How to stop yourself from going to far. Even though you love them its not the right time yet but I'm not sure its going to be that simple to stop from having sex.
One thing my older sister told me to try when I was younger , was to masturbate several times before I went out on a date and it worked most of the time. If he's really pressuring you and you want to make him happy, you can try giving him a hand job. Most guys are happy as long as their having an orgasm they didn't have to do on their own. Another option is to try and be around other people as much as possible and keep the alone time to a minimum. If you have any other queations, please feel free to ask me. Hope this helps and good luck.
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18/f
I was in a relationship with Dave, for six months and we just broke up yesterday. Before going out he promised me the world and he said I was his dream girl. I wasn't over my ex so it took us awhile for us to get together [he tried for a year] but after getting together I realized he was everything I ever wanted in a guy. He could make me laugh like no other and he wanted me as badly as I wanted him. And most of all, he showed me what it felt like to truly be in love. Over the span of our relationship I caught him in multiple lies. Early on he messaged girls and called them beautiful but he apologized and I knew he truly meant it then. However, as our relationship grew, and my love for him grew, his lies became worse. He started using pot again, and I don't like it at all! But he still did it. And two nights ago he complained about being extremely tired, yet he left my house and texted an old crush and asked her to get high with him. He never told me, someone else did and it took him hours to admit it. Then he started yelling at me because I wanted to be friends with an ex, and broke up with me. I'm so heartbroken. I feel like he lived a life I didn't even know about and I was in love with someone I never knew. I don't know what to do. I don't know whether I should move on. I don't exactly know what I'm asking, other than what would you do in this situation? I love him so much. But he's hurt me so many times. I don't want anyone else but I want to be happy too. Please help me figure out what's the best thing to do.
I'm afraid you're in the classic situation of "you want your cake and eat it too". You want your guy and you want all the other stuff that he can't give you. I'm sure he cares for you but not unconditionally like it should be. I believe he may want you if you were able to live his pot smoking life but you've made it clear you don't approve of that life style. So he was able to seek out another companion who approves of his actions and leave you behind. You should not have to change who you are or what you believe in to make someone happy. In the same respect, you can't expect him to change just to make you happy if it makes him unhappy. If he was truly in love with you, he would not only stop smoking pot and talking to other girls but most men who are in love would die for that person. That's the kind of relationship you should be in. I'm sorry to say but you should let yourself heal from this relationship and then try to move on and find a new one. I hope the best for you and I hope this helps.
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Hi I asked you a question about the hj bj..
I will definitely sound like a rookie here by asking this ..but aren't you supposed to use some sort of lube when giving a hj? Do you have to? Do you ask the guy what they prefer to use? Cause can't you use like lotion or even spit? And also, isn't it difficult because you're not facing the same way he is, your doing it from the other side. So wouldn't it be easier to have him lay down?
And should I tell him I've never done it, or just do it and see what he says about it?
No, you're totally fine for asking. I wouldn't recommend the spit for a hj but the lubes are a great idea. Then after a few times of getting some experience, you can ask him what type of lube he likes. To start out, I would recommend regular baby oil for a lube. You can lay next to him to give him a hj but you have more control when you're kneeling in front of him. That way you can use both hands and stroke his sac while you're stroking him. Now when you're ready to move on to the bj, you can use your natural saliva on his penis and you don't need to spit, that's only in porn. Also you don't want to go hard and heavy but slow and steady. One thing that will drive him crazy if you can tolerate it, is to let him cum in your mouth. You don't have to swallow but let the cum drip out of your mouth along the sides and base of his penis. I hope you let me know how things turn out and good luck.
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20-female.
So, I've never given a guy a hand job or blow job before. I've never had a serious relationship ..maybe this is why? I've never been comfortable enough? But I've had sex before & I love it. It's pretty strange. Anyways I would be up for trying this I'm just embarrassed because I've never done it before! How can you tell a guy that you've never done this without sounding like a complete idiot? Whenever there was a time I had the chance to give one ..I just couldn't try because I was embarrassed (of course I've never told the guys I've never given one) I've been talking to this guy for a while and I feel we will start dating soon. So I don't want to mess it up with him. I have a feeling he think I've already done basically everything with a guy. So when we do start getting physical, how can I let him know that I've never done it but would be willing to try. Would it be a turn off that I never have done this before?
