Wife, mother, loyal friend to the end, model, classic car collector. almost 30 years old, and seen alot in my few years here on earth. People usually come to me for advice, and i give in return grounded, realistic answers.
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Member Since: January 18, 2005
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adviceman49
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20/f
So I'm starting to develop a crush on one of my co workers.
I'm not sure how to go about it. We talk on facebook almost every day, he usually initiates it which I think is a good sign.
I don't hang out with him outside of work. I did invite him to my party tomorrow and he said he'll probably be able to come.
We're pretty cool, we talk normal, tease each other at work and online.
My friends/coworkers all say he likes me. I haven't said anything about me liking him. They said because he messages me often and he doesn't message them.
He hasn't given any hints if he likes me or not. Usually a guy will start calling me pretty and talk about hanging out and all that if they're interested in me. He hasn't done anything like that. I'll tell him about the dates I've had in the past and he'll bring it up later and ask how they went.
The only thing I've tried is asking if he had a girlfriend, and he said no. He asked what is considered a date and then he said he hung out with a girl but it wasn't a date. I asked if he liked her and he said no. I asked if he liked anyone and he said his mom...so he avoided the subject and I let it go.
I don't want to straight up tell him I like him. Mostly because if he doesn't like me, it'll be weird when I work with him.
So is there any other ideas? (link)
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Heres the thing, not all guys are the same as the ones youve experienced in the past. their not ALL gonna come on to you as strongly, so theres going to be times where youll have to put yourself out there a little.
If he talks to YOU first everyday then hes clearly interested in something about you.
If he asks you how dates went that you went on afterwards then hes probably feeling you out to see if your still single and up for grabs.
if he hasnt invited you to anything but you just now invited him to your party then you pretty much just did it FIRST! ; )
and depending on HOW he said back to you that he liked his MOM, then that depending on the WAY he said it back that might have been his way of saying that there are not other girls in his life (other then you) that he likes right now. see? he sounds like hes playing it safe and is acting logical so try not to read into things too much.
me might have also been trying to make a joke with the mom liking thing. just try to think about HOW he said it. If your sure hes not gay and just trying to be girlfriends with you, then he might actually really like you. He just might not be sure yet how to go about it either.
See im a different person, i dont have a problem letting someone know they look good and i do it in a joking kind of way (but i ALSO do that with many other things in my life) so maybe if you try putting your feelings out there more and making jokes and keeping things light then it might get him comfortable enough with you to let some feelings out.
; ) good luck
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I'm 24 year-old married woman with Asian-European ethnicity. My left eye has a small portion of an orange-reddish ring due to an accident. I'm planning to undergo a LASIK eye surgery next three months so my eyes will completely turn into blue and so the tiny ring will dissapear. However, I and my husband are planning to have a baby next year, which I will already have a completely blue eyes. (sorry for my statements are vague). My husband has a greyish-blue eyes while I have a
very dark brown eyes originally. So my question is, if I would get pregnant after I would have a Lasik surgery and completely turn my eyes into blue, would my baby have a blue eyes? I know genetically that brown eyes are dominant over blue but we would have same eye colour soon. I'm confused whether my baby would have a blue eyes or brown eyes. (link)
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yup, cant change your DNA. Whatever you were born with is what youll have.
thats basically asking "if i bleach my hair blonde and its actually dark brown, will my baby have blonde hair" does that make sense??
thats merely a cosmetic change to your appearance not a change of your genes.
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I'm tired of loving. Simple as that. I wish I was dead.. All I ever do is cause problems... I just want my life to be over. I don't want to take my own life though. I wish for someone to do it for me... Can someone help me? Please... Living is pointless for me. I can't escape the pain.... And now.... I'm completely... Irrevocably numb. (link)
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sorry but no one here is going to help you or give you ideas on how to end your life, thats not what we're about.
this is a place of healing and renewal for people who want to change their lives for the better.
if your interested in that then please ask as many questions as you want that arent related to ending your life.
