Gender:
FemaleLocation:
USAAge:
28Member Since:
October 4, 2005Answers:
2093Last Update:
February 22, 2015Visitors:
129622Favorite Columnists
Dragonflymagic
karenR
DangerNerd
SilentOne
Xenolan
theymos
Erinn_the_bamf
advicenator_admin
Brandi_S
Adviceguy158
Nallie
more...
Main Categories:
Random Weirdos
Computers
Love Life
View All
about
I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
*happy
*employed
*married
*large extended family
*bisexual
*advanced college degree
*no kids (yet)
advice
ok well i think im ready to start doing sexual things..! like i dont really know how to explain it but....i am .. the only thing stopping me is i need 2 find a boyfriend..sooooo i guess my questions are: how can i let a boy no that i want to do things with him..??.. and like any comments..!! btw. 14/f
Look at this website and please rethink your decision.
http://www.coolnurse.com/sex.htm
You may be physically ready, but that's not all there is to it. Sex has an entire emotional dimension to it. You don't even have a boyfriend. Sex should be the last thing on your mind. What about having an emotionally beneficial relationship with a guy? Isn't that more important to you? Sex is meaningless without it. You will definitely regret having sex at a young age later in life if you do. I mean, what adult wants to think back and know that they had sex with a 14 year old for no reason? It's actually kind of sick. I know that's going to be hard for you to picture, being 14 yourself, but 14 year olds are still kids. Would you want to remember having sex with a little kid? No. So don't have sex until you are older.
You are not ready.
So me and my boyfriend have been dating for a year and a month and we've been sexually active for 7 months i think.. anyways we were casually having sex the other day and the condom broke.. it was the second condom but he ejaculated in the first one not the second but there was still some on his shaft he thinks.. anyways i took plan b(the morning/day after pill) and i was just wonder what experience you guys have had with it.. does it work well? and do you think i could be pregnant? all i've heard is that the m.a.p. works realllllly well! but i want to know your stories!
WittyUsernameHere is incorrect. Emergency contraception does not force a miscarriage. Abortion pills do that. Emergency contraception is contraception. It prevents egg and sperm from uniting in the first place. It won't work if you are already pregnant. It is far from foolproof either. That makes it sound like it's 100% effective! The only foolproof method is abstinence. Plan B is only about 90% effective. Sure, 90% sounds high, but think of it this way - 1 in 10 women will still become pregnant! So, yes, pregnancy isn't out of the realm of possibility, but it's unlikely that will become so since you did take it within 24 hours. There's more information about Plan B on the website below. Remember too, that even though you are experiencing no side effects now, Plan B can really screw up your cycle. Your next period may come very early or even late. It can make PMS more severe too. So, even if your next period isn't normal, don't start worrying about pregnancy right away. Good luck.
http://www.go2planb.com/ForConsumers/AboutPlanB/WhatisPlanB.aspx
i have seen my friends go on a web page to check each others stats? and to see how many hours played and stuff. what page is it?
It's Bungie!
http://www.bungie.net
http://login.live.com/login.srf?wa=wsignin1.0&rpsnv=10&ct=1193681457&rver=4.5.2130.0&wp=LBI&wreply=http:%2F%2Fwww.bungie.net&lc=1033&id=42917
It's free, but you have to register for it. Just use the e-mail address you used for your gamertag and it'll upload all of your stats in what's called a "Service Record". It does a lot more than just let you check people's stats too. I'm on it allll the time. :)
My boyfriend & I had sex on friday. Thing is, he didn't put on a condom at first for like maybe the first minute and then he put one on. We've had sex about 3 times before that this month, all with a condom. I have no way of getting the morning after pill because I'm 17 and all my friends that are 18 are all busy now. I know I shouldn't have waited till the last minute but I wasn't worried and now I am quite worried and panicking. Should I even bother taking it? You have to take two, one lets say I take now and the next pill 12 hours later... which would be after the timerange of the effectiveness of the pill anyway? What are the chances because I'm supposed to get my period at the end of this month?
Thanks so much.
There are a LOT of ways to get to a doctor over something as serious as this. There are people you can trust. So never ever say that you can't and please always do when necessary. Better to be a little embarrassed or inconvenience someone for a little while than get pregnant at age 17 right?
