I love helping people out and I feel great giving advice to people out there I don't even know. It gives me great personal satisfaction knowing that the answers I give are pretty damn good. I have a cheery personality and I like art and music. I am not religious, but have a clear view of spirituality. I will never grow up completely, I clearly remember what it's like to be a teen, but now I have a much better perspective on how to get through it all because let me tell you, I have BEEN through it all. Glad to help any way I can...
Gender: Female
Location: New Hampshire
Occupation: homemaker:mommy
Age: 24
Member Since: October 18, 2004
Answers: 132
Last Update: January 9, 2005
Visitors: 9522
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hi dus neone no ne good sights u can go to that talk about dealing w/ rape?
thnx (link)
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Yeah, I know the perfect place: it's called R.A.I.N.N.
It was founded by Tori Amos (singer, songwriter, pianist). R.A.I.N.N. stands for
1.Rape
2.Abuse
3.Incest
4.National
5.Network
Also, check out her music if you never have, it's really good. She has a song about being raped (she was raped one night after one of her concert shows back in like '85 or something). The song is called 'Me and a Gun.' It's on her 1991 Little Earthquakes album. Try going to google, advanced search, and type in R.A.I.N.N. I don't know the exact address. Then go to google and click on images, advanced search and type tori amos to see what she looks like. Good luck!!
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well today in lunch my boyfriend, i duno if hes really my boyfriend, but im guessing he is cuz he told me he wass. i can't trust him AT ALL. he took my purse from me and took my cellphone and wouldn't give it back. i thought he was goin to do something to it, like break it or call people n stuff. so i turned him in, because hes like that he would do something bad to my phone, and that phone was so expensive. my friends say i did the right thing. but would u hate me? he got 3 days suspension by the way. (link)
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Seriously, too bad for him, he's an ass! Yes, you did do the right thing. Screw him. Forget him. Let him go live his asshole life without you, you deserve better...that's my serious answer.
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in the past my boyfriend and i got into many arguments about times when he was high or drung..but he claims he doesnt do it anymore and PROMISES he wont do it again (he knows i'll break up with him if i find him high or drunk again) BUT on friday i think he was high cuz his eyes were a 'tint' redish BUT he wasnt actin it or nothin and he didnt smell like it so my question is what are the signs that someone is high? so next time I KNOW when he is high and if he wasnt i dont accuse him of something he didnt do? so how would they act? eyes look? All that? and how long does someones eyes turn red for? can u get high without ur eyes gettin red? HELP PLEASE! (link)
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Behavior change would play a big part because when you're high you get real stupid and you can say things that don't make sense, your response levels slow down and everthing is funny, he may not take anything seriously. Also, if he has a hard time looking you in the eyes, that could give it away. Don't rely on red eye alone. Yeah, and if he doesn't smell like it, then he may not be, because as you may know, weed has a very distinct, strong, sweet smell that gets into your clothes and hair. As for being drunk, I'm sure you know what that is supposed to look like.
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Hi everyone! I wanna be an actress so bad! I'm 13/f. I live in Grafton, WI. I love making my own movies and acting in them and I'd like to be a famous actress. How could I get a start? (link)
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Take part in your school's plays. Try out for parts in your town, there are usually try outs at places like a local college, or a town opera/acting house. Find out what you have in your town that you can be a part of. Keep on going in that direction. Learn to act and do it. You certainly can!
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ok, my friend he duz marijuana. his dad got involved and had him stop but now he is shooting up on drugs!! he wont listen to ne1 because he is depressed and he just keeps taking the drugs because he thinks they are making him feel better. he alredy had one break down like this last year and i dont kno wut to do! plz help~ (link)
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You are definately not responsible for this person and his actions. But you can be a friend. Try reminding him of the things he liked before he replaced those things with drugs. Decide if you want to risk your friendship with him (usually only during recovery) to send him some real kind of serious help by telling, or weather you want to just be there for him; let him know that no matter what you're his friend. Seeing as how he's already had one break down, there is less of a chance this is just a phase that would quickly pass. Maybe you could tell someone that you could trust without letting your friend know that it was you who hinted for help for him. Or maybe he is someone you can talk to yourself to encourage he get help. You have choices. Choose them wisely and the best of luck to you and your friend.
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i took a girl on a first date with a girl and she is a sophmore and i am a freshman. she made me pick the movie and i accidently picked a blood and guts movie. she said she liked it and i asked her the next day for a second date and she said yes. do you think this is a second date out of pitty? (link)
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not likely; she's digging your company, face it!
