Reesespieces022's advice column

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Q: I am a senior this year. I will be going to college next year. Here is my problem. I don't know whether to choose a Nursing major or an Art major. My parents really want me to go for nursing, but art is what I love. Plus, most artists don't make a whole lot of money. What should I do?

Go for what you love. your not gonna like your classes if your in them for your parents, and you won't want to do well if your not passionate about what your doing.

Q: sorry this is long.
okay. this girl, tegan, lives with my family. she's only been here 3 weeks and she's already like a sister to me. problem: she likes my boyfriend josh. she is always saying how awesome he is and how he is realy good looking and stuff. and today she was going on about how jealous she is. she keeps saying she wants a guy just like josh! i really really like him. i am not giving him up! i tried setting her up with another guy and for 3 days she was all 'dan this, dan that' and saying how much she likes him. but then she dumped him and is going on about josh again. i tried talking to her but she is all like 'i'm just mucking around' but i can tell she isn't.

HELP!

Just tell her that you absolutly agree. Josh is awesome and wonderful- which is exactly why you love having him as your boyfriend. Just tell that your happy she likes him, but it makes you uncomfterble when she talks about him so much. tell her that you totally trust her, and know she's not going to do anything with him, but that if she can help it, itd make you feel better if she didn't gush about him so much.

Q: I am a 17/m and i really like this girl. I have a plan to ask her out. The only problem is that it involves two weeks and Valentines day. The plan is to leave notes in her locker with no name just ending it the same way. Should i go for the two week plan or should i just ask her?

absolutely wait and ask her out on valentiens day : ) my exboyfriend asked me out last valentines day...i loved it : ) the notes in her locker is such a sweet idea, but maybe do it for a week instead of two. Make sure you tell one of her friends what your plan is so that if shes having any doubts about you liking her, or about you asking her out, they can discreetly assure her that she has nothing to worry about.

Q: (15/f) My friend totally didn't invite me to his 16th birthday party. It's actually a couple of us that weren't invited, we're all on his tennis team and we've known him since 7th grade when I showed him around the school, on his first day. We hung out a lot freshman year, not As much this year but still. I saw him everyday. nI actually went through a stage of liking the kid, and he liked me for awhile to. Basically, we've *my friends and I that weren't invited* laughed about it but it still hurts! How can we 'jokingly' approach him about it?

Go up to him and just be like...listen, im not mad, just a little hurt. whats the deal? even if your really mad, just play it off and be calm. your more likely to get an honest answer, rather than him just trying to defend himself. if he gives you a ligitimate, honest sounding answer, be the bigger person and tell him you understand, but that he might wanna consider some of his friends feelings next time he decides to just avoid the topic. if he gives you some bullshit answer, than tell him you really thought he was more considerate than that...and walk away. as long as you stay totally cool, you'll have a bigger effect on him than if you yell at him.

Q: can a girl get pregnant if i wore a condom and even pulled out before i cum? She is only 3 days late but im just being cautious.

if you wore a condom and pulled out, its not very likely that shes pregnant, but i guess there is always that little chance. i would give it a few days and see how late she is. if it gets up to a week or more, than she should go to the doctor or take a pregnancy test to see whats going on.

Q: i really like this guy but i have nothing to talk to him with on aim... i kno people say intrests but iv tried that!! what can i talk to him about

ask him questions...if you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be? whats your biggest fear? if you could see any three bands in concert who would you see? do you think girls or guys should make the first move? what are your top three cereals? is it easy to gain your trust? favorite quote from a movie? ...the conversation can go one of two ways. it can become very flirty and fun, or really deep and insightful, depending on the guys answers to your questions. either way...he'll have liked talking to you. : )

Q: everytime i leave my hair down if i brush it it gets all staticy. how can i stop ot from getting like that??? (i use conditioner)

this always happens in the winter...if your hair is staticy, rub a dryer sheet all over and throught your hair. it smells good and gets rid of the static.

