-Hey world I've been on here awhile now i just wanna say being on here has been great! im not a specailist but im here for anyone that needs someone to talk to. :) feel free to ask me anything and don't feel ashamed, im not here to judge.we all have daily battles,but it doesn't mean we have to face them alone.with that being said I look forward to meeting you ;)
Website: yahoo.com
E-mail: alexuslafayette@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: fortworth,tx
Occupation: to help anyone who is need of advice
Age: 19
AIM: @allove913
Yahoo: alexuslafayette@yahoo.com
Member Since: April 19, 2009
Answers: 130
Last Update: March 16, 2017
Visitors: 11369
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I've been going through a recent complicated break-up. The thing is I kinda rejected him because I want to get my life back together first before being in a committed relationship. I wasn't able to offer my heart back in return to this guy who loved me so purely because I got scared that the moment I say 'yes' we'd be in a really serious relationship. And the thought of being in a serious relationship scared me. I got scared and I made a stupid mistake by talking to it with another guy friend. And it almost felt like I cheated on him, he felt like I cheated. And now he's not in love with me anymore and that it's impossible for us to be together again. Which hurt so bad.
I know all of that's kinda convoluted, but long story short, I'm hurt because I hurt the one guy who's never done anything but love me so purely and see the best in me by being a stupid and weak girl. What if he's the one for me, what if I blew the chance to be with my soulmate? What if I never meet anyone who will love me as much as he did? I can't get over the pain and the loneliness no matter what I do.
I know I've made a mistake too. But I'm not aiming to get back together with him, because he's already said it's impossible. Now he just wants to be friends with me because he knows we're really close and he doesn't want to lose that and he said that I don't deserve to be abandoned completely. What should I do to get over him and forgive myself? I'm really sorry it was really long. Thank you to anyone who will help. (link)
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Talk to him. Tell he everything. He still loves you. Love can hurt but if your with the right person things get better. If you want him back let him know that. If you don't uts still good to put everything out there. Everything will work out
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What is four play? (link)
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Think of it as pre-sex before you have a sex . its things you do before you have sex, to get ready for sex. it could be playing sex games, talking dirty, etc.
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I have invited another woman to have sex with my husband while I watch. She and I have meet and I like her, she is just the type I wanted for this experience.
She and my husband have not meet and won't until the night of the event. She is coming to our home where we will enjoy drinks and conversation first.
I'm looking for ideas on how to make the transition between conversation and sexy time smooth and less awkward. She and I have talked about bondage and restraint being part of the evening.
Ideas? Suggestions?
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Maybe you should ask her about what she would like to do. Or maybe ask your husband. You don't have to tell him what you're doing, but in a hypothetical way.
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This whole day I've been crying on and off since my boyfriend(19) is going to be leaving for college in less than a week... I'm a senior(17) in high school and I'm really looking forward to graduate... But not the in between. I cant imagine going to school without him and I feel like I'm going to be so lonely. We are still planning to date throughout this coming year and I'm planning to go to the same college...
However, on top of all of this I get really scared he will find someone more prettier or more positive than me. He says hes not but I get really scared. I just really love him.
Please do not say that its just young love since its way more than that... I've lost my virginity to him and we've been dating for a while and I love everything about him. If anyone has been through the same situation I would thoroughly enjoy some help! Even if you haven't, I really need all the help I can get. (link)
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It's ok to be worried or even scared about your boyfriend being away. I have a long distance relationship ship my boyfriend is a truck driver(23). I (20) worry too because anything can happen. But you gotta have trust in your boyfriend and you gotta believe in what you have for eachother Will over power any temptations he may face in college. Does your bf worry that you'll meet someone while he's away? Im pretty sure he's worried about losing you too. But the love that you give him, probably makes he secure to where he's not worried. Everything will turn out fine. Be loving and supportive of his move to college. Everything will ne fine just keep in touch with him..
