I am a wife and a mother of three grown sons. I live in New York and am an equestrian. Most of my free time is spent riding and caring for my horses now that my sons are out of the house.
I give down to earth advice, as I tell it like I see it...and I've seen alot.
Gender: Female
Location: New York
Member Since: January 17, 2009
Answers: 281
Last Update: September 11, 2011
Visitors: 18874
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I'm traveling cross country right now and I've noticed that in North Dakota and South Dakota, the unleaded plus gasoline is the cheapest and unleaded regular is more expensive.
Why is this?
This seems so strange and counterintuitive to me.
In every other state I've ever been to, unleaded regular is the cheapest and unleaded plus is more expensive.
What the heck is going on in the Dakotas to make them do it backwards? It's confusing! (link)
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Interesting. Perhaps unleaded plus is in greater demand? Can't think of any other reason other than shorter supply + high demand = higher prices.
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15/f
I'm in Florida for vacation, visiting my dad and step mom. The other day, we went out to the beach. Of course, Florida is very hot so I should have covered my entire body in sunblock. However, I only patted a little on my cheeks and nose :/ Yeah, a VERY stupid move on my part. Now, the sunblock I DID put on was spf 80 and worked extremely well. However, my ears, neck, and splotches of my face where sunblock was not applied are beet red. It hurts SO bad, worse then any sunburn I've ever endured :( and today, I noticed blisters on the tops of my ears! It looks so gross and hurts so much... I hate aloe vera but finally put some on my neck yesterday...so far it has done nothing, but I don't expect it to work in one day... My question is, is there anything at all that will either get rid of the sunburn soon or at least get rid of the blisters? I have to continuously wear my hair up because the blisters 'leak' (EW) onto my hair and it's disgusting... which, in turn, allows more sun to hit my neck...please help :( I'm currently just trying to stay out of the sun... which is pretty hard in the Sunshine State :/ thanks! I'll rate good answers! (link)
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You should see a doctor or even go to the emergency ward for treatment. Any form of severe burns can become infected and that is not what you want to happen! Infection can lead to disfigurement if you let it go.
If you don't go to the doctor, get an antibiotic ointment at the drug store and apply it. That will stop infection. Cold water will draw the heat out of your sunburn, so try cold compresses.
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I love to ride horses but where I ride is like 35 minutes away. My mom wants me to start riding at a closer farm, but I LOVE the place I go to now. What should I do? (link)
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If you're dependent on your mother for transportation, then you really don't have much of a choice but to ride where she is willing to go. Perhaps you could strike a deal with her and ride where she wants you to ride and maybe, once or twice a month, ride at your favorite place. Really, you can only try and negotiate, considering your not in a position to have your way.
I completely understand how you feel as I, myself, used to keep my horses at a barn that I just loved. It was great as far as the people and the arenas go. I left because I built my own farm, but I do miss the place and all the friends I made there, including my instructor.
You should be able to make friends and have a good ride at another stable, assuming that the people are nice (I know that isn't always the case) and the arena is decent(ditto).
Try to negotiate a deal with your mom. Do you have a birthday coming up? A nice gift would be a month of riding at your favorite barn.
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Okay, so I'm thirteen now.
Turned thirteen in April.
[Imma girl]
Before that [Birthday] I had been dating a couple of sixteen year old boys.
And my current boyfriend is sixteen.
Well, I was recently out with all of our friends, smoking and having fun.
And a friend of mine who was my age started hitting on me, and I laughed at him.
A boy five years older than me [18] hitted on me and later that night I was in his car doing bad things.
Yes, I am concerned that I cheated on my boyfriend, but not really the point of my question.
My real question would be,
If there was a reason [Meducal Condition maybe?]that I'm attracted to older guys or not.
I'm also not sure if it's just for an adreniline rush, 'cause I lovve doing bad things in the back of boys cars late at night.
And I'm desperate to find a reason. What I'm doing can legally be considered as rape and kidknapping. (link)
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Do you have a good relationship with your father? Seems to me you are looking for a father figure, an older man who you can be close to and that need is being acted upon in unwholesome ways.
An 18 year old can go to jail for violating you. He's considered a sex offender, a pedophile, and he knows it.
You do need therapy and you need self control or you will develop a pattern throughout your life of promiscuous sex. The fact that you're having sex at 13 is a major concern. Children don't have sex and shouldn't have sex. Talk to an adult who can help you.
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Me: 13/F. Him: 14/m.
