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Hey guys,
I haven't asked for advice on here in a while. I guess I thought I was somewhat invincible,I thought I could handle all my problems on my own but now I realize I can't.
I need advice. I'm going through a lot right now.
Ok where to begin.. I turned 18 recently and with that came a whole new set of responsibilities ones I was looking forward to. College, living on my own, opening my own bank account working part time learning to drive. Basically being independent.
But something awful happened the night of my birthday. I had a party with family and friends in my house. Then afterwards we headed out clubbing. My friends drink got spiked and she was voilently sick. I lost my camera that my boyfriend had bought me too and I was just a mess. Im very responsible when I head out so when all this happened I kept beating myself up over how irresponsible I was. Usually Im the one who doesn't let her hair down. Seeing as it was my 18th birthday I felt I deserved to have a good time?but anyway Afterwards I had like a mini melt down. I was completely tripping and hallucinating.I was totally irrational.My family were so worried they brought me to the doctors and it turned out my drink was spiked too. The doctors said I have a gene that reacts badly to drugs. So even if I wanted to which i would NEVER I can't do drugs.
I'm still trying to come to terms with what happened. Me and my friend are really lucky we are here To tell the story. Its just so hard because on top of that I received my exam results,which were fantastic because I worked so hard. But im finding it so hard to be happy about anything. I decided to defer college until next year but I feel so numb.
I feel angry but I have no face to direct my anger towards. This should have been the most exciting time of my life and instead I feel a shadow of myself.
Im happy about my decision to stay home and recover because what happened knocked my confidence massively.
I feel im not good at anything. Im reflecting too much on things also.
I feel like I deserve everything thats happened to me,as some sort of punishment for the mistakes I made in the past. How ridiculous is that?!
I live in Ireland and the exam system is different from the u.s you are awarded points for each grade. The points are out of 600. I got 495. 60 above what I needed for my first college choice. However I didn't get my first choice because I missed out with a requirement in english. The course required a B and I got a C. This devastated me even more on top of everything else. English was always my best subject. I got an A in my trial exams. Anyway you can appeal results over here so I have sent my exam back to be rechecked (our school was very unhappy overall with the way english was graded)
So that was another blow to my confidence even though I did so well in all my other subjects. Better than I expected. I have soo much coming up this year that I should be looking forward to but I feel so down. I'm usually a very bubbly outgoing person. I don't want to end up becoming a reserved shy and reclusive person. How do I get through all this?
How do I stop beating myself up for my mistakes?
I feel like a bad person. I feel this is karma for all the silly things I did when I was younger?
Is it normal to feel this way?
Sorry this is long any advice or insight would be greatly appreciated!
(link)
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First off I have been where you are. for the last year i felt that it was my mistakes that screwed me over and that I deserved everything that is coming to me,. even now i sometimes feel that way but you have to understand my dear that was not your fault at all!
The fact that you are sooo in control of everthing, and anything in your life gives you a feel of balance,. control and sanity.
Because that one little pill or liquid what ever it may have been knocked everything you knew out and put in hallucinations,.
You just need to take a few deep breaths,. relax and look yourself in the mirror and think. This is not at all my fault. Do that 3 times everysingle day. And you will start realizing it.
Spiked drinks can happene to anyone. Maybe try talking to someone about it like a theropist. i tried a few different theropists before i actually found peace.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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So about two and a half weeks ago I was hanging around the football field after a football game with one of my friends (were both cheerleaders, so we had to stay after to put up our mats and stuff). While I was carrying one of the mats to the locker room one of the guys on the football team was also hanging around (even though it was pretty late after the game). I know the guy, but we don't really hang out and stuff and only have a few mutual friends. Anyway, he called me over and I went to go talk to him and right away I knew something was weird. He started hitting on me and touching my arm and asking me if he could give me a ride home and what not. I said no and told him I had to go. But he grabbed me and pulled me into the guys' locker room. I tried to get away, but I was really no match for this kid. He had me pinned against a wall and was half trying to dry hump me/cover my mouth and half trying to get my skirt off, when thank God, my friend Jake found me. Jake plays football and had forgotten his phone in his locker and came back to get them. He shoved the other dude off me and was trying to get him to fight him but the other guy ran off.