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How should I say I like you to a boy if I'm a young girl? We've been friends for a while and now I want to be more than friends. I don't want to ask him so it sounds awkward and puts him in a weird position. How should i ask him without making him feel uncomfortable? (link)
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It really depends, I think that the best way is to ask yourself, " what would he do?" Being that you his friend you might know his reaction to things. Also a good thing is just to ask him. Hypothetically an example : hey what do you think of friends dating?" Or (depending on your age) maybe try doing things to show you like him. I hope this helps in some way good luck!
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Hi, so I've been dating this girl for a few weeks. Now she is REALLY beautiful, all the guys are after her. I even received a text from one of her guy friends saying he was going to try and steal her from me. She also hangs out at some other guy's houses the whole time. I know she is loyal, as am I, I just get worried because we really love each other, but she lives in Texas and i live in Tennessee. It's just that I've dealt with long distance relationships before, they don't work out. But with her, I know it will last a long time. I'm just wondering, should I be worried? Should i keep loving her? :( (link)
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Long distance relationships have their challenges, but every relationship has obstacles. part of being with someone is having trust and another is communication. Have you guys talked about that text message? Did you tell her how it make you feel? If she doesn't care or if she makes you feel as tho it could be anything more than just a text . You should leave. In relationships especially long distance relationships. There should always be that security that you're the only one. You should talk more about that "friend" texting and figuring out a solution together. I hope this helps good luck!
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Hello,
My boyfriend and I are 17 and 18 years old. We started a long distance relationship a little over six months ago. Back then, I was still a virgin and he knew that. However, a few months ago I cheated on him and lost my virginity to a guy I honestly had no feelings for. I was completely aware of what I was doing and I did it because I really just wanted to get it over with. I made sure there were no feelings attached. Now, the guy still chases after me, but I want no business with him, or any other guy rather than my boyfriend. I love him to death and really have no trouble remaining faithful. I realized it wasn't worth it and he's truly the only guy I ever want to be with. However, I know that he'll want to break up with me and his heart will be completely shattered if he knows. He keeps talking about how magical he wants my first time to be once we finally see each other again. And I believe it will be magical because it'll be with him. I don't want to lose him, but I do think he needs to know. I also don't think it's any conversation to have via phone/text/video. A close friend told me not to say anything '"cause there's no point". I know if we were in the same time zone it'd be easier to confess and try to win his trust back, but I have a serious disadvantage by not being able to daily demonstrate my true feelings towards him. I've thought of telling him in the far future, once we're living together, but I don't know how he'll feel about it after such a long time...
Also, I'm actually kind of glad I did it only because it was extremely painful, and he wasn't the one who caused that terrible experience. The guy was gentle, so it would've been bad either way. Should I tell him when we finally meet again? If so, should I do it as soon as possible, or do I give it some time? If I do choose to tell him, I know I probably shouldn't have sex with him until he's known, but I'm terribly scared of ruining the possibility of a future with him.
I'd appreciate any thoughts and advice,
Thank you. (link)
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That's very tough.. I think overall you should tell him. Because you don't want to carry that guilt. It isn't fun and probably won't be an easy thing. But I think that he can respect the fact that you told him. it could all still work. He could forgive you and it wouldn't be so bad but I think that you should call him about it. (Unless you're going to see him soon) if you tell him. I think he can at least appreciate your honesty. I hope it works out good look
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This guy likes me and keeps talking to me and I want to make sure I'm not accidently flirting with him. Can you tell what not to do? Thanks (link)
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My question(s) to you are 1 do you want to flirt or are you playing hard to get? Are you interested? I feel the best way is being direct with your actions. You can do that without being mean just be yourself. If you would like him to stop jyst say . I'm not interested in you in that way. (If you're not interested. I hope this has helped you .good luck!
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I'm dating a man who is somewhat wealthy, I'm not sure exactly how wealthy he is but he's in a financial class much higher than my own but I don't think he's like a millionaire.