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okay, me and my best friend have this journal that we write in almost everyday and we give it back and forth to eacohther, etc..well its been like a week and we cant find it...we always keep it in our back packs n stuff and we think that one of our guy friends took it..hes just like a girlfriend to us, hes the only guy we hang out with etc..it has ALOT of personal stuff in it, and we have talked about our friends in it too..he did it be4 but only kept it for like an hour and it was a joke..we confronted him about it but he sware that he didnt take it but we still think he did..thers so much dirt in there!!! whut should we do (link)
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uh-oh, maybe he did or he didn't or maybe you guys lost it in between someplace dropping it someplace between school and home. I know, that's tough. I'm a journal writer myself and I've lost many writings, at home, in school. I hope you guys find it and it's just somewhere stupid and you'll laugh about it and wipe the sweat off your foreheads. But if it's gone, I don't know, ask that boy again, but if he keeps saying he didn't take it, maybe you might need to try and believe him.
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I hate life sometimes. I really wonder if i should just run away or kill myself. Why do i hate it so much, i'm only 12 and want to die. I don't cut and do shit like that but i'm so lost and dead. What should i do? (link)
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Life DOES suck sometimes and life is always going to sucks sometimes. It seems there are more sucky times than good times. But hang in there. Maybe you need to be doing something with your time, like reading, writing, making things...don't know what type of person you are, but my advice is to excel in whatever you like to do. Enjoy life right now because later on you're going to have to work and take on all of life's responsibilites, now that's tough. I'm 24 and I miss being 12!! Good luck and have some fun!!
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my friend is 14/m and he keeps askin me how to ask out a girl and etc..
and he asked how to flirt and i said idk..and he said well teach me..and i said well it comes natural and etc..and he said yeah i know but not when your under pressure...
can u tell me how to tell him how to flirt w/ this girl and etc.. (link)
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Sure: Tell him to go into it with a warm and friendly ora. Be ready to laugh and to give off an inviting warmth about him. I see why you are asking this...flirting is kinda hard to describe. Also, tell him to make a lot of eye contact, smile, and to make it like he feels really comfortable around this person. After a few comfortable moments around each other, he should try asking this girl to hang out and set up for it with a time and place or whatever. You were right when telling him that flirting should come natural. Also tell him to make his personality glow in front of her and she should like him for who he is.
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What age would you let your Child date?? What would you allow them to do with Him or Her? (link)
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Honestly, your child will clue you in when he or she is ready. As far as what they DO, just keep your child educated and aware of safety, and the stuff that goes with sex ed, because they are gonna do what they're gonna do when they are ready, believe me. Just be there for your child and forbid nothing unless it is life threatening.
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Hi, I am a 14 year old female and I am in love with my best guyfriend. We have known eachother for 5 years and we go to the same school and we always sit together at lunch. But, I dont know if he likes me back! He is always sending mixed messeges to me and I can never figure it out! It is really frustrating me and I need to know if he likes me. We always mess around by like tripping eachother in the hallway or hitting eachother with books and stuff. I dont know if its just fun or flirting!I really want to know! Also, the other day, we were talking about who we liked, and i made up some guy and he was wondering who it was, so if that helps and the only reason that he sits with me at lunch is probably cuz im his only friend that goes to Sprayberry! thanks so much! i rate high! (link)
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Guess what: I have now had a relationship with my best guy friend from high school for 5 1/2 years and we have an 11 mo. old son together now too. It is so great to fall in love with your best guy friend. It is a great foundation for love to begin with friendship. This is what you should do: Spend more time with him. Don't try to think TOO hard about those mixed signals he's sending. Just enjoy your time with him and keep feeling the feelings you're feeling, it's not a bad thing to do. As you spend more and more time with him, his true feelings will surface. Just one thing: Try not to tell him little white lies like you did about liking someone. Now you're sending HIM mixed signals that could erase what would be. Just be his friend but with more time spent together, plot out special times not just anything, but something special once in a while. Make him know you care a lot about him and enjoy being with him, which should make him enjoy time spent with you. I hope it all works out for you!
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k me and my [ex] bf broke up ALONG LONG LONG time ago..i think he even has another gf now, but neway its been like a year or something that we havent been together and we havent even talkd in almost that long..it would be our 2 yr anniversary comin up in like a month...we broke up in tha rainy season and it was SUCH heartbreak for me..i cried every night for like 3 months straight....but the thing is, not even like 2 hrs will go by that i dont think of him...and since its the rainy season im thinkin about him so much more and im really sad..this isnt normal to STILL not be over some1 by now is it? (link)
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That's the thing with seasons. They bring back old feelings over and over again for the rest of our lives. I know the feeling. I go through with the change of every new season. It must be normal human feelings, because I feel the same as you. Do you wonder if he thinks the same as you do? It's just endless dizzy wonder that doesn't seem to go away. I'm sad right now too about somebody, yeah it's normal, but it also sucks. What to do about it is another question!!