Since then, the other dude hasn't admitted that he had physically forced me to do anything. Not much I can do to prove it so I kind of have to leave it at that. But the thing is... ever sicne then I've been feelings this weird attraction to Jake. Even though for years he's been like a brother to me... It's weird. I think it just may be because he rescued me, and I'm having some weird response to that... I really don't want to like him... haha he's a great guy and really hot but he's my friend and I don't want to ruin that and I'm not sure what to do. Any advice? By the way, I'm sixteen, girl. The guys are both seventeen. (link)
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To add to zane's advice. i agree that you need to tell an adult. becdause by not doing anything you not only let him off the hook... But you let him free to try to rape other girls. And they might not be so lucky as you to get away. And that can scar their lives and change them for ever.
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I have been hanging out with this guy for the past few months. He is very friendly and flirty with all of his friends that are girls. One night, he got my number from somebody and started asking me if I like him. I can't take him seriously, but I felt kind of bad for him so I told him kind of. For the next few days, he kept bringing it up. He would stop replying right after I answered the question and tried to make the conversation less awkward. I finally got fed up with it when he asked me if I had a boyfriend, so I told him that I didn't like him. I go back to school the next day to find out that he told my friend about it. She told me that he did the same thing to her and to another one of my friends. The sad thing is that we think he's in a relationship with another girl. Am I wrong to be mad at him for doing this to me and my friends? (link)
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Your completely right you should be mad. He is playing everyone just for the attention. He isn't worth your time because he is obviously playing everyone.
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I'm M/16. I have heard the term, "Quantum creator," multiple times. I have searched the internet for information. Suprisingly, there is very little information about what a quantum creator is, what they do, and how to become one. I find the term "Quantum Creator" to be so cool. If you can tell me about it, that'd be great. (link)
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http://www.quantum-creators.com/
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17/f
This is extremely long, I'm so sorry.
I like this guy, he's one of my good friends. I'll call him David.
Heres the thing, my best guy friend, who I'll call Robert, is best friends with David. So we all hang out on weekends and stuff.
Like a month ago they were trying to guess who I liked. My best friend Robert said he'd tell me who he liked if I told him who I liked. Well eventually he found out that I liked David and a few days later Robert admitted to liking me.
I don't like Robert like that and he knows that but we're cool so it's not a problem or awkward or anything.
So I don't know if David likes me, but we text everyday and hang out alot, he'll offer to give me rides home and all that.
Last month I kinda told him that I liked him. He was texting me asking who I liked and I wouldn't tell him and he said he wanted to guess but he'd feel awkward. I told him he probably already knew. He said, "Does his name start with a D, he's taller than you, and can sometimes be a big meanie?" I said yeah so I kinda assumed he knows. Then we hung out later that day with no awkwardness.
But nothing ever came up after that so I kinda assumed he doesn't like me like that.
He's never had a girlfriend so maybe he just didn't know what to say? That's my hopeful side.
When we all hang out they all poke me and I'll punch them back and he does it so much. He's also started giving me massages. So I'm just confused about how he feels. And he took me out to eat today so I don't know.
I don't want to ask him how he feels because I don't want to hear, "I only like you as a friend." Long story to that and I can't take that yet. Plus it'd be awkward to hang out with him alone again.
Robert was looking through my phone so I took his and was reading some of his messages. He was talking to his friend, telling her about how he felt awkward because he's hanging out with potential couples. He named the two other people that liked each other and then named me and David. He said that if me and David ended up going out that he's gonna feel awkward because his best guy friend and his best girl friend were going out and if the break up ends badly then it's just gonna ruin our group.
Anyway, he was expressing that he didn't want me and David to be together.
I was deciding to just give up on the idea but then I realized what other people think shouldn't matter. Because I'm usually so careful about peoples feelings and I'd rather have them happy than myself. But I was thinking, if there is a chance for me and him, I might want to take it. Bad idea?