He really wants to help me with my life and he really wants us to have a solid relationship where we see each other often.
I've grown from lower class (as a child) to middle class (as an adult working and handling my own bills) but it's still very hard sometimes to pay all the bills and because I had a rich best friend growing up I now have a taste for expensive things and sometimes I get really depressed that I can't afford them.
It would make a world of difference to live a better life with him and I think I'd really enjoy it but I don't want to rely on him and then have things not work out a few months later and not have anywhere to go.
He lives in a different town than I do about 4 hours away (there and back) and he would want me to come live with him. I mean I can always get a job down there but with the economy in America the way it is that might be difficult.
Currently I split an apartment in my town with two friends and I just got a new job but it's nothing amazing compared to what he might help me get in his town. With the job I just took I'm going to be working more than full time and might not even have time to see him and that scares me too because I don't want to lose him.
I'm scared to give up what I have here but then again I don't have much here. I have my own car which is a good 2012 hybrid. The apartment can be taken care of by my roommates. I don't have anything else so it's more just the fear of the unknown than anything.
Should I take a risk and agree to let him help me get on my feet in his much bigger city?
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It's always scary facing the unknown. But do you love each other? Being in a relationship should be about a partnership. I understand being independent but there's nothing wrong with getting help. If he is serious about the relationship (and so are you) he isn't helping you, he's loving you. There's nothing wrong with wanting better or the finer things at times. There's nothing wrong with moving aslong as its for the right reasons. Talk about it more with him. I don't know how long you stay when you visit,but maybe you can stay on your off days and see what it's like to live with him. Talk to him and tell him how you feel. I hope everything thing works out.
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Very difficult situation here.
I have a boyfriend of two years. I love him so much, he is the world to me.
About two months ago I cheated on him, while very drunk. I kissed a boy I'm in college with. Not for long but it was still unacceptable. Then later on that night, I ran into a male friend of mine (who is 100% gay) and kissed him for about two seconds, in jest. Naturally I felt awful.
I told him about the first kiss straight away, because I thought it was important to. He was mad and we had a rough time but he said it was ok because I told him about it.
At the time, I did not think the kiss with the gay friend was important. it has since started to eat me alive. And I don't know if I should say anything or stay quiet/
I think honesty is very important but on the other hand I don't want to hurt him more, over something stupid. Also, I think it makes it look like I will continue to cheat on him when I know I will not. I feel horrific, and I know I'm not deserving of this guy, but I really need some help.
Thanks. (Im 20 by the way) (link)
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Honestly, I feel the first kiss you mentioned was the most important. However if you didn't feel as guilty I would say let it slide. But it's hurting you and i think as much as it hurts tell him. If his love is real he will understand people make mistakes. I've been in the same boat and I know it's scary. But you'll feel better. Tell him exactly how you feel. Also just make a promise to yourself that you won't get drunk like that ever again. Because next time it could be worse. (I'm not saying you would let it go that far) I don't think that you're a bad person so just tell him and forgive yourself and (im sure he will too) love him and move past the issue. I hope it helps.
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My girlfriend recently broke up with me. She said the way we communicate, and the way we think is different.
She is a lot more emotional than I am, and suffers from depression. Because of this she tries her very best to be optimistic about everything. She's a dreamer, I am not. I am a realist. I'm in my head a lot. This can sometimes upset her when we have long talks because she wants to remain positive even knowing there is so much negative going on.
I told her that often times these two types of people end up with/need each other. The realist to keep the dreamer grounded and the the dreamer to get the realist off the ground sometimes.
Then there is the communication aspect. She claims I'm dismissive, and I agree, sometimes I am. But to be fair, sometimes she will talk about something I generally don't have much of a reaction to. Other times I just have so much to say that I will dismiss what she said, and say what I have to say. Which is not okay, but sometimes hard to control. (Ever since kindergarten I've had troubles raising my hand before speaking)
I really want her back. I know things can't go back to normal right away but am I crazy to think that there is a possibility? She kept mentioning that maybe for right now we're not good for each other; imply that there is a chance that someday we will be.
