humans.
Today, I am walking around the neighborhood and there are flyers everywhere with the kitten I found on them. I don't know what to do. I don't think I can give him up (it would be like giving away a human baby) and my other cat already has bonded with him.
Should I ignore the flyers and not do anything and just keep him? Should I email these people and say that I found him and Im not giving him back, or should I give him back :'(
I need some advice. . . (link)
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If there is a number on the flyer then it's most appropriate to call them and let them know that you have found the kitten. From there you can explain how much you and the kitten have bonded and that you hate having to give the little one up. Let them know that you've already gotten him vaccinated after cleaning him up, feeding him, and have been taking very good care of him.
The people have two options from there. They may see how much you care about this kitten and allow you to keep him. They, also, may be so dreadfully heartbroken that they want him back more than anything.
If they take the little guy back then don't fight it. Be mature and bring him over to their house. Ask them if you can visit him often or if they wouldn't mind allowing you to pet-sit him when they go out of town. Make sure to leave your name and phone number so that they can call if they change their minds or take a vacation and need your assistance.
To just ignore the flyers is just cruel. If they took the time to create multiple flyers then he probably means a lot to them, too. Sometimes we can't always have what we want. Be graceful and call them immediately about him.
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just moved into a new house and the water here is absolutely terrible. It comes out looking yellow even! It's scary because it's SO hard to get things clean and white again. A problem I am having is the toilet in the upstairs bathroom though. It is stained from the minerals in the hard water we have. I have tried a lot of the regular toilet bowl cleaners (the Lysol and Clorox brands) but they don't really get those stains out! It's embarrassing because it LOOKS like it's never been cleaned. Does anybody know how to get these toilet bowl stains out without having to replace the darn thing (because it's just going to have that build-up again and again)? (link)
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There is a step-by-step guide located here:
http://www.xomba.com/hard_water_stain_removal
which uses a pumice stone to get most of the minerals off of the toilet bowl. It can be really hard to do a hard water stain removal but it can be done without having to replace the toilet. Don't give up and give the above a shot! :) It worked for me the first time around and it really doesn't take hardly any time once you get use to it.
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Please dont say anything mean.
18/f
i come here from the phillipines. for those who know the phillipines we are not the richest country. i moved to washington just this last summer. my family comes from proverty so much so that we didnt own a tooth brush. so thats why my teeth are yellow. i was wondering is there anything other than brushing my teeth that will whiten my teeth. (link)
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Oil-pulling with extra-virgin cold-pressed organic coconut oil. In time, it can whiten AND strengthen your teeth.
Make sure you start seeing a dentist now. I understand how it is to live in a third-world country like the Philippines (by the way, you spelled it wrong, oddly enough) but it's time to make some changes for your own health and safety.
Avoid bleaching or using whitening kits on your teeth since there has been a fair amount of damage done to them through lack of care. There's no reason to use harmful cleaners when you can use something with no ill side effects at all, right? Heck, it's cheaper, lasts-longer, and improves your health! What more can you ask for? ;)
How do you start oil pulling? Easy...
"...
To oil-pull you must begin with the basics of it. Oil-pulling helps to pull toxins out of the blood stream through the mouth so it is essential to do the practice as long as permitted within the time range. It is advised to oil-pull with 2TBS of your chosen oil for 20 to 25 minutes without swallowing.
Most people use sunflower or safflower oil to oil-pull with but any oil can be used; however, it is preferable to avoid the use of canola oil and regular vegetable oil. It is also preferable to use oil that is cold-pressed and untoasted. Coconut oil is said to help with whitening teeth and helping to strength the roots of the teeth as well. There is also reports of adding olive oil extract to sunflower oil during oil pulling to cure oral and genital herpes! Whatever oil you choose, remember to stick with it for at least two weeks before moving on if you desire.
Oil-pulling is almost like swishing mouthwash but not quite. Focus on moving the oil from the far back of your mouth to the front of your teeth and then back again. Push the oil through your teeth. After 5 minutes of pushing and pulling the oil in your mouth, begin swishing it throughout the mouth, cover all areas. Cover your mouth entirely with the oil for 1 to 2 minutes before returning to the pushing and pulling motion as before..."
More information on Oil-Pulling and how to start doing it is located here: http://www.xomba.com/how_begin_oil_pulling
And here is the link to help you find a good price on purchasing Nutiva Organic Extra Virgin Coconut Oil (cold-pressed):
http://www.vitacost.com/Nutiva-Organic-Extra-Virgin-Coconut-Oil-15-oz
Ingat ka lagi.
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I need to now some good books for school [ 7th graders] the genre fantasy or historical fantasy (link)
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Many books are very, very good reads even if they aren't centered around fantasy so I do hope you keep that in mind. I will list some good books for 7th graders to read and maybe something there will be of interest to you, despite them not being specifically fantasy-oriented (sometimes they can really surprise you with how exciting they end up being):
The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton
Where The Red Fern Grows
Make Lemonade
Dragon Rider, Inkheart and Inkspell by Cornelia Funke
Freak the Mighty by Rodman Philbrick
Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
Loser by Jerry Spinelli
Hatchet by Gary Paulson
Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams
I am a little older than 7th grade but my favorite books are:
1984 by George Orwell
and
Night by Eli Wiesel
People are seem to highly suggest the entire Harry Potter series, Twilight, Eragon, Inkheart, Magyk, Avalon High, Peter and the Star Catchers, the Bartimaeus Trilogy, the Diadem series, Lord of the Ring series, and...
Invincible, Runaways, and Marvel 1602
which are based on superheroes, apparently?