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My best friend of 11 years decided to start dating each other 2 years ago. I love him so much it hurts. Well he's left me two other times to start dating someone else and then comes back. I think he's doing it again.. I can feel the distance and he's finding ways to blame everything on me and get mad at me for everything I do or don't do. This is exactly how he started acting last time he left me, he makes me feel like it's my fault and idk why.. Why can't he just be man enough and say that he found someone else? We've been best friends since we were kids.. don't I deserve that much? I don't get why guys do this.. I know it's not just him my past boyfriend did the exact same thing to me.. He doesn't break up with me he keeps it open but just starts acting different so I'll get mad and break it off so he doesn't look like the bad guy so when he's done with her he can come back and be able to say it was my fault we broke up... I don't get how he could hurt me this bad.. He promised he would never make me feel this way again but here i am... I'm lost for words.. I feel numb but really sad all at the same time (link)
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Hunny, this isnt what men do, this is what grown little BOYS do first off.
Secondly, you need to pull yourself up by your boots straps and NOT allow him to come back again. Now he thinks he can walk all over you because you let him back so many times!
He obviously cant stay committed so why would you want to keep putting your heart on the line? and who cares if it looks like you broke it off, hes no good anyway, look how he makes you feel by the things he says and does....
Let him know that he can go date other people but that you wont be there hanging around for whenever THAT doesnt work out this time period.
What hes doing is called deflecting ok, this is what people do to make themselves feel better about treating you like dirt. They nit pick at every little thing you do to start a fight so that your reaction will feed the flames and he'll have a logical reason to be mad at you. ((even though thats not logical at all))
so dont feed into his BS, ive had this happen before with guys and ive mastered how to fix it. At the end of the day it wont matter because youll ALWAYS do something wrong to be the bad guy in their mind because they need to make themselves feel better about hurting you because they KNOW their doing wrong. Secondly, you can ALSO try this: kill him with kindness, whatever he says or does DO NOT REACT, stay totally calm, show a blank poker face and just stare. say nothing when he does or say stupid bs. This will force a response from him because your refusing to react and he wont understand why. the less you say and do back the better.
then look away and say something simple like "thats fine" and continue to say nothing. Then if he tries to change the topic and make himself look like the victim by talking about something thats on a lighter note (say about a friend thats having a party over the weekend or something) just say ok. keep your answers short after he does something incredibly stupid or mean or nit picky so that no matter WHAT HE will ALWAYS look like the bad guy. see? and your just trying to please him but hes not being reasonable.
This is a cycle when people do this kinda stuff. and hes really feeling the need to hate you right now because he knows hes doing something awful behind your back. He knows its wrong and is in denial. dont give him a reason to hate you, stay cool, calm, and collected.
Then once hes being nice again break it off. Hes not worth all the heart ache hes caused you no matter how long youve known each other. youll find someone new if you just put yourself out there.
good luck.
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hi hope you can help me i'm a 15 year old male i'm a devout christian i love god with all my heart and i wanna be a better christian and devote my life to god i want to help people to get closer to god i wantto start to spread god's word i'm a bit nervous not sure where to start but i want to start talkinhg to people about god maybe start with people that i know not sure how do i go about it? (link)
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Well im not a real religious person so im probably not the right person here to answer this but ill tell you a few things that may help you along the way.
If you are apart of a church currently, you could take part in or start a TEEN or preteen program at your church where kids of the same age group can come once a week and talk about whats going on in their lives and you can preach to them about it.
((if you dont have one already that is))
The thing about talking to people about religion is you cant push it on them, you have to get them to want to take part in it or else your just being annoying and no one will want to take part.
your best bet is to maybe talk to victims of abuse or domestic violence groups when ever they have their meetings in order to get them interested you need to get them to feel like they can relate to the material.
like "even though you went through so much suffering, you must still be here for a reason because it was gods will and there is light at the end of the tunnel if your still here walking this earth and breathing"
things like that will get people of abuse or who have suffered alot to hear you out. then you can work that into your speech. ; )
good luck
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i'm a 18 year old guy and i have a very small penis
i'm really embarrassed i have been with my girlfriend for over 6 months and i'm worried about getting sexual with her my first girlfriend laughed at me when she saw my penis and she left me i'm worried that i may get laughed at again what do you think am i worrying to much will she still want to be with me is it a big deal if a guy has a small penis? (link)
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Well the average penis is about 5 to 7 inches NOT erect. so if your smaller than that, then you can worry alittle more.
What you can do is try having sex with her for the first time while "playing" under the covers in bed. she doesnt need to see your penis to know you have one and just tell her your already turned on by her so theres so need to touch it.
