"People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone." - Audrey Hepburn
I came to this site for advice about a man and love. That very question turned my entire world around and I have had my eyes opened to things I never noticed before.
I've stayed here so that I can share the knowledge I do have. I know I'm not changing the world but I do hope that I spark others to open their eyes.
"The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself." - Oscar Wilde
So, if you learn something from what I say then repeat it to someone else who can use it.
I hope that if you see an answer of mine that you enjoy it will inspire you to go out of your way to give good, solid information. Provide links for further information, detail your responses, encourage people to seek out professionals when it's needed, and stop sugar-coating responses and just say the truth.
I hope that even if you absolutely hate my answer that it'll kick start your brain. Hopefully you'll begin taking your time to respond instead of hurried answers that are useless to an already confused person.
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost
Gender: Female
Location: WV / KY / ND
Occupation: Technical Account Management
Age: 24
Member Since: October 12, 2007
Answers: 1511
Last Update: August 15, 2011
Visitors: 144078
Favorite Columnists
karenR
DangerNerd
russianspy1234
GilbertMar
ThirdQED
mikesadvice
Eldritch
my2cents
|
| |
|
I'm a 21 f my friend is pregnant and freaking a little she is like 5'0 and 110 she isn't a big person. she has been watching too much tv in my opinion but she keeps thinking that when she has her baby it will get stuck in the birth canal cause she is little. its scareing me a little too since were the same size is this possible please help i want to calm her down and don't know how thanx (link)
|
The size of the vagina doesn't really correlate to the size of a person's body in most cases.
I'm 5'11" and a very large woman, being well overweight for the average 24 year old, and my vagina size is actually much smaller than average--to the point that insertable menstrual products (cups, tampons) are too large for my vaginal size. When I have my annual pap smear a "small" or "child-size" speculum can be used just fine (and is MUCH more comfortable for me).
Just the opposite may actually be true for you, your friend, or even someone as small as a midget (don't know if you've EVER seen midget porn but, yes, there are very small people who safely insert very large things into their vaginas without issue). You could end up having a larger-than-average vaginal size and not even be aware of it. Just because you're short and/or thin doesn't mean your vagina is teeny tiny.
Women have been giving birth to healthy babies since forever, even before medical help, including drugs, were invented and popularized. While there are times where things go wrong, there are usually large indicators beforehand that there may be a health concern for vaginal delivery. With educated medical professionals and the great newer abilities of modern medical equipment, problematic deliveries are at an all-time low.
Her doctor will be able to help her when it comes time to give birth. The doctor will estimate the circumference of the infant's head and the natural dilation to the vagina (aka "birth canal") and base the delivery upon those sorts of measurements. Doctors and/or a nurse will keep track of her vaginal dilation to make sure her body is preparing to give birth properly.
It's extremely rare for an infant to get completely stuck within the vagina. The vagina is very stretchy, naturally dilates to accommodate an infant's delivery, and is fairly short and slippery inside. Of course, there are also natural contractions and pushing to aide the movement of the baby out of the uterus and into the world.
If the infant was to pass through the vagina, but is too large for it to naturally accommodate the size, then there could be some minor "tearing" or "ripping" of the flesh. It occasionally happens. The doctors can suture the problem area up almost immediately and it will heal back to be normal again. Just a little extra added soreness while the mother heals. This issue isn't too common any more though, and if there are ANY concerns of ripping/tearing then the doctor will just cut the abdomen and do the full "c-section" to spare the mother the extra discomfort on her vagina (though, I've heard it's much harder to heal properly from a c-section).
When my friend, who is 5'6" and a little chubby, gave birth to her little girl they thought everything would go fine and she would be able to deliver her naturally. The doctor estimated the size of the infant's head and, after some debate, came to my friend and said, "We're going to have to do a cesarean so that the delivery goes well. The baby's head is more than [number] around and the average woman can only pass [number] through safely." The doctor was able to tell this an hour or so before they actually prepared for the birth.
She needs to express her concern to her doctor so that he/she can talk with her about it and help her relax over it. She is really worrying over absolutely nothing.
|
|
So long story short: I'm 18 years old and sexually active. I always use protection, as in condoms. 2 months ago I went to a doctor to get birth control. I wasn't supposed to start taking it util this month when I got my period. But it's 12 days late. I haven't had sex since the end of October, and I've taken 4 pregnancy tests a couple days apart. All of them came back negative. So I'm really not sure if I'm pregnant, or what could cause my period to be so late. Going to my doctor or telling my parents is not really an option.So thats's why I'm asking for some advicce. But if I don't get it inn the next week or so, I will try and make an appointment to get looked at from a doctor. Anything would certaainly help a lot. (link)
|
I have to disagree with another user's advice. In high school I knew a girl named Melissa. She was having sex with her boyfriend, and using the pull-out method, and then her period missed in 11th grade. Pregnancy test after pregnancy test showed a negative. She ended up going to the doctor to see what was going on and she was very much pregnant.
So, out of curiosity, we all convinced her to keep taking the pregnancy tests to see when it would show positive. It seemed logical to us--we'd finally figure out WHEN positives started showing. So, once every few weeks we'd chip in for another test and she'd go in the bathroom after school...and we'd wait around to see when the first positive would show up.
Her belly grew huge. The pregnancy tests never, ever showed positive. Not even a faint positive line. Always negative. Always. We're talking about, her waddling around at 8 or 9 months with a "negative" test result. She gave birth to a healthy little boy, but if she had only trusted the home pregnancy tests then she wasn't pregnant at all. ;)
So, for some reason, it IS very possible to be pregnant and no over the counter pregnancy test pick it up. I would assume that, for some reason, Melissa's hCG pregnancy hormones just weren't accumulating as they should have.
Is it common or likely to happen? Probably not.
It IS possible to get your period after becoming pregnant, too. A lot of women get a period for a month or two after getting pregnant--this is why some women have no idea they are pregnant until they start showing other symptoms.