If you go to:
http://www.exodusbooks.com/category.aspx?id=5226
You will see that all of those books are considered fantasy and have grade suggestions on them (like 5th - 9th and such). Scroll through them and see if something catches your eye that is suggested for your grade-range. :)
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15/F; Okay, so about a year ago I became friends with a girl who slowly but surely changed who I was (we'll call her Allison). I used to be this incredibly brilliant student who was smart in all different ways. My parents were so proud of me, I had friends and went to their houses and sometimes hung out at the movies and mall and such, you know, normal things. Then one day probably 8 months ago or so, me, Allison, and a couple other friends went to a fast food restaurant after school, and saw this "bad boy" that Allison and another girl recognized, and we all knew the name. We went over to talk to him (he was smoking a cigarette) and he was just telling us all he's been through, like going to jail and being in a group home. I immediately hated him and saw him as someone I would never associate myself with, and pretty much realized I had to keep myself on track to avoid being him. Little did we all know, one of the girl's mothers was driving around the parking lot we were in (my friend was 13 at the time) and saw us. She told my mother, and my mom flipped out, saying that once I started high school I better not associate with people like him, and I earnestly agreed with her and she took this as a wakeup call, because I was her oldest, on how she should be watching me. I continued to stay friends with Allison, and throughout my first few months of high school I actually ended up hanging out with that guy's friends, whom I met at a football game because I talked to him with her. Even then I never believed I would really become friends with them. Come November, I ended up smoking pot behind a movie theatre, and maybe too weeks later becoming drunk off my ass at Allison's. I felt like I was on my high horse because even though my parents were still strict, I was getting away with these things. A friend tipped off her mom about the drinking at Allisons, who went to my mother, and I ended up flat out lying saying I would never do anything like that and was insulted at the accusation. Then it was New Years Eve. I got this incredibly random text message from the boy I met at the football game, inviting me to a party. On a huge whim, I lied saying I was sleeping over at my friend's house behind our house, and my parents believed me and I went to this party, slept over at the boy's house, and got driven home in the morning, and never got caught. At that party, the boy I met way back in the parking lot was there, and we talked and started getting somewhat romantically involved. Two days later he wanted to hang out, so he brought me to this guy's house who was 19, and I had met twice before briefly. I lied again and said I was sleeping over the same friend's house. I got sexually involved with the boy from the parking lot. Allison found out, and got jealous, so out of spite, told her parents. My mother got suspicious because I slept nearly all day, and when Allison's mother told her, she became a wreck. I told her outright I didn't do, and continued to lie. Well my story had loopholes, plus all she had to do was ask my neighbor's house if I was really there, and she said no. I ended up admitting to the drinking from before, but never said anything about the weed. I was grounded for a month and still am not trusted (because of minor problems since then).
Now after that huge backstory; here's the problem. When my mother parents me, she believes she is 3000% right. She is always right, and I am always wrong. She makes me tell her where and who I'm with all the time, and if I'm walking around town or something, I have to tell her every time I go somewhere else. Sometimes she drives to where I say I am to make sure I'm there. All my friends think she's crazy. She tends to think she's being completely fair. She asks me every week if I still have contact with "that boy" as she refers to him as, and I lie and say no, even though I've talked to him twice or so since that incident. She makes me do insanely well in school, and is disappointed in my C average in math, despite its incredible difficulty and her barely proficient math skills. She just got her master's degree two months ago, which I had to do all the technological and grammatical aspects of, and my father never finished college, after taking maybe two honors classes throughout high school. Her expectations don't add up. It would at least make more sense if both my parents were perfect doctors, or something. But we barely have money, my parents constantly fight over my father's dependence of my mom, and my sister is a 10 year old brat who is screamed at daily. But alas, despite all this, we make sure I'm watched over all the time. Sometimes I understand what their saying, and other times I just want to keep lying all the time and not care. I'm so bipolar on these feelings, in fact sometimes I'm crying of paranoia and other times music or TV inspires me to rebel, and I feel so happy. I mean one minute I want everything in the world and I work so hard in school, and the next I stay up all night, do no schoolwork and seriously consider either running away, dropping out of school, or just not going to college. I guess my parent's parenting as well as my mental health combine to one disaster which leaves me generally unhappy and just STUCK. I pretty much need help, because as my mother says, "I'm not content with mediocrity."
I apologize for the length. (link)
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All of this, if you are lucky, is just a phase.
I want to touch on a few things you're written here. By the length of your given information I'm certain you have left many things out. There are things you are not rationally seeing, literally because of your age.
Completely out of order:
"It would at least make more sense if both my parents were perfect doctors, or something. But we barely have money..."
This is why your parents push you to better than "C" average work. They, obviously, understand that being AVERAGE is not really an achievement and isn't going to help you pursue your career later in life. They're struggling right now for those very reasons! I am shocked you haven't picked up on that.
Example: Your mother is extremely poor mathematical skills and she is aware of it. She has "passed her prime" on upgrading this knowledge and didn't take advantage of the information given to her in school when she was young. She doesn't want you to have to deal with the mess she has to because of this.
Example: A "C" grade is NOTHING to be happy about. "C" is average. Who wants to strive to be average? Does the average man become a doctor or lawyer? Does the average man make more income than he knows what to do with? Does the average man have the best house available to him?
Your parents want you to push yourself to WANT to be beyond average. A grade in school doesn't seem like much now but it will later. You can say, "Man, it was SO hard but I made an A. I worked my butt off for that stupid grade. I can do this, piece of cake, if I just set my mind to it like I did back then..."
Now that I'm out of high-school I am disappointed at the grades I made in school. I can't believe I wasted that time I was given. I didn't understand why my parents wanted me to get good grades when NEITHER of them even finished high school but I understand now--when it's too late to go back and change it.