Okay well here's the background info: He has always gone to my school so I've known him practically my whole life, but I only started falling for him last year. I REALLY fell for him. It was last summer. We began talking all of the time and hanging out a lot too because our groups are pretty tight. We became really close, and then school started. I was certain that once school started we would drift apart. Wrong. We only spent more time together and grew closer. We both knew we liked eachother but decided we wouldn't date bcuz we didn't think we were mature enough to handle a relationship. But we still had feelings for eachother. I would get jelous like a girlfriend even though I wasn't one. And he would get protective like a boyfriend even though he wasn't one. And yet we still talked to eachother more than the "real couples" in our grade. Then, we found he would be moving at the end of the year that's when it was decided there would be absolutly no dating. I didnt need to date a boy when 1. I am only 13 and 2. He would be moving. No thank you. He agreed. Well again... That still didnt make the feelings go away which brings me to present day...
He is starting to try and make a boyfriend girlfriend relationship and I keep having to tell him (as much as I dont want to) no. I still really like him, I always have, but I'm trying so hard not to. Hes leaving soon, I know I have to stop liking him, but I can't. Especially when hes doing all he can to make sure I dont. He asked me on a date the other day and as much as it killed me I told him no. I am trying to get over him! He thinks I dont like him anymore. But I do. And I'm so confused. Is this the right thing to do? My friends tell me I should try to get as much of him as I can before he leaves but they dont understand how much more painful doing that will make it when he is gone. Does anyone understand this? The more I continue to open up to him, the more its going to hurt. Ugh its killing me. I dont know what to do or if what I am doing is right. I dont want to hurt him but I dont want to get hurt either. Can't he see that I'm trying to do us bot. a favor?? Help please! What do you think I should do? (link)
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Maybe he can't see that you are trying to do the mature thing, for both of you. Perhaps you will have to tell him point blank how you feel about him and how you feel about the whole situation. He's not a mind reader.
You seem to have something very special with this boy, as young as you both are, you have a special bond that doesn't come along very often, even in the adult world.
That said, I would talk it out with him. Explain to him that his moving will just cause heartache. Perhaps the two of you could keep in touch via telephone or email. Keep it on a friendship basis and if you still feel the same in a few years....you may have the makings of a great relationship.
I went to school (long, long ago) with a girl and a boy who used to be very close. They were your age. All through school and after graduation they were close. They ended up married and very happily. They are now in their late 50's. It can happen.
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Would I lose weight just as fast if I did south beach instead of atkins or is atkins faster? Thank you. (link)
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If you follow any diet plan, you will lose weight because they all require you to cut calories, whether they are fat calories or carbs does not matter. Calories are calories and you must lower your caloric intake to lose weight.
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Can anybody give me a link (or more)
To a completely FREE FULL photoshop download
No trials
Free
Downloadable
Thanks (:
I've heard theres a free download out there somewhere
I can just never find one
And and don't forget
NO TRIALS
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Photoshop is not free and it is against piracy laws to steal it. That's why no one is giving you a link. They may know where to get it free, but, they ain't talkin'.
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Well I like to drink for fun sometimes and when i was talking to someone they said that hard liquor speeds up the aging process. So I was just wondering if that is true or not. Cause I'm drinking Bacardi 151 and Absolute and yea. (link)
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You'd better believe it does! That is, if you frequently. I've witnessed many a drinker, over a 15-20 span, age badly. You may get away with it for 10 years, but, wham!, it'll catch up with you. Look at a heavy drinkers face. Their noses turn red and bulbous, they have wrinkles, puffy faces and leathery looking, blemished skin. Beer and wine will do it to you, too, if you drink enough of it.
My sister drinks (wine)and always has. We both have grown children. She is 4 years younger than me, but everyone thinks she's my older sister. I never drink and never have, except for a glass or two of wine at Christmas. When I tell people my age, they can't believe it. I can easily pass for 10-15 years younger than I am. Don't do it, it's not worth it!
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Okay well I like this guy and he likes me but for various reasons (age being one of them) we have decided that we dont want to date. See, he is 14/m and I am 13/f and we have both agreed that we just aren't mature enough for all of that. But, we still like eachother... A lot. It can get kind of messy when it comes to other genders though. Neither of us are interested in anyone else, but I can get a little jelous and he can be kind of protective, but it just kind of... works out. I dont know, tell me if I'm setting myself up for disaster...