Stress, diet, exercise, etc. they all do affect your period, too, of course. Ovarian cysts, uterine fibroids, and cancerous cells, STDs, and STIs can all cause your periods to change, too. This is why it is very important to get checked out if your periods become strange.
I'm just saying, it isn't impossible that you're pregnant. I definitely would not go as far as to make a statement of: "You are not pregnant."
I would say, it's not likely you are pregnant because:
It's been long enough since the last time you've had sex that a pregnancy test SHOULD show an accurate result.
You used condoms, which have about an 88% success rate in preventing pregnancy.
So, if I were you, I'd do my best to just RELAX about the whole situation. In the worst case scenario, you're pregnant. That's not the end of the world, right? Life would go on. So, relax. :)
Take a pregnancy test only once a week. There's no reason to waste more money than that, really. Once a week should be just fine while you're waiting for an appointment.
Call your doctor. Even if you aren't pregnant, there could be something going on in your body that should be checked out. A doctor can also run a blood pregnancy test, which are more accurate than the over the counter tests you can buy.
Don't take your pills until your period begins. Do exactly as the doctor recommended. I know you don't want to wait, but it's important to take them just how the doctor said to.
|
|
My boyfriend and I tried anal for the first time tonight and it was HORRID. He would poke around my anus and it wouldnt hurt, but when he put ALOT of lube on his penis and my anus and shoved the head in, it was the worst pain ive ever felt in a very long time. i almost passed out, i was having cold sweats, i was dizzy and i came very close to throwing up a couple of times. And a few hours later, i have been cramping around my cervix and its been the worse day of my life.. what happend?! (link)
|
You need to go to the hospital. The emergency room. Immediately.
Just because you don't see blood doesn't mean something isn't hurt, torn, or damaged. The idea that you're having internal cramping in your lower abdomen coupled with cold sweats, dizziness, and nausea indicates that there is something seriously wrong going on in your body.
Things just aren't suppose to be shoved up there. To be successful with anal sex it takes more than just lube and a good thrust. The rectum can easily be torn and you can literally bleed out and die within minutes if the damage is severe.
Your boyfriend needs to read up on anal sex. You need to read up on anal sex. You aren't in a porn studio. You don't do this sort of thing all of the time. Your anal opening isn't stretched to naturally accommodate a penis. This sort of "he put ALOT of lube on his penis and my anus and shoved the head in" can actually be quite dangerous and even deadly.
Go to the ER. Clumsy accidents like this happen all of the time where one or both partners don't understand the human body and how things like this should work. There's NOTHING to be embarrassed about when seeking medical help for this. There are hundreds, if not thousands, of people who go to the ER for this sort of thing every single day. Nobody will think you're dirty, stupid, wrong, or nasty because of this thing. They get paid to help people in this sort of manner, and they've seen A LOT worse than internal tears from anal sex gone wrong--trust me! Your health is VERY important. Your life could very well be at stake.
Like I said, just because you don't see blood doesn't mean something isn't hurt. You could be bleeding internally. You could have severe internal bruising. Your body is freaking out because it's trying to tell you that something is really messed up and wrong. Listen to it. Get immediate medical help.
|
|
If a girl touches her vagina breifly, then shortly after she touches her breast, then again shortly after I lick her breasts, can I catch a std if she does actually have an std ? (link)
|
I suppose it's possible if the woman is infected and you have a relatively fresh cut on your tongue, lips, or inside the mouth and the vaginal fluid was placed on the breast tissue that your mouth comes in contact with.
Just because vaginal fluids are moved to another location on the body doesn't mean they've been magically sanitized. Many infections and disease live outside of the body for a short period of time.
It's like saying you absolutely cannot get HIV/AIDs through kissing. They taught that in school for YEARS before realizing, "Well...you CAN if you both have open or fresh wounds that allow the exchange of such fluids into the bloodstream..."
Men and women end up with HPV, gonorrhea, chlamydia, and other infections through oral contact. There have been cases of HPV growths on things like vocal cords. The sad thing is, not many people think to get their throats swabbed for STDs until they wind up at the doctor with a sore throat and the doctor questions them about oral sex.
So, I suppose it's very possible. A lot of things are possible though. I mean, some men and women even have herpes lesions on their breasts and/or nipples because they engaged in oral stimulation there with an infected partner. It happens.
It's like saying you can't get herpes on non-mucus-membranes. It's very much untrue. A lot of people have herpes on their knees, elbows, cheeks, etc. If there's a break in the skin then the risk that you'll be infected is greatly increased.
You absolutely must protect yourself. That doesn't mean just using condoms and praying for the best outcome. It means knowing who you're sleeping with. Being able to feel confident that they are clean and disease-free. It means getting tested regularly and requiring that of all of your sexual partners. In the end, you're the only person YOU can rely on for your own health. Take extra precautions and don't be afraid to say, "No," to save yourself years of discomfort.
|
|
I like to keep juice in the fridge. This particular suspect was Ocean Spray Strawberry Cranberry Banana. I was not a big fan of it so I didn't drink it much. I opened it today after about 2 weeks of inactivity on its part. As I unscrewed the top, it hissed at me, much as a soda does when you open it. When I tasted it, it tasted carbonated. That juice was not carbonated when I bought it. The ingredients do not list carbonated water. I threw it out. Why did it taste carbonated? (link)
|
As I've read, it very well could have began fermenting. The yeasts just begin eating on the sugar and growing out of control. Maybe you were making some booze! ;)
The little microbes just produce a gaseous emission (CO2) as they consume the sugars. They also may produce other chemicals (alcohol) that alter the flavor of the juice itself. Refrigeration slows this process down, but doesn't stop it from happening, of course.
