Hello, my name is Sam. There's a lot that I can say about myself, but if you'd like that then you could always message me and we can have a nice cup of tea together :D
I am not very old, so I might not have too much life experience, but I do like to help people. I know that life often throws unexpected blows at people, but I am so extremely optimistic. Hopefully some of my optimism will rub off on the people to whom I am giving advice. I am happy to help with anything! :)
Gender: Female
Location: California
Age: 17
Member Since: February 24, 2007
Answers: 477
Last Update: October 17, 2011
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so there's this cute guy in my class in my English class. well i decided to do a little facebook stalking and when i got one i realized that he's 22 (3 years older than me) married, and he's a pastor at this church that one of my acquaintances go to. I felt weird because i kept looking at his facebook. and in English class, i was being stupid and gave him a dirty look and he gave one back to me. then when i smiled at him later he gave me another dirty look. i did this again and he smiled at me. it was really weird. i feel so weird because i keep thinking about him like an obsessive freak. well anyways i guess i did all that because i was embarrassed and upset that i kept going to his facebook and found out that he's married and a pastor because i had a huge crush on him. lol and he got extra point for starting the roll sheet by writing his name and he forgot to put a plus so i did it. lol i don't know what to do but i feel bad. help? (link)
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Hello.
You shouldn't feel so embarrassed about this :/. The fact is that tons of people are out and about (or should I say home and alone) stalking away on Facebook. Facebook stalking has virtually no consequences because the person has no way to know who has been checking out his page. It could become a bad habit thought; like all things, it is best in moderation.
Anyhow, I feel that, if anything, it was great that you looked him up on facebook. He's a married man! This means that you can now freely move on. Imagine if you hadn't known this and if you had flirted/pursued him only to learn this information later. I'm sure it would have been more upsetting at that point. He may be attractive, charming, etc., but there are plenty of men that fit this description. I suggest that you try to see this as a learning lesson and possibly try to scope out more cute guys. I'm sure you'll find a nice single one in no time! :)
Take care
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So I'm a female teenager in high school. And I'm falling for my friend...who is also a girl. I've always known that I didn't like guys. Growing up I was never interested, never had feelings. When girls started getting boyfriends, I didn't. I just viewed them as friends.
Anyway, I have yet to come out to well...anyone. The only people that know are my online friends.
But anyway, last year I met this girl (my crush) and we became pretty good friends. I didn't see her much during summer, but once school started back up we started hanging out a lot.
She's openly bisexual. And I feel like there's just something...there. More than a friendship, but I don't know how to go about telling her! The thought of it kind of scares me, partly because I have yet to come out, and another part because I'm just afraid of her reaction.
I don't want to ruin our friendship if she doesn't like me like that.
Any advice on what I should do?
Thanks! (link)
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Hello.
So I noticed an interesting detail in your question. You say you haven't come out yet. Does this also mean that your good friend doesn't know that you are a lesbian? (I'm not sure how you define yourself so please forgive the inaccuracy.) I feel that you don't necessarily have to directly tell your friend that you are crushing on her, but that you should confide in her by telling her your "secret." This would be an indirect way of letting her know the "possibility" of a future relationship ;). You won't be jeopardizing your friendship and it'll be nice to have someone else that can relate to you! :) Plus, once you let her know that you are an "eligible candidate" the ball will be essentially in her court. I assume that, based on her reaction and her behavior after you tell her, you can judge whether or not that "something" seems to be more prominent. If she shows more positive signs then it'll be a great time to step up your flirting. Or perhaps this will give HER the confidence to mention any feelings that she may have developed for you. I also feel that having a friend who is already "out" will encourage you and possibly help you along your path of coming out.
I really wish you the best of luck! This situation makes me very excited for you! I love a happy love story. :)
Take care
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I've liked this one guy for a long time but he thinks of us like brother and sister, he knows i like him but he doesn't want to ruin our relationship. My friends say we're cute together and I want it to happen, where do i go from here? (link)
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Hello.
