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Would you have sex with a fat ugly girl? (link)
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I wouldn't have sex with a girl who considered herself too fat and ugly to be attractive. In order for me to feel that kind of affection and desire for someone, she has to like herself and feel a certain amount of confidence. If she's convinced that she's too fat and ugly to be desirable... then she's right. And I certainly wouldn't have sex with a woman who thought I was doing it out of pity, or who was convinced that I was cringing away from her because she's so fat and ugly.
That having been said, I do need to feel a certain degree of physical attraction to a woman before I can get turned on by her. But it's amazing how much of someone's beauty comes from how they carry themselves and how confident they are.
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I'm not one to complain...and I'm fat...but my gran is gettin a tad bit too thin! She's a diabetic..and I was wondering what could 'fatten' her up. Like something that will make her put on the pounds?
Thankies! (link)
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Your grandmother is, in all probability, at least 40 years older than you. As a matter of practicality, she's unlikely to take nutritional advice from you seriously, so I doubt it will do either of you much good for you to offer it.
If she's diabetic, then she's seeing a doctor regularly. Let him worry about it; that's his job. This is someplace where your opinion is probably just not welcome.
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well alright the other night me and my boyfriend were planning on having sex. I was prepared, or so i thought. I expected sex to hurt since i was still a virgin and all but it hurt way more than i could take. As a result i pushed him back and we tried again. But i was in so much pain i couldnt do it. After he felt like it was all his fault and i know its all mine. he thought he pressured me into it and i told him that it just was not enjoyable for me and it was extremely painful. He got all quiet and i tried to kiss him, he didnt kiss back. Later we were talking and he said i just feel like i ruined my chance with you. I was overcome with saddness and found myself in tears that i could not control. He then felt like a complete jerk and started blaming himself and telling me i am the only girl he ever had loved also that if i didnt want we dont have to have sex. What should i do about this? (link)
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Obviously, this was a trial for both of you. You can get through it, though; it's just going to take some emotional fortitude, some mutual understanding, and some lube.
First of all, it is not all his fault, nor is it yours. It is the nature of things. The fact that you couldn't do it is NOBODY'S fault. Neither of you should feel guilty or like you failed. Doing anything for the first time is not easy - why should sex be any different? Take heart in the fact that you both love each other enough not to blame the other, and try not to blame yourselves either.
Right now, he feels like dirt because he hurt you - not intentionally of course, but you were in pain and he was the cause of it. This is a very difficult position for a decent guy to be in, especially when the goal was to give both of you pleasure. In spite of all the reassurance, he's feeling tremendous guilt. He will be able to get over it with your help, some of which you have already given.
Naturally, this is difficult for you as well. Here you wanted to be able to share this wonderful intimacy with your boyfriend, and you end up betrayed by the harsh reality that the first time hurts. He needs to help you through this too, and the best way he can do that is by accepting that he is NOT to blame, that there is no blame to be assigned here, that this is just something you'll both need to figure out.
You both need to get through the emotional fallout from this before attempting sex again. If you do intend to try again, tell him that you want to and that together you can make it happen. The two of you need to both find your way to the conclusion that something like this, which is NOBODY'S fault, should not be the end of a loving a mutually caring relationship.
Now, insofar as practical advice for how to try again when the time comes, here are some ideas:
(1) Lube. Use KY jelly or another water-based lubricant. DO NOT USE VASELINE - it erodes latex condoms and can breed bacteria, as it does not wash away afterward.
(2) Positioning. Consider trying it with you on top. That way, you are in total control, and you can slow way down if it begins to hurt too much. It will also lessen his "guilt factor".
(3) Consider that he may be too large for you, at least for now. You don't have to take him "all the way". Just go as far as it is comfortable for you. As time goes on, you'll be able to handle more, until it's all about the pleasure and the pain is a distant memory.
Good luck to you both!
(One more thing which I feel obligated to say: If either or both of you is under the age of 16, then you're too young to be doing this. Especially if you are, you may not be done growing and may be physically unprepared to enjoy sex no matter what else you do. And make sure you're using protection, even if you're both virgins - pregnancy CAN happen even on the very first time.)
