about

I answer questions about:
- Art and design
- Life in general
- Addiction of any kind
- Friendship issues
- Gay/lesbian issues
- Cooking
- Weird/paranormal stuff
- Homework, research and ideas for a certain project
- Languages
- Middle East
- Movies, movie making
- Photoshop, Illustrator and InDesign
- Guitars, music and composing

So ask ahead.
Time to keep a low profile.

advice

Where can I download Sufjan Stevens songs on the internet for free? Please don't say Limewire...

If google didn't do the trick (when did it ever), try these sites:

www.seekasong.com

OR

downloads.nl/mp3.html


The 2nd site (downloads.nl) was a hell of a happy accident for me! I am still in love with that site, I dunno how I found it but I love it even though I don't understand a word 'cept for 'MP3'. It's got a search box, you type in what you're looking for and it gives the results.

If you wanna hear the song (not save it), left click to listen to it. If you want to save it, right click and save target/link as blah blah.

I've found so many songs on that site that Limewire never did - or ever will.


And no viruses. And it's faster.

Have funn with a double n!

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hi, i have long brown hair and im tired of doing the same old stuff with it. if anyone has any nice ideas of hair styles i can do before i go to school it would be extremely helpful. thanks much.

Messy bun.
Messy ponytail.
Let down and all messy.

It also depends on your style. I mean, what sorts of things you like. For example, I'm an art freak so you'll see me walking around with my fave paintbrush sticking out of my hair (it'd be used to 'create' and 'hold' the messy bun)...

Originality is what makes the world go triangle.

=)

I'd tell you to do stuff with it concerning color, but I don't wanna destroy your hair...and have you end up with 12 different colors in it!

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15/f
Well, the past week has been soccer tryouts and when we ran i was always last. (and i kinda have a low self asteem) so that didn't make me feel good. and i think the only reason i made the team was because i'm a goalie, where on the team the only goalies are me and someone else. and then right now i just want a specail guy just to talk too. i mean i don't really think i want a boyfriend i just want a guy to be there for me when i'm down and just tell me i'm beautiful. and i've been stressing with school because all my friends are super smart and i kinda feel that i need to be smart too. because right now i'm like 180 out of 430 something where as my friends are all in the ranking from 80-1. and i don't know just right now i've felt unhappy almost lost. i mean i'm happy i'm on my highschool soccer team but then most the time i'm like man i hope coach doesn't make us run too hard because i suck at running. and then with the whole boys thing i feel left out cause again most my friends have a boy to call at night. and then school..ugh. but i don't even know if anyone can help. but i just feel so lost right now and unhappy and again i just don't know. so if anyone has suggestions on what to do or anything please. i'd be thankfull for any advice.

I used to be like you...I was in the school band, had an awesome group of friends who were outgoing and I was the shy one, afraid of doing stuff they usually did, etc. I wanted to be like them but I was just let down by my failures. And I did something REALLY stupid, but it helped me get rid of this low self esteem issue of mine: I left everything I liked and tried something totally new. In my case (I was still 16), I left high school early and went to university.
I'm not suggesting that you leave your soccer team and friends behind - I still play the guitar and hang out with my buds every weekend. But I do those stuff in an entirely new way. When you're running, don't think "They all rock at it, I'm the only one who sucks!", instead tell yourself "They all suck at it just like me", then you'll find yourself saying "They all rock at it just like me!".
If you want to see how I 'progressed' and got rid of my self esteem issue thing, try reading a few early entries of my blog. Then read the recent ones...The change is just massive! (my advice column, website link).

Remember, sweets: Failure is an event, not a person.


=)
*hug*

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I recently went back to school after missing over a week for mono. Im falling really far behind in almost all of my classes, and im really worried. My teachers have been lenient and have given me time for makeup work, but its just not enough. I have to much work and not enough time. Im losing sleep because of the workload and as a result of this, im not getting any better sick wise. I have the flu now and just cant seem to get this work done. I thought about skipping a day of school to catch up on things but I cant miss any more days of school without getting points deducted from my grades for it. How can I manage the workload and still get sleep and not be so stressed out?

