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Hiya, my names Claire. I'm 16 and I live in England. I live with my dad, my older brother and my younger sister. I have a pretty complicated family situation, so although yours may not be the same, I can probably replate to something of the confusion and hurt people with broken families feel.I'm a Christian, and I guess that is reflected in most of my responses to questions. Compared to some people, I've had a pretty good 16 years of life so far, not huge amounts to complain about. But there have been times when I've really needed to rely on God to pull me through and he's never EVER failed me. I trust his promises completely, and I depend on Christ with all my heart
advice
another question sparked these thoughts in my head. im 16/f, i havent been baptized and i dont think anyone in my imediate family [or any of my family, idk] has been baptized, but we all believe strongly in God and are Christians and do go to church every now and again [we are not morning people haha]. well i was wondering if youre not baptized but you believe in God and believe he is your creater and that he sent Jesus to die for you do you still go to Hell? the reason i havent been baptized 1- is because i dont want to be dunked into a tub in front of a bunch of people for one thing and 2- i feel as if i dont know enough about that stuff to be baptized. i know the jist of it and yes i believe in Jesus as my Savior, but i dont know, i dont know all the people associated with the religion and what they did in history and stuff. but i do live my life for God. that being said, i sin. i know everybody does. im not a bad kid though. im clean as far as cussing [
Hey!
To get to heaven, this is what the bible says:
-- Accept that you are a sinful person. Looks like you've got that part sorted! "that being said, i sin. i know everybody does" So you accept that you need to be saved.
-- Believe that Jesus Christ is God's own Son, sent to live a perfect life, yet still take all the punishment for your sin, to suffer the death that you deserve, to freely offer you forgiveness, so that you can be in a relationship with God forever. Believe that amazing news, and trust Him to forgive you.
-- Commit your life to God. It's great to believe in God, but even the devil believes. If you believe what God has done for you, and love him completely, make a commitment to live for Him. That doesn't mean you'll never sin, but it means you've repented of your sin, which means you do a complete U-turn. Run from sin, towards God, and hate it a much as he does. Sure you'll stumble and fall, but God forgives us everytime, picks us up and keeps helping us.
The Bible helps us to live for Go, and so does His holy spirit. Even if you're not going to church, reading the bible is the best for working out exactly what God says about things, and strengthening your faith.
So there you go. Accept, believe and commit.
As for baptism, the bible is clear that baptism is not a requirement for salvation. It's an outward sign of what has already happened on the inside. When you have become a Christian, and been forgiven, God washes you clean on the iside, yes? He washes away everything you've ever done wrong. Jesus commands us to be baptised as a sign to the rest of the world that we've been forgiven. But don't let anyone tell you that you can only go to Heaven if you've been baptised!
As for not agreeing with historical religion and religious people and stuff, I completely agree. Some awful things have happened in the name of religion, people often bring up the crusades, holy wars, extremists. On a smaller, everyday scale, so many people who claim to be Christian pr of any other faith, are very hypocritical. So all I can say is, don't judge Christianity by Christians. We screw up, we do stuff wrong, we fail God so often. Judge Christianity by Christ. Read about him, see who he really is, get to know him better, and then if you want the world to see that you beling to him, thats why should be baptised, not because you agree with "religion."
One more thing. A lot of churches do evening services, which are often livlier than morning services nowadays. If you're serious about getting to know more about God and what it means to live for him, do a little research in to local churches, and see if they have something to offer you - midweek groups, youth groups, evening services.
I hopw that's cleared a few things up. Ask me if there's anything else I can help with!
God bless
xxx
Me and my boyfriend dated for a year and 9 months. We were very close but we broke up over a month ago because he says we need space. Now we arent going to date again (he said maybe next year.. but im not waiting that long) Yes i do love him, i love him alot. But its hard to love someone when they dont love you back and want to string you along til next year. Although me and his roommate and me have gotten pretty close, and now we sort of have a thing for eachother. His roommate doesnt know i have a thing for him i just told him we'd talk later this weekend when he told me that he really liked me. What should i do. this happans to be my x bf of almost 2 years roommate.. (they arent the best of friends either..)&& what do i say when me and his roommate talk about our liking towards eachother?
(ill rate five for a good answer)
Ok, so you seem pretty clear that you don't want to go out with your ex boyfriend again. Thats fair enough he wants you to just sit around waiting for him until he decides he wants you back. Thats not fair of him, it seems the best thing for you to do just to try and get over h im, you're too good for him. It might take time, but the sooner you're over him, the freer you'll feel.