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Ok so I know when anybody says "I have a friend who..." they mean themselves. but im really talking about someone else here
so my friend travis and i were talking about taking midterms next week, and he said he heard about people taking chap stick and running it across the little black bars to make all the answers correct. i know it sounds stupid for me to ask this, but is he right? because there IS a possibility, but if its not true i dont want him to fail his exams, because he would have just wrote down random answers and used the chap stick.
please help me out (link)
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I am Sabine's friend, who worked the OMR machine in college. She's right - there is absolutely no way to fool the machine into giving you a better score. There are plenty of ways to make it give you a worse score, or a zero, or a rejection.
The little black bars are timing marks. The machine "watches" them go through so it knows which line is being scanned. Nothing having to do with grading takes place in that area of the sheet.
It's a very simple machine, essentially; it looks for black marks in the right places on a sheet. If it finds them in the right places, it does nothing. If it fails to find them in the right places, or finds multiple marks where there should be only one, it marks them wrong. There is literally no way to fool the machine into giving you a better score. The best you could hope for is that the machine would reject the sheet, in which case it would be looked over by a human being who would catch whatever it was you were trying to do.
Furthermore, if by some miracle there WERE a way to fool the machine, it wouldn't stay secret for long and the machine manufacturers would fix the flaw so that it wouldn't work anymore.
There's no way to cheat the scantron. Please tell your friend not to ruin everyone else's test sheets by gumming up the works with Chapstick; he'll probably not only fail the course and be expelled for trying to cheat, but he'll be financially responsible for fixing a $200,000 scanner.
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17/f
me and my boyfriend have sex and we never use protection we already know we're going to be together forever.. that every one can tell! and we have been going out for about a yr. he always precums but inside me and i havent got pregnant yet he has never cam inside me though. and i want to know how you can tell your pregnant right away!! like a day after what are the symptoms. (link)
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You're playing Russian Roulette here; "pulling out" is not an effective means of birth control. Every time you do it, you're running a roughly 25% chance of getting pregnant.
There are no consistent symptoms that occur the day after conception. You will need to take a pregnancy test, and even those generally aren't very accurate so soon.
If you don't want to have a pregnancy to deal with, change your habits. At 17, you may be prepared to be with your boyfriend forever, but I doubt you're prepared for motherhood.
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Hey. i noticed that your a guy and you give good advice lol. Anyways.. i was wondering, whats a good way to meet someone that you see all the time but never talked to? Theres this guy at my middle school and i see him alot but inever talked to him n i really want to meet him. I dont want to look stuid and just say "HI!" randomly. What do guys perfer? How should i start a converstaion?
HELP PLEASE!! (link)
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I'll do what I can. I haven't been in middle school for almost twenty years, and while I was there, I didn't talk to as many girls as I might have liked.
One way to go about it would be to find out something in particular that he's interested in - for instance, say he's into photography. Then what you do is: You and a friend pass by him and you say something like, "Oh, he'll know - excuse me, we heard you're a photographer, and I'm getting some portraits done, so I was wondering if you had any tips or anything?"
At this point, your friend helpfully says, "I gotta go, see you later!" and walks on, leaving you talking with him. Guys love to talk about their hobbies, so just listen for a bit and ask "out of curiosity" what he likes about it, that kind of thing (try not to rehearse questions in advance; it'll make you sound phony). Where the conversation goes from there is up to both of you, but that's one way to get your foot in the door. And don't forget to introduce yourself at some point!
After that, you'll be able to say "Hi" to him in a not-random way; after all, you know each other now. With any luck, you'll find that conversation eventually just comes naturally.
That's just one thing you can try; there's also things like joining a club that he's in, or asking him about something from a class you're both in, or the old standby of "accidentally" dropping your books in front of him and seeing if he helps you pick them up (that last one is pretty desperate, though, so only do it as a last resort).
Good luck!