"Okay, so about a year ago I became friends with a girl who slowly but surely changed who I was (we'll call her Allison)."
Allison didn't change you, belive it or not. It was your choice to change. The media you've surrounded yourself with has told you that the "bad-boy" type is really appealing, even when you KNOW he's BAD for you! The media you surround yourself with, coupled with the fact that you surrounded yourself with peers that believe the media as well, helped you lead this sort of life and make these conclusions.
Do yourself a favor and rent the movie Idiocracy.
That will be life if we don't stop doing the STUPID things we do. Why would any woman EVER want to be with a guy that was unhealthy mentally and physically, completely unreliable, and seen as a social outcast? It isn't natural to desire those traits in a mate yet you slept with that and continue to keep in contact with that type of person.
If YOU CHOOSE to surround yourself with those types of people then you risk becoming those types. You acknowledge it right here that you have changed and then go on to list off all of the NEGATIVE things. Nobody likes liars (at all). Nobody likes people who sneak around (let alone sleep around with someone who is viewed as a disgrace). Nobody likes somebody who doesn't strive for excellence (why do you think the Army's slogan is effective?).
Example: You surround yourself with stoners and pot-heads. All of your friends do this sort of activity. They view it as fun and enjoyable. Even if you, yourself, don't pick up the "habit" then they HAVE altered your views on stoners. You're more likely to "test" it out sometime. You're more likely to not be able to see the signs of addiction and abuse. You're more likely to be more slack in judgement in others (and get hurt from it). I know because I did that!
"Then one day probably 8 months ago or so, me, Allison, and a couple other friends went to a fast food restaurant after school, and saw this "bad boy" that Allison and another girl recognized, and we all knew the name. We went over to talk to him (he was smoking a cigarette) and he was just telling us all he's been through, like going to jail and being in a group home. I immediately hated him and saw him as someone I would never associate myself with, and pretty much realized I had to keep myself on track to avoid being him."
"I got sexually involved with the boy from the parking lot."
Read that again. You KNOW he is bad for you. He smokes cigarettes (ewh), has been in a group home (broken), and has spent time in jail (self-destructive). Why would you EVER let him touch you? Think about it. Is that really somebody who you want to father your children in the future? Do you REALLY want what he probably has (because he probably has never even heard of a full-blown STD test)? You "realized" that you had to keep away from him to continue on the right path for a GOOD life...why did you throw that away?
"I felt like I was on my high horse because even though my parents were still strict, I was getting away with these things."
No, actually. I can tell you why you felt so high-and-mighty when you were doing things. It's because you felt you were socially fitting in somewhere. Teens typically have problems with feeling socially accepted. By you participating in these harmful activities, no matter how much it hurt you or others, you felt you "belonged" somewhere. Sometimes it's better to not "belong" to the wrong crowd, feel a little socially awkward for awhile, and go on to do great things with your life. It's true.
You're going down a very unpleasant path and if you don't literally open your eyes up and see it then you're going to be completely lost, just like many of your peers right now.
In a year you've smoked pot. In a year you've gotten "drunk off your ass" at a person's house that you can't REALLY say is a friend. You've slept with a boy that is risky is all aspects, including risking your own health by doing so. You've started sneaking around and lying to people who love you and only want you to have a good, fulfilling life. You've concluded that your elders know absolutely nothing because of the simple fact that they acknowlege their own unhappiness and are trying to prevent that from happening to you.
Step back and really look at yourself.
If all of this happened in a year...what will another year bring? Seriously.
What are you striving to achieve in these things?
Do you want to push your mother away and hurt her? Do you want her to stop caring about you? Why are you lying to her then? Why aren't you listening to what she has to say and RATIONALLY seeing her point of view? Why can't you see that she LOVES you and is NOT doing anything to harm you.
Of course she is going to check up on you often! If my child had lied to me and put herself in such horrible situations I would double-check where she is at all times! I would be AFRAID for her because of the people she is surrounding herself with!
Trust me, your mother is not getting her jollies from making sure you're at your friend's house like you said you were going to be.
Your mother has already been a teenager. She's seem the programs on TV and the listened to the music on the radio. The commercials for Trojan condoms do not go unnoticed. She KNOWS what you're up against.
She isn't being strict at all with her check-ups on you. Being strict is not ever letting you leave the house for any purpose, including school (home-schooling). Being strict is not allowing you to watch or listen to ANY of the mainstream media (how I wish we would change that as a society).
Sit down and tell your mother everything. Ask her to forgive you and to help you change all of this. Tell her about it all. Tell her about you sneaking out. Tell her about you having sex with pretty much the worst person you could have picked. Tell her everything and ask her to please help you while you can be helped. Go to church, volunteer at local places, find better things to do with your time.
I almost want to laugh and say this is some sort of joke that you cannot see why your parents are so right and what you're doing is so wrong. I know it's the truth though. This sort of thing makes me sick to my stomach that our youth cannot see what is right and what is wrong. It makes me want to cry to see how you don't even care about yourself.
I expect a 1 back from you because that's typically how these sorts of things go.
When you're older, I hope to God that you'll look back and then and make yourself sick with what you've written. I don't want anybody to go down that road. I know what it's like and it is NOT worth it at all. Don't throw your life away when it's just beginning. I'm not overreacting because I have been where you are standing and if it wasn't for somebody pulling me up by the hair on my head, slapping me around and screaming, "What are you doing?!" I would have gone somewhere that...I just can't imagine. All of my friends are in places they don't want to be and can't figure out how they got there. Please, wake up.
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Me and my boyfriend are trying to get me pregnant but it seems to be not working. I just got out of collage and im living in an apartment with him and we have sex every other day .. it isnt working.. is there something I shouldnt be doing?