I'd yell "Time Management" and do a cheer over it - but I happen to be a Master Procrastinator, so...=)

Ask for help from your friends and stuff. I'd personally help you if you need help with research, h.w., whatever (university students can NEVER be too busy). It looks like you really care about your grades and all...so do what you think is gonna help you get rid of the extra load of work and make you get back on track with no bags under your eyes.

I was serious about the help thing though - if you need help of any sort, I'd be more than glad to help you. (check my column for my email and contact moi).

Best of luck
Kay.

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To get this out of the way... :D I am 16/f and this might be little bit long but please bear with me here :D

So I have been going out with this guy named Ryan for little over a month (which is my surprise and to everyone else as well because I never had relationship longer than 2 weeks but thats beside the point)

When we were hitting 2nd week into our relationship, he told me he loved me. I didn't say it back because I wasnt sure and he said it was okay and totally understanding so that's cool and out of the way.

But now it seems like I have to chase for him to like me. (well not exactly but I have to try and go out my way to ... well... like is the only word I can think of)

I mean just the other day, he stood me up because he forgot. I know he has terrible memory and whatnot but still that's not a good enough of an excuse right? i mean I understand if I didn't remind him about it but I had reminded about our meet over 5 times.

Also he again forgot to call to discuss when we can meet again after he promised. I know i know guys forget to call but he didn't have to promise about it which would've been lot better off.

So now I am not sure what to do. This lady whom I confide in lot of things (because she's a good listener and had been through all this...she's over 30 by the way but totally cool for her age :D) well she thinks i should end it right now because there's no point into being in a relationship if I have to chase after for it.

My friends thinks im being paranoid and unappreciative.

Which makes me more confused than ever. I can not go into details about this but I have hard time processing and have things thought out or even make a choice so please help

Clearly you care about this relationship - he doesn't seem to be that interested. Let him know that it's bothering you and all that.

Don't waste too many brain cells on this. If it keeps on going, end it. If he cared (at all), he'd come back to you and all the mushy lovey stuff would happen all over again.

Good luck
Kay

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I have these dots (red) and ingrown hairs on my legs, after years of hair removal (shaving, waxing, you name it). It's really annoying- even after waxing, I still have them and some of them are actually scars from having picked at them beforehand, which I know I shouldn't do. What are some effective ways of getting rid of red dots and ingrown hairs? if you happen to be of Mediterranean or Middle Eastern descent--or otherwise hairy background, you know what I'm talking about :P

Haha, I know exaclty how you feel. *is a Middle Eastern, not hairy but suffers from ingrown hairs and red spots!*

It used to be much worse for me...but now I use exfoliating lotion thingies to get rid of em. It makes the skin softer, blah blah, then you can get the hair to come out.

I'm planning on having the laser hair removal thing in a couple of years to get rid of the problem (and hair - thank the ancestors) for good.

For the red spots - use lotion. Massage helps as well. Look for Neutrogena products, as well as SebaMed. Don't listen to people who tell you these products are crap and meant to be used only on the face...

Best of luck! =)
Kay.

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ok here is the deal. my mom talks on the phone all the time to this guy from her job. she even goes to his house sometimes. every since she met this guy she has been acting differently. she dresses different, talks different and just acts different!!! one day she even bought a porn movie ( something that she has never done before). she is married to my step father who i hate but that doesnt matter because cheating is cheating. so i need help. is this really cheating and if it is what should i do? also she is 42 and has a total of 4 kids. two of them belong to my step father.

...Talk to your mom about it. I agree with the other comment about how it's not your business at all, but at some point you do come in and try to figure out what's going on. Just don't go around telling others about this...If news reach your dad or someone else in the family, things might get really effed up for your mom.
I'm sure she'd tell you herself if it was serious...

Best of luck with this,
Kay.