I don't want to hurt your feelings by saying this, but I feel that you have already answered your own question. If he thinks of you as a sister, then it will be pretty futile to try to get him to see you differently. No matter what people or the internet may say about "ways to make a guy like you," you ultimately cannot change a person's feelings for you. Attraction works in strange ways, but it is not in your best interest to consciously attempt to find ways to create attraction where there isn't any. This will only give you hope and hurt you even more in the long term. Think about it: you've been honest about you feelings with this guy and he has been honest about his. You should be thankful that you took the risk of making your feelings known, and now you don't have to worry about "what could have been." Many girls never tell guys about how they feel and they are always longingly wondering what could have happened. You are brave for having told him. Now I think that the very difficult, but also equally brave, thing for you to do is to attempt to move on from these feelings. Perhaps distancing yourself from him a bit (not to the extreme) will help you accomplish this. Don't listen to your friends because they are only enabling this crush of yours. I understand that your friends want you to be happy, but chasing him forever will not make you happy.
I hope that some of this will resonate with you and that you will choose to move on. Either way I wish you the best.
Take care
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can children go naked at the beach (link)
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Hello.
I've actually seen naked children at the beach. But when I say children, I mean children under 4 years old. I'm not sure of the legality of it, but I'm sure it wouldn't be culturally acceptable (at least not in the U.S.) if say the "child" were over 5 or 6. But if it's a baby, then I'm sure no one will think anything of it.
Take care
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im 15/m i have been cutting my wrists since age twleve. i really want to stop but i really need help i have been to therapy. but idk im just deprressed the therapy doesnt help. please some one help :/ (link)
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Hello.
I'm sorry to hear this, but I hope I can help. Why do you feel depressed? You need to truly understand your feelings in order to move on. Whether you have issues in your life with love, family, abuse, or anything else, it's important that you realize that these issues are not permanent. I know that you may be dealing with a lot of pain now, but cutting your wrists is only furthering your depression. I'm not a psychologist, but I'm sure that if you could just stop hurting yourself physically, it might lessen your emotional pain as well. Maybe you could try to find another way to release your emotions. Do you keep a journal? If not, it would be a good idea. Also, try talking to your close friends or family about your feelings. Don't let the pain build up inside of you. You are so young right now and this is the time to enjoy your life. Don't let these issues overpower you.
A few years ago I felt really depressed about an unrequited love. The depression consumed me for months until one day I actually grew tired of being depressed. I realized that there was a whole world out there that I could be enjoying, but instead I was choosing to wallow in my misery. After that day, although I was still not over my love, I was able to start moving on. Maybe the thing that is causing pain in your life isn't going to go away right away. Maybe you have no control over it. But the point here is to try to realize that all of these precious years that you are letting pass you by will never return! You'll never be 15 again. Enjoy your life and build your self-esteem right now as much as possible so that you can have a high self-esteem and many fond memories in the future. I would hate to think that when you are older you would have to look back at your adolescence as such a somber period in your life.
Right now is the perfect time to start fresh. Whatever you are using to cut yourself needs to be disposed. Throw it away in a place where you can never get it again. Hide any sharp objects or get them away from yourself. Maybe give them to someone to hide them for you. You don't have to go on living life this way. This cutting will stop the day that you decide that you 100% WANT and NEED it to stop.
Realize that your life is extremely precious and there is so much for you to look forward to! Don't let this beat you. You are young and beautiful. Try to be optimistic about life.
I wish you the best in this.
Take care of yourself
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I am no computer nerd at all but I was thinking about computers the other day, Bill Gates, and Microsoft Windows versions. I remember my cousin having Windows 98 and I had Windows XP in the past. It seems like my cousin had upgraded from Windows 95 but I'm not entirely certain of that either. I know there's Windows XP, Vista, and Seven. Anyway, what I'm getting to is my real question: When was the first version of Windows release? I mean, what year, of course...and what was it's name? (link)
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Hello.
The first Microsoft Windows version was released on November 20, 1985 and was called Windows 1.01.