So the issue with his roommate. Do you think it's going to get in the way of their friendship? Do you think it will be awkward because it's your ex's roomate? I don't really think any of this would be a problem. When you talk to this guy, be as honest as you can be with him, tell him how you feel, what you want to happen. If they're not the best of friends anyway, it shouldn't really affect their friendship. See how he feels about the whole thing...
Make sure you're feeling happy and confident in yourself before getting in to another relationship. When you've been with someone so long, its easy to feel kind of lost without a relationship, and a lot of people then jump in to new relationships very quickly without getting over the first. So take your time over everything, make sure you've moved on completely from your ex, you've given everything time to settle down, make sure this new guy doesn't think there'll be a problem with you being the ex of his roomate, and then go for it!
When you talk to him, just be honest, be you, and everything should work out ok!
Let me know if I completely missed the point of that, and I'll see what I can do! God bless xxx
hi my name is lolo im 16 and i just needed a little bit of advice concerning me and my boyfriend, well we have just started gon out a few days before christmas and no the excitment seems like it has died down extremely too low, and it seems as if everything i say to him he fusses back with me like i said something wrong and all i do is share my feelings with him truthfully and he talks to me like he doesnt believe me, and it feels like, why even talk to him if he doesnt believe a word i say, and he argues with ever single thing, and i really love him alot bt i want him tothink about things b-4 he critizes. what should i do? signed lolo3847
It seems like you're trying to talk to him open and honestly, but he just isn't listening to you.
You need to think about what you deserve from a boyfriend. You deserve someone who's going to listen to you, believe what you're saying and respect your views. It's really important that you understand what you deserve from a boyfriend, don't let anyone push you around.
At the same time, make sure you're taking the time to listen to what he's saying. It may seem annoying and frustrating that he's arguing with you all the time, but listen to see if he has a valid point and take it on board if he does.
So I think you have two options.
If the two of you are going to stay together, he needs to understand how you're feeling. Write him a long letter, explain everything, what you want to say to him, ow it feels when he critises you, why you don't like him arguing with everything you say. Tell him you love him but let him know how you feel because if he really loves you, he'll listen and do smoething about it.
However, if the excitement is gone, and you're not happy in a relationship, get out of it. When we're only 16, you can't expect relationships to last forever, and if it's not working ,dont stay together for the sake of it, get out before you get hurt. You deserve to be happy.
Good luck, and God bless xxx
My breasts are kinda cone shaped, they're not round. Is this normal? It seems as if so many girls' breat are round, not cone shaped. I'm very self concience about this and won't even let my boyfriend see me naked. We've been together for 8 months now, and he gets pritty upset, 'cause he thinks I don't trust him. But please, tell me..Is it normal? I feel so weird and disgusting when I look at them. And plus, one is WAY smaller then the other, and that just adds to the self concience-ness. It's not like it's a small differce, it's a HUGE differnce between sizes. It's very noticable, but I cannot have surgery being as I've only just turned 17. So again, please! Just tell me if this is normal or not. I want COMPLETE honesty. Thank you so much. God bless.
Hey, mine are pretty much the same. It annoys me, but yeah, they'll setlle in to whats best for your body soon enough. I know it feels weird, but I doubt there's many girls who haven't had surgery, who are completely happy with their breasts. But to the rest of the world, they look completely normal!
Shapes vary greatly, I actually read something once listing all the differet shapes of breats you can get! Some are round, some are cone-ish. Some point in, some point out, some seem to defy the laws of gravity, some sag a lot.
But then, ask the boyfriends of all these girls who are not hapy with their breasts, and all the guys will say they love them!
Your boyfriend loves you. All of you. You have no idea how scared I was before I let my boyfriend (at the time) see me naked, I'd been with him about 8 months too. And he knew exactly which parts of me I was most self conscious about, and he went through them all and said how beautiful they were. Don't let him pressure you, but at the same time don't be scared but he won't be dissapointed. Hope you can learn to love yourself as much as your boyfriend does and as much as God does! xxxx
okay. does anyone know what the symptoms are for TSS?
because although my period was 2 weeks ago, I just found a tampon inside of me. ewww....
and I've been feeling really ill for about two weeks. so can anyone help me see if I can diagnose this(without going to the dr)
Symptoms of TSS may be similar to severe flu, initially. They include:
vomiting
diarrhoea
a sunburn-like rash
muscle aches
a sudden high temperature (fever)
drowsiness or confusion
fainting and/or dizziness,
and collapse.