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who was the 1st one to sign the declaration of independence? (link)
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I think it was John Hancock. Here's an idea - why not use an internet search engine and find out?
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What's the difference between a hotel, a motel, and an inn? (link)
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Nowadays, the difference is mostly blurred. It's whatever the owner decides to call the place.
"Inn" is an older word, dating back to the middle ages. Because of that, it tends to evoke a certain nostalgia and an idea of personal, friendly service. Holiday Inn notwithstanding, an inn is usually a standalone business and not part of a chain. It's not used much anymore as a generally descriptive word (no one says "I made reservations at the inn").
A "Motel" is usually descriptive of a cheap place to park your car and spend the night. People usually don't do extended stays at a motel; they drive in at night and are on their way the next morning. It's a place to sleep, not a place to stay. It's a "motor hotel".
A "Hotel" is generally used to describe a place where one might stay multiple nights, and it generally has more amenities such as a bar, lounge, pool, restaurant, meeting rooms, ballrooms, and so on. It's also a generic term to mean anywhere that one can rent a bedroom on a daily basis.
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14/f
There's this guy in school that I like that I dont're really talk to that often. I want to ask him to the Sadie Hawkins dance, but I'm not sure how to, thinking it might be kind of awkward because we don't talk that often. What would be a good way to ask him...and is it appropriate that I ask him? thanks. (link)
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It's entirely appropriate to ask him. As for the nervousness, awkward feelings, etc... welcome to our world! Guys have been dealing with that for generations.
The best way to ask him is alone. You don't want peer pressure influencing his decision, and just in case he says "No" you probably don't want it to be a public event. "Alone" doesn't have to mean in a dark alley or something, just a time when neither of you are surrounded by a group of friends. If you have a class together, tell him just before the bell that you wanted to ask him something and would he mind sticking around for a moment?
As far as how to increase your chances of getting a "Yes", here are some pointers:
(1) Look pretty. Hey, guys will be guys, and they like to see pretty girls. So wear a flattering outfit that day and do your hair and makeup with a little extra care. Don't go overboard, though - that'll scare him away.
(2) Don't prepare a speech. That's insincere and will make him feel nervous (after all, HE didn't get a chance to prepare notes). Just ask him.
(3) Flattery isn't necessary. The mere fact that you're asking him is compliment enough.
(4) The straightforward approach is best. Something like, "The Sadie Hawkins dance is coming up, and I think it would be a lot of fun to go with you. What do you say?"
(NOTE: Notice that you say, "I'd like to go with you" and not "I'd like for us to go together." The difference is that the first one says that he's a great guy, and the second one says that the two of you would make a great couple. That will set off his Anti-Commitment alarms! He's more likely to respond positively to a personal compliment than to your ideas about the future. After he accepts, THEN you an talk about "we" and "us". It seems a small thing, but it makes a difference.)
If he accepts, then say, "Great! You want to get together sometime and make plans?" Boom, you just scored two dates for the price of one, and got the chance to see how well you'll hit it off before actually going to the dance.
If he declines, then try not to be too upset about it. It's possible, for instance, that he's already been asked by someone else and it would be wrong for him to break that date, or maybe his older brother is coming into town that night. Try to smile and say, "Oh, that's too bad... maybe some other time?" Then, make sure to talk to him more often in the future, and maybe there WILL be another time.
Good luck!
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i guess i can say im jelouse, of when my boyfreind is with this girl in his classes and inbetween classes alot, and occsaionaly sits with her at lunch, i mean i trust him by all means, but i hate bein jelouse cuz it hurts me and effects my mood. but i hate seein them laffing together and im pretty sure what i see is a form of flirting... what should i do i mean do i have a reason to be jelouse if there kinda flirting...? he reassures me its nothing like that but when he first met her he was al like shes mad cool, we have so much in common , and shes in a lotta classes with me, and we walk together to our classes. it hurts, sometimes i just feel like shes on his mind when i want to b the one on his mind, and knowign that hes with her in gym and what not = / idkk i need advice (link)
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I think your relationship is in trouble. It's time to have a talk with him about it.
