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Q: Okay, I don't really know where to begin, but I guess to start, I just really really want to die. I hate my life so so much, everything that has ever ment something to me is gone. I feel so hopeless ALL THE time, and no one even knows. Im just this little pretty sweet quiet girl at school, but EVERY day, and mainly all day i have these weird crying attacts, when i scream and cry and throw-up. (im home alone alot) And i know why i do, its because of the way i think. Im really complex, and i feel so emty all the time, and i try try so hard to make myself happy but i cant. Sometimes ill get amazingly happy, and then the next day ill take so many pills just wanting to die. When i shorta drop hint arounds my parents... they just kind of laugh and say its just teenage behavior. But they dont know how lonely i get, and how i just dont have the strenght to deal with anything.
I dont want to be weak...
I dont want to be selfish...
And i dont want to be on stupidfcking medicene that makes me feel nothing...
I just want to live my life for God, And see TRUE beauty... which i do see soemtimes... but i always want to die sometimes...
I just don't know what to do... how to over come something...
like ive take personality disorder test online(stupid i know) but im VERY HIGH in the majority of them... but i dont know if being diognoust(cant spell) will help anything. Please give me advice on what i should do,

First off, just go see a doctor, let his see whatever he can see and hear him out, then decide to take his advice or not.
If he does suggest you go to a psychiatrist or whatever, they can't force you to take any drugs, I told mine that I didn't want to take it and that was it.
But, what I later discovered about anti-depressants is that it makes you not feel anything long enough for your emotions to level out and for you to hear what the psychiatrist is actually trying to show you, which IF its a good doctor should be what you want for yourself.

Give me a email if you just want to talk, I could use another friend, No advice!

Best to you!

Q: I am having a little problem right now. I feel like I have lost my fire and drive for success. I make stellar grades and I hold top positions around campus. About a month ago, I had major surgery and I was on loritab off and on for about 3 weeks. I have a strong feeling that the loritab caused my lack of energy and my apathy for about everything.

What can I do to get my motivation back? And what can I do to get back to how I was before my surgery?

I'm going to have to tell you, you can't go back, only forward.
If it is only the meds, then it should wear off by itself.
Try not to think too much, relax and have fun!

Write down a couple of (reasonable) things you would like to do, throw them in a hat, draw one, give yourself a reasonable amount of time to complete it AND JUST DO IT! And have fun! And if you aren't having fun... try to fake it, maybe you'll have some by accident.
When your done, add a couple to the hat, and start again.

else go talk to your doctor about the effects of the drugs, and ask his advice.

Best of Luck!

Q: 16/F I don't know how to go about it, but I want to be more outgoing. Once I'm labeled as the "shy one" I can't move past it. How can I become my lovable self and accept hugs and whatnot because I'm totally sick of being distant and shady.

Being labeled the shy one is fine, i don't see anything wrong with it.
I LOVE shy girls, but then again I'm pretty shy myself :S and once unleashed... :D
Well, the only advice I can give you is laughter.
You don't have to become a comedian, but try to use your sense of humor, if you don't really think you have one, try to work on it.
Suppose you could check a couple of stand up shows, and see what kind of humor you like and learn from comedians.
But use the humor mostly to diffuse a situation... like initially, otherwise you'll end up the "funny one", unless you wouldn't mind that.

Goodluck, and send me a email (I DO like timid women)!
Hoji

Q: im a freshman in highschool and last year in eighth grade i got really close to these two guys rob and dan. theyre both really good friends and last year my feelings for them would be a roller coaster. i would like rob and then i would like dan, vice versa. well, this year rob never talks to me let alone even looks at me and it truely hurts. i feel like i did something wrong. lately ive been paying a lot of attention to dan, maybe thats why? i just dont understand whats going on and why he seems like hes acting so strange. plus he hooked up with one of my good friends for the first time. and i dont even like rob anymore, or atleast i dont think so. any comments/advice would be great :]

rob seems really mature for his age.
It is not fair to keep people on a line, and I really hope you never have to experience why I say it.
choose and take responsibility.

Q: 16/m

Sorry this might be long. Well. We'll just call this girl R, lol. She's really weird just like me and shes like my best friend n all that. I am really starting to like her. A lot. We stay up talking on weekends sometimes, and we never run out of things to talk about.

Problem is, she has a boyfriend. They've been going out for like a really really long time, and I wouldn't tell her I like her when she has a boyfriend. So I've been waiting. And nothing changes. I still like her.

