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hi guys
first off, i have been friends w/ a guy for around 6 months now. we have flirted and kissed and stuff but it has never really got serious. he saw me talking to another guy once and since then he thinks i like anyone but him. anyway we had a fall out in november, and at the beginning of january he apoligised to me and said he missed me etc.
now hes like wanting to see me a lot, he never made this effort before. is it me being paranoid or do you think hes actually just changed his mind?
Hi,
I think he just got jealous for a moment when he seen you with the other guy and needed a little time to think whether he really wanted you more than the other guy..
When he came back and apologized, that was a big step for him. He definately wants to be with you or else he would not have come back and apologized :)
I think he changed his mind, hes in it for you now. I would take him back if you truly love and trust him.
Only over time, will you find if you are meant to be
What I have noticed lately is that many people stress about what other people do.
I try not to but everyone does.
What do you think the world would be like if people didn't care what others did?
And just worried about their own life, with a few exceptions.
Do you think it would be chaotic or peaceful?
Examples: paparazzi and what magazines print.
Hi there,
It is good that you notice that others stress about what others do, because this means that you are aware of your surroundings.
I believe that if everyone didn't care what others did, life would be peaceful for some and chaos for others. Such as, if you only cared about yourself, you may become self centered, lonely, demanding, have little/no friends, never feel love for others, become aggressive, and make negative changes in our world (for everyone needs someone to back them up, or support them, or a shoulder to lean on).
Or if you only are aware of yourself, you will become aware of your likes and dislikes, you will help yourself find peace with yourself and everyone around you, you would make change for the better, you will see life more clearer, and you will learn not to take things for granted.
It all depends on the individual person, the environment they live in, and the outside influences they expirience. Everyone is different, and therefore its a debatable topic. I think the media is a definate influence on people, some of the influence is good and some is bad unfortunately, but everyone sees things differently. For example: if you tell someone you like green, they could have a picture of green in their head BUT it might be deep green, where you are thinking of a different color known as leaf green. In general it is the same color.. but if you take a closer look there is much more than just the color name. When I say green, it is never the same shade you are thinking of, it is a completely different view.
It is definately something to think about. Most people don't stop to think about why they are worried about the things they are worried about. Is it really worth it? Maybe the other person sees the other side of a situation.
Whatever the reason is for caring what others do, it must have something to do with our heart. When you think something is right, you tend to get involved.
When making a change, you have to care
he told me on wednesday that we need to take a break becuase he needs time.
and i asked him how long he wont talk to me for and he said idk.
everything has been fine between us so that whole needing a break thing seriously came out of nowhere.
were in a long distance relationship so i dont understand why he needs a break. its not like we get to see eachother alll the time like normal couples.
ive called and texted him a bunch of times and have gotten nothing back. its been three days since he hasnt talk to me and its killing me.
no matter what i say to him, he wont talk to me.
i dont know what to do :[
help meee!
Hi there,
Sometimes guys just need some time alone to think about their life, just as you would. If everything was fine and then he just doesn't want to talk, I wouldn't be too worried. He may be having a few complications at home, or is tired, or just wants some time to think about his relationship, but he is not putting you out of his mind. He may think that you are a little attached to him though if you text and call him constantly.
Give him some space. Only call him or text him once in the afternoon. If he responds, say 'hey, I was wondering how you were' or 'I was just thinking about you' or 'I was wondering if we could try to get together sometime'. All you can do is be patient, keep trying once a day to talk to him, give him space, and he will come around.
Do not miss a day without calling or texting him just once. This lets him know you do want the relationship, you are thinking about him, and you do care about his personal needs. Once he realizes you are trying and he needs to do his part, it will work out.
When a guy you love puts you on hold, hold him with your heart
My boyfriend has genital herpes and we have had sex a few times over the past six months. We're always really safe and use a condom each time. I haven't really worried about catching it but two days ago part of my vagina was weird and like inflamed. It was uncomfortable. I checked it out better with a mirror and it looks like his herpes only on me down there. I thought condoms protect you from STDs but now it looks like maybe they don't for me? What do you think? Is it herpes?
