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**** I've been gone quite a long time. However I'm still breathing though it's touch and go. Don't expect me to answer or check in much. ****

Welcome to the junkdrawer that is my brain! I know something about many things, and I if I don't know it, I admit that I don't know. That I am constantly finding things I know nothing about and correcting that ignorance keeps me busy and happy. More junk for the drawer.

I love and have experience with many types of animals, including the human. I don't offend easy and I am generally cynical and a smart-butt. I love to drive, read, work on the computer and I spend WAY too much time watching Anime and bidding on ebay.

advice

My BF and I have been going out for a month. And we kiss and W/E outside of school, but past couple of days we have been doing little kisses after 4th. we both feel kinda uncomfortable cause all my friends go AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW really loudly n obviously when we do and its really annoying! i've told them to stop but they dont! have can i make them?! i rate ^^

Take the kiss to a deeper level, you'll never notice them.

well..i just started a job as a hostess and i have to wear black pants and a white shirt.
i was wondering where would be the best place to look for these? somewhere cheap and stylish

A thrift store. Don't laugh or just get disgusted. My sister shops thrift store almost religiously. She finds Ralph Lauren, Calvin Klein, and so many other designer names I could spend all day writing them. Lots of the clothes are new or hardly worn. With a good eye you can dress like a person with money to burn. I know my sister's wardrobe is huge and all of her co-workers are envious of her finds. If this does not appleal to you, try Old Navy. Their prices seem very reasonable and the clothes are cute.

well its difficult being on my feet for 6 1/2 hours at a time while im at work. i have to dress nicely...so i need shoes that look nice as well. what would be the best type of shoes to fit this discription?

Easy Spirit makes a dress shoe for women. You didn't specify ,but men's shoes are generally more comfy anyway. Also you can go to a podietrist. They should be able to recomend a good shoe or mold you for supportive inserts. My doc just gave up and sent me to work with a prescription to wear only tennis shoes to work (with the inserts too). Due to the American's with Disabilities act, your boss would have no choice but to allow you to wear good support shoes and not complain. Although I would prefer wearing the Easy Spirits. It feels odd wearing black tennis shoes with a dress. Hope you find the perfect shoe!

what is a crash diet? i watched true life tonight adn this girl name amber was on there and she was on a crash diet. she lost alot of weight in a short amount of time. i wanna go on a crash diet. what do i do on a crash diet?

Crash diets are extremely unheathy, plus they don't keep the weight off. This Amber will gain all she has lost plus 20 to 30 pounds more when she stops starving herself. The reason is that your body when it thinks it is being starved stores everything you eat that doesn't go directly to maintaining your life. Crash dieting slows your ability to burn the calories you take in, your body then stores everything else in fat that you don't burn. These diets are what cause the yo-yo effect. Lose weight then gain more than you lost, then starve to lose that weight only to gain even more the next time. The only way to truely lose the weight and keep it off is not with a diet, but a life style change. You have to commit yourself to a healthy way of eating and exercise that will slowly take of the extra pound then allow you to maintain your ideal weight without the starve and gain cycle. Good Health!

ok say you go get tested and they say you have herpes, how will they know if the herpes was from giving someone head or if it was from air borne herpes(which is when u can get it just by breathing in the air) or if it was from switching saliva. like by sharing drinks.. whats the difference.. and if u go get tested and you have herpes how can they tell which one you have..????

IT really doesn't matter in a medical sense, how you got the virus. Niether Type 1 or Type 2 are curable. I doubt your doctor will do more than ask just to see if you many be at risk for other sexually transmitted nasties.

What is herpes?
I've heard of it but I never really knew what it was;
and how do you get it?

Herpes is a virus in the same family of viruses as Chicken Pox. However unlike Chicken Pox, Herpes only goes away to lay dormant for awhile. It comes back causeing painful open sores that can pass the virus to others by touch transfer. Cold sores are a mild form of Herpes, though they get worse, larger and more painful with age. Some people are born with the virus, from their mother or father. Most get it by kissing someone with a cold sore or having sex with someone with genital Herpes. Condoms arenot terribly likely to keep you from getting Herpes, because the sores are not just located in the vagina or on the phallus. Plus the condition is painful. I doubt a person with a flairup would be interested in having sex. Aslo it is possible to contract the virus even if the person is not having a flairup, though much less likely. I hope this was the information you wanted. Health.

does anyone know how to get rid of disscharge...its so gross i know but i really want to be sexually active but its holding me back

This is why the douche was created. IT is not healthy to use them too often. They disrupt the natural balance of your system, because discharge IS a normal fact of life and is very important to female health. If you feel yours are too heavy or smell funny or have a strange color, you need to see a gynocologist. Often signs of illness can be first noticed in female discharge. Other than this, drink lots of water and make sure to wash your toys. Luck!