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my friend is wicked clingy. i can't go ANYWHERE without her up my ass. the thing is she has loads of friends that she hangs out with but when i try to hang out with other people, she tries to make me feel really guilty about it. i want to distance myself but i'm not sure how. help. :(

Tell her it's pissing you off.. And if she still keeps on doing it, do the same to her. I know that's not the right thing to do and all that, but...

Something like this happened to me in the past and I just went up to the girl and told her that "I wanna do this by myself - for once. I don't do it to you and you hell well know how it pisses me off. So, please...just respect that. For once." She was my best friend, and not just a good friend or anything.

We don't talk anymore, but what the ell =). You can't keep a friend close for more than 3 years if you live in the Middle East and are not from the region.

Best of luck,
Kay

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can bulimia cause esopagus problems?? and if so what are some sign and sympotoms of this??

Of course it can! I mean, you're basically FORCING your body to push everything out, the unnatural and unhealthy way...not only will it screw up your esophagus, but it will also screw up your heart.

Go to this website. I think you'll get better answers here...
http://www.mamashealth.com/bulimia.asp

Good luck.
Kay.

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i know another boy question! two weeks ago i invited aboy to come with me to a party. he came and we danced all night and he gave me a kiss on the chee before he left. for the past tw weeks we have been texting eachother non-stop. he ggoes to my old school so i dont see him a lot. but i cant stop thinking abbout him. i love him. but im scared to tell him this because im aafraid im going to freak him out. but i dont want to keep this texting back and forth thing going on if i dont really know how he feels. what do you think i should do? tell him or not?
xo

I'd suggest that you wait...But it also depends on how well you know the dude. If he's someone you met recently, then 'i love you' might scare him off or something.
I think he'll pluck up the courage to tell you that he likes you (soon). Don't think about it too hard - if I were you, i'd wait till he did something about it. If he didn't, I'd think that he is either (a) gay or (b) not interested and never will be. Then I'd move on.
He'll eventually tell you how he feels.
If you want to let him know how you feel first, think about this: are you willing to risk it? If he gets all freaked out and stuff, you're gonna get hurt. If he did like you back all this time, you're gonna be so happy (even if he told you later). Is so much thinking worth something like this?...
This might not be THE best advice ever or even close, but I hope it helps.

Best of luck,
Kay

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i just shaved my legs today. for passover break (which is at the end of this month)
if i dont shave all month do you think the hair would be long enough for me to wax by the 20th?
if not, how can i make it grow faster?
thanx!

Yea, it should be long enough...

I've heard that heat makes your hair grow faster. Sweating, staying under the sun (not for too long though - !!), blah blah...

But it will be long enough, don't worry.

=)

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Does ayone know any goodwebsites that have good quoptes for teenagers or life quotes pleas e??

Oh, if you google 'life quotes', you'll get tons of awesome sites!

Here are 2 to get you started.

http://www.quotegarden.com/teenagers.html
http://www.motivateus.com/tquotes.htm


Have fun!
Kay.

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What's the difference between
affect and effect?

The dictionary isn't helping me.

It's making me more confused.

Russianspy explained it clearly...I guess you just have to keep in mind which one's the verb, which one's the noun.

=)

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I want to improve my writing but I don't know what to write about.

Is there any website that has questions for writing in journals?
Like.. creative writing prompts?

Hey,

I found 2 good sites, feel free to google "creative writing ideas" to find more. =)

http://www.webenglishteacher.com/creative.html
http://www.teachingideas.co.uk/english/creative.htm

For the 2nd site, don't let the age range thing put you down. Write on and best of luck!

Writing songs can be helpful too...=))

Hope this helps,
Kay

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In the Pilot episode of the Black Donnellys, does anyone know who played young jimmy?

Tom Guiry.

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0347509/

Maybe my answer's wrong, but I didn't find 'young Jimmy'. I just found a 'Jimmy' who had played in an ep. called 'Pilot'.

