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All of my friends are really worried about me because I cut myself. My parents don't know I still cut, but they know that I used to. I'm addicted to hurting myself and I don't want to stop. Everyone wants to change me but I refuse to. How do I get everyone to stop trying to get me to change?
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look, your friends, just want what is best for you. and you need to get help.look, i used to know someone who cut their self, and no one got them the help they needed, and they eventually killed theirself, b/c she felt no one cared. so seriously, get into some help, because no one wants anything bad to happen to you.
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The only way the want you to stop is because the dont like to see you get hurt al the time. I know it is a bad habbit, but you need to stop. I have to agree with your friends and everyone eles.
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Look
people only are trying to change u because they love you and they care about you. Chances are that they no what they are talking about and they are just trying to help u out. if someone wants to help u out sit down and listen to the words that they have to say, it might not mean anything to u but at least it makes them feel better. Hope that helped
LIA AND SAMANTHA
this is answered by samantha
Cutting is a form of relieving depression. One of my best friends cut herself for the same reasons as you (She was addicted to pain too) and every single day I was so afraid of losing her. Like I'd think when she told me she wasn't gonna stop, "What if my best friend dies?" I was really... scared. That's why people are trying to change you. Not 'cause they wanna be all up in your life. It's 'cause they love you. And because you remind me of my friend, I really want to help you.
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location) This is the website for safe alternatives. It's really helpful in understanding a lot of your feelings. And as for how to get your family to leave you alone? There's no way, to be honest. Your family and friends will ALWAYS care for you. I hope to hear from you again.
LIA AND SAMANTHA
This Question was answered by Lia
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First of all, your friends wnat you to change for a good reason, so don't be mad at them. Most people who mutilate themselves don't do it to die thwy just do it to replace pain with pain, but they probably don't know that and are just scared that you may cut yourself and accidently kill yourself. You should find a better coping skill to deal with your problems. Try to analyze your situations before reacting, then once you have calmed down and really seen how bad or how not bad the problem is take action in solving it without cutting. Fighting an addiction can be pretty hard, but try my suggestion a couple of times and see where it gets you. Goodluck!
P.S. let me know how it goes
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i get u i used to do it to but im not gonna tell u to stop if u dont want to jus tell them to leave u alone.
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I know you don't want to hear it, but these people love you, and that is why they are concerned that you hurt yourself. However much they want you to change, you can only suceed if you yourself want to. Please look at yourself and decide that now is time for change - you cannot do this forever. Good luck.
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In this case your the one with the problem not them. Come on your cutting yourself for whatever reasons they may be. They are just worried about you, in any case many people would be worried about their friends do this only because the out come relays in more deaths than sucessful completion of rehabilitation. So before I say everyone has the problem but me, I would look at myself and what I'm do to cause them to worry about me so much.
Cspinoza1
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Alright, I'm all for getting people to stop bothering you and trying to make you change, but you have to stop cutting. Cutting is BAD. It's good that you realize you're addicted, but being addicted to cutting versus coffee, or something, is not necessarily a good thing...
To get them to stop trying to make you change, you have to stop what's causing them to bother you. In this case, it would be your cutting habits.
Don't think of it as "changing," so much. Think of it as healing. If you can heal, then they will stop trying to make you change. Good luck.
-Siren
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Wow.. just wow.. that's EXACTLY how I was 1 year ago! But i've changed now. Ok here's the deal. Everyone is trying to get you to change because they care about you. They wouldn't try so hard if they don't care, and I know that if one of MY friends was cutting him/herself.. I'd never give up on trying to get them to stop until they do stop. You probably will not be able to get them to stop, unless you stop yourself first.
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I know exactly how you feel because, everyone wants you to change and they all want you to be perfect . But the thing is that you aren't important . You have to tell anyone thats trying to change you that this is the real you, and let them know that you are not perfect . You are too
nice and you care too much about what others want
you to be and do . Some advice: what others always want you to be isn't always best for you .
So the question is , what do you want to do . It's good that you refuse to change your self for others . Never loose yourself for anyone . AND STOP CUTTING YOURSELF BEFORE YOU REALLY REALLY CAUSE YOURSELF A REALLY BAD INJURY .
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The simple answer: change. Of course, that isn't what you want to hear. I used to be in your position, and I didn't want to hear it either. Sometimes, I still struggle with wanting to hurt myself. I am well aware that it is extremely difficult to stop and easier to just keep doing it and pretend that you don't need to change.
You should realize that if you do not stop, your friends may wind up telling your parents that you still do it. It is only a matter of time before they find out.
Every time you cut yourself, you are not just hurting yourself. You are hurting people that love you. The more you hurt yourself, the more you hurt them, and the more likely it is they will do something drastic to get you to stop.
I highly suggest you talk to a counselor or some other adult figure you trust about the situation. This isn't coming from somebody who doesn't know what it's like; it's coming from somebody who still has nasty scars from her own self-mutilation.
You may not like my advice, but I believe your letter is a call for help, whether you realize it or not. I am quite sure you knew before writing it that most, if not all, of the people who answered it would not be giving you the solutions you say you are looking for. There is a reason you are hurting yourself. Please - try to find out what it is and where this is coming from.
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Change. If you don't want to change, then methinks you have a problem. They want you to change because they love you. And if you don't listen to them, who will you have then? Yourself, a self-mutilator? Think about it.
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The reason they are trying to get you to change is because they care about you. The only way to make them stop is for them to no longer care about you and I am pretty sure they wont stop caring until you are dead. Which could very well happen if you keep cutting. You dont necessarily have to change who you are to stop, but let these people love you and show you that you dont need this. You dont have to do this sort of thing. Allow them to care about you.
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What you are doing isnt healthy and you need to stop. Why in the frist place to you do it! its not smart! Your friends are caring for you and they worry about you. Its life, but what your doing isnt! Its not healthy at all!!!! i dont know how to say this either, why do you want to hurt yourself, just think of this its a phrase someone told me a LONG time ago, when you hurt yourself its hurts your friends and family more, even if they dont know exactly what your doing they know something is wrong, so they arnt sure if they should ask. So please stop hurting yourself, it hurts me too.
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You have to understand that what you are doing is unhealthy, and that is why everyone that cares about you is trying to make you stop. Cutting yourself will solve nothing, it just takes the pain away breifey. You need to start finding better ways to deal with your problems. Do you ever speak to a counsler? Just talking out your problems to a non-partial person may help a lot. I know this is not what you want to hear, but I also hope that you do change.
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