Well, I may not be a guy, but I can tell you that all guys have different opinions as to what kind of girls they like. I mean, I'm 5'3.5" and I'm little in like, every way. *Shrug* My boyfriend obviously likes me. Lol.
Some other guy, though, might want a taller girl. Personality matters to guys, too. You can't tell if they'd like you or not based on the "type" they usually go for.
Some guys like physically small girls - makes them feel big and powerful. My guy can lift me with one arm easily...Lol.
Some guys like tall girls - they don't have to bend down to kiss, and the girl doesn't have to wear heels to get closer to the guy's height. Ish. Lol
Hope this helped in some way!
-Siren =)

Ash,
Based on your personality descriptions of Ben and Ryan, I'm pretty sure you like Ben.
But you're going out with Ryan, who you don't like.
Really think about that one for a second...What you're doing is leading Ryan on. You're letting him think you like him back, and the feelings he has for you will undoubtedly get stronger. Since it'd be harder for you to break up with him if/when he really likes you more, I do suggest you break it off now.
Whatever you do, don't lie about the reason. That's meaner than telling the truth - I mean, if you end up with Ben and Ryan sees you two together, he'll probably feel very hurt. That would suck for their friendships more than if you told him the reason you were breaking up with him was because you liked Ben. You can't help who you like. There's a kind way to explain it to him. Don't brush it off, like "yeah, I'm breaking up with you because I like Ben." Calmly explain to him that you don't feel like it's right to date him when you don't entirely return his feelings. If he asks about who you like, then tell him. If not, just avoid it, I'd say.
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

Well, that depends entirely on what kind of a relationship you want. If you literally want a boy toy - just someone to fool around with and spend some time with, I'd say go with Dan.
However, if you want a solid relationship, go for a loyal, sweet guy like Rob. Realize, too, that once in a relationship, a loyal and faithful guy can become exciting.
Boy toys can get boring after awhile, and you might want commitment. Weigh your options, think everything over, then go with your gut instinct - whatever that little voice in the back of your head is yelling at you to do.
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

Don't worry about the size, honey. I was a 34A until, like...the middle of 10th grade. I'm a 34C now. Guys don't care as much about breast size as we think they do. I mean, do you really want big boobs? Think about it - when they're small, they don't sag at all. There's a plus side to every situation!
Besides, you're only 15. Your breasts won't stop growing for awhile, so let them grow. (and let your boyfriend "feel on it" if you want.)
I hope this helped!
-Siren =)

I don't, actually...I know of some in flint, though, Lol. I suggest you google "detroit teen dance clubs" or something along those lines. I think there's one - Launch. It used to be called Hydrogen, but I think it's in waterford...I live closer to flint than detroit, so I know more about flint stuff than detroit...sorry I couldn't be more helpful. ^^
-Siren =)

I agree with Sherry, ish. Relive your first date. That'd be cute/romantic and all that. That's what I'm gonna suggest to my boy, lol.
Or you could just spend the day together and do things, like go places that bring back memories, or something.
Hope this helped!
-Siren =)

Guzzle water and fruit juices, get looooots of sleep. Avoid soda. Ooh, and Halls strawberry vapor action cough drops work marvellously for sore throats. I'm a singer - I use those to fix my throat if I have a cold before an audition or something.
Hope this helps!
-Siren =)

She won't necessarily know you like her unless you TELL her that you do. I mean, you can easily go "hey, wanna grab coffee sometime? We don't hang out enough." and it doesn't have to be a date, and it doesn't have to mean that you like her. Keep that in mind...=)
Or, you could just tell her the truth...that you really kind of like her, but you know she likes another guy. Maybe she'll give you a chance. Feelings can sometimes develop, y'know.
That's my input...if you need more help, or anything, you can ask again. I'm always here to help.
-Siren =)