But a couple nights ago she left me this really long message saying that she liked me as more than a friend. And she also wrote in it "I know i have a boyfriend and all that, which is why i'm having a really hard time liking you. nd i dont want anyone thinking im cheating on him or whatever because im really not the kind of person to do that sort of thing. And dont ask me why i like you because i dont even know. its just a huge puzzle to me. Anyway, I just had to tell you this because it was killing me and i had to get it off my chest. and im really afraid to send this but i know nothing will change if i dont so here it goes..." and i noticed she sent this really late at night.

and then after that she sent a message that said "omg. ignore that last message. i was like acting drunk. omfg please ignore it."

What do you think I should do...?

hehehe, devil you!

she is probably going to try to act a bit distant towards you.

do you like her enough to get beaten up by the boyfriend with the possibility that MAYBE she set you up?
maybe its her boyfriend who got jealous and sent it on her cellphone.
maybe she wont respond that way again.

thats pretty much the worst case scenarios friend.

keep the message to yourself, and then if i were you id take the chance. tell her to leave her boyfriend, before she cheats on him.

if the second paranoia shows true then show her the message.

1) choose
2) take responsibility
3) don't look back

best of luck!

Q: im 16/f and ive been thinkin about leaving home for months but now its got serious. things at home are really crap i hate it! ive tried to talk to my parents about it but they just say if your gona be that stupid then go live with your grandma. but where i live there is a place which helps young people who want to or have left home and its full of appartments and im thinking of moving there but because the law here (as far as i know) is that you need your parents consent otherwise the police will report you as missing and will get involvd, i dont htink my parents will giv me consent and i dont want to live here no more! theyre not violent theyr not abusive! they just dont show love towards me lik they do to my brother and sister. me and my father havent spoken nicely to each other in over 3 months and my mum hates me for that! DO you think its right to leave? or do you think im being selfish? and does anyone no the laws about leaving home at 16?? thanks

grownup thing to do would be try to make things better not worse, just leaving... worse on mum & dad.
crap situation you are in for sure.
know what, TRY talking to your dad nicely...
even your mum, try yo ease the tension in the house.
make a couple of jokes, do what ever you can.
if you can honesty look yourself in the mirror and say, i'd given my best for a couple months and no differance, go.

Q: i have a friend: hes 17.
im 15/f [just for refrence]
my friend went to rehab, stopped drinking and doing drugs.
started again at a party last week.
is back into bad things, i basicly told him to stop.
and then he decides to lie to me and say hes stopped and he has lied about numerous things in the past. today i told him i hated him.
but i dont really.
how can i fix this? what should i do?

truthfully, drugs can be fun... taken with GREAT moderation and serious fear of addiction.
In my opinion once...twice a year, at he beach on vacation, nothing hardcore.
if he is going overboard, tell him AND tell him you are stepping away, which is what you should do.
drugs hurt people, not because of the embarrassment, but because that person later dont know and dont care what he is doing to the people around him.

BTW lying about it is a bad sign.

take care.

Q: Its October 16 of 07. Well the names Stephen. the situation is that a very good friend of mine Aram was seeing this girl Brianna for 6 months. We all had worked together at a theatre and thats pretty much how we all met. Recently they broke up at around the end of of july and since then i have been hanging with Brianna a lot lately.

i was with her when they had problems in mid july and had started have feelings grow for her. They break up then about a month later when we hang out a lot she tells me that she has feelings for me. Well i tell her that i had feelings for this other girl Angela. I told Brianna that it was Angela but eventually told Brianna i also had feelings for her but she didn't know that it was stronger with her at the time. So we hang out more but i hold back because of the fat that i had to talk to Aram before doing anything and clearing that situation up.

Well countless times when Brianna and were together i held back and i feel that it was unfair to her because she also thouht that i wanted to be with Angela. Well after a little under three months she talking to Aram now and i still have feeling for her and i know that she has feelings for him. Well i want to talk to him about that.

I know that they still have feelings for each other and that she has feelings for me but i think that she would choose him. And i have talked to him about how i felt about her and he was glad that it was a guy that he knew but still he is a best friend and i know that hurt him. But i didn't do anything with her. I held back for Arams sake. What do i do now?

firstly choose.
secondly take it like a man.

you know you bud, would he be cool about it? or simply take it? would he let you know about it if you told him?

if you are under twenty id say leave the girl, go with your bud and try to pickup a couple of other chicks and have fun. you both get over her.

but remember the two rules at the top.

I'm glad not to be in your situation and simply give advice...
best of luck to you man.
remember, nothing in life that is worth it is easy.