Thank you.
Victoria (link)
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A few months is absolutely nothing is the getting-pregnant world. It takes many people up to a year to get pregnant!
Make sure you're leading a healthy lifestyle first and foremost. Many times the female's body is not healthy enough to carry a child to full term or the male's body is producing plenty of UNhealthy sperm that cannot survive the travel to fertilize the egg.
You and your partner need to be taking vitamins every single day. You should be on a prenatal for at least 6 months before you conceive and your partner needs to be on multivitamins specifically for men to help keep his prostate working properly. I am taking a liking to Maxi Health Maxi One Prenatal:
http://www.vitacost.com/Maxi-Health-Maxi-One-Prenatal
My husband is really, really fond of Prescriptive Formula Optimal Men's Vitamin Pack by Nature's Bounty:
http://www.amazon.com/Prescriptive-Formula-Optimal-Mens-Vitamin/dp/B000KPTTVG
Stop smoking, drinking, and using recreational drugs. All of these listed have been proven to cause inferlity short and long term. The sooner you stop, the better chances you will have now and later.
Change your eating habits. Stop eating so much junk food and candies and start eating more vegetables. The better nutrition you receieve, the better your body will absorb it. Dump out the junk (and, no, don't try artifical sweeteners because they've shown to produce infertility as well)--the sodas, candies, cakes, etc. You don't have to do anything so strict that you cannot have a little snack here and there but you need to be aware of what you're putting into your body every day.
Stop consuming things with artificial sweeteners in them. In the long run, it's better to drink a can of coke than it is diet coke. The artificial sweeteners in many products cause so many health problems it's ridiculous.
Exercise regularly. You don't have to go out to the gym or lift weights but you and your husband both need to give your muscles a work out at least 3 times a week. Go for a short walk together or do a workout video together that you both are able to do. It's vital that you both work on this.
Make sure to de-stress often, at least once a week. Make time to just relax. Watch your favorite movie together or just have a night out bowling. Whatever it is that you need to do to relax--do it! Stop worrying about getting pregnant or others getting pregnant--it only adds to the problem! Know that when it's time then you two will have a baby. Relax about the situation and try to get your mind away from the focus of it.
Track your cycles. From the day you begin your period you need to keep track on a calendar of what is going on. Mark your first day down as "Start" and 'x' the following days that you are bleeding. After 6 months of this you should get a decent idea of when you might be ovulating. Ovulation, typically, occurs about halfway through your regular menstrual cycle or on day 14 for most women. During ovulation you will have more chances of concieving because of the conditions within your body.
If you cannot track your cycles because they are SO irregular (more than 32 days long, typically) then I hope you have a little cash saved up! Start buying some things at your local Wal-Mart or other store:
OTC Daily Ovulation Predictors
OTC Fertility Tests
OTC Pregnancy Tests
Begin with the fertilty tests so that you know you are able to get pregnant. Use these for at least 6 months so you get a strong idea of the results. Use the daily ovulation tests every day for at least 6 months so that you can grasp a better idea of when/if you are ovulating.
Throw away:
Your artificial lubrication.
Artificial sex lube hinders the sperm's ability to be mobile and may make them unhealthy. Try to drink more fluids (WATER!) so that your vagina can maintain good lubrication when needed.
Have sex every 3 days at the most. Having sex more often than that can cause sperm counts to go low, dehydrate the body, and dwindle away nutrients.
Ask your partner to NOT wear tight pants. Tight clothing causes circulation problems in the testes and may make things too warm for sperm to develop properly. Let him around around the house in his boxers (or nude)! If you have to go shopping for looser pants and underwear then do it! It's healthier for him in the long run!
Pick up a iodine supplment for you and your husband to take regularly. New research is finding that many Americans are depleted of idoine and are experiencing common problems because of it--diabetes, low metabolism, headaches, fatigue, and temporary infertility! Head down to your local vitamin shop and look around for some kelp for iodine supplementation (along with your prenatals and your partner multi)! Look for, preferably, Norwegian sea kelp or Bladderwrack. Consume 1,500 to 2,000 Milligrams of this supplement each day. My favorite one, so far, has been Nature's Herbs Norwegian Kelp:
http://www.vitacost.com/Natures-Herbs-Norwegian-Kelp
Relax. It really hasn't been that long of a time. Many couples find that when they stop worrying about becoming pregnant and start leading healthy lives together, happy to just be together, they become pregnant. Getting pregnant sounds easy but it's a very complicated thing. Your uterine conditions have to be a certain way to produce offspring. Toxins built up in your body can prevent you from becoming pregnant. Having a stressful job may cause you to miscarriage before you even know you're pregnant! It's possible that you've been pregnant a dozen times already and have never made it past a couple of weeks!
So, most importantly than anything, don't panic. It'll come when your body can handle it. If you've been trying for a year or more then see your doctor just for a routine check-up, making sure things are OK.
It'll all happen in time. I wish you the best of luck. Please feel free to inbox me more directly if you have any further questions, as I have a LOAD of useful information when trying to get pregnant!
P.S. Don't listen to people who say that it's been too long to have not gotten pregnant. Some people get pregnant very easily, very luckily while most of us take a little time, especially if we haven't treated ourselves very well all of our lives. There are tons of couples who get pregnant after two years even!
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on the song milkshake what does milkshake mean?
(link)
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If you check out the REAL, UNCENSORED lyrics to Milkshake by Kelis then it's very clear what "milkshake" really means! Heck, the album title "Tasty" sort-of gives the idea way anyway.
