name -->> sara elaine
age -->> 15
-->> i love to give advice cause i go through a lot of tough stuff everyday.. & i do think that i can realy help u out if u want me too.
xO-sara
E-mail: Beyootifulbabe@netscape.net
Gender: Female
Age: 15
AIM: BeYooTiFulBabe
Member Since: December 2, 2004
Answers: 39
Last Update: March 13, 2006
Visitors: 2565
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so last night my ex boyfriend called to talk. it was around 11:45. well i have not talked to him in about 2 or3 weeks which is my fault becuase i have not felt that i could talk to him without getting upset. well anyway for some reason i picked up. well the converstion was basichey how have you been what you been up to and so one. and then for some reason i started to get upset and quiet. he kept asking me what was wrong but i would not tell him that i was upset becuase it is still hard to talk to him without getting upset anyway he acted mad becuase i wouldnt tell him waht was wrong and was like know i dont like being lied to and i just said dont worry about it. should i have told him that it stillhurts to talk to him even though i do love him. and it has been a month since we broke up. why would he get mad and upset because i would not tell him what is wrong. is this a sign that he is hurt to or that some part of him still wants to be with me. he wants me to pick him up next week should i? he did not say why? (link)
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so the two other responses you've gotten are basically the same so i'm gona try to help you see it from another stand point. im going through something very similar & it hurts & it's so hard. im not going to sit here & say i know how you feel, cause i don't know your whole situation but i can say that i relate to the general feeling of being heartbroken & not sure if you should cut him out completely, be friends, or pursue something more. but i'd say follow your gut feeling. definately telling him whats wrong & how hard its been since you guys broke up & that him calling out of the blue almost hurts more then him not calling at all. maybe if you want to be friends let him know that.. or if youre not ready to be friends, let him know that. he doesnt need to know whats wrong & shouldnt get mad if you dont tell him. but it seems like the reason he called was to make sure you were doing alright & by holding it in that youre not, youre sorta shutting him out when he's only trying to be there for you. about having him pick you up or not, like i said, follow your gut feeling.. but id say go.. you dont want to have regrets & wonder what he wanted or what would have happend.
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Well I used to be friends with this girl named Kristina and I told her I liked my best friend Zach and then the next day she was all over hi and I was like what the heck !? and they were getting ready to make their realationship public and I i.med him last night and said so are you going out with the slut yet ? He said I should shut up about the people he likes and I said why you dont even understand and he kept yelling at me so then I told him why because I loved him and I started crying and everything and I seen him today and he was all over her and it made me sick because even after our talk he still was over her so I dont know what to do I cant really talk to him anymore it feels werid. & I promised myself I would fall for him and thats exactly what I did I dont know what to do. & today he is just acting like nothing is wrong and thats not the case I am very hurt I cried myself to sleep and I feel like shit I dont know what to do with out him as a friend and after last night I cant even look at him the same and I have a class with him next period. I need help, please. (link)
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well i dont know what to tell you.. it seems like things between you & this guy are going nowhere. he seems like a huge asshole, i mean, you told him you loved him & it doesnt even matter to him. the only thing you can do is move on.. & yes its gona be hard.. but it would be the best thing to do.. as for you & this girl.. she is just insecure about herself & by gettting the attention of this guy youre attracted to, she feels better about herself. you shouldnt think too much of it.. yeah getting over him will be hard.. but just fall back on the support of your friends & things wont hurt as much.
hope i helped.
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hello! i am 13. im having my second child (i had my first when i was 11, her name is Amy). For my first baby, i told my parents and they were so happy! They felt stupid because they are going to be GRANDparents at 26 but i told them its not a big deal! So when i had Amy, it was totally natural! I felt so good and proud. The two of us have been living at my parents house for 2 years now. The father of my Amy, is now the father of Tommy, my bun in the oven! ;) I love him so much and he loves me. My parents love him too. He doesnt have any parents really. Well he does, but he runs away and stays away for a really long time. He is 11 right now. I think he should come live with me, amy and tommy! i havent brought it up with my parents yet though.
i thought it was the coolest thing that amy and her dad were so close in age, because they would probably be really close. Amys 2 and she can talk really well. She LOVES her dad and me.
my problem is, will Amy feel left out? will tommy not like his daddy or me? tommy's due date is tomorrow so for moms out there, you kno that my stomach is rubbing agenst the keyboard right now. but it feels good, i love pregnancy!