I know this answer is too late, but for the future, you don't have to be 18 to get a day after pill!!! Sure, you do if you try to buy it over the counter, but you can get it from a clinic or a doctor. It's very important that you do this when you need to. Any emergency room or health clinic should be able to help you. The reason for all of this is because morning after pills are kind of dangerous. They're full of a ton of hormones in order to keep you from getting pregnant and if you have an unhealthy heart they could give you a heart attack! If you're over 18, you're an adult and can decide whether to take that risk yourself without a doctor's opinion. If you are under 18, you just have to have a talk with a doctor and the doctor will ask you about your family's history of heart attacks and stuff. Then the doctor will let you purchase the pill. It's a hassle, but worth it if you are ever in this situation again! All that said, do not put yourself in this situation again. Your boyfriend obviously didn't take the responsibility to protect the two of you so you need to do that from now on. Never have sex with him until he has a condom on. Buy it yourself and put it on him yourself if necessary! Good luck. :)
i want to know if the birth control pills are more effective than morning after pill and how long it is effective for after you take it. Some people told me to take birth control pill AND morning after pill just in case as a back up.
Wow, don't do that! That's way too many hormones for your body, it'll really mess up your system. The morning after pill basically pumps your body up with a ton of hormones so as to keep you from getting pregnant. In other words, it's kind of bad for you. Only take it in an emergency, that's why it's called emergency contraception! If you are taking regular birth control pills, there is no need for the morning after pill, it would be silly to take it. If you want extra protection use a condom. Good luck! :)
18/f hes 24
i have been seeing my boyfriend for 4 months now. a few weeks ago i had a few friends over and we all drank. (this is the first time hes met any of them). ive told him about my friend jen , who is a slut and he was like grossed out by her. me, very very drunk made a bad decision and made out with jen and one thing lead to another and me her and my boy were in bed together. she went down on me and so did he. no one else did anything except for me going down on him. i am so ashamed about it and we never really talked about it ( because first he was mad/grossed out because he knew she was a slut and thought she was dirty) except for last night, we discussed it (like 1 month later).
he pretty much said he was mostly into it cuz i was in it and it was his first time doing anything like that. hes a guyy, he`d obv do it again so im worried. i told him it would never happen again expecially with one of my friends, and he was like okay we will have to find someone else haha jk. and i was offended. does he need another girl? what if he got feelings? i would Not be okay with seeing him even touch another girl and im just so nervous now. what can i do? he tells me he is fine with just me and he moslty enjoyed it because of me but im just so ashamed and worried. thanks=(
Everything's going to be fine. It's clear that he wasn't into it. Of course he liked it, but because of you, not of her. He liked the idea that you liked other girls. Whether you're bisexual or not, you certainly acted it and I think I can safely say that, yeah, you are. Even if you wouldn't ever date a girl or anything, you don't seem to have a problem with being sexual with one. There's nothing wrong with that. Anyways, the reason I know that he was into you and that what he is telling you is the truth is because he didn't do anything with her. He had every opportunity to. It would have made sense for him to. For him, it was more of a show than something he wanted. Like a porn movie. He's not going to get attached to a girl in a porno or have feelings for her or anything. He's not going to need porn to be sexual. It's not going to turn into a need or a want unless you do this with this girl all the time, which you won't. It was clearly something you wouldn't have done without alcohol. I think that making this into an issue of trust is a bad move. It'll push him away. Believe him, he really is telling the truth. If he was pushing you to do it again or trying to convince you that it was a good thing then you'd be in trouble. He's not doing that though. He's trying to lighten the situation by joking about it and trying to reassure you that it was okay that it happened by letting you know that he enjoyed it. Just take a deep breath and relax. You have nothing to worry about. Even if it does happen again, it'll still be okay as long as you talk to him about it afterwards like you did this time. :)
does anyone know a lot about this school? i have questions id like to inbox people about
In all probability, there aren't any active columnists on here that know anything about Johns Hopkins! The thing is though, that even if they did, they wouldn't know nearly as much as someone from the Admissions Office. Check out the website for the college (http://www.jhu.edu/) and give the Admissions Office a call (410-516-6025). If possible, visit the college. You'll learn more from visiting than anywhere. You'd be able to meet with people and get a tour from an actual student. Don't worry, everyone will be really nice and will be able to answer any and all questions you have correctly! Nobody's going to write down your name and no matter how silly you think your questions are, asking won't affect whether you're accepted or not. They're just normal people doing their jobs, don't worry about how you'll sound. Good luck. :)
I'm from the UK and I know in the US colleges focus quite a bit on what extracurricular activities you have. There's only one college I'm applying to in the US but it's my first choice so I'd really like to think I have a shot at this.
Problem is, my school doesn't offer extracurricular activities and this may be hard to belive but there's no after school activities available in my town (other than academic help which I don't need and sports which I'm not able to do due to health).
The college I'm applying to is an arts college but I'm going for fashion management and they mostly focus on your activites and personal statement, rather than grades.
