Sweet_LiL_Angel's advice column

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Q: I dont know what to do. Im only 14 and ive been in a relationship with this boy for a year, on and off now, and he's been talking about us having a child. Ive been really thinking about this and I really feel like Im ready for something like this. I know its not exactly a walk in the park bringing up a child and that it isnt something i can just forget about if i get fed up of the responsibilities. I do want to have a child with him now but honestly im not sure if I should. I saw what you said to some girls question and just thought youd be able to help. Please reply, Im not sure who else to ask.
Thanks:) x

I had a baby at 15 not by mistake I wanted a child so I did it. I do wish now I would of waited. I love my son with all my heart who is now 4. He doesnt get to see his dad. His dad doesnt want anything to do with him and If you have been in an on and off relationship your best bet is not to have one with him. What about college. I wanted to be a lawyer and I am good at it. But I dont have the time with kids. And the cost diapers, wipes, formula, clothes, accesories, laudry soap your best bet is to go to college, get a good job meet a great man get married then have a baby do it right and make a career for your self. once you have a baby you dont want to be at mcdonalds

Q: Well i am a virgen and My boy friend is one too and he always talks about how he wants to lose it well I said soon and he said how soon and i said whenever (Dumb answer) And he wants to do it in about 4 days Help!!Idont no what to do So plz leave a comment telling me what i should do !!

Asking a question on here shows you arent ready. I dont know how old you are. Having sex now will ruin you. Youll want it more and more. You may end up pregnant. When you do find that man you want to marry you'll regret not lossing it with him.

Q: If my sisters grandkids doing wrong is it okay for my other sister to get after them.

Maybe if your daughter took at it in a different way such as hey why dont you guys come play with me or come do something else. Or say hey what if grandma broke one of your toys I bet you wouldnt like that? A distraction is better than being loud about it. I know your daughter is doing a good thing and things its the best but I can also see where your sister is coming from its hard to watch someone else yell at your grandkids.

Q: why does my boyfriend of 1 and half years always calls me,''dear''? he just rarely calls me my name probably because he's older than me. he's 45 and i'm 31. or is it just a terms of endearment? thank you guys.

When your boyfriend calls you by name it doesnt really mean anything. when he says hey dear what would you like for supper hes saying your his and only his.

Q: i need sum advice i have a boyfriend of 7months and just recently in these past two months he has expressed huge ammonts of anger towards me. i dont know what is causing him to be this way and he tells me he dosnt know why he does it either.
examples of these things – he starts in a joke that i am cheating and from there he gets worse into it and starts making statements that i am screwing around at me job or if i go somewhere without him that i have been with another guy. he constatly tells me i am being “bitchy” and has that i have a atitutted and starts going off on me about how i am acting when i could just be sitting and not saying a word. during those moments i try so hard not to say anything to him. usually i end up in tears and i am made to answer him otherwise he keeps screaming at me.
ever time i ask him why he says those things to me he tells me he dosent know.
i dont know what to do other then to keep my mouth shut towards him. he tells me to leave him and tells me to find sumone else. i dont know why he says that to me as well. if i agree with him he gets upset and asks me if i am leaving him and why.
no matter how many times i have asked him to stop he goes on about either how its all his fault like usually or he tells me that i have changed and its all me. im confused and lost on this matter.. we have very few good days any more.. he has apoligized to me after i have broken down and cried cause i cant handle what hes saying to me. its like a light switch one minute were just fine the the next hes going off at me then hes just fine again and wants me to get close then he gets mad at me that i am still upset about what had just happened. like he expects me to just brush it off. he has told me he would stop but goes right back to doing it again. he tells me he loves me but also tells me that i need to start showing him that i love him. i honestly feel that he is the one that needs to show me he loves me cause i dont feel like he does.

(i am also 27 and a mother of 3 kids)

I think its time for a speration. Honestly if he is treating you this way how is he treating them babies. If he is changing that quickly he can easily get so angry and he hits you or one of the kids. Reasons why he could be this way is he is talking to another woman that causes it. or is wanting outbut doesnt want to do it stress deprssion drugs lack of sexual inter course thers alot of things.