If the expiration date wasn't out on it yet then you could ask for a refund if it's been stored properly (sealed; refrigerated). If it wasn't out of date then it very well could have been "contaminated" at the source.
|
|
Me and my boyfriend had sex on the 23 one time on the 24 , 25 , 26 , 27 two times and on the 28 one time . each time he came in me . My period was on the whole time but it wad light but a couple of of times it dripped heavy . I thought we were safe . But I found out you can get pregnant on your period . Is it a chance I could be pregnant . And I have been sleeping to to to much . My throathas been hurting and I dnt wanna take nonthing that will harm the baby if I am ! (link)
|
You wouldn't likely show any pregnancy signs or symptoms for about 2 weeks (14 days) after the egg was fertilized. At the 2 week mark, it's even a bit pushing the "early symptoms" factor--but it has very well been noted. The egg has to become fertilized, multiply a little, attach to the uterine wall, and cause the body to start producing larger amounts of the pregnancy hormone, hCG. Your body would need to be producing enough hCG to cause hormonal and bodily changes before you would "feel" the pregnancy.
You very well could be pregnant. Most women don't ovulate while on their period, but it does happen to quite a few. Most women ovulate around day 14 in their cycle. I, personally, don't even ovulate around that date. I ovulate around day 20, which, obviously, makes all the difference in the world when you consider cycle length, sperm life, and sexual activity. More and more women are finding that they don't ovulate mid-cycle (day 14) like they've been told. It's partially due to stress, partially due to environmental factors, and partially due to added hormonal consumption in milk, beef, birth control pills, etc.
Your best bet is to wait until your next period to see if anything misses. Then, if it misses, take a few home pregnancy tests. They would be relatively accurate by that time.
Other than that, we can't say if you're for-sure pregnant or not.
You very well could call up a doctor for an appointment, and talk with the nurse. You could say, "I have a sore throat but I think I might be pregnant. What is safe for me to take for it?" They're usually pretty nice in answering those sorts of questions.
In the meantime, to soothe a sore throat while pregnant:
Warm tea sweetened with honey
Gargle with warm sea salt water
and here is The American Pregnancy Association a list of medication ingredients safe for pregnant women or expecting mothers (take any medication in small doses; don't go overboard):
http://www.americanpregnancy.org/isitsafe/medications.html
|
|
Well i seen a similar question on here but i still wanted to ask my own. I have been getting a bump on my pevic hairs almost everytime my period is here or coming and i also thought it was herpes but the time that i had unprotected sex i got tested after that and i didnt have anything then later the bump would start to appear and i asked my aunt and she said she gets them to but and thats its a boyle. I am going to go to the doctor but im scared what could it be? I also have a UTI that i always seem to get and a possible yeast infection. Do i have herpes? Or is it just a boyle? Please help. Ps they only come wit my period. (link)
|
Boils are usually pockets of infection that can be reoccurring. They grow in size rapidly, are extremely uncomfortable, and typically contain a large amount of blood and puss when they break open. They are usually only reoccurring if there is trapped infection under the skin that become irritated. Many times boils require lancing and a series of strong antibiotics if they reoccur.
To get the same boil every time you get your period is actually probably pretty uncommon.
The funny thing about herpes is that it will spread even if you have "protected" sex. The condom doesn't always cover the entire infected area of the other person. Condoms actually do a pretty poor job at protecting against hsv-1 or hsv-2 because the virus has a tendency to spread onto non-mucus-membrane parts of the body.
I suppose a herpes lesion can somewhat mimic a boil. It can grow in size, but is usually not as large as a boil. It does break open and seep but doesn't have as much blood fluid or white and yellow puss in it. It would reoccur in about the same location like a boil. It may be itchy like a boil. It can cause a great deal of pain like a boil.
You should really talk to you doctor about it. Many times bloodwork doesn't show herpes. Most STD testing doesn't even test for hsv-1 or hsv-2 unless you specifically request it. You should have the lesion swabbed and scraped the next time it appears, as well as the STD bloodwork (request both herpes strains to be tested for). Your doctor will be able to do that and give you the right answer.
If it's a boil you can get some antibiotics to clear this reoccurring infection up. You want it to be cleared up or you may very well end up with some nasty scarring.
If it's herpes your doctor can talk to you about not spreading it, and you could get prescription medication for it if you'd like.
|
18/f
is it mandatory for me to get a pelvic exam/pap smear..?
like if i go to the doctor because of a cold, and then they say "we need to test you for pelvic exam" am i allowed to say no thanks?? because i'm really against it.
i remember one time i went to the doctor for a physical for school and my mom was with me and they said something about pelvic exam and i thought it was my hip or something and i remember my mom said no to it. is that allowed? do i have a right to say no to the exams? or am i basically forced into it by doctors??
don't tell me "its recommended". i know its recommended. i've tried searching online and thats all i ever get. "even if you dont like it you should get it" blah blah blah... i dont care if its recommended... i'm not doing it.
part of my problem with getting it done is because i've never had anything go up my vagina before except once. that was when i tried putting in a tampon and it hurt like a mother f**cker. from that day, i've never worn tampons because it hurt so badly and i never wanted to experience it again. i can't handle tampons. call me a baby. but there's no way i'm gonna let some doctor shove a giant Q tip up my vagina.. (link)
|
You have the right to refuse any sort of treatment, testing, or medication. Nobody can force you to see a doctor or have the right thing done.
You have to know though that it means you might not be able to get appropriate treatment if you refuse something so basic.
There is absolutely no reason to be "against" pap smears. They are only put it place to make sure your reproductive organs are not damaged and you don't have cancerous lesions internally.
If you're afraid of the pain then talk with the doctor. This may seem shocking but they even have equipment small enough to do internal exams on infants. Yes, babies. Some women have smaller vaginal canals if they are virgins and a good, caring doctor will move to a smaller speculum is you say, "Hey, I haven't really had anything put up there before. I tried using a tampon once and it was too large and hurt. Is there something you can do to make this easier for me?" They'll switch to a smaller tool, use a little more lubrication, and even safely warm the tool up for added comfort.
