13/f
Is it weird to get aroused to the thought of someone hurting me? Not like beating me, but like during sex taking a knife and making little cuts just enough to where they bleed? I mean, im 13.... I really shouldn't have these thoughts. I also get aroused when i think of a guy... like dominating me. Its just weird. And i live in a house hold where if there's something wrong, and you need to go to a therapist of be on depression meds you get disowned and thrown out of the family. And you'll get sent to a far away school where you'll live there. Its happened to my sister betheny and my cousin Danny.... What should i do?
Cutting yourself for pleasure might be a little extreme but having sexual fantasies about being dominated is perfectly normal. I've lived out many situations where bondage and domination were involved. You are a bit to young to consider doing this and being able to have safe words for your partner, so he know when to stop but when you're 18 you can find plenty of people that share your interest in bdsm. For now, I would reccomend doing a little research and read up on this a little more to see if it's something you really want to pursue. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
Ok, it's not like you think well maybe it is we really haven't gone on a date for a really long time and we did a few weeks ago, still no sex. I devote plenty of time to the relationship, still no sex. He did become abusive again a few months ago but I'm over it and have forgiven him. I guess I should have left then or something. Even when we do have sex which has now dwendled down to less than one time a week, I do not feel sexual if that makes sense. Before I enjoyed it, now it's like I'm going through the motions. Any suggestions?
I'm sorry to say but I think you need to find someone else. He shows all the signs that he's not in love with you and possibly that he's getting sex from someone else. You can try working things out or some type of counseling but I really believe he will return to his old ways. Find someone who appreciates you, will truly love you and will treat you right. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
Ive been with my b/f for 5 years and have always enjoyed sex/love making with him. Lately I cant get into it and havnt orgasmed in a while. What can I do to get in the mood. I dont masturbate, I dont know why I dont, I just feel weird putting my fingers there, but I think I could enjoy myself with a toy I just never felt the need to purchase something so expensive when I can get the real thing. I dont want to substitute him, maybe just learn more about myself so I can enjoy it more with him. Any suggestions?
You may be having some mental issues that are preventing you from achieving a good orgasm. Sometimes if you have family, work or relationship problems, it can cause a change in mood. Try lighting some candles, take a long bubble bath, lay naked on the bed and let your hands roam your body. Lightly tease yourself and let your mind wander away to a fantasy. You can also try watching a little porn and maybe you might discover something new you'd like to try with your b/f. Don't give up on trying some toys, they're not as expensive as you think. You can get some good ones from amazon or www.intimategadgets.com and it won't break your bank. You can start with a small vibrator and a little dildo for some fun. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
ok so im 13 and i believe im bisexual but im not very open about it (i told my 2 bffs and then 1 got pissed off at me and told someone and now like 10 others have heard :*( ) but i have never had a relationship with either a guy or a girl. i wanna know who the lesbians and bisexuals are in my school cause i might want to get 2 know some of them. how can i find that out without going up 2 every girl and asking if they are attracted 2 girls?!?!
I know things have changed a lot since I was in school but I started getting curious about being with girls around 16. It was more of trial and error with a couple of them. If I had a feeling a girl was attracted to me, I went out on a few friend dates and eventually invited them to sleep over. We'd play a little truth and dare and if they'd refuse a kissing dare or any type of touching dare, I knew they weren't into girls or maybe they just weren't into me. Just play it cool for a while and I'm sure you'll find what you're looking for. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask me. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
Hello! Many of us women and/or men tend to feel hurt when we find out that our significant other is looking at others on the internet (porn). Although the simple answer to this problem is communication, what is the answer to what your husband of wife says? For example, I've found that some men say they watch it because they get the sudden urge, and since they're not doing anything special, they just do it. I'd like for men to answer this question, but women are open to comment too. Would you say this random moment of watching porn could stem from not doing anything? If you don't have a job, and don't go to school, do you think that might be the problem? Thanks in advance for your opinions!
I'm pretty busy most of the time but i love to escape with a little porn. When i'm feeling stressed or sometimes I get a little horny in the middle of the day, i'll jump over to a good porn site. I'm sure everyone has their reasons why they watch but I think if it doesn't interfere with your daily activities, it's perfectly normal. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
Im a married man with children. For a living I am a personal trainer. Lately, I have been finding it harder and harder to keep my urges hidden. During work when I see a big buff man I get an erection instantly. So yes I am not doubting the fact that Im gay. But how can I tell my wife and kids? Im 28 years old by the way.