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Hello! I am a 14 year old young lady and I need help with this certain problem. Where I go to school, there are alot of people that dress "punk" or something like that. I love to dress that way and I wear punk clothes outside of school though. I don't want to wear my punky clothes in school because people see me as this smart and conservative girl. Yes, I do have good grades and I am conservative, but I love to dress "punk", but I am afraid that people will see me as this "wannabe" or "poser" and I don't want that to happen. What should I do? Do what I am doing now or should I finally stop hiding from the shadows? I know what people will say, they will say that I should not care what others think, but it's not that easy when you're a teen! Please help and I would really appreciate it! Thank you again! (link)
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I have an idea for you! Try this: Outside of school go completely "punk." When you are in school dress the way you need to but with "a hint of punk." Add with your attire some punk-like accessories, like jewelry or shoes like combat boots with an office style skirt and kinda, notso, revealing top and punk bracelets or necklace or even handbag. Also, I don't know what color hair you have, but if say you have blonde hair, add just one streak of pink on the side or red if your hair is dark, to accent your style. In school you want people to see: An office type chic that seems pretty damn cool. Out of school let who you want to be shine all the way. To sum up my advice: Comprimise your style when you're in school. Have fun!!
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Our 21 year old daughter had to move back home, because her roomate moved out to go to college. Our daughter couldn't afford rent on her own, so she moved in with us. She got a job working as a cocktail waitress in a real dumpy bar, now she has started dating a "regular" from the bar, and he is a 23 year old drug(meth)dealer. I have pleaded with her not to go out with this loser, to no avail. Question: Should we throw her out and risk her moving in with the boyfriend or try to put up with it, in hopes that she will see the light and dump him. She says she really likes him. As far as I know, she is not using meth, but does smoke pot. I am really scared. (link)
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Try to keep her safe with you, if she decides to go on her own time, allow her, she is a 21 year old woman now, her choices are her own. Let her know what you think about her choices, but don't try to control her or fight with her. Just offer advice and guidance. Be a friend to her more than anything, because you guys already had your mother/daughter troubled teen years together, don't make a repeat of it. Trust her judgement. If you try to be that mom punishing the 16 year old again, she is going to push away in revenge, you don't want that. Just be there for her. Don't push for arguments or anything. Good luck!
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See, i'm gay, and thats why i have a gurly user name, i am really a man! my boyfriend just broke up with me, and i am really depressed, i look so straight in gay bars no one aproaches me, what should I do!? please help! (link)
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Maybe you could try the approaching if you are the one out on the prowl. I am a bi-sexual chic and believe me, I know what you're saying. I see hot chics everywhere, in the grociery store and wherever and I just don't know how to approach without looking retarded. But good thing you go to gay bars that's a good start. I can't go to bars because I have a baby. So maybe try to do the approaching, and if you're too shy, then keep on going and hoping for YOUR NIGHT. It's gotta happen sometime.
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hey i have a problem with cutting and i dunno how to controll it and today 10/22/04 i wound up cutting my self agian because my b.f broke up with me and im like in love with him and ahh...hard to explain and well i need some advice on how to stop or atleast trying to controll it please help me!! ill rate you high and i would like some advice from ppl who actualy do it or used to thanks soo much and if you wanna takl to me more about it im me on
babi beautifulx3 or email me at babii_thug_699@yahoo.com
thanks so much!! ill rate ya a five if ya get at me
love always courtney (link)
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Hey, Courtney. I am 23 now, and when I was like 15-17 I was cutting too. I loved that feeling after being so angry about something and no one to talk to about it with I was like, "hey I know what to do!" I had a special spot, I wouldn't cut anyplace else but at the top of my left arm by my shoulder. Whenever someone saw scrapings there they would be like, what happened, a cat scratch ya? I would say something like, "I was mad about something and there was no one there to rescue me." Let me tell you, you are so not alone in this. It is extremely common for teens to do this. It does not by any means make it okay, but in high school a lot of my friends did it too. This one girl did it in the middle of class so bad, there was blood everywhere, it was horrible. That was a severe case. Luckily I was not a severe case, it was just a babit for me, and unfortunately I enjoyed it, and hopefully you are not a severe case either. What I think the reason may be that teens feel the need to do this is they are exploring ways to deal with pain and frustration. Many people over look all the troubles and pains that are involved in the teenage years, all the stresses, the expectations, the learning, and developing and exploring who you are and what you want to be...it's crazy. People wonder why teens always have to act in revenge or cause trouble. I guess what I want to say is that you are definately not the only one, there are millions like you, and there are many ways to help yourself stop. Find what you like to do (other than cutting) and do it. Write poetry. Play an instrument. Bake cookies. Just use positive ways to deal with anger instead. The results in life are much more rewarding that way, believe me. Take that negative energy and make something great out of it. It's easy if you try. Good luck! You'll be fine, just trust yourself.