But Robert messaged me a couple weeks ago saying, "I have good news for you." I said what and he said, "me and David were hanging out and he asked me if I liked you and I said idk then I turned the question on him and he said idk the same way I did."
My brother is friends with them too so one night a couple days ago he was asking me if I liked David. I said, "What? No, where'd you hear that?" He said, "I was asking who he liked and I pointed to each of the girls at lunch and he said no to each of them but when I pointed to you he said I don't know"
That's why I'm confused. Maybe he does like me or maybe he really just doesn't know how he feels.
Should I ask him or should I just let it be and see if something does happen?
Thank you so much and I'm sorry for how long it was. (link)
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There is always the potential for a bad break up. But there is also the potential for a great relationship. It seems like he might like you but is not sure how to let you know or not sure how to make the first move, Because you said you don't know if you like him to him,. He is probably wondering if he should even try because of the chance that you might not like him. so i would definetly make the first move or at elast give him some signs,. showing that you do really like him.
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what is an inconspicuous way to let the guy i like know how i feel? (if your gonna say to just tell him, please don't.) (link)
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Try giving him a few signs like touching his arm when sonmething is funny, Smiling every single time your eyes meet,. Give him a hug before you leave when your chillin. Just give him some signs that will hint that you have a thing for him.
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What is a cute nickname for a boy that matches tink? (link)
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I call my boyfriends hon, babe, love, uhmm not sure about anything else
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im 15/f
my friend lets call her britney liked this guy lets call him mitchell. she used to like him but she doesnt know i liked him before she did. she now likes this other guy and its a different guy. i like mitchell again and told her but she got annoyed? i also really like mitchell and i want him to know but also dont want him to know because i dont think he likes me. what do i do? (link)
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She's annoyed because of the fact that nothing happened between them,. and that you might have a chance to have what she didn't have. But she has moved on so just give her some time to adjust. although keep in mind she might still have a little feelings for him still.
If you think you might have a chance with this boy then just be straight up with him. He will either say he likes you too,. Or he will let you down easy. If he doesn't then it's not the end of the world.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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I'm sooo excited to ask this question because I haven't asked this question or felt this in a long time. Soooo, I like someone. He's the president of an organization in my university. I belong to the organization but I'm not on the executive board. He always says hi to me, likes my facebook status', and I've caught him starring at me while talking to other people (which may mean he was talking about me). During our meetings, he stares at me the whole time. If I'm around, he's always starring. He points out my accomplishments in our meetings and it's just very cute. I think he really likes me, but he's very shy. And maybe he's afraid of rejection. But, he's adorable. So, I've got the love bug. :). Now what do I do??? I was thinking of asking him to this thing called date dash that my sorority does. You take a date to a theme park for the day. I just don't want to be awkward, you know. So, what's a cute way to do it... or a better way to get closer to him?
xoxo
PS, I'm 20 he's 21, if that helps
(link)
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Honestly that is a very good way to get to know him while being around him. That will give you more of a feel as to how he is feeling,. watch for intereactions and body language. He could be just being nice,. or he could infact actually like you.
so invite him to the date dash,. and see how it goes.
Goodluck!
~Jasmine*
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My Father died when I was 6 years old, and it is now 10 years later and my Mother still hasn't properly grieved for him. She has not had a job since, (my father, financially, left us off very well) and she is constantly "keeping herself busy" with pointless things to do. She has an extreme ammount of stress for no reason at all, because she is CONSTANTLY worrying about everyone she knows.. She also has a gambling addiction, which she is working on at the moment, and a smoking addiction. She has gotten to the point where she stresses so much that it is starting to effect her health (giving her eye twitches and other physical problems). Her nerves are basically shocked and it is extremely hard to try and convince her that ANY of this is real. I don't know what is wrong with her but she definitely has some sort of a mental illness now, and maybe even a physical. The only option left for her is an intervention. I am trying to plan one, but since I am only 17 it is hard to do this all by myself and make it legit enough for her to see what she is doing to herself. If you have ANY, any ideas, on how to start or have this intervention, or know of any homes that she can be taken to "to heal" essentially that would be great. Thanks so much in advance!
