I love helping people. I was a psychology major in college with a minor in family and child development. I love trying to problem solve and have a way of reading between the lines. I'm in a wonderful marriage (it has taken alot of work and alot of ups and downs) and have survived several family crises. I can often speak from experience. Ask me anything, I'm here to help.
Gender: Female
Member Since: January 18, 2005
Answers: 38
Last Update: January 19, 2005
Visitors: 4623
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ok there is this guy i really like and apparently he likes me too but he wont go out with me because he doesnt like my friends..... i dont know what to do because i cant get over him but at the same time i wouldnt be able to hang out with him and my friends at the together
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Loose him. If he doesn't like any of your friends than he's actually dissrespecting them and in essence disrespecting you to. Friends are forever boyfriends come and go. Let him know y;all are a package deal and if he chooses you he chooses your friends to.
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ya my friend all of a sudden ignores me and barely talks to me anymore..and she ditched me and ditches me in the halls..and forgets bout me..and we use to be bffs till xmas break..and then she talked behind my back..what should i do.. (link)
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Honestly make her talk to you and at least explain why she acting so chidish. Why was she talking about you? Part of this is just being a teenager, she will outgrow all of this jeuvenile stuff. But in the mean time aither try to talk to her in a very honest conversation and see how that goes. If not well, ditch her for some nicer, a little more mature group of girls. Life is to short to deal with all that jr. high-high school crap. take control of the situation.
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Me and my boyfriend have been going out for almost 4 months, and all we have done is make out. I told him before that i want to do more n he says that he feels the same way. But he never has done nething about it. im ready to have sex like i really love him but i dont know waht to do. Please helpp
-- me (link)
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You are just too young for sex. I promise, there are alot of issues that come with sex that a 14 or 15 year old is really not ready for. I lost my virginity at 18 years old...And I realize now that I wasn't prepared for it then. It is such an emotional attactment for girls and for boys it's just banging another girl. The emotional baggage means nothing to them. Wait until you know you are ready! I mean really know. Wait for the perfect guy that deserves to have your virginity... I know you love this boy, but just think it through. Sex is a BIG deal. It should be one perfect time with the one perfect guy..Just think about it.
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I can't make up my mind as to what style I want to wear everyday..one day I will want to be all nice and dressed up...you know, stiletto shoes, a cute sweater, nice pants from Express..the next I'll want a grungey, hippiesh Urban Outfitters look...the next I'll want cute and preppy and so on...
How can I set my style, and if i don't want to set my style, how can I incorporate things from my wardrobe so that I'm not spending a fortune on tons of looks. (link)
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You don't have to have a "set" style. Look at Sarah Jessica Parker. If you've seen her in magazines, she has worn everything from overalls to Ballgowns. And she looks completely different every day.
Also Preppy With feminine is a great combo. As is Grungy and feminine...And Hippy can be mixed with EVERYTHING!
i.e.low slung worn out jeans with a floral cami or tank and a button down shirt tied around it.
or wear your nice pants and stilettos with a casual tank top (or T-shirt) and a denim jacket.
It sounds to me like you know exactly what you are doing. You are expressing all of your different sides... Fun, sporty,feminine,smart, and sexy....
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my bf wants me to record myself on tape of me doing anal on myself untill i have an orgasm but the thing is i can't get anything thicker than my finger up my arse and i do it for about five minutes and i don't get to the point of orgasm.
is it just because i'm not doing it for long enough or do i need to put something bigger in.
please help.
signed allover
ps. if a boy does the samething will he still get an orgasm (link)
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1st of all. This is quite strange.
#1 Why is your boyfriend get turned on by that.
#2 Don't ever recodrd anything on tape for another guy. You guys might break up and that recording will be all over the internet.
#3 No a boy cannot orgasm by putting some thing in there
#4 I'm still hung up on why this turns him on.Anuses shouldn't really turn a straight guy on in this way.
#5 And if you're not getting turned on by it, then quit!
