Wife, mother, loyal friend to the end, model, classic car collector. almost 30 years old, and seen alot in my few years here on earth. People usually come to me for advice, and i give in return grounded, realistic answers.
Gender: Female
Location: San diego
Member Since: January 18, 2005
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Last Update: June 30, 2016
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adviceman49
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My friend told me she liked this guy. Me and her crush started talking a little, and I started to like him. I always thought he was attractive even before she liked him, I just thought he had a crappy personality until I talked to him. Should I tell my friend or should I keep it to myself beacause he probably doesn't like me anyway? (link)
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I agree with dragon here, you should let her know that you also think hes cute but that your willing to let her have first shot at him.
Tell her that if he doesnt like her or things dont work out that you want to try with him after and see if you still like him too. If shes your friend she'll be greatful that you allowed her to have first shot at him.
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Ok so everyone is attached to their parents when we're little but for me and him our moms were always taking the easy way out and would take off and leave when ever they wanted luckily for me I had my dad but he never met his dad . I was always super attached to my mom but then something had clicked in my head that she wasn't the person I thought she was that was at around 11 and I am now 14 but hes about to be 13 and is too attached to his mom because he doesn't want her to leave and he's really obsessive with her whenever out aunt takes us out to get our minds off of stuff all he wants to do is call his mom and when she doesn't answer he just keeps on calling and literally bugs her until the point where she turns off her phone and says it's dead when it isn't i. Our whole family has tried to talk to him that he needs to be less attached but he always gets angry and thinks we don't want his mom around him when it's the opposite this is how it's been his whole life but recently I have realized it more because what teenager turns down hanging out with his friends to spend time with his mom Ive told my sister that he might need to talk to a shrink or something but I'm afraid he will just get mad and think were calling him crazy
So I want to know is how can I get him to understand that being with his mom every second of every day is not healthy for him (link)
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ok i think whats going on here is because of the fact that he never met his dad and didnt have that extra person in his life like you did that you need to cut him some slack on this issue. He probably feels like his dad left and his mom might possibly do the same to him on day too so hes afraid to lose her but doesnt want to admit it.
He might be feeling like shes all he has (even if thats not true his feelings have obviously been ingrained him in since he was very young and has probably secretly been feeling this way since he was little) what needs to happen is his mother needs to talk to him ALONE about this and she needs to tell him that she will never leave him, that she loves him and is always going to be here for him but that everyone has lives they need to live and he needs to go out and do the same.
This might not seem like it has an impact at first but as he gets older he will remember this conversation and as he grows as a person he will want his own independence. He IS still young though so this degree of attachment isnt THAT uncommon. He will grow out of it, but make sure that no one makes him feel like hes stupid or acting like a baby or making him feel down about it or he will always think he needs to shut himself off to you all emotionally.
i say lay off of him for a while and tell your family to do the same. the only person that can fix this issue is him and his mother talking it out. either that or he'll grow out of it and you just need to give him some time.
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Me and my family are going to a movie today.
Problem: My dad wants to see the new Hunger Games
I want to see Big hero 6. Which movie should i pick to watch? (its my turn to pick)(btw im under 13) (link)
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what about that new angelina jolie movie?? or the Cinderella one? if its your turn then pick something YOU like?? ; )
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Im really young and I would put my finger inside my vagina and then scratch it.Then I would smell it. I thought I was going to get pregnant and I started worrying. I had 2/10 symptons of pregnancy and Im too young to have a baby. Also I don't have a boyfriend and I don't think I carried sperms. All I know is that I don't wash my hands before fingering myself. Please, I have been worrying and stressing out. (link)
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you cant get pregnant from fingering yourself unless you put some male sperm on your finger and then put that finger inside you RIGHT then and there.
you should put your fingers inside yourself unless your hands are clean and your nails are clipped you could really injure yourself down there.
