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I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
*happy
*employed
*married
*large extended family
*bisexual
*advanced college degree
*no kids (yet)
advice
He's hot, what is his name?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofwFr8o8p0Y
I searched for awhile and came up with nothing. It's surprisingly difficult to find the answers to these types of questions. I tried for years to figure out who's picture was on the cover of one of my favorite band's albums and was only able to get the answer recently. Having been through that, I have some advice for you. I got my information from a fan forum. Someone had posted about it and the answer was right there. Your problem could be that the Brown Eyed Girls are not from an English speaking country so the forums could be mostly in a different language. My suggestion would be to go to the forum and ask your question there. There's gotta be a few super fans who know the answer!
http://kpopselca.com/forum/korean-artists/official-brown-eyed-girls-thread-t278/
Which do you think is weirder ? A close guy friend that cuts and files my nails and toes nails or a close guy cousin that cuts and files my finger and toe nails ? Or are they both weird ?
Yeah it is weird. Especially since they're both doing it independent of each other. Did you ask them to do it at one point or something? By definition, "weird" means that it's uncommon. I can't imagine that a large percentage of people do this sort of thing. I doubt most guys file their own nails, let alone someone else's. A lot of people don't like feet and wouldn't want to be that close to someone else's feet. It's quite an intimate thing for them to be doing for you. This is not to say that there's anything wrong with something that's weird. It's just not something that you see most people doing. If it makes you feel any better, I actually cut my husband's toenails from time to time because he does a really bad job on them himself and I don't want to look at that. I can't imagine doing it for anyone else, but your situation is not completely odd to me personally. Many people tie the word "weird" in with other words like creepy, gross, or unnatural. They shouldn't do that and you shouldn't either. Some people, rather than thinking that feet are gross, really like feet. Is that weird? Yes, but you're never alone in your weirdness and who would enjoy a world where everyone was exactly the same? Just because something is weird doesn't mean it's wrong.
To me a student is like cup when the cup is full the person is no longer a student but a master of what ever it is they study. What word best fits someone that is like an infinatley large cup?
I like Pol0's answer. If you're looking for a particular term, "Renaissance man" and "polymath" are the two closest that I could think of to what you described.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Renaissance_Man
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polymath
Is boredom an emotion, or just the default state you're in when your mind isn't busy with anything?
It's whatever you want it to be. From one person to the next, we experience and understand things differently. Here's an example: think about the color red. How do you know it's red? Is it possible that I see red as your yellow? Your own perception is your only reality. There is no actual reality outside of your self because you can only experience life through yourself. To answer your question specifically, both of the things that you described could be considered boredom. It doesn't have to be one or the other. Most words have many meanings and different ways of using them. Personally, I understand boredom as having a negative connotation so I would say that it's more of an emotion than the mind not being busy. Sometimes it's nice when your brain isn't busy. :)
So, a few days ago I adopted a cat.
I'm a college student and I'm paying my way through school so I don't have a lot of money. I have a enough to take care of the cat though.
But yesterday I found out my apartment asks for a $400 dollar pet deposit which I cannot afford right now. I
After school I only have about $500 a month for groceries and things.
So far, I haven't told my apartment I adopted a cat. What do you think is the worst they would do if they eventually found out? Just ask I pay it?
Should I tell them and try to work out a payment plan or something. I'm just worried they'll want all the money up front and I have no way to do that. I would be devastated if I had to give her up.
I'm just looking for advice on the smartest actions.
They could actually kick you out. You are breaking the contract that you made with them. I'm not just trying to scare you, they could really do this. They have every right to put you on the street and they might be able to keep your original security deposit too. My guess is that they're not going to do that, they're just going to demand the extra money and threaten to evict you. The smartest, most responsible action here would be to return the cat. You can't afford it. You adopted it a few days ago. I know that a few days is long enough to start to really like an animal, but you're not going to be that devastated. If you want to risk it, you could keep the cat secretly and then pay the deposit in a few months once you've saved up enough money. If you're going to do this, though, you'll have to really sneak around. It's going to be rough. Would your parents or a friend look after it for a few months so that you didn't have to return it and you wouldn't be risking keeping it in the apartment? That's probably the best route. Did you read your rental agreement before you signed it? You may want to read through it again. It may say what will happen if you have an unauthorized pet. If you don't have it anymore, you can probably get a copy from your landlord or the apartment's office. I wish you the best of luck. You have to remember that you are the one that made a mistake here. You put yourself in an awkward position and you're going to have to be the one to decide what you want to risk. The right thing to do would be to return the cat, the smartest thing to do would be to have someone else look after it until you can pay the deposit, and the riskiest, irresponsible thing to do would be to hope nobody notices. If no one notices for awhile you may think you're in the clear and you're going to stop saving money for the deposit. That is absolutely the wrong thing to do. You don't want trouble. The next place you stay will want references and you don't want a bad record. You most certainly don't want to get evicted. Until you pay the deposit, the cat shouldn't stay there.
