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Website:

Venomous Enterprises

Gender:

Female

Occupation:

Recording Artist

Yahoo:

Sophia_pettus@yahoo.com or Venomous_Venom

Member Since:

May 16, 2008

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309

Last Update:

August 1, 2011

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about

I was on this site before recording my first single. I will stay a member of this site. I am asking that each of you support me by visiting my webpage. I have posted music that I have written and recorded. Check out Wildside featuring Father Jah, and I want, created in memory of 2Pac.
http://www.reverbnation.com/Venomtheonly1

I am open, honest, truthful yet also insightful and understanding. I am a Strong woman with morals, belief, and character. I value life, myself and life of everything, everyone and all. I am mature, caring, giving, straight up and real!

I am not harsh, rude, or disrespectful but I am going to tell you the truth because you are asking for that. If you want a lie or support that you know is invalid because you question it yourself, please don't get mad at me for the truth because that is what sets us ALL free!! Peace, Venom

advice

Let's just say, girl I used to date hates me, I sometimes hate her, but I really want to bury the hatchet and at least be friends, despite the years of non-speaking and such.

How do I manage to explain my intent and actually make it heard without some kind of issue?

Write a poem and put it in her mailbox. Put a friendship necklace in the envelope. Ask her to call you to disucss your feelings and her feelings. In the letter tell her how you are feeling, what you want from her, ask her to forgive you, and try not to play the blame game or discuss what happened to cause the actual funk- just apologize. UNLESS you have an order of no contact. "smile".. It's mature to prevent an arguement and it allows you to get out your feelings without being interrupted and it puts the ball back in her hand to contact you IF she wants to talk. If she doesn't cool, you told her how you are feeling.

please. i am a christian teen and it is so hard to resist certain things. ok. i look at certain things on the computer and i am ashamed. i shouldn't be doing that. what should i do to resist the temptation or just stop the addiction all in all?
please help me!!!

It is a sin to view certain things on the internet, so you are correct in calling it a sin. First, know this, ALL have sinned and come short of the Glory of God. God is a forgiving God. This is why his son died on the cross for our sins. Repent to God for your sin, ask him to forgive you yet also give you strength to overcome this habit. Mentally - tell yourself that this is something that could grow into a worst habit like a drug and you want to overcome it now before it overcomes you. This could prevent future habits in the same area but differently. Spiritually- Don't allow it to manifest. There is another sin associated with this also, knowing you are doing a sin and then continuing to do it. It's normal to be curious but abnormal to lust. Good luck dear heart and I am praying for your strength also. God is with you.

ok so here i go my so called bestie is flirting with my boyfriend and hes a huge flirt hes been with her befor and broke it offcuz she kissed another girl but im afraid hes still got feelings for her how do i tell her o stop with out getting her peeved

Ps. she is realy sookie

He too is to blame for being a flirt not just her. First tell her that you don't appreciate her actions and that it is becoming a hindering to your friendship and relationship. Ask him to chill on the flirting and respect you. Should your requests be taken as a joke, cut them both off as they mean harm to you and no good and use better judgment in friends and boyfriends in the future.

Love yourself more so that you are concerned about your feelings and not someone getting upset about them being wrong. Speak up for yourself and this thing will go on and on when you are older. Those who stand for nothing, fall for anything. Remember that dearheart and good luck!!!

Hi, my relationship is somehow difficult and complicated. It's hard to explain.
I met this girl 4 months ago. We officially went to bf and gf after 2 weeks or so. We had a great time, till I had to go back to Europe. Before I left we decided that she moves to me to Europe to stay with me and learn german,...,...