If your young like the other person said then your periods might not be regular yet because your body learns to slowly over TIME start producing the appropriate amount of hormones each month as you get older. ive never experienced irregular periods because with puberty (even though i was a late bloomer) it came on strong and hard with heavy flowing periods every single month since i was 14. I did however have friends that had sometimes more then one period per month or go sometimes months WITHOUT a period at all, and they were not sexually active people. so if your not theres really nothing to worry about and theres no possible way you could be pregnant.
your fine ; )
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So for those of you who replied to my question about my depressed girlfriend, I realized when I saw your answers that I definitely hadn't given enough information. I'm not stupid, I am not trying to take care of her all on my own. In fact I have straight up told her that "this is hard on me and I cannot do this alone. We're going to find additional help for you" and we did. Trust me, I am very aware that she needs a series of professionals to help her out, and so is she. She has been seeing therapists and psychiatrists and counselors for years, and I'm pretty sure she's been on every type and every dosage of medication for her illness that there is. She does not encourage me to ditch school at all, in fact she was mad about it when I did. But that day, she'd told me that she might kill herself, so I kind of had to prioritize. I ditched CHOIR, you guys. It wasn't a huge deal. Her parents are not very good people, and they often accuse my girlfriend of being lazy when she struggles to get out of bed in the morning or they tell her that she inconveniences the family with her need for extra care. If anything, her parents (particularly her mother) tend to make things 100 times worse. They denied her of a day therapy program/support group thing and they don't really see mental illness as actual sickness, so they're no help. Also, I am EXTREMELY aware that she could kill herself, because she has tried to before. I was the one to talk her out of it. I realize that it's going to be excruciatingly painful for me if she does ever go through with it, but I love her unconditionally and I will stay by her side to support her while I can. I have a lot of faith in her, and I see that she still has hope. I'm not going to give up, especially when she needs me most. She can get better, and I know it will take a lot of time, but she deserves the world and I am going to try with every fiber of my being to make hers at least a little brighter every day. I guess that all I really need right now is some extra advice on how to deal with my emotions in this situation. I know I can't "fix her" or anything, but I can support her, and I'd like to do that in the best way that I possibly can. I'm sorry about any confusion. Thank you.
(link)
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Lets slow your roll a little here. no one is attacking you for what you did, and i was not condemning you for having ditched a class (no matter how dumb the class was) im was just trying to use that as a vessel to get you to see that bigger picture here.
YOU came to US for advice and then gave vague and general details that didnt really help any of us to really give you what you needed.
Im glad that your girlfriend is still getting or trying to get the help she needs for whatever it is she has (which you did really go into too much detail about either) It really helps to be as specific as possible on here because we DONT know you and we're trying to get the clearest picture of you and your situation and all we have to go on is what your telling us. nothing more.
Its good to see that you are dedicated to her in the way that you are and being the support system she needs, but i do agree with grandfather.
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Hi. Okay, so I have other friends too besides my bestie of besties. So, I have Jamie, my #1 sister, but I also have like 2 other best friends. But it's SOOOO hard for me to hang out with my other friends because Jamje always gets butt hurt and pissed off. Then she ignores me and says stuff like "maybe they should be your new best friend" or "you never hang out with me anymore" when I'm like, ALWAYS with her... it's been going on for quite a while and I just want to have fun with everyone without losing friends along the way... HELP!!! (link)
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I agree with the other poster and also that she wants you all to herself, and is treating you like a piece of property and thats not ever ok.
Its OK to have more then one best friend, because no one single person can REALLYYYY be your everything in life, thats just not how life works. Teens and youngsters seem to think it is like that but its not, and if your around each other TOO MUCH youll get tired of one another and start fighting all the time and im sure neither of you wants that either. (you might also mention that to her)
She might also be envious of you or certain aspects about your personality she wishes she had but doesnt (LIKE the ability to be friends with lots of different types of people) and she might be treating you badly because of it.
tell her that people have lots of different types of friends through out life and thats ok, its normal to grow in and out of people sometimes. You both also have lives that you need to live separately as well and you need to live yours, with or without her, so she either needs to jump on the normal wagon or your going to be forced to have to move on without her, and just tell her that youll always care for her but that its not fair to expect you to ONLY hang out with just HER all the time.