So, this goes back to when I was like 16 or 17 and I got my first debit card. It was a simple little check card where I could put my money in... the little money that I had lol. Well, I remember going on this trip back in high school and when I got back and checked my bank account, I saw -$600 something dollars. That is NEGATIVE SIX HUNDRED SOMETHING DOLLARS. I was freaking out. Plus, I didn't even have a credit card or credit or anything like that. I was still in high school and wasn't even 18 yet, so I couldn't apply for a credit card. I thought this would affect me when I did want to apply for one, which wasn't so far away. I asked her what had happened? Why had my account been overdrawn?! I never even used that card. It was like a savings account. She replied, "How did you think we were going to go on that trip?" As far as I've heard, that's never been taken care of. When I was 18, and had just started college, I opened up a new account at what was Wachovia at the time (Wells Fargo). They mentioned that they did a search on me and that something came up about my old bank (bank of america). I said I didn't know what they were talking about because my mom said that they would take care of it. I asked my mom about it after and she's like "don't worry about it." So, I didn't worry about it.
The prom dress story is another one. I had gotten this dress for my winter prom back in high school. Actually, my mom had gotten it for me. Then, I started to get these phone calls saying that I had given a check that bounced back and I was going to get arrested. I had detectives calling me and the store calling me saying that they were sending the police. I didn't know what they were talking about. I was scared. Then, I found out that my mom wrote a check in my name! And no one ever even bothered to CARD HER?! I was 17 at the time... so, I was a minor, I don't even know if that's legal. So, finally, they found out the culprit and she took care of it. She just had to go to this one day class... kind of like traffic school but for finances.
About a year later, I got my very own credit card that was for a students. So, it didn't have that big of a limit. Maybe like $800. I totally forgot about the old bank thing. I figured it was taken care of since my credit was approved. Then, I opened up credit cards at different department stores so that I could build credit. I never used them. I just activated them and that's it. But, I don't like to use them because their CREDIT CARDS. Soon, I see my mom rushing to get statements in and really worried. What happened? It turns out she used my macy's credit card and victoria's secret and started buying things like crazy. She was using my main credit card too. Then, I tried opening accounts and I was getting denied. I was really worried, because I this point, I wasn't even 20 yet and she was ruining my credit. I asked her why my credit card with a limit of $800 had been maxed out? The only thing I had ever used it for was to pay for gas, because I didn't have enough money on me and I really needed gas. Those are the kind of emergencies you use a credit card for. Then she mentioned that another time we went somewhere, she had used my credit card to pay for tickets to a theme park.
At the time, I wasn't working. My mom had volunteered to pay for my credit cards. The reason why is because I am very responsible and never used them. I only had them to build credit. I only agreed to get my own credit card in the first place for emergencies. She knows that I would never spend money on the credit card because I'd be too scared lol. Then, she couldn't pay for the credit card on time or enough, and they lowered my limit. I'm getting declined on everything. They took away the Macy's credit card... AND I'M NOT EVEN BUYING THINGS!
Now, I'm graduating from college and marriage is around the corner. How am I going to fix all of this?! The only credit that I'VE ever used is my credit card TWICE IN THE PAST FOUR YEARS to pay for gas. And the only loan I've ever taken out was for school. I don't want my mom to go to jail. She's been through a lot and lost her job and I guess she thought that was her life line. She made a mistake but she's only human and she loves me. Now, I'm working part time and starting my career in 90 days! I already have a job waiting for me when I graduate. But, this is really serious. We're talking about thousands of dollars here... dating back to high school. What can I do?