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I understand that ,because I have dealt with that in my relationship, even tho my relationship still needs work we are working at getting better and it has. Ill give you the advice I gave my boyfriend. First there's nothing wrong with having an opinion. But also remember you are in a relationship. You have to think about her feelings aswell as your own. Listen ,listen to her. Relationships can be confusing but im sure everything she does is the key to understanding her. Also it is in the way you say things that can be hurtful,aswell as what's being said. Because sometimes paying attention to one thing she says could make her whole day. Her always seeing the brighter side is her way of supporting you and trying to motivate you to better days. I read you mention she suffers depression so her cheerful ness that she always shows may not just be to keep you from rainy days,but from herself aswell. I hope this helped in some kinda of way.also remember to not be impulsive, but take your time and speak with your heart. I hoped everything works out
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My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year now. I am almost 18 and he is 19 years old. We are hanging out this weekend but we are short on money and getting really bored of the usual "just hanging out" cuddling\eating and cooking\talking etc. Does anyone have any ideas of something fun we could do at home? Any ideas would be great, we are up for anything! besides movies though lol (link)
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Well the most important thing is always making it count when you guys are together. I see that you guys probably are doing that you just want something new. Idk if you guys are long distance or living in the same town. But maybe have a certain theme for the night. (Maybe it's cheesy but a game night,they have a lot of apps for couples or just fun apps you guys can play together.) Or maybe if you live by a park,plan a picnic. Or around this time a year (depending on where you live) they have free things you can do..like most places that have parades can be free but they usually are far out.. The possibilities are endless.overall just talk to eachother about things you can try together. I hope that this helps in some way
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I'm 20 and I broke up with my first love a year ago. I loved him with every fibre in my being and did literally everything for him, even if it went against my morals. I spent all the money I had on getting him expensive gifts and I stuck with him, even when he couldn't care less about me. When we broke up because of the fact that he didn't wanna deal with commitment, at this stage in his life, he wasn't upset, not even for a day. It's been over a year and I've been the only one carrying all this pain and I've been holding so much hope that we could get back together, someday. We still see each other and he kisses me and that's what gave me hope that he still likes me. But last night, he told me that he'd never even think of marrying someone like me and that he needs a submissive kind of girl who doesn't pick up on the wrong things he does, like I did.I always picked up on all his lies and everything he hid from me. It hit me all at once, last night that he's been using me this past year and using my vulnerability. I cried in front of him for two hours straight and he kept saying the same things like "You're not my first love so I can't hold that much love for you" and "I told you I didn't want a relationship" "My first made me lose all my emotions" . I don't know why I'm so attached to him or why I'm even this devastated over a jerk like him. I just need someone to talk some sense into me. I worry, that I'll never be good enough for someone. What else can I do for someone to make them appreciate me? I allowed him to cross so many limits of mine and went above and beyond for him, and I get this, in return. How will I expect the next guy in my life to appreciate what I'll do for him and not break my heart again? (link)
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Im sorry I took awhile to answer. First I wanna say the worst feeling In being in love is to feel that you've gave your all and nothing is given in return. Im sorry that he hurt you , and made you feel what he shouldn't have made you felt. But the best advice from being in the same position you are in is being able to love YOU .it sounds "cliché" but its true ,often times people will enter our lives and make us feel something we never felt by ourselves. That's why we can't let go.but you gotta find the beauty in yourself. Its hard but you have to take it one day at a time. And once you unleash that inner beauty and confidence. It'll help you move on and it'll help build up walls that only the person that was meant to love you and climb over. Also never be afraid to love. Don't feel stupid about loving someone. If anyone should feel stupid its him. He doesn't deserve your love. Love him and yourself to move on and find someone who will give there all to you. I hope I helped. Don't ever lose hope in finding love.
