GirlOfEmotions's advice column | GirlOfEmotions's Advice About Love Life

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Q: how do i tell a girl who i lost feelings for that i want to break up with her when she is still crazy for me?

Ask if you guys can talk.
Have it be silent for a short time so she can get the vibe that something is wrong.

Then you can say something like this:

I don't think it's right for me to be with you.

her possible response: Why?

I don't think I like you as much as you like me. And it isn't right for me to stay with you and lead you on, and hurt you later on.

There isn't really a nice way to break up. Even saying "We can still be friends" hurts. But things have to happen.

Q: well in my partcial day class thing, theres this girl, her names tracy.. and like personaly the first time i saw her i thought she was a guy, like alot of my friends also said that too when they first saw her, but i when i first saw her i thought she was hott, cause i really thought she was a guy, but now that i know shes a girl im still attracted to her, and i dont get it. why?! does that mean im like bisexual or something ? because like.. i think i like her ? and its kind of odd.. someone please help ?

You liked her because you thought she was a guy. so that's different. And the fact that she really LOOKS like a guy, attracted you. if she looked like a girl, do you think you would have been attracted to her? You're not bi/lesbian from what i can see.

Q: my friend, ( 18/f ) is a lesbian. me, ( 15/f )i am straight. she went out with my sister but they both cheated on each other. i talk to my lesbian friend alot of my sister.thats basically all we talk about but thats fine. my friend is still in love with her and all. but shes always calling me and talking to me about her problems and everything. i think mabye she likes me. how do i tell. she said there are only a few people she will ever listen too and im one of them. idk mabye were just good friends but how am i supposed to know if she likes me?

Well if you continue talking to your lesbian friend, she might get the idea that you have feelings for her. The best way to avoid her from getting near you is to give her a single, SOLID advice that she can live on and take it from there, because you can't keep saying the same thing to her to make her feel better for only a short period of time. Or if you prefer to be straight forward with her without question, you can bluntly ask her "Do you have feelings for me?" The question might scare her but you can always clarify that you just want to make sure so things won't be awkward. Hope things work out.

Q: Alright.. I really like guy1 I mean really.. he is like my best friend also.. he has liked me before but we never went out.. me and guy1 don't even hardly talk anymore tho..and there is guy2 he's really sweet i uste to like him i probably would start likein him again, but he's not really a person that is popular and he asked me out last night but i don't know if i should.. what should i do wait for guy1 that i really like or forget about the guy1 and wait and see if i start like guy2?

you shouldn't have second on thoughts on guy 2 based on popularity. but if your interests differ significantly that you'd run out of things to talk about and things get boring, then it wouldn't really be right. Since you and guy 1 havent been talking lately, try sticking around guy 2 for a while and see how things work out. i mean, he DOES like you. what's the point in waiting for #1 if he's not really around anymore? but it doesn't mean you CAN'T revitalize your friendship with him. just expiriment on both of them, but don't take it too far that you're having too much fun jumping back and forth from guy to guy. hope it works out (;

Q: 14/f
well for me it kind of gets really depressing when i see all these couples and people finding 'the one' and i feel left out, i have had my chances but they just want me for something else.im not exactly the prettiest person alive, actually im far from it. and i cant seem to find him, its really making me mad/sad/depressed. i know when the right time comes it will happen but do you think you can give me some tips to hold up till then because it seems like it will never happen, or wont it

you're fourteen, i'm fifteen and i have never had a boyfriend. yes, i get sad whenever i spot couples too close to each other and all that jazz. but for now, enjoy being single, because i heard having a boyfriend causes a lot of drama (besides all the rumors that you hear about how great love is). and they're not lying when they say there are "ups and DOWNS" in relationships. don't worry, the guy will come around.. and probably a few other guys will come across you too. stay up (;

Q: Ok to put it straightfoward.. my boyfriend won't make out with me. We've talked about. And I mean we've been going out for a few months so I think we should.

How can I just like getting it stated with him. I'm used to the guys starting it with me.

Help!!

Yeah it's kind of awkward for him not to approach you first. but it may be because he hasn't kissed a girl before and he's not quite sure on how to do it. since you guys have talked about it before, he knows your experienced with the whole make out process and is expecting you to go for it. hope it works out (;

Q: i am 15 and i have never had a boyfriend or even been kissed. is this unusual? i think that i just intimatate guys too much and it makes them not what to ask me out. i dont know. so is this unusual..? and tips to get guys to ask me out would be greatly appreciated...

we share the same shoes! i'm fifteen, and had never in my life had a boyfriend and had never been kissed (except on the cheek). but i've witnessed a lot of relationships from friends, and 4 older siblings so i guess i can say i know a lot. but your 'problem' is not unusual at all. don't stress about it. to get guys, you can be a little softer on comments and hold back on the comebacks. but if you can't resist, you can do it with a smile, but without intimidation.. riight?