Q: me and ryan* have been dating for about 6 months now. these past two weeks, it seems like he's been hitting me a lot lately. i mean, half the time we're joking.. but he's been kicking me.. we were walking down the hallway and i said something to him, a joke.. and he kicked me in the back of the leg.. i couldn't walk right the rest of the day.. he kicked my other leg yesterday before algebra ended.. and today, my friend jacki was over and he kicked me in the hip (very bony) so i started to cry and all. is he considered abusive ? what do i do ?

tell him this is bullshit that your not gonna put up with. absolutely no guy has the right to physically hurt you. if you've told him to stop and he continues to kick and hurt you, break up with him before things get worse.

Q: This is an odd situation. Just for a little background info, I have a boyfriend. I've been dating him for over a year. Valentine's day will be 15 months.
Okay, I just got the lead in the school musical, and I have a love interest (duh). My love interest is a guy half the girls in the choir have had a crush on (except me, lol). That isn't really the point, just a bit of background.
My problem is this: We rehearsed, and we ended up practicing a scene in which we kiss. I didn't feel bad about it yesterday, but today I feel like...awkward, and wrong, and like I was cheating on my boyfriend, but it wasn't me that consented to the kiss, it was my character. My boyfriend knows about the scene, but he doesn't know we actually kissed yet. I was gonna talk to him about it today but he didn't come to school.
The thing is, the director thinks stage kisses look fake, and refuses to use fake kisses. So it was real. But I feel soooo bad about it. I shouldn't, because I have no feelings for the guy, but I do.
Any advice for me?

you're acting : ) whether a kiss is real or fake, if you don't feel anything towards the guy, than you shouldn't feel guilty. i know you can't really help feeling bad, so why don't you talk to your boyfriend about it? tell him how bad you feel, and he will most likely tell you that he respects what your doing, and trusts you completely. Promise him the first kiss right after the show : )

Q: How lond does weed stay in your system. because iwant to apply for this job but there doing a drug test and i dont know when to take the application. i smoked yesterday.
thursday January 20, 2005

this kind of depends on the type of drug test they're doing. there are different tests they can use, and some can detect drug use farther back than others. i'd find out which test they'll be using before you take it.

Q: Well i've been dating my boyfriend for about 2 months. He has had sex before and I havent (15/f). For the past couple of days I have really been thinking if i want to do it or not. My boyfriend is perfect, but im kinda nervous about the whole thing. Dont get me wrong, I do want to have sex with him, but its only been to months and i think its kinda soon. I have been sort of leading him on, but i really thought about it today and im jsut not ready. What ways can i tell him that im sorry for leading him on but im just not ready yet?????
Please help

Completly stop leading him on. if he asks you about it, simply tell him that you don't feel ready. he should respect and understand that. if he doesn't ask about it, than your okay : )

Q: My mother and I got in a huge fight. I went over like $50 bucks on my cellphone bill, and she was sooo mad!!! So yeah we got in a fight, and now I'm not speaking to her at all. I don't want to apologize to her, because she called me stupid and stuff, I don't know how to apologize to her. Should I just not talk to her all night and then write her a note and leave it for her in the morning, or should I apologize to her tonight to her face? I'm overly confused. Please help me!!!

Don't talk to her tonight. You seem way to angry and pissed off to talk to her without starting to fight again- thats absolutly understandable, you just gotta give yourself time to blow off your steam. write her a note, just saying that you really are sorry you went over your cell phone bill, and you are totally willing to pay for it. that you are still upset because of the things that were said, and that you just wanna talk to her without getting defensive and without fighting. it'll show responsibility because your apologizing, but letting her knwo your still mad.

Q: There is this guy I like that he knows I like him.Today he was near me during the first 2 class periods and every time we look at each other we either smile or do small talk.I really like him and he sweet and so smart.Well today when we were going off to 7th period he was beside me and said "you want me to ask you something?" And i was like No then i went to class and I've been thinking bout it all days.I'm just wondering if he likes me then how can I approach him or what can I say?PLZ help and thank you!!!

Whenever your talking to him tomorrow, flirtily throw in a little, "you wanna ask me that question now?"...and see where it goes from there.

Q: ok i like this gurl and i want to tell her and this is my plan but i want to kno if its corny or not. ok i was gonna ask her to take a walk with me and then take her hands and b like "i really like u and i was wondering if u could see me as a b/f?" abd then also if she says yes wat am i sapposed to do and wat do i do if she says no?

that is one of the sweetest things i've ever heard. corny? a little bit, but as a huge fan of corny things myself, i have a feeling the girl will appreciate it. Try asking her first, "just out of curiosity, what do you think about me and you being more than friends?" if her answer tells you she likes you back, than go through with taking her hands and telling her you really like her. if she says no, than you can just brush it off as you really just asking out of curiosity.