if shes saying shes just acting this way because she doesnt like this or that person then tell her "well im sure you have friends that i might not like too but you dont see me attacking you over it do you? why?? because im OK with you having other friends"
You see, we all have certain people in our lives that we work harder or lesser to keep in our lives for one reason or another. for example, you might have a friend that your best friend "doesnt like" for some reason, but YOU like her because theres something about her personality or maybe its her creativeness, thoughtfulness, or welcoming positive attitude that attracts you to her. Where as all your friend sees is a threat to her friendship with you and refuses to see that she too can be friends with her if she wants and so she picks at her personally and finds petty things about her to complain about when really thats not what it is at all. this is called an "agenda" or "motives" to hate someone from the start and it comes off as judging and mean when in reality shes just jealous of something about her or you or that you might have something more special with her then your bestie does with you.
If you want to try to make her feel better you could even offer to invite her to go places and hang out with you and that other friend. Tell her that you want to show her that its ok to have more then one really good friend, and encourage her to find other friends as well, be happy for her when she tells you she met someone new and they had a good time somewhere. this could be an attempt to make YOU jealous but if you just act happy, then her attempts will fail and she will either give up and stop acting like this or she wont understand why her methods of sabotaging your feelings arent working. ; )
girls can be very jealous creatures, so keep an eye out with this friend of yours from this point on for a while until you feel she can be trusted fully. just dont tell her that.
good luck!
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M really worried if using two condom caN also make me pregnant?
Can you tell me in how many day i can know that m pregnant or not ?n now can you tell me if my period should b in 28 feb but still m not having it.i have my periods always on a week or ten days late so wen will i get it if m not pregnant? how many possibilty is there for me that m pregnant after using two cndm n it wasnt broken? (link)
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if the condoms didnt brake then theres no way you could be pregnant. you would have to get his semen inside of for that to happen. your probably NOT pregnant, your period is just late as usual.
Really though i would stop using two condoms if i was you, they can rub together against each other and tear each other and THEN youll end up getting pregnant. Its also just wasteful. lol. ; )
The soonest you can tell your pregnant with the at home tests you buy at the store is 15 days after your first missed period from what i remember.
just buy plenty of lube when you buy condoms and there will be no chance that the condom will brake because theres no rough friction to tear it. also him pulling out while wearing the condom when hes about to finish is always helpful as well.
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Why it bleed this (6) time even i was no longer virgin and is this because of fast process or Use of two condom?Is it dangerous if it bleed ?and can this result pregancy?and it results late period?how long does it take to have regular period if u r not pregnant? (link)
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your period is every 28 days. you need to write down when your period comes every month so that you can keep tract and that will tell you if you have regular on time periods.
It could be that he was going too fast on you and didnt make sure that your body had time to create enough natural lube to make it not painful. buy some lube and tell him to slow down.
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Hey, guys! I'm a 17 year old female and I figured since you all are caregivers yourselves, this would be a good place to seek advice for this particular issue...
I've been dating a girl for about 6 months now, and I love her with all my heart. However, she is severely depressed and I've had some struggles coping with it. I try my very best to do all I can for her. I keep her on the phone when she's feeling particularly down, I listen when she needs to rant or express her emotions, I will drop everything to run to her side if she is in a bad place (this resulted in me ditching two classes once), and I even wrote a short story in which I characterized her as a superhero once.
However, I am a person who very easily can become too involved with others' problems, and I'll often turn their negative emotions into my own by accident. I've been feeling down and on edge lately, and constantly worrying and caring for my girlfriend has drained me. She is an amazing person (very artistically and academically talented, as well as sweet, funny, and extremely strong willed), and none of this is her fault even in the slightest. I'm just worried because I'm afraid that my exhaustion is causing me not to take care of her as well as I normally can, and also I'm concerned about my OWN health. Any tips? (link)
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I have to agree with the other poster here, you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else.