I, too, could not handle tampons. I had a small vagina. My vagina was actually made so small that there were feminine hygiene products that were suppose to fit almost all women...but they were way too large for me and caused me a great deal of pain. I passed out more than once when trying to insert a tampon. Trust me, I understand your fear here.
And, I'm not sure if you've even seen the swab they use, but it's really just longer than wider. It might look like something huge to you but it's the least uncomfortable thing I've ever, ever had done to me. You barely feel it, if at all. It's only long so that the doctor doesn't have to put their gloved fingers into your vagina.
So, while you very well can say, "No, I don't want that done," you will get strange looks and you will miss out on A LOT of preventative female reproductive health-care. There is no magical alternative way to check vaginal health so if they suspect you have something wrong then you are just going to have to hope they're wrong. This means if you wind up with infections, pregnancies, or pain in the area then you won't be accepting treatment. Not such a great idea.
It's only a once a year thing. If you find a doctor who will work with you and use smaller tools then you won't have a problem. Trust me. I've had bad doctors and good doctors. At 13 I didn't know I could request special procedures. By the time I turned 18 I realized I could ask for specialized, smaller tools. My best pap smear I've ever had was in a small clinic where the nurse practitioner used a smaller instrument, more lubrication, warmed the tool, and actually talked to me during the procedure ("So, you said you were going to college..." I guess it's an odd conversation to have in that situation but it made a world of different for me).
A good doctor will accommodate you so you don't give up such a basic preventative care option.
|
Ok I am a 26 year old male... It's a girl that I have been talking to for the last three months...We haven't seen each other we meet off of
a social networking site... But we haven't seen each other before... But for the last three month we have been texting each other everyday and, talking on the phone everynight for hours... We have been sort of liking each other since we talked... But we both kept the relationship on a friendly manner... But when other females try to talk to me she gets jealous and vice versa... so the day before yesterday we both admmited that we liked each other... And if our meeting went right we will date each other... shes way on the east coast and im on the westcoast... but next month i was gonna fly out there and take her on a date... and we were going to hang out... so i asked her could we have sex... and she got all mad and was like no... she treated me as if i was wrong... but 5 min before she was saying that she would rape me... i mean i knew she was joking but we joked alot on a sexual manner... she's 20 and she has been with 5 guys and three different women... so it's not lik shes a virgin... and i dont think i was wrong because i have been talking to her 4 three months and i geinuly wanted to start a relationship when we meet... I'm upset because I started to grow feelings but at the same time... I think she was wrong for treating me like this...what do you think? (link)
|
"Hey, you're super nice. I'm going to be flying over there next month and I'll take you out on a fantastic date. Oh, by the way, can we have sex after, too?"
Uh...any woman that is even slightly respectable isn't going to say, "YES!"
What type of woman do you think she is?
Just because she's had sex before means she has no self-respect or morals?
You just called her a slut. Just because you come over to see her and take her out on a nice date doesn't mean you're getting into her pants. Seriously. What is wrong with you?
You could have very well just blown the entire possibility of ever having a serious relationship with this girl. First you send her the, "I like you. Let's get to know each other better..." message followed up with, "I want to have sex." That is NOT how you win over a woman--no matter how horny or hard-up you may be!
If she had then came here to Advicenators and saw that you feel your question as appropriate and justified because:
1. She made a joke. You both knew it was a joke. You've joked before. (FYI: Jokes are...JOKES!)
and
2. She's not a virgin. (So...she's now deemed an immediate slut that will open her legs for anybody who flashes a smile her way?! What?!)
Then, boy, she'd probably trash your phone number in a second. If any guy I was "talking to" said, "Can we have sex?" and I said, "Uh...no!" and he followed up that stupid question with, "But it's not like your a virgin!" Then I'd probably feel like he deserves to feel bad. Seriously.
Just because she isn't sexually pure doesn't mean she's a whore or that she's easy. Past sexual encounters could be viewed as mistakes on her part. The past could very well be "in the past" on her side.
Three months of a friendly internet and phone discussion doesn't mean you deserve to get laid. It doesn't mean she will even like you. Heck, you haven't even committed yourselves to each other and you're looking to get her in bed right away?
She isn't wrong at all for being upset.
I would be furious.
You need to apologize for your behavior. Explain to her that you didn't mean to disrespect her by asking for sex immediately, but it's just that you're extremely attracted to her and feel a connection. Explain that you didn't mean to hurt her feelings or cause her to be upset. You can tell her that you got mixed signals since you two have been joking about sexual things recently and thought that asking bluntly would be taken lightly. You just weren't thinking with your head.
|
|
I am fifteen years old and all of my friends get their periods every month like no problem. some of my friends are irregular. irregular as in 4 months maybe? but not one year. yep that's me. i've ever only gotten my period twice. once a year. january 2009, i got it for the first time when i was 13. i hadn't gotten it in a year and then january 2010 i got it for a week. now it's december 2010 and i haven't gotten it ever since.. my boyfriend and i want to start having sex and we will use condoms and pull out but im soooo scared of becoming pregnant. it's so bad. like if i see that precum went through his shorts while dry humping i freakk out. can pre cum get you pregnant? also, even though my period is so irregular do i have just amount the chance of getting preg as everyone else? or am i infertile? my mom won't let me go on birth control.. i also hear it makes people gain weight like crazy and i love my body. so, can someone help me out? (link)
|
Since I answered your questions about pre-cum, infertility, and irregular periods I suppose I'll just talk about birth control pills for a moment.
Hormonal birth control pills affect different women in different ways.
On average, a woman only gains about 10lbs while on the pill.
For me, I lost weight. I lost about 20lbs when I first started taking birth control pills. I was about 13 year old at the time.
For my friend, she didn't gain any weight or lose any weight. She was about 15 or 16 year olds when she got on the pill.
In the whole scheme of things, if you actually did gain the full 10 possible pounds then it, most definitely, wouldn't make you "fat."
