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Kristina is the name i'm a self taught artist iv'e been a featured advice columnist 9 time’s

advice

17/f

Sometimes It feels like I'm the only one trying in my relationship with my boyfriend. He lacks in calling me & texting me & he often forgets about everything. He says he cares about me , that he wants to make sure I'm happy but instead of being happy I'm upset almost every day & I getting sick of bitting my tounge and prettending like everythings fine when in reality it isn't. He's in college & I understand college is diffrent from highschool but it feels like I'm his sidechick . I know he loves me and I'm certain he's not cheating on me he's just really busy. I've had these conversations with him & have often tried telling him how I feel. But sometimes he makes me feel like he seriously does not care..I just don't know what to do anymore I really don't want to look at leaving him as an option I care a lot for him and I really want to see us work out..how can I express myself more to him in a way that will get him to listen?

I would believe what he says to you he wouldn't of said it if it wasn't true i don't think he'd lie to you i'd sit him down and tell him exactly how you feel it's better then not saying anything
and keeping everything your feeling to yourself he'll probably understand that's your best option
seeing as you don't want to leave him if for some reason things don't work out you still know that you tried trying is better then not doing anything
at all and regretting it later since your in a relationship with him you should be able to tell one another anything and be able to trust him it's worth a shot to try and talk to him again you maybe surprised at how things turned out unlike the other times you tried

Good luck!

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Hi, sooo. I've been feeling really down lately. Very, very down.

Background story --
i went to three different high schools, and never really kept in touch with people, and graduated with zero friends. i went to a new high school my senior year, and for lunch everyday I either went to the library by myself, or hid in the bathroom. I don't know what's wrong with me but I just like to be by myself. I'm introverted. Quiet, observant, and socially awkward. I participated in some after school activities like drama club so some people know me from that because I used to talk there, but in general I graduated with zero friends, and not even a lot of acquaintances. I guess you could say I was a loner for two years.
Now, I'm in my freshman year of college. I can't even join facebook because, well face it, you need close friends to join so it doesn't look like you're a loner...and I wouldn't want to join facebook anyways, but that's not the problem.

I decided to go to college on the other side of the country (from cali to new york city). The city is great and everything, but I still feel alone. It doesn't help that the college is in New York City because everyone goes home on the weekends, or out of the campus and no one seems to have come as far as I have. It is a tiny college, like an apartment in the city with an attached building to attend classes. It's not a college campus or a typical college experience at all. And I hate it. Most people seem to know/have at most like 4 friends. It has no sense of community at all, so I feel like I'm alive but not living. I feel 100% invisible. It makes me feel like crying a lot because I'm alone and because the only people I talk to are my parents on the phone. I thought college would be a change from my two horrible high school years but it's just the same, if not worse because now I'm alone and away from home.

And I don't mean to be obnoxious or anything, but I am quite attractive, and get attention from guys everywhere. Because I barely have friends, I like the attention because it makes me feel loved, but at the end of the day I realize it is just because of the way I look. I miss how I used to have friends who loved me for me and not because of how beautiful I am or whatever. I used to be not so attractive looking, and quite odd looking until my 18th birthday. Then, I suddenly changed lookswise and suddenly everyone now wants to get to know me but after they discover I'm not that exciting and loud, they don't go further, and I miss having friends who liked me for my personality and not my looks, back in like early high school. I also feel like I'm a little standoffish in my behavior, I don't talk to people a lot. I'm not outgoing, but I'm not shy. I'm just.....there. People in college like me as acquaintances. But again, lots of them like me because I'm pretty. There has to be more to me than just my looks, and I'd really whatever part of me that is to be appreciated instead of superficial things.