Tell him that you see what's going on, and you can't help but feel that he's attracted to her in a way that affects your relationship. Ask him flat out - would he rather be dating her than you? If the answer is yes, then that's it; let him go (you could also choose to fight for him, but that's something that tends to work out a lot better in the movies than it does in reality). Try not to be too upset with him if he does say he wants to break up - at least he's being honest, and that's worth something.
If the answer is no, then the two of you are going to have to sort out some feelings. Guys will flirt - at least the more fun and interesting ones do - but you're not out of line to get upset about it when he focuses his attention on ONE girl who is not you. He needs to offer real reassurance that you ARE the first and foremost girl in his life right now, in actions and not words. Lunch, for instance - he certainly doesn't need to spend every lunch hour with you, but I don't think it's too much for you to ask that he not spend them with her (especially if they're sitting alone together).
Once you've "pinned him down" and gotten a yes or no answer, then hold him to it. He doesn't get to try going out with her and then expect to find you waiting if it doesn't work out. Likewise, he doesn't get to reassure you that everything is fine, only to end up kissing her in an empty hallway between classes. You ask him about how he feels about her in order to give him a chance to be honest about his feelings, and if he chooses to lie about them, then that's extremely disrespectful to you. At that point, you publicly expose him for the lying bastard he is. You might even want to tell his new girlfriend what really happened.
My gut instinct tells me, unfortunately, that he will choose to break up with you. That may be for the best in the long run. Good luck to you.
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Okay me and my boyfriend have been going out for 11 months, and we were talking about a dream i had and then he started to tell me about his dream but then he stopped. i had to force him to tell me because he kept saying no, but he shouldnt have to hide anything from me. anyways he told me his dream. it hurt me so bad, i didnt show it because he seemed pretty upset and bothered by it also and ashamed but it realy hurt me , his dream was ; he was in his room or a room idk , with two other girls. having sex with them and stuff them doing stuff to him and stuff .......WHY W0ULD HE DREAM ABOUT THAT .. I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THAT WAS IN HIS HEAD . he said he didnt know who the girls were, that they werent anyone, i want to belive him on that but i dont know . i dont know it hurt so bad to know that he was dreamin about fuckin two other girls. and i mean wht if this isnt the only time, i kno its just a dream but dreams mean something....does anyone know what this means?=/ (link)
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It means he's normal.
Really, you need to lighten up a bit. People are NOT responsible for the content of our dreams! They are uncontrolled manifestations of the subconscious, and for you to get upset with him over his dreams is about the most unreasonable thing I can imagine. How exactly would you like him to control his dreams?
For that matter, it is not your place to police his thoughts. If he's like most of the male population of the world, then he DOES occasionally fantasize about sex with multiple women, along with a lot of other wild scenarios that you might find appalling. As long as he doesn't try to turn that into a reality behind your back, he's doing NOTHING WRONG.
Furthermore, if you continue to go overboard in your reactions after asking him to be honest with you, it won't be long before he begins to tell you only what you want to hear. If you want to preserve the honesty in your relationship, then don't get on his case when he shows the courage to bare his innermost thoughts and feelings. He'll stop sharing them with you if you do.
You're right: he shouldn't have to hide anything from you. He should be able to talk freely with you without having to worry about whether you'll go ballistic over silly things like what he dreams at night. If you want him to be honest and forthcoming with you in the future, then you need to apologize to him for overreacting. I think, however, that no matter what you do this is the last time he'll feel comfortable sharing a dream with you for a long while.
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so i have to give this 10 min speech. and i have no clue what topic to do. so far ive thought of
school dress codes
off campus lunchs
abortion
how technology is changing life.
but i feel those topics wont be good enought to last me 10 mins.
it can be either a persuasive speech or a informative speech.
please help me.
its part of my final.
and its due of friday january 12th. (link)
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Well, if you've only got two days, you'd better pick something you're already familiar with. You don't have time to do exhaustive research.