Any advice on what I could say ..please?
Of course the best time to try either of those things would be that time of the month when you're not going to have regular sex. No guy is going to turn down a hj or bj even if you don't think you're very good at it. The best way to get things going is to start with the kissing and then tell him you'd like to take care of him tonight. While you're kissing him, pull his pants and underwear down and slowly stoke his penis. After you have gotten him hard, push him down on the bed or the couch and keep slowly stroking him. After a few minutes he should be ready to orgasm and you can pick up the pace and most guys love to have their balls stroked at the same time. This should be enough to send him over the edge. You can try the same technique at another time when you're ready to use your mouth. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask me. Hope this helps and good luck.
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so i'm a teenager in desperate need of money.. i mean its not desperate like i absolutely need money, but i would just like to earn a few buck so i can buy some things for myself like a nice dress for a dance.
I'm not really sure how to raise money without getting a job. I can't get a job because i'm already so busy, i wouldn't have the time. Babysitting is out of the question because where i live, there are no kids. and my parent's don't like the idea. i was thinking about selling some things on ebay? (things i don't use anymore like playstation or movies or books) but i have no idea how to sell anything on ebay. can someone please tell me how? or give me other ideas how to raise money? please no soliciting either. thank you!
18 years old girl.
E-bay is a lot of work and does require a checking account or credit card and you have to open a paypal account to accept payments. If you can get through all of that, you have to take good pictures and describe your item properly. Then you have to figure out the weight of your item and put a reasonable shipping cost (people are turned off by high shipping rates). You'll need a printer to print out your postage from paypal to have proper coverage in case of fraud. If you can manage all of that then your ready to list. If you do list some clothes, the best way to do it, is in lots. So, instead of individual items, you would list 4 or more of the same thing. Like 5 tops from hollister or 3 jeans from A&F. If you do decide you like to sell things, you can hit the local goodwill or salvation army and find similar clothes cheap and sell them in lots on e-bay. Hope this helps and good luck.
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i dont like it when boys finger me- i never ever enjoyed it.
they do it in the period hole (i know thats where there soppose to)but i really never got pleasure from it.
when i finger myself i just do the clit, i never touch that hole.
how do i enjoy getting fingered by guyss i really want to!
I'm guessing you're a bit younger so you may still have some growing to do down there and it may not be sensitive enough to enjoy. The other possibility is that the boys fingers are small and short which won't give you any pleasure. I know you probably want to make your bf happy by letting him finger you but if you talk to him and let him know that it feels better if he just rubs your clit, I think you'll both be happy. Boys usually don't know what feels good on a girl, so any information you give them will be very helpful. Feel free to write again and I hope this helps.
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i'm currently a criminal justice major in college and am looking into the FBI or GBI. i understand they do background checks for these types of jobs. i got a misdemeanor citation for underage possession of alcohol when i was 19, paid my fines, and served probation. would something like this prevent me from getting in to the FBI or GBI? other than that i have 2 speeding tickets, but have never been arrested or anything like that. any help is appreciated!
I'm not sure what state you have to wait 5 years to have your record expunged but where I'm from, it's only a year. Go to your local municipal court and get the proper paper work and pay the fee and within a few months, it'll be cleared. I'm not sure about going directly into the FBI but I know that you'd have a better chance if you have military or police experience first. Even if you get a part time or some type of community service job through your local police department, it will look good on your resume. Plus the more involvement you have with local law enforcement, the more chances you'll have with making friends with someone who may have the right connections to get you in. Hope this helps and good luck.
