about

My name's Kendal and i'm 17. I've been through quite alot of stuff, from heart breaks, to messed up parents with drug addictions & not being together, to fights with just about anyone about anything. I'm the youngest of 7 children, 4 brothers & now two sisters. In school I use to be the kind of girl who thought they were better then everyone else, and was the popular bitch who played varsity basketball & softball as a freshman. Alot has changed. After my older sister died things sort of started coming into perspective. And i just wanna help ppl out now. If you need anything about anything. I'm here to talk, help, listen, whatever. I dont judge, and i usually can understand where the ppl are coming from. My lifes had alot of ups and downs and i really just wanna help out. I wish i would of known about this site a few years ago! Currently i have a boyfriend, Chad. And i usually hang out w/ him and my friends after school and on the weekends. I'm super social, and i think easy to talk to. So ask me anything! Btw the user name's from the song, from the tv show; 8th and ocean. If anyone was wondering. ha.
MUCH LOVE!

advice

I miss my boyfriend i havent seen him in a while, is there any way i can contact him if he doesnt have like a cell phone?
Thanks in advance!

If you know some of his good friends, then i would call them. Or call his house. i dont see the problem there. :]

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what are some good dancing songs?

For me i like :
-Supergirl, hilary duff
-The future freaks me out, motion city soundtrack
-like a virgin, madonna
-Party like a rockstar, jt experience
-TNT, acdc
-SOS, rihanna
-Hips dont lie, shakira
-Girls just wanna have fun, (sorry i dont know who thats by)

Sorry if thats not what you like, it all depends. hopefully that helped tho! :]

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hi, is it normal to feel suicidal if you family are arguing, not just regular rows, but like, heavy, hitting, swearing, etc....? this is getting to be real bad between my sister and mom. and i cant do anything. i hate it! it starts over something small, and turns huge. my sister usually starts it, but my mom doesnt help either. so is it normal for me to feel suicidal, and usually thinking about it?

If it has nothing to do w/ you, there is nothing you can really do. But def. dont feel like you wanna die. Thats horrible. Mothers & daughters fight all the time, and the only way i could think of you preventing it would be talking to your sister or your mom when they arent fighting, on a completely different day. And just saying that it really bothers you when you do fight, and to try not to ask much. Hopefully they'll understand that it effects you and they'll try and not be so physical, or just not do it as much. Also you could help out as much as possible. like if their fighting about someone doing something, you could just try and do it. But its def. no reason to want to die, because their fighting. it has nothing to do w/ you, and there isnt alot you could do.
Sorry, hope that helps! :] Good Luck!

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Hello, this july will be me and boyfriends 6th month being together. I wanted to do something special for him for this day, but i cant really think of anything creative, so i was wondering if any of you can think of stuff. The 6th anniversary will also be on my birthday, so there's something you may think of. I am going to turn 15 and he's 16, just to help ya out a bit.

Thanks a bunch,
-Racquel

Thats super cute first of all that you're going to have your 6th month anniversary. I've never been to creative w/ things like that for my boyfriend. But i could tell you some of the things that my friends have done.
One of my friends got the number of days they've been dating of different colored paperclips and hooked them all together, and put them in a small box, he pulled them out of the box and on the bottom of the box it said "__ (so many) days since i've been loving you" - kind of corny but cute. And then made him some cookies, and they had a picnice sort of thing at the beach.
But if you wanna do something more like fancy. You could take him to get his favorite food and then get him 6 of something he likes like small little footballs, or something else just as a cute little gift. I really dont think it has to be that big or anything as long as its cute and meaningful.
Or one of my friends, bought him a nice watch & a calender & a piece of paper said, so you can tell when our next year together has been or for you our next 6 months has been.
One of my friends has just wrote a note before saying how much she loved the pass months w/ him. and things like that. or you could just use what i have said and done something else like that. Sorry if that wasnt that helpful! Those are just some ideas. Good Luck. And tell me how it goes, or what you end up doing! :]