Q: after i straighten my hair.. blowdry and straighten. its always staticy.. what can i do so it wont static to my face and hands ect.

I'm the friend who told pianogirl about the dryer sheets : ) and shes absolutely right...i know it sounds crazy but just rub a dryer sheet through and over your hair when its staticy. it works wonders, and smells good : )

Q: this is sherry, ive been looking for verses and i couldent find anything. i'll keep looking..your in my prayers!

thank you so much.

Q: So, I like using fresh oranges on my face. They keep it really clear and feeling fresh and new. But, I can't just go and pick an orange everyday to use on my face. So, I was wondering if anyone knows of any orange based face products hat I could use, and where I could get them? Thank you.

Try Origins- if you can find one in your mall, i'd go there and talk to them. They tend to have products with interesting ingredients. There is also an website- gloss.com, where i found a cleanser that includes orange extract. (One-Step Gentle Exfoliating Cleanser). look around, there are tons of face cleansers out there, and using oranges on your face sounds to me like a really good idea.

Q: I really think I love this guy.. but he doesn't go to my school and I haven't seen him in a year. I really miss him because I, deep down, have always loved him. I try to make plans, but he's always playin hockey. I REALLY need to see him.. what can I do?

P.S. =>more info: i'm 13 (so is he) im in 7th grade (so is he) he's totally hott, and sweet (so am i... ok i'm juss sweet, im like OK but he thinks im hott) and he lives near me (we're only one school district apart.

THANKS FOR YOUR TIME!

go see him! go with some friends to one of his hockey games. you hafta see if this guy is everything you remember.

Q: At school dances, I never dance. I know..you'll say "then why do you go?". I just go and hang out with my friends. It's actually pretty fun. But they dance sometimes, and I don't. I guess I'm just not much of a dancer. I think I'm self-conscious or just embarrassed because I think I can't dance...I'm not sure. I'm probably afraid of what people will think of me, like if I dance bad/can't dance right or something. I'm just nervous. I've never slow danced with anyone either. So my first time will be a little scary. Anyway, back to my question. What do you think I can do to get over this? I need help, because I want to be dancing and having more fun than I usually do at the next dance.

okay. dancing, well its not as complicated as it seems. i know it sounds corny, but practice at home. put on some music you love, and just move! i know that sounds dumb, but just do whatever feels right to the music. follow what you see your friends doing. you'll have a much better time at these dances if your up there moving, even if its the littlest bit. it'll eventually become natural. once it feels natural, thats when your fear will go away. *as for slow dancing, do not worry about that at all. put your hands around the guys neck, he'll put his around your waist, and just sway back and forth.

Q: Well, I have this friend, and it seems like every time she gets a boyfriend, she forgets about all of her friends. It drives me crazy b/c we're supposed to be like best friends but everytime she just meets a new guy and like...ditches all of us. And then she wont hang ot with us unless he can come and all she does is like make out in front of us with him. Im getting really annoyed with her but I dont know if i should say something or not...

absolutely say something to her. i know it seems like, how could she not realize you would be mad, but people get wrapped up in the rush of a new relationship. especially since this has happened repeatedly, she obviously doesn't realize what shes doing. decide on one person to talk to her. she'll respond much better to one good friend than a gang of people who shes just finding out have been mad at her together behind her back. just bring it up casually, let her know that it feels like her new boyfriends are always more important than her friends. tell her that more than being mad, your hurt. and that your not asking her not to have boyfriends, just to be aware of how shes treating the rest of her friends. expect her to be mad. expect her to start defending herself. don't fight her, you've made your point. its up to her what happens from there.

bio

Hey...im risa, known to some as Reeses : )
I love the feeling of knowing that something i said helped someone when they were feeling confused, upset, or just in need of hearing someone elses point of view. i know it sounds corny, but im always here if you ever just need someone to tell you your not crazy. : )

Because maybe...your gonna be the one that saves me.