anyway, me and my boyfriend are geting married in one year. im so excited!
so just please answer my questions. thank you. sorry for the lenght. oh, tommy says thank you as well (he just kicked. . .twice!). oh and amy says hi as well! ;)
thanks again, bye! (link)
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i hate to sound rude, but i hope this is a joke.
if not, the best to you and mark and amy and tommy. i cant say i know what pregnancy is like so i cant help you there, no i dont think amy will feel left out. just make sure not to neglect or ignore her.
but yes i think it would be a good idea to have mark living with you and the kids, a baby shouldnt grow up barely seeing his/her daddy. so how does marks parents feel about this. as for the playhouse idea. if its big enough, its a good plan. it gives you a little independence, but still you have the option of going to your parents if something happens
best of luck to you during your pregnancy
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I know I always ask questions on Advicenators about my boyfriend but that's because I like other people's opinions.
Anyways...last night we were talking about having sex. He asked me if we could. I have been thinking about it for awhile now, and I think I am ready. I have taken many tests that said I am ready and I have thought through everything. Last night before I gave him my answer we talked about it for awhile (yes, we have also talked about it before.) He said that he sees a future with us and that he doesn't want just sex, but it's his only real and true way he KNOWS how to show me he loves me. He was talking about when we get married and our kids and all of that. He's very sincere when he says it, I know. He says we will not break up. So I said yes, I would do it. I even talked to him about how my dad's always telling me a guy will tell you anything to get a little something and he assured me he wouldn't. He knows what kind of girl I am and that if he just wanted sex he could be somewhere else.
That's just a little background information so you know I have thought alot about this. I have a few questions that I have to ask though. (BTW, if it makes any difference he is wearing a condom AND pulling out)
1. If I am on bottom, what do I do?
2. What do you do after sex?
3. What does sex feel like?
4. How bad does it hurt?
Thanks soo much to anyone who answers, it means alot to me! I rate high! (link)
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dont have sex with him unless your sure. me and my boyfriend had sex not long after we started going out. and eventhough were still going out stronger then ever, it was my only regret in our relationship. once you do it, its hard to tell if he really wants YOU or YOUR BODY. and i realized it after we had sex. at that point, you basically have to "test" him and see if he really cares. generally, guys think if you've done it once with them its not a big deal to do it again. if you do chose to have sex with him, i suggest making him wait a while, at least a month, untill you do it again. just to prove he likes you for you.
yes your dad is right, but not all guys are like that. me and my boyfriend talk about our future, marrige, kids, and things like that all the time even after we've had sex. in a way i think it brought us closer together, not only on a physical level, but on a emotional level as well. but thats not the case for all couples, some couples actually feel more distant after sex.
i am guessing he is more experienced then you and may have had sex with other girls before you. if you dont know, dont hesitate to ask him. if you going to do this, his body becomes your business. also, if he feels this is the only way to show he cares, even if he talks sincerely about your future, something just not right. me and my guy can have our physical intimate moments, but he still knows how to show me he cares in other ways.
a little extra information.. some guys (not all)
-prefer an inexperienced girl, because it feels better for them if your tight
-prefer an inexperienced girl, because they teach you exactly what then want and how they want it
-just like the thought of taking away someones virginity and after that, leave her.
.. those are just some things you should think about before you go and do it.
remember, eventhough youve already said yes, if you have any doubt what-so-ever, even just a little bit, its okay to say no. and if he TRULY cares for you the way you say he does. he wont mind, he'll think that your worth the wait.
and to answer your questions.
usually its the top that does most everything. you just need to make sure your legs are spread wide enough (and by the way, if its your first time and your tight, chances are its going to take him a few tries to get it in)
what you do after sex depends on the couple. some couples do it again (but i HIGHLY doubt you'd want to do that after your first time) some couples just lay together and cuddle, some take showers together, some couples just grab their clothes put them on and feel really awkward.