She missing something in her life thats causing her to maybe inadvertently try to get it somewhere else and she hasnt realized that shes impeding on other peoples lives because of how down shes feeling and this isnt ness. her fault but it IS the truth and that truth is what a good person like you deserves, even if it comes off hurtful.
Try to take emotions out and set them aside for a moment. Think about the future and how much time and energy you put in her, will you feel let down if later in life she still hasnt gotten better and you put all that effort in? or you got in a fight and no longer know her and look back and thought about how much class time and things put aside for her because she couldnt stand on her own two feet through certain things? what im talking about here is resentment. do you see where im going with this?? im sure you DONT want to feel that way, but obviously only YOU know yourself so i cant predict how you will feel later down the line but in a relationship two people have to meet each other halfway to make it work.
When my husband and i were first starting to date ((im blushing now because this was well over ten years ago and we're married now with a 3 year old) lol. anyway i was living at home still and we was in college, and he called me saying he wanted to come get me so we could hang out in the middle of the day. Well i knew he was supposed to be at school and i asked him why arent you in school right now??
He answered me and said "oh well i wanted to be with you more and its not THAT important" he basically ditched classes to come be with me instead. Now tell me was that the right thing to do?? NO. if your friend cares she would feel the same way in most instances and encourage you to GO to school and NOT miss any classes on her account because your future together is important.
I told my now husband over the phone that i was NOT pleased at his stunt and that he will never do that again for me if we are to stay together as anything more than friends. Do NOT ditch school for someone because later dont the line there could be resentment deep down and it could effect the relationship. Needless to say i still went out with my boyfriend that day but i made him promise me that he will NEVER do that again for me and that it is important that if you are in school for something because you are so gifted that you GO because not everyone gets that chance in life to shine.
needless to say he was more then impressed and happy that i took the initiative to make that choice and put him before myself for HIS betterment. Your girlfriend should want the same for you too, and say "no dont leave school for me i will grin and bare this until you can come over after your done" someone wanting you to do that is them showing you they are putting you before themselves even if you wanted to come see them because they know how important you are and that you need your schooling one day.
I dont know what exactly your girlfriend is going through because obviously you wernt specific enough but she shouldnt be making you feel this way even if shes not trying. you are obviously drained and the best thing you can do for her is encourage her to seek help if things really are as bad as your saying. She might be scared but you seem like a loving person so offer to walk right up there with her to the office when she has appointments and sit outside the door while shes in there talking to the counselor. Offer to call FOR HER if you have to, and tell her theres nothing to be scared or ashamed of and that we all need support at times.
She needs more then what your capable of giving her sweetie. your only one person. dont feel bad.
good luck ; )
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Hey there i'm a 22 year old women but when me and my husband proceed to have sex and he enters. It hurts around the rim of me. Like a burning feeling but only when he enters. I can continue to go on but if it comes out and puts it back in it hurts again! Is there something wrong with me? (link)
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sounds like you need to be using some lube or he should be slowly going in and out to make sure you have enough of your own natural lube inside you for him to proceed deeper first. try buying some lube.
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I am 20 years old n have sex on 22 feb With my bf after 1 year. He always used two condoms but this time he used same n i bleed even i was not no more virgin .now m depreesed thAt my period is late like 15 days. So wat is reason for my late period? M opregnant ? (link)
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ok using two condoms can actually UP your chances of getting pregnant because they could slip off so i wouldnt try that. one is good enough and if you find they are braking then that means you need to buy some lube because condoms just dont break. thats rare.
your period could be late because your stressing over things so much. if your scared you pregnant go with your bf to the store and buy some pregnancy tests. your late enough now that it would be able to tell you. or go to the doctor and have blood drawn and tested to see if your pregnant.
