Anyone need advice or just to chat i am hoping to be able to help as many people as possibe. I am also on here to look for advice--hey we all need it! So if you need advice you can get to me as you prefer. Thank you and hope all is well
E-mail: Kam98@rcn.com
Gender: Female
Location: PA
Age: 27
AIM: sxeys4
Yahoo: sweeteyez4u2c@yahoo.com
Member Since: November 1, 2005
Answers: 157
Last Update: December 25, 2005
Visitors: 8344
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Ever since my bf moved to another state for a job I feel as though a weight has been lifted. I think he was upset with me because the last time we talked over the phone before he moved I sounded so happy. Part of the reason for my happiness is that I had just started a new job with a really cool company after years of unemployment and dissatisfaction. Well my self esteem and confidence has totally gone up and when I told my bf how happy I was with things he didnt sound happy at all for me. I also think he was mad at me because he said he was thinking of stopping into the store before he left but I didnt sound to thrilled to see him. Well it's been a month since we've talked or emailed and you know what, I don't even miss him!!
My question is : Why do you think he was mad that I sounded so happy? Wouldnt he want me to be happy? And also I feel a little guilty for being glad that he is gone.
Does anyone have any insight? (link)
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It seems to me that you are more confident with your self and you are realizing he is not the one for you--kind of like when you were unemployed and disatisfied he was there b/c you had nothing else. Now you are doing good for yourself and moving forward and you may love him but he is not want you want. He should be happy for you but he was proboly upset that you werent hasppy this way when he was home dont sweat it you do you and keep the confidence. It has been a month already and maybe you should tell him you are going your separate way b/c the feelings are not their for him. You dont want to drag him on longer.Good luck
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I am married, and want to know that during pregnancy when we stop sex, or during pregnancy when it is not safe to intercourse.
I also want to know that in 12th week of pregnancy is intercourse is suitable?
Please give more details about intercourse during pregnancy.
asif_jah@hotmail.com
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sex is safe while preganat-it is actually better! people actually have sex towards the end of a preganacy to help the dilation along. So you can have it whenever-it will not hurt the baby.
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Hi, I would REALLY apprecaite some advice :) OK, my partner (male 32) is driving me (female 26) up the wall! We have a 6 month old baby. My parner works, I am at home alone with the baby all day. He has this really annoying habit where he get's home, sits on his lap top and then only goes to bed at about 5am! His alarm goes off at least 6 times before he gets up for work (obviously making him late!) and then he has to stay at work late to make up the time. By the the time he gets home from work, I am so wound up that we argue! I have tried to comprimise by designating "laptop evenings" but when we do this, it lasts for a few days and then we are back at square one. The worst of it is, that he he has difficulty with "demands". He sees everything as a demand and then feels that he must rebel! This makes him worse. Please can you give me some practical advice to get him to sleep earleir and to wake up on time for work. We are due to get married in Jan and I feel that this is a real reason for me to call it all off :( Thanks :) (link)
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i would definetly call the weddin goff. If you look at the whole picture he is not willing to do what it takes to be responible let alone make you happy. Im sure you love him but do you really want to live the rest of your life like this? My ex-fiance was the same way but he did what he could to not be on the computer but then it started all over again--then he left me and found someone from the computer. You said what you could to him no its up to him to make this better. I would tell him you are going to call the wedding off if he doesnt change b/c you dont want to live like this. MAybe he will listen and realize you have feelings too and you are serious. good luck
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ok i have a little problem with my family i mean i love them and all its just....they are to much......my brother is way to into himself and never does anything around the house i feel like im his mother and my sister is such a brat i feel like grabing her sometimes and throwing her out the window......they both drive me nuts.......i barely ever see my da my mom just left yesterday to another country for a month (she has her reasons) so its more difficult around the house my sister has been crying about her leaving before she even left (i think she just wants attenion) my brother thinks he is the boss and he is only 3 years older (we r both in high school) i dont know what to do i just cant take it any more............ (link)
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I think you need to stay to yourself and maybe have your space from them all. You dont want to get to the point where things get real bad and fights start breaking out. So your brother is all into himself--what man isnt-lol we have to ignore them and let them think what they want about themselves-we know the truth-lol-as for your sister i take it she is younger--she wants attention yes and she probobly looks up to you and wants to not feel so lonely-just talk to her and let her know you love her but you need some spcae and time to yourself. good luck hope i could help
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Ok well i like this kid a year older than me A LOT the problem is he has a gf well one weekend he begged me to come over but i couldnt now he wants me over this weekend well I know his gf and im not a slut so the best choice is to stay home right ? (link)
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There is nothing wrong with having guy friends and hanging out with them-but his g/f should know that your there and he shouldnot hide it from her or even try to be with you--if you feel this is why he is asking you to come over then yes i would stay home-the decision is yours nly you know the reason he wants you there and also keep in mind that if you do go over there rumors could start that didnt even happen and you will look bad. there is a lot to consider here good luck
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I took one of my friends to play tennis and he wasnt very good. But the thing that really got to me was that he kept critizing me and telling me what a bad player I WAS!!