I'm a sophomore right now and the only extracurricular I do is I play the drums. I've had a job since I was 13 and I'm going to continue working, I'm also looking for volunteer work & applying for an internship with a fashion company in New York this Summer (but the programme I'm applying for favours people with extracurricular activities too so I'm screwed haha.
What should I do!? I really need SOMETHING to put on my applications.
What you have sounds pretty good! Most kids in American schools don't do a ton of extracurriculars. Sure there are the handful that are involved in EVERYTHING, but the average student is involved in just one or two groups. You play the drums and do volunteer work. This may surprise you, but that's great! The college you're applying to will really like that. Really hype up the volunteer work. Community service is a big deal and puts you above other applicants, especially if you stress the importance of it and how great it makes you feel in your essay. Not only does the community service put you above and beyond your job counts as an extracurricular. Having a real job with real responsibilities is seen as better than being in a useless club. It really puts you over the edge. Your job will put you way above and beyond kids that didn't have jobs and were in a bunch of silly clubs. I wouldn't worry at all if I were you. You seem like a very well-rounded person and if I were reading applications for a internship program I'd definitely like your experience and want you! Being an international student helps too! What you need to do is realize that you have plenty of extracurriculars. Talk yourself up! Good luck. :)
Okay. How can I fix this?
About half a year ago, I bleached parts of my hair and dyed them unnatural colors. Then after dying them every month to a different color, I dyed everything a medium brown.
And then I didn't really like it so I went for something darker.
However, the middle of my hair all around is still that medium brown. That area will not take any more color.
Any products you recommend? D:
I don't think this is something you can take care of yourself. Make an appointment with a hair stylist and chill out with the dye! Your hair can only take so much. Hair is actually really fragile. Good luck. :)
I have only just started masturbating and i was just wondering if there were any good positions or places that are best ...like i first did it in the bath and it felf easy and i really want to have an orgasm but i don't no if you can get them when you masturbate...
so any info and masturbating would be good thanx
This website should help. Don't worry, it's clean. :)
http://www.coolnurse.com/masturbation_howto.htm
My boyfriend that I've been dating for a couple of months dips. He used to do it A LOT more than he does now and he says he's trying to stop (NOT for me, for him), but I don't see much progress.
I was doing some research and it says that one can of dip has the nicotine of 60 cigarettes, so I can only imagine how hard it is for him to quit. It doesn't bother me as much as it did in the beginning, but there's just one thing that I constantly think about.
I know there are horror stories for cigarettes, alcohol...all that after school special stuff...and I'm not a "goody-goody" by any means, but seeing videos and pictures and hearing stories about people developing mouth cancer or even getting parts of their jaw removed scares me to death. He's only 18 and he's been doing it for two years.
Here's my question: How can I help him quit? Every time I bring it up I feel like I'm nagging him. How can I just help him along in a subtle way that will actually work without sounding like a nag?
Yeah I know, I misread the question and you're not allowed to delete your answers anymore. I don't have the time to fix it right now, but I will later. Sorry about that! :)
Ok, now that I've learned how to read I'll give you a better answer. :)
I know what dip is, I'm not an idiot. What happened was, I thought that he was under 18, which would make it quite illegal. It's not THAT bad of a thing, but still illegal and at that age completely unacceptable. Turning him in would be a little extreme, but still would have been the best thing for him. That said, he's been doing it for 2 years so even if it isn't illegal anymore, he has been participating in illegal activity. That's a bad sign. He's legally an adult now, but he's still young and the fact that he's pretty deep into this is going to make it extremely hard for him to quit. I mean, it was illegal and he still did it, potential punishments and all. If that didn't stop him, not much will. Since he is 18, turning him in obviously isn't an option anymore. The biggest problem you're going to have is that there's no question he's addicted by now. An addiction is a serious, serious thing. Threatening the relationship would not necessarily be effective, but could be very effective. I don't personally know him so I can't decide that. It would be up to you. The reason why it would be okay to threaten the relationship, or take a break, is because of the addiction. He could very well have an addictive personality. He didn't have too many qualms about breaking the law. All that put together does not make a good partner. It's not like he murdered somebody, but breaking the law is breaking the law any way you look at it. It has to start somewhere and he could potentially get into more serious stuff. It's probably not likely that this would happen, but this is very good leverage for you in helping him quit. If he can quit dipping, that would show you that he's not those things, he was young, made a mistake, and got in over his head. You know him and know he's not a bad person, but making him prove it to you might just work. Taking a break from him would really put things in perspective for him. What is really important in his life to him? How far will he go to be with you? It wouldn't be that you'd be taking a break because you were upset with him or didn't want to be with him because he dipped, but to give him an incentive. When