after my first time having sex, i didnt want to do it again because it HURT beyond anything you could imagine, like i knew that it would hurt. but not that bad. i cried. and i almost made him take it out. after that i didnt even WANT to have sex again cause of the pain. but after 5 or 6 times it losend up and didnt hurt and started to feel good. but if you plan on doing it more then once with this guy, dont wait too too long. because then you get tight again and it hurts the same. and. i dont know if hes fingured you before, but sometimes that helps. starting with one finger then adding one trying to stretch it out. but thats his deal to worry about
good luck
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ok. me and my man have never made out with annyone before, and i was thinkin that that is something we might do preddy soon. what i need to know is, how? should i just like, get on top of him and shove my toung in his mouth or what? pleaze i need help i rate (link)
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kissing is supposed to be something that comes naturally that you just feel. it cant be something you plan out or stress about. its a symbol of caring and obviously some sort of attraction. but i would say that if you dont even know what to do, and you worry your doing it wrong, you shouldnt do it at all. i remember my first kiss was so awkward, but then i met the perfect guy and got to know him inside-out and now im so comfortable with him, im not afraid of looking stupid or messing up. but i agree with the other advice, DO NOT get on top of him and shove your tongue in his mouth.. my advice would be to just start with little pecks, lingering near his face, keeping close at all times, and then slyly slip in your tongue. but not too much, from there things will just move into making out. but be patient, it doesnt have to happen all at once. plus. if he's never made out with anyone before either, im sure hes not gona comment on your kissing style. just be comfortable with what your doing and dont feel like you HAVE to do it if your not ready, there are other ways to show you care for him.
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I keep cutting myslef and hurting myself because of the hurt that I feel. I feel alone in the world even though I know that I have my mom and I know that I have my family, but I don't have the love of my life with me and everytime that i think that he is with the other woman I cut myself or when I feel alone and desparate I hurt myself with the scirrors and I want to get away and I wan to cry all the time and I want to go far away and never return. I need help I don't know what to do anymore. I need to talk to someone and let all this out I need help someone help me please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sad and desparate (link)
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i know the situation your in personally, and i know how intimidating and terrible the thought of professional help is. but that would be the best thing for you. otherwise, its good to realize the things you DO have as oppose to the things you dont. count your blessings; you still have your mom and your family, which already makes you luckier then so many people.
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my friend hooked me up iwht a boy well lets cal him "d" "d" is 13 but in 5th grade (fail once and started school late cus he moved and yeah its a long story) im in 8th and 13. i like him alot. before we started going out. he used to come over here and hang out and when he asked my friend to ask me out and i said yes, thats when he found out i was in 8th. he seemd cool and every thing went along great. then it was time that he had to leave and he said "ill be here tomooro" and he never came back and its been a week and a half and i think hes intimidated cus im in 8th. i tyhink he thinks i dont like him cause of his grade. or he has somthing else going on. i dont have his # and dont have mine#. he lives in my neoghbor hood. but im not sure whihch house. what do you think, any suggestions? i rate! (link)
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although you both are the same age, the grade difference is a lot. but if he ask`d you out but now wont hang out with you when he says he will, maybe he isnt the best guy for you. i dont think that he`s nessicarily intimidated because your in 8th grade. but consider that you are almost in highschool and there are sooo many more guys and i think he might realize that and THAT may scare him. 3 grades is a big difference.. but if you really like him. talk to him, see how hes feeling. or if he has other things going on.
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There are 16 people (all girls) who I'm getting valentines day gifts. What should I get them? Don't make it too expensive.
(link)
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roses and chocolate are cute.. and girls love it
xoxo -- sara
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I have a good friend (Amy), who've been going out with my best guy friend (Jon) for awhile now. Me and Jon do a lot of things together, we're always hanging out. This leads to Amy being jealous of us. Now she's saying we're "together behind closed doors", otherwise, he's cheating on her with me. We both think she's totally crazy, because it's not true at all. She's being super controlling over him. He's not just going to stop hanging out with me, because we've been bestfriends since we were one. He doesn't know what to do, nither do I. He doesn't want to dump her, because he really loves her. But what should we both do to help her realize we're only friends and that's all we'll ever be? (link)
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you need to explain that you two have been friends ever since you can remember & that that`s all you are, friends. if she doesnt beleive you. maybe try yo include her in some of your plans to show her that there is nothing going on.
xO--sara
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Alright my friend is so happy with her boyfriend they have been together for 5 years and are getting engaged... well whenever i hang out with them i kind of get jealous and sad because the way they act.. i wanna be loved too.... and i love this one guy, not my friends boyfriend another guy. and he acts like he likes me I mean holding my hand kissing me... ect. But... it makes me want my guy even more when I am with my friend and her boyfriend... I miss him so much.. but I dont wanna make my friend mad what should I do?? (link)
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its difficult when you have a reely close friend with a long term boyfriend. you often feel like the third wheel and then assume her boyfriend has taken the place of her best friend. which makes you want to be loved and do cute things with a special guy like they do. first you should probably find out if this kid likes you. maybe i missed something.. but i dont reely understand why your friend would be mad.. but maybe the guy your into is shy and waiting for you to make the first move.