Sometimes, I roam the streets of New York alone just because I enjoy getting hit on by strangers, men of all ages, sometimes I'll go to bookstores hoping I can chat up with some cute guys. I get discounts at places because I'm 'pretty', and I've even had a lot of creepy teachers. Don't get me wrong though, I mean I don't do anything with guys, I don't even have a bf. It sucks because most people assume I have one or are intimidated so they don't ask me out. And good looks in my experience attracts the guys who are superficial or just want to hook up. I'm just a flirt/tease. Male attention sort of temporarily distracts me from the fact that in reality I'm all alone. I like the attention because I don't get any other kind. I've gotten addicted to just going out and doing things alone, like shopping...eating...and everywhere I go because like I said, I get attention. My roommate is boring and similar to me and doesn't have many friends here but she has her friends from high school. And maybe I should talk more in general, but I never have exciting stories to tell and I feel like I wish I was more exciting and articulate as well. I wish I could enjoy and want to make friends but this part of me just oddly likes being alone. It's so weird. I guess because it's very 'safe' to be alone - you don't have to put yourself out there. You don't have to be judged. So it's like, I want friends but I don't want friends. Crazy weird, huh? And I've also gotten disinterested in my academics. Like, I maintain a decent gpa, but it could be way better if my mind wasn't so....distracted by my dreams of becoming an actress and by my depression. Academically, I don't feel the motivation to do my best even though I do good, because I want to be an actress and I'm so driven by it it's really all I want to do and all I think about.

I also have this obsession with fame, and I'm an aspiring actress which is partially why I came to the new york city for college. I guess my obsession for fame stems from the fact that I feel like proving people wrong and I've never felt loved and fame is basically being loved to the extreme (unless your famous for something bad but not the kind of fame I want and that I'm referring to). So sometimes I like being alone and focusing on my career. I study movies, I act, and things are looking up in that direction.

But, at the end of the day. I cry. I'd like someone who genuinely loves me and cares about me because of my personality. Getting attention from guys doesn't count anymore, it's superficial as hell. I would really like best friends and perhaps a boyfriend, but I only attract guys who want me for hooking up. And I never do give in, but like I said, I thrive on the attention and I do flirt back.


So, after all is said. Any advice?

Just because you didn't keep in touch with your other friends doesn't mean you can't make new one's they are in your past try and talk to people
at the college give them a chance the only person that can change your life is you your in control if you don't like being alone then change it and make it better be confident believe in yourself confidence is key and it goes a long way don't let your nerves get the best of you everyone gets nervous it's normal if people only like you because of your looks then forget them and move on you don't need people like that in your life :)

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14/m

So I like this girl and we talk a lot on facebook and she said she kinda likes me. She said she noticed I was shy and I admit I am because I don’t really talk to anyone new epically girls in particular. My reason for not talking to girls usually is because I don’t know what to say. So I guess im asking is there a way I can get un-shy?

Yes there's a way you can not become shy and it's confidence be confident believe in yourself that you can talk to the girl plan what you want to say before you do actually speak that way once you
do it will be easier calm yourself down take deep breaths relax don't let your nerves get the best of you everyone gets nervous sometimes it's normal just be confident and believe in yourself and you'll do fine :)

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Well i got myself an a class loser who has wrecked my car stoled money from me lived off my disability check broke my finger threatens to burn my house down shoot me destroy my property hurt my family and what few friends i have left he has been in prison for most of his life and of course he was never guilty ha ha. the police wont help until he hurts me, my house and belongings are up for grabs unless they catch him in the act of destroying them, believe me i have known him for 9 yrs and he just dont give a damn, oh yea im in a wheelchair so running is kinda out of the picture. by the way i have 2 teens at home that adore the hell out of him, they have no clue. so let me hear something good guys please.

First tell your family what's happening also tell the two teens that he isn't the type of person that they should be adoring try and avoid him as much as you can the less your near him the better make sure your family doesn't go outside as much and if they do make sure it isn't far since you don't want to risk them getting hurt and making things worst then they already are tell the police
that you'd like them to protect you almost as if you are in protective custody say that without them protecting you he has a better chance of hurting you :)

Good luck!

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seriously it's not fair how everyone my age is skinny and has perfict boddies and then theres me size 5 in pants and i am like five five or five six for my height and i am like xs/s in tops/shirts I just don't understand why i can't have the same bodie type as everyone eles:(????