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my name is Rachel and iam 17 years old and my mom and I have never really been close,but it seems like we are drifting even further apart than we use to be like yesterday we were fighting about how to cut my hair even though I was paying for it my mom told me I had to get it trimmed becouse I couldn't handle styling it,but I was paying for it so I should have been able to get it like how I wanted so I got it trimmed just becouse she wanted me to to keep from starting an argument.Then like when I broke up with my boyfriend jesse she asked me how could I break that poor boys heart like she was taking his side of the situation.The other day it got so bad that I ranaway to my aunt's house and now my mom dosn't truest me anymore what should I do?
please help me!

Me & my mom never had a good relationship, and i always wish we would of. So you should def. try and be close to her now.
If she doesnt trust you, you have to get that back. By doing exactly what you say you will, and being responsible, helping out around the house shows that. She'll know that your trying to help out, and trying to show her that you can be responsible and she'll like that.
Also just to be closer to her, just do things w/ you and her. Try going out to like a breakfast place in the morning and talking and really tell her things going on in her life, most moms like to be close to their kids.
That or just sit down and watch a movie w/ her and you two can chow down on popcorn or such food. Just do things w/ her, one on one. You'll become closer to her. If you have one on one things you do w/ her like 3 or 4 times throughout the month. And tell her important things in your life. You'll quickly become closer, if you talk about things. My friend Tiffany and her mom have the BEST RELATIONSHIP and even in 8th grade Tiffany's mom knew the firs time she had drank, and done things w/ guys. i'm not saying you have to be that close, but its something you'll def. always want. :] hopefully that helps!

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My boyfriends birthday is very far away [october]
but I keep TRYING to think of stuff to get him but i dont know what im thinking of concert tickets but i dont know..

he gave me a very expensive camera and i dont want to give him a petty gift

HELP!

Concert tickets actually seems like a good idea, they arent cheap & then you both could really enjoy his birthday too. But yeah boys are VERY hard to buy for. Camera's are a really nice gift, and i could see how you dont wanna give him something equally as nice. If you dont like the conert idea anymore, i think buying him a good bottle of clone, and then something else like a watch or something would be nice. But if hes not that kind of guy then i would stick w/ the concert. But you do have some time. So keep thinking. And i'll let you know if i have any other ideas too :] Good Luck!

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ok....so me and my ex just started "dateing" not going out..dateing..I dont really like this idea cause it means we could make out and he can makeout with another girl and I just have to deal..we say we love eachother..but if tats true why wont he ask me out??

help!!!!!

Me & a boy went through something similar to this a while back, i was the one however that wouldnt go out w/ him if he asked. I didnt want the commitment. That might be the same with this boy, some people are just scared of commiting completely to the person, they feel that they cant talk to other girls and that they have to be really serious w/ you, and do things for you & treat you better. Its just stressful for them, and this way you guys can have the same relationship just without the entire boyfriend girlfriend deal. If i was you tho, i would definitely put boundaries. Say what you can and cant do w/ other people. This way its not just he does crap with you, and then with another girl. And you'll understand if it does happen.
Hopefully that helps :]

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16/f

I have horrible cramps. They are so bad I can't stand up straight and I'm almost in tears. How can I lessen the pain? I tried ibuprofen but it's not helping and a heating pad doesn't work either.

Firstly, i'm sorry that you have cramps. I know the pain your in, and its horrible.
For me motrin ALWAYS works best. That and lots of water. Plus if you're wearing a tampon, don't. Just wear a pad. Also, try being active. Even if it is hard to walk, and hurts more. Try and just slowly walk and do things, this also helps them go away quicker.
Hopefully that helps!

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how long is a guys penis when he's 15?