There is also the idea that:
"A "Milkshake" is a girl's sensual energy - what makes her stand out from the other girls. Taken more literally, it is about a girl who dances seductively and attracts the attention of boys in the club. Her "milkshake" is the way she shakes her boobs. It can also be taken to mean oral sex. Bringing the "boys to the yard" could be about attracting boys like a dog in heat."
In the December 12, 2004 Observer Music Magazine, Kelis said that Milkshake "means whatever people want it to; it was just a word we came up with on a whim, but then the song took on a life of its own." (thanks, Edward Pearce - Ashford, Kent, England)
It is also reported that Kelis said:
" "Milkshake" is just that thing that makes a woman stand out from everyone else. It's a thing that makes you sensual and warm and maternal. It could be about breasts but I don't have huge tits so you gotta work with what you got."
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i've been living with the mental condition brain fog for 6 years already. [i just recently found out i had this condition; i diagnosed myself ] for those that doesn't know what brain fog is; "it's a condition where people are in a state of confusion and a decreased level of clarity. Brain fog can cause an individual to be abnormally forgetful and detached. It can also lead to a feeling of discouragement and depression."
i've been extremely depressed, tried to commit suicide several times, been called "delusional," became anti-social, and lost numerous interests that i used to love doing.
i coudl feel, touch, smell, see, and hear my surroundings...yet i feel as though i'm not mentally there. everything seems so fake.
i tried everything the doctor told me to do; more excersise, more vitamins, a change in diet and such...yet i still feel dead. i want to feel alive again...i do not know what to do.
i do not want to suffer from brain fog for the rest of my life. those six years having brain fog has already taken so much out of me...
help. (link)
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Believe it or not, the real term is not actually "brain fog" but, more like, depersonalization disorder. It may also, in actuality, be PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) if something occured before these feelings began that may have altered your normal behavior.
There are many, many things you can do about these sorts of detachment issues. It's not fun to just be "going through the motions" of every day life but there ARE answers to solve these problems you suffer from.
It's very difficult to give you a diagnosis without having at least one lengthy session one-on-one with you, detailing your childhood until present day. It's likely that you are not a "dead" person inside and that you are suffering from an accute form of depression; although, like I said, it's fairly impossible to give you a proper diagnosis without meeting with you about these issues.
You must deal with this problem now. You absolutely cannot just accept it as it is. You need to solve this or you will end up leading a very sad life. Nobody deserves to have to go through a joyless lifetime.
I suggest two very major things that you would have to stick by to make them work:
1. Seek out a proper therapist. Meet with him/her at least once a month, preferably more often. Talking things out will help you to figure out what happened and when it happened. You may be able to understand this problem better and overcome the emotional barrier with a good therapist. Sometimes one event can cause a mind to shut off something very vital in the future--something you need to open back up now.
2. Begin to create a meaningful life for yourself. Personally, I suggest volunteerism because it creates a bond with your surrounding community and fulfills our desires to be needed by others. This in itself is therapy and you must view it as such--something you ABSOLUTELY MUST do every when scheduled.
Sit down and find out your local organizations looking for volunteers. You may volunteer at the hospital (keeping things organized for nurses' and help patients cope), an elderly center (keeping someone company in their old age), a child's center or library (reading to the children), at a soup kitchen, a homeless shelter, delivering food to elderly shut-ins, working at the battered women's/children centers, or even raising funds for a foundation. Preferably you should set aside one day a week at the minimum to volunteer at your choice of organization. It's your choice if you want to volunteer at just one organization every friday or mix-and-match every thursday.
Many people now are so busy with their own lives that they lose sight of what it is to be loving and caring. You see, knowing that you are helping others does great things for the self-imagine. You soon realize that you aren't useless and just a blob of flesh bobbing along through life.
It really seems that the problem is our current lifestyles. We no longer "have time" to help others. Nobody volunteers now because they feel that they should be paid money for their time. Nobody goes out of their way to show care for others because that time could be used for something else. Both of these are common and we're taught (it's drilled into our heads) that we are the most important in our lives. This is not true at all: the people surrounding us are the most important.
The people who surround you create your sense of belonging though. Those people help you to see yourself as useful. Those people are the ones that can show care back for you. Without those people, you aren't anything anymore. Without others you cannot create happiness or share fond experiences with another human being. When you were a child, do you remember having an outing with a friend and enjoying it? Just sitting around, eating pizza, and joking maybe? What if you had been alone? It wouldn't have been so memorable, would it? It would have been almost pointless.
The media keeps telling us to only worry about ourselves. Sure, it's find to tend to your own needs--but what happens when everyone is too busy with themselves? What happens when everyone stops worrying about caring for others? They become depressed, wondering why they don't belong somewhere and why they feel lost in society.
What's strange is the more we focus on ourselves and stop helping others, the less we feel good about ourselves. As humans, we NEED interaction. We NEED acceptance. We NEED to know we are important in life. We NEED to SHARE experiences with other people to find the joy!!! Most of all though, we desperately NEED to help others to gain all of that plus more.
Now, you may even consider doing random acts of kindness while you find an organization best suited to your current lifestyle needs:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=546646
I suggest you grab a phone book and make a few calls. Sit down with a calendar and set up one or more days a week to volunteer your time at certain places. Don't stress yourself out trying to fit things into busy schedules, but move things around so that your schedule won't be hectic but will have the fulfilling volunteer time in it. It's important to make time for this so start creating some free time to make yourself useful to your community.
Find a good therapist that you can open up to and who can find what the cause of this problem.
Begin creating reasons to feel by helping other people.
Give yourself some time to settle into the new situations. Make new friends. Laugh about jokes with eachother. Listen to how sad someone's life has been or about their exciting youth. Laugh and cry when it comes to you. It will come--just don't push it back and try to hide anymore.