I told him that I was just learning to play and was taking lessons. Then he said "what kind of lessons are you taking" and that I was "holding the racket all wrong".
He also said my stamina wasnt very good. What a jerk!! I was nice enough to drive him up to the court and be patient with him even though he was terrible. I may not be a pro but I was certainly better then him.
Well I havent asked him to play since then but he has been asking me if I want to play again.. Should I tell him the truth that I just don't want to play because of how he made me feel?
He also insulted me by saying he bought his wife a tennis racket and that she is "at my level". And I know that is an insult because she isn't athletic at all.
What should I do? And do I have a right to be upset? (link)
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you have a right to be upset and yes i woild speak your mind to this person just let him know exactly how he made you feel and maybe after you tell him and he still wants to play then give him one more shit-he may not have realized how he was treating you and how it made you feel. If you dont open your mouth it will continue to happen so yes speak your mind girl
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okay i have cut myself in the past and kinda still do...i am anorexic and get upset easily...when my mom found out i was cutting she said "Dont be a stupid f***"...and i asked to see a therapist and she said i dont need to..she jus doesnt understand...i dont know what to do...i am so anorexic ive lost my period and i am starting to cut again ((along with suicide poems)) and i obviously cant ask her...school counselours dont work..i've tried..please help! (link)
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Is there anyone else in your family to turn to? f your mom wont help you hafve you ever tried to go to a hospital and admit yourself-tell them your mom wont help you and they will help with with your issues and also find out why your mom is neglecting you and what you need and ask for especially when it is this serious. Please let me know if you need anything sweeety-life is already too short you need to live it to the fullest and have fun.
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16/f. Well my boyfriend and I have gone out for about 7 months, and we were good friends before that, and we have a wonderful relationship. We started fooling around about a month ago, but we're not going to have sex, at least not for a long time because we're not ready. I discussed this with him and (separately) with my mom, because I told her I'd always tell her if I was becoming more intimate in a relationship, and she was fine with it. Well, the other night my boyfriend dropped me off at my house and we were both extremely tired and we fell asleep on my bed, we didn't do anything at all. And my parents came home and flipped out, called his parents, now he's not allowed to see me for a very long time, etc...
And my mom says she doesn't trust me and she thinks we've been having sex. She fully knows my views on this and both my boyfriend and I are very ambitious academically and would not do anything that might jeopardize our education or futures. But there is mutual trust and understanding in this relationship, and I thought there was between my mom and I, and I'm very confused. Does anyone have any advice?