If you diet and exercise properly then you shouldn't really notice much of a weight increase at all. If you give into your monthly cravings of sugars, salts, and unhealthy snacks then, yeah, you're going to gain some weight.
|
|
I am fifteen years old and all of my friends get their periods every month like no problem. some of my friends are irregular. irregular as in 4 months maybe? but not one year. yep that's me. i've ever only gotten my period twice. once a year. january 2009, i got it for the first time when i was 13. i hadn't gotten it in a year and then january 2010 i got it for a week. now it's december 2010 and i haven't gotten it ever since.. my boyfriend and i want to start having sex and we will use condoms and pull out but im soooo scared of becoming pregnant. it's so bad. like if i see that precum went through his shorts while dry humping i freakk out. can pre cum get you pregnant? also, even though my period is so irregular do i have just amount the chance of getting preg as everyone else? or am i infertile? my mom won't let me go on birth control.. i also hear it makes people gain weight like crazy and i love my body. so, can someone help me out? (link)
|
You aren't likely to be infertile.
Polycystic Ovary Syndrome tends to cause ovulation problems. The egg is only released every once in awhile because of a hormonal imbalance that affects cyst growth on ovaries. It usually isn't too alarming in young women, and, at fifteen, you likely don't have that.
There could very well be a hormonal imbalance that is preventing your uterine lining to be shed properly. This doesn't mean your eggs aren't released and that you can't get pregnant though. It just would mean the tissue in your womb isn't as healthy or renewed as another woman's. Sometimes this is associated with endometriosis or uterine fibroids--both which are treatable.
If you're underweight or have a relatively low weight. The body doesn't send a signal if you are lacking the proper amount of bodyfat. A lot of 15 year olds are too thin for their bodies to ovulate properly. A typical woman should have about 20% to 25% body fat to be considered healthy. Anything lower than about 15-17% body fat you may notice a lack of menstruation because hormonal functions cease.
Not ovulating every month doesn't really mean you're infertile. It means the chances of pregnancy to occur are lowered, but not nonexistent. Unfortunately, we can't even say that ovulation is your problem. You may be ovulating just fine but just not shedding uterine lining as you should be.
Heck, there are PLENTY of women who have TRIED to get pregnant for 10+ years and then, magically, they wind up with a bundle of joy on the way. The female reproductive organs are funny like that.
You should really get checked out by a doctor for this. If it's gone on for 2 years then you may have a hormonal problem that is easily treatable and can cause your cycles to come more regularly. Not shedding uterine lining is really not good, actually. You won't die or anything, of course, but it isn't really good for the body. We'd meant to shed that each month if we aren't pregnant.
Birth control pills should only make a person gain about 10lbs, on average, if any. Some women end up losing weight (I did). Others end up staying a stable weight (my friend did). And others gain up to about 10lbs. No big deal, and with proper diet and exercise you can keep that weight from being packed on in the first place.
Yes, you can get pregnant from precum. While a full ejaculation can contain as many as 100 million sperm at a time, the sperm count within pre-ejaculate can be as many as a few million. It takes one to get your pregnant. If you vagina doesn't come in contact with the pre-ejaculatory fluid on your boyfriends pants then it isn't even a concern of pregnancy, really.
It's time to see a doctor. There is a misconception that women should wait until age 18 or until they start having sex to see a gynecologist. This is wrong. A woman should have a yearly check-up once she begins menstruating. It helps to keep up on things in the early stages. It helps to make sure hormonal balances are kept and that everything is healthy. See if your mother will let you talk to a doctor about the missing cycles. Something is going on inside of you. It isn't normal to go so many months without a period.
ANY time ANY woman misses a period for 3 months or longer it is time to see a doctor. It doesn't matter if you're a virgin or not, young or old, black or white. It's time to get this checked out.
|
|
Hi i'm a 18 year old female who has a serious problem with her body. lately on my lower level of the body...i've been getting bumps. i've been having them for over two years now. i'm not sexually active or anything. i'm still a virgin. i don't know what to do. my overall concern is that i think i might have std's or something. but i'm really hoping its nothing of that sort. please please help me or give me dome advice...!! (link)
|
Virgins can very well have STDs.
If you're talking about reoccurring bumps on your vaginal area then it could be herpes since they typically appear, break-open, disappear, and cycle through again through various times of the year when the immune system lowers. You could have contracted it by a parent during a harmless diaper change as an infant and have gone years without an outbreak now (very common, actually). If you read any sort of herpes-help forum you'll see that TONS of parents accidentally forget to wash their hands before a diaper change and wind up spreading herpes to their infants. :( Not their fault. Accidents happen. Tons of people go so long (10+ years in some cases) between break-outs that they don't even realize they're infected, too.
Beyond that, it could be a rash. It could be an odd strain of HPV that you body had been battling. It could be a skin infection. It could be an allergy. It could be excess yeast in the body (not necessarily in the vagina) or a skin parasite.
There are so many possibilities that we're just taking a stab in the dark here. Personally, I would call the doctor when the sores appear and get them to check those out, do some swabs and scrapes, and maybe blood work to make sure everything is okay. You're 18 and should be having your regular female exam once a year anyway even if you're a virgin still.
So, the next time the bumps appear call up the doctor and get a quick appointment. Express your concerns over an STD infection. Have them do the swabs, scrapes, and blood-work. You'll get a for-sure answer and maybe a way to treat this problem easily :)
|
Hi, I have a female hamster, and over the weekend she was climbing and got her foot stuck in the bars. We managed to get her out of it, but she was kind of hurt and was hobbling around with the injured foot in the air. I don't have money to take her to vet, so she's kinda been nursing herself back to health, but she won't stop climbing her cage. I know it's normal for them to climb and play around, but she just got stuck again (though she managed to get herself free) and I don't know what to do. I want her to stop climbing so she'll stop getting hurt, but I know that's not possible. Should I maybe sell her or give her away? Is there anything I can do? I really love her but I don't know if I can handle her behavior.