I walked in on my very hot teacher and his wife going at it in the janitors closet one day because i was helping my principal for community service points clean her office. when i came back she asked me what was wrong cause i was mortified. seriously. this is no joke. so i dont know if i should tell her or not. but when i went to class the next day i felt very awkward and i could tell my teacher did too. so later him and his wife saw me walking down the hall and asked me if i wanted to join them at their house, as long as i didn't tell. should i tell the principal or should i join them? seriously. anyboyd that just wants to laugh at me can screw off because this is a very serious problem and i'm really stuck andi dont know what to do. please help

There is nothing wrong with a man and his wife having sex. Yes, they chose a pretty undesirable spot, but that is the chance they took. Now, I wouldn't bother telling anyone, but I DEFINATELY wouldn't go to their house. Why should you go? It seems inappropriate for the teach to ask. He could get in trouble for screwing his wife at work, but that's his business. Just tell him you have no intention of telling anyone. Tell him the truth that you are terribly embarrassed and just want to forget the whole thing. Then, do forget the whole thing. Never mention it again. But that bit about inviting you to their house bugs me. What the hell do they want? It could be nothing, but I don't like how they are trying to handle you. Don't be caught alone with those people. It could be they like people to watch. That could be one reason they were doing it in the closet in the first place. Some people are like that. They might just want to explain. They might want you to join in the sex act. There is no way of telling and no reason you should give them the chance. If it's just an explaination though I can give you that. There is a special excitement to having sex where you may be discovered. It adds to the pleasure somehow. I doubt they expected to be caught. Try not to worry to much over all this. Just keep you mouth shut and everything should be fine.

i told my friend i fancy this boy and now she flirts with him all the time. but only scince i told her i did fancy him. shes having a party and is inviting him and me and says she going to set her best friend up with him and then says whats wrong like she doesn't know. i really hate her when she is like this please help me...

This is the kind of petty, back-biting, pissy assed shite I hated in school. It is called one-upmanship. You have an interest in a guy, she takes closer notice and desides you're not half wrong. She starts flirting cuz you don't. One up. She has beaten you to flirting with him. Next one up, she invited him to a party. Now ahe is TRYING to upset you by claiming in not so many words, that 1. she doesn't want him and 2. She's GIVING him to another girl. This can mean one of two things. She's a real bitch and is trying to hurt you, or she's a good friend and has been trying to get you off your ass to fight for this guy's attention. You know her, I don't. Which would be more likely? Either way, you should take the opportunity at the party to flirt and talk to the guy. Good luck!

My Boyfriend and I broke up a couple of days ago and i still cant stop crying. Any tips on getting the pain to go away??

Keep crying until the tears are gone. By then you'll be able to think again. Go out with friends and do things that would normally make you happy, but remember you were crying because you greived for the end of a relationship. There is nothing wrong with that. It is a healthy means of dealing with pain. Allow yourself time for pity and tears, then go on with your life. Without that time of adjustment you will just get obsessed over the past. Give yourself some time even when you start normal activities again. You'll heal, but it takes time. Luck and love!

hi there does any one know anything about pearl powder

I know it is in several Chinese face creams and is said to be a secret to young healthy skin. Other than that I only know that a pearl is created from the secretions of an oyster to protect itself from the irritation of a foreign object stuck in its shell. What those secretions are and how good they are for the skin I have no clue. You may look up Pearl Cream on the net. I think Suzie Wong, a Chinese actress of great beauty used to advertise it in the states years ago.

Does anyone know of any movies with dancing in them?
Apart from musicals, I think I've watched enough musicals to last me a life time.

It doesn't matter what type of dancing it is I just need dancing in it.

White Nights
Save the Last Dance
Flash Dance
Breakin'
A Chorus Line
Singing in the Rain(only partially a musical)
Tap
Fame
There is an incredible dance scene in The Mask of Zorro with Antonio Bandarras (Worth the whole movie which isn't half bad either.)
Strickly Ballroom (awesome)
Lambada - The Forbidden Dance
Dirty Dancing
Dirty Dancing 2 (haven't seen this one, but...)
Lots more I don't have time to list. This should give you a good start.