Hi,
Sorry to tell you.. yes, you can get any STD even with the use of condoms. A lot of people mistake that, if they use a condom they won't get pregnant or contract an STD at all, but then theres the truth. Condoms are never 100% effective and so they don't always give you full protection.
With a condom the virus may possibly be ruduced;it is not confimed yet though. If you didn't have sex when your boyfriend was activily affected with herpes, the chance you have it is very small.
Yes, condoms could protect you from some STD's. Luckily herpes isn't one of the worse ones. Herpes does not spread too easily. It spreads from skin to skin contact with an open sore.
If you think you have Herpes, I would go to the doctor and get it checked as soon as possible. You could tell your boyfriend you are going and he could be your support since he knows what it is like and he will love you no matter what.
Here is a great website that isn't too lengthly that will help you with anything you may need: http://www.globalherbalsupplies.com/herpes/prevention.html
I wish you the best, and hope that this helps. Only a doctor will know if it is or is not herpes. Never be afraid to do what you know is right
If you had to pick one thing that bothers you about your relationship that you feel needs to change so that the relationship can be successful what would that be? Please elaborate...
Hi there,
I would say communication. Not that I have a problem with it in my relationships right now. But, Every relationship goes through some kind of communication error at some point in time.
I assume you are talking about a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship.. so..
If a couple knows how to talk to one another in a respectful manner, know when one another is in a good or bad mood, and know how to handle the situation without creating more conflict, you have successful communication.. which in return gives you a successful relationship.
If you cannot talk about your problems, they will never be solved. If you cannot talk about your daily life with someone, you should not share your life with them. If you cannot share your heart through words and emotions to someone, you are not truly living within them.
When a person says they love you, say you love them too. When a person smiles at you, smile back at them. When a person holds you close to them, hold them close to you. When a person touches your shoulder, touch thier shoulder back ;)
Talking isn't the only way you communicate...
Whether it is a little thing or big, you must talk to have a good relationship.
Communication... is success
I dont have much space so I'll try to make this brief... I've been knowing this guy for 5 years. The first year I knew him he tried his hardest to try and get me to be his girlfriend. I always rejected until he gave up and started going out with someone that was actually paying attention to him. They ended up going out for a year and in that year I had also gotten a boyfriend. The guy was upset when he found out since I always told him I didnt want a bf. During that year that we were both in relationships we still kept in touch. when he broke up with her, my bf and i had also broken up. so we started talking again; about 3 months later he tells me his ex had called him and hes confused doesnt know how he feel for her... whatever. I told him he can go figure it out but I wasn't gonna be there... so he would break up with her to come to me and stop talking to me to be with her he was always indecisive so I just stopped talking to him, about a month later he calls apologizing for everything hes put me through,etc. Things were perfect for a couple of months. then i call him to put things on a break because I was busy with school and work, unfortunately i let him speak first and he says he's going to take my advice and just have fun, he was going through something sort of like a depression and i told him to just have fun. I didnt mind we still kept each other posted on what we did through out the day etc. then about a month later he goes away to see his friend for his bday, little did i know that one of our mutual friends that i met through him was going to be there. she had made out with him in the past but they both assured me it was nothing, after i see she had posted the pics on facebook i ask her and after a couple of hours of speaking she admits they made out. i keep seeing she puts pics of them up and idk if its to get me mad or what. a couple of months later we happen to be in the same place at the same time and we go for a walk, he tells me the real reason why him and i stopped talking was because he was getting attached almost falling in love and it had scared him,after that my friends told me i shouldnt see that girl as a threat because maybe hes just using her. we already had 4 years knowing each other/ talking/ being a couple though it was on and off. It just got me upset that it seemed as if he gave her so much attention, even invited her to his school upstate. i shouldve know she always like him because she had applied to the school he was previously in, thank god he had already transferred out. he always calls. texts me randomly and i guess its just to keep me in his radar, but why. I had never had sex with him until a couple of weeks ago and he was actually my first. He's still keeping me at a distance and just bothers me randomly. I had deleted him on facebook but sometimes he writes things about me to his friends or to me through a post on one of our mutual friends pages. he's also been saying unnecessary things about one of my friends that is doing a video blog with one of his friends. I mean I try not pay any mind, to anything and then he would start mentioning my name... very immature acts. idk if he does these things to get my attention or what so i act like if it doesnt bother me and just ignore it. I just wish he would come to his senses and just commit. and whats the point of these immature comments? and whats the point of that stupid girl that he did something with?