Any advice works. Thank you in advance! :) (link)
|
A quick solution is to move her items into a cage with no bars so that she cannot climb the sides of the cage. This is really important for hamsters and other small rodents, usually, because they like to climb around and one fall from the top of a cage could mean death for these fragile animals.
If you have a 10gallon+ fish-tank around then that's a great start until you can purchase a different, more appropriate cage. It won't let as much air through the cage but she will be much safer then and not risk her life so much.
So, if you have an old fish tank (even if it's crack and leaks with water--remember, you're not filling it up with water at all) then you can put her bedding, toys, chew sticks, food, etc. in there. You can cover the top of it with some sort of meshing you might around if you don't have a mesh lid. You can actually buy a great fitting mesh lid for tanks though because a lot of people keep rodents and reptiles in these containers.
http://www.petworldshop.com/zilla/fresh-air-screen-cover-gallon.php
So, move her to a better cage and there shouldn't be any more problem. Her water bottle can be fashioned to the side of the cage with a hook that is designed for it or some wiring if you can get it figured out (but if you do this make sure you put something slightly heavier than her on the mesh cage cover so she can't push it open a little and escape).
An even better idea might be to use a big, clear Rubbermaid container and punch a few holes around it (not close enough to let her climb; and punch the holes from the INSIDE outward so that she can't get her teeth around the puncture to start chewing; punch the holes fairly small) to let more air into the cage. You can make your own meshed cover with a few basic supplies. If you have a handy dandy father around he might be able to do it if he's into that sort of thing.
|
18(9months) male
I have this girl I have had sex with and we were both clear, actually she was, that it was only that and nothing more would ever be yet now she wants to act as if we are dating though she rejects me and won't have sex either. What is the deal because I am lost entirely. (link)
|
Girls just cannot do "friends with benefits" types of situations.
For women, sex is an emotional connection many times. They feel that sex is bond-forming. It's a pretty natural reaction for a woman to develop "feelings" for a man after being sexually intimate.
A lot of girls will say that this won't happen. They'll claim that it "never happened before" or that they are incapable of falling in love. It never fails though. The girl ends up fabricating some scenario in her head that the guy has more of an emotional connection with her than really exists.
There absolutely must be a hundred or more questions here on Advicenators about how a girl has a "friends with benefits" relationship with a guy, who has made it clear he doesn't want anything more and they've agreed upon it, but she "secretly" has a "major crush" on him and she wants to know if he's madly fallen in love with her now that she's spread her legs. It is kind of repetitive. It happens.
So, now you're figuring out why friends with benefits types of situations just do not work. Ever. The girl becomes jealous, overly attached, needy, and has some fantasy that the sex is more than just a fun time.
It's simply time to cut the strings and move on to something more healthy for you and her both. Sit down with her and tell her, "When we first agreed to this sort of thing I thought I was clear that I wasn't looking for a real girlfriend. I thought this was just sex, but now it seems like you think it's more. I'm sorry but I don't have these same feelings. This has to end today."
And move on. The sex seriously cannot be so good that you're going to torment yourself like this.
Seriously. Even if she swears she'll go back to just having sex or something...she really, truly won't. Majority of females are unable to just have sex without forming emotional connection. When a woman eventually breaks that barrier and they no longer form emotional connections to sexual partners then THEY are a broken woman--for whatever reason.
This sort of thing typically happens because sex is for reproduction. A female has sex with a man. If she gets pregnant she wants to be protected and provided for so she forms a connection with the man. A man, obviously, doesn't experience those same emotions since he wouldn't be carrying a woman's child in his non-existent womb. It's almost like instinct. It's just what happens to women. We form bonds even if we don't want to.
Seriously, you're not the only one that had sex with a girl and suddenly she's become some needy/clingy woman:
"I had sex with a guy. I want to talk to him a lot more and stuff but don't want to seem like I'm all clingy! After we had sex I can't get him off my mind! How do I do this without him knowing I'm now into him?!"
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=577130
"I told him we could have sex. Now he won't answer my text messages and give me more attention! How do I get him to be into me just as much as I'm into him now?!"
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=552971
"He said he liked me. We're having sex now after we decided to strictly just be sex. Does he have feelings for me?!"
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=505048
"We have sex. He talks to me. He doesn't want a relationship but he also talks to other girls. I say I'm not looking for a relationship but I'm really into him now that we've done it. OMGDoes he like me?!"
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=548050
"This guy and I are friends with benefits. He has a girlfriend. He wants to touch me a lot though when we're out. He recently broke up with his girlfriend, and we made out a couple of times after that. Does he want to date me now?!"
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=547936
"We agreed on friends with benefits but he doesn't talk to me enough! I have absolutely no idea what 'just sex' means! I want his attention more!"
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=547865
Move on for your own sanity and find a girl that is great in bed AND you can stand enough to be a boyfriend to ;)
|
I met this guy, G, about a month ago when we got together for a study group thing. Within that first week, he asked me out on a date and we ended up going back to his place and making out. He wanted to have sex but I told him no and he respected that. Well, after that night, he and I had a "talk" as to where we stand and he admittedly said that he wasn't an "exclusive relationship" type of guy unless he knew he wanted to marry the girl & that he was really sorry if he hurt me because he really does like me but he's not a relationship guy and he doesn't want to get into a relationship he doesn't know he can handle.
I really like him and he really likes me, that's for certain. I've spent the night at his place several times, we hang out a lot, go out almost every Fri/Sat night together, and we're either texting or talking on the phone every day. We've also had sex maybe two or three times. I know I've only known him for a little over a month but things just happened.
I'm confused as to where we stand now...I know it was probably a bad idea to get intimate with him so early. I've already had such a lengthy talk with him about relationships that I don't want to go through such lengthy discussions about where we stand and having sex again. He's a really nice person, very considerate and understanding - but I don't think *I* can deal with another "talk" so soon.