Patients look pale, and have a high pulse rate. Children with shock will often show confusion as an early sign.
It's very rare to get it, only 4 or 5 tampon related cases a year. But if you have those symptons, its VERY important to get it checked out with a doctor!
me and my bf were messing around and he came on me, i had silk shorts and panties and he had some kind of boxers can i still be pregant this is the first day i miss my period but im scared .. can i be pregnant answer fast pleasE!!!!
Think about it. Is there any way his sperm could have entered your vagina? If you both had underwear on, I'd say its highly unlikely, but only you were there, so if you think there's any way it could have happened, then there's a possibility. But, if you both had some kind of clothing on all the time, and you don't think it could have seeped through (I guess it depends on the clothing!) then no. You can't be pregnant. Only you know really...
Sperm + vagina = possible pregancy.
Sperm on to hands on to vagina = possible pregnancy.
No contact at all between sperm and vagina = no possibility of pregnancy.
If you're worried, get tested!
Can you get pregant from dry humping? Like if both people have all there clothes on.
~Eli
No. If you are both fully clothed, no sperm can come in contact with the vagina. If sperm cannot enter the vagina, you cannot get pregnant.
so im 14 and i met this guy that makes my heart melt. weve only see each other in person once at a party. but we have been talking and he invites me to ahngout with his friends. but my parents dont know his friends and i dont know his friends so i know for a fact my parents wont let me go. so i ahve been saying im sick. or i have other things to do. i dont want to tell him that but i feel embaressed when i have to say oh well my parents dont trust my judgement enough to make the right friends. no besides the fact his friends arent the perfect crowd i would never get under hte influnce of perpressuer. i am very responsiable. but my parents dont see that. they see me as some slut. so its aggervateing but. i just told him all of this and he seemed totaly cool i guess with meeting my mom but now i feel if he thinks im so child. we are the same age and in the same grade. but still do you think he would possible think less of me or think im some kind of child?
He sounds like a great guy!
Think about it...
--He met you at a party once, now he wants to get to know you better.
--He's asked to meet up with you, even though you made excuses.
--He wants you to meet him friends, and show them how cool you are!
--You told all the stuff about your parents, and he's still keen!
I don't think he thinks any less of you at all.
To make this work, talk to your mum. Explain how much you like this guy, that you think he really is a decent guy, that you know you're responsible enough to make sensible decisions and not be influenced by peer pressure. Have a calm, mature discussion with her, and see where that leaves you.
As for him, let him know exactly whats going on. If you can introduce him to your mum, even better. Don't do anything behind your parents backs, that will make them trust you a lot less in the future. Just keep the communication going, parents feel a lot happier if they feel informed and know whats going on! Good luck xxxx
ok so im a little young i guess to know wat i am. But i do i think, eneyways i think im well bi and theres this girl shes my best friend and i love and i dont mean that in a friendly way i mean it in a serious way so i dont know if im bi or if i only have a girl crush err love. But thetres this other girl shes bi shes one grade higher than me and i think she likes me i know for a fact well i think my best friend who im in love with is straight but i dont know. So enyways the girl in the higher grade shes hott and i think i may like her ugh this is so confusing for me i hate it so what should i do? err what am? i mean i reaally love my best friend shes hott,beautiful,funny,and smar shes my everything but alex i kinda like shes different and shes pretty and umm hott err what ever so could some one please please help me out here!!!
Ok, well for a start you say you're a little young. And you recognise that at your age its hard to guess what orientation you are. So don't put any labels on yourself yet! You may be bi, you may be straight, you'll have to wait and see, but in the mean time, don't pressure yourself to feel a certain way about anything by labelling yourself. Just accept the current situation and think about dealing with that, rather than whether or not you're bi.
As for the situation with your friend, well especially if you are young, you could well freak her out by letting her know ow you feel. However, if you are really close friends and you feel like you could talk to her about this sort of thing, then try this:
Don't tell her specifically how you feel about her at first, just have a general chat about liking guys, liking girls, see if she has any strong views on the subject. If, for instance, she said that she thinks its really weird to be bi, and that she's defiantely straight, then well, don't tell her that you're in love with her!
If she seems quite open about it, and you feel its appropriate, maybe you could you Alex as an example? Say that you think she likes you or something... yeah just try and chat to your friend about it. From that conversation, you can probably work out whether she is defaintely straight, or a bit flexible...