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hey im a 17 year old girl i have a boyfriend how is to much with me but i think hes a woosse... in the way that if im not with him every minute of every day he gets bitchy... if i ask for a night off he bitches... cryies you name it... he does it.. and it just makes me feel bad... and he wins... i feel like im in jail... he says he dosnt mind but the next day he says i hated it and makes me feel bad like i dont what to do... hes driving me insane... and when i try talking abt it he just makes me feel bad... i need help (link)
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Ok well here it is. You need to break up with this guy. He's totally insecure and controlling.He should want you to enjoy life and be happy. Boyfriends are supposed to be fun and supportive. I promise you, this will only get worse. He's manipulative(using guilt trips to play on your sympathy). And controlling and manipulative is not a good combination. There are plenty of fish in the Sea and this one needs to grow up a little.
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I have two friends, or I think they are my two friends.. they are always leaving me out.. like I'm just there for a good laugh or two everyonce in a while but they can cast me aside like an old toy that's lost it's shine. Everytime I make a friend I'm either left for someone else or end up giving up on the whole thing entirely. When they are around me they act like I am their sister or something.. but then they will go off to do things alone.. and they never invite me. I always invite my friends other friend, I always try and include them.. but no.. I'm the third wheel all the time.. v_v I need some help on what to do.. do I stay with my friends.. or should I try and find some new ones.. (link)
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These girls don't appreciate you. And you shouldn't let them make you feel like this. Move on to some new friends. Find some that deserve you. Maybe your old friends will miss you and be willing to change their ways. But if not, you've got a whole new group of friends who are sweet to you.
Good luck!
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I'm 21 and dating a guy right now. He reminds me of an axboyfriend of mine that died. He was my first and my first love too. This new guy reminds me of my ex so much. He acts the same, has the same mannerisms, dresses the same--as in neither of them ever wore blue jeans---and I'm falling so hard for this guy. I'm afraid of losing him again. I think it's a sign that I was supposed to meet and hook up with him. We're taking things real slow..and that's because we like each other so much...what's your imput? (link)
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Do you like him because he reminds you of your old boyfriend or in spite of that. No matter how close the match is everybody is different and it wouldn't be fair if you just liked him because of who he reminds you of.
Make sure you are in love with the total package and not just the similarities. Your wise to take things slow.
Good Luck!
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I have this friend that I have been there with all the time. I wanted to ask him out but I don't think I've ever had a chance, been nothing but a friend and someone to free load hw off of... So, he asked one of my best friend out.. It was really wierd because, I was happy for him and her.. and everything, but I was angry and cursing myself for not taking a chance because I could just ask him after they broke up. She made some excuse that she was too busy to go out with him and he was completely crushed. So I left him alone with this, because well.. I'm his friend and I wouldn't want to just aggravate things further. Now there is some girl that is a cheerleader going after him.. She always has short flings with guys and is very capable of having a time to get a guy in her house and do things. I really don't think this is what he needs right now, and I don't want him to be even more depressed because then I will have to wait even longer for him to be ok for me to ask him out again.. *sigh* it's all so very complicated and I just hate this. I always forget what I want to say around him, feel nervous.. gah.. It's really funny because, he just doesn't see it.. like I never have a chance.. (link)
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Let him lick his wounds for a bit then if you feel the time is right, start to let him know how you feel.I think this is not too too complimented. Get over your fears. He could already like you too. You will never know unless you put yourself out there. But don't wait too long,,,,,another girl will surely be in the wings.
And if this doesn't work out for you, then there will surely be another boy waiting in the wings for you. (there probably already is :) )
***** Allie
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i am so confused rite noww! Im goin out with this kid, but im kind of gettin bored with him and he is getting bored with me i can tell! And my best guy friend likes me! I just found out but i dont like him in that way. Then, my ex - boyfriend from like the beginning of LAST YEAR says he wants me back and i do but my friends tell me i shouldnt go out with him cuz there was a rumor he cheated on me with a girl from another town ..i like some kid in my class but i dont even know if hes single and i dont want to let everyone else down so what do i do?! thank you!! ♥ kelsey (link)
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See this sounds like so much fun to me! Young Love. It's cunfusing, exciting, and a little stressful. First break up with the first guy. That should be easy because you both want out. I'm pretty sure about that!