Hey,
I think this guy is a little mixed up himself. As in, if he is trying to get you so bad, then actually gets you and goes for another girl.. his head isn't really all in it for you. He needs to make a decision. Either you or her. It is definately not right to go looking for two girls instead of one he can truly commit to. This other girl might have been his way of trying to make you jealous, trying to see how much you care for him, or it might just be him trying to impress his friends. Whatever the reason, there should not be one.
His immature comments are probably a way to impress his friends or show you off to everyone.
If there is anything you should do, you should get him alone with you. When you are alone with him, tell him exactly how you feel about the situation and tell him that he needs to commit, be honest, and prove that the love he had for you is still there. If he truly loves you, it shouldn't be a problem giving you some real signs.
He most likely mentions your name for he cannot stop thinking about you. When he finally realizes it, he should bring you closer to his heart and you will feel a connection. After you both know what is happening in one anothers heads, you will be able to move forward in your relationship. Sometimes, guys just don't catch on. You have to explain how you feel about them or they may never figure it out.
With love comes difficulties, but with fixing those difficulties... comes a stronger realationship. Trust what your heart tells you
so i'm trying to loose weight and i've bee using these dieting pills that were recommended tro me by my aunt. i'v been taking them around 6pm at night right after of before i excercise and then i noticed that on the bottle for the pills it says you should take it before breakfast but i always forget because in the mornings it's a real rush for me. so i was wondering if it really matteerd when i took them? and does it still have the effect if i take them at 6pm when i come home from work?
Hi,
There are certain medications that are made to be taken at a certain time a day for a certain reason. It could be that the morning is the best time of day for your body to absorb the pill and get the total effect of it, or it could be that it is made so that you don't sleep on it, if you know what I mean. You are probably suppose to take them in the morning, for breakfast is the most important meal of the day and it is when your body starts up and starts producing energy. It is always best to do what the bottle says. Try having an alarm clock to wake you up or have something to remind you to take them in the morning. No one, but a doctor will know if it will have the same affect at night. Ask your doctor if it is okay, that is the best answer you can get
First of all i would like to say thank you to all those people who told me to stick with my vow, b/c it turns out he was playing me anyway.(God my love life sucks)anyway i had this friend with benefits over the summer who helped me get over some serious greif, and we kinda became attached to each other, he's the only person who knowd my deepest secrets. And we contiuned being friends with benefits until say mid-nov. Recently i found he has a girlfriend and that kinda broke my heart...not tht im not happy for him or anything thats not the case. its just the fact that whenever we were together it was like we were going out...that and people expected me to go out with him. Now, whenever im around him i get a hollow feeling and when hes with his girlfriend(who hates me for being ex-friends with benefits)i want to burst out crying. Question: What am i supposed to do about that heavy chemistry between us?