Anyway, that's not the point. That's kind of background info. The problem is, he's INCREDIBLY stubborn. I'm kind of... controling I guess? Haha not really but I am definitely not used to such a difficult boy. He believes that "the male is in charge" and he's NEVER disrespectful, just very obstinate. I have to go to extreme lengths to convince him to do anything. And I promise I'm not being one of those annoying girls who thinks boys should do whstever they tell them, he is honestly way too stubborn. It drives me crazy! As I said, not disrespectful, but hes so stubborn I feel like hes missing out on all kinds of things, and I just want to be able to convince him to do things. I've tried everything in the book, making puppy faces, saying "pretty please?", the whole shebang, and all I get is "sorry baby, no means no". Any help? Steadegies? I really like him, but this the only bump, and I know I can't change him but I need advice on how to deal with it or how to help myself get over it. Are there any perks? Help!
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Well...this is a difficult one. Speaking from years of experience, guys don't change, they only become more of what they already are. If he's stubborn now, he'll be impossible years down the road, if he doesn't get a wake up call from someone he respects (girlfriend, mother, father, authority figure). I'm willing to bet his father is the same way.
On the other hand, some people do have a light bulb moment on their own and change their ways, but, more often than not, they don't.
That said, he is still very young and could change just as a matter of maturing and coming to the conclusion that his behavior isn't all that. Right now, he is trying to prove who he is to the world. He is in the midst of establishing his manhood and boys do act incredibly stupid around that age. So do girls. Both sexes are trying to figure out and establish their place in the world. This age group is going from being mama's child to becoming independent and showing they don't have a need for mommy and daddy. So...the peacock starts strutting his feathers in front of the girls and the guys. He's showing the girls he's a man and showing the guys he's high up on the food chain.
You have to decide if it's something you can accept or not. If you find it difficult to accept, you'll have to confront him on the issue (no puppy faces) and tell him you'd like him to be more flexible as you are the other half of the friendship and he should value your friendship. If he refuses, then you'll either have to accept it or tell him you are hurt to find out that he doesn't value your input into the relationship.
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i have bn dating my cousin for 1 year and a month and i luv him i guess i should have not asked for advise but we love each other we are already planing our feauture and im actually really excited
i am the happiest girl ever even though i am dating my own cousin
i know 4 a fact that 4 nothing in this world would he give me up or 4 any1 thats the main reason y I love him
neways we are happy and we are old enough too no what we r doing im 17 and he is 19
i no that ya have gone thew thinking about dating like me but you dont have the nerves to admit it but it ok
so if you want advise 4rm me do what you think is right even though pe0ple w0nt except you 4 who you are!
love ya
;! (link)
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I didn't see your first question or the answers, but the primary reason against marrying a close relative is the gene pool. If you both have a recessive gene, the odds are increased that your children will have a disease, or even a deformity. Families that used to inbreed (there were a lot of them back in the day) used to pass down problems to their offspring. Since they kept having relationships within the family throughout generations, these problems were passed along throughout the generations. Look at the story of the Fugates aka the Blue Fugates.
http://www.rootsweb.ancestry.com/~kyperry3/Blue_Fugates_Troublesome_Creek.html
That said, I'm sure you and your family aren't going to be inbreeding generation after generation, but it's still worth considering the risks to your children, which is why the practice has been done away with in this country.
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We are divocred last 8 years she got married again and she ignored me badly. now Iam clean with my addction problem and last 2 years she was seperated and divorced from the husband we have 02 kids we both dating every day after i sleep with her i get so mad and start fighting and go away after one day Ineed her iwant to marry her and live happy life with my kids she want the same please help us. I never had any relation ship with any body after her.
HELPLESS FATHER
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8 years is a long time to be divorced. I'm very surprised she is back with you. Very surprised. It's quite rare for a woman to go back to her ex, on any level, especially after such a long time. I think she must really care for you.
Why do you get angry with her? Are you jealous that she was remarried while you were out of the picture? You must be more understanding. She had a life to live and while you were getting clean, you may not have noticed time flying by, but I assure you, she did.
You need to get in touch with your emotions and deal with the reason you had an addiction in the first place and learn how you can get on with life, putting the past behind you. If you don't you will blow it the second time around.
That said, I congratulate you on your success in beating your addiction! That is a milestone. Even if things don't work out with your ex, you will have quite a choice of women. Clean men, with the strength to do what you did, are hard to come by.
Lighten up and enjoy life!