Q: Im 21 and I have not gotten a period yet and im also having sex, what can I do to make me get my frist period help please........

You need to go see a OBGYN or even just your family doctor I no your looking for better advice than this but your doctor is going to have to run tests we cant do that im sorry and good luck.

Q: What birth control pills do you use.

I use the depo shot and I love it. My only flaw about it is I get sharp pains in my stucmoch alot I was told in most people that stops after 6 months if you even have it. I choose to not stop my medicine even though i have the pain because i have no period havent got pregnant. and mostly i have no period. and i only get the shot every 3 months.

Q: Hai iam a indian girl, 23 year old. I love a guy. He nd his loves me too. But my family hates his family bcoz his mother stays with her second husband. My family thinks he is also a worst guy like his mother, but he is a gem. I unable to tell my parents about my relationship nd his goodness. I want to marry that guy with my family permission. Hey guys pls give me suggestions about my problem quickly.

If you are close to your family like I wish I was with mine. Your families permission is a big ordeal. First off you need to spend more time with each others family, I dont know if you being Indian changes the way you do stuff than my family but With my husband once sometimes more a week wed play cards and wed cook dinner for his family have lots of bbqs and we spent time with my dad which is my only family where I live. my husband talks to my brothers and my mother over the phone and computer.

Q: I am in my 20s and have always had problems with anxiety, depression,
low self-esteem and eating disorders. I feel like I experienced sexual
abuse at such an early age that I have no memory of it. Sometimes I wonder
though if I'm just trying to find one specific reason for all of my issues
and sexual abuse seems to make sense but maybe I'm just crazy.

Here is a list of factors about myself that are concerning to me...

-bed-wetting until about 10 years old

-I was an only child and was very distant and quiet

-earliest memories of masturbating to sexual fantasies around 3 or 4

-I would frequently get caught masturbating by family members as a child
and was subsequently scolded and/or whipped

-I have memories of acting out graphic sexual fantasies with a friend around age 7

-I have a memory of being caught masturbating during nap-time at preschool at age 4

-I have memories of sexual fantasies played out by familiar cartoon characters

-compulsive binge-eating began in early childhood around age 4

-hair-pulling/trichotilomania began around age 7

-frequent vaginal yeast infections in early childhood

-earliest memories of suicidal ideation around age 7

-When I first started have sex at age 15 I experienced a great deal of vaginal pain
which continued for years until I became more comfortable with sex and my long-term
boyfriend which leads me to believe it was probably psychogenic

Even if I was sexually abused but don't remember it, should I even bother trying to remember or delve into this further? Would this make everything worse or be the key to unlocking the solution to my problems and allow me to move forward? And if it happened and I never do remember, am I doomed to suffer PTSD-like symptoms forever or can you treat those symptoms without addressing the possible root cause?

I think it is worth looking into. I lost my virginity by being raped and was raped twice after that and was in an abusive relationship as well my ways of dealing was crazy sex with my husband doesnt like rough sex and i would get terrible night mares and night sweats. Id wake up screaming and crying and I still do. I have post dramtic stress. after I have a child (ive had 2) it gets so much worse because I get really bad post partum depression once i take medicine for the post partum depression and its not so often the bad dreams I dont see a theripist any more because my oldest child sees 3 of them and working full time I just dont have enough time during the week but I think it would be very helpful to you. remember this though its hard to find a theripist you are comfortable with it took me 3 before I found one i really like and now shes one of my sons. so dont settle and get fustrated.

Q: I'm Almost 5 months pregnant and I'm 15, me and the baby's father want the baby it's just my parents don't? They know and want it gone cause their ashamed... I want the baby so bad, just like the father does and were very responsible and he Wanta to take care of us both and support of everyday possible physically and emotionally!(: I'm from Texas. If that helps and I'm Wondering Can I get An abortion? Can they force me too? Anyway me and my boyfriend (the father) can we do anything? any advice anyone? Anything will help thank you...