The first couple weeks went great. She told me that she loves me all the time and that I'm so different and I'm the one. I got a lot of emails and she was getting in contact with me all the time. After like 6 weeks everything changed, she did not call that often anymore; she did not say I love you anymore. She started to see her exboyfriend again, but she told me every time she saw him (why would she tell me that, if she would have feelings for him she prob. wouldn't tell me) She told me I just care about him, and he invited me to this and that. I know a long distance relationship is not easy, so I decided to fly over. She was very very happy to see me, she was so nice to me in front of all her friends. But the 2nd night we were talking about us. She always blocks and doesn't want to speak about it. I asked her what she feels for her ex. She was I don't know. The thing is, he's almost double her age and I think she doesn't know what that means if you ever want to have family or children (Of course it's possible, but just more complicated). They broke up because she thought they are too different and he never paid attention to her. Now, since he knows she has me, he calls her 24/7 even night time. I know he called all the time and she called him too when I was there. But I do not know what that exactly means, I told her I do not like it. She told me, I can't say what she can and what not (Which is true) I just don't like it. She was: He calls me once a day, that's it. The I asked her so, what's up with us? She told me she loves me, but she is not in love with me, she barely knows me and I went away for 2 months. She is not ready to move in with me she thinks, or she is just way to scared, she was, what if it is not working out? Also she told me she needs her free space, but she does not have that when she's living with me. Also I souldnt call her all the time, she feels controlled and needs space. I call her normally once a day, that's it, I do not think that is too much. what does that mean? I know she is really really afraid of commitment, her earlyer b'friends did hurt her a lot when they broke up and they cheated on her and stuff. So I can understand that it is not easy for her. She told me she never going to trust a guy again. I also started to think that she's maybe tying to protect herself by not letting her feelings out and trust, because she is afraid to get hurt again.
I did not know what to say and we went on for the next day. The next day a friend of her told me, you know she wants to argue with her boyfriends and she needs sometimes to be in a little fight. She always had bad luck with boyfriends, but he thinks that there are some girls they need that. The next day, exactly that happened (unplanned). We went out and in the middle of the party she told me, you know, we just had fun in the beginning, not more. I was like, what are you talking about! I know she was in love then with me, so why is she saying that. So I left and went drinking with one of her girlfriend. After a while I went back to de dancefloor and tried to dance with her. She blocked me off completely, so I left again and went back to drinking with some friends. At the end of the evening she jelled at me why I left the dancefloor and and and. The next day we went to six flags, in the car she was sooo angry about what happened yesterday. She told me she spoke with a good friend the whole night and she wanted to break up with me and though my stuff out of the apartment today. She told me: seriously, I do not think it's working out, we are just too different. But her friend could convince her not to break up and wait till the end of the week, because I just came over because of her. She hasn't broken up with me yet, and I'm back since 3 days. She also told me in the car that she normally does not give 2nd chances. I was like ok. Why is she giving me a 2nd chance when she doesn't know what she wants or feels? We had another great rest of the week. We had a lot of fun and I had the feeling she is happy with me and feels something for me, she liked to hug me and and and. So I thought there is something, otherwise she could just say, you know I break up. I could feel that she likes me. Before I left she also gave me some of her cloths to bring to Europe and I met her mother and brother for dinner. Why would she introduce me to her family if she s not in love with me? I asked her before her mom and her brother came to the restaurant, why are you bringing me to a dinner when you want to break up anyway. We do not have to do that. She was, I wouldn't bring you here if I would break up with you. (I ---> confused!)
The day when I was back in Switzerland she skyped with me and her mom and brother was around too. Why would she do that if she is not sure about us?
I just do not know what to think, I'm somewhat confused. Maybe someone can give me some advice or advice. I can not talk about it with her, she blocks all the time.
She also told me she is really really afraid that when she is moving over that it will not work out and she doesn't know if she is ready to live with me, it's a huge comitment for her.

I mean I think there are signs that tell me, she is not loving you and she wants to break up. On the other hand she does always things that keep you on believe, oh, maybe she really cares and just doesn't want to show it because she doesn't want to get hurt when she goes 100% for it.
I also think I souldn't call that much within the next few weeks, just to give her her space and to see. I'm just afraid that if I do not call, that she just thinks, okey that's it. No one calls so we just leave it like that. I called her on Monday when I arrived at the airport, then we skyped Monday night. Now it's Wednesday and I haven't heard from her. I know that is maybe just me, but I need a certain degree of commitment.

Thankfull for any advice, I will add some more input later.