I think you have two choices here. You can have several affrairs with different men, stay married and hope your wife doesn't fins out. Or, you can be open and honest with her about your sexual preferences. If you still love her, you can see if she will let you live out your fantasies but continue to stay married. My husband is very understanding and when I get the urge, he allows me to sleep with another woman. Whatever happens, you should let her decide how she wants to handle things and you should support her decision. I really hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
how do I stop hurting cause my husband is looking at naked younger women on his laptop.
My husband watches porn and has his own collection of naked pictures he saves on the computer. I know that those women are younger, in better shape and way hotter looking than I am but I know he loves me and isn't going anywhere. I think you need to have better communication with him and let him know that you need more reassurance that you're still good enough and he's not going to seek out another woman. I'm sure everything is fine and he's just a normal horny man. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
I eat wayyy to much when I start I cant stop. I need to quit junk food and stop eating it forever. How can I do this?
Quitting cold turkey probably won't happen but cutting down a little bit at a time, is a little more realistic goal. Do your best to keep it out of the house and make sure you're full when you go grocery shopping. Buy more fruits and veggies or even peanuts or cheese as an alternative snack. Don't carry any change with you so you won't be tempted to hit the vending machines. Try to make sure you're full after each meal so the snacking temptation will be a little less. Just do your best to make a consious effort to make the changes you need and it will make things a little easier. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
I can only have a clitoral orgasm. Is it possible for me to have an orgasm that is not generated by the clitoris?
Every woman is a little different but it is possible to have other orgasms. I've experienced orgasms from having my breasts sucked on, vaginal sex and anal sex. They usually aren't as strong as when I stimulate my clit but I can occasionally orgasm those other ways. I wouldn't worry about it and just enjoy having sex. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
okay im 24 with 4 kids and i have a boyfriend who treats me like crap. he doesnt help me with the kids he stays out all night and im up crying waiting for him to come home the most hes been gone for is 7 days he didnt call or check up.to make things worse is were currently staying in a 1 bedroom motel suite.He come and goes calls me names and stresses me out.He spends my money all the time he even spent my cristmas money i had saved up for my kids.im tired i want better for me and my kids he rather be at the casino then to be with us.I want to leave him so baddd but i cant cus i have no where to go.I have family but there not there for me im a good mother and want to be happy,i deserve it. he didnt even tell me happy mothers day nothing.he has no respect for me at all.im always with my kids an he running the streets.Help
I would look into moving to the next county closest to you. Apply for food stamps, welfare, section 8 and try to find a new job there. After you have a new place established, pack up your kids and when he's gone for the night, leave. Don't tell anyone where you're at for a few months, till you've had a chance to settle down. Try to save up some money during that time, hire an attorney and file for child support from this deadbeat. Once you've been able to stand on your own for a while, I believe your family will be a little more willing to help out. Things won't happen quickly, so you'll have to have a little patience. I hope things work out for you and good luck.
[view]
I am 18 years old. I was at Barnes and Noble's and a guy came up to me. We started talking and he asked me out on a date to a play. He wants to eat out before and then attend the play. I am strapped for cash so it is bad if I expect him to pay for everything. This would be my first date so I am not entirely sure how this is supposed to work. I feel bad for making him pay for everything considering it would be dinner and a play. The tickets for the play is $30. Also, I feel like I would be putting women's rights back 50 years if I let him. I already said yes and he is new to the city so if I didn't work out romantically I feel we could be friends.
Typically if a guy asks you out, he's planning on paying for everything. If you do have a little bit of money, you could offer to pay for parking or offer to leave a tip at dinner. Truthfully, I wouldn't worry about and try to enjoy yourself. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
Why is the culture in southern california so diseased. I've been to plenty of states and countries, and its only socal where i see sluts who disrespect their parents, vomit in their cars their parents bought them, only think about sex, and even at such a young age! Why is this? Why are girls so indecent here.