Don't give up and "accept" this. You can change it. I promise.
Lastly, there are places that you can get help for the REAL problem of brain fog if you look well enough. A very wonderful, helpful site about this is CureZone, which specializes in "educating instead of medicating." You can actually reverse problems like this with herbal remedies and various exercises. For their form on Brain Fog, specifically, look here:
http://curezone.com/forums/f.asp?f=887
Your answer may be there if you take enough time to do that.
And I do apologize if this comes off as rudely but if you're willing to die because of this then what's a few hours or days to research into your own health? Seriously. If you feel that your life truly does not matter then why NOT look for a cure? Why NOT try a few things out that may OR may not work? Why not?
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2 Months ago my dog started itching uncontrollably, i took him to our groomer and they said he had a bad case of dry skin. After that i made sure to follow what they told me to do, but he wasnt getting any better.
He has chewed off all the lower fur on his back legs, has itched off his stomach fur, and front leg fur to the point where it is bleeding and or scabbed over, and just tonight he chewed all of the fur off from over his butt and had a huge gaping gash. I dont know what to do, i know i need to take him to the vet tomorrow and i plan on doing that, but i just dont understand how dry skin could be doing this?!
Also i need to know if vets will accept payment plans, i dont get paid till next friday, and im afraid they'll turn my dog away. Please help im scared for my dog (link)
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If it's dry skin then consider picking up some vitamin E gel capsules to give him each day. It shouldn't hurt him at all to take one or two capsules and they can easily be hidden within the dog food itself (or break it open and smear it on the food if you need). You may also want to flavor his water a little bit if he isn't ingesting enough. Dehydration causes dry skin, which comes from lack of enough water intake. Try switching to another water like the gallon containers from the supermarket as well...sometimes animals can taste our chemicals in our tap water and they try to avoid it.
If you'd like, you can also break open the vitamin E gels and apply directly to his skin for some more immediate relief.
Fish oil would be a great place to start that will help with the skin problem as well as many other things that you don't even realize may be going on with the dog. It's completely harmless unless for some freakish reason your dog has a fish allergic (HIGHLY doubtful). Try to find the liquid version of this (not the gel capsules) so that it's easier to digest for the little guy. You can add this to his food and his water (may help him to keep better hydration) each day. I think the liquid can even be found at Wal-Mart and various pharmacies now.
If you'd like, you can apply this oil directly to the dog's skin for more immediate relief; however, be warned that it DOES typically smell fishy.
Oatmeal baths! Oatmeal has been used for ages in help us relieve our itchy skin and it can be used for dogs too. Pick up a nice large bag and give the dog an oatmeal bath every few days to help cut down on that itchiness! :)
I've also heard of people picking up some tea tree oil (can find at your local Wal-Mart now or pharmacy) because of it killing off bacteria which may be causing the itchiness within the skin now that it's been broken open. It can be brushed into teh fur or sprayed on the dog with no dangerous side-effects. It will need to be applied every day to help soothe the pain and itch and cause the bacteria to die off. It also can clear up some allergens, which the dog may just be allergic to, that may have made it into the fur coating. On days you choose to oatmeal bathe I would spray/brush-in with tea tree oil AFTER, by the way.
Also consider de-worming at this point. Since the skin has been broken open with the mouth then some nasty parasites could have crawled into there, causing more itchy feelings. Purchase a bottel of GSE ( http://www.vitacost.com/NutriBiotic-GSE-Liquid-Concentrate-Grapefruit-Seed-Extract & it does last a LONG time) and give the little guy 10 drops a day in his food or water. It will help to clear our his system of the nasties within a couple of weeks and it won't hurt him at all, unlike some medications! :)
Lastly, you absolutely must add in a dog vitamin! Commercialized dog food (wet or dry) is not very good for a dog's health, believe it or not. Since very few of us can stand to do a completely raw diet for our furry friends we have to supplement as much as possible. With the addition of the vitamin in conjunction with the fish oil your friend should have improved health and should start feeling a little better. His fur will also be able to grow back a little faster and his wounds may heal up better than they would have without. Most pet stores carry dog vitamins as well as places like Wal-mart so there's no excuse to not help the little guy out with something like this. :)
Animals get stressed out too. Sometimes the animal will actually self-injure or mutilate itself when in a lot of stress. It doesn't happen too often but a big sign of this is eating the first down to the flesh--and then some. Take into account what your dog does during the day. Does he get to romp around and play fetch or play with somebody a few hours each day? He needs to even if you don't want to do it.
Is another animal beating up on him frequently? Has he been being scolded a lot lately? Is there a new person/baby/pet in the household now? Did a new person/baby/pet leave the household fairly recently? Is anyone pregnant? Any new friends coming over or friends that have recently become pregnant that come over frequently?
Have you changed his food at all? Has the arrangement of the furniture in the house changed? Has a member of the family's schedule changed (ie: use to go to school & now doesn't, now goes to school & didn't use to, works nights now, works days opposed to nights now, etc.)?
If he's been going potty in the house it might be another sign that he needs some more loving or that he's under a lot of stress. Think of all possibilities and try to go from there, reducing the stress by extra activities to keep his mind off of the "problem."
The reak problem is that once a dog starts this behavior it can be very, vary hard to break them of it. If he does stop, he may have "flare-ups" in which he overly grooms himself to fur chewing at the slightest problem (slight anxiety/depression or even minor skin irritations). It's kind of like people. Once we learn a way to make something stop (or get our minds off of it) then we tend to resort back to it when we're scared it's going to start up again.