Amber (link)
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An intervention is usually consisting of a few to many people, by letting her hear the sides from a few different people like her friends, and your siblings that might get the message through to her,.
You could also talk to a therapist about how your worried that she hasn't fully 'let go'. Maybe she doesn't want to let go,. or she is just unsure how to handle the situation very well. I would talk to her about it and how it's making you feel and how it's being preceived by everyone around.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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I am 18 years old now. ohkay i need help. ive been trying to figure this out for a while. So since i was little i remember humping things, i remember tring to do sexual things to myself and playing "doctor" with other people when i was like 9ish. i was told from my mom that she caught my older cousin kissing me one day, i dont remember this AT ALL. i just remember her never letting me and him alone together ever. Ever since those young years i always get this "guilt" feeling like when i have sex with my boyfriend i have to stop because i get this feeling. but i had that feeling even when i humped things when i was little. and about 3 years ago i fell asleep in my brothers bed and i woke up to him touching my butt so i moved alittle to the side and he started touching my butt again and then after a couple minutes he stopped, i just acted like i was sleeping so idk if he was or not. i just i want this feeling to go away and idk why i get it, but its an occasional feeling. any response is helpful. thank you. (link)
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Maybe try talking to someone about it like your mom. If its a reacurring feeling even when your with your boyfriend then i think there is a issue your subconsious is telling you you need to deal with. as for your brother,. because you moved away and he touched your butt again,. i would say he is doing it on purpose. But i can't be for sure,. I would talk to him about what happened and ask him not to do it again.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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Hey!!!Waz Up??? Crazy Hair Day is coming up at my school and I'm going to cut half my hair off...but i dont know what else to do with my hair....any ideas??? (link)
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Are you a girl or a guy?
Spiked hair would be wikked! orr messy pony tails?
hmm do something that litteraly makes you look like a crazy person. lawl!
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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18 f
im a freshman in college and the first week i hooked up with this one guy. we really hit it off and even though we had sex within the first couple days of meeting he continued to show interest in me by texting me pretty much everyday and hanging out. we would even hang out sober and were really getting to know eachother. we developed this fun flirty friends with benefits kind of relationship. im not the jealous type and ive told him not too worry about hooking up with other girls. hes a really sweet guy who seemed more into me than i was into him to be honest. he always wanted me to sleep over and watch movies with him and was always telling me that i was gorgeous and really chill and things like that. thats why i was suprised when he stopped texting me so much. now im not the type of girl to chase guys so i havnt been texting him either. but is it wrong of me to assume that hes always going to be the one to text me first? i mean i dont want a serious relationship and neither does he but i still just like hanging out with him and honestly hooking up with him. i dont want to seem clingy by texting him because its college and i know how guys are, but i dont want this fling to die out either. i mean it has only been a week since we last hung out and weve talked once since.
i guess what i want to know is do you think im just overreacting? or do you think hes moved on and lost interest in me? and if so, should i make a move to show him im into him or should i just let it go?
thanks in advance!!
(link)
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First of all,. he may have stopped texting you because of the fact its ALWAYS him texting first. A friendship goes both ways where you text first also. I would start texting him more to let him know that the interest is mutual not just one sided. even if it is just for FWB it can definetly turn into something alot more someday.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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I am a virgin and i have seen so much porn in high school..., that it has been saved in my permanent memory, i have avoided watching porn for more than a year, i haven't even seen a naked pic. I have been avoiding to watch tv as it ultimately makes me to watch porn...
After all these...
Each and every girl (any female)that i see, i imagine myself having sex with her...
I reached the limit's when the same started to occur with my sister and even my mom,or even the most unattractive woman on earth of no matter what age...
I would be pleased to hav even the slightest of supports...