Greetings from Switzerland

talk with her and advise of how you are feeling. Be sure to explain that these aren't just insecurities, these are actual responses based on her actions, her words and her distance. Gain clarity in order for you to receive clarification in addition to closure. You can't force anyone to want you or treat you the way you want to be treated. If she doesn't want you, or if she is torn between her ex and you, let that go so that you don't tear yourself behind her being torn.

I agree about providing space, but not before providing clarification in order to be on the same page. No comment or conversation explaining where you are emotionally or what your next step of action is symbolizes a coward avoiding a situation and you are not a coward! Good luck sweetness and love yourself! I hope all works out according to your desires and wishes for the betterment of you as a person.

you answered my question before...

you said someone you knew got 2 can goods and laid on her back and raised them. do you mean she like lifted them like weights and it made her boobs smaller?

*also thank you soo much for your advice before :D

I thought I answered this way earlier.If I didn't, I am so sorry... Yes she raised them like weights and her breasts got smaller and firmer.

My best friend and I are fighting over a boy in school. My friend and him are kind of popular and I am not. I really want to have him as my boyfriend but I don't think he likes me. Should I let my friend have the boy? Or if I have a chance, should I do everything I can to make him like me. But if I get but if I get the boy do you think my friend will be friends with me?

Never lose a friendship over a boy. Friends are hard to find, boys come a dime a dozen. Think about it. How would you feel if the shoe were on the other foot and your friend wanted your man? It wouldn't be cool, would it? If you do take him, consider losing your friend, AND HURTING your friend. Also, look into self, do you only want him because he is popular? If so, don't do that. Find your self on your own by seeking your own identity. By doing this, you find your own man, your own happiness without the reputation of being a back stabber or a fake friend who isn't trustworthy. Good luck and you are better than that!

First of all, i'm 18 years old (female). I haven't had a serious boyfriend in over 2 years. that's not the problem. anyways, i have dated a lot of guys. usually, girls like guys who open the door for them, compliment them, call them baby and stuff like that, and want guys who won't just use them for sex. ok, i hate all that. i hate talking on the phone with guys and i hate when guys will do anything for you. it seems like i would rather have sex with a guy that will use me instead of dating a nice guy. whats wrong with me??

Dear heart, there is nothing wrong with you. I understand what you are going through in your thoughts. It is called the good guy/bad boy syndrome. Usually at the age you are, values, morals and demand isn't socially accepted, appreciated or understood. We as women tend to be attracted to men who aren't gentlemen, but thuggish. Thuggish in dress, thuggish meaning the opposite of respectful.

Start first trying to date guys who will open doors, speak to you with respect and like you for you - important: you aren't respecting yourself by SETTLING for anything less than a gentleman. You will appreciate it more as you get older. Start respecting self more by wanting more for yourself differing from sex only. There are some good guys out there, try giving one of them a chance. You aren't a door mat!

So this guy I was going out with during Summer 06 just reconnected with me about a week ago. It was really random, but we just started talking about how we used to be so close two years before, although he has a girlfriend.
And he said, "I think I'm going to break up with her. I really like you. I want to be with you."
But then he decided he wanted to stay with her. I was basically led on, and I don't know how he feels anymore but he has a girlfriend when he told me he liked me still. I don't know what to do or where I stand, I already explained to him how I felt and it wasn't fair, and he just said he was sorry about it but there was nothing he could do. It's tough, bc he won't talk to me the same anymore.
I don't really know what to do. Should I give up on him or what?

UM... if he has a girlfriend already and didn't break up with her, that means he isn't available for you, and it also means that you have to find your own man. You don't want anyone else's man girl! For what?! ALSO, if he did break up with her for you, what makes you think he wouldn't eventually break up with you for someone else, hell if not even her!? Real talk..