If you wanna see it for yourself, it's here.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0496246/fullcredits#cast

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so confused. okay so i like this guy.of course. and well my friend was talking to him. and shes like oh yeah by the way my friend likes you. and hes like oh ok. shes like yeah. then they continued their conversation on i dont know what. and then she said hes like oh is she blonde? and my friends like yeahh why you know who im talking about? and hes like i dont know. then like maybe the next day or so hes like oh is her name "polly" and my friends like whos "polly" and hes liek the girl that likes me. and shes like umm yeahhh how you know? and hes like because shes your friend. and shes like um ok? and then like my friend is like yeah ok so what oyu think of her? and hes like shes cute. and shes like haha yeahh. and then like she now says that he is always mentioning me and stuff. but like he never talks to me. and i went on vacation but he told my friend that he wouldnt talk to me because he couldnt figure out who was who in my group and he didnt want to embarass himself. so i dont know. does it seem like he may like me or?

Yo Polly,
I think he likes you, yea. Prolly very shy and doesn't want to make a fool outta himself by going up to the wrong 'polly' and askin' her out.
Give him some time. If you still see that his case of asking the right 'polly' out is hopeless, make your move. Let him know you're the 'polly' he's looking for.

Hope this helps,
Kay.

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13/f.i just turned 13 this month.i go to a death trap of a school.i used to be really quiet till i was like 12.now im the freaky kind of person that scares people and i like freaky stuff like disecting brains and hearts in science classes. and i give people nightmares a lot. i do like that kind of stuff but im not a freak.and now aduldts are sayin im gothic to my parents.ok im not tryin to be.yes most of my clothes are black yes my jewelery is mainly chokers and big rings yes i love rock and metal and screamo and yes most of the people who dont hate me are goths emo or freaks but my best 2 friends are a preppy pink girl and a guy who is prep to. my parents took it all away all my stuff like that and wont let me see my goth emo and freak friends everything gone. but if i would tell my mom that thats just how i am shed freak out and get a therapist and hate me forever. I HATE MY LIFE im not gettin help like phsyciatrists or watever. i cant tell my mom im goth which i dont really think i am but if id write out my life ya i guess i am.my bff said its because i was a goody goody bitch all my life. he doesnt say it in a mean way but ya.even he says it!what do i tell my mom and i cant just sit down and talk to her...we dont get along since ive changed. what do i do she hates me now and took away everything.

Hon, I was a goody-good girl all my life. I'm almost 18 now and am suffering from an addiction problem (alcohol) and when I tried telling my parents, they did not believe me...They just thought that I'm too good to be doing something like that.
The whole point behind my 'story' is that your parents might still be seeing you as their goody-good daughter and it's just too difficult for them to accept the fact that you want to change. Goth, emo, nerd - whatever the stereotype - you're still their daughter. If you sit around blaming your mother for ruining your social life and dreams, you won't solve anything. Try reversing your actions. This tends to surprise parents and confuses them, BUT works all the time. Instead of shouting or screaming or arguing, say "Yes mom...you're right". Do things they'd never expect you to do - while you're still YOU as a 'goth' or whatever. This will make them see that no matter how different you may seem, you're still a good person and your friends aren't being a bad influence on you. They'll see that it's your choice to act that way and there's no peer pressure whatsoever.
If I were you, I'd write down little notes every night and put them on your mom's pillow. There's no way she'll avoid you that way - if you're afraid that she won't listen. Eventually she'll come around and see that taking your friends away from you was wrong.
Trust me ... I've been there. =)

Hope this helps.
Kay.