he quits, he can be with you, he can see you. It would be like a reward, not a punishment. You'd be taking a break from him to help him, not to hurt him or make him choose and he'd know this. If you two are close enough, I really think it will work. It'll be hard and it will hurt not being able to see him, but he will feel the same way and he's the one with the power to fix it. Make sense? As long as he knows you're not mad, that you love him no matter what, and that it's just a way to help him since it's what he wants too, it could be very effective. Support groups, therapy and such are obvious ideas. You could have come up with that yourself and probably did. It's not for everyone though and that's why I think you asked this question. You don't think that these things will help him. He may also be unwilling to go. It wouldn't hurt to try, though, of course. Again, you know him better than anybody on here. All we know is that he dips and has from age 16-18. Not a whole lot of info. In order to help somebody, you need to know them very well. You have lots of options and ideas now, pick what you think he will respond best to. Good luck! :)
I know this is not what you want to hear, but he needs a lot of help. The best way to help him quit is to turn him in. He needs to be punished and rehabilitated and he needs therapy. This isn't a small problem, it's a huge one that he can't handle on his own and it needs to be taken care of soon. Now, it would, of course, completely destroy your relationship with him if you just went and turned him in. Even though it's without question what he needs, you can try to get around it. Get him into some type of program. A support group or therapy, anything. It would be a good start and it could help him a lot. If he refuses, threaten the relationship. If he still refuses, end the relationship and threaten to turn him in. If he refuses again, turn him in. Sometimes you have to hurt people to help them. It sucks, but that's how it is. Life isn't always pretty. I hope it doesn't come to that and I hope he gets the help he needs. Good luck. :)
is 200 hours of volunteer hours a good amount?
Definitely! :)
Ok my Toshiba Windows Xp is getting really slow and so I want to defrag my computer does anyone know any sites that give free defrag software and works really good if you can I appreciate it.
Your computer should have come with it...go to "Start", "Programs", "Accessories", "System Tools", and "Disk Defragmenter" should be an option. I hope this works for you!
What can I do to make my Halloween party amazing and unforgettable? Details would be GREAT! Thank you :)
Have a sort of Clue game going on. Set up a crime scene and leave clues around your house. Make the clues lead to an killer and an accomplice. What makes it great is that the accomplice and killer are actual guests at your party and they have no idea. The best part about this is that people don't have to participate if they don't want to. It would just be an ongoing thing throughout the party that would entertain some a great deal and others wouldn't bother with it. You would announce it at the beginning of the party and people could do as they pleased with it. Even if nobody really gets into it, having a "crime scene" at a Halloween party is pretty cool. It makes for a good atmosphere. In all probability though, quite a few people will get into it and it'll get really competitive and really funny, especially if the person that "did it" ends up finding that out themselves before anybody else and has to try to cover everything up. Other than that, make sure you have lots of snacks and drinks and a backup plan in case what you do plan doesn't work out. A good backup plan would be horror movies, or even horror movie spoofs like Scary Movie. Good luck! :)
does it matter if you write the address neatly?
Sorry, but why wouldn't you just write it neatly anyway? Even if you have bad handwriting it's not like it's hard or it will hurt to take the time to write it nice. If your handwriting is so bad that you can't, you need help. Get a handwriting coach or something. I know someone that had to do this, it helped a lot. Anyway, a college isn't going to reject you because your handwriting is a little sloppy. That would be ridiculous. However, you're supposed to write addresses neatly anyway, for the Post Office. If they can't read it, it's not gonna get there. Just write neat. There's no reason to purposely write sloppy now that you've been thinking about it.
How old should i be to have it
In my opinion, 18, but there's a lot more involved than just being 18!
Check out this website: http://www.coolnurse.com/sex.htm
Now that it's fall, I am getting like really serious allergies. I use two Rx medicines for it (one for day, another for evening use), but when I get attacks of sneezing in the morning, neither of them work for at least 4 hrs, then they work for another 3 hrs, then stop. I am getting really embarrassed and annoyed that my allergy fits interrupt school, assemblies, hanging out, and even sleeping. I am kept awake by my sneezing for up to 5 hours past the time I go to bed. I get up very early, so this is a big problem. I get up at least 10 times per class at school, which lasts 1 hour a class. Blowing and rubbing my nose makes it red, raw and painful. Any helo please?
You may need your prescriptions adjusted. Prescription allergy medication is as good as it gets. There's no use in recommending any over-the-counter meds to you as they're quite inferior. Set up an appointment with your doctor. Give your doctor all the information you have given here and you'll probably get something stronger or better. Seeing a doctor is your best bet! Good luck! :)
17/F
I've been dating my boyfriend for about 10 months now, and i love him dearly. Nobody has ever cared about me like he has. We've hit our rough patches, but always manage to come back to each other. I trust him completely, and he trusts me. He goes to a private school and lives about 20 minutes from me. But this hasn't hindered much of the relationship.