Q: I'm 18 and just started college. Recently, my boyfriend and I had a horrible break-up. He knew that it shook me hard & he's still cocky. I love college and I have many friends. The problem is, he'll be coming to my school next semester. I can't help feeling that it's my territory he's invading. School is somewhere away from him and to get my mind off him. What am I supposed to do when he suddenly shows up? He'll be a constant reminder of heartache and I won't want to go to school anymore!

best defense is a good offense...
get a bigger boyfriend :D

seriously, try to get over him, try to go on a couple of dates, even if you ask a guy out.

you have a couple of months left to buff yourself emotionally, use it.

i have to say that if you ignore him, he is probably going to notice. best would be if you can face him like (or as if) he is a lesson learned...

i HATE when girls do that to me :S

my best to you!

Q: I am a semi-White collar/blue collar type and women my age shun me like I was the plague. I have tried everything and I am about to "throw in the towel" and remain single for life. I tried Internet dating and that was a flop, I even tried flirting with unmarried (and unattached) women where I live but that only turns them off. It's like I have a dark cloud above my head that says "doom". I would make a perfect husband but no woman seems to be willing to take me up on that offer. I can take the truth. If I'm doomed, then I understand. (Male, 32, Anglo-German, writer and Christian and political activist)

that dark cloud above your head that says "doom"... i see it.
you will need to loosen up a bit.

if you are willing to take a bit of a leap, give me a email, i might have something that MIGHT help you if you are willing to help yourself.
If you don't trust me, make up a email at yahoo or someting.

It really helped me a great deal.

ck_madrynn@yahoo.co.uk

Q: THIS IS A QUESTION FOR A GUY'S OPINION ONLY

Where do guys like the girls to put their hands when they are making out?
Please don't say penis =P

Thanks in advance!

a nice tender kiss, she has her forearms resting on mine.

a sexy kiss, oh everywhere and anywhere.
try to read the kiss as you touch.
grope a little, stroke a little.
don't overdo the good spots, keep it to build a type of rhythm. almost like making music :P

but best of all, if she pulls away and she looks like she enjoyed it... u know stroke the ego a bit.

hope this helps and damn i could use a good kiss right about now :P

Q: what is LOVE?

1)IN LOVE (funky feeling)
Chemicals in you're brain by which mother nature is telling you that there are room for more people on earth (even if its not true).
2)LOVE (commitment)
Spending time on/for someone when you would rather spend it on something else.

just my view, could be wrong.

Q: hi. 15/m
i've known this girl for about a month. i met her at a football game. she's really pretty and just all around great. great personality, etc...all the good stuff.
so last night, at another football game, i asked her out. we'd been talking over aim/facebook since we'd met and i really like her.
well after i asked her she thinks for a minute, then turns to me and says "i need to think about it". then i give her a hug because i had to leave.
well i got a message from her this morning after i got home from saturday varsity swim practice that said "i really really really like you but i don't really want a boyfriend right now...not saying i wont in a couple weeks or months but i dont want it to be awkward around us..." etc.
well we've been talking litterally like....all day. and so i think what i'm trying to ask is do i try again in a couple weeks or what? i don't really have much experience with girls...i've only ever had one girlfriend and so idk if i should try again later or if i should look for someone else...

thanks a bunch
G.M.

having a girl tell you anything except a flat out NO! is great. You put the thought in her head and she said maybe.
if you are friends now, why ask her out on a date? hanging out with her is perfect, she gets to know you and visa versa.
tell her to join you for whatever you like doing, if she has something to say, tell her, "as friends of course".
don't act defensive, nothing wrong with a guy trying his luck.
But right now, hang around her and have fun with her.

Best of luck.

Q: im 17/f with no confidence at all to do anything..i wanna experience things..live..party it up..i mean im gonna be a senior. The thing is..i dont know how to boost my self confidence to go out and meet ppl..im not ugly..not fat..i just dont have good self esteem..i wanna LIVE..but where do i start?

Well, when you are in a situation where you feel inferior, try to forget yourself and what other people think of you. Think about it, some of the best times you've ever had, you weren't thinking, ooo me this and ooo me that, he/she thinks that exc...
You are not superior/inferior to anybody..
You need to control your emotions else they (and possibly some really twisted people) are going to control you.
Do this exercise:
Think of a time where you were really comfortable, then tap your pinky and thumb together 3 times.
Do this over a couple of weeks/months until, by doing the tapping, you can get yourself into that emotional state.
It could be handy when you feel vulnerable.
then later, think of other states you would like to recall on demand and practice it with different motions, like scratching you ear or whatever.
Good luck

Q:

i have an amazing boyfriend, he does everything you could emagine a wonderful boyfriend doing. we've been together 5 and a half months now. i used to be so happy with everything, but he's 3 years older than me. i'm only 15 and everything is so serious now. he also get VERY jealous, and i'm not allowed to talk to other guy, text any other guys or anything, i barely even get to hang out with my friends. i really love my boyfriend but i keep thinking do i really want to be so serious, i'm only 15 i need freedom.

i need some advice on what to do here?

tell him the things you said in tis post... though don't use "serious" at all. make him understand why you like him, work his ego a bit.