She's your best friend. Don't push anything. There's no way you want to lose a friendship over what could be a passing crush. If anything's going to develop, it will, but in time. There's no rush. Don't scare her off, just enjoy being her best friend.
As for the other girl, I think you said she was called Alex, well thats up to you really.
If you want anything to happen with her, get to know her properly, just as you would in any relationship, and take things slow. But don't take your chances with her just because she's a girl and its exciting that a girl likes you!
Good luck! xxx
My mother is an alcholic. She wont admit this, but she drinks 3-4 times a week and gets wasted. How can I confront her about this? My stepdad agrees with me but will not do anything to stop her. What can I do?
Hey, I know exactly how you feel (having experienced the same thing.)
No-one can stop her but herself. It hurts so much, but you can't make her stop. Your step ddad can't make her stop. Only she can.
Before she stops, she needs to recognise that she has a problem. It might be that she already knows it in her heart, but won't admit it to herself. Alcoholism is an illness, and part of the illness means that you lie to yourself so much about the addiction that you believe you don't have a problem. With my mum, she was drinking loads every day, but still wouldn't accept it.
So if you want to help her, you can try helping her to realise that she has a problem.
This is going to take a lot of patience on your part, because its the most frustrating thing.
I'd suggest that you start writing things down. Keep a sort of diary of when she drinks, and whatever details you know, such as what time of day it was, and how much she drank. Just keep writing things down.
Also, a common sign of an alcoholic is that they hide bottles around the house. Subtley, have a look for these. Try places like bathroom cupboards, under cushions on the couch, anywhere that you might want to hide something. If you can expose hidden alcohol, and just leave it out where she'll she it with a note that says "Mum, I found this today." She'll know you found it, and feel guilty, That helps her to recognise.
With the diary, when you have enough information to show that she has a problem, confront her with it. You might want to ask your step dad to help, but that depends on how he feels about the situation and your relationship with him. You might want him onside, or that might be impossible. Personally, I have a fear of confrontation with my mums drinking. Well, I used to, I've had to get used to it by now. But if you can't stand the thought of actually taking it to her and saying, "mum, you have a problem, look at this." Then you could leave it on her bed or something with a note. This is why I would do.
If you want to know any more about how I handled situations like this, or any more advice, or just to talk to someone who knows what you're going through, leave a message in my inbox and we can talk.
Take care, good luck xxxx
When did ya'll start having sex? What's the average age that people become sexually active?
Thankss
I'm not going to have sex until I'm married, but I guess that's not average... I'd say average would be about 15 or 16, depending on who and where you're asking. A lot of people don't become sexually active until they find the right person, whether that's when they're 15 or 25. Others, like me, choose to wait till marriage.
Some girls choose to go on the pill, some don't. It doesn't really matter, because either way, you still need to wear a condom to prevent STDs and HIV. No pill can protect against them. xxx
me and my boyfriend had sex the other night and he came on my bum, he wiped it off with a towel but then wiped my vagina with the same spot. Could i be pregnant?
Yes you could be. If there's any chance of his sperm entering your vagina, you could be pregnant. Go get tested! xxx
16/f
okay well me and my bf have been going out for 8 months and day before yesterday i spent the night with my friend but he thought i was going to cheat on him or lie to him about something well, later on that nite i told my bf that i was gonna get ymy phone charger from him then go back to her house well instead me and my friends went to a party. my bf found out this was around 2 in the morning well my bf found out but played it off like he had no idea but there was a couple guys there that knew him and called him but after the party i went over to his house and spent the nite over there and talked well we're still together but he is still a little wierd around and i understand he cant trust me anymore but someone help how should i get things to the way they were before.. i rate high!!
If he doesn't trust you because you lied to him... well you gotta earn his trust back. Talking is always the best way, be upfront about everything that happened, explain the whole situation to him, why you did whatever, apologise for anything you did wrong, and then leave it... try and be the best girlfriend to him you can, make it up to him. And be completely trustworthy in everything, so that he won't have any ammunition to trhow at you from now on... as in, if he asks you something be completely honest, so you can earn his trust again. And let him know you love him completely :)
The people who answer when you call suicide hotline are trained professnials.I want to learn from them by calling suicide hotline and learning how the convince people not to suicide.So please help me come up with a story that would make me comitte suicide.
You can get far better training in counselling suicidal people than pretending to be one yourself. You won't be able to work out what techniques they use and how they help just by using one example, because their response to you will depend completely on the situation you give, and it would be different in all different situations. If you really want to know how to help people, get proper training so you know how to deal with a number of situations.