xO- sara
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My family has always had issues. I've tried to work at fixing them even though my family tells me constantly that its me, not them. We fight over how much work each other does around the house, we fight over who gets to watch what on TV, we fight about almost anything we can think of. I think that everyone in my family has little problems in their lives that they need to work on, but they all seem to think that it's my fault, when I believe all I'm trying to do is help get this family in line because no one else can. Could it all be my fault, or no? (link)
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i'm in a similar situation. everytime you have a fight with your family, it lowers your self esteem, and theirs too. that is what is making you question if it is you or not. it most definately isnt you though. i think maybe you and your family are a little preoccupied with things other then ur family lifes.. and this makes you confused and irritable. just try to avoid them as much as you can. or maybe talk to them about how much you hate fighting--
when theyre calm
xO- sara
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HEEEEEEEELP!!!!!PLEASE!!!!!
ok ok....i submitted a question about my bestfriend that i made out with and that i have gone out with a million times...blah blah blah well after i did that he asked my out on halloween and we ahve been going out for 3 months now...but i got kicked out of my private school and im goin back to public school w/him and he thinks that i will dump him now becuase i will just go out with sumone eles and the only reason i have been going out with him this long is becuase i didnt have anyone to go out w/ at my old school and he almost started crying...i told him he was CRAZII and that i love him more than anything...but i dont rele trust myself i mean i know i love him but... i have already talked to a few of my ex boyfriends and i already know that i am gunna have to fiight to b able to turn them down becuase one of them already asked me to...does that mean i dont love my boyfriend???? (link)
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no one other then you knos if you truly love your boyfriend. not matter how much information about any situation you give. i do think you care for him a lot, but are just very confused right now. maybe take some time away from guys to clear your head and realize what it is you want.
xO- sara
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Okay, I need some advice, and this might be pretty long because of all the explaining I have to do about this... but anyways, at the beginning of the school year I changed schools. I started liking this guy in my Biology class. I didn't know his name because I had only been there three or four days. Then one day one of my new friends told me his friend liked me. I was all like "Okay, whatever." Well, about a few weeks later, I realized the guy that liked me was the guy I liked. The guy & I weren't really friends, and we only had a short conversation probably twice, but yet I always caught him looking at me or something and he would always stand by me if we were waiting outside the classroom for the teacher. Well, now we're in a new semester and we have History together. We've talked a few more times but not much. And I also overheard my friend talking to him about me and telling him I don't have a boyfriend and he should go out with me (but she doesn't know I like him.) I also still catch him looking at me, but he hangs around with this other girl that he seems to like. Like today, for instance, he would look at me alot during the first half of the period, then the second half he went over and sat beside the other girl and was talking to her. And I'm not really the kind of girl that will tell a guy I like him up front or anything. But I'm really confused by this - does he like me, or not? Some advice/help would be appreciated. =) Thanks. Oh, by the way, I'm 15 years old & female. (link)
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he probably does have a thing for you. but that doesnt mean he cant be interested in other girls. talk to him more if you can, hang out with him outside of the class room, flirt a little, maybe he will get the hint and admit to liking you so you wont have to first.
xO- sara
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ok so i'm 14 and haven't been on a real date...or been kissed. i'm starting to think that something is wrong with me. what should I do? (link)
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there is nothing wrong with you. not every one gets kissed at the same age. just as some people get their periods before others. dont try to force it. you want your first kiss to be something special. dont waste it on someone you dont reely like just cause you want to be able to say you have been kissed. it happens totally unplanned and when you least expect it. dont rush. wait for it to feel right
xO- sara
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Over the weekend I did a really stupid thing. Ive been best friends with this guy for about 5 years now and nothing has every happened romantically between us. It crossed my mind a few times but nothin ever came of it. Anyways over the weekend we slept together. he has a girlfriend and i feel really bad. i never really had feelings for him but now i do and he told his girlfriend about it and he wants to try to stay with her. We havent really talked about why it happened and whether we have feelings for each other or not. I want to talk to him about it but i want to bring it up without looking like im clingy and all "where is this going" kind of annoying.