Sorry this is so long. Thanks. (link)
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you should talk to both your parents and the way you explained it in here is very mature and responsible. They should know this and see it and realize it is not what you did. you have a good head on your shoulders keep it up.do what you can to let your mom know your innocent
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Well I have a best friend and we haven't spent time together totally for 3 to 4 weeks. She and I have been busy as heck. Twice she spent the night over this over girl's house. She calls her, her best friend too. But she's told me that I’m number one. Well now I’m starting to feel left out because I also know her other best friend and we get along well. I just can't stand them being together hanging out and I’m never invited like when the other girl invited my best friend, Kay, to sleep over. She doesn't even call me that much anymore. I remember like in the beginning of the year that the other girl, eliz, was not in the picture and now she's treating her as she's been there for her like I have and SHE HASN'T! She's now including her in everything of her thoughts. I feel like if she had to choose between me and eliz needed to be helped up off the edge of a cliff she would grab me, but after talk about eliz the whole time. We also go to different schools like I go to high school and they go to junior high. Kay even cried when eliz needed to talk to me and didn't want to talk to Kay secretly. I was pissed on how she cried over her and I thought would she do the same to me. When they recently had a sleepover last Friday and she was showing me pictures of the sleepover and she had a picture of them together with the word "best friends" at the top. I felt my heart break that moment. That sleepover was for a "project" which they just played around the whole time though. I barely see Kay anymore and we live so close like 5 seconds from each other's house that I can see in her windows. But she sees eliz 24/7 though. She's also about to go on a cruise for a week and I won't see her than. I wanted to spend this time with her. I'm wondering if she even cares about me anymore really. My friendship love for her is fading. She's even keeping secrets from me like letting that eliz girl know before me and she promised she wouldn't do that in the beginning. She's acting different too and I don't like it. She tells me I’m totally #1, but the way she's been equaling me to this eliz chick that thought sounds more and more false to me. I've known her for 3 years and she's known her for 1 and a half! She treats me like she would treat her. I'm not included on any that they do and I hate that. Also my other friends when we get together I try to get Kay to go quick. She didn’t even attempt to have me come along. I don’t know what to do about this. Am I being unreasonable or totally fair and have a right to be a little ticked? Please help!! (link)
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ok that was really long but to sum this up is maybe you sghould talk to her and let her know how you feel andmaybe she will talk to this other girl and they can come up with something where you are invited. She should not push you off for someone else but when something is new people tend to forget about the other things that mean the most to them. Tell her how you feel and if she is a true friend she will listen to you and hopefully realize what is going on. good luck
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I know that when in a relationship 'Trust' is the key element. Well, I trust my boyfriend with everything I am, but that's not the problem. I know that he thinks other girls are pretty and that he looks at other girls like that upsets me. I know, I know. I probably sound really immature, but I know that ever since I've been dating him I don't really look at guys that way anymore because I don't need to look- I have him. I haven't got upset over this, but I can't help but think he's checking girls out while he out with me. Any advice? (link)
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Girl men will be men. My ex did the same crap to me and i hated it but it got to the point where i got insecure b/c his whole head would turn. Its one thing to look but its another thing to stare. Its one thing to look its another thing to touch. Feel good about yourself and know that he is with you and your better than that. Never let his looking affect you in anyway. I know this b/c it affected me and my ex-iknowexactly how u feel. If you need anything let me know or IM me on aol or yahoo and i will help you
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I have been goin out with my boyfriend for justa few days now, but we have known each other for a couple of months now. Well, when I was talkin to him onthe internet today, I got a sudden urge to just be like "I love you". I'm the kind of person who, I have to know i really do love somebody before I say that, cause to me, it has alot of meaning. so, I didn't say it, but my question is,since I felt like I wantedto all the sudden, does that mean I am in love with him, or what?
I'll rate 5's for any helpful answers!!
thanks in advance!!
