I have a teen daugter she is 13 and she goes to the mall all the time which I don't mind.But she always brings home clothes and says their her friends or something like that and I found 1 price tag in her room...she has a history of shoplifting but do you think shes at it again ?
Has she ever been arrested for shoplifting in her history? If not, it would likely be a valuable lesson in what's right, what's wrong, and how embarrassing it is to be hauled off in handcuffs for all of her friends, and the public, to see. She needs to learn that shoplifting isn't a simple breaking of the rules- it is a crime.
An option would be, next time she goes to the mall, call and alert security to keep their eyes open to her. It may seem like you'd be playing dirty pool, but it is for he own good. [ Brandi_S's advice column | Ask Brandi_S A Question ]
holahayley56 answered Sunday April 29 2007, 1:42 am: Sounds like it.
What did you do the first time when she shoplifted?
If my mom caught me shoplifting, i'd never get to go to the mall again.
maybe try 'catching her in the act' like, when you drive her up to the mall or something, stay there. and like hide behind clothing racks or something, haha.
honestly though, if she did it once. i think you should just say.. "i've found price tags or whatever in your room, and ya know it looks like you've been shoplifting again, your not going to the mall anymore. inless im with you. infact, your not going anywhere, without me."
she'll probably scream and yell at you and tell you she hates you for that, and say that your so unfair, and that she doesnt even do that anymore, and that you just dont trust her, and want her to be miserable.
AskJR answered Wednesday April 25 2007, 11:33 am: Unfortunately yes. She is shoplifting and expecting you to accept her excuses of friends giving her the clothes or buying them for her.
It speaks for itself. She shoplifted before, and now is smarter than she was and better at it.
But, she will get caught eventually. The more often you do something, the closer and increased chance of consequence follows. It's a gamble and she will eventually loose.
Do not allow her to go to the mall again unless YOU take her and are with her supervising her. Simple.
Don't allow her to continue this and to continue to lie to you and treat you like you are a dumb mother that is gullible.
Yes, she IS shoplifiting. Take it from a mother of two daughters and a son that went through it and all the excuses that follows the deed. [ AskJR's advice column | Ask AskJR A Question ]
xkatiex answered Monday April 23 2007, 4:00 am: I was doing the same things when i was that age and used the same excuse. I would almost guarantee that she is shoplifting. It is so hard to get out of, because it is extremely addictive. She needs to get caught. I have no idea how you can achieve this but once she gets caught it might snap her right out of it.
xoxoxo katie [ xkatiex's advice column | Ask xkatiex A Question ]
turn-n-burn answered Tuesday March 27 2007, 1:30 pm: Look for receipts ask her friends and all and keep an eye out for about how much money she has to spend and how much she comes back with. She could be or she couldnt be. You might also want to see if you can get her to talk to you about it openley and if she comes around to tell you that she is then you might want to say ground her from shopping for a week or something until she gets the point that it is NOT OK! [ turn-n-burn's advice column | Ask turn-n-burn A Question ]
orphans answered Sunday March 25 2007, 4:42 pm: Duh???
Just call the police. They will not arrest her, nor will they harm her. They can help you on your problem. You can all work together, the mall, you and police.
I have no experience but obviously your daughter does not realise the consequences.
Example. I ve met boys that have been to jail. Instead of being ashamed about it, they were proud about it.
So something similar is happening with your daughter right about now. Just check it out. [ orphans's advice column | Ask orphans A Question ]
LoveNJstyle answered Sunday March 25 2007, 10:24 am: If you only found one price tag... that's kinda suspicious. she might be at it again. you should ask her how much she spent on stuff. i usually tell my mom if i found a good sale on something and i'm older than your daughter. ask for recipts... she might not have all of them (they are easily lost) but if she isn't stealing she'll at least have one. <3 [ LoveNJstyle's advice column | Ask LoveNJstyle A Question ]
abcleah answered Sunday March 25 2007, 2:43 am: i have shoplifted before,
and that was the excuse i used
not saying that you daughter IS,
but i'm not saying she isn't either
look for reciepts, that's the only way to know if she isn't stealing [ abcleah's advice column | Ask abcleah A Question ]
DearAbby92 answered Sunday March 25 2007, 1:02 am: As a teen, I know parents can jump to conclusions easily and it can be very agravating, so consider everythign before making a desicion or saying something.
She always brings home clothes and says they are her friends?
Next time she comes home, ask to see what she bought. If she bought it all, there will be receipts. And also as a teenage girl, it's hard to tear a girl away from her clothes, so her friends wouldnt lend her all their clothes. You can ask if she has any clothes of her friends that she borrowed that needed to be washed and returned to see if they really are her friends clothing.
Do not search her room or go through her things without permission. Destroying the trust between you two will lead to plenty of problems.
If all else fails, just talk to your daughter (calmly) Ask her straight forward, but do not over react or loose your cool. Explain all the consequences of shoplifting and how it could ruin her life, basically. It sounds corny or something you'd hear from Dr. Phil, but communication is key.
summerGIRL_xo answered Saturday March 24 2007, 11:26 pm: it seems like she is shoplifting, especially if she's had a history. if she always says "oh they're my friends", it seems kind of fishy. why would she constantly be bringing home her friends' clothing? however, don't jump to any conclusions. if you suddenly jump down her throat and accuse her, she'll get angry and shut herself off. instead, try calmly approaching her about it. you could say that you're not trying to assume anything, and you know she's a good girl, but tell her the consequences of shoplifting - jail, etc. some collages won't accept people who have a criminal record, even if it's shoplifting. you may be able to scare her or guilt her into not doing it anymore, but remember to mantain a calm, respectful tone. if she continues to do it, you need to take some kind of parental action. shoplifting has very serious consequences and you need to find some way to make her stop. [ summerGIRL_xo's advice column | Ask summerGIRL_xo A Question ]
MAK answered Saturday March 24 2007, 11:23 pm: she might be. its really hard to tell. dont talk to her about it yet. when you have solid proof is when you can confront her and punish her. meanwhile, casually mention the consequences of shoplifting in conversation. and never confront her in front of her friends. she will be very embarassed, and wil not be fully concentrating on what you say, but more on her friends reactions.
if she does shoplift, talk to her about it in her room (that way she cant slam the door on you if shes that type of teen). tell her that shoplifint will not be tolerated in your household.
also, when she goes shopping, give her money (not too much and not too little), and limit the amount of times that she can shop. (for example only 3 times a month). also make sure that she goes with those that are not shoplifters (if you know such details about her friends).
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