Now and this is where the fun comes in who to go after next. Kelsey I'm gonna tell you something that most people probably won't say....Go after both boys and see how it goes. You'll find out really quickly how you feel about the X boyfriend but I think you should explore the new boy to! Why not. Goog luck Kelsey! Keep me posted. This is so interesting!
* Allie1
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ok so i'm 14 and haven't been on a real date...or been kissed. i'm starting to think that something is wrong with me. what should I do? (link)
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ENJOY YOUR YOUTH!! You should think "those boys are going to have to wait for me to WANT to go out with them!
Honey nothing is wring with you AT ALL. 14 is young. I promise you will start dating when you are truly ready for it. Most girls start dating @ 15 and some @ 16. Don't rush it. Enjoy your friends.
I can tell from your question alone that you are articulate and intelligent. You will be fighting the boys off soon enough. I promise!
Allie
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ive been going out with my boyfriend for a long time. he never pressures me or disrespects me. but the other day in the movies he started touching my boobs which is really unlike him. then apologized throughout the whole movie for doing it. we went out to dinner and i flipped out on him and he started CRYING. this morning at school he decorated my locker saying "im so sorry i love you" with hearts all over it. i found out that he stayed up all night making it. he was crying all day in school, and he wrote me a long apology letter. everyone says im overreacting. should i get back with him because i really want to... (link)
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Well it's certainly not the worst thing a boy has ever done. If you like him alot give him another chance. He made a mistake, apologized for it, and seems genuinely sorry. Give the poor guy a chance. He probably got a little carried away, and if he is that upset, he probably won't try that again. Not any time soon anyway :)
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I need help finding a webiste to order a bathing suit from because im going to Florida soon. I live up north in NY so they dont really have the swimwear in stock in stores yet. I've tried askjeeves and google searches. Does anyone know any good websites? I dont know why..but when i went to wal mart. com and searched for swimwear..it showed there was nothing in stock. This was weird because dont wal marts down south selll swimwear? of course..! so if you could give me a website for walmart where i can buy a bathing suit from there that would be great also. (link)
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Bluefly.com is great! So is Nordstroms.com. Search on Google for Resort Wear instead of swimwear.
Good luck.
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No matter what I do everyday when I come home from school I am always unhappy. Im happy in school I laugh and everything but for some reason when I come home everyday the same house seems depressing. I dont really like my family and since im young as my mom says I dont get to go out as much as Id like. What do you think is wrong with me and what should I do?
P.s. I've talked to my guidance conselor and shes awsome but her talks arent making me happier nor are they helping me.
:( PLEASE HELP
Jacki (link)
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I'm about to say something that is going to seem oversimplified but it's so true. Sometimes being happy is a choice. You have to find something to do at home that makes you happy. Like bringing friends home from school, art, dance,music etc. Have you talked to your mom about this? Is your family mean or do they just not "get you"? I always felt like my mom just didn't understand me, but as I've gotten older, I have found that she understood more than I ever gave her credit for. Try talking to her about this. You may be surprised with what she has to say.
If it doesn't go well find someone else in the family(even a cousin or aunt) that might be able to help you figure this out.
Good luck I hope it gets better.
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I need advice about what color eye shadows would accent my hazel eyes the best. I have medium brown hair and medium toned skin if that helps. I would really appreciate it, i rate high. (link)
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Ok first, put on a light champagne (pinkish,silvery,gold) color on the bottom of your eyelid(close to your lashes) and right under you eyebrows. In the middle (the crease) sweep more of a darker coppery color.
Use a VERY dark brown eyeliner or a dark plum.
But most importantly is and eyelash curler! use it before your mascara the quickly put on several coats of very dark brown or black mascara.