PS we still hang out and goof off.
thxx-olie 14/f
Hey,
If he had a girlfriend, he obviously played you again.. and you don't need that kind of crap from anyone. If people expect you to go out, that does not mean you have to. You run your own life and you make your own decisions. No other opinion should ever matter, yours is the one that counts. The hollow feeling you get, is the feeling of hurt. Obviously you really like this guy and he hurt you pretty bad, and no matter what you really want to tell him how you truly feel, but you are speechless for it hurts so much. What you should do, is confront him. Get him alone with you and tell him exactly how you feel. That is the only way any of this is going to be resolved. Tell him: you are the only guy I really trusted; you know me the best, you treated me like I was the only one, and I want to know why you would hurt me. Tell him you really want to make the best of your relationship and you would like to try again (if he truly feels the same way), but only if he respects you and will be honest. Who knows if he is really wanting to date this other girl, maybe he is just using her to make you jealous.. which isn't good either. You will never know how to sort it out, unless you know how one another is feeling. Set the mood, talk it out, and he will likely show you his true self. Then you can decide if he is in it for you or not. Stay positive, confront him, and whatever happens, remember to trust what your heart tells you
I want to learn how to play a specific song on the piano. It's not too complex, but not easy either.
I've never played piano before, nor can I read sheet music. I intend to learn to play it through a video tutorial on youtube that basically tells you which keys to press, in which sequence, and for how long (it's already helped me a little).
Any tips on this?
And is it better to learn how to play the song one hand at a time (if so, which hand is best to start with?) and then combine the two, or learn the song little by little with both hands?
Hi,
See if you could learn to play a scale. A scale is the basic step to learning any song. The most common scale is the C scale.
If you look at your piano, there are three black keys (or music notes) close together above the white keys. THEN there are two black keys that are together above the white keys. If you find the two black keys, then the first white key before the first black (of the two), is the C note.
Your fingering when playing a C scale should be one (thumb),two (pointer),three (middle finger),THEN move your thumb under your third finger, and on the d note it starts over: one,two,three,four,five. If that makes any sense.. If it doesn't check out some C scale videos and see if you can figure it out. You could always try playing by ear as well :)
As for playing with which hand, if you are right handed learn your right hand first and if you are left handed, start with your left hand first. Then, learn your opposite hand and finally, put it all together.
It is always easier if you learn your hands separate then put them together. If I were you, I would go to google images, then find a picture of a piano with the notes written on the keys. It will help you alot when you are learning.
I am glad you are trying to teach yourself to play the piano. I am sure you can do it! Practice lots. Patience is the key. Only with patience will you be successful
I like this girl, and we talk alot. We hug, but we're just friends. I want to ask her out, but I'm afraid she'll say no. I don't take rejection well. I mean, she might say no, but she might say yes. We are in middle school. I'm in 8th grade and she's in 7th grade. What should I do?
Hi,
I would definately try. Ask her! If she says no, it might be because she is shy or nervous. She could really like you too, and I think you have a good chance because you two are friends. Also you have a close bond, I can tell because she allows you to hug her :)
If she says no, just keep being friends as normal, and sooner or later she may ask you out for she would already know how you feel. Or you could ask her again after a few weeks and I am sure she may change her mind once she thinks about it.
You will never know unless you ask, and once you do.. im sure it will all work out
I know that I have anxiety. My mom has it and I'm starting to get like her. I used to be able to control it, so it wasn't an issue, but lately it has been taking over my life. Does anyone have any tips to helping with this other than taking medication? My mom takes meds for it and she doesn't want me to start, because she said I'll never get off them and I'll rely on them for life. Thank you for any help. I just want to feel better.
Hey there,
No matter what people tell you, there is Always a natural way to curing anything.
In your case, try relaxing. Relax your body the best you can. It will allow you to let things go, stay positive, have fun, and just live life to the fullest. Relaxing your body and your mind will help great amounts by keeping your emotions in control as well. Accept, forgive, and you will find this place. Relaxation results in calmness and calmness results in a cure. Meditate, go for a walk, read a good book, soak yourself up in a nice warm bath full of bubbles. Do something that you know is relaxing and is something you enjoy doing. When you are doing things you love, you will always be successful. When you are successful, you have met your goal
I'm 15 and I've been going out with this girl for a few months now and she tells me that she has a hard time trusing people because of things that had happened in her past. It's not previous bf's or anything because i'm her first real boyfriend. she says she really does try to trust me but but its hard for her. She started to tell me about her past and stuff and i can already start to see why but I really do love her and she does love me and i really want her to be able to trust me, she has had too much happen to her in her life and i just want to be there for her, be someone she can talk to and confide to but thats kinda hard if she has troble trusting me and i know she wants to be able to trust me too. I know in time she'll learn to trust me but i want to know if there is anyway I can help start to trust me more. What confuses me is that she trusts me enough to basicly tell me her entire life story but not enough to to tell me about the small things that are bothering her because she like hides her emotions from others because all her life no one really cared about her feelings so she hides them so i never know when something is bothering her unless she tells me. Also we arn't together that often because she has strict parents and stuff, so we talk mostly on AIM.