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My boyfriend is living at my parents house, with no job. he takes care of our baby until I get home. But always gets angry in the morning bc he doesnt want to get up so he trys to make her sleep more when she should be unswaddled and eating cereal. I am lucky to have a family business to work at, so that is how we make our money. Problem is, he isnt really looking for a job at all. and he is planning on driving to another city with my car 3 times a week for school. which is no biggie, but we need the money for gas. When she was born I was so happy at home waking up with her in the morning, playing with her all day. Now im not allowed to look at her before I leave bc she "might go back to sleep". This cant be good for my daughter. Lately i find myself sobbing bc I am the one who shuld be home or even working part time. I did everything. He only cleans his area, never does laundry or wash bottles. and never gives her cereal. She loves him to death, but he is taking the role as mommy and sucking at it. I basically just dont know what to do. If i say anything then I am "a stupid bitch". I dont have to say a whole sentance before he starts saying "omg just stop your being crazy stop stop" like im not kidding you, i come at him calm..."hey...maybe you should get up with her shes ready to play" "omg shut up you dont know anything" God i dk what to do. I love him to death but he can be so mean, and my mom is going broke and he is always talking crap on her and her boyfriend bc they are always up our butts wanting to see the baby...he talks about my whole family...they are kind of annoying but they are helping us so much and he is so ungrateful. but he can be so sweet....i dont remember the last time he was but I know its in there and I just want this to work out so bad, I dont want the advice telling me to leave I want to know how to fix this. please, im so depressed and i cant handle it im bawling right now i just want to hold my baby and she barley even likes me anymore. this was not how it was supposed to be and hes completely oblivious.
My guess is that he's really depressed and doesn't know how to express it properly. Of course most men don't like to talk about their feelings and will most likely deny being depressed but if you can find an outsider to talk to him, he may open up about what's really bothering him. It's very hard for a man to feel like a man if he's not working and providing for his new family, especially since you're living at your parents and he's not working. I know you don't have a lot of money or time but try to make time for a cheap night out once a week or every other week with just the two of you. Being away from the parents and the baby will give you both a much needed breather and hopefully can start falling in love again. Plus, you may be able to get him to open up about his feelings when no one else is around and try to be open about his feelings and not get to defensive if he's negative toward you or your family. Just let him spill and get it out and then you can calmly let him know of your concerns without making him feel like a jerk. I wish you the best and hope this helps.
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i never enjoy getting fingered
how do i enjoy it?
i hate that i cant get pleasure of it.
(fingered in the period hole)
If you're not enjoying it on your own, then you probably won't enjoy it when someone else does it. Typically your body needs to be aroused before it can enjoy vaginal stimulation. So if you can slow things down and have him do soft kissing or light touching over your body before he goes straight for the fingering, you may enjoy it a little more. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask me. Hope this helps and good luck.
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This summer I went on a diet and lost 40 pounds. I ate healthy and exercised. I'm not eating a ton of junk food or anything now and i havent gained any weight back but i'm not losing weight anymore either. Everyday I tell myself I'm going to start my diet back but I never do it. I weigh 146 and I really want to lose just 25 pounds.How do I get back on my diet?
Sometimes your body hits a plateau and can't move past it unless you start doing something different. If you're exercising a half hour a day then you need to do it for an hour. It is really hard to cut back on foods you really love but one thing I did was to allow myself 2 cheat meals. I had something good (or bad..lol) on Tues. and Fri. nights and I cut back on my carbs the rest of the week. For me it started with the shopping cart because if I never brought anything bad in the house, then I couldn't eat anything bad. Hope this helps a little and good luck.
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This is pretty long, I have a lot of things I'm needing some help with here. If you aren't ready for a bunch of insecure teenage rambling, turn back. :)
Well, I live in a town of maybe 10,000, which by some standards is small, but my folks are looking to move to a town that's in the hundreds when it comes to population.... That's a big jump.
I'm a 16 year old girl, born and raised in the "country" part of the city, but I've always been half and half. My friends are city, my family is country. I'm like a hybrid. And because of that, I don't have a clue how life will be for me in what some have called "red neck paradise."
I speak kinda country and own old, hand-me-down plaid shirts, yet I wear Chuck Taylor's.
I listen to all kindsa music, not just country.
