Mercy_x_Me's advice column | Page 30

home view feedback ask questions add as friend advicenators

Gender:

Female

Member Since:

July 21, 2004

Answers:

1117

Last Update:

June 24, 2008

Visitors:

58817

Favorite Columnists

BlueEyedBlondie725

Main Categories:

Fashion and Styles

Home Decorating

about

advice

hey hey! well i was wondering how long it usually takes for the tanning bed to work and the color to kick in?? and for you to start getting noticably dark?? also what are some good lotions?? thanks!!

I think really you can pick times. The longer your on the bed the darker you get. Probably would take you a half an hour to an hour on a tanning bed and then probably like another hour after for the colors to really start showing!

Good Luck!
Much Love -- Melanie --

hey wuts up people my friend like this grl in my high school. He saiz shes nice and stuff like that but i never see him hanging out with her and i happen to be friends with her and she barely knows who he is. I think he just likes her because she is like the leader of the cheerleading squad or wutever its called. Someone give me a way to tell this kid hes retarded and he only like sher cuz shes a cheerlead in a *nice* way

Actually there is no nice way to tell him he's retarded. I think you should just let him be because obviously he thinks he has something to prove to you, and you don't need that, so he'll automatically leave you alone eventually. Just dont stoop down to his level, thats the worst thing you could possibly do.

melanie xoxo

im going out with this guy since yesterday who i've never talked to. we're in the same health class. tomorrow his friend told me to talk to him. im really nervous because i dont know what to say at all. any ideas? also, how should i make it look like im not as nervous as i really am? thanx!

you've never talked an your going out? well of course its going to be difficult, but its your choice and you like him. Talk about things you like. Usually music is really good. How about scheduling plans?? Like movies, hanging out... anything you want, really.

Good luck
xoxo

My best friend was flirting with the guy i really like. What should I do?

flirt with him more!! You cant really ask her to stop flirting with him she may not even like him, some people just flirt as friends.

Well, me and my ex broke up...I'm getting over it slowly, but he wants to be friends. I'm not ready to be friends with him yet. I want to make sure I'm over him, cuz if I go and hang out with him now, I'm sure I'm gonna want him back and miss him. i broke up with him cuz he cheated but didnt get very far cuz he felt really bad and i kno in my heart he luvs me cuz no one says or does tha sweeeeetest things like he does...so ne wayz i took him back but everythin was soo different, i couldnt trust him anymore and my luv for him was fading......he says he cant handle it if we're not friends, but i cant handle it if we're friends.....what should i do? i dont wanna hurt him but he really hurt me..

your heart hurts. The best thing is some space right now, maybe here and there an IM conversation but it's just going to be too miserable for you right now to be seeing him alot. And tell him you wanna be friends just right now its going to be hard to be close b/c you dont wanna have feelings and then have your heart stomped all over. For once in your life you just gotta think about you and not him. His feelings are gunna have to go on hold.

good luck
InbOx X Me

when do girls normmaly start puburty? wat grade

6,7,8,9 USUALLY... it could be before or after but usually not on a healthy level.

xoxo
gl finding info
if you need more help, inbox me

i really like this guy. hes really cute and hes SOOO funny. but people r always calling him fat. hes NOT fat at all so its really weird. hes really cute and his personality rocks. i dont want ppl saying shit about him tho. what should i do?

Forget what people say!! Are they the ones inside your brain everyday?? If they say "shit" ignore them. They could be jealous of the connection you have with him.... ignore them and follow your own heart and listen to your own brain.

GL
xoxo

mercy me sounds familair..is it a christian band?? haha just wondering!

lol! Yes, exactly a christian band. Sound familiar?

I can only imagine,
what it'll be like
when i walk by your side

that ring a bell? I would love to talk with you. My sn's HePlayzTheGuitar, IM me any time.

I have this problem where everything i wear must match. I wont wear somthing if it doesnt match perfectly. It takes me forever to get dressed. Is this bad? If so does anyone know how i can stop?