Well, every guy varies. It especially matters how far they are through puberty. Average guys when their that age though are about 6inches. Could be bigger tho depending on if their done w/ puberty, or if their just a bigger guy (by bigger i mean taller) and things like that. If their a smaller boy, their might be smaller. But yeah about 6inches is an average around that age. Hopefully that helps ♥

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Well, whenever me and my two best friends hang out it's all good and we're all happy and talkative with eachother. But lately, this one girl has started to come in and talk to us and whenever she does, I tend to get the left-out feeling. I'll talk but my two other friends'll be like,"Wait, what did you say?" and they sort of pay more attention to her and walk with her more. So basically, I get the boot. But like I said, whenever she's NOT there we're all completely fine and everything.


I just don't know how to handle her whenever she's there.


It's getting to the point that whenever they want her to hang out with all of us I have to make up a lie of some sort so she wouldn't be able to come along.


Help?

Ah. Thats a hard one. if i was you i think i would just really try to include yourself more. or like sort of invite another person that your good friends w/ to come along when you guys all hang out, that way if you do start feeling left out you'll have your other friend to sort of lean on and talk to. And i dont know. Maybe if you start bringing up old memories w/ those two friends of yours, they'll start having alot to talk to you about. And sort of remember the old times that you guys have had & then you guys can talk about that. I'm not saying to leave the other girl out, but that way your somewhat included more. I'm sorry if that doesnt help alot. Good Luck tho :]

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i have really big hips.my hips make me look a lot bigger than i actually am.is there any way to minimize the size of my hips?

also, i have big legs.is there any way to minimize the size of my legs too?thanks

Go here; http://www.weightlossforall.com/exercises-waist-small.htm
& it should tell you different things you can do for your hips.

For your legs;
http://www.annecollins.com/dieting/reduce-fat-thighs.htm
Go there.

Hopefully that helps :]

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i like this boy. hes sooo cute and nice and just plain out perfect for me. we get along really well and we talk online like everyday. i like him so much. but i dont think he is interested. i think he just wants to be friends and i cant stand it. i flirt with him as much as i can without going overboard. i always invite him to hang out to, he always says maybe but then we never do. i dont know what to do. when i asked him if he liked anybody, he said "eh idk. kinda..but not really" ahhh what can i do?

Ask another friend to talk to him for you, not asking if he likes you in particular cause that would make if obvious, but asking him who he likes. He could not wanna tell you b/c it is you. And then afterwards ask him to hang out w/ you, that same friend & a group of other kids so it isnt awkward. Make sure you talk to him while you guys are all hanging out, but not to clingy b/c that kind of turns of guys. But continue to talk to him online, maybe not everyday. You sort of have to play hard to get. So make him im you every now and then. And when you hang out, talk to other guys then just him.. but dont "flirt" with the other guys, which could be tricky. But def. keep me updated! And tell me how things work out :] Good Luck.

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My 2 best friends [who arent even that good of friends with each other] went out last night with a few guys and this girl who are considered cool. My friend invited me to go, but I didnt want to because i wasnt exactly invited by the others. So my best friend went and asked my other friend, and they went and had a BLAST. they then had a sleepover afterwards and couldnt stop repeating how FUN it was. It got me pretty pissed, and they left a message on my fone saying that they didnt think we could be friends anymore because we get in to many fights? Im not sure if they were kidding but I dont know what to do. My friend is really not that social, but over AIM last nite she basically told me that she was sooo cool becuase she is friends with them and im not. what do i do. i need advice.