They can not force you to have an abortion but before you do have this baby you really need to start thinking money wise school etc. I had a baby at 15 and raised mine. As soon as I had my son the father left. Now he pays 75 dollars in child support and never gets to see him. He doesnt even pay 75 my last payment was 37. So if your childs dad doesnt stay with you and you get the same as me thats enough to buy two packs of diapers or one can of formula. A new born baby spits up alot and you go threw a ton of laundry detergent are you going to stay in school and graduate because even with just a high school diploma its about impossible to get a job a good one at that. Sleeping you minds well forget it. You get hardly any sleep. All the supplies you need for a baby bed, clothing, diapers formula, etc. Think first because once you have that baby there is no turning back there are other options suck and adoption. I dont believe in abortion i think its cruel. But thats between you and your famiy and you are 15 you really need to find away to get your families support.

Q:

Some people that I think work for the city came by my house and put "no parking" signs on the curbs of my house. They didn't put any of these signs in my neighbors yard, why would they just put these signs in my yard. We cant park on the curb of the street by our house, but my neighbors can park on their side of the street. The signs say " no parking anytime". None of my neighbors have these "no parking" signs on their curbs. Why do I have it on mine?

you can call the police and find out. there may not supose to be any parking any where on your street is your house in the middle of the street? Id just call and be like I was curious why these signs were put up and but infront of any ones elses houses.

Q: I feel like nobody's listening. No one cares about my life. Almost like God wants me to suffer. I just don't want to think about life. I live across the street from a bridge. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I threw myself off the bridge. Why do I have to be tortured?

It sounds like you are a teenager but you really need some more information to try and help you with our advice. Life is tough. I am 20. I am married with 3 kids. 2 which are mine. I work at a McDonalds that I hate my husband is unemployed and wont talk to me about anything because he says it leads to fighting, I havent yet started college which id like to. We live with my father. My husband and I plus my two kids sleep in the same bedroom. I can go on and on but my life sucks everyones does you just have to find things that make you happy. I work hard but while I work hard im looking for a job that will make me happy. I drop the friends that cause me drama and keep the ones that really seem to care or at least there to talk to you. You have to make your life better if no one is listening to you make friends that will talk to a theripist its their jobs to listen to you and give you advice. Good Luck.

Q: What is the cause of stomach cramps/aches in a 11 year old girl?

Probaby starting her period. It could take weeks or even a month or two before it comes but if that is what it is, it wont be long. It could also be appendix where at on your stumoch are you having cramps? if its the lower right side, at the time of this cramp lay on your back push on the lower right side and let up if it hurts worse the doctors say its your appnendix. Good Luck.

Q: Okay so my boyfriend and I just had a baby 8 weeks ago. We started having sex the 3 week after. I bled the fourth week for 4 days then it stopped. We had sex without a condom idk how many times but he never came inside me. I know about precum but i want to know what are the chances that i am pregnant again? We're buying a test and taking it tomorrow but its killing me to not know at the moment. Someone please give me some idea of whether i should be worried or not :( i feel nauseous, dizzy, depressed, etc. And idk if its from pregnancy or postpartum or just stress from the entire situation. HELP!

We can't tell on here. I am not trying to be mean but you could be either but being pregnant right now isnt good for your body you arent giving it a chance to heal. It just went threw a big event having a child. But if you are congrats. You cant take a test but it may be to soon to tell. you have a lot of emotions taking care of a new born child, thoughts of having another one, id be depressed to.

Q: How can I stop myself from eating so much? I dont have time to go to the gym. How I can I stop eating? food is so good.

Well staying busy is a good way to not eat and if you have to eat an apple or some grapes to snake on they are good to. aviod fast food resturants. you will never be able to stop if you arent really want to do this put your mind to it cut everything sweet out , salt, caffine. My aunt found out her diabetes was getting much worse. she got on a diet prescribed by her doctor and lost a ton of weight we was scared she was going to die. she sticks to this diet she doesnt ever eat anything different cherrios bananas chicken cabbage stuff like that.