Also try turning to lights off, then if you feel like your still not big enough then use lots of lube over the condom, and thrust deeper and try different positions if she likes. Sometimes girls get off in one position more then the other.
Also, im sure that at this point if its been this long and you still havent had sex with her then shes probably interested in you for "the long run" aka you might be marriage material in her eyes or else why would she still stick around?
She may really like you for YOU and not really care about your penis size and is probably thinking that it'll all work itself out in that area. ; )
but if your afraid then show her what you can do with your penis first in the dark or BEFORE she sees it. its not necessarily size that matters, its also girth (thickness) and how you use it. She may find herself really surprised that its not as big as she'd thought or hoped, but you use it well. a penis thats too big can actually be painful for a woman, so the realistic size is one that will fit perfectly inside her aka 5 to 7 inches long.
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Well i cave my bf a blow job and i didnt wash my hands like a dumb person and went home and masterbated can i get pregnant from it? Do i have a low or high chance of pregnancy (link)
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no, most likely not. semen cannot servive outside the body for very long because of the drop in temp. outside of the body.
And gross, please wash your hands. lol ; )
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Am from nigeria, Am a virgin I got disvirgin last two weeks and I had sex today buh I felt pain and saw blood pls am confused am I still a virgin or what (link)
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if you saw blood after having vaginal sex then your not a virgin anymore. The blood was most likely from not having enough moisture inside you and you might have torn a little bit. take it easy on yourself a little and use lubricant the next time you have sex because it could make sex really painful if you dont.
always wear protection.
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Im looking for suggestions on what to call someone special. I have my birth mother, we have always had a rocky relationship. I have another mother figure in my life whom I adore. I'm very close with her. I need a special name for her as I don't feel calling her by her first name is appropriate, but calling her mom doesn't do it for me. She is like a mom. But more special than that. Any suggestions on a special name to call her? (link)
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God mother is another special name that you could call her actually because the def. of a god mother IS to be your mother incase your real mom cant!
so shes technically your god mother. or as my godmother called herself my "fairy godmother" ; )
it wouldnt be wrong to still call her by her first name and on paperwork you could legally write her in as your godmother and it would be taken seriously.
You should ask her though what she'd like you to call her. Maybe ask her if its ok with her to be your godmother since from what you described your situation is with your real mom, thats what she legally would be if you had to chose someone else to make choices for you in the event that something should happen to you and you could not do it yourself.
i call mine by hers and from other people i know that have a godmother they also call theirs by their first name as well because no matter what happens you still only have ONE real mom, and normally people feel that your real mother can never be truely replaced and take that title from her. (even if she is bat crazy and you dont even talk) lol. ; )
good luck though and have a talk with her and ask her what she would want to be called.
; )
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i am trying to get braces i am 22 i might need them i heard about these behind the braces thing and invisalign i am trying to find out how much they cost and how long will it take i heard just 6 months with behind the teeth (link)
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ok well how long it takes depends on how badly you need them, but from what ive heard the invisalins take about the same amount of time normal braces would take.
the best you thing you can do at this point is just call the front desk at an dental place that offers them and just ask. theres nothing wrong with just calling and saying hello, i have a few questions about braces, im looking to possibly get some but im not sure what kind i need and would like some information. ; )
youll be find, just call, the front desk will tell you whatever you need to know.
if you find you cant afford them and the person over the phone is pushing you to make an appointment just say thanks im still shopping around but ill get back to you.
good luck.
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My boyfriend and I have almost gone all the way with each other. I love him and he loves me..he makes sure to tell me I'm gorgeous an ld beautiful everyday. He's just so nice to me and loves even the worst of my flaws. For the past couple weeks he has wanted to...finger ne and I know that I want it too. The only problem is that I'm insecure about my..down there area.. I'm afraid of what he'll say or think or that it won't be good enough or that something will be wrong with it. I just don't know why I feel this way or how to come to terms with it and accept the way i was made. (link)
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I think thats pretty much what every single person on the face of the planet thinks the first time their about to do ANYTHING naked with someone. lol
so just take it slow and eventually youll let him do it. turn off the lights if you need to the first time.