Q: im 14/f my bf is 17. he is always talking about how he wants to marry me and how much he loves me. i love him. i know you will think im to young. im not to young to know love. alright. so he got me this necklace for christmas that has a heart on it that on the front our names are ingraved and on the back it says "7 or 8 more years..." theres a story behind it...but its about me and him getting married in 7 or 8 years. then for valentines day he got me a ring. he wants to get married in 4 or 5 years now.... and he calls me his wife. like when he intorduces me to his friends he callse me his wife. and even to his mom he says hes going to see his wife and stuff. and whenever i see a baby i want one of my own.... is that normal? to want to have his kid? me and him have never had sex or anything. were really jsut good kids in love. so is that bad/wrong/weird/normal?

it's very normal to dream the way you do. and he seems like a keeper. but you just have to realize that if your dreams to become a reality, you're going to miss out on a lot of things such as boy watching with friends at the beach and all that fun stuff. but i totally understand that when you say you love him, then you love him. that's really sweet of him to wait for so long for you. this can be true love, but you'll never know when it comes to love. it's a hard topic to understand. and your other questions? "is it bad/wrong/weird..?" not at all.

Q: OK i think this guy that I have been bffs with forever likes me. I wicked like him too. Only problem is, i could be wrong cus like, im fat. Hes cute too. I guess my question is .. does weight matter to everyone. And im a really big tomboy, i dont wear cute preppy clothes like all of my friends because i dont like things w/ a tight fit, im like a DD. Just please help !

weight doesn't matter. unless it's an a-hole that likes anorexic skanks thats all skin and bones. just observe the things he does around you, does for you, and says to you. it'll be obvious if he likes you. and if you considering on changing your look, like the way you dress.. think about it before you do it. you don't have to dress the way other girls do and be another clone. it seems like that guy likes you because of who you are right now. changing yourself might make things different. (;

Q: I like this guy... and he likes me. yeah. makes sense. were like... together- but I just like.. LIKE LIKE him, but he's obsessed with me. He likes me more than i like him. is that bad? or.. well. he kinda just wants to get more involved right now more than i do. like... well. im just fine being simply 'together'. he wants to get into all of the LOVE life kind of deal. how do i deal with it?

Take it slow. and if he's a fast one, say you're not ready for it. because if you go for it and its really not what you want, you'll just end up in a bigger mess and hurt his feelings more by letting him find out LATER that you didnt have as much feelings as he had for you. 'love' takes time to grow. if u get into one fast, it`ll end sooner.

Q: how do you dump a guy without hurting his feelings?

there's no such thing as a nice break-up. it depends on the guy. you can try telling him that you're not ready to be in a relationship at the moment. and dont forget to bring up the fact that he's the only guy in your heart and he'd be the guy you'd come back to when you're ready for one.

Q: ok i have been dating this guy for awhile now and i care for him alot but i dont think a relationship is what i want from him anymore.hes to CLINGY and SENSITIVE.he always wants to just talk to me or just hang out with me alone.he never wants to talk with me and my friends we always have to be alone.i noticed i never have time for my friends anymore and im always going to be late.i have already tried to break up with him twice but he just cried and i felt guilty so i took him back now ive had it and we got into a fight about my friends a couple days ago and now im just avoiding him because i know when i do talk to him hell cry...help me what do i do?!?!?1

it's because he's not use to the break up or it might even be his FIRST break up. but if you keep running back to him, he'll just get used to your returning constantly. If you won't be his first heartbreak, who will? maybe years later when he gets into another relationship break-up, hes going to be ridiculous and cry when someone dumps him.

Q: ohkay, so im like a reeeaalllly slow runner when it comes to ... running? i get 12 minutes on my miles and i dont know what im doing wrong. i weigh 110lbs. im not fat but not stickly skinny. can anyone tell me how i can run faster and make it easier for me to run without getting tired?

It doesn't matter how how much you way or your body figure. it depends on how much/which carbs, vitamins, and all those nutrients you consume. if you're healthy, you won't have any trouble breathing and you wont run out of breath as fast as an unhealthy person would. just adjust to a healthy eating plan.

