GirlOfEmotions's advice column

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Q: lately i have been so stressed and worried about one of my classes. i used to force myself to study all day for 5 days in advance of a test (including saturday and sunday) so that i would get a "good grade". its gotten to the point where i see a therapist and take medication. my mom is concerned, so she is only letting me study 2 hours a day so that i wont be overstressed, and she said that if i dont do well on tests that itll be her fault. my question is, is it better to cry and panic all the time and get a good grade or to enjoy life and not study as much and get a lower grade?

getting a good grade by stressing yourself and 'not studying to get a lower grade' are equal because they are both not good. you shouldn't push yourself too hard by studying too much because that's just going to get you frustrated and frustration does not lead to success. you'll lose sleep and you'll most likely wont do so well on a test. but studying too little wont do you any good, or you'll be wasting your time reading information, and forgetting it the next day. just plan a schedule to study for 30 mins after school, and study another extra 30 minutes later that day to divide your studying hours. that way, you will both study a good amount of time, and will REMEMBER what you study. try it (;

Q: okay for the past...5 days i have been sick. and when im sick i normally lose my apitite(spelling?) and eat like nothing. Im much better now and today my mom made me a great lunch (i had no breakfast because i woke up so late) but i could hardly eat any of it. I felt really full after 2 bites. Is this bad? or is it just from being sick?

P.S 15/f if that makes a difference

it's normal to lose your apetite when you're sick. some people even have one meal a day because they really dont have the energy to eat. so it's not abnormal to to feel sick and nauseous when it comes to food during sickness.

Q: im 14/f my bf is 17. he is always talking about how he wants to marry me and how much he loves me. i love him. i know you will think im to young. im not to young to know love. alright. so he got me this necklace for christmas that has a heart on it that on the front our names are ingraved and on the back it says "7 or 8 more years..." theres a story behind it...but its about me and him getting married in 7 or 8 years. then for valentines day he got me a ring. he wants to get married in 4 or 5 years now.... and he calls me his wife. like when he intorduces me to his friends he callse me his wife. and even to his mom he says hes going to see his wife and stuff. and whenever i see a baby i want one of my own.... is that normal? to want to have his kid? me and him have never had sex or anything. were really jsut good kids in love. so is that bad/wrong/weird/normal?

it's very normal to dream the way you do. and he seems like a keeper. but you just have to realize that if your dreams to become a reality, you're going to miss out on a lot of things such as boy watching with friends at the beach and all that fun stuff. but i totally understand that when you say you love him, then you love him. that's really sweet of him to wait for so long for you. this can be true love, but you'll never know when it comes to love. it's a hard topic to understand. and your other questions? "is it bad/wrong/weird..?" not at all.

Q: Me and mum used to get along really well. Now i am getting moody i suppose and i am always fighting with her. I hate it because we always got along so well. But i am not just saying it is me, mum seems to be a bit rude to me sometimes and i get really upset. I want to talk to her about it but every time i try she tells me to stop being so sensitive and silly. please help i am not sure what to do and it is really getting to me.
Thanks in advance

relationships with parents are difficult, even if it means you two were the best of friends and got a long really well. it's pretty much both your responsibility for your guys' relationship right now, but it's not a fault either. just avoid any topic that would lead to another argument. just lay low for now and don't try any small talks or sensitive talking as of the moment. she'll realize how much your drifting away from her and how much you guys dont talk. im not saying to completely ignore her, but show her in some way that you're trying your best to avoid fights and want everything the way it used to be. good luck [;

Q: OK i think this guy that I have been bffs with forever likes me. I wicked like him too. Only problem is, i could be wrong cus like, im fat. Hes cute too. I guess my question is .. does weight matter to everyone. And im a really big tomboy, i dont wear cute preppy clothes like all of my friends because i dont like things w/ a tight fit, im like a DD. Just please help !

weight doesn't matter. unless it's an a-hole that likes anorexic skanks thats all skin and bones. just observe the things he does around you, does for you, and says to you. it'll be obvious if he likes you. and if you considering on changing your look, like the way you dress.. think about it before you do it. you don't have to dress the way other girls do and be another clone. it seems like that guy likes you because of who you are right now. changing yourself might make things different. (;

Q: my friends are constantly making me feel bad or blaming me for something. and i always end up feeling bad and apoligizing even tohugh half the time it isnt my fault...any advice?

be more assertive. the next time they blame you for something youre not a part of, dont back down and automatically say youre sorry. dont make yourself look weak and make everything youre fault, because it's not. the minute they discover you're assertive side, THEY'LL back down and trust me, they would never blame you for anything again. unless it really is your fault. haha. you can always ask "how is it my fault" and if they can't give you a decent answer, it`ll make them look stupid. hope it works out.

Q: I like this guy... and he likes me. yeah. makes sense. were like... together- but I just like.. LIKE LIKE him, but he's obsessed with me. He likes me more than i like him. is that bad? or.. well. he kinda just wants to get more involved right now more than i do. like... well. im just fine being simply 'together'. he wants to get into all of the LOVE life kind of deal. how do i deal with it?

Take it slow. and if he's a fast one, say you're not ready for it. because if you go for it and its really not what you want, you'll just end up in a bigger mess and hurt his feelings more by letting him find out LATER that you didnt have as much feelings as he had for you. 'love' takes time to grow. if u get into one fast, it`ll end sooner.

Q: I babysit my niece and nephew once a week and when I do they won't listen to a word I say what do I do?

Bribery always work with little ones. you can always bribe them to behave and say "if you behave, i'll .." you get the point. candy's always a good one.