I like the outdoors, I wanna hunt, yet I have no talent for shooting a gun, and because of that I can't protect myself so well in the woods so I'm always inside.
I like sewing and cooking if that counts for anything, but I just.. I don't know. I don't even really know who I am, but I'll be moving to some small town full of people who've led a life with one another that I've never experienced--farm life. Don't get me wrong, I've grown up with a garden and we used to have chickens before the dogs got to 'em, but I've never rode a horse (If only we'd had the money when I was younger, I've always wanted to..) I've never been within three feet of a cow...
I just don't know how I'll fit in. It's like on the surface, at first glance, people there might think I'm not so different from them, but get to the meat of me and I have no experience in activities that are their life, and some activities they may find fun, ya know..?
At church my youth leader says she finds me to be the kinda girl that could fit in just about anywhere, but my brother says I'd have a time of it if we moved to some small southern town because I'm so "different." Not bad, just different..
..I don't even really know what I'm asking for here. Sorry it's so long, I'm just hoping someone, even just one person, will read this and get a clue of what exactly it is what I need help with! xD Haha. Have a nice day. :)
I believe no matter where anyone moves, they have anxiety about fitting in, so don't worry, you're not alone. So, there's good news no matter what happens. If you fit in and you like everything there, life will be good. If you don't like anything or anyone, then you've only got to tough it out till you turn 18 and then you can move away and start your life over. Just remember to be yourself and not what anyone wants you to be and you'll always be happy. Hope this helps and good luck.
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I just got out of a relationship where we were planning on having sex. He had me looking forward to it, and now i have no one? I dont know what to do.. all i have is fingering myself. I enjoy it,. but i cant get a toy cause my mom finds everything.. helllp?!
I waited till I was 18 and was so glad I did. I had a few friends that did it with random guys or a bf they had barely knew and they became the slutty/easy girls after that. So, even if you find a bf soon, I would recommend waiting till you're sure he's going to be there for you afterward. I remember what it was like wanting a toy when I was younger and I would find candles or some vegetables but you have to be very careful to make sure anything you use is very smooth. Anything that has a rough spot can cause a tear inside and do some major damage. If you have any other questions please feel free to ask me. Hope this helps and good luck.
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Our brother's wife is overbearing and mean at every family get together. She goes on and on about how wonderful she is, how she does everything right while at the same time being mean and spiteful to everyone around her, particularly the children in the family. She takes over and acts like she's the one in charge every chance she gets. And she thinks nothing of making hurtful, spiteful comments. None of us say anything and continue to tolerate the behavior because we don't want to alienate our brother (who isn't much better than his wife). I say it's time we tell this know-it-all bully that we've had enough. If she doesn't care who's feelings she hurts then why should we? What's the worst that can happen? She stops talking to us? Big whoop I say. I just don't want it to be me who finally blows my top at the next family function while everyone sits by and acts like her behavior doesn't bother them. We've all discussed the situation and agree that she's become unbearable.
I'm guessing that the family functions are at your parents house. If that's the case, the family needs to tell them of your concerns. If they don't want to address it in fear of hurting their sons feelings, then the rest of you need to make a seperate date for a visit. The brother & his wife can go on one weekend and the rest of you on another. That should send a clear enough message to your brother that you don't approve of their behavior. Hope this helps and good luck.
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You just answered my question about his mom thinking we're having sex when we aren't. The only problem with driving somewhere is we're usually with his friends and I drop them off about 4 houses down the street, so it's not easy to just drive somewhere or leave really early because they all don't want to or let alone understand why we want to. Sometimes we do drive off somewhere but not very often. I just don't think what we're currently doing is bad. Our bodies are designed this way for sex and back in the times of the bible when everyone waited till marriage they were our age not 25. So for us to be waiting is a really hard task and I think its a really good thing. I just want her to see that but I'm not sure how to tell her that and dont know if I even should because if she wasnt suspecting anything and I'm just being paranoid then she might start suspecting for no reason.