This version was followed by Windows 1.02, 1.03, 1.04, 2.03, 2.10, 2.11, 3.0, 3.1, NT 3.1, NT 3.5, NT 3.51, Windows 95, Windows 98, Windows ME Windows 2000, Windows XP, Windows 2003, Windows Vista, and Windows 7. (Wikipedia)
And even between these editions there are sub-editions and special office and phone versions.
HAHA this was so interesting. I just learned a lot about Windows history while answering this question. So thanks :).
Take care
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i was just wondering, do guys run away from emotions they are feeling?
like say he is in a committed relationship and its the longest he has ever had by far and his feelings are different then the other two girls he dated, would he run away from it cause he doesnt know whats going on?
i know stuff about guys but i just want to make it certain. and if a girl insults a guy. how hard do they take it? and will they ever forgive a girl for that? or will they test her to see if she will do it again?
sorry silly questions but i need answer. thanks! :) (link)
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Hello.
I feel like your hypothetical question could be extended to women as well. Sometimes people get scared when they have feelings that are too strong and are afraid of being hurt. Sometimes they feel too much pressure. Think of people who "get cold feet" just prior to their wedding. I feel that a person who runs away from love or commitment is afraid because of some possible traumatic experience. Maybe that person's parents divorced when that person was really young. Or maybe that person was in a relationship where his partner was the one who broke his heart. Fear can be a terrible thing at times. It is a crippling emotion and can really hurt people. It is especially painful for the other person who is unexpectedly left alone. But I don't think it is accurate to call this a "male" or a "female" issues.
If a girl insults a guy, then he will probably take offense. How hard he takes it depends on the insult and his personality. Unless the insult is life-changing, happened repeatedly, or really hurt his feelings, then he will probably forgive the girl. Again, it all depends. Some guys will test girls, but that kind of behavior only breeds more mistrust. When someone forgives someone the implication is that the person is given a new opportunity to show that the behavior will not be repeated. But by testing someone, a person is implying that he does not trust that person. Healthy relationships need trust.
I hope this is somewhere along the lines of what you were looking for.
Take care
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heyy!
i need some romantic new love songs to dedicate to my man.I want the music style to be similar to we the kings and avril lavigne and stuff like that ^.^
thanks (link)
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Hello.
Should I name all the Avril Lavigne songs that I like or you already considering those?
Okay, so pop songs:
Moment like this-Kelly Clarkson
Brighter than Sunshine-Aqualung
This I promise you OR God must have spent a little more time on you-N'sync
Every Time we Touch-Cascada
Listen to Your Heart-DHT
Heaven-DJ Sammy
Sorry for the 90's music. N'sync is a guilty pleasure :)!
I think I know more depressive/anti-love songs than I know actual love songs, which is sad, haha.
Take care
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I have a mirena IUD as birth control and I was reading about it and most places have said that its 99% effective in its first year of use. I am in the second year of using it so I was wondering if the effectiveness goes down as the years go by and how effective is it in the second year. I am EXTREMELY fertile and my bf says he is too so I am curious what you all think my chances are with that in? I have heard that quite a few women actually do get pregnant with it in... is that true? (link)
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Hello.
My mother got pregnant with my brother 3rd child while using an IUD. It's supposed to be effective, but like everything else, it can fail. If you're serious about not getting pregnant, then you should consider this + other contraceptives. I'm not saying it will happen, but it's certainly possible.
Take care
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I don't know what to do with him! I found out from my bff that my bf made a facebook group thing about our relationshp. I went and red a few things on it and it is personal and nothing anybody should know but us so I told him I knew he had a secret he was keeping from me but not what it was so he would tell me or something but he didn't. i kinda thought that he posted stuff and didn't think it was bad and I wanted to give him chances to say so but he just said he didnt have no secrets so i went back to read the rest and he had made it private only so now it is hidden from me.