; )
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My daughter, 21 years old, has always had low self esteem and in most, if not all relationships, has at least mentally cheated with "friends" she has via the internet. I thought this time would be different, but apparently it isn't...last night I caught her texting with a boy. When I confronted her about it, I could tell it was more than just harmless texting - and she never denied that it wasn't more. I told her if I was wrong, then show me the texts and she refused...enough said. The problem is that she's getting married almost exactly a month from today....AND I'm dumping a boat load of money into it!
I know it can't be easy for her to live at home with her step-dad and I, but she's very lazy and very unmotivated. She has never held a full time job and does little around the house - 6 months ago, I told her she needed to make active plans to move out when she told me she was already engaged and moving out anyway. I suspected this marriage was just an escape route to get out of the house.
Last night I talked with her and told her this is a MARRIAGE and serious business...she can't play those foolish games that she did in the past. She can't long to have the attention of every man, because there will only be one now. In two instances of her cheating, I became very good friends with the boys' parents, so honestly, I was very embarrassed when her cheating was exposed. This case is no different...again, I've become very good friends with her fiance's mom and we talk often, even though she lives a couple hours away. During the heart to heart last night, I told her if my suspicions are correct, I will not forgive her this time around because she's already dooming her marriage to fail. You don't go into a MARRIAGE with relationships on the side.
Long story short... I'm beside myself and depressed that she has such issues about herself. She had no answer when I asked her why she does this. Just shrugged her shoulders and looked aloof about it.
What do I do? Have I done all I can by just talking to her and giving her the cold hard facts? It wasn't a short talk....she probably tuned me out after the first 3 1/2 minutes. (link)
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I totally agree with razhie first of all that some pre-marital counseling could be a really great thing for them.
You could use religion like tradition you want to use to get them to do it (even that you pouring money into this and it would make YOU feel better if you knew that this was a serious for real thing) and that if they dont youll with drawl your help money wise. It doesnt have to be a huge deal, act casual about it and give the attitude that everyone else should to with maybe a running theme here of "well when we all are ill or need to go to the doctor to get pills we do that dont we?? this is no different" and to "just consider it a check up from the doctor that you would get yearly to just make sure things are running smoothly" ; )
see?? these are innocent statements you could use with them both and his mother to get her to put pressure on his side of the family to do it if he really loves her.
let me also just say that you are a great mother for being this concerned and going to the lengths that your going to over this. So dont doubt for a moment that you arent doing enough. i think we all know the saying "you can lead a horse to water but you cant make it drink" and you are certainly doing the leading here.
If you have to, offer to take them and sit outside the door if need be. (((sometimes young people are ashamed that they even have to walk into a place like this and just say why they are there, so if you want to ((in a caring way of course)) offer to drive them there, and march right up to the front counter with them)) "since you paid for it, its the least you can do"
that comes off as a "well i bought you this amazing gift that not many couples get to receive before they marry and i want to be there to share it with you as much as i can" type of thing.
its also an under cover "im gonna be making sure your doing this and im gonna be there sitting outside the door to make sure it happens too!" lol. ; )
kind of like an intervention of sorts to get all the issues they might have out on the table before they go through with all this.
you are an amazing mother for trying to do this for them.
good luck sweetie ; )
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We're both boys, age 14. Both of us are straight
We act like we're not bestfriends. Everytime we take a bus, I sleep on his shoulder. Everytime we sleep together we hug each other tightly. We also habittualy say I love you, but most of all, we kiss. I've no idea why we do it. I'm not disturbed by this at all, its fine with me, but it just sounds pretty wrong? When I do it, I feel like the trust between us increases and it feels really good. We both like it and we both understand that it's not a boyfriend kiss.
Do you think it's weird?
And Im really sure we're straight, not bi, but if we're going to end up together, I wont mind, he's fun to be with (link)
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Im going to be a straight shooter here for you, honestly it sounds like you may be confused still about who you are sexually.
I have a big brother and grew up about his friends and they NEVER did things like that. The only thing i remember was them looking at nude mag's or passing around a porn collection with each other. Ive also had and still have straight and gay guy friends, their habits, and their pref.on relationships.
whos to say your one way or the other though other then you?
But from what i know thats not normal straight teenage boy behavior. even for close friends.
So I WOULD SAY, that it sounds like your just bi-sexual but your still maturing and growing as a person so theres no way to know for sure yet.