Q: ok so could you get pregnant without having sex...like just having sexual intercourse with guys and idk "getting messy" i suppose is a good way to say it. me and some of my friends were talking about it. if anyone of you guys/gals know the answer to this. lemmie know!! thanks.

yu cannot get pregnant without having sex first. 'getting messy' wont get u pregnant unless sperm enters your body. k? [;

Q: Hey I have to write a research paper and I have no clue what to do it on! Does anyone have any good ideas, like who are some interseting people I could do it on, or something like that... Thanks

Stevie Wonder-you can talk about how he accomplished his dream and became a famous artist despite the fact that hes blind

Ray Charles-The same thing as Stevie Wonder

hellen Keller-got through life being both blind and deaf

Q: okay so i have longish dark brown hair, dark brown eyes, and an ovalish shaped face. i was thinking about getting side bangs when i get another hair cut but i don't know if they would look good on me. if you could tell me what shape faces, what hair colors, and what eye colors, side bangs generally look good on it would be really helpful for me to figure out if they would look good on me. I rate 5's. Thanks in advance!

side bangs would look good and cutting your hair a little longer than shoulder-length would really outline an oval-shaped face. (;

Q: what do you wear to go ice skating at like a ice rink?

Scarf, thick jacket, and MAYBE legwarmers under your pants/jeans or whatever you're wearing. Just wear what you'd wear on a snow day.. but don't overdress as if you're in some kind of blizzard? [;

Q: how do you dump a guy without hurting his feelings?

there's no such thing as a nice break-up. it depends on the guy. you can try telling him that you're not ready to be in a relationship at the moment. and dont forget to bring up the fact that he's the only guy in your heart and he'd be the guy you'd come back to when you're ready for one.

Q: What is a 3.7 GPA considered in the US?

Is it an A average or B average?

Thanks.

3.7 GPA is in the A range.

just keep in mind:
4.0 -- A
3.0 -- B
2.0 -- C
1.0 -- D

Q: ok i have been dating this guy for awhile now and i care for him alot but i dont think a relationship is what i want from him anymore.hes to CLINGY and SENSITIVE.he always wants to just talk to me or just hang out with me alone.he never wants to talk with me and my friends we always have to be alone.i noticed i never have time for my friends anymore and im always going to be late.i have already tried to break up with him twice but he just cried and i felt guilty so i took him back now ive had it and we got into a fight about my friends a couple days ago and now im just avoiding him because i know when i do talk to him hell cry...help me what do i do?!?!?1

it's because he's not use to the break up or it might even be his FIRST break up. but if you keep running back to him, he'll just get used to your returning constantly. If you won't be his first heartbreak, who will? maybe years later when he gets into another relationship break-up, hes going to be ridiculous and cry when someone dumps him.

Q: i'm a sophmore in high school and have been going out with my gf since september. we go to different schools but they are pretty close only like 20 minutes awayy. she said shae doesnt want me to talk to her friends from skool which is weird, cuz i actually introduced her to friends from my skool. her friends are never around or with us when we hang out but i've met them a few times. is it wrong for her to do that, tellm e i cant talk to her friends?

yes it's wrong and hypocritical of her to do that. but i think the reason is that he is afraid of losing you and thinks that you might find her friends attractive and all that. but she has to learn to trust you and know you wouldn't do that to her.. right? if you introduce her to your friends, it should be fair for her to introduce her friends to you.

Q: ohkay, so im like a reeeaalllly slow runner when it comes to ... running? i get 12 minutes on my miles and i dont know what im doing wrong. i weigh 110lbs. im not fat but not stickly skinny. can anyone tell me how i can run faster and make it easier for me to run without getting tired?

It doesn't matter how how much you way or your body figure. it depends on how much/which carbs, vitamins, and all those nutrients you consume. if you're healthy, you won't have any trouble breathing and you wont run out of breath as fast as an unhealthy person would. just adjust to a healthy eating plan.

Q: Does anyone know if the Invisalign works? I was thinking about getting Invisalign instead of braces...has anyone had any experience with it?

if your dentist doesn't recommend it, then it doesn't have as good as an outcome as the common-type braces.

Q: ok so I have this friend who is over weight. all of my freinds and I are as skinny as a rail. I'm sure it's hard for her but she doesn't show it. So, the other day her and I went to the mall and we saw these ah-dorable string bikinis. Here is the other thing my freinds and I are all 32 As and 34 As. We don't have big chest so we can wear any bathing suit we want and not look like we are "falling out". Well my freind is a 36 B and she always wears string bikinis. Summer is coming fast and I see people look at her at the pool. She seriously looks like she is falling out and she alwasy crosses her arms over her stomach until we get into the pool. I have talked to my mom about this before but it's embaressing to me and my other freinds. We are so comfortable about our shape and it's awkward a lot. Is there a way i can talk to my freind about getting a better bathing suit without her getting mad at me? It's hard for all of us.

one of the only ways to get her a better bathing suit is get one just like the one you want her to wear. you can point out a one piece bathing suit to her and say its really cute and you'd buy it for yourself. then u can suggest ALL of you can purchase the same kind of bathing suit. i know it'll be hard if you tell her straight up that she does not look good in that string bikini, so do it strategically (;

Q: I saw my bf at the mall with another guy kissing him! Not just kissing but making out! What should i do? Should i confront him?!
HELP me please!
Thank you soooo much

whaaat? your BOYFRIEND kissin another guy? just DUMP him. easy as that. i wouldnt kiss my boyfriend if his lips've been on another guy's mouth. i know regular couples always give each other a chance but you've seen what you saw and what you saw was the truth riight? what other explanation can be an exception to THAT?