You MUST hold your mom responsible for this. It's unlikely that she'll have to go to jail. There are a few reasons that you have to do this. The number one reason is because she needs help. She needs serious help and she's not going to get it if you keep facilitating her addiction and behavior. It's so unfortunate, but at this point you have to think of it as if you've reversed roles. You need to act like the adult parent here because she is acting like a child. No parent should do this to their child no matter what the financial circumstances are. Do not ever make excuses for her like "it must have been her life line". No. She has a serious addiction and it has to be treated as such. You have to do the hard thing here and hold her responsible so that she can get help. It's in her best interest as well as yours. If you ignore what she's done and believe that she won't do it again, you'll have problems for the rest of your life. The other thing you need to do is protect yourself. How is she getting your cards/accounts? Make sure that she can't. Change your social security number if you have to. Speak to a professional to see what needs to be done to protect your identity from her. Keep everything under lock and key. Again, you have to treat this like it's a drug addiction. My advice to you is to talk to a lawyer. Tell the lawyer what's going on and find out what you can do. The lawyer will work with you to clean up your name, make sure that your mom doesn't go to jail, and try to get your mom the major help that she needs so she can live a happy, healthy life. I wish you the best of luck and even though it's going to be hard, a lot of the time in life, the hardest thing to do is also the RIGHT thing to do. You may have to see your mom suffering, but wouldn't that be okay if in the end she could be content within herself? I'm sure she doesn't want to be screwing up your life and whatever inner problems she has, you can help her to heal.
Hi,
I want to do something like Jay Walking, and then throw it on youtube? Like go on the streets, ask people questions, and record the stupid answers.
I know the process of recording, and I'm sure I'll be able to find out how to edit videos after a few hours of googling, but how much should I be worried about the legal aspect? I know hidden camera TV shows have to make the people sign waivers to give their permission to use it, but where does someone find a copy of that?
Or what should I do? I don't want to get sued, but I think this would be pretty hilarious?
Any advice would be great! Thanks :)
Sounds like fun! My suggestion would be to blank out people's faces.
I do not believe that you would have a problem as long as you are recording in public places and as long as you are not making money. There is no reasonable expectation of privacy in a public place. I believe that the waivers mostly exist because there's money involved. If I'm the star of a show, I may feel entitled to some of the proceeds from the show, but the waiver would say that I'm not going to get paid for my performance.
It would be best if you made everyone aware that they're being recorded rather than doing it secretly. Many people enjoy being on camera. Instead of a waiver, when you approach someone, after introducing yourself and whatnot, just quickly ask them if it's okay that you're filming them and catch their response on film. You can edit it out of your video, but you'd have their permission on file as long as you didn't save the edited video over the original.
To protect yourself, try not to film anyone under the age of 18. If you're still nervous, you can sometimes get free legal advice online (just not on here). The laws probably differ by state.
Hi, 20/m
I'm a small town boy, soon to be moving to a big city. I'm trying to look for a room in an apartment, and have been looking on craigslist.
I've never done this sort of thing before, and so I'm a bit confused.
Some of the pictures look like they've been taken off a website i.e. they look like billionaire penthouses. Are these scams? Is there any damage in contacting them?
Also, any other tips you could give me when searching for a place on craigslist? I.e. what to look for, what to avoid, how to tell if its fake/a scam?
Any help is much appreciated!
Thanks
I agree with Braiden, craigslist is not the way to go. There is a potential for getting caught up in a scam if you use craigslist. Many people do not trust it and while you will see lots of ads on there and some of them may be legit, those same people will advertize their apartments in other places too. You're much more likely to get involved in a scam on craigslist than you are with an ad in the newspaper or other website like http://www.rentals.com/. No one in their right mind would only advertize their apartment on craigslist and many people do not use craigslist because they do not find it reputable, so you'd be missing out on some opportunities. A local newspaper is the number one place to find a good apartment. A lot of newspapers have websites with a place where you can interactively search for an apartment. Find out the name of a big newspaper in the area where you're going and you should be able to find the website for that newspaper. Other than that, I'd go with rentals.com or another site other than craigslist. Craigslist just can't be trusted with something important like getting an apartment when you can find one another way.