I'd steer clear of abortion and other really hot-button issues. There's certainly a lot to talk about, but you run the risk of offending the instructor and that won't do your grade any good. A truly ethical teacher would grade objectively, but there's always the chance that his personal feelings may influence him without his realizing it.
Actually, when one is in a classroom situation, the topic doesn't usually matter nearly as much as your delivery. It is therefore best to pick something that you know you can speak confidently about.
Ten minutes is a lot shorter than it sounds; you could probably fill hours with any of the topics you mention above (except for off-campus lunches; I'd give that one a pass). Of the ones on your list, I think the last might be the most interesting, but it needs to be narrowed down a bit - speak about how just ONE particular technology is changing lives, such as the cell phone or the internet. And make sure you have real facts and numbers to back you up; don't just talk about your impressions. Part of your grade will undoubtably be about how thoroughly you did your research and how well you can support your statements. Among the notes you take to the podium should be your list of sources for your data - offer to turn this in, it may get you extra credit.
Finally, try to find the time to practice the speech before Friday. You don't have much time left, but it will really hurt you if you're giving it for the first time in front of the class.
Good luck!
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I had sex with this guy.
He asked the next day "is it everything cool between us?"
What does it mean?
(link)
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Some people freak out after having sex, and he is worried that you might, apparently. He's concerned that perhaps you may regret it or something. Mostly, he wants to make sure that you won't "blame" him for having sex with you; these days, teenage guys are practically trained to think that girls don't actually want sex.
All he's looking for is reassurance from you that you enjoyed it, and he's inviting discussion on how your relationship has changed. In other words, it's a guy's way of saying "We need to talk."
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Do guys think pantie line showing is sexy or not? (link)
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Generally not. Of course, everything is a turn-on for someone, but I've never heard my fellow guys talk about how hot panty lines are.
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Some-One Please Help meand tell me how to pash my boyfriend wants to pash me and i have never pashed and im scared i dont know how to plz some -one just tell me what to do ?? (link)
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Maybe I'm just ignorant, but could you ask that question again and clarify what "pash" means?
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Hello-sorry this may be long--will rate though
Well to start off I'm 15/f and sadly never had a boyfriend (that was real and truly "love") or a real relationship. And recently at school (I'm a freshmen so I'm meeting all these new people) but it almost seems like when I met a new guy I get a lil crush but then within a week or so I'm over it. Well, err I want to say Wednesday of last week my friend came over and we called some boys. (We called two boys one being my friend and the toher being her friend who's also friends with mine) So anyways all of us talked for awhile. And I was like hm my friends friend (the guy who well call Bob) seemed pretty cool. SO we went to the movies together him, my friend, and 2 other people, and me. I sat next to him we kinda talked thoughout the movie..he bought me a drink..and that night i was like slap happy. I had a really good night with him and the rest of my friends. So the next day which would now be Saturday my friend came over again and we called them and we talked. Then later that day he called me back on MY phone (usually he calls my friends phone) and him and I talked for ohh about and hour or so which i reallly liked. And then later that day I met him, "bob", at a school (which i had my father drive me too and pick me up from lol) and him and 2 of his friends and i hung out. And then from then on we've just talked like once on facebook. But see I don't know wether I like him for real or weather its just me being stupid wanting a boyfriend so ticking myself into liking him. And I want to call him but I read in CG! you should wait for him to call you...and ahh! I don't know what to do. Him, my friend, and another boy are hopeuflly hanging out this weekend. But idk what to do or how to tell if I like him for real or if i'm being stupid and faking myself into liking him cause hes just reall sweet. So if you could please just give me a little advise or something??
Thanks for reading and caring about my stupid boy problems =P (link)
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Take a deep breath, and don't stress.
First of all, you had a good time with this guy and he was fun to be with. So what if it's not True Love? As long as you're honest about your feelings, there's no reason why you can't go out with a guy that you're not head-over-heels about.