And don't think your advice would be a waste,if its upto the mark it will be implemented in mine, as well as lifes of several people of ma kind... Thanking in advance... Waitin for your response (link)
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Okay,. So thinking about sex, watching porn is completely normal..
Maybe your just urgeing a bit to much because of the fact that your A virgin,..
But the fact that your thinking that way about your mom and your sister... Is a very bad sign..
Either your hormones are out of balance or you might have a phycological problem,.
It would be a very good idea to talk to someone like a theropist about these things,. just so something doesn't happen to your family that you would majorly regret.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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iargue withmy friend all the time i try to do nice thing for her but we always end up in afight.i cant put up with this much longer-what can i do? (link)
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Talk to her about how you are feeling and how it is affecting you,. Explain your side and then ask to hear hers how she feels about the situation and all that. Maybe it would be best for you two to part ways for a while.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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Hi
Okay so my ex and I have reopened the lines of communication and text each other every evening. (he dumped me btw)
Yesterday though he asked me whether I was good at cooking anything so I told him and he was intruiged
Then he said he liked to bake and said if I ever needed anything baking at all to let him know.
What does he want? :/ (link)
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I think he was just curious... I don't see any underlinning intentions or anything like that so i would just brush it aside and now worry about it.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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I am afraid to tell my mom the truth about me not doing my home work I am scared. Help!!! (link)
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First of.. Why aren't you doing it?
Is it that you are having trouble?
Is it that you are confused about how to do it?
Or is it the fact that your just not doing it?
If thats the case... Start doing it.. sure sure hw is a pain in the ass. And it takes a while.. But would you really wanna be 27 and going back for classes because you simply 'didn't do your homework'...
As an adult im telling you to be smart about your homework. it's work for a reason. so you can learn and get your GED Highschool Diploma) which is a very important thing. With out it you can get a sommewhat okay job., But with it,. It opens sooooo many doors!
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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Alrighty so I am very very active with sports & running & anything having to do with fitness. I kind of obsess over my weight. Does running a lotttttt & drinking a lot of water cause you to gain a pound or 2? I'm just curious because I just started running a lot about 2 or 3 weeks ago & I gained like 2 pounds.. I'm also on my period so idk if thathas anything to do with it. Help would be appreciated :) (link)
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Drinking water is important for your good health, but it is possible to drink too much water when you drink a huge amount of water in a very short time. This condition is called hyponatremia and can be very dangerous.
Here's a site talking aboyt hyponatremia:
It also talks about athlete's and their training so that would be good to read.
http://www.ultracycling.com/nutrition/drinking_too_much.html
But also! during the period time your body will retain more liquids than usual.. which might make u feel bloated.. so you might gain a few pounds of water weight?
Hope this Helps:)
~Jasmine*
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Does drinking too much water cause you to gain weight? Im 5"4 & I'm usually between 104-106 lbs & I drink like 70 ounces of water a day because I'm currently in preseason for a sport. My weight also fluctuates a lot & I don't know why (link)
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Drinking water is important for your good health, but it is possible to drink too much water when you drink a huge amount of water in a very short time. This condition is called hyponatremia and can be very dangerous.
Here's a site talking aboyt hyponatremia:
http://www.ultracycling.com/nutrition/drinking_too_much.html
Hope this Helps:)
~Jasmine*
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My sister is turning 24 next week and I want to get her something really special, because she's the older one and she's always buying me whatever I want and I want to give back to her. She's totally into reading and she has like the awesomest collection of books ever, LOVES writing, and she also sings. I'm telling you this so that you can have some idea what kind of a person she is. I have some money saved up but not too much :( I'm 14 btw, so suggest something that I can actually get. Thanks in advance (link)
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What about a gift certificate to coles book store,. or which ever book store is around you. That way she can add to her books and it won't be a book she might not like,.
If she loves writing maybe a fancy notebook?
I have one for my poetry it's blue and it is hardcovered,. i believe i got it from zellers you could try walmart as well. or umm wallgreens i think it's called:P if you live in us.
Hope this helps:)
~Jasmine*
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