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First time...scared...
I know I always ask questions on Advicenators about my boyfriend but that's because I like other people's opinions.
Anyways...last night we were talking about having sex. He asked me if we could. I have been thinking about it for awhile now, and I think I am ready. I have taken many tests that said I am ready and I have thought through everything. Last night before I gave him my answer we talked about it for awhile (yes, we have also talked about it before.) He said that he sees a future with us and that he doesn't want just sex, but it's his only real and true way he KNOWS how to show me he loves me. He was talking about when we get married and our kids and all of that. He's very sincere when he says it, I know. He says we will not break up. So I said yes, I would do it. I even talked to him about how my dad's always telling me a guy will tell you anything to get a little something and he assured me he wouldn't. He knows what kind of girl I am and that if he just wanted sex he could be somewhere else.
That's just a little background information so you know I have thought alot about this. I have a few questions that I have to ask though. (BTW, if it makes any difference he is wearing a condom AND pulling out)
1. If I am on bottom, what do I do?
2. What do you do after sex?
3. What does sex feel like?
4. How bad does it hurt?
Thanks soo much to anyone who answers, it means alot to me! I rate high!
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Hm...if he told you it is the only way he KNOWS how to show his love for you..it may be exactly what your dad is saying...or he just has to much intimacy for you and doesn't know how to express himself.
If you are on bottom do whatever comes to mind. Wrapping your legs up around waist, and of just laying them ontop of the back of his shins will open you more. Allowing him to go deeper as well as more pleasure instead of pain for you.
What do you do after sex...if you have to ask this question maybe you aren't as comfortable around him as you thought...be yourself...tell him what you thought about it...what you guys can change in the furture...talk about it.
What does it feel like...the first time it hurts, but after a few minutes it begins to feel great. It is like this pleasure that keeps building up and up and up...until you're release. Which, on the first time...girls don't always have, so you may experience your clit to hurt, which just means you are aroused and havn't be able to release anything, the best way to do that is for him or you to rub it gentally, and or until you orgasm. Or, you feel the pain subside.
How bad does it hurt. My boyfriend had to try 4 different times to penetrate me, because I'm a baby when it comes to pain...but what I learned it open yourself. Spread your legs, let him go deeper and you'll loosen to his fit faster, and it will be pleasurable.
*WovenLynx*
Hope I helped.
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dont have sex with him unless your sure. me and my boyfriend had sex not long after we started going out. and eventhough were still going out stronger then ever, it was my only regret in our relationship. once you do it, its hard to tell if he really wants YOU or YOUR BODY. and i realized it after we had sex. at that point, you basically have to "test" him and see if he really cares. generally, guys think if you've done it once with them its not a big deal to do it again. if you do chose to have sex with him, i suggest making him wait a while, at least a month, untill you do it again. just to prove he likes you for you.
yes your dad is right, but not all guys are like that. me and my boyfriend talk about our future, marrige, kids, and things like that all the time even after we've had sex. in a way i think it brought us closer together, not only on a physical level, but on a emotional level as well. but thats not the case for all couples, some couples actually feel more distant after sex.
i am guessing he is more experienced then you and may have had sex with other girls before you. if you dont know, dont hesitate to ask him. if you going to do this, his body becomes your business. also, if he feels this is the only way to show he cares, even if he talks sincerely about your future, something just not right. me and my guy can have our physical intimate moments, but he still knows how to show me he cares in other ways.
a little extra information.. some guys (not all)
-prefer an inexperienced girl, because it feels better for them if your tight
-prefer an inexperienced girl, because they teach you exactly what then want and how they want it
-just like the thought of taking away someones virginity and after that, leave her.
.. those are just some things you should think about before you go and do it.
remember, eventhough youve already said yes, if you have any doubt what-so-ever, even just a little bit, its okay to say no. and if he TRULY cares for you the way you say he does. he wont mind, he'll think that your worth the wait.
and to answer your questions.
usually its the top that does most everything. you just need to make sure your legs are spread wide enough (and by the way, if its your first time and your tight, chances are its going to take him a few tries to get it in)
what you do after sex depends on the couple. some couples do it again (but i HIGHLY doubt you'd want to do that after your first time) some couples just lay together and cuddle, some take showers together, some couples just grab their clothes put them on and feel really awkward.
after my first time having sex, i didnt want to do it again because it HURT beyond anything you could imagine, like i knew that it would hurt. but not that bad. i cried. and i almost made him take it out. after that i didnt even WANT to have sex again cause of the pain. but after 5 or 6 times it losend up and didnt hurt and started to feel good. but if you plan on doing it more then once with this guy, dont wait too too long. because then you get tight again and it hurts the same. and. i dont know if hes fingured you before, but sometimes that helps. starting with one finger then adding one trying to stretch it out. but thats his deal to worry about
good luck
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Well. It really all depends on if you like babies or not. If you answer is yes, then go ahead. If you answer is no, then dont.
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