I think you can find this problem all over but probably more openly there. It really has to do with their upbringing and what their parents are like. If they live in a single parent home or have very busy parents, chances are they don't have any responsibilities, respect for their elders or respect for themselves. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
so, i have this friend. let's call her nancy. nancy and i grew up together since we were 9. we went to the same school and in high school we grew even closer. nancy and i had lunch every day and we became like sisters. it seemed to me that i could write a book about her and she could write a book about me. my senior year in high school i started to get mysterious emails from a "lesbian girl" in my class and all the evidence traced it to nancy. for one, the emails were coming from school but they didn't match the network and at the time, she was using a lan card to connect to the internet. this mysterious writer also knew a lot about me and my class schedule, which nancy knew a lot about obviously, since they were almost the same. i refused to believe it because i was blind and nancy was my best friend. i would just like to say here that i am no way interested in girls and nancy knows this.
so, nancy and i go to the same university and for the first two years, we were having a blast. we were going to frat parties, living the college life. we also shared a very deep wound in common. we both had met the loves of our lives at 16 and were struggling with our relationships with those men. she had her issues with her and i had my issues with mine. but, we were there for each other. suddenly, nancy, who claims that this guy who she was with was her love starts dating this SUPER sketchy guy. But, SUPER SKETCHY. he said that he owned all these businesses and we never saw them. he also started posting ads on craigslist that he wanted another girl. it was just weird. so she broke up with this guy and started dating another guy. we'll call him drew.
drew is a nice guy and all... but he's 31... and we're 20. drew is also her boss' brother. and while she was dating drew... she was sleeping with other people. but, now I think her and drew are exclusive. not too long ago, i would meet them for lunch, since they both work at the university. every time i would say something to her she would look at me like i was stupid and exchange glances with drew like they were making fun of me. it made me feel really uncomfortable. my mom kept warning me about nancy, saying she didn't have a good feeling.
Not too long ago, her and drew claimed that they were going to meet me at a club and ditched me there! I was in the nightclub all by myself. So, I cut ties with her because I was really hurt that she had left me there by myself. so, i blocked her from seeing my wall on facebook. then, the other day i get a mysterious friend request from a guy who happens to have all the same interests and music as her...???
All of this is bad... but for some reason, I miss nancy. i feel like no one else will get my jokes. no one else has the same history or grew up with me. but, at the same time, she treats me like i'm stupid and she doesn't make time for me because she's into fixing houses and gardens and taxes with her 31 year old boyfriend, drew. there's nothing WRONG with those things, but I mean, if you were 16, would u want to be dating a 27 year old guy? I mean, this is the same thing.I don't want her to look back on this and say I missed out. She already missed out on a lot senior year because she moved out with her first boyfriend and didn't go to prom or grad night or anything! This is also really weird, but every time I would tell nancy something, it wouldn't happen. like, if i told her i was going out on a date, the guy wouldn't show up. if i told her i was going to class, i wouldn't be able to make it. I know, it's strange.
What can I do? I know that I just feel this way because I grew up with her. I just don't know what to do. I know next year will be different for me because I am super involved in school and hopefully going to start working at school and making all of these new friends. I'm even going to join a sorority. But, I just need someone, an outsider, to give me their opinion.
Thanks guys. God bless you xoxo
You've got a lot going on in this message. Let's start with the earlier relationship. I think if she really had a crush on you or wanted to hook up with you, she would've made a move. That's what I did when I had a crush on my friend. I waited till we were drinking and I made a pass at her and let things go from there. If she really is bisexual, she would've hooked up some other girls by now and being her best friend, I'm sure she would've told you about it. As far as the older guy is concerned, you can't compare your friend at 16 and then at 20 because that is a huge maturity level difference. I hooked up with some great guys that were way older than I was when I was your age. She's old enough to date anyone she chooses even if it's not someone you approve of. There's a possibility that she resents you for not approving of her choice in boyfriend. I know that being her friend, you're only trying to look out for her best interest and sometimes an outsider can see things that we can't see right in front of our faces but she's a big girl now and if she decides to make bad decisions, that's her choice. Do your best to reach out to her and be her friend without trying to interfere with her life. If you need any other help, please feel free to ask me. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
My kid's father has a screw or two loose. I left him in 2004 when he choked my daughter. He served one year probation and went to anger management. Now we have a new problem. My kids are 11, 13, and 14. Over the past few visits with their dad he has encouraged the kids to smoke and drink with him. When my 13 year old (very shy) girl said no, he held the cup of beer to her face and demanded she drink it. She said no and slapped it away. (just found this out today).He holds lit cigarettes and tries to get them to smoke it. I confronted him on it and he said IT WAS ALL TRUE!! A yelling match ensued and I asked him if he was insane. He replied, "no, they are my kids and i will give it to them".I told him that they were NOT raised this way and they do not want it..My husband and I do not smoke and rarely drink.He smokes in the car on hour long commutes with my son who has severe asthma, when i asked him not to, he said i cant control what he does. My kids are very quiet, well mannered straight A honor students. I have done very well with them and Can't believe what is going on. He has never been a great person but this is going WAY too far. I promise you this is not a case of a spurned spose trying to get back at the other, I am seriously worried. Why the hell would he want his young daughters to get drunk with him?? Should I go to the court, call childrens services, police? I told him I would have him arrested and his response was "Try Me". Dear lord..HELP =)
I am so sorry that you and your children have to suffer through his stupidity. It sounds like your kids are quite intelligent and have done the right thing so far. I'm not sure if I would go to the police right away but I would strongly recommend you speak to an attorney. Since your kids are older, I would talk to them and see how they feel about their father. They probably still love him but may not approve of his actions. If it's possible have a few members of his family and your kids, sit down and have a good talk with him about his actions. I hope that he can make changes for the sake of your children. I wish you the best sweetie and good luck.