I understand that you don't know how he feels anymore but truth be told it doesn't even matter because it's just talk with no action - so, yes you should give up on him. first reason, he had a girlfriend when he told you he liked you. second reason, he has a girlfriend now. Third reason, he has led you on. Now, I think that he and his girlfriend were into it, and they were about to break up (which would make you a rebound chic in his eyes, which you aren't!!!), hooked up with you to try to get over his girlfriend OR to make her jealous, and then hooked back up with her and then dumped you. Anyway, this is how the bull shit starts off, so don't even go there and do that OK? Don't play the game with this dude or any other dudes- YOU ARE BETTER THAN THAT..
GOOD LUCK!

Venom

14/f im going on a movie date tonight, our first one acctual and I need tips :) whats cute, whats attractive. What would be an appropiate movie for us to see tonight. We've hung out alot so a kiss wouldnt be out of the question so all tips and advice would be great!!

AW... I remember my first date - that's cute in itself! "smile"

just be yourself girl.. Don't wear anything revealing, so that you don't send the wrong message. OK? you feel me? A nice pair of jeans with a cute baby tee is cute, with a pair of sandals with a bit of a heel on them (if you wear those) try not to over do your make up.. Natural looks are really cute and attractive - it doesn't take from who you are or add to what you are either. Keep it real!

Go on line together, check out what movies are playing and then you both decide on what you want to watch,don't you make the decision and don't let him make it either, make it together..when you get there, just be who you are, enjoy the movie and have fun. Don't be scared to talk! talking is good, it allows openess to learn one another. "smile" Don't rush anything, take it slow so that you two establish a friendship in your dating and respect too..

HAVE FUN!!!!

Well i've liked this guy forever, And I am pretty sure he liked me too. We always flirted like non stop. But now summer is coming and I can tell we are trying to keep in contact with eachother (it's hard considering he doesn't have a phone) Anyway We talked online EVERYDAY Since schools let out. Then one night, I imed him and I was like "Omg joshh!" And he was like "yo" And then I was like "Omg, I just watched the scariest movie and I'm home alone and freaking out" And he was like "cool" And i was like "not really" And then he just signed off. It was so odd, he's never like that and he always says bye to me and i figured he would be there for me or something. So I just thought to myself, 'okay I don't know what i did for him to act like that so when he is ready to talk I will let him I/M me next time' Well, We haven't talked in 8 days because he Hasn't imed me. Honestly, he used to always i/m me until that ONE NIGHT I IMED HIM! What the heck did i do? And what the heck do i do?! help! Thanks so much

Girl, we will NEVER understand guys, hell even with me being 34,I still don't get some of things they say and do.

Why haven't you gotten in touch with him just to see what the hell his problem is. It could've been a bad connection or something. Ask him if he got your last IM before he signed off. It is best not to just assume that he's tripping (which he most likely his tripping!) but anyway, let's give him the benefit of the doubt first. So, try to find out what the deal is and then if he still acts like that upon you trying to resolve the possible problem, if there is one, then cut him off!!! Doesn't matter who IM's or contacts who first for real, it's all about the communication girl - regardless of who makes it first, Now, onc it has been made and you still feel funny or like he's being weird, then don't IM him anymore until he IM's you back.. you feel me??

Hey, good luck and you didn't do anything!!! "smile"

okay so i started dating this guyy last saturday so we only dated for 6 days. it really wasnt serious or anything but todayy we were texting and i got a text from him and goes "me neither but i think i wanna break up with 1 for 2 because i really like her"(1 is me, 2 is my friend) and i didnt think he meant to send it to me. i was like k and he didnt reaslize he said it so i go u like 2 he goes as a friend i go what about that last text he goes shit its confusig im like youu like her i get it. and he kept saying he likes both of us and blah blah blahhhh well its weird bc she .. WAS one of my best friends and i dunno. i broke up with him. 2 found out and got soooo amd at me and now wont talk to me. wsas it wrong for me to break up with him and should she be mad at me?

GOOD JOB, and yes you should have broken up with him! He was trying to be sneaky and you don't deserve someone who is trying to play you as if you're stupid because you aren't!

Who does he think he is? Girl, I am glad you called him out on it because he was going to try to break up with you or try to play you. I don't know 2 is mad. She should be at him, not you! I noticed you said WAS, which is past tense, so are you two not cool anymore? She shouldn't be mad at you!