im 16/f looking foward to getting my bellybutton pierced. but in the past dont know why i did this dont judge loll but when i was kinda insecure i waxed on my stomache because i thought the hair was gonna get thinner and lighter by doing so, but the opposite happened so i had to wax it a few more times.its just darker and thicker.dont get me wrong its not like anything or anywhere near like shaving hair. but it does bother me because in general i just hate having hair there. ive tried using hydrogen peroxide which did absolutley nothing. i need something that is going to make it lighter and thinner or go away forever. so advice! thanksss
You can get a cream or similar product that will bleach body hair, making it less visible. My college roommate used it and it worked really well for her. I can't remember what brand it was, but I'm sure they're all pretty similar. Just browse through the hair products aisle and see what you can find. Good luck!
Here's an example:
http://compare.ebay.com/like/330651191771?var=lv<yp=AllFixedPriceItemTypes&var=sbar
whats the rapture coming? i dont get it
With all the studying that Mr. Camping has done of the Bible, it humors me that he seems to have completely missed/ignored this passage:
Matthew 24:36-39
But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, but My Father only. But as the days of Noah were, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. For as in the days before the flood, they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered the ark, and did not know until the flood came and took them all away, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be.
Anyone that predicts the rapture is either greedy for money and attention or is actually crazy. Do not believe their crap!
My ex-girlfriend and I go to different colleges and were long distance for awhile because of it. We're no longer together but are on good terms and are pretty good friends, and she just revealed to me that sometimes (even while we were together), when she would sit down for class she would knowingly let her thongs ride up for random guys.
I'm not asking how I should feel about that (I don't really care), but I was just curious what you guys would think of it.
I don't know her so I can't make assumptions to her personality, but since you don't really care about this and you're still friends with her, my guess is that she's not an all out attention-whore or psychotic in any way. My thoughts are that she did/does this because she likes to feel sexy. Who doesn't? It's human nature for people to be unsure of their looks and wonder if other people think they're good-looking. It feels really good to know that others find you attractive and showing a little thong is a healthy way to discover that. Unlike psychotic sluts, she doesn't need to sleep around to feel this satisfaction. There's nothing wrong with being sexy in college and she's going about it in a very responsible, mature way. She'll probably grow out of it when she starts to feel more confident in herself, but for now, it's not really a big deal. If she's still doing this when she's 40, then there's a problem :)
this is kind of a weird question but I was wondering if anyone knows of a movie with a really good sex scene in it. Not a porn movie or anything like that, just a regular movie with a pretty steamy sex scene like the note book or something. Thanks!
Vanilla Sky
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vanilla_sky
18/f; ok, i've been a waitress at a family-owned BBQ restaurant for almost two years. i love my job. the bosses are laid back. the people are pretty nice. it easy to do. and i think alot of that comes from the fact that its not a chain restuarant so theres not as many like standards from the state or whatever. i dont know. but anyway. business is soo slow, and we're overstaffed and because im in school, i cant work mornings which is when they're busiest. so i only get two nights a week. MAYBE three if im very lucky because someone calls in or something. and very rarely are we steady/busy at night. its pitiful. i dont want to quit, but im broke. i got an application from a bigger Steakhouse [Outback] in a more high class, busier town. i've been contemplating taking it back. im more scared of getting the job than of not getting it. im afraid that i'll go and hate it, or suck at it and not catch on because they have such a bigger menu and a bar and everything. im afraid i'll want my job now back but i wont be able to get it back because if i quit, they wont be overstaffed anymore they'll have just enough. idk, i just dont wanna start at a new place and hate it, or make even less money, or whatever. any input? what would you do in this situation? i wish my job would just be busier, then i wouldnt even question quitting. my bosses like me alot and said that when i go off to college, i can work on weekends or breaks when i come home to make some extra cash, which is a great offer. should i give up a good thing for the possibility of more money, or just stick it out until i leave for college in the fall?
Ok, so you know that working at the Outback is better for you. However, it is sometimes worth earning a little less money to be happy.
Sometimes you have to take risks. It's not like you're going to be working in restaurants for the rest of your life...or even 5 years from now, hopefully. Your job at the BBQ restaurant is not something you would be doing for much longer anyway. I am going to give you the advice that you should apply at the Outback. You should do something first though.