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I've known this guy for 3 years now, we were friends first and now we're dating. We've always liked each other and always had a spark. Problem is he has a baby mama. He has a 5 year old child with her and sees the kid once a week. He told her about me and everyone he knows, knows that I'm his girlfriend. Here's what I don't like: He usually sees the child with the baby mama. Like they'll both go to the arcade or both go out with the kid. This bothers me, am I wrong for feeling this way? I'm having suspicions he might be cheating although he hasn't done anything to make me feel this way and I have trust issues from previous relationships. What should I do? (link)
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ok first off, lets not punish another guy for what the guys in the past have done to you, its not fair to him and you could be self-sabotaging your relationship with him.
Secondly, im sure their broken up for a reason and why would she be ok with being with him if she knows hes with you now? try to put feelings aside here and think logically.
Ask yourself "as a person do you think his baby mama would lower herself after having broken up with him to carry on something KNOWING full well hes also with you?" has she met you? have you gotten any vibes off her that are off?
He could be still doing things with her and the kid because they want to try to provide the kid with a sense of normalcy in family still and that they both love him equally and that hes not just a dead beat father because they are no longer together anymore. As long as their trips are strictly about the kid and nothing more then theres nothing wrong with that. What MIGHT be a good idea though (if shes ok with it and they truly have no feelings for each other anymore) that he bring you along sometimes. It would be ok though if you were there sometimes and acted like "a friend" of his.
While you are there though it would be best if you wernt publicly affectionate with each other though just so it doesnt confuse the kid. the kid is young and if it is both their first child then thats always going to be something special that they will share with each other no matter who comes and goes from their lives.
they still created a person together and their mutual love for that little person will always be something they have in common and thats something you have to make sure you can come to terms with or else its time to move on with someone else that doesnt have a kid.
If you truly feel you have grounds to believe that he still has some remaining feelings for her then you need to talk to him about it. start collecting info like things he says in your mind for later. Does he ever talk about why he broke up with her? or do you have to bring it up first? does he ever talk about being frustrated with her? or talk about "why it would never work"? things like that coming from a guy that broke up with her for a good REASON should tell you alot about how he feels.
How does he act when he comes back from his visits with her? do you ever ask him how it went and what they did? (your allowed to ask since you "care about him and just want him to have a good time and make his son happy") see?
you have some pull here you just need to learn how to use it. If you act like your happy for him that hes spending time with his child and trying to make things work so that he can do whats best for him then he will let his guard down and be more open to talking about things because he wont fear that youll get mad or be unhappy about something he did.
have you ever heard of killing someone with kindness? try it. show him why hes with you and not with her anymore, try to act happy when hes planned to go see them and ask if you should pick up dinner if he will be home in time, or if he'll be eating out? try to act like your trying to please him because what your actually doing is getting information.
Most people arent likely to be mean if you start off with a good kind nature, offering to pick up dinner before he gets back so you can eat together, or saying "oh but i was planning on us doing this or that on that day?"
make it look like your trying to work around his visits with his son, and mention that your making an effort here but that you need him to meet you halfway on this and tell you whats going on with certain things. ; )
he'll be more inclined think that he wont be able to get anything past you because your working so hard to maintain the relationship so cheating would probably not be the best idea because you come off as being "really on top of your stuff" here.
make it look like you want whats best for the kid too, and that you want to be involved because you care, and youll get even closer and once you can spend more time with them too going out places youll be able to get a better read on whats going on if your really that suspicious. most people cant carry on a secret relationship under such circumstances and theyll either snap and just tell you because they think youll eventually find out anyway or youll catch them really doing something.
good luck ; )
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I'm 23 and she's 25.
My girlfriend has been really depressed and stressed lately and I just hate seeing her this way. Before us, she was married then got divorced and due to the divorce she was left with around a $12,000 Credit Card debt. She's paying it off every month, it's just she barely has enough left over to treat herself and our two dogs. She loves to spoil our dogs first before herself. She has a full time job but just doesn't pay enough and she's already on the look for another job. She's living with me and I'm handling the house bills and sometimes she contributes as well.