I guess what I am asking is if he didn't think this was wrong why did he hide it when i found out? He still denies everything and now i got no proof because i cant see it anymore!!! i have been crying about this and i feel betrayed like he has a secret life on facebook or something! should i stay with him if he isn't going to be honest and still hides things?
Sorry if this is too long! (link)
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Hello.
This is very strange. I'm sorry he did this to you. I honestly feel that there is no logical explanation for his behavior. If he wanted to post things about your relationship, then why would he make it private from you? And it doesn't seem like he's apologized or even tried to explain his reasoning with you. I do not think you should stay with him because although some might say that this isn't a "huge deal," it's still a mean thing to do and he should know the difference between right and wrong. Sweetheart, please break up with him. He is not worth all your trouble. It may not seem like it, but nice guys are a dime a dozen.
All the best
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16/f
i like this guy a lot. i think hes very attractice inside and out.
well im not the prettiest girl, but im ok. im a little heavier but im curvy.
i really want him to like me. hes laughs at things i say and he talks to me.
please name ways i can get him on my good side and ways to flaunt it.
thanks. (link)
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Hello.
Okay so I'm assuming this is a school crush but I could be wrong. I'm also assuming you have classes with him.
Now I'm going to pretend that I am a guy. Guys like girls that are smart, confident, friendly, and attractive.
*Make efforts to talk to him. It doesn't have to be anything major. Saying "hello," "what's up," "did you do the homework?" or anything else that can create small talk is a good idea.
*Tell him about your day. OMG I found a lost puppy, I found a dollar, I tripped walking up the stairs, etc. Anything that is semi-interesting/funny would work. You don't have to share embarrassing stories if you don't want to, but I like to (lol).
*Do you have a facebook? Be careful with this one. You can OCCASIONALLY "like" something he posts, comment on something he posts, ask him a question, etc. If you overdo this then it may seem like you are a bit creepy. But a little bit of attention will make him think you're nice/have things in common.
*If you see him in the hallway, class, or anywhere else, smile! :D You can also say hi, and stop to talk to him.
*Look over at him and if he sees you smile. A light smile will look cute and thus attract attention. (Do not stare at him all day.)
*Participate in class. It will make you seem smart (which you are) and will make you seem confident (which you also are.) Smart and confident girls are very likable.
*Dress cutely. Get a cute haircut. Put a bow in your hair. Looking cute will immediately attract attention. This doesn't mean that the guy will only be interested because you are cute, but it can certainly make the difference between his seeing you as a friend or more. Dress in a way that makes YOU feel confident, pretty, and flirty. Yay!
*Be nice to other people in front of him. Okay again, niceness is attractive. If you are helpful to other students in class (like helping them with the homework) or in the hall (for example helping someone pick up their things if they accidentally drop them) then he will be impressed by you friendly demeanor. Besides, everyone likes nice people, so this a good quality to have regardless of needing to impress a crush. (Perhaps you should lay off of being "nice" to other guys in front of him. He may then think you aren't interested in him).
*Ask him in question if you sit next to him in class. Or if you are able to get his phone number somehow you can call and ask for help on something. (DO NOT ask stupid questions that you already know the answer to. It is best to make yourself look intelligent. Dumbing yourself down in not cute.) Asking him to revise your work on an English paper or possibly checking your answer on a math problem with him are both safe bets. :)
Remember: People like people who like them and people like people who are like them. Being nice to him and finding common interests are the surest ways to his heart.
This is all from the perspective of a female so take from this what you will.
Take care and, of course, GOOD LUCK :)!!
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I am going to go travel to Mexico next spring and I want to be able to speak some Spanish there. I don't have to be like FLUENT but a decent amount is good. I don't want to look stupid and say words wrong so I need some audio or an instructor that can listen to me and help me pronounce the words right. Where can I find some place to teach me how to speak Spanish? (link)
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Hello.
I would recommend purchasing Rosetta Stone in Spanish. It's pricey, but I'm sure you could find a good deal on ebay. I speak Spanish fluently and have used Rosetta Stone with my friend and I find that it's a really good program (note that I am Mexican and I didn't become fluent because of the program but rather because of my family). I like to use it to learn French. The program teaches you pronunciation and is very interactive. You'll enjoy learning.