You won't have the same body type as everyone elese considering your body is different then others everyone has things they'd like to change
about themselves or that they don't like it's normal to feel that way but you should accept who you are like your body it's most likely still growing and changing :)

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19/f Lately I feel like a total and utter loser. I'm nineteen years old, no license, no job, no car, and I'm not in college. I graduated over six months ago, and still have nothing. I feel like no one really cares. My grandparents keep telling me I need to join the military, and my parents keep reassuring me everything will be fine. I'm starting to think they don't know anything about me. All I do is sit around my house, reed books, see my boyfriend, watch movies, and play on the computer. I'm in over my head worried about health insurance, a place to live, etc. I've been trying to get my license but every time I take it I get nervous and I've already taken it 3 time. I know. Pathetic, right? My boyfriend has been driving with me, but my parents haven't been at all. I feel like I'm at his mercy and that I'm using him, and I don't like feeling that way. I always tell him I appreciate everything he does for me. I just wish I could SHOW him how much I appreciate him. But I don't have anything. What do I do? I don't want to live with my parents forever, what do I do? I hope to get my license but I always get so nervous. How can I make that so it's less? Please help!

If it makes you feel any better i'm the same age as you age and i graduated last year i don't have a license,car,or job also not in college either so your not alone i failed my permit test 4 times i wouldn't give up on trying to get your license you've got to be confident and believe in yourself think positively thinking negatively only makes the situation worst ask your parents to drive with you and say that you'd like to give
your boyfriend a break all the driving your doing is going to benefit you remember that when your behind the wheel you can do anything if you put your mind to it practice makes perfect if you don't succeed then try again words of encouragement :)

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My friend told me that she started eating corn at every meal and it is making her breasts grow! Her breasts are getting bigger but I don't know if it is the corn or just her body still growing.

These little ones are killing me so can anyone tell me for sure does corn make your breasts grow?

Thank you!

I don't think corn will make them grow bigger it's probably her body still growing here are some things that will make them grow breast augmentation surgery,pregnancy,weight gain and sometimes birth control pills :)

Hope this helped!

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I have to go into the hospital and they are going to put an IV in my arm. How bad does this hurt?

Has anyone had an IV before?

Yes it's going to hurt iv'e had a IV put in seeing as i had surgery done in the past it's uncomfortable for a few seconds close your eyes and don't look if you aren't comfortable with needles everyone handles pain differently you may feel it hurts and others may not it will be over before you know it try and stay calm while they put it in you can always hold someone's hand if you get scared :)

Good luck!

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Someone told me that if I gave head and swallowed cum I could get throat cancer! Isd this really true? Please! Could someone with some real knowledge and experience and NO throat cancer answer me? I guess if you have it then you should tell me too. I am SO worried! :(

No swallowing cum can't cause you to get throat cancer you can get throat cancer from
smoking ciagrettes and drinking large amounts of alcohol so you have nothing to worry about :) The person who told you should get their facts straight before telling you lies and making you think it was true when clearly it isn't

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i have really bad breath, people can smell it for like 2 metres. what is wrong with me? i eat healthy, try to floss, use mouth wash and clean my teeth but it doesnt work! What could be causing this and how do i stop it? :(

Some foods that you eat can cause you to have bad breath also some drinks too try using breath mints
or chew gum if you aren't at home and you can't brush your teeth try brushing your teeth after you eat something and brush your tounge too continue to use mouth wash and rinse your mouth out many times if it's making you feel uncomfortable then talk to your parents i'm sure they'll be happy to give you advice and help you

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for the most part, i'm thin. and i have long legs. i know i'm fortunate to have that, but once you hear this, you won't think the same. i have not developed breasts yet whatsoever (literally, i'm not exaggerating) and i'm 15, yes FIFTEEN years old. i've started puberty otherwise. for example, my upper thighs are really chubby and my hips are really wide. and then my chest is just.. not a chest? as in it looks like a ten year old boy's? it's repulsive. i'm developing normally otherwise, have a normal weight, etc.
what is wrong with me?!?!?!
i'm thinking of getting surgery when i'm older because i've been waiting to get them for six years now (most of my friends developed as early as age 9.)
do i want to run out and have sex? no.
but do i want to be able to be like every single other girl i've met and be able to look good in a bathing suit and not hate my body? yes. :(

Everyone has something they don't like about themselves and they would like to change it's normal to feel that way but some parts of your body still need time to grow as far as your breasts are concerned they will grow and will stop growing at some point you've got to remember your young so some parts of your body haven't fully grown or developed yet you will be able to feel confident in a bathing suit you've just got to be patient and let your body grow at some point you will no longer hate your body :)

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I know that sounds stupid but I mean if you do things to poop more like take laxatives and eat lots of fiber then does pooping make you lose weight?