My thing is, I hate seeing her depressed and sad. I really wanna help her with her debt but she won't let me. So far to me it seems it to be a pride thing, her pride is very admirable but I just hate to see her suffering. I want her to be really happy again and show that I'm there for her and have her treat herself and the dogs again.
So far I think I've broken the barrier down a little by giving her $200, I basically told her to take it and that I didn't need it, but for some reason I don't feel that much good about and I kinda feel like I shouldn't of done that? Why is that?
Also she doesn't deserve this debt. During the divorce she took on the whole amount because her ex-husband threatened to take away her dogs or "put them down" since he didn't wanna take on half of the debt. That just angers me and I just want to make that burden go away.
How do I help her with her debt? Do I set some money aside for her? Pay it off? Or let her handle it since she's already been for half a year now.
I don't want this affecting our relationship in a way but at the same time I don't want to affect it in any way either if I decide to help her. Like, I really want to but is it right? (link)
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Ok what it sounds like here is she feels shes mature enough to think " i got myself in this and ill get myself out of it and i dont want to burden other people with this" She could be feeling like late down the line if your relationship really is serious that she doesnt want there to ever be any resentment over it or for it to come up during an argument that "you paid it off and if it wernt for you....." do you see where im going with this??
She sounds like a strong willed woman who is able to take care of herself shes just stressed about the whole situation.
I say if she doesnt want you to help her then instead of her pampering the dogs, YOU do that. Maybe say that you WANT to and that it means alot because you love them too. play to her emotional side on that one and then tell her "well i also want you to have more money to push towards that bill so it can get paid off faster"
she may not like right now that your trying to be her knight in shining armor even though thats very admirable of you. ; )
maybe just try to make OTHER things in her life easier so she doesnt have to worry about them and only has that debt to worry about. She sounds really focused on getting it paid off and thats a GREAT trait **cough** wife material** lol.
shes obviously trying to be serious about bills and money and thats rare with quite a few females cause they dont know how to budget and spend and pay bills alot of the time (at least from my experience)
I realize this also may be a hard conversation but after all they ARE dogs and will live if they arent spoiled all the time. So maybe cutting back on spoiling them (depending on what that is for you) grooming, expensive types of food for a while might be a good idea, they will live. As soon as the bill is paid off she can go back to spoiling them, but right now just showing that your on her team by trying to take care of everything ELSE so she doesnt have to would probably be the best way to go.
good luck ; )
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Hi! I'm a 15 year old girl and I'm super insecure. I know that that's normal throughout puberty and just in general but I feel like my insecure-ness goes beyond what is considered "normal". First if all, I compare my self to every girl I see. Every. Single. One. I look at the little curves of their bodies and what bones stick out where and the shape of their feet and compare it to myself. If I see a girl (whether it be at the store, in a picture, on social media, etc) who isn't considered traditionally "pretty" because maybe she's a little or a lot overweight or has a crooked nose or smeared makeup, I'll try to find similarities between me and her and stare at her for half an hour and continue to compare us to back up my opinion that I'm ugly. Occasionally, I'll get so concerned with my appearance that I'll give myself panic attacks (keep in mind that I usually only get panic attacks from OCD or Social Anxiety). I spend hours in front of the mirror trying on tight-fitting clothes and picking out my imperfections (like the little bulge of my stomach, or the relative flatness of my chest, or my "thunder thighs"). I'll get up close and be disgusted by my pores and pimples and the bump in my nose. I feel like I'm not worthy of having a boyfriend or girlfriend and often wonder why my friends hang out with someone as fat as me and always feel like they're embarrassed to be seen with me. They've never said anything like that but my mind knows that they're thinking it. Why do I feel like this about myself? How do I stop hating myself? (link)
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ok it sounds like you really need some counseling here. It IS very natural at your age to compare, we all do it even through adulthood to some degree but what your talking about sounds way too extreme.