She has been putting up this wall to cover up her feelings and emotions for years now. all of her emotions have stayed bottled up for so long and she almost never takes down that barier because of her difficulty with trusting others. and i am ALMOST NEVER with her. her parents rules are like for her to come to my house one of my parents have to be home and one of her parents have to be home at her house whitch is kinda stupid. and if i go to her hpuse i can only be there for an hour, even more stupid. and we cant be with each other after school on school days and stuff except for the occasional football game which isnt wat i want really i want to be alone with her so that we can just talk privitly but thats another one of her dads rules we cant be alone togehter. so anything really deep o personl we talk about is on the computer.
I have told her all of this before she just has such a hard time trusting people bcuz of her past
Please can anyone help me????????
Hey there,
I know exactly (maybe not exact.. but very very close) how your girlfriend may be feeling. I sometimes wonder if what a person has to do to earn my trust, could possibly not be enough. My life has been difficult as well.
What I can tell you, is that you sound like a very genuine guy who would do anything to prove you are a real gentleman. I think the only way you can have her trust you, is if you show her consistantly over and over, that you will stick to your word. And by doing so, prove that the words you speak are honest/true. Only then will she trust/believe you.
It is not going to happen overnight, or in days, not even in weeks probably.. but no matter what, you must remain consistant with your words, your actions, and your love for her. Try to make more time for you two to spend one on one with eachother, no matter what it might take. When two people are alone, it not only builds up the relationship, but the trust as well. Even if there are rules in her house, obey them and make sure you can spend even those little moments with her. It is better than no moments.
Doing so can also make her parents realize how much they can trust you, which can, in return build up your girlfriends trust. AND, if her parents trust you, they are definately more likely to allow you to be alone with their daughter.
Try this one thing: consistancy; And your world with her will change for the better.
Only when she decides so, you will be allowed in. Only when you show her what true love is, she will allow you in
14/m
There is this girl in my 1st Hour Class. She seems like a nice person and all but i wanna be her friend and maybe more. How can i start a conversation with her to lead us to friends and them maybe more?
Hi,
Starting a conversation can be very easy, if you have courage. And everyone has courage inside of them, sometimes it is just hidden. Start off by saying hi to her everyday :) She will soon start opening up and talking more to you. When people see how nice someone else is, they can't help but try to gain some of that positive energy. You could ask her a question such as: 'how has your morning been?', 'could I use your eraser?' or something casual. You could compliment her, say: 'I like your binder', 'Nice shoes', or 'awesome sweater'. You could also ask her for help with an assignment. She will feel glad that she could help.
Basically, just be yourself and go for it. That is what will make her interested, discovering Y-O-U
i am a 16 year old female and I'm gay. It's a girl I like that i knew for a few years now. She's not gay though but she said she'll think about it for me. It's been a few weeks and I want to see where we stand now. i want to know if she wants to continue being friends or if she wants more from our relationship. How do i ask her this without me sounding so desperate and without making her feel forced into the situation?
Hi,
I would casually ask her if she had thought about being more than friends, and then see where it goes from there. Being casual makes you sound 'not desperate'. She won't feel forced as long as you aren't demanding an answer.