However, at the beginning of our relationship i had met another guy from my own school, a year older. Since i met this kid (around december of last year) i've had a mini "crush" on him. We both showed quite the interest in each other. This year for some reason, it must have gotten back to him that i really had a little thing for him, and he is still interested in me but knows i have a boyfriend and respects that i'm off boundaries.
But now i'm crushed on the inside, but i know i shouldn't.. It's almost like when i think about this other kid, i feel like i'm single and i'm being rejected..
I love my boyfriend.. but this extra desire is driving me nuts and sometimes i feel really selfish and rude for even feeling these emotions...
how do i cope when i see this other boy everyday but my boyfriend isn't there to get my mind in line?
You can't help being attracted to someone. It's not something you can control. The thing is, your mind is in line! You haven't done anything about your feelings for him. That's all that matters. It's okay and natural to look at other guys. Pretending that you don't is silly. Control what you can control. Worrying about things that are out of your control will only frustrate you. As long as you keep your actions in line there is nothing, nothing, nothing for you to worry about here! Enjoy looking at attractive guys...I'll bet your boyfriend looks at attractive girls too. You chose each other though. As long as you are true to each other and are still attracted to each other, you're fine! Good luck. :)
i got kicked off aim, and it hasnt let me sign on to my sn. i can sign on to any other sn, but not the one i usually use. and ive tried doing it on my phone and on other computers, it doesnt work. i may have deleted it (when you sign in, i highlighted it and clicked delete) and when i tried to register to that sn again, it said it was taken. ive uninstalled aim and installed it again .. NOTHING is workinggg! please help!
Don't worry, you didn't delete anything. By pressing delete, it just deleted your sn from the list of sn's saved on your computer. Not a problem at all. As for not being able to sign in, just leave it be for awhile. Sometimes when you get kicked off and you try to sign on again too quickly, it won't let you sign on again at all for awhile. It's just the way it is. The more you try, the longer it's going to take. Just leave it be for a few hours. It should work then. Good luck. :)
I was recently diagnosed with Anorexia. I went to the doctor because I haven't been getting my period. It is most likely from my very low estrogen & other hormone levels. What do they do to fix this?? I think birth control was mentioned. If so, how does it work & what type would I get?? Before judging the type of person I am, I have to say that I never wanted to get this thin. It is a problem & I've been working extremely hard. Before I went to the doctor, I basically ate around 800-1200 calories a day, if that. Since my appointment, I've been eating 1500-1600 calories. I know I need to gain weight & I'm mentally struggling to do so. My blood pressure & heart rate is very low which can cause heart problems in the future. I do not want to be unhealthy, so I'm trying to do my best & gain a bit of weight back. It's going to be a struggle & I know that, but I need a few tips. First of all, I'm 5'7 and weigh around 114 lbs. I was thinking of starting to gain 6 lbs. I want to be around 120 lbs or so. The thing is, I'm not quite sure how to go about it. If I up my calorie intake, & after a few weeks I hit 120-125 lbs, how can I stay there?? I'm not ready to go past that yet. I'm afraid of just gaining more & more weight & having to stay my jean size. I would like staying in the same jeans. To maintain 120-125ish, do I reduce my calories by a certain amount?? If so, what amount?? I am forbidden to exercise right now because of my heart rate/blood pressure. They think it would cause more problems if i did & I would burn more calories & I need to gain, so the calories need to be without exercise. Also, if I do hit my goal weight, can I start exercising again?? I don't like junk food at all whatsoever. People think it's because of my eating disorder that I dislike it, but I truly dislike the taste of it & how it makes me feel after I eat it. What are some healthy options in gaining weight?? I want good, nutritious meals, not fatty foods. I want to still eat lots of fruits/veggies. Any ideas or opinions?? Thanks.
The safest and best way to go about this is to consult a doctor. Ask your doctor these questions. It's important that you do this the right way. Only a doctor will be able to tell you what's right for you. Anybody on here would only be able to give you something generic. What you need is a specific diet tailored just to your needs. Call your doctor and ask your doctor these questions or see a dietitian. I know I didn't answer your question, but I don't want you following what people tell you on here. It's just not a good idea. A doctor, and only a doctor, will be able to help you with these questions. You must have seen a doctor about this problem so it's not like you don't have one. Any time you have questions that will affect your health never trust what anybody says unless they are a professional. Good luck.