But I don't want to be "friends with benefits" type of person either. What should I do? (link)
|
The truth is, there isn't going to be anything more than a fun time between you and this guy. He tried to make it clear to you without hurting your feelings. He isn't the "relationship type" and doesn't want to settle down. A lot of young guys are like this.
You said yourself:
"...he and I had a "talk" as to where we stand and he admittedly said that he wasn't an "exclusive relationship" type of guy unless he knew he wanted to marry the girl & that he was really sorry if he hurt me because he really does like me but he's not a relationship guy and he doesn't want to get into a relationship..."
Sex doesn't mean there is a real connection for most people. Sex is just sex. He asked you to have sex on your first date. That didn't mean he wanted to date you, spend extra time with you, or even get to know you better. I'm sorry, but it's the flat-out, honest truth.
He can be the nicest guy you know but not form any attachment to women like you wish he would. He could treat you like a princess to your face, but only want to use you for what's between your legs when you get down to it. Just because he's nice to you doesn't necessarily mean he likes who you are or wants something more to come of this friends with benefits situation.
Skip the second "talk" because, to be honest, nothing will change.
He would tell you how much he likes you. That you're a nice girl. That he just isn't your type but wants to remain close friends. That he enjoys your company. Just that "he" isn't the "relationship type" or some nonsense that sugar-coats the truth of: "I just want sex."
Give up on the idea of a relationship.
Move on to something healthy.
Use this as a learning experience. A guy who wants to bed you on the first night has absolutely no interest in your personality, really. A guy who has sex with you and tells you to your face that he isn't "relationship material" is him being as honest as he can while sugar-coating the truth so he can keep getting laid by you.
Be glad you're learning this now. Move on. Move forward. Grow as a person. And get into a healthy situation with a person who really IS interested in WHO you are and not what you can offer them in the sack.
I don't mean to come off as so harsh but I've seen this happen SO many times. Some girl thinks that since they've now had sex that everything has changed. The truth is, nothing has changed except that you spread your legs for him now. He didn't magically become a "relationship type" of a guy in a few weeks. Honestly. It might hurt to know you're just being "played" with but you have to know and start realizing these things yourself some day.
And, for note, a guy saying he isn't an "exclusive relationship" type of guy means he's trying to say: I can't keep it in my pants. I can't form emotional attachment or connection with women. I have a tendency to be unfaithful. I have a tendency to have short-term relationships because I get bored with a woman easily. I like to play the field. I like to have my cake and eat it, too.
|
|
Ok im a 19/f and normally before or during i my period i get a bump down there, not alot just one bump and that lets me know my period is coming or is here, im not sure but lately i havent noticed it but this month i felt it and im worried, could this be a std? Yes i have been sexually active but i dont believe that the guy has anything but this bump scares me. Oh and its not on my thing its where the hair is! Whats wrong with me? (link)
|
Yes, it very well could a sexually transmitted disease.
Since there is only one bump that is reoccurring during your period then it sounds a lot like herpes, either of the HSV-1 or HSV-2 strains. A lot of women experience an "outbreak" when they get their period each month because of the natural hormonal changes that occur within the body, slightly lowering the immune system enough so that the virus sheds more rapidly.
Herpes can be spread on any part of the body. There are people with herpes outbreaks on their kneecaps. I mean, it doesn't have to be on a mucus membrane at all. If the virus is rubbed against you, and your skin is broken (even if you don't visually see it), the virus can go in and you can become infected.
If your guy doesn't have medical paperwork to show he is STD-free and clean then you can't really know for sure. Virgins can have STDs and not even know it. They, very innocently, not inform their partner(s) of their infection and the next thing you know...
And, sadly, herpes can be spread to others even when there is absolutely no physical sign of a sore, outbreak, or virus!
Personally, I would call the doctor. Explain to them that you have a reoccurring sore on you genital region around the time you get your period and see if they will do a swab/scrape of the are to test for diseases like herpes. Just for a note, normal STD tests don't even test for herpes because it's so incredibly common now.
I have a ton of information on herpes if this turns out to be the issue. There isn't any cure for it but there are plenty of things you could do to reduce the chances of outbreaks.
There are so many possibilities when it comes to herpes. It's likely to only cause one blister at a time but small clusters are very possible. It's likely to have the blister break-open at some point, but many times it doesn't even progress that far for some people. You can go many years in between outbreaks, or as little as a few days before a new sore appears. You can become infected as a child, very innocently during a diaper change, or as an adult while you're being gang-banged. You can get the virus in your eyes, your nose, your lips, your genitals, your elbows, your cheeks, your hands, your...well, anything, anywhere. It can spread...if it wants to, but many people don't experience too much spreading. I mean, there is not really a "set" of "guidelines" the outbreaks might really go through so you never really know unless you get the area swabbed/tested during the appearance of a sore. Heck, even some blood tests won't detect it if you're not currently having an outbreak!
And, of course, this might just be a pocket of infection that you need to get healed by some antibiotics. Reoccurring infections like that aren't good to have your body deal with each month, you know.
Any way, call your doctor up and make an appointment to get this looked at and tested. If it turns out to be nothing then GOOD! If it turns out to be something more then you'll be glad you found out now.
Links of herpes information I've answered:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=543782
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=586702
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=586695
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=572641
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=543782
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=586569
|
Okay, I've only had sex with one guy. It was my first long term boyfriend, and were both virgins. We used a condom about 80% of the time, so yes, there were some incidents we didn't use protection. But neither of us had an STD.
We broke up about a month and a half ago, and a week or so ago I started getting these symtpoms:
My labia, clit and the lining around my vagina are VERY VERY itchy. But it doesn't burn. And by using Vagisil on a daily basis, it keeps the itchiness away so I even forget about it. It's also kind of red and irritated looking. I have a brownish discharge, and even though I already had my period at the beginning of this month, I've been getting cramps that come and go through out the day.