I think youll be fine, you just maybe need to think more about where you are on your sexuality.
good luck ; )
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There is this boy at my school who is a heartless son of a gun. He makes fun of kids because he is spoiled to the core. I go to the boys and girls club after school and some homeless kids go there and he makes fun of them or other people just because the don't have nikes or Jordan's. When ever he bullies someone I stop it then he wants me to laugh with him and i tell him it's not right but he says "I don't give a f---." And moves on. He also bullies me he calls me gay he punches me puts me in submission holds and the teachers do nothing in sick of it please tell me what I should do. I literally had dreams of killing him tell me what to do.one more thing in in 8th grade and going in to high school a different one than him but I want him to learn a lesson before I leave
(link)
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Does one of his parents come to pick him up from school everyday? maybe if you go up to his mother or father and tell on him personally, and say you just wanted to let them know before the school notices and does something about it, then the parent may take it more seriously and NO parent wants to have to take a day off work to go down to the school to talk to the principal.
if this kid does this to you again, you CAN go to a teacher, tell them what happened and that you cant breathe because he was strangling you like he does to the other kids and if theres any marks from what he did thats even better because then theres proof.
Theres always going to be kids that taunt and tease because they really just feel weak inside and bad about themselves. The key is to find what will make him act right and use that to your advantage. (not promoting any kind of fighting or harm) just saying TALKING to him or getting someone that he WILL listen to, to talk with him about this. Thats why the parent can always be your first line of defense.
If hes doing this to many other kids then get the kids to ALL tell their parents and then maybe even tell THEIR parents if you see them that this kid that to your kid today, i thought you should know, and then walk away. easy as pie right?
No one wants their child treated like that and the complaints will start to pour in once you get parents calling the school and ALL saying it was this one kid. THAT will definitely get the schools attention.
((also they sell nikes and jorden shoes at walmart now, so those arent "high end" shoes anymore so idk where hes getting the idea that their cool still. that style has been "out" since the 90's" lol))
This is the best advice i can give you. If you have a camera and you see him doing things like this to other kids RECORD IT! then show the teacher immediately.
good luck!
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Ok I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 4 years now but we constantly fight and barely get along anymore. I feel like we both have changed and don't know what to do. I recently moved out because I'm tired of the fighting. I love him but I can't handle the fighting anymore. Do I let go of the relationship after 4 years or do I stay in the relationship and try to work it out one more time? I am 20 years old and female and the guy I have been dating as been my high school crush. (link)
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Im going to be really realistic with you here.
If you wernt fighting alot before but the fighting NOW (recently) has become worse then what you can do is stay calm and ask "ok whats this really all about?" because usually when theres non-stop fighting and nit-picking going on its because of what they call an "elephant in the room" type of issue that your both not addressing here and your both VERY stressed out over it.
So just ask him "what is it that you need that im missing because i really dont appreciate your attitude and im not a mind reader, i cant fix something if you dont tell me whats wrong"
then STAY CALM and allow him to vent or talk or do whatever it is he needs to do to relieve himself of the burden he obviously is feeling. say NOTHING and really listen. Do not feed into any kind of BS (aka name calling, nit picking over other minor issues to deflect from whats really going on) and get to the BOTTOM of what is really is.
Sometimes guys dont like to talk about their feelings and he try to deflect (thats a big one) so try to ignore that and say "nooo thats not what this is all about, whats really going on here? why have you been so upset lately???"
then again stay calm, show a blank face and just watch his actions, his talking, and what he has to say. Approach this as a way to get him to spill his guts so that you can pick through the rocky road ice cream and get to the IMPORTANT stuff so it can be dealt with. This is your chance to really find out whats on his mind and if he feels your not doing your part or if hes stressed out about work etc.
Come at him with a "well look im ginuinely concerned here, i want to make things ok again, what do i need to do? i want to hear what you have to say so that i can make it better. Are you going to act accordingly? or are you going to act like a child about this??"