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I dont think it really means you love him-you are happy with him and he makes you feel good but you dont love him...yet. there is alot about a person you dont know and to be honest you never really know a person even when you think you do...Love takes time and i think you will truley know when you love him but right now he makes you happy and feel good. Dont rush the love quote he may back down or push away hope i coul dhelp
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my ex and i are best friends,he has girlfriend and me her dont like each other, but its like now im realizing i still love him but i couldn't ever imagine being more than just his friend, even though we you used to go out,my friends say i should tell him how i feel but i just dont kno has a girl that he loves dearly but i get this vibe that maybe its something he not telling me,so im trying to figure out if its love or friendship. so what should i do should i tell him how i feelor should i just let this friendship "be real"?i also want to have sex with him and i think he knows that but he doesnt want to hurt his girl and i told him what she dont know won't hurt her so what should i do? (link)
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It is cool that you ares till friends with your ex but there is a line you cannot cross. He does have a girlfriend and you know he loves her so dont step over that line-im sure you will always have feelings for him and maybe you should back off alittle bit and let him have his relationship with his girlfriend--you know he loves her but yet your trying to manipulate him to have sex with you--i think he would respect you more if you didnt let him know that-and who knows if you lay low he may realize he doesnt want his girlfriend and re knidle them feelings for you also
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How do I turn off background tasks on my computer? I'm using XP
Thanks (link)
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I am not sure of what your trying to do but control alt delete will take you to what tasks you have running. You dont want to delete anything in case it needs to be there. Give alittle more info on what you need
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i put a lot of thought into what's been happening in my life for the past few weeks...and i've concluded, there's no way to win... but see, that's the good part, right? now i can really move on from the whole best friend and his girlfriend deal...but why am i so sad all of a sudden? it's like i miss everything that happened but i don't get it...i hated it all... what's going on here? (link)
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You know youdid what you could and you know you ahve to let it go,thats why you are sad. Your giving up someothing you enjoy but its best for you and them,you rfeel like you did everything for nothing but once you get over the hump and see the other side you will be ok. I am going through it with my ex-i finally let him go after 2 months b/c i realized no matter what i did or said he wasnt going to listen. I am happy now b/c i know i tried everything anf he will one day realize he lost a good person and he is the one who will suffer and the same thing for your situation. I know you dont see it now but it will get better i know everyone told me the same thing and i now see it-life is nothing but humps and bumps but you have to do what you can to get past it. Your a good person and you will make new friends who will be true friends but in the meantime you have to "mourn" and thats why you are sad. keep your head up girl and if you need anything let me know
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okay, so i took your advice and here's what happened... his girlfriend got mad at him, told him that she wanted to break up...he got mad at me and said i needed to stay away from her. then i tried to make them understand by talking to them but they just got annoyed...hum, so now i'm really mad but i don't know why. it might have something to do with knowing that my best friend is desperate for love and she's manipulative...am i wrong? i don't know what to do anymore...everything i do just makes more people mad. like, i quit my job and everything...but what really sucks is my managers wouldn't let me quit...they told me they'd keep scheduling me to work and we could figure out what was going on...so yesterday i ended up working until 7. my best friend's girlfriend worked until 8. my best friend wanted his girlfriend to go to one of our school dances but it started at 7:30. so he asked me to switch shifts with her but i wouldn't because i had to go out and get some stuff for my chemistry project. (are you still with me? don't wanna confuse you too much...) she ended up telling the managers a big lie about how her parents are away and the only way she was getting home was if she left at 7. so the managers took my shift and switched it with her. as angry as i am, i can't really do anything. doesn't my life just suck? i figure if i could just get away from the two of them, i'd be okay. the bad part is all my friends are friends with my best friend and work with his girlfriend...what do i do now?
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First I would like to apologize for the wait. I have been off here for a couple days and i did not want to just give you a quick answer. It is normal she would get mad because another girl is putting her 2 sense into something--its ok you said your piece and he needs to at least respect that and if he cant or wont let him be he will realize it for himself.l It just shows that you are the mature one and they have growing up to do. You did what you thought was best and the right thing to do. Your a good person for caring and they will realize that one day. Dont beat your self up over it, If she is desperarte than she has issues not you.Lay low for awhile if it hurts. it will work itself out. As for work just concentrate on that you should never quit because of other people. your job is more impotant then anything. I am still with you,and as for your friend lieing eventually they will figure her out and she will not have a job if it gets real bad. but in the end you will still have your job. Just try to keep things on a work level and you do you--dont worry about anyone else and you will get where you need to be and succeedd. It seems to me that you are the only mature one here--everyone else needs to grow up alittle. Hope all is going better keep me inmformed and again i am sorry for the delay. I will try to get back to you quicker. ggod luck.
