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I can't controll it
My twin sister and I argue about 40% of the day. I don't like fighting with her, and lately I've been getting so mad at her I get destructive. I used to cut myself- (embarrassing, but true)- and I can't help but think that may be problem- destruction makes me feel better. I'm not sure. Can anyone give me ideas on how to channel my anger differently?
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Write in a journal, take a bath, go running. One way you could be destructive and yet creative is perhaps start a project...try building something, like a really pretty photo frame, where you have to use nails and stuff to nail it together. When that's all done, put a picture of you and your twin sister in it. You chanelled your destructive behavior into a worth-while project.
-Amy
If you have any more questions, please leave them in my inbox:-D
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Have you ever tried expressing yourself through writing or something? I know a lot about how you feel because I have a twin sisster and we argue a lot and I use to cut too. Try finding something you are really good at..like drawing or writing or singing or what not. it has helped me a lot. plus i have been put on some sort of medication that has really helped too....i really hope i am helping...
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There is a therapy where you put a rubberband around your wrist, snap the rubberband whenever you feel the need to be destructive. The sting usually is enough for a while until you can slowly wane yourself off of it. After that I suggest a diary is a good place to pour all of that anger and feeling into. Also screaming into your pillow a few times usually helps me.. You can beat this, dont give up. :) if you need anymore advice just ask me.
~Sarah
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Well when me and my sister foght i grab a pillow and scream into it or i grab a stress ball or i hold on to a pillow real tite and try to 4get about it hope i helped
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Write in a journal, take a walk, scream into a pillow. All of those ideas from other advisers are excellent. Two others: call the crisis hotline and see a counsellor and/or professional. Cutting yourself is a sign of something much deeper, much more painful. Destruction makes you feel better? You really need to see someone fast, talk with someone fast. Are you on a good communication level with one of your parents? If so, talk with them and tell them you have got to see a counsellor? Can you talk with a teacher? Same thing. Can you talk with a school counsellor? To It!
All I'm saying, honey, is that you really need to confront your fears and troubles and start making sense of them before your cutting of yourself develops into something more destructive and terrifying. Journaling will help during the process and taking a walk is always a good breather, but talking with a professional is the best. Hope I helped and keep in touch if you need to.
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First let me tell you that this is a serious problem. You shouldn't be embarassed at all! This is more common than people realize. My guess is after you cut yourself you feel some sort of release. You really need to talk to a professional about this.
As far as channeling your anger differently, you need to do some response stopping. When you BEGIN to get angry you need to stop everything and walk away. Go for a run, call a trusted friend and vent, write in a journal or anything else that can help you. You must stop yourself before you get to that "point of no return" Also talk to your sister. What are y'all fighting about? My guess is it's usually the same thing over and over again. That frustrates everyone. You and your twin need some seperation. Get your own identity.
But the cutting is a big deal. PLEASE tell someone about this. It's nothing to be ashamed of. And there are people that can help. In the meantime go to Google and look up "Self Mutilation". Just so you can understand it a little more.
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The first thing to do is rid your room of sharp objects that would cause you to want to cut again. I know destruction might make you feel better, but if you are ever home alone, turn on your most favorite song in the entire world reallllllly loud. Then just sing along until you can't sing anymore. Listening to music or writing poems or stories also helps. Get involved with clubs at your school and go to the Y. Do a sport to keep you occupied. Getting involved with clubs or a sport will keep you away from your sister if you need it. I also suggest that you talk to a trusted adult. I know it sounds stupid, but find a really cool teacher you know so you can talk about the issues you and your sister fight about.
~Hope that helped! n.n ~
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Cuting your self is never a good way to handle things. Try talking to someone about it, Maybe a best froined or someone else really close. If it helps, try talking to her personally. Just lay yours problems out on the table. It might be really hard, but sometimes its the only way to end problems. Hope i could help. Kelly!
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When you feel the need to start cutting instead of cutting your wrists, cut at a block of wood. That way you'll feel better. Listen to music write poems watch tv. Try to ignore your sister. I had the same problem with my brother so eventually I just started ignoring him if he would argue with me for something. It works =c). Hope I helped!
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I'd need to know a little more about the situation before giving any real advice...Have you seen any professional help for this? Anger usually comes from fear. So if you can figure out what it is that you are afraid of and get to the root of it, you can then probably get rid of the anger. What happens that you get angry? What are you fighting about? What leads up to the fight? These are the questions you should ask yourself. Once you get a handle on those you can deal with your problem. It's hard to deal with anger once you're already angry. You need to cut it off at the pass before it happens. That's my advice.
John
(bobcohen5309@yahoo.com)
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Well, I also have plenty of brothers and sisters in both of my households. Maybe instead of becoming destructive, as you have said, you could write down everything that troubles you in some sort of private journal. Then, later you will probably look back and see that what you were mad at was probably not too big of a problem. Maybe you can also try just not getting mad at your sister, for instance, if she is purposely antagonizing you, you should just ignore her. The only reason people like to mess with other people is for attention, if you dont give her the attention she wants, maybe she will leave you alone. I hope that this may help in some way,
Sincerely,
Alyssa
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Well I fight a lot with my older brother and dad. And I understand why you would cut yourself cause I mean I did that a few times. But really its not the best way to handle your anger at all. Now what I do is try to just not say as much when we do fight. I go to my room and listen to music, write things that are bothering me down, talk to someone (like a close friend) either one of those would help. That is what I do. So I hope that helps. If you want I would like you to talk to me sometime. Email me at blondehottie@gmail.com! <3 *MWAH*
-hanna
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try write down your angry, scream in a pillow, punch a pillow or if its really bad call the youth crisis hotline at 800-448-4663
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try seeinq a therapist or talkinq to your sister or friends about it .. just qet help from someone and don`t continue hurtinq yourself instead of facinq your problems .. that is no way to deal with anqer .. just simply ask a councler or friend for help ! qood luck !
xOox
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you need to talk to your sister and figure out why you argue!!!!
if you ever need something email me!!!! good luck
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