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Dear Vikki
I'm 24 and from South Africa. I have been in a relationship for almost 7 months now and before that we were only friends. I love him a lot and care about him a lot, but at times I feel that my insecurities gets in the way and it ends up in us having an argument about something small and stupid. See we have a long distance relationship at the moment and it is mostly when he cannot have decent conversation at night because his busy and then I start thinking "maybe he doesn't want to talk to me" , "maybe he doesn't find me interesting anymore and he will leave me for someone else" and I do know that he cares for me a lot and that he loves me and as soon as I think I have these feelings under control, it creeps in again. I don't want to lose him, because I was insecure and clingy. I never was like this in the beginning. I was cheated on before and most of the times it is when I'm away from him, when we are together, I don't have it and because of this it makes things hard for me. I care about people real fast and they can actually hurt me with words. How do I get past this? How can I get past my insecurities and not be clingy when I feel like these emotions are creeping in? I'm not jealous when it comes to being his girlfriends, because I know what type of guy he is. I know he will never cheat on me, but because I don't always see myself as beautiful, I'm sometimes afraid he will leave me for someone more beautiful than me. The guy that cheated on me used to say to me, that I shouldn't think that someone can love me, because there feelings will change. I was so deeply hurt.
Is there any advice you can give me? Guess I'm just looking for someone to talk to that I don't know personally!
Thanks!
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Sorry for the late reply. But first I wanna say that I understand the struggle of being in a long distance Relationship, its hard being away from eachother if you don't talk you feel something is wrong... I do this too , but what helps is knowing that he makes time for me.my fiancé is a driver so the time we have is always changing but just knowing our relationship gives me comfort, if your man shows you he loves you embrace it, and use that as your warmth on those cold nights you can't talk. Also missing your boyfriend when you can't speak or wondering if he is thinking about you isn't being clingy its being in love. It's healthy to share how you feel with him. That's what me and my boyfriend do and sometimes he thinks the same way that I feel. Also my advice for feeling that at times you aren't good enough my friend you are beautiful! Look in the mirror and learn to love what you see, you gotta learn to love yourself before you truely can enjoy being loved by someone else.im sorry for the guy who said those hurtful things but he lost a great lady, people sometimes don't know when they have a good thing until it is gone. I hope I've helped in some way.remember you are beautiful.
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ok, so thats me, the one with the girl hating my guts. I couldnt log into my account, so i had to reset amd i just used a quick account, but, the girl (L) will crumple up my notes when i send them to her, and shes been pissed now for about 4 months. And is anerexsia really that serious? She needs professional help? :0 (link)
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I'm sorry that I've replied back late. Yes anorexia is very serious it can infact be deadly. The best advice is to just support her and listen to her. Everyone who deals with anorexia has their own story behind why they are that way.. but yes I would say she should go to counseling to help her with her condition. But situations in this manner should be handled delicately... Because telling her she needs help my be a challenge because she my feel she doesn't need it most people who need help don't want it.i wish you well on patching up your friendship and getting her the help she needs
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Its been almost 3 years and they have had there good times and bad times but today i didnt talk to her because I didnt want to fight and when we spoke she kept fighting with me... I feel like dying because she is my life and i am so stressed out, what should I do? (link)
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Sometimes it's hard to love, sometimes it's even harder to let go.. tell her what you feel inside. Tell her you're sorry (even if you think your right) tell her you just want to stop fighting . it's obvious that your love for her is stronger and more important than the fight. I hope you guys can work it out :)