Take care and good luck
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I read some girl here talking about writing down you period on a calendar and that she used something online to "chart" her periods and so she knew when to expect them (like they predict her periods). Is there a site for period predictions or whatever? I want to chart my period too so I know when it will come. Like a period calendar online. Yeah. (link)
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Hello.
http://www.beinggirl.com/en_US/yourperiod.jsp
Beinggirl rules. On the page I linked you to it should "What's the date of your last period?" Just fill it out and it should tell you :).
Take care
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I'm going into my senior year next week, and im going shoe shopping this weekend. The only problem is, i've looked online and i haven't been able to find a pair that i like. My style is mostly girly. I have tons of flats, but i want a pair of sneakers that will match my outfits. Any ideas? Thanks a bunch :) (link)
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Hello!
My best friend is very girly and she wears white keds with her outfits sometimes. I suppose some converse or some colored vans could work as well.
I know they aren't sneakers, but moccasins are my favorite. You can never go wrong :).
HAPPY SENIOR YEAR! It's mine too~
Take care
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Hi, I am 18f and I have a boyfriend the same age. He has one type of music that is his favorite, which is metal... and so that is all he listens to. My dilemma is that I don't really like metal (I can listen to it, but I don't care for it) and the music I listen to (pop,rock,country,almost anything but metal ironically), he doesn't really like. How can we make it so that we both like eachothers kind of music so that we are both happy in a vehicle or at a party? I would really love for him to listen to some of my music that has good lyrics, soul, and a catchy beat rather than head banging stuff all the time, you know? Cuz I believe we could connect on another level if we have music that sets the mood for both of us (hard to have a romatic setting with metal music). I do know that if you play your music alot, the other person may eventually like it too... but any other ideas would be appreciated, thanks!
(link)
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Hello.
The only thing that I can think of is to find music that is somewhere in the middle.
For example, Lamb of God and Slipknot might be more difficult for you to like, but System of a Down is metal-ish and alternative-ish.
There are also 80's bands like Twisted Sister, Metallica, Faith No More, Guns and Roses, Aerosmith, ACDC, Kiss, Bon Jovi, Led Zeppelin, Quiet Riot, Alice Cooper, Black Sabbath, that are in the Heavy Metal and/or Hard Rock genre. I personally can stand and even enjoy some of these bands very much, and I am definitely in no way, shape, or form a metal-head. Heck, my favorite music is folk :P.
But isn't it nice to find someone who likes different music to introduce you to a new perspective. I say you give his music a chance and also realize that people's taste in music changes over time, so he may eventually like other bands.
Take care
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I'm a chick that feels like I was placed in the wrong body (I'm 15). At school it bothers me when I'm called by my real name and gender, but I don't know what to tell people because it would most likely be awkward for them (I'm also the quiet one). It obvious because of how I dress and act. I just don't know what to do. What should I do in this situation? (link)
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Hello.
I feel that you can do one of two things. The first would be to change your name to a male name that you like. I know a girl that shortened her female name from alexis to alex and now she dresses like a male and is a male in every sense. Your good friends can help you through this change. It may be difficult and awkward, but ultimately the change will make you happier. Do your parents know how you feel about this? Now would be a good time to tell them because you will also need their support during this. You describe yourself as the "quiet one" and although this could just be your personality, it might also have a lot to do with your insecurities? Once you feel like you are the right gender, you may begin to be more confident and social.
Another option that I can see would be to change to a new school. At a new school no one would know you and it would be a perfect time to acquire a new identity. It would be less awkward and stressful in my opinion.