Eat there. Twice. Once in the evening, and once during the afternoon. You work at a restaurant now. You'll get a very good sense of what the work atmosphere is like just by eating there a few times. Trust yourself and trust your instincts in this. You'll know if it's a bad place to work. Check out the staff. See if they seem like they're happy. While you're there, ask your waiter or waitress about it. Just a quick, simple "Is this a good place to work" or "What's it like working here" is enough. If it's not that great, they'll either tell you, or you will be able to pick up on it.
Overall, this is a good opportunity for you. You should take it. You'll be able to handle the new job. You have plenty of experience and everyone has a little trouble at first. Pretty soon though, you'll become very comfortable in a new job and you'll appreciate the extra cash. If everything fails miserably with your new job at the Outback, it seems like your old job will probably still be there for you. Good luck! :)
hi well this is about me & my boyfriend.. we both have trust issues..but weve been dating 7 months so we trust each other with everything..but im very paranoid bout him going thru my phone..bc, well my parents split up & now my mom & i are dirt poor, & i cant afford my phone. so, im REALLLY not proud of this, but i send this guy..pictures..& he pays my bills. so he text me last night saying "hey sunshine" & my bf saw it..& he kept asking who that text was from & i was drunk so i said idk then i deleted it. & then he saw i deleted it..& now he says he doesnt trust me anymore bc of me not telling him (he doesnt know about the pics..) & i feel so hurt bc he doesnt trust me anymore (but i would feel the same if the roles were reversed) but i dont have any money and i dont consider it cheating bc idk this person, theyre on another coast, & i have NO feelings for him. but it kills me inside whenever i do it & i want to regain my bfs trust but i just dont know what to do..about any of it..please help??
I want you to do something for me. Take a look at this website and try using your phone number in some of the searches it mentions. http://ezinearticles.com/?Reverse-Phone-Numbers:-How-To-Find-Free-Reverse-Phone-Numbers&id=472938. If you can find your own address, or one of the sites says it knows your address and requires you to pay to reveal it, this man can EASILY find you. If not, check out what the article says about private detectives. How easy is that? Phones can be tracked. They put out a signal and use towers to make their calls. If you watch crime shows, you would know that when someone makes a call with a cell phone, the call can be tracked almost to an exact location. Anyone can find out anything if they have enough resources and enough desire. Information is everywhere. If you'd done your own research you would know you are not safe just like the rest of us know it. If this man wants to find you he WILL. It's clear that everyone on this website is concerned with your safety. You came here looking for advice and when you are given it, you choose not to believe it. Get a grip and listen up to what so many people are saying. How can you disagree with us all? You need to start listening to some sense. How can you trust your own judgment after what you've already done? YOU ARE NOT SAFE and you need to do something to change that immediately. Bad things happen to people and you've put yourself in a really precarious situation.
You are really naive if you think he can't find you. Phones can be tracked.
You know what, unlike what another columnist suggested you do not need a cell phone. End of story. You can't tell me that you are that materialistic and so reliant on a luxury piece of technology. What would life be like if you didn't have a phone? Honestly, it would be fine. Now, yes, it's a great idea to find a way to make money to pay for your phone. That shows that you're responsible and hard working. However, are you serious? Is this really the only possible way you could think of to make money? Get a job! Mow people's lawns for crying out loud. I hope you realize how dangerous it is for you to be sending these pictures to this man. You must have given him some kind of information about yourself in order for him to get the money to you. BAD MOVE. If he doesn't already know, he could easily figure out where you live. You are in this too deep now to just quit what you are doing. You need to confide in an adult. If not your mom, a counselor at your school. You need to make sure that you are going to be safe if you all of a sudden just tell this guy that he's not going to get any more pictures. Which you need to do. I'm not even advising you on this one, I'm telling you. I'm being completely honest here, I don't think that you are safe. If he has your phone number he can find you. That is why it is especially important to let an adult know and let them help you with this. Now, about the boyfriend, if you stay with him you will have to tell him eventually. I agree with you in that I don't consider it cheating. It's still pretty bad though and something he should know about just the same if you end up marrying him and stuff. That's pretty far down the road and lets be honest here, anything could happen between now and then so don't bring this up just yet. He may not be mature enough to understand yet. If you're still together in your early to middle twenties, that would be the time to let him know. The text, why not just tell him it was a wrong number? That's pretty understandable. It happens all the time to me, that's for sure. Overall, you have some crucial decisions to make here. You can either continue living a life of prostitution and lies, or you can get off your butt, go out and earn your money how everybody else earns it. If you don't pick the second choice, sorry, but you are going to be poor for the rest of your life and you're going to look back to this moment and wish you had made the right decision. Please get help. You may think that nothing bad could happen to you, but you are wrong. Don't put it off either. End this today.