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We're 21/f (me) and 23/m (him).
This is kinda random, I'm just looking for a few responses.
My guy and I have been through some hard times. He's had both physical and psychological difficulties, and he's just starting to come out of them. I'm having financial difficulties, but I decided that I was going to buy a pair of lawn seats for the Incubus concert coming up in July.
My initial idea was to tell him on the day of the concert to be ready by like, six or so, and that I had a surprise for him, then blindfold him when he gets into my car and drive him to the concert.
Problem is, it's about three weeks after his birthday...Because I'm so financially stretched right now, I don't think I'm gonna be able to actually get something to give him on that day. I've made him presents in the past - stuffed animals, portraits of his deceased cats, etc - but I'm running out of ideas now. We've been on and off for nearly four years. We just got back together in February, and our relationship is amazing for the first time.
Anyway, if I go through with my plan to blindfold and totally surprise him, I risk looking like a bitch for three weeks. I thought about giving him his ticket for his birthday, but the blindfolding thing sounds like it'd be a much better present.
I dunno. How would you react if your girlfriend of four years gave you nothing on your birthday? What if she told you you had to wait three weeks for your present instead?
Ideas? (link)
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Give him a little note card that says..."To receive your gift, redeem in one week."
When the week is over he redeems his card...you give him a blindfold in a small box with another note, that says..."More to come, redeem in one week."
Week two, he redeems his card and gets another little gift (cd of the band your going to see?) with another card with instructions....
Instructions: Play cd and think of me. Redeem this card next week. Warning! There will be no redemption without blindfold!
Anyway, that's my idea.
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15/F
Okay so theres this guy that i actually really really like.
hes one of those guys who just seems to have that something over you?you know where you just cant say no or resist them. maybe thats just me i dont know but anyway..
the problem is just that.. okay so he lives in a different county to me (like states in the US although not as a far about an hour or so away)and we met through our dads they are both in the army and through a sports club too.
and we kissed a couple of times and we would text alot. but sometimes he would text me non stop then suddenly not and we wouldnt talk for weeks. then suddenly he would text me being all flirty again.
We both know we could never work out as a couple because of the distance its more of a hook up thing when we see each other if either of us arent with somebody.
so weve got this thing coming up next weekend and he said to my friend "im gonna get with Jess this weekend"
this annoyed me in a way because its like he knows im there to have if he wants and making me out to be easy,and i hate him thinking that makes me feel used in a way.
but on the other hand like i said hes just got the iristable factor and even if we were to hook up again we would both be just in it for like fun if thats the right word you know nothing serious.
I dont know if i should or not though im kind of in two frames of mind does anyone have any advice or opinions on what they think i should do?or what youd do if you were me =]
any help is really apriciated sorry its long!
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You're only 15. You should NOT hook up with this guy, or any guy. He does sound like a user. If you don't resist, you will feel bad about yourself when he doesn't call anymore, after the fact. Or he may call again just to get more of what he wants.
Personally, guys like that give me the creeps, but, it's your call. The best way to test where a relationship is going is to not have sex for the first year. You'll know whose in it for the long haul and who's not.
I'm so happy to hear you are smart enough not to take this that far (sex). Sorry for the misunderstanding, but, I've read so many questions on this site about girls who are doing all kinds of sexual things at such a young age that I automatically assumed that was what your question was about. You are a girl with a head on your shoulders and you don't need this guy. He sounds like he's just playing games. There are people out there (boys and girls) who love to play the game as long as they don't get caught. It's the game that excites them. Stay away from that type. Wait for the right guy who calls you and can't wait to call you again. You'll find him someday.
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NOTE: IM IN A RUSH SO SOME OF THE GRAMMER AND WORDS MAY NOT MAKE SINCE..and MIGHT BE STRAIGHT RUBBISH
im a 10th grader and the talk around school in my grade is who has had sex or not.. i mean its not a big deal but like...i wanna know who has or not..wel me and my best friend jesse..know alot of people who have and they tell us in secret..but i always tell him even though i promised that person i wouldnt say anything..and i thought he told me everyone he knows..but latley theres this other girl he hangs out with and me and her are cool too..but she told him that her and her boyfriend have and he never told me.. i asked him if they have a couple of times because they are always just there..kissing..he always says no..well like 3 days ago two of my other best friends told me that she had told them on two different occasions and one of them said that the girl had told him too...so i was in shock that he never told me..and i asked him about it the next period and he said he didnt know..and i just walked away because i knew he was lying..and well i just said..i see how you are..and he said fine dont believe me..well i let it go and today while i was on the phone with him..i told him just to tell me if he knew because i already knew they have..he still said no..and played like he didnt know for like 10 mins...finally he confused and said he did know but he just didnt want to tell me.. I find him as my best friend and i tell him everything i know..i mean everything..and i just feel like he isnt telling me everything..