Q: I think my friend is anorexic. She wasn't really that fat in the first place but she's lost a lot of weight. Don't get me wrong i'm happy for her but also worried too. She also never ate lunch at school which was really weird because everyone eats lunch! She even stayed after school everyday from 3:30-5:00. I don't want to hurt her feelings but I'm worried about her. What should I say or do?

I would talk to her about it. Be like I dont want to hurt your feelings I am just looking out for you because you are my friend. Are you anorexic. But just because she doesn't eat lunch doesnt mean shes aneroxic. I work monday - friday I eat oatmeal for breakfast and I dont eat again until supper time. Maybe an apple for lunch if im really hungry but usually nothing.

Q: if i had sex with out no condoms 2 days before my period and my period was 5 days late is thier a chance i can be pregent .?

Yes you could become pregnant no matter when you have sex you can get pregnant while you are on your period. There is always a chance and your chances are 100 times stronger when you are not on birth control and he is not using a condom.

Q: I am a guy and I wanna babysit to make money but everyone tells me thats a womans job. What should I do?

It's not just a womans job. Alot of times they say this because they say most woman mature before men do. Im my opinion I would like someone who is mature who doesnt sit and talk or text on their cell phone the entire time. my kids are full of energy and love to be play with and to constantly run. I need someone to keep up with them rather thats a male or female as long as i feel i can trust them

Q: my soon to be husband moved my daughter and me into his house this past january its been real nice up untill lately his brother lives there also and another room mate well his 40 year old brother doesnt pay rent or pay bills or even buy food for the house he lops around doing nothing at all sleeps all day and up all night. He just recently started being smart towards my family and my daughter by the way she sleeps in the den he has his own room she is 14 and he doesnt give her no privtecy last night i went to cook and he through out all the forks and spoons that i use to cook with . how can i get this loser to leave i have told my boyfriend and he just feels sorry for this bs of a what he thinks is a man i want him to leave i pay the bills and buy food he doesnt do nothing what can i do to get him out ?

Honestly. I don't 100% agree with the other answers. Making your fiance choose between his family and you is a awful feeling. Ive been there before. You need to sit down with your husband be like hey I really understand you feel sorry and you care about your brother but I think we as a couple should pick a dead line. Giving your brother a month or 2 months to find a job and help with the bills or he needs to move out and in the mean time you have a lot of people in the home set up a schedule where they can each wash the dishes once or twice a week or do laundry give him something to do around the week so you all arent stressed out and feel a little bit better about the situation right now im married with 2 kids my father and my cousin all live in a smal 2 bedroom house.

Q: I'm a twelve year old girl and need cash...fast.
I owe:
$29 to my mom for not returning books borrowed from the library using her card
$6 more to my mom for breaking her compact powder (I'm clumsy)
$10.65 to library for books not returned
I also need a lot of extra cash because we're taking a trip in five days. My mom deprived me of $50 (birthday money I just got yesterday) because of the $35 I owe her. Add in all those expenses and that leaves me with... negative $90.35. ( I have $5) I also need to buy summer clothes (my closet is full of sweatshirts and long pants). Help!!!!!!! :(

it sounds to me you only owe 10.65 which you already have 5 dollars of. your best bet at your age is to stay away from the library if you cant return the books help elderly people at the grocery store takes there stuff to their car load it for them, mow lawns or weeding gardens. your not going to get a real job your way to young.

bio

My name is Ashley. I am 22 years old. Ill be celebrating my 3rd 21st birthday June :) . I had my first child at 15. I got married at 18 and had another child shortly after. They have two different fathers. I am currently going threw a divorce. I moves states after we seperated ( ugly seperation) but I had no family in that state. I left everything except my beautiful babies and our clothes. I found a job up north and things are going good. I am dating. I have been in abusive situations. I am going to college for psychology and sociaology. Im here to listen help and give you advice ive been in alot of different situations and can relate to a lot.