i really like this boy, and my friend found out that i liked him, and she's being stirring rumours that arent true and she found out that the boy i like has alot of common things with me and she is trying to be his perfect image which is me i recently found out that they are going out what should i do
i dont understand why she didnt want to tell me to see how i feel about it
and now the person that i found out that she thinks there is something going on between me and him

i really don't kow what to do

Well, first off. She is NOT a friend. Friends do not go behind your back spreading rumours. Friends do not find out you like a guy and set out to take him from you. Friends care and will not do things to purposely hurt you. She did all of this on purpose. She planned and plotted and has now gone out with the guy. She knows she's not what this guy thinks she is. THAT is why she is paranoid that you and him are together behinde her back. I say find out who your REAL friends are. Guys are notoriously stupid when it comes to women, so I'm not sure if you'll be able to cold bloodedly take him away from her. Even though she isn't a friend though, there is an old saying that makes great practical sense. "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer." This basically means don't let her realize you know she's not your friend. Keep her in your circle to be able to keep a close eye on her actions and to know what she's saying. This is a difficult thing to do. Some people can't manage it, if you can't don't worry too much. Just drop her and make sure you are the truest friend to the people around you that you can be. Loyalty does count in this world. As for the guy, hopefully he'll learn quickly what a fake she is and dump her. Stay close to him, be nice. Flirt a little, but don't bad mouth her. Bad mouthing tends to make guys stubborn and will work against you rather than for you. This is a tough situationa dn I wish you luck!

So it seems no one cares that its right to wait untill marrage to have sex (in the chrsitian religon) and now to me it seems seroiusly wrong, but later on it probubaly wont. I just wanted to know at what age do most people lose it? Since im in 7th now, and next year is supposibly the year everyone starts. Most likly the guy I marry wont be a virgin, right? 5's for anyone who is reasonable.

I cared, and though I didn't exactly wait for marriage I waited for the one guy I wanted to marry. (I also married him.) This does not mean I never experimented or that I didn't like kissing and holding hands and hugs. There is no reason to be cold. Just don't do anything you don't want to do. No the man you marry will probably not be a virgin. For some reason most guys seem to think it reflects poorly on themselves not to have sex. They have very little self esteem in this area. It is possible to find a male virgin to marry though. I have a friend who has and it is amazing how close they are without the pressure to put out. I envy that relationship. Luck and love. Just remember there is no reason to rush things.

I used to live with my dad (my parents are divorced) I was with him from age 6 until I was 9 all those three years he would moleste me, rape me, and beat me. I didn't really understand what was happening because I was so young. Well one day my teacher noticed that I couldn't really move because I was in so much pain. They asked me some questions but I was afraid to tell them because I didn't want to get hit again. They knew something was going on and they sent me to go live with my mom. I live with my mom for 4 years and it was exactly the same as living with my dad except this time it was her boyfriends who would rape me and she would just beat me. I started doing drugs when I was 11 and I thought it was the greatest thing in the world. It kept me out of my mom's house and with my friends and I actually felt like I belonged. When I was 13 I ran away from home and things got really bad I got really deep into drugs and I ended somwhere where I had to do things that I regret doing in order to get a fix. I hate the person that I was and I've been trying to straighten out with the help of my friend. Things were going pretty good for a couple months but then social services found out about what was going on and sent me here. I've been to 7 different foster homes in 6 different states and evertime either my foster "brother" or "father" beat me or rape me or both. I'm in one of those places again and I don't know what to do anymore I've been trying soo hard to make things work. I really have.

My question is do you have any idea why this always happens to me? I feel like it's my fault, is it my fault? I'm scared to keep moving around each time it gets worse. Is it normal for me to want to do drugse even though I know it's wrong? And is there any thing in the law that will let me go live with my friend or anywhere where i won't have to go through this??

I'm sorry that this is long but I really need help and I don't know what to do anymore. Please help me.

Until you are 18 the state is respocible for your care. That they are assigning you to terrible homes is NOT your fault. That you were ever put into this situation is NOT your fault. The fault belongs to your mother and father. They were the ones who brought horror into your life. You have done nothing but try to survive in any way that you can. Drugs rape and beat just as bad people do. The temptation is that drugs offer you the lie of peace while they kill you slowly from the inside and you blame yourself for the horrors that you must perform to keep that illusion in place. Trust me sweetheart, people with far less reason than you have fallen into the trap drugs offer. That you have come this far is a testament to your personal strength and character. I have never been in the foster care system. I am sure there are excellent homes out there somewhere, but I have no doubt your situation is terrible. Far too many people use the system to find victims to abuse and they learn that system well enough to hide their crimes.. Because that's what this abuse is, it is a crime. A crime against you, the system, and humanity. IF you can use the internet for research, type in foster care abuse and your state. There should be numbers of information for you. If you can't, just let me know what state you live in and I will be happy to look the info up for you. I can't think of anything more I can do. You are in a hell that you did not create. NEVER blame yourself for all of this. Bad things happen to good people all the time. It is the way of the world. I don't understand it, though I do know that the desire to feel power through violence upon others is a weak willed man's means of hiding his own weakness from himself. Please write me back. I'll do what little I can. Big hug! Stay as strong as you have been so far. You are a survivor. You are still here.