Q: I saw my bf at the mall with another guy kissing him! Not just kissing but making out! What should i do? Should i confront him?!
HELP me please!
Thank you soooo much

whaaat? your BOYFRIEND kissin another guy? just DUMP him. easy as that. i wouldnt kiss my boyfriend if his lips've been on another guy's mouth. i know regular couples always give each other a chance but you've seen what you saw and what you saw was the truth riight? what other explanation can be an exception to THAT?

Q: Okay well me (14 f.) and my friend ( who is a guy) got in a fight and i hate it because i dont even no what were realli fighting over and its stupid and i kinda like him and he DID like me up untill his ex started liking him again. and shes one of my friends and the only person that nos i like him is my best friend. But he like hates me now and i cant even talk to him and im not sure what to do becuz i like him but even if he did like me back i dont think i could go out w/ him or anything becuz my best (guy) friend hates him. i mean he ust to be best friends w/ him and now he realli hates him. and he gets mad at me for just thinking about liking him. im so confused and i dont no what to do can anyone help me get out of this mess?

if your best guy friend was REALLY your best guy friend, he'd accept the fact that you like the guys he DISLIKES. and he`d do anything to make you happy.. right? and if the guy you like is a smart dhood, he'd realize what a jerk he was about what he caused. if he DOESNT realize it, then he's not worth liking.

Q: Ok, I was recently in a relationship, and I was dumped. So now i have my eye on this cute guy who i like and he likes me. But because im not dating someone i feel like im like gay, but i no im not cause i love this boy. and I DO NOT desire girls!!!eww. im just confused, and need good advice. Its kinda the past thats bugging me, and i know i cant change it. I kissed a girl, because she forced me, i never wanted to but i did:-(! and thats bugging me now, it was about 3 years ago! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

if you still think about the incident that happened 3 years ago and enjoyed it, then you might be 'gay' and you can't help your feelings. try spending more time with the new guy you have your eye on. if there's no spark between you guys, then spend your time being single for a while. during your vacation from relationship, observe what you find yourself staring at.. girls? guys? both? you'll find a solution. (;

Q: ok well theres this guy and ive liked him since 0ctober....well he likes my friend ALOT and the day my friend and someone eles started going out he called me and said he liked me...i dont know whether to belive it or not but he seems like he does but i dont know if its true because i think he just wants to get her jealous...please ill rate high..what should i do?!

if it seems really obvious that he's using you, don't let that fool toy with your heart. play hard to get. and if he keeps wanting more of you, just ask him bluntly if its that what he's trying to do (get your friend jealous). he'll feel like a total idiot if he finds out that you knew all along.

Q: there is this girl at school that i really like. i want to ask her out but i don't know her that much.

what advice could you give me?

thanks

Don't ask her out just yet. because if you come on too strong, it'll be a scary experience for her. so starting out as friends is a good way to start. If you have any classes with her, you can just easily do a lot of things to catch her attention such as opening doors for her and all those gentleman procedures. (;

Q: ok there is this boy .. and i have liked him for more than a year now ... @ the begginning of the school year he SOOO acted like he was into me .. but then he started goin out with this girl nd they broke up .. now he doesnt even talk to me ne more unless i am w/ his friends or sumtin .. [ we have sum of the same friends ] .. but he barely talks to me then ... he is the "popular/jock" boy and im a "redneck" ... so i guess im not on his level .. but i dont kno if i should start talkin to him again or what? HELP ME PLEASE! i rate high!!!!!

Theres no hurt in going up to him and start conversation randomly. i mean, you guys DID talk before and you did nothing to make him stop talking to you. if you stay away from communicating with him, that's just going to make matters worse.

Q: so im a freshman in high school.
ive never been kissed before.
i really dont have any guys friends.
ive had a bf before but that was back in middle school.
i wanna know, are there any REALISTIC ways to get involved with more guys and friendships.
please dont say; just talk to them
becuase im not like that exactly.
i like this kid, sorta, and we talk sometimes
are there any signs i can look for to see if hes into me or anything.
i'll rate

if that 'kid' somehow gives you a slight glance, give him a quick smile. it wont hurt. sometimes a smile can trigger a dude's feelings for a girl. and if you don't talk to other people, then you'll never learn to become socially interactive with anyone. im not saying just go up to anyone and start having an awkward conversation.. there are times when it can happen since you said you weren't the talking type. just feel confident about everything you do, and if someone happens to ask you for something, don't seem timid about it and they'll think different about you. a lot of things can be obvious from a couple of words and how it's spoken.