They seem REALLY mean first off. And if I was you I would quickly make new friends. And kind of ignore those two. I def. wouldnt start fighting w/ them and i wouldnt make it seem like you didnt want to me friends w/ them anymore, because by the way they seem they'd prob just make a huge deal out of nothing & turn it in to some un-needed drama. But make new friends. I dont know what grade your in, but coolness doesnt last very long in school for the most part. Dont let them know that they got to you tho, thats what they wanted when they left that mean message on your phone. But yeah your in a hard situation, you obviously dont wanna start anything but you dont wanna just take it. BUT WHATEVER YOU DO, once you get other friends.. and when they wanna be friends w/ you again, dont go back. Their not worth it, and they dont seem like the kind of friends that would stay by your side and be there for you. Well good luck :]

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well im 13 years old and i dont get that much money from my parents cause were not that rich! however i really wanna buy an e-quitar and i need about uuhh 60 more dollars so does any1 have a good idea how to make money?? like i said im only 13 but please help me! im so desperate with quitars :-D i'll rate 5's for any good advice!

If i was you, i would babysit. If you have any neighbors w/ young kids that would be perfect. Just kind of mention to them that you could babysit whenever they needed you to, and then hopefully the next time they needed one they would call you. Make sure you tell a few neighbors tho, so you dont just have to wait for one to be busy. Also I would collect cans, depending on where you live. I know that in certain states if you return your cans & bottles to gocery stores they give you 10 cents for each can.. which might not seem like alot, but adds up quick. Also, me and my friend when we were about your age would mow ppls grasses.. again depending on where you live if you need to yet. But usually ppl will pay good.. Hopefully that helps you some what. And good luck getting some money. :]

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Hi! im a girl and i'm 17 ..well my sitiation its that my bf and i had a big fight and we broke up.. I LOVE HIM ..but he seems he he doesnt care.. y talked to him and he said we are just friends.. sohuld I quit talking to Him?..and i also dont want go out becauase im sad..i quit eating asnd all that stuff... what can i doo!?

Well first, you need to start eatting again. That's not good for your body at all, and if you go to long w/out eatting the next time you eat something your bodies just gunna hold on to it. And its really not good at all.

And about the guy - well i would def. still keep talking to him. Even as friends for now, and if you guys are meant to be together & that was just a fight. Then you'll both realize it sooner or later & get back together. And if not, its good to be friends w/ someone you use to be w/, they tend to understand you better. Well hopefully that helps. :] much love

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SORRY THIS IS SOO LONG!
but i just need advice..


how do i get a boys attention? oookay yeah this might sound selfish or conceited or whatever you wanna call it but i love gettin attention from boys..i mean who doesnt =p but i have this one boy in mind. he goes to a different school than me but i hear that he cant get over his ex girlfriend...and they are always talking. but my cousin actually talks to him sometimes..just never hangouts with him. he plays baseball..so im thinkin i should go to one of his games with my cuzin ...but the only thing im worried about are the girls that go there. because if they see me they will be like whose that? why is she here? she doesnt even go here? and all that shit. i know this one girl i dont like will be there...and that other girl i was talking about that this boy cant get over. i wanna like go to the baseball game and have him notice me..like thinkin wow whos that cute girl? havent seen here before....wish i could talk to her...like i said im not a bitch or anything or conceited..but how do you think i could get his attention? like i bet after the game all those girls i dont like will go up and talk to all the guys...and me and my cousin will probly just go home!! i mean i wonder if he has seen me before? because ive seen him many times..sometimes at a distant tho....and at his hockey game one time my cuzin was like OH MY GOSH THERE HE IS!! and i guess he walked by?? and i was like huh where i didnt see him!!? and shes like are you kidding me..he was staring like right at you...but the only prob. is my cousin always says stuff like that around guys i think are hott..and them girls i was talkin about earlier were RIGHT behind me so i bet he was lookin at them (since they are very pretty). i dont see myself as pretty..or attractive so i dont think that helps and i for sure dont have the confidence to march right up there and talk to him. i dont have any cute clothes....i cant just all of a sudden go on a shopping spree you know..i never know how to where my hair...curling it never works only straightening it does. i am an unperfect girl
i just want this one guys attention..or even talk to him ..anything!!!
so if anyone could please help me with my situation i will for sure rate you 5!!
thanks for everything guys
♥