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Ok so about a month ago my friends mom called me asking if i had made her duaghter a myspace. I said yes because i thought she had meant *did* i make her one and she knew about that i mean i didnt make it with out her knowing and her mom "delted" it but its still there but any way so she started yelling at me and stuff and now well my BESTFRIEND isnt talking to me. My sister recently talked to her saying that it was a huge misunderstanding but she replied saying that people have said someone has been commenting them as her. . I havnt. So im on late at nite and i see that she has made herself or that could be someone else that has made her a myspace i was such in shock that my mouth was open for a about 5 minutes i finally added her seeing if she can be my firend. Im very upset though shes turned many people on me and i dont think shes supposed to have a myspace her mother said she wosnt supposed to and there she is online with a myspace. Should i tell my parents? should i show her mother getting her into truoble and suffering she has put me through? or should i just act like nothing happend and still talk to her? should i make new friends like new best friends? is what she did not a go back to friend too? i mean its not exactly a fight its really just a physco thing she thinks i did and there is nothing i can say to make her think i didnt. im very upset that shes turned most people on me i mean i dont know that for a fact but i will find out. it just hurts to see her doing that to me.

Well, if she still considers you her best friend, she would listen to you. I mean, she can't just, all of a sudden, stop talking to you and blame everything on you just because her mother misunderstood something...Let her know it's hurting you. If it takes your parents to convince her and her mother, then do it. You don't have anything to lose.
Remember, your conscience is clean, even if the whole world thinks that you're guilty when you know (but can't prove) your innocence.
Tell your friend that this isn't something that's worth putting your friendship to such a risk. It's technology...it comes and goes. Best friends don't. The space will be deleted then created again. Best friends aren't like that..once they're gone, there's no 'undo' button.
Hope you'll make the right decision and I hope this helps.

Best of luck,
Kay.

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I used to be able to sing "okay" But then I became a cheerleader for 7 years and now I sound like a man when I sing. I'm afraid to sing in the car to the radio or when I'm goofing off with my friends because I hate my voice and no one else likes to hear it. Is there anyway to make my voice any better? I love singing but I hate my voice!

Try singing in the shower as a practice - it really works. It's scientifically proven that you sing best if you sing somewhere where there's a lot of water and echo.
You can try singing along with your fave songs, and have 1 teaspoon of honey every morning. Honey makes your voice softer. I'm a musician, and my voice sucks. I don't think I'll ever have a good voice, even though I hit the notes and stuff right. My case is hopeless, but I know there's hope for you. Oh, and one more thing. Raw eggs. A buncha Arab artists do this. They drink raw eggs, with the yolk and all. It help a lot, but I wouldn't try it. Ew, slimy, I know.

Fa la la la la,
Kay

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Im a girl, so i already know i'll suck more at guitar then guys. But, i'd like to start getting into guitars because music is one of my passions. I have long slender fingers so will that be an advantage when playing guitar? Okay well my question is, i want to play the song "vermilion pt. 2" on guitar, and I think its acoustic. I looked up the tabs. It said acoustic i think. Well anyways i was looking up acoustic guitars on google, and i also looked up electric guitars. And acoustic guitars are ugly! So, whats the difference between acoustic and electric guitars? Electric looks easier, but i dont know much when it comes to guitar. Please let me know as much info as possible, from experience would be even better. Im a beginner (only played like a couple times and sucked). Thanks so much this is something i wanna get into. THANKS

Hey hon.
I'm a classical guitar player, and I've been playing for quite a while now. I'm a girl, like you, and music is my only source of oxygen. Anyway. It's SO much better if you start off with an acoustic guitar to learn the basics. I played the acoustic for like 7 years, then when I touched an electric one for the first time, I rocked like hell. The only difference between the acoustic and the electric one is the sound and the feel of the strings. Electric guitar strings are much thinner and sometimes cut your fingers, and the sound's much easier to control 'cause you've got the amp and all the other technological crap. You also use the pick while playing the electric guitar - which I find extremely difficult. I prefer using my fingers. It's like having 4 picks instead of one.
I seriously recommend that you start with an acoustic one first, just to learn the basics, then you can move on from there. Who cares if acoustic guitars are ugly? It's the talent and passion that counts, not the fact that your guitar's Easter yellow (mine is). Have you seen the Gibson acoustic guitars? They're gorgeous!

Anyway, hope I helped.
Rock on.

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