A lot of parents probably think when their kids have a bf/gf then they're having sex. I'm a little curious just how far you've gone with this boy because if you've given him a bj or a hand-job, then his mom might consider that a form of sex. Or, if he's been down on you, that could be considered a form of sex also, even though you haven't had him inside of you yet. If he's scared to talk to his mom and you're a little scared too, then the both of you may want to sit down at breakfast or lunch some day and just start talking about random stuff and work your way up to what you need to tell her. The stuff you do tell her doesn't have to include everything you've done but maybe a pg version instead of the r rated one. Now about your friends that hang out with you. Have your bf tell them that his curfew got changed to an hour earlier and then you can drop them off and have the extra hour to drive somewhere more private and you can enjoy your time alone and still have him home early to make his mom happy. Hope you let me know how things are going and good luck.
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18/f and my boyfriend is 15
Well me and my boyfriend decided we would abstain from having sex. We've been dating for 7 months now and most of the time everything is great. While we may not be having sex we still do other things (pretty much everything but actual intercourse). His mom has come home and seen us messing around in my car before he went in the house and just told him later that she understands how it is but he needs to wait to have sex and he said we were so it sounds like problem solved. Well not really because he's been a few minutes late for curfew lately and apparently the other night she told him to "be careful in what he chooses to do because some things you cant take back" i think he thought she was talking bout curfew but i instantly thought she was talking about sex. Thats what it sounds like to me. I dont know if she saw us messing around again or what but what do i do to convince her that we arent having sex. It's hard enough to abstain so cutting off everything just wont happen. I get that he's only 15 but he is way mature for his age and is a really good guy. I guess im wondering if i should talk to her? I really dont want to but if i have to i guess i will. I think he should say something to her but i just dont know what he could say that will convince her to trust that we are abstaining.
I dated younger guys when I was your age because they always seemed to treat me better than the older ones. You should try fooling around somewhere away from his house and make sure he gets home well before his curfew, so she can start to trust you a little more. If it won't bother you. you can friend her on facebook and send her a private message that may put her mind at ease about your intentions. If you have any other questions please feel free to ask me. Hope this helps and good luck.
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I'm 19 and I've been dating this 24 year old guy for a few weeks now, we had sex last night and he didn't feel a thing. It was just a spur of the moment thing, it was the right time in our relationship, we wanted each other really badly. We have had oral sex before in the past, and he'll feel it when I'm giving blow jobs and hand jobs, he just can't feel actual sex. He's the type of guy that even though he's really nice, he's also very honest and I know that if it had something to do with me he would have told me, he said that when I asked him about it too.
I'm falling for this guy and he's falling for me, yet I'm worried that he might decide that it has something to do with me, like I can't sexually satisfy him enough, and he'll break up with me. I've had one other sexual partner and he's had two others, he's never had this problem with them. He hasn't had sex in two years, so he blames the fact that he's overweight and that the condoms aren't very good (we were using durex's, my ex boyfriend was very big on using trojans). I've also heard that health problems could be the reason why too, I don't know if he has any sexual health problems but he does have possible diabetes and possible sleep apnea. He also has depression and mild schizophrenia, however I haven't really noticed any of these and he's dealt with them when he was with his previous sex partners.
Does anyone have any ideas for what could be the problem? That way I can get some reassurance that it's not my fault. And what we could do to resolve this issue?
You said that blow jobs and hand jobs work for him but not straight sex. He could need a little spice in the bedroom to change things up. Using a more sensitive condom could help out also. There is an over the counter medicine at vitamin world called potent v that he can try to help out. I don't believe that the sleep apnea has anything to do with his performance but some of the drugs he's using could be. Try to be patient if you really love and care for him but talking and making him realize that you care should help him trough it. Hope this helps and good luck.
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Hey, I'm an 18 year old female. I've been dating my boy for about 5 months now. We were friends for about a year or so before we started dating. I always had something for the boy. When we first started dating it was like a dream (Like any other starting of a relationship). We were both so eager to see each other.. and just so in love. It never changed for me until recently.