whenever im with a guy, i always shave right before i go and hang out with them because you never know if your going to get touchy feely with eachother.
the thing is, i dont know if its my razors or what, but i never ever get a good shave.
people have said to shave the way your hair grows, not agaisnt, and ive tried every way possible to shave. but its still always prickly.
can someone please tell me how to get a smooth clean shave. ive been shaving for as long as i can remember, and ive never been satisfied with how it turns out, and i get self conscious when my guy feels down there.
thank you~
Try using hair conditioner instead of shaving cream. Seriously! Sometimes it works much better. Make sure that you are using a sharp razor and try pushing down a little harder too. Good luck. :)
Do you guys think its weird for 16 year olds to go trick-or-treating? I dont do it to steal candy from little kids, I do it because I am a kid at heart lol and its fun! PLUS ITS FREE CANDY! But some people give me weird looks when I knock on their door and say "Trick-Or-Treat!" I guess its because I look like I'm about 20. Several houses last year gave me just one piece. But I dunno if they did that to everyone or JUST me. So my question is this: Do you think there should be an age limit to trick-or-treating? Why or Why not?
Eh, by that age you really should leave it to the kiddies. That doesn't mean that you can't go to family member's houses or see friends. By age 16, you usually start going to Halloween parties instead of trick-or-treating. My last year was when I was 15 or 16, but that's because I was forced to go with my little sister who is 3 years younger than me. It got kind of awkward though and I wish I had stopped sooner. I now have memories of trick-or-treating being weird and people giving me dirty looks instead of just pure bliss. The only way you should be going trick-or-treating now is if you have a younger sibling, you go with a little kid, or you go with an exchange student that wants the experience. Yeah, it's fun, but you really need to move on. Good luck and I'm sorry if that's not what you wanted to hear.
i have seen my friends go on a web page to check each others stats? and to see how many hours played and stuff. what page is it?
It's Bungie!
http://www.bungie.net
http://login.live.com/login.srf?wa=wsignin1.0&rpsnv=10&ct=1193681457&rver=4.5.2130.0&wp=LBI&wreply=http:%2F%2Fwww.bungie.net&lc=1033&id=42917
It's free, but you have to register for it. Just use the e-mail address you used for your gamertag and it'll upload all of your stats in what's called a "Service Record". It does a lot more than just let you check people's stats too. I'm on it allll the time. :)
Okay. How can I fix this?
About half a year ago, I bleached parts of my hair and dyed them unnatural colors. Then after dying them every month to a different color, I dyed everything a medium brown.
And then I didn't really like it so I went for something darker.
However, the middle of my hair all around is still that medium brown. That area will not take any more color.
Any products you recommend? D:
I don't think this is something you can take care of yourself. Make an appointment with a hair stylist and chill out with the dye! Your hair can only take so much. Hair is actually really fragile. Good luck. :)
My boyfriend that I've been dating for a couple of months dips. He used to do it A LOT more than he does now and he says he's trying to stop (NOT for me, for him), but I don't see much progress.
I was doing some research and it says that one can of dip has the nicotine of 60 cigarettes, so I can only imagine how hard it is for him to quit. It doesn't bother me as much as it did in the beginning, but there's just one thing that I constantly think about.
I know there are horror stories for cigarettes, alcohol...all that after school special stuff...and I'm not a "goody-goody" by any means, but seeing videos and pictures and hearing stories about people developing mouth cancer or even getting parts of their jaw removed scares me to death. He's only 18 and he's been doing it for two years.
Here's my question: How can I help him quit? Every time I bring it up I feel like I'm nagging him. How can I just help him along in a subtle way that will actually work without sounding like a nag?