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my best freind Tina and i have been best freinds sicne we were 4 and we're so close! well she and i became freinds w/ this girl kaylinn and at first her and tina were really close but a couple months later they got into a huge fight and hate eachother...now im caught in the middle...i would pick my bestfrind over kaylinn cuz i've known tina for ever but im not gunna just drop kaylinn. i dont want enemies! anyway i really dont kno what to do so if theres any tips feel free to say them (link)
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My answer is to stay mutual. Let them know you would not appreciate it if either of them were going to make you choose between the two. Let them know that what's going on is between them and you don't want to talk behind anyones back, but will be there for each of them for listening or to maybe gesture some advice.
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hey .. i wrote a few days ago about my boyfriend that's in the hospital .. hes in intensive care for his head injury .. well, this is the update .. the doctors recently had to cut open his head and take a part of his brain out so that they can run tests and all or sumthin lyk that..(i still quite dont understand it) .. and then they will put it back in and all that ..and hes still in the drug induced coma.. but now that this has happened, all those people that said he'll be okay .... do you still feel that way?? (link)
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If he is in the best possible hospital like you said he was, he is getting the best care possible, they know what they are doing over there, they are going to make things okay to the best of their abilities. Pray also to give these doctors the know how and the strength and you can be sure he's in good hands. Keep us updated.
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hi am 17 senior in h.s i was planning on going to college and everything. i was dating a guy who 25 and we broke up 3 weeks ago about one week ago i found out i was 5weeks pregant should i tell him?? how can i tell him?? (link)
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Yeah, you're going to need to tell him. I don't know what type of guy he is if he'll be immature about it or if he'll be there for you. Just do one thing for me: DO NOT let him talk you into getting an abortion. It is completely wrong, you need to be strong, owe up to your actions and have this baby because once you do, once you see those first smiles it will all be worth it. If this guy has a good job but will not be there for you, hit him up for child support. If he will be there for you, great! If you are going to have to go through this without him, nothing is dealt to you that you cannot handle, you will have family and friends who will be there for you. Even though you are kinda young (but not too bad) think of this as a gift from him because a baby really is a precious gift. Just please don't let anyone talk you into aborting this child, YOU CAN DO THIS!! It won't be easy at times but it will be so beautiful, the whole experience. Oh, about college, you could always do online courses, there are many options out there for mothers. You have something more important to think about now...a new life. This new life is depending on you RIGHT NOW. So, congratulations and if you ever need to talk please email me at ICE11BLUE@aol.com
I am 23 with a 10 mo. old baby and I would love to be there to answer any ?'s you may have. I'm there for ya, babe! Good luck, and again, CONGRATULATIONS!!
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What do I do about an 'old flame' of my wife's that she has emailed recently and that I found out about? The messages back and forth hurt me deeply. I love her very much and she says she loves me and it will never happen again. I believe her but am vulnerable and afraid. I haven't always been the best communicator to her and want to do everything I can to show her how much I still love her, more than when I first met her years ago. The 'old flame' was her first high school sweetheart, way before I met her and I am truly at a loss for what the best way to approach this all is. By the way, we are both in our late 40's. (link)
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Okay, did you ask your wife what she was emailing this guy about, or think about what you saw for emails? It may not be anything of a guilty act. Maybe she is trying to get closure from something of years ago. Go ahead and ask her, and if that is the case, then let her get closure with something from the past that is bothering her. Let her close up an old wound if she needs to. You can't erase her past and if she needs to fix something let her. If it is a guilty thing going on, ask her what she is missing in her relationship with you that she feels she needs to go and seek it someplace else. Tell her you are willing to work on it. If it is just as simple as she deeply cared about this person years ago and is curious how his life is going now, tell her you would appreciate it if she found out about him for her own satisfaction, and then let it go, and leave it at that. I think it's important if you ask her and you find out why she has talked to him, what her intentions were. Try to be understanding and never try to ridicule her for her past. If she is being guilty, then you can ridicule her for her present actions.
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