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Well ive been with this guy for almost 2 years. We broke up about twice so far. The first time i managed to get him back and he told me that he missed me and realized he still loved me. But it was also partly because i gave into him and gave him bj the two times we saw each other while broken up. But its cause i asked him straightforwardly the thirdtime when we were about to do it again. But the three months togwther then was mostly us doing sexual stuff like up to third base and thats it. But we didnt have much time to just bond and talk. Were also a bit long distance seeing eachother only once in a week or two. But this time he broke up with me again giving me a bunch of excuses. His friends even told him that we wouldnt work out which i think possibly influenced his decision. But his friends dont even know me because my parents are strict so i mever got to meet his friends. But well a month of no contact with him then the second the month ended i started talking to him and asking to see each other for closure. But once i saw him it wasnt closure but me asking to get backand being desperate. Then he blew up on me saying we should just let it go now hefore it gets even harder to let go later on and that hes trying to move on. Then i stomped out yelling i just dont get this. Then he texted me a day after explaining that he feels like hes in the relationship for sex. And then from tere we judt argued back and forth because i got hope from that. And on saturday i lashe out on him ecause he asked this girl to prom when he knew i still liked him and i wanted to go to prom with him since junior year. And then he lashed back put on me. And then we argued intensely until thursday. Because on thursday he told me the modt hurtful things like im annoying him that he cribges when e sees my texts and that everything was in the past its over and that he takes back all the hope an consideration he gave me a few days ago when he really thought of possibly geting back together. And that im lucky he hasnt blocked me yet. Well to be honest i feel so hurt but i still want a try but im scared to hear hurtful things. But i want him to be with me again. Idk if i should move on talk to him or what i should even do!!! I honestly want some possible way to slowly get his love for me back again. (link)
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Relationships aren\'t easy.it hurts to feel like something that once was so perfect could turn so wrong. But somethings cone to an end whether we want them to or not.i think he dies care and part of the problem could be his friends .but if the only thing you guys could be was only physical, that majes any relationship toxic.my advice is to take it slow and be friends. He cares enough to be honest. Go to him and say you want to have a clean state.no drama just be cool and asjs to be friends, if he cares enough then he\'ll accept your request. Then you guys can get to know each other and maybe find love. If for some reason you can\'t work it out.then maybe he wasn\'t meant for you.
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I truly loved a girl name preethi she lives in Coimbatore im Arun maheedhar in same area because of her situation and completion of her parents she left me we both doin masters in Coimbatore the day of her proposal is Nov 8 th around 7.30 in the evening then our life was awesome for few days like upto Dec 30 th the same year 2013 I was last seen her at Dec 30 th 2013 evening I dropped her in a market place and I left with tears and my tears still not stopped today april 6th 1.14 am I was feeling very sad abt the memories I tried to erase her memories but I can't I tried many things but only fail remains in love in carrer in life only her memories left with me now I want to die with that same memory but I don't want any resurrection after this life it's enough I'm now not fit for my life. Her birthday is April 9th so on that day I pray for her life for last time and I want to die with those memories please tell a way for a quick painless death (link)
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Im sorry for the way you feel...I thought about raking my own life once.i can't tell you how to hurt yourself, but I can tell you that your life is so priceless and that you gotta be strong. Your life is worth living.it doesn't seem like you cant carry on but you have to take it one day at a time .
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Do you guys honestly think that everyone is destined to meet someone? Especially during a certain time of their life.
I feel like everyone around me has someone or has people in their life they could potentially be with. Whereas me, I don't know anyone who I can see myself with at all. I'm about to be 21 and I can honestly say I've never really been in true love before and Im scared because my life is going to get tougher and more hectic as I continue with school and my career and I'm worried I won't find anyone. I'm also worried that the longer I hold out on finding someone, the more people I could have potentially be with, will find someone else. Sorry for sounding a bit confusing with my thoughts. But what do you think? (link)
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I believe love happens when its supposed to,i think that.its great to focus on.school and.work,but if you really want to be with someone look into speed dating,or going tobs spot that you like hanging out,etc..give.it.a try! everyone hope this helped in some way good luck!
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My boyfriend always calls me gorgeous and babe but i dont know what to call him. Any suggestions? (link)
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I had that problem too. you can call him things that remind you of him. Be creative. Example :give him a cute pet name . Or just call him handsome or sexy
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