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I need help getting my grilfriend to trust me more.
I'm 15 and I've been going out with this girl for a few months now and she tells me that she has a hard time trusing people because of things that had happened in her past. It's not previous bf's or anything because i'm her first real boyfriend. she says she really does try to trust me but but its hard for her. She started to tell me about her past and stuff and i can already start to see why but I really do love her and she does love me and i really want her to be able to trust me, she has had too much happen to her in her life and i just want to be there for her, be someone she can talk to and confide to but thats kinda hard if she has troble trusting me and i know she wants to be able to trust me too. I know in time she'll learn to trust me but i want to know if there is anyway I can help start to trust me more. What confuses me is that she trusts me enough to basicly tell me her entire life story but not enough to to tell me about the small things that are bothering her because she like hides her emotions from others because all her life no one really cared about her feelings so she hides them so i never know when something is bothering her unless she tells me. Also we arn't together that often because she has strict parents and stuff, so we talk mostly on AIM.
She has been putting up this wall to cover up her feelings and emotions for years now. all of her emotions have stayed bottled up for so long and she almost never takes down that barier because of her difficulty with trusting others. and i am ALMOST NEVER with her. her parents rules are like for her to come to my house one of my parents have to be home and one of her parents have to be home at her house whitch is kinda stupid. and if i go to her hpuse i can only be there for an hour, even more stupid. and we cant be with each other after school on school days and stuff except for the occasional football game which isnt wat i want really i want to be alone with her so that we can just talk privitly but thats another one of her dads rules we cant be alone togehter. so anything really deep o personl we talk about is on the computer.
I have told her all of this before she just has such a hard time trusting people bcuz of her past
Please can anyone help me????????
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Hey there,
I know exactly (maybe not exact.. but very very close) how your girlfriend may be feeling. I sometimes wonder if what a person has to do to earn my trust, could possibly not be enough. My life has been difficult as well.
What I can tell you, is that you sound like a very genuine guy who would do anything to prove you are a real gentleman. I think the only way you can have her trust you, is if you show her consistantly over and over, that you will stick to your word. And by doing so, prove that the words you speak are honest/true. Only then will she trust/believe you.
It is not going to happen overnight, or in days, not even in weeks probably.. but no matter what, you must remain consistant with your words, your actions, and your love for her. Try to make more time for you two to spend one on one with eachother, no matter what it might take. When two people are alone, it not only builds up the relationship, but the trust as well. Even if there are rules in her house, obey them and make sure you can spend even those little moments with her. It is better than no moments.
Doing so can also make her parents realize how much they can trust you, which can, in return build up your girlfriends trust. AND, if her parents trust you, they are definately more likely to allow you to be alone with their daughter.
Try this one thing: consistancy; And your world with her will change for the better.
Only when she decides so, you will be allowed in. Only when you show her what true love is, she will allow you in <3
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Divine
I understand where you girl-friend is coming
form when you go through alot it hard to always
believe anyone words so the only thing that you can do is
sho your action, like others say "action speak louder then words"
you can tell her that you won't do this and that your not like that and she can open up to you
but in her mind all it is just words
you to show her that she can trust you telling
is nothing but a whole bunch of letters joined together to make a word...
Merry christmas
&
Happy new years
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