Since you have known her for a few years I am sure she will understand where you are coming from. If she says no, do not take it to the heart, just say 'okay I was just wondering' and move on in your friendship. If she says she will think about it, that probably means she is still unsure or would just like to continue being good friends. Just be yourself and no worries
So I met this guy Kirk at a bar the other night and I thought he was so sexy. I thought he kept looking at me but then I turned and he'd be looking elsewhere. Well my friend works with him and he asked my friend if I was in a relationship with my guy friend I was hanging out with. He told my friend I had a lot of spunk and that it was a great asset. I take it as he likes me what do you think? How should I pursue this further with him? Any ideas? I just got this news today and it made my day!! Thanks! :)
Hi,
How do you know he was really looking elsewhere? Maybe he wasn't... maybe he was... I think he may like you, but you will never know for sure unless you see him again and make a move.. such as looking him in the eyes and holding his attention for a minute. First you have got to talk to him though to make sure he is interested or is at least a suitable (single!) candidate. You don't want to get yourself in too deep if its not worth it. But, I would definately talk to him. If it goes out well and you get along with him, you could flirt a little, wink at him, touch his shoulder, and maybe one time you could order him a drink from across the bar ;) Just be friendly and outgoing.. It should go smoothly from there
go to the encino bally's which is a really middle-eastern area.Ever since i went there 3 years ago,the whites and others have taken a likng to me,even though i'm an eastern-asian-person.During that time,me and her didn't really hit it off,because we had some differences,but i just keep getting people taking a liking to me,and she(even though at times i tried to patch things up and vice versa)still always tries to stab me in the back at times.I don't know if this is a racial issue,because no one else there has a problem with me even thoigh i'm kind of an outsider in a different area(not alot of east-asians there)What;s her deal? I went off on her a few times in the past,but that was because i thought she was being unfair in her actions towards me.She's really nice to every other background,whites,blacks,mexicans,and of coures mid-easterners,.Sh'es tried to make an effort to be nicer but now i just ignore her,I didn't act in the best of ways,but i'm wondering what her problem is?she's even nice to my friends,but i just tell them that i don't like her and i just act like she doesn't exist.Last time she really noticed i blew her off.Anyway,what's her deal deep down?Other people have said that she is a really sweet person..Anyway,i ran into her in the hallway by the elipticals,and i said hi,ands she responded and said how are you doing?i had no choice but to say hi because she was right in front of me when we were passing by,but i'm still ticked at her,it's like she left some scars and doesn't seem to care that she left them even if it was years(2-3)ago..
Hi,
Obviously this girl doesn't have that much of a problem if she is reaching out to you, trying to be nicer, and said 'Hi' to you in the hallway. I think you shouldn't hold what happened in the past against her, it sounds as if she is working to let it go, but the only way you two are going to be friends again is if you also try to be nice to her, smile, Do Not Ignore Her, and don't bring up the past. I doubt she has a problem with your race, she sounds like an accepting person. She may just be a little confused about how you feel right now and therefore there is a bit of awkwardness between you two (since you also are confused about her). Another thing is that if you want to be friends with her again, you have to communicate! When you have some alone time with her (or casually/nicely get her alone with you for a few minutes) tell her how you feel. Calmly and firmly tell her that she left some scars on you and that you would like to be friends with her, but you still feel like she hurt you (remember to not meaningfully bring up the past again after this conversation, unless she casually brings it up). Talk it out, listen to her side of what happened, and hopefully you will both come to understanding eachother and won't have to continue going on this way. If you continue to ignore her or not acknowledge her, you will get nowhere. Also, do not tell others you don't like her and then hope that she will stop acting this way, because as soon as she finds out what you said she will never be nice to you. You have to give a little love to get a little love, that is just how life works. Once you talk to her nicely, she will be more nice to you. It may not come right away, but healing takes time. You have to have patience and show kindness towards her. Only then will things change for the better
15/f
So me and this guy have been going out for a month. I have no idea what to get him. He said he just wanted to be surprised and want something from the heart. Sooo I have no idea what to get him. Are stuffed animals weird to give to guys? Just any ideas would help. Thanks!