Its not bad. I think its nicer when you match. You can't help your style. What you can do is start "contrasting" to make getting dressed easier. There are colors that kinda blend, for example, watermelon pink skirt with a lime green top. They blend really well and look cute. Pink and biege. Is it all making sense? I hope so!!

xoxo
Good luck
if you need more help, inbox me

There's this boy that I've known for a few years. We talk on email every single day, and we see each other at school.
It feels like we're just friends, but the other day my best friend pointed out that it seems like we are "more than just friends".
I don't believe that, he's just my friend. He's weird, funny, nice, creative, and lots of other things, but I don't know if I really "like like" him or not.
Can someone help me out in trying to figure out my real feelings?

could you see yourself going out with him?? It could be all in your head. Plus you'd probably realize, the fact your only thinking this after your friend pointed this out could be a hint. But hey, you guys could always have a good chance.

good x luck
xoxo

I don't love my boyfriend but I do like him alot and we're good together. The thing is, we've been together for a month and there have been a few problems to do with kissing. We both want to, properly like full on but before I didn't want to. Now I do and he knows, it's never the right time, we don't see each other out of school a lot and it's hard when other people are there. I really want to kiss him, what should I do?

Set aside a really good day when you can both go to the movies. Go alone. There's your perfect kissing time.

Good luck
XoXo
I think things can totally work out!
Good luck!!

ok... there is this guy i like. everyone says he likes me but i dont think he does. he doesnt talk to me anymore like he used to. when im around him he acts different then when anyone else is there. my mom and his mom both think he likes me but i dont think he does... PLZ HELP

Dont be afraid to ask him!! Maybe you guys can work something out. Try inviting him over to hang out so you guys can get to know eachother. Don't ever be afraid to approach him first. I think hes just shy,

Good Luck!
xoxo

WOW! That was very good adive. Or what ever it was it really helped me, do you have a screen name or anything, like for AOL or AIM, okay well mine is VonMAR2212, instant message me sometime, because i really would like to talk to you. Thanks for everything. Talk ta ya later..
~Mar

Im so glad i could be of any help. Well my sn is HePlayzTheGuitar, i just recently IMed you... hoping to chat real soon :-D ... you sound very sweet and I would love to help you with whatever needs to be helped, that's what im here for.

Inbox me any time
Thanks!!

-mel

Bare with me, this could be long. Ok well it starts off about 3 years ago, I was involved in a roll over car accident and it knocked out 2 of my teeth because i wasn't wearing a seat belt, and I was partially ejected from the car and i was stuck and yadda yadda yadda, it was horrible, and it screwed up my knee so now i've had 2 sugerys no my knee, the last one puts me in a leg brace. Anywho, Then earlier this year, i was involved in another accident(yea i know, if i didn't have bad luck i'd have no luck at all) where the driver and I and all the other passengers were looking at a murder scene when we smashed into the back of a cadillac and the airbags were deployed, and my foot was screwd up so i missed like 3 days of school, blah blah blah, so now it being early october and all this happend 3 years ago and the other one happend near the end of last year, like a year ago. So now we get to my problem. Now whenever I get into a car, I start freaking out because i think what would happen if the driver were not paying attention, so every time I see brake lights, I grab onto something and start to make noises, not quite a scream, and stuff like that, so i was wondering if that was normal after things like that have happend to me?, oh yea, by the way, my dad like to scare the crap at me by going full speed towards a wall, then my whole family laughs as i try to keep the tears in, but i dont want u guys to feel sorry for me, anywho, i was wondering if you guys think i sould seek therapy or something to get over this problem? Because these incedents have made me never want to drive. Should i try to get over my fear by seeking therapy, that is what im asking, if you could help me it would mean alot to me and i will rate you high if i like your advice, thanks in advance

I think therapy would be wonderful for you to seek. As you get older and have a job or maybe even someday have kids your going to need to drive. It's absolutely normal your scared but you need to really ask your family not to joke like that to you, tell them these memories haunt you terribly and they flashback in your mind really miserably. They'll get the hint. It's totally normal. I've had bad horseback riding injuries and it still haunts me today, but I've gotten through them, you can too.