Don't pay attention to anything the magazines say about relationships. I guarantee that not one author of any of those articles has ever met you or Bob. How do they know what's going to work for you? Call him if you want to. Not only would you be returning the favor (he called you first, after all) but it's a nice ego stroke for a guy when a girl calls him. Just tell him that you hope to see him this weekend.
A relationship doesn't have to be deep and intense for it to be worthwhile. It sounds to me like Bob would make a great First Boyfriend - he seems nice, he seems interested, you have mutual friends and you don't have your whole heart invested so it's less likely to break.
Besides, who knows what the future holds? Sometimes love happens over time.
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A mean , rude, jerk.
He's mean to me, he calls me fat etc.
He hates me
But we used to be really really good friends
I still like him
No matter how mean he is
wtf
help?
14/f (link)
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With all due respect, for you to say, "I still like him, no matter how mean he is" is the equivalent of saying, "I am a doormat - treat me like dog crap and I'll shrug and smile."
It's unfortunate that this person who used to be your friend has become so callous and crude over time, but that's what happens to people sometimes. You have to give him the cold shoulder. If you care about what he thinks or says, then you may start believing it of yourself, and that won't do you any good.
He is no longer your friend. You will need to accept that and move on. You might consider telling him what a piece of garbage he's grown into, but truthfully he's unlikely to care, so I'd advise you not to waste your time with it.
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please dont answer 'do you homeowkr yourself' or saomething like that, be cause im not looking for the answer i alreadsy know all about it im just trying to understand the question. I have to write a 5 paragraph essya and the question says
'What is the original intent and structure of the central government'
-use the declaration of independance and the articles of confderation as main topics.
I dont really get what thats asking? what would i write about.
thankss. (link)
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It seems to me that what the question is asking is this:
"When the original founders of the nation gathered to define the new government, what were they hoping to achieve and how did they design the government in order to do that?"
I'm going to assume that you're talking about the United States, because you mention the Declaration of Independence (perhaps other countries have similarly titled documents - if so, I'm simply not aware of it). Therefore, you will want to discuss things like:
In what ways was their new government different from what was traditional at the time, that is, a monarchy with a ruling house and a parliament?
What were their primary goals that they hoped to achieve with this new system of government? How did they feel it could be superior to the old ways?
What were some of the methods they built into the system to achieve these goals?
Were there some ways in which the new system was INFERIOR to the old?
What examples already existed for them to follow, and what old ideas did they adopt and re-work for their purposes?
You don't necessarily need to answer all the above questions in your essay, and you may consider others that I haven't thought of, but hopefully I've given you a place to start your thinking.
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I am 17 and I met this guy at a bar. He is 21 and I just wonder if other people think that is too old for me. Should I go out with him again? We exchanged phone numbers and we have talked on the phone. Any and all responses are appreciated. (link)
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No, he's not too old for you as far as the relationship being weird or illegal. However, have you considered that since you met in a bar, he might be under the impression that you're 21? You do owe it to him to reveal your true age if you intend to date.
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13/f last night i think i interuppted my parents having sex. my mom yelled at me through the door because it was locked and i knocked on it. it was like 10:45 pm. my parents never go to bed that early and they never shut the door and lock it. is this a sighn of ur parents having sex?? im just curious and i didnt think my parents still did that stuff. should i ask my mom or should i just let it go?? its really bugging me!!! (link)
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Odds are, that's exactly what they were up to, and it's a good and positive thing. That's what healthy, happily married couples DO, and many people keep it up well into their 70s or longer.
However, just because it's healthy and normal doesn't mean it's any of your business. Sex is something private between two adults, even if they're your parents. It's natural that you're a little curious, but you're just going to have to live with it and keep your questions to yourself. What they do behind the locked door of their bedroom is not your concern. It is a sign of maturity to show a little decorum and not ask every question that pops into your head.
This is not to say that you can't ask your parents about sex in general. You should be able to ask them about whatever you feel you need to, and they in turn have a duty and responsibility to give you clear, straightforward, honest answers.
And in the future, if you notice that their door is locked late at night... knock on it only if the kitchen is on fire.
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