This woman I work with is "sort of" my superior (i work for an employee owned company) and I tried being friends with her but do not like her. Everything she does at work is so backwards and the truth is before I went on a one year leave, I had her position and did it 100 times better. (anyone would agree so I am not just being conceited). Lately it has been so bad though that she snaps at work over the slightest thing and freaks out on me and another worker. she talks bad about everyone and is generally unpleasant. I cannot stand going to my job I would normally like because of her. I posted a question about this situation a few months back and mostly heard that I should find a new job. I make twice as much here as I would somewhere else so that is not an option. I have considered asking to move to another crew, but she would find out and really that would NOT be good, also there probably isnt a space for me elsewhere at the moment. Any advice would help, thanks

Co-workers/friends - 2 different things. Check it out: I have had people at many jobs I have had try to make friends with me, but I tell them up front that I am not here to make friends, so there are no misunderstandings. I am here to get a paycheck only. Reason why is b/c when friends are superiors, things change (unintended), people notice it and it causes funk. Also, because it causes situations as you have now, "I have considered asking to move to another crew, but she would find out and really that would NOT be good" - see what I'm saying.

Outside of work: talk to her. Let her know you understand her frustrations, but you don't understand the reason for the attitude, and let her know that the job is coming in between your friendship and that you are going to take a little time to yourself to sort some things out.

Step away from HER, not the job! don't let anyone come in between your money girl! Next, check to see if any openings are available inside and/or outside of the company, if there are, apply! If there aren't stay, and decide if you would be happier there or elsewhere. If you think you would be happier, else where then start looking. Being that you are already gainfully employed, it's in your hand and you can be selective in regards to the pay.

It's hard to not get to the point of disliking a job b/c of other people, but the bigger picture is that those people put their pants on just like you do which makes them no better than you regardless of the title they hold and no one has the right to snap or disrespect you. So, call it out (professionally), call her off to the side or whoever it is, and let them know that you don't appreciate whatever happened or was said and that you would appreciate it if it doesn't happen again, and DOCUMENT IT! It's not being personal, it's business. Once these matters are addressed you will like your job again. If you feel over looked or taken advantage of with the whole doing a better job than she does deal, then start looking for another job, but know that this type of crap in jobs happen everyday. There is always someone there who deserves the job but has to prove themself 10 times harder to be noticed or awarded for that fact, so it doesn't matter where you go to work, it will happen again. So, I say stick it out, but stand up for yourself and back away from the superior friend. Hell, that last part sounds a work out a little bit huh? LOL
Anyway, good luck girl and I know you will do what's best for you!!

My friend (15/F) is definitely over weight. I know that nobody's perfect, and stuff. But she's at the point where it's a potential health risk! It could possibly be my fault for not helping her earlier, but I can't exactly change that now.

Her parents don't exactly help, though. Her dad makes unhealthy, meaty, casseroles almost every night. So, she isn't used to eating healthy foods. And I guess she's too oblivious to notice what she's eating.

Her parents also pressure her a lot. For example, there isn't a waking moment when her dad isn't nagging about some sort of walking. To be blunt, both of her parents are always reminding her of her obesity.

She has a short attention span, and gets annoyed by anything repetitive in the least bit. So, repeating exercises makes her walk away.

She recently bought a Jane Fonda exercise tape, which she used when she was younger to lose weight (which worked). She is convinced that only that exercise tape will work. After a month, she still hasn't received the tape (yes, I'm sure that she did order it).

My question is: how do I help her lose weight without being too pushy? Or should I just wait for the tape? But what if it takes months before she gets the tape?

Also: she will do almost anything I say, as long as it's not too harsh. So, obedience isn't an issue. She's just really impatient and ADD.

SORRY for the massive question! I tried to make it easier to read! Thank you for any answers!

Well, let's see.. FIRST you're right there is no need to be pushy, bossy or controlling just because you have a great influence on her. Since you hang with her, why not suggest eating salads on the nights you're over there, instead of what her dad fixed.