How much weight can you lose if you keep making yourself go? Will it do anything bad to yuo if you take laxatives every day?

I don't think pooping will make you loose weight
but eating fiber will make you go to the bathroom
you should only take laxatives if you truely aren't able to go not going will make you constipated not to mention feel bloated laxatives
make you loose water weight not actual weight laxatives are mainly used to treat constipation :)

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Hi! Can anyone tell me how to get a decent advice column? Like the backround nd stuff. I rate :)

Well if you click on column settings you can choose from backrounds that have already been made
also choose what colors you'd like using the color chart in order to make your own background
you must have a paid account also you can put what
picture you'd like by going to profile settings and clicking browse and uploading a picture that's on your computer :)


Hope that helped!

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okay im 15f and a boy confessed to me , im starting to like him too and i told him that. The thing is when we r around eachother i barely talk to him. Its bc i get shy around boys that like me. ive never had a boyfriend so its kind of weird. I've had boys that liked me before, dont get me wrong, but im not going to go out with any guys that like me. thats called being desperate. well anyways it would be different if he didnt like me. i wouldnt have any problemin talking to him then. i need someone to help me figure out a way to get over this shyness. its a little too much.

Confidence is key if your confident you won't be shy believe in yourself say to yourself i can do this here's a tip practice what you want to say many times to yourself that way once you do speak to a boy you won't be nervous and shy being shy isn't something to be ashamed of everyone gets nervous at some point don't let your nerves get the best of you breathe take a few deep breaths and calm yourself down then once you feel ready go for it there's no rush :)

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18/f
Freshman college student.

I hang out with 3 other girls who live down the hall from me. One of the girls has liked a sophomore guy(Drew) since the beginning of school. He helped her move in to her dorm. I always knew who he was but we never talked more than a few words in a group conversation. Well Friday night 2 of the 3 girls and some guys including Drew were hanging out. We started drinking and my friends left because they're uncomfortable with it so I stayed back with the guys. I had never really hung out with any of them much before but I wasn't ready to go to bed. We ended up hanging out until 5 in the morning.
Saturday night. The same thing happens, all the girls and the same guys are hanging out. The guys were drunk, I didn't have any but the girls were uncomfortable again and left around 11. Me and Drew had started up our own conversation, isolating ourselves from the group and didn't even notice the girls leave. At around 1:30am the guys went to bed, leaving me and Drew on the floor of the common room talking. We talked until 6:30am! About everything, relationships, jobs, family, sex, school, our major (everyone I've mentioned are all in the same major). At 6:30 people started waking up and came out and saw us still sitting on the floor so we decided it was best if we went to bed. He asked for my number, walked me to my door and then he left.
Sunday, we were all working late hours on projects in the studio and I was most likely going to pull an all nighter. Drew, who usually would visit my friend at her desk was now visiting me more frequently and my friend definitely noticed. She had stopped talking to me, gave Drew an attitude, and gave us both dirty looks. He didn't want to talk to someone who gave him an attitude for no reason so he just continued to stay at my desk and ignore my friend. I have yet to flirt with him! And he always comes to me but my friend is still mad. She has a very bubbly personality and doesn't know how to flirt, so I'm sure he's clueless that she likes him. I have been myself the whole time and he hasn't stopped talking to me since that night when we stayed up. Well my friend left the studio at 4 in the morning without a goodbye. We were supposed to walk back together so we didn't have to walk in the dark alone but instead she just left without me. So I stayed and finished my project until 6 when Drew and I decided to call it quits. He walked me to my room again and then left to go to his dorm.
Today we were texting and his response to something I said was "You are sooo awesome, how have we never talked before?"

I don't know what to do. The only reason I haven't flirted with him is because of my friend's feelings towards him but he doesn't have feelings for her at all and her bitchy behavior lowered the chances of that ever happening. She's turning the group against me for 'stealing her man' even though she never told him she liked him and I never flirted. If he likes me, I'm sorry but thats not my fault so I don't deserve an attitude. I thought college was about growing up and getting away from childish behavior and drama.