Alright...Im a 15/f
I have a boyfriend of almost 4 months now. and known eachother since 7th grade.
I love him....
i just dont know if i like him.
When i talk to him....Sometimes i get pissed off and he hasnt really even done anything im just sick of talking to him. and then theres times where he deserves me to be mad at him and i just cant be.
I have no idea what to do!!!
Break up or not?
Break up with him. There's no point in staying together if you're losing the feelings you had for him. Don't feel bad about it, this is what happens in relationships, especially as a teenager. Just explain to him that you don't feel the same as you used to, and move on, don't get stuck in a relationship thats annoying you. It's not fair on him either. xxxxx
okay ive been goin out with this guy for around a week or two now and i really like him.... i told him that i hadnt snogged anyone yet and he said that was fine and that we could take it slowly now snogging isnt really that big of a deal and i really want to.... but everytime i go to my nerves get the better of me and i chicken out and i really dont no what to do i told him this and he said it was fine but i really want to. How do i get over my nerves and just go for it im more scared of doing something wrong but now its stopping me from going places with him incase i have to...its really stupid and i really like him so if anyones got any ideas please help lol
thanks
When you've never done it before it seems like a really scary thing... you've gotta make yourself comfortable with the idea. It sounds like you can talk to him about it without being embarrassed and he soundsd really nice and understanding, which is great.
So tell him that it would make you less scared if he just kissed you on the lips first, so its not a full on snog. Get used to being that close to him physically, and then it will feel a lot easier and more natural to go for it, when you're ready. And just remember you won't do it wrong! If you really like him, and he really likes you, then you're good, it won't go wrong!
I'm 16/f and I love my boyfriend more than anything in the world and i know he loves me that much too. When we are together we have such an awesome time and I can really see how much he is in love with me. The problem is that he is always so busy, he works a lot and does lots of work on boats around our harbour and owns two boats of his own which he also has to maintain. Apart from that he's always helping out in his family and other people but it just sometimes seems like he doesn't have time for me. He tells me he would much rather be with me than be working. Not only working but he also is busy with other things too. For example this week I've seen him twice for about 2 hours each time and he had to go out after that. I go over to visit him but he's never there and is always busy. We really get annoyed that we don't get much time together and sometimes I just don't feel loved. Like right now, this morning, even though he told me last night he loved me I know he does but sometimes I just feel like he doesn't. Even though I KNOW he does. Please help, what do I do?!
Thankyou
Yeah I think you should talk to him. Tell him that you appreciate he's busy and has a life of his own, but as your boyfriend, he's made a commitment to you, and needs to give you some priority in his life. Talk it through togeother and work out some good times when you want to see each other and maybe it'll involve both of you making little sacrifices, but he needs to decide how important your relationship is to him. If you're feeling unloved even though he tells you, the relationship won't survive long, talk to him!
ok so on wednesday. i have to get my bottom braces off. but i still have a baby tooth left. its on the top on the left side in the back. and the toothe underneath already grew in so its like on the side of my tooth on the inside. and if i cant get it to come out. they have to extract it. but the thing is its not htat loose. and it hurts now becuse i have tried so hard to get it out. i dont want to get it extracted. so how can i get ti to fall out.
so what im asking is:
whats an extraction>? (liek what do they do?
and
how can i get it to come out without the pain!?!?!
and fast.
I was exactly the same, I tried for ages to make my baby tooth come out so they wouldn't pull it out, but I couldn't get it out...
When they were extracting it, they just put this gel stuff on my gum to make it go a little num, then put 2 injections in my gum, one on either side, waited till it had gone compeltely numb and then pulled it. The injection was the bit that hurt, and it feels like your mouth is really fat when its numb but it isnt!
Thank you so much you helped me a lot!! I will give you feedback. (5)
Anytime, I'm glad I could help. :) Thanks for the rating. xxx
I am 13 and i had my period a year ago and none since. But i have been having discharge.
Hey, don't worry, I was the same. I had one random period, and then I didn't have one again for ages and ages, and then it started regularly about 18 months later. Discharge is normal from about 2 years before your period starts, so all it means is you'll be starting sometime possibly in the next year or so. If you're worried about the discharge, you can you pantyliners in your knickers that stop it being in your pants, they work just like really small thin pads. They can make you feel more confident while you're waiting for your period to start.
Hope that helps, don't forget all girls develop at different times, and if you get worried that you're not normal, just have a quick check with a doctor. If theres anything else I can help with, leave me a message in my inbox.
xxxxx