Q: hey . well im fourteen years old and my man is 18 . i like him alot and he keeps trying to have sex wiht me . but i say no. im fixing to move to another city and so is he. i really like him but i dont know if i should stay with him. i mean this is the first boyfriend my mom has let me keep. he doesnt pressure me to do anything . if i say no he understands. but yet my older cuzin always tells me that hes not good enough for him. but shes always going out with guys who are not even good for her either. What should i do about my boyfriend? should i stay with him or jux give us some time? byu the way we have been together for three months. but we have known eachother for a year.

bugger what your cousin says about boys till she has it figured it out for herself, i'm not saying just sleep with the guy, but don't let anyone tell you about love or how it is supposed to be, its your OWN.
but if you ask me, wait till you are older with sex anyway. when you have found each other, give time.

my best

Q: your going to have to work with me here because this gets complicated!!

there is this girl who starting giving out to be yesterday cause she thinks im trying to break up her and her boyfriend? i know the guy pretty well but havent ever siad anything to him that would imply im trying to break them up. i asked him stuff like "why did you like her" but it was out of curiousity and nothing else?

i send the girl a girl message by accident that was meant to go to the boy about how he liked her but i sent it to her and she thought we were talking about a different girl so she went andgot with some other lad.
they got back together but now she thinks i did it all just to break them up
what should i do to clear my name? she is goin around sayin stuff about me and none of it is true

relationships seems to be complicated, as some rule God conspired against us all, which seems to make most of us kinda paranoid.
If you did have such a open friendship with the boyfriend... he should have surely known, wouldn't he? and perhaps cleared it up with her himself?
I won't pretend to know the direct answer to your question,
but ye, open communication with her would at this stage seem to be the best option, in front of him and her.
but a question you should be able to answer her is... what was the interest in any case?
and you SHOULD answer that truthfully.
good luck

Q: I have this friend, lets call her E. She is currently commited to this guy. he is older then she is and away in college. we both are just in high school. she has an amazing personality and i almost knew that i had real feelings for her once i met her. i know she has some feelings for me too. problem is she is still commited in her own mind, to the guy in college. it cause's her so much conflict, and rightfully so. i dont want her to have to deal with this, and i would be okay if she went to her old boyfriend. but i am notn really okay with this, because i really like her. and i kno that we would work out together. I can't control her emotions nor do i want to. I also dont want to be as selfish as i am. it's rude and not who i wish to be. But it hurts to realize that i may lose our relationship.

any advice on how to settle my troubles. either get over her (would rather not), or more preferably help her choose. and choose me. i really like her, and know we would work out. but how do i show her that too.

don't talk to her about it.
spend time with her, talk, play, tease her...just have fun with her.
then instead of talking about your feelings, when you see the right moment, kiss her... though, in the current predicament, give a little time, a week or two, no pressure.
If it doesn't work out, best way to get over a girl is to get another one... or thats what i heard.

Q: thanks for advice but what can i do when i am around him? and hes Lds so he would never do bad things hes a really great guy.any advice.

if and when he tries to make a move, just say no thanks. say "I think you're a great guy...but I don't feel that way about you", just tell it like it is.
Else, don't treat him differently, just be yourself around him.

Q: 16/F
105 lbs/5'4"

I recently came out to my family that I've lost 10 pounds in the last two weeks due to not eating and throwing up when I do eat. Now my parents want to send me to an in-patient facility for rehabilitation. I'm really really scared/angry because I think that I can beat this or figure it out myself with a little help from my family...I'm not even that underweight. I feel like this whole thing is ridiculous and I shouldn't have tol them about it. What should I do? I need to convince them otherwise very soon...

they are scared you are becoming bulimic,
don't do the not eating and throwing up thing and they will chill out.
problem with what you are doing is that it can very VERY easily become a very bad habit,
start showing interest in losing weight in other ways, even if asking the family for advice.
that should start putting them at ease, actually trying it, totally at ease.
And by the way, a 100lbs (odd) is a good , a little meat on a girl is lovely.
a skeleton on the other hand is kinda hard and too uncomfortable too hold... :)