You have to try to love yourself BECAUSE of your imperfections, you are unique and NOT like everyone else and thats what makes each and every person on this earth special to some degree and different. Imagine if we were all the SAME. how gross would that be?? lol.
you need to speak to your school counselor and tell them how your feeling and that your feeling really conflicted about some things and need to talk to someone. they will understand and if they cant help you they will point you in the right direction.
good luck ; )
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My family has been living in this three bedroom house for 3 months. We started noticing problems like the walls in every room are wet and water is always leaking from the Windows. We called the property owner and he said that they didn't know why the house was like that and they don't know what to do. A lot of water was leaking from the bathtub into the bedroom when people used the shower, they fixed the tub leak, but the shower still has problems.
The mold is every room and its ruining the furniture, Black mold and some white fuzz is getting from the walls to the beds. We wipe it off and it comes right back. I moved my dresser and discovered all this nasty black and white mold eating through the dresser. Its in every room.
We have complained to the property owner multiple times. They said that are house wasn't the only one having this problem. Can't afford to move. The walls are always wet and are starting to puff out. When it snowed last week water was leaking from the ceiling, but we cant see any holes.
Can my mom get her money back so we can move from this place? What can my mom do about it? (link)
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omg get out of there asap! black mold is a serious issue!
you all could get really sick! that place sounds like it is BEYOND repair and whoever rented it out to you is a slum lord. they HAD to have known things were this bad and pursued renting it out anyway. i would call the health department in your area and have the house evaluated. tell them your situation and see if they can send someone out to check out the house.
Then get a written statement from them, take a copy and send that to the landlord and let them know that you will be forced to take action if this is not addressed, you dont care how it gets fixed but this is a danger and if anything the house should be condemned (and im sure they dont want that) ; )
once they see your serious they will most likely perk up and think "ok these people are not to be fooled and i better get on this or ELSE"
did your mom sign a lease? have her look over it and see what it says about doing the initial "walk through" of the house before you rented it. its in those areas that you may have a problem because if she signed the lease AGREEING that she would except the place in the "as is" condition that it is or was at the time of move in, then shes screwed. She wont have any footing in a legal battle if she signed that paperwork after she walked thru and looked and still agreed to live there with it being the way that it was.
(im from cali, and ive rented quite a few places in my time and know the process here and its pretty specific) so yours might not be but these are still some things you could ask your mom about and make sure to get proof of before doing anything further.
Also, did your mom take pictures of the place before you moved in so that she would have proof of the condition the place was in at the time of move in?? cause thats ALWAYS a good idea.
start taking pictures of everything your seeing now and documenting it too.
trust me on this, if your seeing things seeping through the walls and mold on YOUR side of the dry wall then i can GUARANTEE YOU its ten times worse on the inside of the wall. Think of that saying "where you see one roach there are at least 100 more in the walls hidden that you just dont see yet" its like that.
for now all you can do is try to beat it back with some vinegar and spraying it on the walls but honestly it sounds so back that i would advise you move out there now. dont wait.
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I was married 5 years one child together I h aven't seen my .ex husband in a year and half. He's dated several girls since we split up he left because I confronted him about not paying the rent next I knew he was done walked away took our only vehicle. Etc. I ended up moving north and had to start my life over. During the marriage he stole from my father he's stole from my son he'd lie about taking my son to his baseball practices etc. don't get me wrong we have a ton of good memories with the bad. I miss him and I would take him back in a heart beat but why.. he has said he would do anything to
make things right (link)
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you would take him back for a few reasons but only you know them. ill name some and YOU take some time to look inward and ask yourself if this is why:
your scared because youve been with him for so long that hes all you know and you dont know how to start over
your scared to start over or think he got the best years of your life already and no one will want you now (which couldnt be further from the truth its never too late to begin anew with someone else)
He was a huge influence on you (understandably) and you either dont do HOW/dont want to/ or think your too weak emotionally to be strong enough to stand up on your own two feet without him. (see reason number one on this also)
hes the father of your child so you think you owe it to him to stay with him.
you think theres still something there worth saving. which at this point there isnt because hes made it blatantly obvious that there isnt by dating other women, and your in denial.
you think youll never meet anyone else like him and you have to try to salvage any tiny pieces of what you had.
the list could here could go on and on, and because none of us really know you we cant tell you WHY and know for sure that it would help you. only you can answer that. answer your self why and write down the first thoughts that come into your brain, dont think too much into it just write, and youll then have your answer.
keep the paper. then get some more paper and try writing down all the good and that bad things about him. alot of times just knowing that your writing down more bad things then good is enough to make someone realize it wasnt worth it.