Hey,
Nah, stuffed animals are always nice gifts. Unless of course he really doesn't like them.. Which I doubt because who doesn't! Just make sure its a manly kind of stuffed toy, he wouldn't want anything girly ;)
When a guy says he wants something from the heart, get him something you know he will love (such as something he has been wanting for a while now), or something he can eat! Guys always love baked goodies. They always say the way to a guys heart is through his stomach, haha. Even if you could just bake him some chocolate chip cookies and put them in a wrapped box with a ribbon. He will definately love anything that you make yourself. Its the thought that counts! You could make him a cd with all his favorite songs (or just songs he likes) on it. You could get him and yourself tickets to a movie that is just coming out, buy him an awesome cap if he likes wearing hats, get him a fuzzy blanket for when its cold (hes guaranteed to put it on his bed and think about you before he goes to sleep), or get him a gift certificate for his favorite store. That way he can buy whatever he wants.
OR You could always fill a gift bag with some popcorn packages, seasonings, and a new movie so that when he opens it.. you can snuggle in and watch a late night movie with him ;) It is the simple things that mean the most and are what people remember and love the most :)
See to it that you both are involved, and im sure he will love it no matter what!
17/f I'm a junior in high school and the school has a little over 4000 kids. I have many friends and they are all in different groups. The amount of close personal good friends I've made since freshman is around 30. amount best friend has made 0. She gets jealous easy and doesn't get along with my friends (almost cost me one of my best friends) so I've tried to get her friends with some of my friends. She always had complaints, they partied too much, too stuck up, too punkish, too hippie, etc. But I have a few friends who were just average and nice. She hardly talked! It's really irritating and she is my bestest friend when were alone but with others? Is no fun at all.
Hey there,
Your best friend sounds like a great girl. Maybe you have more friends because you are more outgoing, open to everyone, and are an overall fun girl to be with. I'm not saying your bestie is not like this, but maybe she has more expectations on what she wants in a friend and only wants a few best friends. What I mean is that maybe she is looking for another person that is like you: who understands her like you do and who she knows will always be there.
She could be content with just having you as her best friend and having you around. Friends are always going to get jealous at some time in life, but its not your fault. You should try talking to her and tell her that no matter what, she will be your best friend and that if she wants to go with you to a movie (or do something else) with your other friends, she is always welcome too. And make sure she is welcome, such as telling your group of friends she will be coming and to try to help her feel welcome in the group. You cannot force her to do anything, but just by offering your best friend to come along or making special time to spend with her alone will make her feel less jealous and know you aren't 'dumping' her for someone else.
Be firm with her, keep inviting her to your get-togethers and she will eventually sneak her way into your 'click'. If she is shy, she will learn to open up to others once you show her how nice the other friends are. Of course she will not just jump onto your buddy train, but in time she will see that there are more people out there than just you and will be able to greet others herself.
Some people are content with being best friends with only one person. Your friend is probably happy just hanging out with you, not having to worry about other people, sharing secrets, watching movies, and painting toenails with you, etc. Doing one on one girl things, you know? You should try and spend at least a few days a week doing one on one things together so she does not feel neglected and knows you still like hanging with her. She may feel as if she is losing you to other people and doesn't know how to tell you.
But all in all, just try try try to include her in any activity you do with your other friends. Even if its a simple 'hey im going to do ____ at ____'s place and I was wondering if you would like to come' or including her in a conversation by saying 'do you like this _____?' taking her opinion. That way she always knows you offered and were thinking of her. Eventually she will give in,open up and accept the invitation.
It is the caring friendship that makes her love being your best friend. And with a little boost, you can help her to finding another great friend like you
So, i'm 17, a guy...theres this girl that i really like, but im not sure if she likes me. She goes to a different school, but we text all the time, and i visit her at work sometimes, and we hang out on the weekends. I know she used to like me, but she stopped. now, i dont know...like, i know some of those "signs" and i notice them sometimes, like she smiles a lot around me and we flirt and whatnot, but sometimes i just get the vibe that we're just friends. now the other day, i was driving her home, and we were "fighting" over the radio (you know, we weren't actually arguing or fighting.) and anyway, in order to stop me from changing the station, she held my hand. and she did so, almost the entire way to her house. so basically, i just want your opinion on this situation, and if i were to ask her out, what's a way to do it other than, "will you go out with me..." i absolutely hate that, haha.