Personally, I wouldn't rush the dog to the vet before trying some more natural remedies but that's really just my personal opinion on the matter. It's also much cheaper to try to self-heal this dog rather than putting a good chunk of cash into prescription doggie pills. Like I said, it's just my own beliefs here so take that as you will.
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Which would be a better engine for my car: A Gallo 12 or a Gallo 24? (link)
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Apparently this is a little joke from the 2fast2furious movie.
Brian O'Connor: So, Dunn, looks like we're gonna be partners, bro. Could you tell me right quick what would be a better motor for my Skyline, a Gallo 12 or a Gallo 24?
Agent Dunn: Um...
[clears throat]
Agent Dunn: 24?
Brian O'Connor: I didn't know pizza places made motors.
It's a trick question which is basically the equivalent of saying:
"What car model is Nissan famous for, the NSX or the Supra?"
Someone who knows absolutely NOTHING about the vehicle will say one of those options but neither is true!...
...if you're wise to the joke you'll say Skyline
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How do you get rid of hemroids? im 13 and i just went to the doctor and she says i have a small one. do they ever go away? do guys care if u have them? thanks (link)
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A hemorrhoid is like a very irritated bit of vein from your rectum. It can be very painful and can be caused by many things (pregnancy, heavy lifting, constipation). Roughly, 50% of Americans will suffer from having a hemorrhoid in their lifetime so it really isn't as gross or embarrassing as you first thought.
Up your fiber intake. You can buy products such as Benefiber, Metamucil, and ColonPure (from GNC) to help you get more fiber if you're not getting enough from fruits, vegetables, and grains.
Do NOT take laxatives for this though as diarrhea can upset the hemorrhoid further.
Make sure to drink your 8 glasses of water a day to keep hydrated.
Do not push as hard when you go to the bathroom. Pushing hard from constipation and lack of fiber is one of the main causes.
Try not to "hold it in" any longer than absolutely necessary. Go when your body says to.
Soak in a tub of warm water for about 10 - 15 minutes each day.
Many websites have suggested wiping after you poo with flushable wipes. There are many different kinds like the Kleenex Cottonelle, Charmin Fresh Mates, and Equate brand from Wal-Mart. These websites say it helps to keep the area clean and soothes it a bit.
Here is a little more information about hemorrhoids and it also has some tips to help relieve the pain (if you are experiencing any) in the meantime:
http://familydoctor.org/online/famdocen/home/common/digestive/basics/090.html
There are creams (such as Preparation H) and wipes (such as Tucks Medicated Pads) you can buy for such a thing but personally I'd go see a doctor before doing anything like that just for confirmation. Most hemorrhoids go away in a few days so it's probably best you get checked out by a professional.
If left untreated, hemorrhoids may sometimes develop into a serious and dangerous condition that requires surgery for treatment. An internal hemorrhoid can become prolapsed where the inflamed vein extends outside of the anus. Usually this vein can be gently pushed back up inside the anus but there is the possibility that it will become further swollen and become entrapped. Once the vein is entrapped, the blood supply may get cut off and the vein will die, often becoming infected. Once infection sets in, it is possible that it will spread through out the entire body and cause dangerous illness.
Ask your doctor about further care. She should have explained some of this better to you so that you knew how not to repeat this again.
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These are only hypothetical questions, none of this is actually taking place. My friends and I got curious so I thought I'd ask all of you!
Legally, would it be considered adultery for a woman to cheat on her husband with another woman?
What about a married couple having a threesome with another woman? Would it be adultery only for the man, for both, or for neither?
I live in the state of NY. I think that matters. Thanks :) (link)
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Definition of Adultery:
"Extramarital sex that willfully and maliciously interferes with marriage relations; 'adultery is often cited as grounds for divorce.'"
Source:
http://www.wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn
Further information in regards to New York:
"...New York defines an adulterer as a person who 'engages in sexual intercourse with another person at a time when he has a living spouse, or the other person has a living spouse.'"
Source:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adultery
Legally speaking, gender has nothing to do with being an adulterer, really. A woman can be an adulterer if she cheats on her spouse with another woman. A man can be an adulterer if he cheats on his spouse with another man.
So, is a threesome adultery? It might be, depending on the specific laws in the state it occurred in, but it would depend on the state of each partner and the marriage after the sexual behavior occurred.
If it ends up interferring with a marriage then it would, most likely, be considered adultery on both halves of the marriage. Threesomes are, typically, willfully so if it "maliciously" hurt the marriage in the end then both partners would have committed adultery even though it was with the same person at the same time.
I'm sure there have been cases where two people committed adultery with the same person, whether they knew it at the time or not, and both were considered adulterers. The only difference with the threesome is that all three people are in the same place at the same time. It all depends on what happens to the marriage from there on out, apparently.
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i'm 14 years old female. i had sex with my boyfriend 4 days after my period we did it with a condom then i gave him a hand job and about a hour later we did it a little without a condom and he didn't cum in my though. is there still a chance i can get pregnant from when he cumed before the 2nd time? (link)
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Xenolan is NOT being scary but actually very realisitc. When people are actually TRYING to make a baby they have a 25% chance each month to actually "time it just right" to get pregnant.
Ovulation is usually the time women get pregnant because the egg is in the perfect conditions. Sperm are able to live longer in the female's body at this time because of the slight temperature change within her and because of the add mucus to help them swim to the egg.
Ovulation usually happens around day 14 to 15 for most women. Most is not "all" though and we should keep that in mind.
Example: I, personally, ovulate on day 20 of my cycle. That's a good 5 days difference. When you couple that with the fact that sperm have been found STILL ALIVE as long as two weeks after ejaculation into the female's body--PREGNANCY RISK!