Good Luck Sweetie!

I just wanted to know what anyone thinks I should do.
Well a few months back I met this guy who I found out taught at the school I go to. Well we started kissing and meeting up, I was never that keen but I did it anyway.
Well i got back with my ex bf and told him I had so I didnt want to see him anymore.
I know what he did was wrong as he was a teacher but Im not sure if I should tell or not. The thing is I think he would do it again.
What do u think I should do? Should I tell or not?

Definetly tell!! He's quite dangerous and even if he doesnt come back to you he could always harm some other poor girl and you'd probably feel some awful guilt. Im not trying to scare you but even if 10-15 years pass by and he just wants to find you he could, and it could ruin your life. You'll live peacefully knowing he was reported... dont be afraid to do it, you'll be happy in the end!
Good luck Hun
XOXO

Okay here's the deal: (sorry if it's long but i really need advice w/ this)

three years ago i dated this guy Dave for three weeks. after those three weeks he dumped me cause i wouldn't sleep w/ him. loser. anyway; i moved on and started dating his friend. almost three years later we're stil together. they're not friends anymore tho.

so lately wherever we go and Dave's there, he'll totaly hit on me and he won't leave me alone. if we're at a party he'll follow me around all night asking me stupid questions and completely stalking me. this weekend we were at a party and my boyfriend and i were just in a corner talking and kissing and he comes up right between us and starts a convo w/ me. my boyfriend thinks it's funny cause Dave is being such a loser. my boyfriend wants me to tell him off but i just can't be mean to someone, i've never ben able to tell anyone off but i CAN'T stand Dave. usualy when he's talking to me i just walk away and totaly ignore him but he doesn't get the hint. what would you do?

Have your boyfriend say something instead. Guys are good at protecting their girlz, plus Dave will really get the hint if its coming from your boyfriend. Wow-- if he doesnt go away you can definetly charge him for stalk. Lol.. i know it sound really wierd and stuff but atleast he'll leave you alone. I guess it depends how severely hes really been following you. So yea, just have your guy tell him. If he wont for whatever reason say it nicely. Tell Dave sometimes you feel like he purposely wants to mess things up between you and your guy and that you dont like it. Tell him all you want with him is to be his "friend" ;-)... he'll leave you alone and you probably wont have to live up to the friendship thing. Even if you were friends with him it wasnt that bad.

GOOD LUCK!
About apologizing for the length, like i say to everyone, dont worry about length of questions, i love 'em! Lol... it really makes me think hard fer once.

;-)
Hope everything goes smooth, hey if you ever need anymore help, inbox me, i would love to help you.

XOXO

13/f

The Story:
Okay I have a boyfriend who I have liked for a while, but I recently was just going out with one of his friends, but they are no longer friends. And well anyways my ex-boyfriend I really was in love with, and he broke my heart. And he only did it because he thought there was no trust in the relationship. And then he thought about it all. And 10 days later he told me he still liked me, and was in love with me still, and wants to go back out with me. And at the same exact time he told me that, my friend, well boyfriend now, was asking me out. And I said yes to him. But now my ex-boyfriend is heart broken knowing that i have a boyfriend, who happens to live by him, go to school with him, and they use to be friends. But my ex-boyfriend is so sweet with it all. He asked me once if i was thinking about "dumping" my boyfriend now, and I asked why, and my ex-boyfriend said because he really was in love with me, and hates him self everyday for breaking up with me, and breaking my heart. And I told him I think we should be friends right now, and go back out in high school, or MAYBE a little sooner. And he said what ever makes you happy, just as long as you are happy. And the thing with my ex-boyfriend, who yes i was in love with, and yes at age 13, and go ahead and call it puppy love, but i really do know it was so much more. Anyways, well my ex-boyfriend was really just the best, the only thing that really hurt me was that we didn't get to see eachother that much. And that sucked. But I managed because i knew i still had him in my life, and that made me happy. And me and him also not being able to see eachother often is a parshle reason why i think me and him should go out in high school, that way he could of maybe grown away from always having to do things, and being busy, and we could see eachother more. But....here is the problem i need advice with:

Do I stay with my boyfriend I have now,who I do love.Or break up with him and go out with my ex-boyfriend, who I was in love with, and still could be. Or do I just play it solo?