Any help with what this could be?? I'm 17 years old. And yes, I did tell my mom. She said it could be soap irritation, so I stopped scrubbing "down there" but it hasn't helped. I have a regular doctor's appointment on Thursday, but I was just hoping for some advice before then. (link)
|
Virgins can very well have STDs, by the way. I won't rant on about that, but it's extremely possible. Not to get into a mess, but, I, myself, had a STD when I was still very much a virgin. If you don't have medical results to prove you're STD-free then you don't really, truly know. Virgins can very well grow up with an STD all of their lives, passed on through innocent contact with an adult (very common during diaper changes), and never think their symptoms really mean anything. They may grow up saying, "Oh, I get these bumps every now again and it's completely normal," and never, ever say anything to a partner about it.
This is likely not to be a yeast infection. Yeast infections don't cause cramping. Yeast infections usually don't have discharge colored brown, red, or anything other than an off-white.
Bacterial vaginosis (BV), a bacterial infection within the vagina and outer parts, can very well cause all of these. If left untreated for a longer period of time it may be accompanied by something called pelvic inflammatory disease (PID). PID would be more responsible for abnormal discomfort, pain, cramping, tubal blockages, and, in later stages, complete infertility.
BV mimics a yeast infection in that it can cause white, clumpy discharge, itching, and irritation. A lot of people end up treating themselves for these symptoms with over-the-counter yeast infection creams. This actually ends up worsening the problem. The seriousness of BV is unlike a yeast infection. A yeast infection won't damage the body, especially long-term, and is just rather uncomfortable. BV can cause life-long damage, pain, infertility, and a whole load of health complications when left untreated. You can hide the symptoms of itching and irritation with yeast infection creams sometimes but it doesn't mean you're curing anything at all. As a matter of fact, a lot of women who do this sort of thing wind up giving themselves a yeast infection, too!
Yeast infections don't cause cramps.
Yeast infections don't cause colored discharge.
You need to see your doctor. Seriously. The brown discharge could actually end up being from stress or hormonal changes as you're growing. The cramps could be from a pulled muscle, a uterine fibroid, a urinary tract infection, or an ovarian cyst. I'm not saying you "definitely" have BV or PID but I'm saying you seriously need to get this looked at because sometimes what you may think isn't so serious can wind up being pretty darn frightening and lead to reproductive damage.
As a last "possibility" you could very well be pregnant. A lot of women have early-pregnancy cramping and brownish to reddish discharge. Pregnancy also can cause yeast infections, would account for itching and irritation.
We can only take a stab in the dark what might be "wrong" here. We don't have medical equipment to examine you online. ;) I hope your doctor gets this sorted out and you get the appropriate treatment for whatever is going on.
|
At fashion shows what are the pins and tissue used for? The ones that they put in the models hair.
http://www.style.com/peopleparties/modelsearch/person4916/slideshow?iphoto=17
http://www.style.com/peopleparties/modelsearch/person4424/slideshow?iphoto=153 (link)
|
Are you talking about bobbypins?
Bobby pins are to help hold the style in place. They've been used for ages now. They're small, come in different colors, and fairly noticeable. They're slipped in where, say, a curl needs to be held tightly to the head but hairspray can't do that job--or, at least, can't keep it in place long-term (hours).
If you're talking about clips that hold the hair back then it's so the make-up artist can do the make-up after the hair has been done, usually.
Tissue is used behind hairclips and such so that the hair won't end up with weird crimps or bumps from the amount of pressure the hair clip creates. This are usually only used when the make-up artist is doing the woman's hair so the hair isn't in the face, can be moved back, and not end up causing the hair to be oddly wavey when they're removed after the make-up is applied. It just helps to add a little cushioning so that the hairstyle isn't harmed.
|
|
I want to show my passion for music in my college app but I do not participate in any band/orchestra. What else can I do to reflect this interest. What are good charities/organizations for music? (link)
|
Donations. Memberships. Volunteer-time. Fundraising / Charity events held. Organizational set-up in community. Organization of local musical events. Participation in local musical events. Musical hobbies. Community action involving music.
VH1 Save the Music Foundation
http://www.vh1savethemusic.com/
Guitar Center Music Foundation
http://www.guitarcentermusicfoundation.org/
Mr. Holland's Opus Foundation
http://www.mhopus.org/
National Endowment of the Arts
http://www.nea.gov/support/index.html
Tipitina's Foundation
http://www.tipitinasfoundation.org/
The ASCAP Foundation
http://www.ascapfoundation.org/outreach.html
Sound Art
http://www.soundartla.org/
Sphinx Organization
http://www.sphinxmusic.org/index.html
MIMA
http://www.mimamusic.org/index.htm
DownloadUplift.com / Music For Charities (MFC)
http://www.downloaduplift.com/
MENC: The National Association for Music Education:
http://www.menc.org/
(Membership application: http://www.menc.org/about/view/menc-membership-applications )
The Healing Music Organization
http://www.healingmusic.org/
|
|
I need a girl that lives in Waterloo Iowa and goes to Hoover middle school in 7th grade (link)
|
Try to be more open at school. Meet new friends there. Get to know a few girls. Figure out what interests you and what type of girl is most compatible with what you enjoy doing.
In 7th grade I was 12. At 12 I will tell you that the idea of love was completely different than what I now, at age 24, feel love means. At 12 I was very vulnerable and ignorant on the whole relationship/love idea.
Instead of looking for someone, just enjoy having friends and meeting new people. When a girl strikes your fancy you will be more confidant in yourself and be able to ask her out on a small date. If you go actively seeking love then you might end up getting burned by people who will use you to their advantage when they figure out desperation.
Just be yourself. Enjoy doing the things you like to do. Talk with your friends and meet new people. Be friendly and personable. You'll eventually meet the right girl for you and you'll be glad you were just yourself in the whole scheme of things.
|
|