There's dance videos that help with excercising - My favorite one is hip hop abs - it's all that, these videos are actually teaching how to dance at the same time, it's not the same ole' school excercises.

You can also make suggestions, like hey, let's go walking at the park today or tomorrow and see what's going on there. I know our parks here are all that and I go all the time and walk. Basically, be supportive of her and there for her too, doing these activities with her. I am sure she will appreciate the time being spent and not take it the hard way. You can even tell her that you are trying to tone up yourself and ask if she will do it with you. keyword is togetherness -

good luck and you're a good friend to be concerned and supportive regarding your friend!

my best friend and i turn 18 exactly two weeks apart, so we're throwing a birthday shindig for both of us combined. we're having it at this big multi-purpose lodge thing, so it'll most likely be a dance. problem is, we want a theme. not anything like "hawaiian" or whatever, just something simple. we wanted to do a neon theme- where everyone wears neon colors and we get glow sticks and all that, but another girl just threw one of those. and we've agreed black & white parties are too overdone. we want something simple & original. any ideas?!

Why not have a PJ party, where everyone wheres pajamas and house shoes! it's laid back, chill and actually really cute! I remember we did it in college! We had fun!

I am a 17 year old girl, and ever since I was 14, I felt like I have been falling down a hill. It seems like it gets worse month by month. I feel bad about myself a lot, but I randomly feel better. But then a week later I am back where I started. I have no warning about when I will feel bad again. I want to know if so much pain is normal for a teenager.

I used to cut when I was 15, but I do it extremely rarely now. Starting this past March, I wasn't eating properly because I was trying to lose weight. I got down to eating between 500 and 1200 calories a day, depending on the day. When I was 16, I almost killed myself, and once this year I tried alcohol for the first time.

It just seems like I am falling and being so much worse than I ever was. I just want to know if feeling like this is normal (even if what I did isn't normal) or if I should get this checked out. (If that is the option, do you have any idea what might be wrong with me?)

Thank you for all your help in advance, and I look forward to reading your input.

I answered your email, please check your spam mail too if you don't see it in your inbox.

First, I am going to tell you that I am so sorry that you are going through this, girl and that I want to help you, as these should be the best friends of your life!

I am not able to say if it's normal or not, but I can say that I am seeing more of it on a daily basis. I really do think that you should get this checked out. Something is going on internally with you and I respect you for identifying it and seeking help even to the point of asking if you should get it checked out. This shows me strength within you! So, this tells me you can get through this thing, with help girlfriend. No one on this site can say what's wrong unless they are doctors, and see you. Most will say depression. I am not going to say depression, because it could be anger, frustration, confusion - all of these things help lead up to depression but without really knowing the real root of it,it's hard to say what it is. It could even be a mental disorder, requiring medication. It could be something hereditary even. I will say this, I will give you my email address,you can email me and tell me everything you want to get out, I don't care how long it is, I will read it and answer you, I promise you. Sophia_pettus@yahoo.com

My advice, is talking first with your parents to let them know that you're going through doing, asking them to make you an appointment for help. Next, you can send me an email message and let it out!! and we can talk from there too. I will be here for you cause you need someone there for you in addition to your parents, doctor and/or counselor.

I am also praying for you as soon as I post this response to you. Again, I am asking and supporting you in getting this checked out miss lady so that you can smile again and realize the world is yours and it's waiting on you to grab a hold of it!

When i first met her i began to have butterflies every time i saw her. when we first tease each other and played around my feelings began to grow. when she kept leaning on me i couldnt stop thinking about her. when she gave me pet names i began to blush. she is my frist girl crush. but i couldnt take the confusion anymore. i told her my feelings and she said that she is unsure of her sexuality and not ready for a relationship. i never ask her out but told her that i am bi and i like her. then when i met some guy at a party she got jealous. she said "i dont know if i should be pissed or happy for you" "time will tell for the both of us" i was confused. i ask her if she like me and she ignore the note. i ask again up front she ingore the question, but shook her head no. 2 weeks ago i ask her again in a text and she said "not as of now sorry i see you as a sister" i want to move on becuase she still flirts and confuses me. i dont know what to do.