Could there be a chance here that you dont feel complete without him??
if so i think you should try to seek counseling, or just take some time away from men in general for now and try to work on yourself. Get some self help books, go to forums for healing after a divorce and tell your story there. There are others there who will be able to help support you through this difficult time.
Try also focusing on your child, getting more involved in your not already, read, garden, take up hobbies, work out. Just keep your mind off all this and take some time for you.
good luck sweetie youll make it ; )
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For As Long As I Can Remember, I've Always Had Bangs. They Go Straight Down My Forehead (Above My Eyes). When I Was Younger, I Would Just Grow Out My Hair And Cut It Every Now And Then. Now, I Cut It Quite Short (Or Medium Length?) To Probably 2 or 3 Inches Above Where My Elbows Are. And I Added Short Layers. I Personally Think It's Cute And Casual, And I Get Compliments On It Too. But I'm A Freshman In High School Now. Is It Weird To Have Bangs For That Long? (link)
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thats ok, but since you have the length you also have the chance to try new different hairstyles that GO with bangs!
look online for different hairstyles that you might like to try if you DO want something different? check out pinterest. type in bangs, and long hair styles and just see what comes up! ; )
youll figure it all out
good luck.
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I am an 18-year-old female. I've been in a relationship for 6 months. earlier in the relationship my boyfriend was a big flirt with a lot of girls (I later found out about that). he ended up cheating on me and I found out about it. I decided to stay with him but I can't seem to move fully past it. I'm not sure what to do or think through all of this. what should I do? (link)
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you obviously dont fully have ALL of his heart or else he would never be able to even conseive of cheating on you, or wouldnt put himself in a position to where cheating would happen.
id like to know HOW the cheating happened. sometimes a guys friends will take him out and then put him in a position to where he doesnt have a way out. Ive had enough guy friends to witness this actually happen and i had to help put a stop to it before it got out of hand.
if he WILLINGLY went out and met up with a girl by himself then that means theres no room in his heart for you and that your not a top priority.
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Hello! I really hope this question doesn't offend anyone - I have very bad health anxiety.
One of my classmates is HIV positive. They were handing me something and scraped my finger with their nail. I didn't bleed. I know they bite their nails (so there might have been saliva on their nails), although I'm not sure if that's relevant. I checked online and all sources say that you cannot get HIV from a scratch, but I'm still extremely anxious about it.
It is too soon to get an HIV test, but I am really freaking out. Moreover, I don't know what to tell my boyfriend. We are long distance and I'm not sure if I will see him before I can get tested. I'm afraid of telling him about my "possible" exposure because he is also quite anxious about STDs, and to top it off, I don't think that I have actually been exposed. I just cannot stop worrying. What should I do?
Any words of advice would be much appreciated :) (link)
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ok i think your taking this a LITTLE further then it needs to go. you dont have hiv just because of this and no blood was drawn so i think your safe.
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I don't really know that my guy likes me or not but i think so that kind of he likes me ......... But sometimes he just shows that he hates to hell and sometimes he just turns back looks at me....... i seriously don't know what to do plz!!!!! I am from INDIA (link)
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if he isnt showing you he likes you then you should leave him. you should demand better for yourself as a person and as a guy he should be trying to show you he cares. if he says he DOES care he just doesnt always know how to tell you or show you then SAY to him "well i need to here it im sorry but thats just how it is when your dating."
Women need to hear and be SHOWN that they are loved and cared for, if he refuses to do that then i think you might want to move on.
good luck
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