Hey,
So, theres this girl, she hangs out with you on weekends, texts you, and gives you signs. How exactly do you know that she stopped liking you? ;)
She is gaining your affection by flirting, smiling, and holding your hand.. It sounds as if she is definately trying to get your attention and make her feelings clear to you.
Sometimes when a person feels as if they are 'just friends' they are actually thinking 'I wish we could be more'. Yes, I think she is interested and I think you should go for it!
As for ways of asking her out, get her alone, that will help set a one on one mood. Look her in the eyes, always. Expecially if asking her face to face. You could slip her a hand written note in her pocket saying 'I love how you... (fill in the blank)' and if she questions it, you can say 'it is what keeps me attracted to you everyday'. You could send her her favorite candy and say 'I know it wont make you any sweeter, but I thought you might like it anyhow'. You could send her a special gift that she has been wanting and tell her 'just thinking about you... always'. You could be having a casual conversation and then say 'I think we should be more than friends'. You could hold her in your arms and whisper 'I want us to always be together', or if you want you could send her a key with a note saying 'to my heart'. There are many ways; find something she will appreciate and go with it. Let your heart tell her
Cutting to the chase:
My best friend and I had been planning to get an apartment together for about a year. She joined a sorority last semester and she clicked with two other girls in her sorority. Meanwhile, she was talking to me about still getting an apartment together.
The other day, she told me she had been talking about getting an apartment together with her sorority sisters at the same time and that she was going to live with them next year instead. BASICALLY, she told me all our plans of living together were not gonna happen because I'm not in her sorority.
Now I have to figure out my housing situation next year (I don't have any one else I would live with) and there's this awkward tension between her and I.
This really hurts my feelings. I told her and she was like "Yes, I know I pulled a douche move, but I feel like you'll have other options. I know what I did was bad, but I want you to know I'm still your friend."
I just feel like I hit a brick wall. I hate my college. I have no one to live with next year. The person I thought was my best friend is leaving me for two other girls. I see friendships this year dwindling because of housing situations. It's hard to maintain friendships when one is living off campus and the other is on.
Any advice? I need to move forward, but I don't know how.
Hey there,
I know exactly how you feel. You don't want to live alone, you want her as a closer friend, and life is rough.
If she totally blew you off, then maybe she really wasn't your friend.. I know someone just like this. There was this girl, we were best friends for at least seven years and then she justs uses me and dumps our friendship for my brother (whos a complete jerk/player). Exactly as your 'friends' did to you. And if your friend knew what she was doing was going to frustrate you, then again.. not really a friend.
Did you tell her that friends don't treat friends like crap? She shouldn't of just dumped all your plans together without asking you if that was alright. You asked her first about the housing situation.
I think you should confront her and say 'I did not appreciate it when you dumped me for no reason when we had plans the whole time. I have no one to live with now, and no, I do not have other options'. Make sure you are alone with her and tell her firmly. If you want, say you would like to continue to be friends but only if she will have more respect for you.
You should not let housing situations bring down your friend life. Friends are everywhere, you just have to go searching. Get involved in an activity you like, say Hi to people you normally wouldn't, smile at everyone, and don't be afraid to be yourself. If you have time, ask if you could come in and visit someone on campus (or off if you are on). Try to get close to someone in one of your classes.
It may be hard at times, but stay positive, smile, keep organized, make time to be with people, communicate, and don't forget to give yourself some leisure time to do what you love and relax. Friends will likely come to you if you are happy and comfortable with yourself.
You can achieve anything. And if you have to... let go and move on. You are your number one friend after all; sometimes it is easier that way