He's been so.. distant. Not only that, but every time I bring up a problem, it's more of a problem that I did. He just doesn't get it. I know he has work and college and I respect that, but I try to see him as much as I can. Which is usually once or twice a week. And some days he'll make up excuses not to see me. I love the kid, I really do. He's amazing.. just.. not so much recently. He becomes cold, distant.. bitter. and everything seems to push back on me.
I'm a romantic, too. I love to give small gifts, whether they're notes or poetry.. or what ever. I just try so hard to show my feelings and portraying it. Every time I do this.. it becomes a joke. He claims it was just a stage of him being sweet and he's not clingy. I'm so desperate for getting the tenderness I need that I'm crushing over other guys. I'd never cheat. I don't know what I want anymore. All I know is I want to be happy. Yes, people say to use my heart and not my head.. but it's pretty hard when it's in this situation. If anyone, please anyone, can help me.. please try. I can't take this much longer.
There may be something else going on in his life that he doesn't want to tell you that's been making him distracted. Or he possibly wants to end the relationship but doesn't have the guts to do it himself. Either way, you need to sit down and have a serious talk about your feelings, If he can't open up or want to change, it may be time to move on. Hope this helps and good luck.
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I like a guy, and I told him because by facebook I had sent him an extremely stupid and emabarassing wall post. He was really nice about it, and didn't make fun of me at all. Four days after this, he sent me an e-mail telling me he just wants to be friends and that he likes someone else, but he said "right now" after both of these sentences. We haven't talked ever since, we're pretty much pretending the other doesn't exist. And after all these I want us to be more than friends, but I'm too afraid to do anything. What do you suggest?
I'm afraid you have what everyone goes through. You want what you can't have and that makes you want it even more. My advice is to be patient, be his friend (if you can without driving yourself crazy) and see what develops with his current girlfriend. Try your best not to be pushy because this may chase him away for good. Hope this helps a little and good luck.
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Alright, I met my boyfriend when I was 15 and I'm now a Freshman in college, so we've been together for 3 years.
I love him. He's a great guy, he's been there for me. He's my first kiss, my first love.. I lost my virginity to him.
The problem is our relationship feels like it's going stale. We don't really do anything adventurous and we certainly don't have any exciting anymore. I've tried getting him to talk about his lack of sexual desire and he just brushes it off. I've tried getting him to take me to do new things but he's brushed that off as well. I've tried mentioning that perhaps we shouldn't see each other every single day so we can retain some excitement when we do get together,but that hasn't seemed to go anywhere either.
I'm at a loss. I'm so sexually unsastisfied and bored, I've found myself going on internet chatrooms, imagining a guy doing the things he says he would. Now I've found a guy to talk to but he doesn't know my real name or where I live.. it's exciting but I know I shouldn't do it. The problem is since it's on the internet and the chances of him catching me is slim, I wind up doing it anyway.
I don't want to break up with my boyfriend.. I really care about and love him. But what can I do to either spice up our relationship or discipline myself from trying to explore other men?
I'm sure that you do care for your boyfriend a lot but you are no longer in love with him. People do not fantasize about or seek out other men when they're in love. You should be honest with him and end the relationship. If you really want to play out more sexual roles, you should try dating someone a little older and more experienced. They won't laugh or shun you for wanting to try new things and may be able to show you a few new tricks. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask. Hope this helps and good luck.
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18/F
How do I tell my boyfriend what else I want him to do without sounding pushy or making him feel like he's doing something wrong. I love how he pleasures me but I want more concentration on my clit so I can orgasm. The only time it really gets anything is if he goes down on me which doesnt happen a whole lot because its usually somewhere that the space is tight. (He's younger than me and his parents can be kind of strict). Anyways, he does a great job but I need a little more focus there so help please!
Dont't be afraid to tell him different things you like. Surprisingly , guys like to see a woman thats being pleased and turned on. My best suggestion would be to buy a small but powerful vibrator (they have ones like a lipstick tube) and tell him that a girlfriend suggested you try this. Then, when you're having sex, you can break that out and put it on your clit while he is inside you. Make sure he know this is no reflection on his performance but mearly another tool to make you happy. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask. Hope this helps and good luck.
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