What do I do? I see them both everyday.

Go for it flirt with him he doesn't like your friend he likes you it's her own fault for having
a attitude and acting the way she is confront your
friend and say she needs to stop acting childlish
and that she ruined her chances of ever being with him also say that he isn't her man since they aren't even dating she needs to stop turning the group aganist you he obviously likes you so go ahead and flirt take this chance because if you don't you'll most likely end up regretting it later loosing one friend isn't going to make a difference you can always make new ones i'd ignore her and just focus on Drew :)

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Ok i think i have an idea of what you guys will say but is there a way to tell that your ready to date?

I don't want to waste a girl's time if im not ready im 14/m and in 8th grade

Your age is just a number nothing more if you feel confident enough and think your ready to date then you should do so don't let anything hold you back i say go for it it's worth a shot there's no harm in trying if for some reason things don't work out you'll still know you tried trying is better then not doing anything and you regretting it later on :)

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16 f.
i have a best friend, who ive been close with for about 3 years now. i love her too death and we have been soo close for soo long, but latley shes become extrememly conceited. shes always thought she was very good looking, and that never really bothered me that much. but now she has full out turned into a snobby girl. she thinks shes better then everyone else, and shes not the same person i was best friends with. i know her soo well, but she has changed! im a really laid back girl and i dont really get into drama just because i dont like it. so im not going to call her out and make a big deal over it, but i dont really know what to do about it,
should i stop being friends with her? or should i talk to her about it?
idk...what would you do in my situation?

thanks in advance!

If i were in your situation i'd talk to her tell her exactly how you feel i wouldn't abandon her seeing as you and her are close and that would most likely ruin your friendship talking goes a long way it's better then keeping everything your
feeling inside and not saying anything at all tell her you aren't liking the way she's been acting lately but do it nicely so she doesn't think your being mean :)

Hope this helped!

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Well he is actually my ex boyfriend. I wasn't aware that I was immature. But he says that I behave like I am 10 years old sometimes (not always). That's not why he left me. He just sees me as a friend now. I am 16 years old and have never been called immature :(. Any ideas?

I wouldn't listen to him as long as you know your not immature then i think you'll be fine if it makes you feel any better i get called immature too expect by my mother which i think is worst :)

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we went out for a long time. We were inlove, at least I was. He is trying to come back. Its been a year. He doesn't text me that much....he said that he wants to talk to me. Talk to me about? I don't know. He sounded serious so i don't know what to think. the reason why we broke up a year ago is because i found out he was talking to someone. He says he was just playing around with her. We used to hate each other. He would tell my friends how much he hated me. I would tell my friends how much i hated him. I just could never say that to his friends because i felt bad about it. Plus deep down i knew it wasn't true. I was just mad at him for what had happend. I just want if its posibble that a first love can be the one. I have been with many other guys..like dated, but i still like him. What do you guys think? is he just playing with me now, should i give him another chance? should i just forget about It?

I wouldn't forget about it i'd give him another chance everyone deserves chances even him i also wouldn't jump to conclusions he could be serious you never know until you talk to him i'd hear him out and see what he has to say give him the benefit of the doubt it's hard to say whether or
not he's playing you you'll have to find that out
for yourself it's up to the person to decide if their first love is really the one :)

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okay so l recently split with my on and off boyfriend for over a year. he's my first love and so he's the only one l've ever had sex with. when he had an erection though, his penis would bend to the side, not a whole lot but it was a noticable amount. l have my period now and l've been realizing that when l put the tampon in, it hurts until its almost all the way in and i feel it like sort of pop in not straight but kind of crooked. is it possible that by having sex with him could have bent me inside? lf so, then could it be fixed by sex with another man who's not bent. lf someone could help me out l'd really appreciate it. thanks

I don't think your bent down there tampons are suppose to hurt when you put them in make sure your putting it in correctly if what's happening is making you feel uncomfortable then you should go visit a doctor also don't think that having sex with another boy will solve the problem it could possiblity make things worst i'd go visit a doctor and see what they have to say and explain to them what exactly happened

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