I really dont know what to do. Any advice would help. Thanks (link)
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try going about it like " i kno we have been close friends for a long time.. but.. " and then just tell him how u feel.. maybe like. o about what happend the other night well -- and fill in your feelings. i cant tell you what to say. i can only guide you
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I started cutting my self about a year, and I just did it to see what it felt like and to maybe finally get some attention from my mom and now I cant stop... its like after every little argument I have with her I have to go up to my room and cut my self or it doesn’t feel right. I have tried to stop and I have even made promise to people but I just don’t know what to do any more it seems like its getting out of control and I don’t want to have to go see a therapist because I don’t know if I could come out and say I have a problem so basically I’m just asking what I should do...? (link)
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i know how your feeling. i've made promises and tried to stop. but it is just like something you HAVE to do. i understand. but what you need to understand is that u need help. i didnt want to see it at first-- but then i realized i need help and then from there the situation has been lookn up. not to say its perfect. i have my ups and downs.. but just realizing you need help solving something bigger then you could imagine is the first step. i have a friend who i kno i would die w/o.. he's like my gaurdian angel i guess you could say. you need someone like that to talk you through tough situations and make you feel good about yourself. + you could keep a diary, poem book, or draw what your feeling instead of cutting it. those are the only solutions i can come up with if you dont want to see a therapist. but maybe you can do what i did and just talk to a professional. a person you can tell it all to who wont go blabbing it around the school or w/e the case may be. best of luck
xO-sara
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my friend wants to get extentions.. how do i tell her that uhm.. no. (link)
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ha well ur a loser. shes a loser. i'm a loser :) so weeeee what more do we need to kno?? lol i`ll tell her i`ll b like uh dude-- extentions. no. never!
*note these r my friends i wouldnt answer a real question like this..
xO-sara
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Aight well i have this friend and she used to like this guy named jeff. Well jeff asked her out but recently just told her he liked me more and bragged about me and soo forth. Well she said no and broke jeff's heart. Well now jeff is madly in love with me and he wants to go out with me. And now my friend is starting to like jeff a little more also. I really want to go out with jeff, but is it okay that i go out with someone my best friend has previsouly liked i don't know but i really want jeff.... But again i don't want to end our relationship...
Sincerely,
Loved friend (link)
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of course a friendship is important. but i was in the same type of situation. except i kissed the guy when my friend was madly head over heals in love with him.. well. me and my friend decided a guy wasnt worth ending our friendship over. you just need to think about who is more important. or hey try getting the best of both worlds. try explaining that you reely like jeff and he likes you too. and that your friend rejected HIM so it wouldnt completely be your fault for falling for him. or better yet. get her blessing to go for it with him. if she is a true fried she will see how much you like him and maybe back off..
xO-sara
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lately ive been getting annoyed at my friends. They are great friends but sometimes..they get on my nerves. Like within our circle we have like 3 ppl who gossip..and i hate it. Then we have a couple people who never contribute in driving us anywhere..and its always me and a couple others driving. Its these little things that have been accumulating and now im getting angry. I feel like i want to find a new circle ..and my other friend agrees...she wants to also. But reality is..there isnt another circle and we do have good friends..what should i do? is this normal? (link)
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i cant say if its a normal thing to do or not. but i can say i do it too. sometimes i get so fed up with my friends that anything-- even just writing someone a note-- gets on my nerves and i turn it into a big thing. its stupid i kno.. and i dont reely kno if thers nething u can do about it. u dont necessarily have to find new friends. but you should take some time away from your friends you have now.
xO-sara
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okay i have a problem, but its not mine, its my friends. my friend has been talking to this person on AOL instant messanger for about a week. let's call my friend Bob and let's call who he's been talking to Mary (not real names) Bob is one of my BEST friends in the whole world. he tells me that Mary and him are really getting along and that she always says how she loves him, even though they've only been talking for a week. he isnt sure if he's scared of her or anything, but he told me that he thinks she's sort of like a stalker and you know stuff like that. theres two ways he can go about letting her go:
1) just telling her to stop being so obessive
2) be a jerk and maybe she'll stop liking him
he doesnt want to do #1 because it would most likely hurt her a lot. but i dont think he should do #2 because thats dishonest and mean. please help!!! what should he do?
thanks so much!! and if you have anyother questions, ask me and i'll give you my email (link)
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well either way is sorta a bad way to go about it.. but if you think about it. theyve known eachother for like a week so letting her go shouldnt hurt her so much.. + if shes reely so obsessive. its worth it.
xO-sara
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