[view]
I don't have a vibrator and icant buy one. What is a good way to masturbate using vibrations? Like hat can I use instead of a vibrator that vibrates? 14/f
If you know anyone that has a debit card, amazon is a good place to buy sex toys discreetly. They also sell handheld back massagers that have good vibrations.
http://www.amazon.com/Homedics-PM-50-Massager-Battery-Operated/dp/B00170DB8U/ref=sr_1_7?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1307300922&sr=1-7
I'm not sure but you can check your local walmart in the health and beauty dept. I found one that plugs in and would be plenty powerful for a good orgasm.
http://www.walmart.com/ip/Wahl-Corded-2-Speed-Body-Massager-With-Heat/10965209
I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
do guys like it when girls touch themselves? does it turn you on or is it unattractive?
Every guy I was with got incredibly turned on when I would start out playing with myself. I would often rub my clit and squeeze my breasts during intercourse. That would have a dual purpose; it would turn my partner on and I would be able to orgasm easier. As long as you're comfortable with your body, go for it. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
Please help me.. so let's just say I looked through the guys history.. and in his history said that he looked up ''Ask whoever how to let go your lover?'' that just heart broke me... not only that but in his messages this girl he never told me about was trying to find him. And he replied '' Yeah, I do remember who you are now after seeing a picture of you... no, it was not for shits and giggles and I stopped talking to you because I knew we were never going to work out.'' what do I think of that? that was just after we met... and like he was on dating sites I found him and I asked him so many times to not go on dating sites , and his last login was over a month.... which means he did not listen to me.
I always pay for him , I always do everything like going over to his house and telling how much he means to me , but he even if he comes over he leaves early because of his dog , he never tells me how much he loves me , and he looks at other girls when im with him. Please help me!
I feel like such a hearbreak right now and I really dont want to be cheated or hurt again. Please help me!
We seen eachother for about 6 months..
He's only keeping you around till he finds something else. He will keep doing these things because he knows you won't break up with him. He can treat you badly, ignore you, look for other girls or he may even be leaving early to hook up with someone else and you'll still take him back. I'm sorry to say but it's time to let him go and find someone that will treat you the way you deserve to be treated. He may promise to change and say he's sorry for a short time but I guarantee that he'll get bored and go back to his same bad ways. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
I am crying so bad as i right this i feel horrible right now, so my boyfriend looked at porn and i found out about a year and a half ago and i came online for help because i have such a low self esteem and i felt like i was not good enough when he did this. But when i came online everyone said it was normal well all the guys of course which makes sense for them to stick up for themselves ... then we started having less pleasurable sex but i thought at least we had sex and still i came online and asked if it it was normal but like always guys said it was supposedly normal...then he couldnt get hard by me at all..and we couldnt have sex and i did not why..and i was gonna break up with him, because it was the tenth time of his softness (by that i mean not being able to get hard) it was two days before valentines but on valentines day he asked me to see him since we've been together for 4 yrs almost an i agreed ...and we had sex and i asked him why he could and he said it was because he hadnt jacked off to pornography so we got back together and sometimes he got hard and sometimes he didnt but like always i looked up online and online it said it was probably stress and ect but not my fault and i tried to think i wasnt the reason for it i wasnt the reason he could not get hard because i have always been very depressed and suicidal and im afraid thinking that will just get me off the edge so anyway he stopped looking at it cause i got birth control and he could ejaculate inside of me and thought that was way better than jacking off ...i rarely have my period because of birth control but i had my period this week and he was jacking off my to breasts and ejaculating on me since i couldnt have sex but it baffled me that he could get hard everyday this week because i thought the problem was that he would jack off...but now i get it the problem was me because when he looked at porn then looked at me & couldnt get hard because the girls there are increadibly good looking and i admit im chubby i weigh 170 am 5 4 and i have 36D breasts and a normal size butt but a sort of chubby stomach and i just feel