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Father trying to force kids to drink and smoke
My kid's father has a screw or two loose. I left him in 2004 when he choked my daughter. He served one year probation and went to anger management. Now we have a new problem. My kids are 11, 13, and 14. Over the past few visits with their dad he has encouraged the kids to smoke and drink with him. When my 13 year old (very shy) girl said no, he held the cup of beer to her face and demanded she drink it. She said no and slapped it away. (just found this out today).He holds lit cigarettes and tries to get them to smoke it. I confronted him on it and he said IT WAS ALL TRUE!! A yelling match ensued and I asked him if he was insane. He replied, "no, they are my kids and i will give it to them".I told him that they were NOT raised this way and they do not want it..My husband and I do not smoke and rarely drink.He smokes in the car on hour long commutes with my son who has severe asthma, when i asked him not to, he said i cant control what he does. My kids are very quiet, well mannered straight A honor students. I have done very well with them and Can't believe what is going on. He has never been a great person but this is going WAY too far. I promise you this is not a case of a spurned spose trying to get back at the other, I am seriously worried. Why the hell would he want his young daughters to get drunk with him?? Should I go to the court, call childrens services, police? I told him I would have him arrested and his response was "Try Me". Dear lord..HELP =)
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You need to contact Child Protective Services and then see an attorney about getting sole custody. Losers love nothing more than to drag others down with them and your ex is trying to do that with your kids. Do not let him see your kids again.
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I think you should contact social services and ask them for advice on the situation or what you should do. I know he is the father and obviously has rights. But you as the mother have rights as well and its illegal to have any child smoke or drink under 18. I dont live in Arkansa but I live close. They just set a new law that if a minor even has any achoal in their system they can be arrested and charged with it.
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I am so sorry that you and your children have to suffer through his stupidity. It sounds like your kids are quite intelligent and have done the right thing so far. I'm not sure if I would go to the police right away but I would strongly recommend you speak to an attorney. Since your kids are older, I would talk to them and see how they feel about their father. They probably still love him but may not approve of his actions. If it's possible have a few members of his family and your kids, sit down and have a good talk with him about his actions. I hope that he can make changes for the sake of your children. I wish you the best sweetie and good luck.
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I believe this fall under the heading of child endangerment. If I am correct you should notify the police and child services and let them investigate the allegations. They are allegations until proven. They will have to speak with your children and decide for themselves the truthfulness of what you have written.
Once the police and child services have finished their investigation they can take appropriate action. If the police find substance to what the children are saying then I believe they can charge him with child abuse and child endangerment. Child services can I believe suspend his visitation or modify it to were he must be supervised, while you go to court to have visitation modified.
Your action starts with asking for help from the appropriate agencies. In this case you start with the police and ask them to help you with child services protection.
While the police and child services investigation is going on you should be talking with your divorce attorney as to when to return to court for custody modification. The question you need to ask is do you file for an emergency hearing or wait until the police and child services finish their investigations and see what actions they take.
It is not my place to take sides in this. My thoughts are for the children. If someone is doing something that will harm them; then you as a responsible parent must do everything you can to protect them.
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