THATS your angle here. Its also what adults in long terms relationships do when their having issues like this.
good luck and i hope you can make this work, just remember to not allow him to get petty and DONT nit pick over small things because at the end of the day your STILL going to have this huge unspoken issue on your hands that you didnt hands because one or both of you were fighting over something petty to try to take the focus away from whats really going on. and remember to STAY CALM, yelling and all this no matter WHAT he says to you is NOT going to help.
then after that you can analyze what he has said and come to your final conclusion about how you feel thigns are going and take it from there!
good luck! ; )
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Hi. So I started talking to this guy. I am 22 and he is 27. We talked for about a month and at first it was amazing. He was so fun and it polite. And then he just got distant. He goes through these cycles where he doesn't talk to me for a while and ignores my calls and texts and waits a week after I've given up and is like where have you been i miss you. Well a little over a week ago he finally called me out of the blue and did the same old, "where have you been, I've been thinking about you, I miss you" then he told me how much he liked me and wanted me and how we would hangout on tuesday and he would call me the next day. I reached out the next day when I got no call and on Tuesday never heard back either time. Why would he tell me all these things and then not talk to me for a long time?
Besides asking him because I doubt he'll be honest any advice on what I should do? or why he is doing this?
Thanks so much in advanced (: (link)
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Well honestly what it sounds like here is that your his "side piece" and that hes getting other play elsewhere and so that would make you not as important to him because he has to keep up appearances as if hes totally devoted to the other chick hes with. (((if that is the case)))
Usually people that are cheating will act like this with their lover because your not as important then their current first one. So going out with them can be flaky and unreliable because they never know whats going to happen next so if something comes up your just tossed to the side.
If thats NOT THE CASE, and your SURE he doesnt have anyone else, then hes flaky and sounds mentally off. No one that really cares about you would do that if they didnt have something else going on in their life that was bigger and more important.
Then he gets upset that your not continuing to chase after him with calls and texts. Then he finally calls back because youve "given up" and are just on the edge of moving on and he doesnt like that because he WANTS you to chase him. It could be that that makes him feel good about himself like alot of girls want him and that he holds all the cards because your just "so head over heels" for him that youll text and call and he has the power to just not answer if he wants while your over here blowing his phone up wondering where he is. see?
it makes sense and this is a realistic possibility in my mind.
i say move on, he should be wanting to spend time with you not the other way around, you deserve better. Walk away like a lady with your head held high while you still can.
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he is my college teacher, married and has a baby girl too. he used to say that i love you and all and i fell for him. he used to take me for drives and all. we have started being physical too. he has touched my boobs. gave me a vaginal massage from outside. i have not let him touch my vagina from inside. i know im very wrong. and i want to end all this. but he is my teacher and that scares me. he can use his powers against me. im realy confused. i want to end all this before it goes too far. please help (link)
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WOW, yeah this is tricky situation you have going on here. Well you could always say to him (if he tries to take you out again or meet after class when your both alone) that you cant help but feel bad for his wife EVEN if hes unhappy with her or she "treats him bad" that you feel really guilty and cant live with yourself if you continue this but that hes "not a bad person" and you wont go and try to do anything to ruin him, but that this just doesnt feel right to you in your heart.
Let him down easy basically and maybe just try to boost his ego by saying hes a good person and that this was all a mistake and that its not totally his fault, you played a part in it too and you feel bad enough about that.
It really isnt cool that hes cheating but for right now you need to try to tell him whatever it is you can to try to both keep him calm, and end things on an OK note.
This really IS a two way street though and you did continue to do this even though you knew he was taken i would assume, so what im telling you to tell him IS mostly true. Im just saying basically to leave out the whole part about his cheating and taking advantage of a student because thats not going to help YOU at this point.
Maybe you could offer to still be friends and keep in touch and if he wants to just talk ever that your here for him ((((just until your done with the class of course not for REAL)))) ; )
I see the situation your in and thats the best way I WOULD handle it. basically "dont piss him off"
good luck though and i hope things work themselves out.
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My boyfriend and I attempted to lose our virginity with each other. We've been together for almost 4 months and its something we both wanted. Even though we're teenagers, we love each other and felt like it was right. The only problem was that when we tried...it wouldn't go in. We both weren't nervous so I doubt that was the problem but it still didn't work. It was an embarrassing situation for me and I really need some advice to make sure that tho doesn't happen the next time. Thanks (link)
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Ok it sounds like he maybe should have started off with fingering you first to loosen things up a little bit so that you would be more prepared for his penis to enter you.
also (and this will be so much more important once your about to have sex for the first time) BUY LUBE, any kind of water based lube even 99 cent store kind will work. If your as tight down there as your saying you are you WILL NEED IT. in order to not rip any surface tissue and then make the actual sex really not pleasurable at all.
youll be fine, that happened to me the first time too.