horrible because i asked him this and he said yes i think thats why..so this whole time it was me and i got to be honest i just feel like killing myself now that ive found this out..like i asked him so like after you saw them and then you saw me you didnt find me attractive? and he admitted yes but yet the whole time he couldnt get hard i would sob because i noticed like he would only get hard for a little while then i would try to get him in and he would get soft like after i took my clothes off and i felt horrible but he swore it was because he jacked off not because of me but if that was the case wouldnt he be getting soft now?! :( i just feel horrible cause i have horrible unreachable standards ill never be as good looking as them and i cant get this horirble thought of my head that the whole time it was me who couldnt get him up!!! :( :( :(
There is nothing wrong with you sweetie. I'm not quite sure if you want to stay with this guy or not but I'll give you some advice for him or any future relationships you may have. There is a possibility that he's having emotional problems or he may not be in love with you. That could be causing his inability to get hard. There is an over the counter medicine from vitamin world called Vigrex. My husband uses it occasionally and it works great. If you really want to stay with him or even if you want to make your next man happy, try watching a little bit of porn with him, even if you really don't like it. Find out what things he's into and maybe even experiment a little and try them out. Make sure he knows that you're willing to give a little for the relationship but he needs to do the same for you. The sex shouldn't be all one sided because you have needs just the same as he does. If this guy can't fulfill your needs and can't make you happy, it's probably time to move on to someone that will make you happy. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
18/f i've never been gay before, and maybe i'm still not. but i love this girl at my school and its causing depression and anxiety.
first off, school ended for me about two weeks ago. i graduated. she's still a junior. we talked at school all the time and everything was really cool, she even started liking me back. but now schools ended. i haven't seen her in what feels like an eternity and every day, its getting harder to move forward. i try to talk to her sometimes, but texting isn't the same. i wanna SEE her. and everytime i try to hang out, she's busy. i think she may be avoiding me. she knows i'm into her, but she definitely doesn't know the extent of my feelings. another problem is that she's in love with this other guy. they used to go out but now they are just a casual item...i don't really know. but she's not dumping him anytime soon. meanwhile, i can't eat or sleep. when i do eat, its by force. when i do sleep, its by the help of marijuana. i don't know what to do. i want to talk to her but i don't want to annoy her. i feel like this is more than love. like infatuation or something and its really scaring me and literally killing me. WHAT THE HELL CAN I DO???
We always want what we can't have. The more this girl plays hard to get, the harder it is for you. Try your best to keep cool for a while and don't seem to desperate to be with her. I think a small group date with her is best for now. See if you can get a couple other friends to go out to lunch, coffee or the mall and invite her along. She may not feel so intimidated if there's other people around. Try just being her friend for a while before you reveal your feelings for her. When you do finally get the courage up to tell her how you feel, be ready for her to possibly turn you down. You'll have to let her know that you still would love to be friends with her and you respect her feelings. I had a girl that I had a huge crush on and I was sure she felt the same way. We hung out a lot and after going to the movies one night, I went in for a kiss in the car and she politely let me know that she didn't feel that way toward me. I was really embarrassed and didn't know what to do. We did end up staying friends but I always hoped she would change her mind someday. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask me. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
I am 15 and I'm the captain of a club soccer team with one other girl. The girl's mother is not going to let her come back because of the experience her other children had, but I'm pretty desperate for her to come back and she desperately wants to as well. Would it be completely out of line for me to talk to either of her parents? what would I even say?
It would probably be better if you could get a few other school mates and another parent to go along for a talk. Sometimes if a parent gets reassured from several sources, they'll feel better about a bad situation. Make sure that you find out from your friend if she even wants to come back. There's a possibility that she's using her mom as an excuse to get out of soccer. I hope this helps and good luck.
[view]
|