The reason why i ask her if she like me was because she flirts with me sometimes. the 1st time i ask her that question was last year. then 2 weeks ago this year i ask again. and when she said she was jealous she even said that she was jealous of my last two boyfriends. i want to move on because i dont want to fall for a best friend. i know her for 7 years. and we are both bi curious (she told me she is). we are 21.

I kind of see things differently:

Because someone is confused about their sexuality, doesn't give them the right to play with someone's feelings or interest in them especially if that person has told them that they like them. You feel me? Hell,either she is bi-curious and interested or she's not. It's no reason to flirt around with you, lead you on or even send mixed emotions. You are 21 years old and you are grown now, you played mattel games as a child, right?

If you want to move on, do it- especially if you see that it's going to go nowhere with her. Seriously. Anyway, talk to her one more time(not even asking if she likes you and all that because you shouldn't have to chase or sweat anybody, regardless of how you feel about them)- let her know that you would like for her to stop flirting, and sharing her jealousy with you if she isn't going to act on it - because it's simply playing silly games and you are too old for it. Tell her you all can still be cool and that you aren't mad at her, you just need to gain some clarity for yourself so that you can move on and so that you both are on the same page.

Falling for a best friend is OK, good and cool, the problem is when that best friend isn't there to catch you when you fall! Tell her you are straight up and like straight up comments - all that "time will tell mess" isn't direct and gives no direction either so I can understand why you were confused. I would be too. On your behalf, it isn't fair to be confused due to someone else verses being confused by your self. OK?

Good Luck girl, be happy and I hope you get whatever it is that you want to make you happy and keep you happy but most importantly aware!

This guy that I met about a year ago got my # and started texting me a lot, but I was already in a relatinship at the time. When my relationship ended, about two weeks later he asked me to hang out with him. Well, it ended up we started dating but only for a month and then he dumped me and gave me a stupid reason for it. We still talked after that, but only as friends.

Just recently, he asked if I was seeing anyone and I told him about the guy I just started dating a couple weeks ago. That's when he told me the "true" reason he dumped me before, in which it was not really his fault, but he was extremely apologetic. And then he asked if we could start over, but I told him I had moved on, and so he said that whatever happens will happen.

The problem is, now he texts/calls me pretty consistently throughout the day, as if I am all he thinks about. Is it possible that this guy could just be trying to get back with me because he wants sex? Because when we were dating, he would bring it up and I would tell him I wanted to wait. My first inclination was that he was only in it for sex, but now that I think about it, if he only wanted sex, then he wouldn't be spending all this time waiting on me because there's plenty of girls willing to hook up with a guy around here. Should I consider him?

Don't let anyone have the authority to come in and out of your life. It's confusing, inconsiderate and it's hurtful to you.

The sex thing: you said - "My first inclination was that he was only in it for sex, but now that I think about it, if he only wanted sex, then he wouldn't be spending all this time waiting on me because there's plenty of girls willing to hook up with a guy around here" - this is true, but you know what? he could be utilizing all of his options too, and maybe he has now pulled your lucky number and you're next, and then when he's ready to pull the next number, he may break up with you again and pull her number. So, don't fall for the BS Girl! it becomes a damn cycle! Since he told you the "true" reason for breaking up - FINALLY, that means he lied to you about the reason he broke up with you the first time. Don't let him dump you a second time. 1st time, shame on them, 2nd time, shame on you.

or he could be the type that doesn't want you and doesn't want anyone else to have you either. So, don't take him back, make your relationship work that you are in.

Good Luck and remember you are smarter, wiser and better than that.

me and my boyfriend has been together for a year now. he has changed alot. when he is out with his friends and i call him, he tells me that he is busy and can't talk. but that really doesn't make since to me because he turns around a text me. i feel like if you are busy then how can u take out the time to text me but you are busy. it's takes more time to text then to actually talk to him. so should i suspect that he is cheating. he also acts very differnt towards me too.