what should i do..should i stop telling him my secrets..what do you think..and
ps
he lies like ALOT so yeah..idk if i should trust him anymore
19 minutes ago
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If you are being told these things in secret, doesn't that mean someone is trusting you to keep your mouth shut? You made a promise to keep a secret and you broke it. YOU lied. You can't very well condemn Jesse for lying when you're a liar. Isn't that the pot calling the kettle black?
Jesse doesn't spread gossip, from what I can gather. He does keep his mouth shut. I guess to him a secret is a secret. You are way too nosy for your own good. Who sleeps with who is none of your business. I wonder who is talking about you behind your back?
Find something better to occupy your time.
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If i mix brownie batter with cake batter and put the exact ingrediants that each package tells me to put all in a big bowl and then bake it...is it going to swell as high as a cake or is it going to be somewhere in between and will it turn out well. thank you. if you have a recipe i will be glad to accept it. (link)
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Brownies are more dense than cake, so theoretically, it should thicken the consistency of the cake, somewhat. You'll probably have a denser cake. I believe the cake will rise to it's normal cake height. Nevertheless, you must do the experiment to see if the theory is true. Try it! If it doesn't work out well, then you'll know. However, you may be pleasantly surprised. What have you got to lose? You may discover a new recipe!
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my ex and i broke up. his mom came to my work when i wasnt working and asked about me. she asked about my accident (i fell off a horse) and she asked how i was doing after the break up. i just want to write her a thank you card, what should i write in it? (link)
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She's concerned about you and probably fond of you. Just thank her and tell her you really appreciate her concern for you and that you'd like to stay in touch, despite the break up. Tell her that your relationship with her has nothing to do with her son.
Of course, this is assuming you want to stay in touch. If not, just thank her for her concern.
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What is the difference between Spanish Guitar and Flaminco Guitar? Or is there one? Thank you. (link)
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http://www.geocities.com/BourbonStreet/Canal/2601/vinguitarflamencoguitaren.html
You are asking...what are the differences between Spanish and Flamenco guitar techniques and strumming patterns. I think if you studied the two, in depth, as a master guitarist would, then you would see a world of difference. Similar to the difference between country music and bluegrass and zydeco. To the discerning ear, there is a huge difference. To the uneducated ear, not so much.
The noticeable difference would be in the educated or uneducated ear of the listener. In other words, if you played Spanish Guitar for your mother, and told her it was Flamenco, she'd give you a standing ovation!
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I have been really interested in OBE's or Out of Body Experiences. I really want to have one and have read information on it. Does anyone know a way to increase your chances or even possibly have an OBE? And If you have had/have an OBE what was or is the experience like in detail. Also could OBE's be dangerous? (link)
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My guess is...if you're having an out of body experience, then you're either dead or very close to it and death is "dangerous"!
Don't attempt it! You may not come back and may not enjoy the trip.
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My friend went to jail , but there is a injuction thats saying I cant talk to him till im 18 cause hes overage . Do I have to wait till im 18 inorder to write him a letter or anything ? (link)
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I don't know if you could go to jail for writing to him, but he could get into real trouble for communicating with you, a minor. As for security checking...I do believe they have the option of reading his mail if they suspect any possible trouble.
I don't know how old you are or why he is in jail, but if you have a heart for him, you wouldn't try and communicate with him. He's, obviously, in enough trouble already. You don't need to add to his grief.
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So, many jobs these days are making you do a credit check online. They'll recommend you a website, and you fill it out. Then almost at the end they tell you they will put you on a free subscription for something and then charge you monthly of like 40 dollars.
My question is, are there any completely free credit check websites where there are no hidden fees? I googled so many but they all charge you, even when they claim "it's all free."
Any recommended websites would help. Thanks. (link)
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http://www.transunion.com/corporate/personal/creditTools/freeCreditReport.page
The above link is from Trans Union, a credit reporting agency. By law, you can get your credit report for free, once a year. You don't have to sign up for anything. They must give you a free report. Experian is another credit reporting agency.
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