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my friend, chris, he is really good friends iwth a kid named austin, but whenever they are hanging out together, chris is always being an asshole.... what should i do, should i tell him that its bugging me? or should i just kinda let it go? (link)
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guys are always different when they are witht heir friends--they have to be "macho" but if it isaffecting the way you are feeling about the friendship you may want to approach the situation if it makes you uncorfortable to hang out with them--just let him know you feel "out of place" just let him know its not to be blown up just wanted to let him know how you feel. see how he takes it maybe he will change it up alittle-but remember guys will be guys and they do act different when they are around each other. If it reall ybothers you just talk to him if he is your friend he will listen. good luck
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How do i put a picture in the slot beside my profile? (link)
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I used photobucket.com and uploaded my picture on there and then posted it in the url on the profile settings page. If you need further assistance you can instant message me and i will help you.
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How do I put a picture in the square beside my profile? (link)
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go to photobucket .com find a picture you would like to upload and upload it on there then post it in the url on the profile setting page. if u need further assistance you can instant meassge me and i will help
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im in a new relationship. before we were going out..me and the guy have been friends for a year..we got reeeeally close. we have an awesome bond. thing is, things are shaky to him and hes unsure about everything. he wants it to work but hes just confused,feels cornered, wants to tone things down... i told him to stick with me and we will see..he will clear things up and in a little time he will see if he wants to stay together or not. he told me he cares about me and doesnt want to hurt me..our relationship is on shaky terms right now. i will do anything to make this work..my question to you is..what are some nonphysical things to say/do with him so we can build our relationship up? he said maybe hes just new with all this and thats all..but hes confused. so i basically have to be prepared for things to fall apart or to be ok..please help (link)
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Ok i am going to tell you the best thing to do and i only know this b/c i am going through it. There is not too much you can do non pshysically -i mean there is always communication and love to work on but he is already confused and feels cornered and i know you want things to work but he cannot see what he wants if he is with you. You will need to space from each other and he will find what he wants when he is alone. I know it sounds hard but my fiance left me for the 3rd time in october--he felt trapped confused and scared--and he could not be with me no more--so i was crushed and the first 2 times i let him go and he came back but the third timei let him go for good. If a man doesnt know what they want after the third time then they have some growing up to do. I dont know how old you guys are-but if he is already confused that means he needs time to think about what he wants. If he apart from you he will have his space and time to miss you not being with you and the clouds will clear but it wont happen if he is together. You dont want to ty to hard to make things work b/c he needs to do the same i tried and tired and it pushed my ex away. It takes 2 people to amke or break a relationship and if only one is trying the other one will only take that for granted and not realize what he ahs got until its gone. Just approach him and ask him if he needs time and space and that you love him and want things to work and if he needs time you will give thaty to him. dont let him knowyour waiting b/c then he will take all the time he wants b/c he knows you will be there no matter what. You cant be walking on egg shells to wait and see if he is going to clear his head or want to work things out just let him know you want things to work but you love him enough to give him his space and to work things out in his head. It does really suck i know this i lost my finace--but this time i let him go for good. Sorry it took me a little to get to you i was off here for 2 days but if you need anything please let me know i would like tohelp you through this for i know what your going through. Good luck and keep me posted,
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I am trying to get my picture in my advice column but all i have is a box with an X what do i need to do? (link)
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ok what i did was i found a picture i liked and put it on photobucket.com and uploaded it on there i then posted the url on the picture upload and it worked. It took me alittle bit to do it also but i finally got it if u need any further help you can instant message me and i will help you
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