I can't tell you not to over react, because it has happened to me and the son of a - never mind, was actually cheating! If you think someone is cheating on you, they most likely are. You wouldn't be thinking it for any reason. There are always signs of cheating, that are easily picked up on. If you have noticed changes in actions especially towards you, something is going on - may not be cheating, but SOMETHING is going on.

If anything has happened to cause you to not trust as you once did (being that you are questioning if you're being cheated on), be aware and not blinded. I agree with you, it takes more time to text than talk! There is no reason not to talk unless he can't be heard talking to you out loud- you have intuition, emotional feelings, as well as gut feelings, until shown differently and given ACTUAL reason to believe differently, LISTEN TO THEM. They are there for a reason and it doesn't matter if you been with someone for one year or 20 years, it doesn't change. Talk to him and see what the hell his problem is, and let him how you feel and watch his reaction, that too will let you know what you need to know so that you can do what you got to do!

Good Luck, and I hope he isn't cheating on you,because it hurts like hell! Stay up on it and be aware at all times, don't slip and get caught up or made to look stupid!

My ex boyfriend moved to Sweden for two years, and we've talked on msn every day and stuff, and now he's moved back to our town.
I was so fucking happy when he called me and said ''I'm back in town, let's meet at Starbucks at 12''
So I go there to meet him, and I didn't see him anywhere.
I look around and there's a guy waving at me.
And I did a double take.
Before he left, he had blonde hair, messy, some piercings, and gauged ears.
Now, he has black long hair, more piercings and something that makes me want to cry, he's gauged his center lip piering to a 00g
( like this guy's lip:
http://www.bmezine.com/pierce/05-lips/A80502/high/npqe-rafa-e-dessa-9829.jpg)

Meanwhile I've had some boyfriends, and he's had some girlfriends, but I wanted to start dating him again.
But now...I feel so unattracted to him :(
I mean, I can't even kiss him. And he talks all weird.
And he's changed too. He's obsessed with gauging his lip now, and he thinks I should gauge my lip too.

What do I do now?
I still love him, but I feel like I love him as a friend, and he wants to get back together.

Help?

Damn! Damn! Damn! Girl, do not change for him, change for you! If you aren't into what he has gotten into then don't be, or you will lose who you are and never do that for ANYONE but yourself OK? That's the first thing.

Second thing: Let him know that you have changed since he left and that you don't feel the same way anymore and that you only wish to be friends with him. Don't be rude telling him that his new found interests don't appeal to you, or that you aren't attracted to him anymore - that's hurtful moreso than telling him you only want to be friends with him. If a guy is into something you aren't into, and you try to accept it,yet still have awkard feelings about it or questions instead of certainty, you will eventually settle. You can accept anything you want, but never settle for anything.

Good Luck and keep it real girl! Let him do him, and you do you. You will be much happier this way.

I have an annoying friend and she always talks about her self. I like her because we are besties, but she only talks about HER and what she will be doing and who she talked to and blah blah blah... Everytime I talk about me or anything other than her she changes the subject or doesn't listen to me. She also would ditch me to sit at the back of the class or with cooler people, and she doesn't care if i end up sitting by myself. Please help me, I don't know how to let her know she is making me angrier every day. What should I say to her?

PS. I have tried talking to her about it but she refused to listen and wouldn't take in what I was saying.

A friend is someone who listens to you as well as you listening to them. A friend doesn't ditch a friend, unless that friend is being worrisome and doesn't provide personal space or time for that friend to have. Now, if this isn't the case, and your friend is only acknowledging herself, she's selfish and isn't a friend. If you have talked to her already and tried to tell her how you felt and she refused to listen to you, that means again she's selfish AND self centered. No one can have a friendship when there is only one friend. Right? So, Instead of letting her know how angry you are,let her know how tired you are and find more friends that find you interesting, and want to talk WITH you and not just TO you. Find friends that want to sit with you and do care if you sit by yourself or not, and if they are true friends, you wouldn't sit by yourself.

Good Luck, and take all of this as a learning lesson even if you're feelings are hurt a little bit. You will find good friends and you will be happier.

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