GOOOD IDEA, GO TO THE GAME! And if the other girls there start giving you dirty looks, brush it off.. smile at them at first and be friendly, but if their bitches just ignore them completely. You came to see the guy, not start drama. Next-make sure you stay till the end and talk to the guy w/ your cousin, just a cute Hi and introducing yourself sort of talk will at least make him know who you are. Also for what you look like, go ahead and straighten your hair, if thats what looks best. But a clip in it on one side maybe, depending on how you part your hair. And for your clothes. Nothing crazy, but nothing like a sweatshirt and shorts. Just a cute pair of jeans, flip flops that match the shirt your wearing, and a cute t-shirt would be cute. And if you dont like your clothes, borrow from your cousin, or another friend. But i'm sure after he talks to you, you'll be fine! Have fun, tell me how it goes! and Good luck !! Much love ♥

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how much alcohol is considered binge drinking?

Go here - http://www2.potsdam.edu/hansondj/BingeDrinking.html
and it will tell you all about binge drinking.

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hi im 13 and my boyfriend is 16 yes i know thats an age gap. well i understand that he likes drinkin and ya i do to sadly. but i dont really do it as much anymore. and he told me staright up he was gonna stop. then he went out and did it again and i asked him why he said that when he didnt mean to and he said because he just wanted to. well sometimes i feel like he would rather be drinking and other stuff then rather being with me like beer is more important. how can i stop myself from feeling this way.
p.s he ditches me to go do that stuff

It's def. normal to feel that way. And at 16 the boy really just wants to have fun i bet. I dont know how close you are, but you should tell him that. Tell him that it feels like that, and that since your not really into that kind of stuff anymore its awkward. Go to those kind of things w/ him, and just dont drink. Keep him busy, and he prob. wont either. And if he does tell him straight up that its annoying how he would ditch you for beer, and that maybe this isnt gunna work out. 13 & 16 is a big gap at age. And i hate to say it but i dont know if you'll last that long. I mean its def fun, but if thats how he is, i personally think you could do better.

"If they're not there for you, then they're not worthy of you either"
Well hopefully that helps. Good Luck! :] Much love

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I'm dying my hair tomorrow, (permanent)blonde and I don't know if I should wash my hair tonight when I'm gonna shower/bath. I heard its better for the dye to sink/stay in oily hair then fresh dry. Is that true? I haven't washed it for 3 days. Thanks in advance. :-)

I've never heard of doing that. BUT i wouldnt wash it. If you've heard it better, it probably is. And if its not just ask your hair dresser before hand. If they say no, they'll wash it for you there. And if so, then you are ready to go. :] Well good luck!

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ok so i am 15 and i have this friend and me and her are great friends but she considers me as a brother and not a boyfriend....i have told her s everal times that i feel like we can be more...and she doesnt want to ruin anything even though i know i would never let anything come between us EVER...she currently has a boyfriend of like 3 months but i kno he doesnt care for her because when ever she wants to see him he makes up an excuse not to and when i want to hang out with her she does the same thing to me...it just doesnt make sense and i dont know what to do...what should i do? i was considering sending her the link to the song For You I Will by Teddy Geiger..is that a good choice?

First of all i think that is the cutest thing ever. How much you like, would never let anything come between you guys, and how you would wanna send that song. BUT, she has a boyfriend. And until she realizes that your the better man, and that your into her more, your gunna have to let her me. Thats the one reason that song might now be the best idea. it might scare her a little bit, and think that you're like in love w/ her, what could be intimidating to her. Let her know that you like her in other ways. Just always be there for her, and call her and things like that. You could even kindly say that you think her current boyfriend is just making excuses. And even when he does make excuses be the guy thats willing to hang out w/ her anyway. You seem like you really like this girl, and she seems pretty lucky & blessed. But if after you tell her these things she still thinks of you as a brother, be that brother. You dont wanna lose the current friendship that you have. :] Hope that helps. Much love

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