And one more thing, i don't know if i am having mixed feelings, i think i just might feel bad for my ex-boyfriend.

Some one please help me... :(

Wow. Im sry your in such a tangle, but im here to help so I'll write ya a good long one. I dont really believe you feel bad for your X. I think that relationships where you dont see eachother alot work better because you appreciate so much the time you do have together, and thats what is important. You sound so torn both ways, but just from what I hear, you were ment to be with yer X. He didnt think you guys have trust but how much more could he trust that you guys were really in love if you would break up with your other boyfriend for him. I think you should definetly take him back and give it a try. Stay really good friends with the boyfriend... I mean worse comes to worse you could always find eachother again and fall back in love or whatever but for now you are meant to be with the X. Take it real easy on the boyfriend and just see what happens. I think you'll be fine... I think alot of this is just you being nervous... all you have to do is take a leap of faith and trust everything will go well. Not that that's particularly easy but if your strong enough to come this far, you'll make it the rest of the way.

Have x Faith

XoXo
good luck hun!
Let me know what happens!

okay I have this amazing boyfriend who I know loves me very much.He has already met my mom and most of my familyand they all think he is sweet. I love having him as a boyfriend and of course I would never break up with him but I am so used to bieng hurt by guys that I am so scared that he will hurt me too. He swears that he never will but I can never be to sure of everything. I know he loves me so why am I so scared?Plz help me as soon as possible!I need it bad!!!!!
I am 13 years old and am female!!!!!

Your scared because even that small chance that he would hurt you scares the crap outta you. It's happened before and your almost prone to it now. Trust him. You HAVE to. He sounds really really sweet. If your feelings stay the same your not even going to enjoy the time you guys will have together. I think even if you guys break up, it wont be a hurtful breakup, he sounds too sweet, ;-).

GL!
xoxo

14/f. I think I have a genuine problem with crushes. I just can't stop crushing on new guys. I like everyone and everybody. My current crush count is around 9 and it just keeps growing. I like all kinds of different guys, and even 2 brothers! I also like 3 of my brother's friends! Is there something wrong with me? Is this normal? Is it possible that I make this stop? I'm so torn.

woooah. Im not sure if i read that correctly but if you like 2 of your brothers thats bad. Id see a psychologist so you can talk your feelings out. You probably dont have a stop button, like everytime you see a cute guy or hes simply nice to you you automatically crush on him for no reaosn. Just learn the difference between "crush" and "cute". Dont go crushing on someone unless he's got an amazing personality, makes you laugh, is cute, and basically the next thing to perfect. Keeping your standards high will definetly help you out-- gotta remember not a lot of guys are mr. perfect.

GL!
xoxo

ok whenever i ask a chica if she will go out with me she always says no well not no but we are really good friends the uasual thing, and i havn't asked out a girl in a while and i am afraid to get hurt again, my life seems pretty good so far, but there is this one chica that i like but i am afraid to get hurt, so here it is

how do i get her to like me and for once in my life be able to feel the love that most people feel and get a yes from her.

thnx to all

Hang out with her a lot!!! And build up some confidence. Just because a lotta girls have said no dont mean that they all will. Have faith in yourself or it will never work. Then invite her to hang out a lot, and flirt!! Drop the hints how you feel for her and if she starts flirting back, thats really good signs. Also, call her up a lot.

She'll get it ;-)
GL
xoxo

<<< Previous Advice Column

Next Advice Column >>>

humorist-workshop