Ooh, if he kinda knows who you are, you can do what I told my friend to do.
Go up to him one day and say something like, "Hey, you know, I think you're a cool guy and I'd like to get to know you a little better. Wanna go for coffee sometime?" (or whatever place you wanna hang at).
It's non-shocking, it's just an invite out for coffee. It's honest, and he's unlikely to turn down an invite when put like that. Just be cool about it. You don't even have to say "Wanna go out for coffee sometime?" you can just suggest "Wanna hang sometime?" That way "go" and "out" won't appear in the same sentence together, which pretty much kills any risk of freaking him out and feeling/looking stupid. =)
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

I'm not a guy, but I can tell you that every guy will give you a different answer.
That's why it's possible for all girls to have a boyfriend, and not have the rest of us left out. Some guys like artistic chicks like me, others like girls who are deeply involved in sports and all that. I mean, the options and personality combinations are endless.
Do girls all like one type of guy? I mean, I like 'em tall and lanky, whereas my friend likes them all muscley and not too tall. *Shrug*
NEVER change to get a guy to like you. If he can't like you for who you are, then you don't want to be with him.
Just be you. Every girl has the potential to be good girlfriend material.
I hope this helped!
-Siren =)

Jason,
I'm jewish and white, and my boyfriend's half Chilean and christian. What's your point? Lol just kidding...I'll answer your questions...
As far as your parents not thinking it's okay, they've gotta realize that the heart wants what the heart wants, and that race/religion never has a thing to do with it. Have them meet her and see what a great girl she is.
More often than not, problems with new s/os can be fixed by having the s/o talk to the parents having issues. Worked for me!
That plan for her birthday sounds absolutely sweet and romantic. Most girls, by the way, are partial to flowers. Try to find out - maybe from her mom, if you know her, or her friends, what her favorite flowers are, and buy her one. If my boyfriend did that for me, I'd be speechless. Lucy's lucky to have a guy like you.
I hope this helped on some level!
-Siren =)

This is a tough situation - one I've actually been in. There was this guy I liked. He told me he thought of me as a little sister, but we ended up dating like a week later.
If she hasn't expressed any feelings other than "friendly", chances are you two are just friends. But if you like her, why not tell her? Let her know you don't want what you're about to tell her to mess up your friendship (she might already know...some girls are perceptive), then tell her you kinda like her. It'd get her thinking about the possibility of you two maybe being more than that.
I think if more people were honest about their feelings, the world would be a better place...Lol.
I hope this helps on some level. ^^
-Siren =)

Well, quite honestly, looks do, unfortunately play a big part. (Looks are what made me first notice my current boyfriend)
However, if a hot guy is a conceited, self-absorbed asshole, and there's a sweet, romantic, caring guy who maybe isn't the biggest looker, to compare him to, chances are, the girl will go for the sweet guy, if she's looking for a long-term relationship.
I mean, my guy's great, lookswise, but if he was an ass, I would not be dating him. Personality is really important, too.
-Siren =)

Hey Robert,
Well, the best way to find out if she likes you or not is to actually ASK her. (Or better yet, if you like her, TELL HER. Believe it or not, if a girl likes you, she'll respond to that.)
If you like her, just go up to her one day when she's alone and take a breath and say "Hey Sarah, I have a question...I kinda like you, and was wondering if you feel the same way about me."
As far as her liking someone else, she might have feelings for you, too. I had a problem when I couldn't decide which of two guys I liked most, then one spent more energy on getting me to choose him, so I did. (It turned out to be a mistake, but the other guy wouldn't have worked either, lol).
If you're too nervous to ask her, maybe just...bring it up one day. Like, when you're talking online one night, say something like "one of my friends told me you and I would make a cute couple. How crazy is that?" and see if she thinks it's as crazy as you supposedly do.
It's great that you two are such close friends. Just make sure that you tell her whatever happens, you don't want this friendship to get awkward or anything. You two have a great friendship, sounds like. Make sure bringing romance into the picture won't kill it.
I hope this helps! Let me know how it goes!
-Siren =)