Regardless of what you choose it is best that you have people in your life who understand you and support your decision. There are many websites out there for people with gender identity issues and they can very much help you.
http://www.lauras-playground.com/teens.htm
Take care of yourself and I wish you the best of luck in this. Remember that although some people may judge you for this, the people who truly care about you will stick by you. All the best
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my lower left quadrant hurts very badly and i lost my voice. i think that i might have mono because some girls on my cheering squad has it, and my best guy friend had sex with someone who two days later caught deadly mono, and he was all over me and did not mention til later that he might be carrying mono. but i did not kiss him or sip off of his cup, yes he breathed on me, and so did one of the cheerleaders that has it. i'm scared that i have it and school is starting up tomorrow and i don't want to be absent the first few weeks of school. when i was little, my twin sister had mono and so did my older sister and i shared a roo with my twin and i still never got it. do you think i am immuned to it? or do you think i caught it when i was little and showed no symptoms? is the pain in my left quadrant all in my head? my throat kinda hurt too, but not badlyyyyyy. i haven't got a fever; i don't think. and people who have mono, do they feel their spleen enlarge or ache? my sister said that she didn't. do you think i am okay? I also have bad anxiety. and go see the dr's isn't an excuse for right now, because my dr isn't working this week.. sorry... EASY 5 POINTS! love you and thanks, any answer will help me please. (link)
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Hello.
Based on your reported symptoms and especially because you were in contact with people who may have it, it is possible that you have mono. I knew a girl with mono and she had received treatment and was fine. My advice is to tell your parents about your concern and make an appointment with your doctor for next week. I know it is nerve-racking to have to wait for a whole week, but honestly, I'm not a doctor, and even if I could diagnose you I still wouldn't be able to give you medication. You don't have to tell you parents that this guy was "all over you." Simply tell them that you know that some girls on your squad have it and therefore your strange symptoms have made you worry.
Good luck and take care
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So ive never gotten my period before but this same thing happened to me like almost exactly 2 years ago (within those 2 years i had no blood or anything)....when i went to the bathroom 2 days ago and i whiped my... i saw some blood on the toilet paper but there wasnt any in my underwear so i put a pad in and a little bit more blood came out on the pad later in the day. but since that day i havent gotten any blood again! its been 2 days with no signs of blood. do you think i got my period? or no?
(link)
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Hello.
Was it actual blood or was it brown? The brown business is not a period, but is apparently a sign that you will get a period soon.
You might have an extremely light flow when it comes to your period. If so, you are very fortunate. Did you feel any cramps? This is usually an indicator as well.
Hmm, even if this wasn't your period I'm fairly certain that you should be expecting it soon. And even if it doesn't come soon, it's alright! I know first periods are exciting, but as a whole the monthly experience is a bit of a bother.
Take care
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I am sorry to trouble you, but I really need to know how to tell if the eggs I have are safe to eat or not.
Can anyone tell me how to find out if your brand of eggs are being recalled?
Thank you!
Peggy.
P.S. I also asked this question about how scared I should be if you can answer that it would be great:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=585170
Thank you again! (link)
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Hello.
My teacher was telling my class that scrambled eggs would not be harmful as it is only the raw yolks that are dangerous to consume.
"The shell of the egg may be contaminated by feces or environment, or its interior (yolk) may be contaminated from the shell or from a hen whose infected ovaries contaminate the egg. [19][20] Nevertheless, such interior egg yolk contamination is theoretically unlikely.[21] [22] [23] [24] Even under natural conditions, the rate of infection was found to be very small (0.6% in a study of naturally-contaminated eggs[25] and 3.0% among artificially- and heavily-infected hens."
The above is from Wikipedia. This might assuage your fear a bit, but I think the real question is why eat eggs at all? I mean there IS a potential for infection, especially now, and eating any eggs is risky. Just my thoughts.
Take care
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How early is it to send out someone a birthday card? I sent someone a birthday a card this week, but their birthday is not until the end of this month and the person probably wont be getting it until next week. Any advice on this would be great, thanks.
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Hello.
I don't personally see a problem here. It is better that the card arrived early than late, right? Maybe the card will be a nice reminder that it will be that person's birthday soon, thus making them more excited and anxious for their birthday. As long as you aren't sending the card months in advance then all is well.
Take care
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