I have hazel eyes. So I understand your pain :)
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(sorry for the length) Ok my boy friend and I have been together for roughly seven months. A week before we started going out we would stay up till like 4 or 5 in the morning talking with each other. Now he seems to be more interested in a comnputer game than in me. When we're both online at the same time he doesn't seem to want to talk to me much. Well a few months back his friend sent me this conversation they had about me and it really hurt me because my bf said some very hurtful things about me. I asked him aobut it and he had stayed home sick the day that conversation occured and was on a lot of medicne and he blamed it on that. After I read that conversation I thought my heart broke. I want to tell him that I love him and I want to know if he feels the same way about me, but I'm kinda afraid of what his response would be. What should I do? (link)
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Do you really believe him? You believe this medicine thing? He is lying. I can tell you that with 100% accuracy. Tell yourself that you deserve better. Because you do.Do you really want to compete with a video game? You have cause to be scared about his response because I guarantee that you will not like it. This guy is not worth it. Tell yourself that you are worth more than this. Than set this guy free!
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My twin sister and I argue about 40% of the day. I don't like fighting with her, and lately I've been getting so mad at her I get destructive. I used to cut myself- (embarrassing, but true)- and I can't help but think that may be problem- destruction makes me feel better. I'm not sure. Can anyone give me ideas on how to channel my anger differently? (link)
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First let me tell you that this is a serious problem. You shouldn't be embarassed at all! This is more common than people realize. My guess is after you cut yourself you feel some sort of release. You really need to talk to a professional about this.
As far as channeling your anger differently, you need to do some response stopping. When you BEGIN to get angry you need to stop everything and walk away. Go for a run, call a trusted friend and vent, write in a journal or anything else that can help you. You must stop yourself before you get to that "point of no return" Also talk to your sister. What are y'all fighting about? My guess is it's usually the same thing over and over again. That frustrates everyone. You and your twin need some seperation. Get your own identity.
But the cutting is a big deal. PLEASE tell someone about this. It's nothing to be ashamed of. And there are people that can help. In the meantime go to Google and look up "Self Mutilation". Just so you can understand it a little more.
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Me and my "boyfriend" have been goping out for more than 5 months, Im not sure how long but, it seems like were just friends! I mean were we good friends before we dated and now it seems like were jst friends! I know this one guys likes me but I dont wanna break up w/ my boyfriend because I dont want to break his or my heart and if we did break up it might effect our friendship!! Please help! (link)
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If it feels like you are just friends to you ,then chances are it feels like that to him to.If that's the case, you will still be able to be friends. Talk to him about it. I've learned that good communication can clear up almost all confusion.
And if you want to go out with this other guy, then you are not "in love" with your boyfriend. The great thing about being young is that you get to date all these different people so that you can learn what you do and don't like in someone.
But talk to him!! It works everytime!
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I work at a restaurant and there are some really nice guys there that are about 20-25 years old. a lot of them have been kinda flirtin with me and i told my mom! my mom said that i'm not dating them! should i obey or not? i'm 17 and I'm a female and she said i should only date 17, 18, or 19 no men over 20! (link)
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This may not be what you want to hear but, your mom is the boss and I'm sure she has her reasons.Next year you will be 18 and you will have a little more independence. So just sit tight, and trust your mom.
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Me and my family have been spliting apart this past couple months, my mom left my dad and found someone else. Im not sure how to accept this because it seems like she left my dad to be with him.but here lately my dads been tryin to but all the pressure of his on me and trying to make me feel bad about it and it works i dont know what to do about it though. (link)
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You're dad doesn't need to pull you into this. This is a mess, but it is not your mess. He DESPERATELY needs to go to couseling and learn how to deal with this. Feel free to tell your Dad that this is all everybit as hard for you as it is for him and that him pressuring you is only making it worse.
I am so sorry that your mom found someone else. I know how horrible this must be for you! Does your dad have brothers or sisters? Find someone that can talk him into going to family counseling with you so that y'all learn how to work on this together.
Good luck..I'm so sorry.
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