Three years? Whoa. *Claps* That deserves applause. Your parents...*shakes head* I suppose that's good for you, though. I wish my parents didn't care...Lol.
Okay, I won't say you're too young based only on your age because I don't know you. Age is a state of mind, not being, and I stand firmly by that opinion. If you're mentally, emotionally, and physically ready to handle all the risks of having sex with this guy, I say go for it.
Now I have to do my whole shpiel...At the risk of sounding old fashioned, I want to suggest to you that you make sure this guy is "the one". I honestly think sex is the ultimate expression of love that should only be shared with one person. Think it over carefully. If you had sex, and then broke up for some weird reason (unlikely, I know, but still, consider it), how would you feel? Would you feel used? I would. I'd wanna kill my guy if that happened.
It's good that you're planning to use a condom, but realize that condoms are only 97% effective. If you were on birth control, the effectiveness increases to about 99%. (Which is another reason to consider this carefully. If you got pregnant, what would this guy do? Would he sit next to you and hold your hand while you explained to your parents what happened?)
Also, make sure this is something you really want, and not something he's pushing you into.
Lessee...as far as your "does it hurt/what does it feel like" question...be warned, it DOES hurt most people the first time. If you're a little stretched out (chances are this is a no, as you're only 13), it hurts less. Like, if you use tampons, you get more stretched out. If not (this was my situation), be prepared for pain. It also depends on how big the guy is. If he's big, and you're small...baaaaaaad combination. BAAAAAAAD combination. Lol. Once you get past the pain...it's interesting. Chances are, you'll see. ^_^
I hope this helped!
-Siren =)

Cut up old magazines and make collages on posterboards - or even right on your walls, if your parents will let you. Like, LOTS of them. My boyfriend's sister did that, and her room looks awesome.
As far as places for your friends to sit when you hang out, try taking a corner of your room and gathering a bunch of pillows - line the corner with the pillows, and add extras to make it really floofy. I've been meaning to do that to my corner for ages, but keep forgetting...
Fuzzy rugs are always good - or basically anything fuzzy. But that's an opinion thing. I love fuzzy stuff.
Ooh, beanbag chairs. Those are always fun. ^_^
Hope this helped!
-Siren =)

Well, it'll be kind of hard not to hurt his feelings, as you don't return them.
However, you can let him down gently.
Remind him that he's a nice guy, but that weekend was sort of a one-time thing, and you're not looking for a solid relationship. Just be nice about it. Don't brush him off.
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

14? I'm guessing you're a freshman. Freshman year SUCKS. I spent the majority of that year upset about one thing or another. High school gets to be more fun as you get older. You're perfectly normal. I think I'd be worried if you were happy all the time, lol.
Hope this helps!
-Siren =)

I'm glad you like my column! I add columnists whose advice I feel is quality. I'll take a look at your column, but please don't be offended if you don't see yourself on my favorites list. I'm disgustingly selective. Lol.
-Siren =)

Oy vey.
Her mom needs to wake up. I'm jewish, and I've never once dated a jewish guy. "Nice jewish boys" are just really hard to find...
Maybe if her mother met Brian, she'd change her mind. Sometimes, the best way to get parents to change their mind about a guy is to have the guy change their mind.
It's always worked for me...Lol.
I hope this helps her!
-Siren =)

I'm a laid-back 26 year old with a Psychology BA, starting my MA program, and working my way into the field as quickly as I can. It took me an extra Bachelor's degree (in vocal performance and creative writing) to figure it out, but I was put on this Earth to help, to heal, and to love.

I have made the decision to dedicate my life and career to helping others. I am here to do just that.

I've been a member since 2004, and since I signed up, I've gone through quite a lot and learned quite a lot from it. I'm here to give guidance where I had none; no one should have to go through the difficulties I went through alone.

Feel free to visit my website/blog, if you want to read my experience with domestic violence and my thoughts on it.

***While I do tend to answer mental health and other health-related or medicine-related questions, I am by NO MEANS a licensed physician or practitioner of any sort. Any and all advice I give for these questions is from my own experience or studies.***

If you need to get a hold of me quickly, my screen name on AIM is SirenCytherea. Just let me know you found me here.

I'm a strong believer in the idea that there are no stupid questions except the ones left unasked, so, please, keep an open mind, heart, and mouth.

Siren

Website:
Gender:
Age:
AIM:
Member Since:
Answers:
Last Update:
Visitors:
Main Categories:




Favorite Columnists