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ANNOYiNG EX BOYFRiEND
Okay here's the deal: (sorry if it's long but i really need advice w/ this)
three years ago i dated this guy Dave for three weeks. after those three weeks he dumped me cause i wouldn't sleep w/ him. loser. anyway; i moved on and started dating his friend. almost three years later we're stil together. they're not friends anymore tho.
so lately wherever we go and Dave's there, he'll totaly hit on me and he won't leave me alone. if we're at a party he'll follow me around all night asking me stupid questions and completely stalking me. this weekend we were at a party and my boyfriend and i were just in a corner talking and kissing and he comes up right between us and starts a convo w/ me. my boyfriend thinks it's funny cause Dave is being such a loser. my boyfriend wants me to tell him off but i just can't be mean to someone, i've never ben able to tell anyone off but i CAN'T stand Dave. usualy when he's talking to me i just walk away and totaly ignore him but he doesn't get the hint. what would you do?
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ok U should ask him just to have sum alone time with ur b/f nd that he should remember that HE dumped u for that stupid reason nd just move on [in a nice way of course] nd if he still doesnt leave u alone make sure that if u have plans with ur b/f to not tell ne 1 bout it cuz then he might hear bout it nd that u just want sum alone time -XO0H JENN
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You don't have to be mean in order to get your point across. You simply need to be polite and firm.
Tell him that you're sure he's a great guy, but you are not interested in being friends with him. Let him know that it bothers you when he follows you around.
You are the only person that can put a stop to it. Confrontation can be hard, but think of it this way: Two minutes uncomfortable conversation with Dave, or untold minutes of agony while he follows you around or bugs you.
You can always write an email or AIM him if you don't want to have the conversation in person. Don't giggle, flinch, or give the impression you are joking - let him know you are serious. This isn't being mean, it's being honest.
Good luck.
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Hey sounds like fun..not! I think you should say something. it doesnt mean you have to be mean about it at all but if you dont say anything at all things might get out of control. and if you dont feel comfortable doing so i would reccomend asking yourboyfriend to say something...( that is what boyfriends are for ...right to protect girls!). so i hope that helps.
*Britnie
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You don't have to tell him off in order for him to leave you alone. Try telling him that you are feeling uncomfortable about the way he acts around you (i.e. "You know what, Dave, I'm not interested. Not interested in you, not interested in you following me around, not interested in your conversations. So please! Just leave me alone."). Also, talk to your boyfriend about it and let him know how uncomfortable you feel. Worse case scenario, you tell Dave that if he doesn't stop following you around you will go to the police and have a restraining order drawn up.
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I've had similar situation where the "stalker guy" used to be my best friend and plus my friend had a crush on him.
I couldnt bear to hurt his feelings, and my friend would get mad at me for doing so.
But it came to the state where he was actually scaring the heck out of me, and sometimes I would cry because he scared me so much.
And one day I realized, "What am I doing?"
I mean, here he was,literally ruining my life, and I was doing nothing about it.
He was being this big obstacle in my life and I was doing nothing about it.
So I decided, I will just tell him.
It was hard, and he got really angry at me, because obviously he thought his "stalkings" were nothing. He thought it was just expression of love and got mad at me for not appreciating them.
But I did, and now he barely talks to me anymore.
At first I felt bad, but I realized the guy who I used to be friend with wasnt the same guy who stalked me. He changed, and it wasnt my best friend I was telling off, just a really annoying stalker dude.
It's the same for you.
It's not someone you used to love you are telling off...It's someone who stalks you.
This is YOUR life, and if someone is interfering with it, YOU have a right to remove that person out of your life.
I sincerely hope my advice helps. :)
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Have your boyfriend say something instead. Guys are good at protecting their girlz, plus Dave will really get the hint if its coming from your boyfriend. Wow-- if he doesnt go away you can definetly charge him for stalk. Lol.. i know it sound really wierd and stuff but atleast he'll leave you alone. I guess it depends how severely hes really been following you. So yea, just have your guy tell him. If he wont for whatever reason say it nicely. Tell Dave sometimes you feel like he purposely wants to mess things up between you and your guy and that you dont like it. Tell him all you want with him is to be his "friend" ;-)... he'll leave you alone and you probably wont have to live up to the friendship thing. Even if you were friends with him it wasnt that bad.
GOOD LUCK!
About apologizing for the length, like i say to everyone, dont worry about length of questions, i love 'em! Lol... it really makes me think hard fer once.
;-)
Hope everything goes smooth, hey if you ever need anymore help, inbox me, i would love to help you.
XOXO
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