It is also true that condoms are NOT 100% effective on preventing pregnancy. A most realistic percentage is actually about 88% with TYPICAL usage.
Your boyfriend is constantly making healthy sperm that can travel up into your uterus and fertilize your ONE egg. A full ejaculation contains as many as 100 million sperm at a time, and sperm within pre-ejaculate can be as many as a few million. If a guy ejaculates a second time shortly after the first the count has dropped but not as many as you would like to hope. I would gather to say it would probably be around half of the average amount he produces, especially given his young age.
You're risking your health and the rest of your life. Is this something you REALLY want to risk? 14 is really young to become a mother.
Think about it.
There ARE better things to do with your boyfriend that will help to bond you two and strengthen the relationship you two have.
You can prove your love and feel good in so many ways. It's a shame that teens don't realize that now. You don't need to throw sex around to have a good time to show someone you care. My suggestion for the time being is simply this:
Make memories of your youth.
When you're older you'll have something to say. Your grandchildren will all sit around, wanting you to tell them about the time you and grandpa went out and did this and that. They'll come to you advice on how to make their own relationships work and you'll be able to say, "It isn't about having sex. It isn't about saying you're going to marry them. It's about life, love, and making lasting memories together."
I feel sad that a lot of the teenagers now won't have a "how we met" story other than, "We met at a party and starting making out and had sex." I feel sad that teenagers will have to say, "I was engaged to 3 guys before he asked me and we got married." I feel sad that they won't have anything to say about what they did together other than, "Well, we we could see each other, we had sex. Sometimes with a condom, sometimes without. We had a few pregnancy scares." I feel sad that they will have to tell their own children things like, "No, your mother/father wasn't my first sexually. I lost my virginity when I was 13 to this one guy/girl. I had been with 13 people prior to your mother/father."
Go roller-blading.
See concerts.
Go to the park and watch old people in love.
Lay on the ground and look at the clouds.
Go on movie dates.
Share a milkshake.
Read books together.
Go have a few double-dates with your best friend.
Volunteer together.
Talk to strangers together and see if you can help brighten their day.
Help each other grow.
Don't worry about sex.
The time will come when that will really be important.
The time is not now.
Be 14.
Be 15.
Be 16.
Be 17.
Be 18.
Be 19.
Be 20.
Be 21.
Enjoy your youth while you can, and look back to laugh and smile at the good, wholesome memories.
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What can I do to improve my youtube videos or do you like them as they are?
http://www.youtube.com/user/binabaybe
Checkk emm out.(:
(Editor's note: Check out the one titled "Kary's Comedy..." I always wondered why trolls got under bridges. Lol!) (link)
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In regards to other comments made, I don't see "advertisement" anywhere here. I am glad you came for advice about your videos :) it's always good to look for opinions and improvements to personal interests.
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Now, I've watched a few of your videos and think they are pretty darn good for what you've been doing.
My favorite that I saw was the Blah Blah Blah video you did. I really actually liked that you put the word "Blah" to pop up on yourself just as Kesha sings it. It was really cute and pretty impressive at your timing of it all :D Great unique ideas.
LOL it was just darn funny too :)
My least favorite one is the most recent video you did called Shut Up and Let Me Go (The Ting Tings sing it) because it wasn't as creative as the other ones you've done--but still not a bad attempt.
Oh, and my husband totally laughed his butt off at the troll joke your mom's boyfriend said on Kary's Comedy video. He had to rewind it and listen to it again because it was so good. You were smart to catch that on video!
The Hotel Room Service one you did was really nifty with those video effects and the kids helping you with the video. Very creative.
The ONLY improvement that I can see from what I did watch is that you shouldn't try to "lip" the words so hard when you do it. Say them naturally, as if you were the actual singer. In one video you tried to lip-synch so thick that you were a clear second off of the words that were being said. It was a good attempt though so don't take the negative comment so rough--just try to let it FLOW more naturally! :)
You have some really good talent that you should keep up. This is a great hobby, especially for building your creativity. GOOD JOB! I really enjoyed it! :)
LOL
Give 'em
"L"
!!!
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Hey, I was just wondering if you could really get an STD from giving head. Because I just read it on here, and I've given head to one of my ex's, and I never knew that there was a possibility that I would get an STD, and now I'm really scared about it. Can you guys please help me out? (link)
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You can get just as many STDs from having oral sex as you can having vaginal intercourse.
Serious risks include:
1. Herpes is probably the biggest STD risk during oral sex. Both strains of herpes can live in the mouth or the genitals, and particularly during outbreaks (cold sores, herpes lesions) can be passed from one place to the other. More than 50% of a random group of people will have antibodies to the virus (indicating some level of infection). Genital herpes is complicated and uncomfortable. Herpes can be passed on even if no sores are present.
2. Chlamydia and gonorrhea can infect your throat, showing strep like symptoms. These can also infect the eye; eye infections can have serious consequences. Roughly, 80% of women who have chlamydia have no symptoms and it can prevent them from ever having children.
3. HIV can be passed through unprotected oral sex. The infected semen/precum or vaginal fluid must enter the body through a cut or sore in the mouth or esophagus. You may not even be aware you have a cut in your mouth or throat. Some people take up to 10 years to show that they have contracted HIV/AIDS.
4. HPV can be passed during oral sex. HPV has been found on vocal chords. There is no test to find out if a man has HPV and men usually show no symptoms.
5. Syphilis can be passed similar to HIV. Signs and symptoms are indistinguishable from those of other diseases so some people go a long time without knowing they have it. Mothers can pass this onto their babies without knowing it.
6. Hepatitis A is also a risk, but usually only oral-anal contact. Hep A is not a chronic condition like Hep B and C, but can make a person quite sick several weeks.
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