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I'm obsessed with these two girls Jasmyn and Jasmine kinda hard to choose Jasmyn is kind, loving, good to talk to and loves me like a brother. Jasmine is wild, nice to talk to, I drool over her and she's no angel.im 13 and stuck.im also scared of being denied,because what if the word gets out the she denied me and I'm left in internal sorrow 💔 and won't take the chance to ask someone else. I need a girls advice to tell me what a girl wants and how to ask. Boys tell me how to man up. Plz and thnx!!! (link)
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Well if your very far away then whats the point in pursuing anything if youll most likely never meet them??
if there is and youve hung out before then maybe theres a chance, and usually girls that flirt and kick and hit DO LIKE YOU, they just dont know how to say it either. The only fool proof way i could think of would be to spend time with the person in person. That way you could work off of body language and not have to say anything until your both 100 percent sure things want to go to the next level.
There is no easy way to spill your guts to someone but if youve been together for a while and you both feel like you can talk to each other then it wont be THAT hard. you could try holding hands or hugging and see if it seems like she doesnt want to pull away. little things like that will tell you she likes you back.
you could try asking her how she feels about you first and maybe say "well it felt like there was some chemistry there so i just wanted to ask" most girls like that you want to dig deeper and find out how their feeling. ; )
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What do you do when your dad, who is a crazy, ridiculous control freak tries to dictate who you marry? My dad is insane (I know that's disrespectful to say about your dad and I'm sorry), but he just doesn't want me to be able to run my own life. I've looked up the signs of an overly controlling parent on the internet and he has almost all of them.
I'm an adult (I'm 27) and he tries to control what I eat, what kind of car I drive, who I have as my friends, where and when I go to church, and other such things. Most irritatingly, he tried to control where I went to college, what classes I took, when I moved out of his and my mom's house, and what career path I chose. When I refuse to do as he says, he can have a giant fit and gets C-R-A-Z-Y. He makes me feel smothered and it's extremely unpleasant to be around him.
Now, what would you do if you had a father like this? What would you do if your boyfriend, who you love more than life, asked your father for your hand in marriage and your dad said no. He honestly believes he can stop me from marrying who I want to and I'm afraid of what will happen to our relationship when I go against his wishes.
If your dad just hated your boyfriend and insists that you two won't get married and knows you two are planning to get married against his will. He's threatened to put a stop to it, which he can't, but it's annoying that he thinks he can. It's also scary because he's the kind of guy who'd pull something like ruin the wedding IF he showed up at all. What would you do? (link)
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WOW, first of all im sorry your going through this. Its awful when a parent just cant get themselves together and act like a mature adult.
I dont know what you mean by "he gets crazy" but i hope you can fix this so that he behaves himself.
If he is the type of person that would potentially "try to pull something" as you put it at your wedding then i wouldnt chance it. Depending on how far off the wedding is, you might try staying calm and talking to him logically and saying "if your against my wedding then im sorry but i cant have you there, and i would be sad because i would hope that you would support me in this but im not going to let you ruin my special day"
let him stew on that for a while, and see how he starts acting, see if his actions start to change at all towards you. I would start with small statements here and there to get him thinking about the way hes acting.
Be a little firmer over time and make sure he knows that hes basically on probation from this point on if hes going to be allowed to be at your wedding. most importantly stay calm, dont feed into the BS and yell or show emotion back. usually overly emotionally people feed off your reaction so whatever you do just stay calm, show a blank face, and just stare and see how he reacts if hes surprised by that at all.
you could also try saying things in a very calm quiet manner, without ness. making eye contact but letting him know in a casual off handed way that "well if your going to act like this then...." and then add on to whatever it is you want to say.
If he wants to burn bridges with people that care about him then hes going to die alone and even more unhappy then he already is.
usually ill throw that one in there, in a calm manner while also letting them know that they are over reacting and are ruled by nothing but their emotions.
Tell him he needs to have conversations WITH you instead of at you, and to respectfully let you know when hes ready to do that and youll be open to it. Until then you may need to ignore him, move out with your boyfriend, stop taking his calls, or whatever to MAKE him see that whatever hes doing NOW isnt helping so he should probably stop.
good luck! and i hope it goes well!
congrats on getting married!
; )
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