Okay here's the story, me and my bf have been together for over two years now and it's getting to the time where I need to decide on a college there this is one college that I was looking into because it had a an excellent animal sciences program but it isn't exactly close and I would have to live on campus. He told me that he couldn't handle me being far away and if I left that he would break up with me. Now there is a school closer to us that I could go to but then I'd have to pick a different major. So wait I am trying to figure out is should I go or should I stay?

You can not allow him to choose your future. Comprimize is essential in any solid relationship, but to give up your dreams because he's being selfish is no way to live. If you change majors for him and you eventually marry, you WILL resent him for the rest of your life. You will always wonder what if, and bitterness will eventually distroy your relationship and marriage. If children are involved by this time there will be untold suffering for them as well. Now, if you choose to change majors and you break up, you will be extremely bitter and angry at yourself as well as him. If you choose to follow your dreams and he comes to realize what a moronicly selfish thing he was asking of you and stays with you AND faithful then you could have a great relationship that will grow closer as the years pass. If he dumps you for doing what you have always dreamed of and that is important to you, then I am sorry to say that you have wasted two years with a complete loser and are far better off with him out of your life. There will be a man out there who will love and respect you enough to support your dreams as you are willing to support his. Life is not easy. Sometimes what we have is not what we need, and sometimes it is what we need but must to be fought for to be kept healthy and worthwile. Hope this insight helps, it comes from more experience than you could ever imagine.

how do you know if a girl is lying to you like when you ask them out and they say something. How do you know if they are telling the truth or lying to make you feel better??

Just accept a turn down at face value. It is done with good intentions and is meant to preserve your ego. If you start second guessing everything a girl says to you, you'll never learn to trust one. I know it doesn't set well to think someone may not be telling you the truth, but which would you rather hear? "I'm sorry I already have plans for that night." or "No way. If you try to kiss me I'll puke." Plus some people not just girls lie better than others. Unless you plan to strap every chick you are interested in into a chair and grill her under the electrodes of a lie detector, you'll never know for sure. Don't be so paranoid. Live life!

when i have got my hands wet my nails go almost transparent and take a while to go back to the normal colour. does this mean i have a calcium defiency? if so what can i add to my diet to improve this as i already eat a fair amount of cheese and drink milk in my tea.

This is fairly normal, nails and hair are made or karetin. Eat more carrots and take a geletin suppliment like Nutra Joint.

I'm 14, and a girl. We just found out that my grandpa had cancer about a month and a half ago. We knew something was wrong but we weren't sure what. It was too bad when we found out so the medicine didn't do anyghing. Hes slowly getting worse and can die any day now. My whole family is devestated and sometimes i just can't take the feeling i get inside. =( My boyfriends grandma had an anurism and then 3 strokes, and now she's dying too, and it's going to happen the same way (go into a comma and stop breathing) and around the same time. We live in jersey but his grandmas in florida so he just went down there. I don't have him with me when i need him most and im just really upset. My cousin on my other side of the family doesn't care about anything that's happening to me, and he's hated me for the past 9 monthes because im going out with his friend! He won't even talk to me now, and he even has my step-sister on his side. I'm just really upset and i don't know what to do. Sometimes i just break down and cry which sort of helps, but is there anything else? Please help me, Im soo upset! Thank you

All you can do is spend as much time as possible with your grandfather while he's still here. I lost my grnadpa to cancer several years ago, and while the sympathy and understanding of others helped, nothing was as good as the time I spent with him. They say everyone dies alone, but they also grieve alone too. Your cousin is hurting, and being jelous of loosing some of his friend's attention to you has made him petty. Ignore him as best you can. He seems to be lashing out in pain more than not caring how you feel. Some people just feel better if they can make someone feel worse than they do. I wish I could give you more support. Big hug!

I live in a dorm and I am very happy with the way I have it set up. But, I'll be living at home this summer. I would like to fix up my room. I have a pretty good idea of how everything will end up, save for one thing.

Petunia is my beloved, albeit large stereo. The speakers about three feet tall and eight inches wide. The main section, which has two casette players, a clock radio, a record player, and a shelf for LPs, is about four feet tall and a foot and a half wide. It is ugly wood paneling. My room is a light peach color and most of the wood in my room is a dark, reddish oak but Petunia is a light yellowy brown, almost mustard colored, with black "grain". Horrible late 70's fake wood. If it wasn't for the record player, Petunia would still be in a yard sale, so I can't just get rid of it. It's also very fragile. What can I do to beautify Petunia? Something inexpensive and preferably impermament in case I need to remove the treatment when I finally get my own apartment (in three years probably). Keep in mind that I can put anything on top of the speakers but not the record player.

Since you want a temporary solution look at wrapping paper. I used it to cover things in my room and make tables and shelving out of cardboard boxes. Hallmark cards has some wonderful solids and prints in heavy weight paper. I used one that looked like real malichite stone and another of matte black. It looked great.

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