Yeah I know, I misread the question and you're not allowed to delete your answers anymore. I don't have the time to fix it right now, but I will later. Sorry about that! :)
Ok, now that I've learned how to read I'll give you a better answer. :)
I know what dip is, I'm not an idiot. What happened was, I thought that he was under 18, which would make it quite illegal. It's not THAT bad of a thing, but still illegal and at that age completely unacceptable. Turning him in would be a little extreme, but still would have been the best thing for him. That said, he's been doing it for 2 years so even if it isn't illegal anymore, he has been participating in illegal activity. That's a bad sign. He's legally an adult now, but he's still young and the fact that he's pretty deep into this is going to make it extremely hard for him to quit. I mean, it was illegal and he still did it, potential punishments and all. If that didn't stop him, not much will. Since he is 18, turning him in obviously isn't an option anymore. The biggest problem you're going to have is that there's no question he's addicted by now. An addiction is a serious, serious thing. Threatening the relationship would not necessarily be effective, but could be very effective. I don't personally know him so I can't decide that. It would be up to you. The reason why it would be okay to threaten the relationship, or take a break, is because of the addiction. He could very well have an addictive personality. He didn't have too many qualms about breaking the law. All that put together does not make a good partner. It's not like he murdered somebody, but breaking the law is breaking the law any way you look at it. It has to start somewhere and he could potentially get into more serious stuff. It's probably not likely that this would happen, but this is very good leverage for you in helping him quit. If he can quit dipping, that would show you that he's not those things, he was young, made a mistake, and got in over his head. You know him and know he's not a bad person, but making him prove it to you might just work. Taking a break from him would really put things in perspective for him. What is really important in his life to him? How far will he go to be with you? It wouldn't be that you'd be taking a break because you were upset with him or didn't want to be with him because he dipped, but to give him an incentive. When he quits, he can be with you, he can see you. It would be like a reward, not a punishment. You'd be taking a break from him to help him, not to hurt him or make him choose and he'd know this. If you two are close enough, I really think it will work. It'll be hard and it will hurt not being able to see him, but he will feel the same way and he's the one with the power to fix it. Make sense? As long as he knows you're not mad, that you love him no matter what, and that it's just a way to help him since it's what he wants too, it could be very effective. Support groups, therapy and such are obvious ideas. You could have come up with that yourself and probably did. It's not for everyone though and that's why I think you asked this question. You don't think that these things will help him. He may also be unwilling to go. It wouldn't hurt to try, though, of course. Again, you know him better than anybody on here. All we know is that he dips and has from age 16-18. Not a whole lot of info. In order to help somebody, you need to know them very well. You have lots of options and ideas now, pick what you think he will respond best to. Good luck! :)
I know this is not what you want to hear, but he needs a lot of help. The best way to help him quit is to turn him in. He needs to be punished and rehabilitated and he needs therapy. This isn't a small problem, it's a huge one that he can't handle on his own and it needs to be taken care of soon. Now, it would, of course, completely destroy your relationship with him if you just went and turned him in. Even though it's without question what he needs, you can try to get around it. Get him into some type of program. A support group or therapy, anything. It would be a good start and it could help him a lot. If he refuses, threaten the relationship. If he still refuses, end the relationship and threaten to turn him in. If he refuses again, turn him in. Sometimes you have to hurt people to help them. It sucks, but that's how it is. Life isn't always pretty. I hope it doesn't come to that and I hope he gets the help he needs. Good luck. :)
What can I do to make my Halloween party amazing and unforgettable? Details would be GREAT! Thank you :)
Have a sort of Clue game going on. Set up a crime scene and leave clues around your house. Make the clues lead to an killer and an accomplice. What makes it great is that the accomplice and killer are actual guests at your party and they have no idea. The best part about this is that people don't have to participate if they don't want to. It would just be an ongoing thing throughout the party that would entertain some a great deal and others wouldn't bother with it. You would announce it at the beginning of the party and people could do as they pleased with it. Even if nobody really gets into it, having a "crime scene" at a Halloween party is pretty cool. It makes for a good atmosphere. In all probability though, quite a few people will get into it and it'll get really competitive and really funny, especially if the person that "did it" ends up finding that out themselves before anybody else and has to try to cover everything up. Other than that, make sure you have lots of snacks and drinks and a backup plan in case what you do plan doesn't work out. A good backup plan would be horror movies, or even horror movie spoofs like Scary Movie. Good luck! :)