about


I really need to start taking my own advice.

advice

Ok well theres this guy Ive liked since July. He used to work at the store my sister started working at and thats how i knew him. We never really communicated I just liked him and I didnt know why. Over the months we started hanging out and he was AMAZING!!! He said he liked me too but needed some time to get over his ex who cheated on him. Well I went away on vaca. for about 2 weeks and when I came back we never really had time to see each other and to make long story short he went to jail and will be there for 12 years. How do I get over him??? My friends say I loved him and mabye I did but I know Im never going to see him again so how do i stop thinking about him? please help

There is a quote I pretty much
life by:
"The secret to life is to diminish
one worry and replace it with the next
worry"

It may sound silly to you but if
you think about it, what you need to
get over this boy is to find something
better to replace him in your mind.
Sure, he'll always be in your heart,
but you don't want to live life waiting
around for him.

First off, I'm not sure what he
did to go to jail, but if its something
like rape or abuse, you know he'll be
bad for you. However, just find a boy,
a friend, take up a new hobby, concentrate
more on school, or just find any thought
that might replace him.

It will take time to get over him.
It always does, you can let yourself
grieve if you need to, but other then
that jump back into your normal cycle of
living and go with it.

Good Luck

[view]

I am 14 years old, and I have never made out before. I always just wanted to wait until the moment is right. You`re probably thinking I`m really ugly or something, but I`m actually really pretty (not to sound conceited). Anyway, whenever a guy would lean in to make out with me before, I would always push him away or turn my head. Well, now I have a boyfriend and I really want to make out with him. So my question is, how? Does anyone have any tips to give me on how to make out?
Thank you VERY much!

Most people are probably
going to tell you to just go with
the flow and chill.
And you'll probably be upset with the
answer, I know I always was when I
asked these questions before my first time.
I did however find a website
(myjellybean.com) (Under the flirting
section)
And I read and reread all those tips.
But when I ended up making out, all
of those tips and ideas went out the
window and everything was up to me and him.

So yeah, it honestly is a
go-with-the-flow sort of deal.
To GET him to makeout with you
try this:

When he says something funny or in
a silent moment, lean your forhead against
his. Then look into his eyes, bite your lip,
and giggle. Then just tilt your head and
go for it. Works everytime, I promise. :)

Good Luck

[view]

for a couple months ive always felt fat because i have a big stomach but everyone says im thin. i started not eating breakfast or lunch and then maybe dinner sometimes but after i eat dinner i make myself throw it up. throwing it up only started recently but i feel better afterwards. If i talked to a school guidance consuloer would they tell my mom. What happens

Well you have Anorexia Nurvousa and Bulimia.
These are two very serious disorders that
can eventually result in death.
Therefore, if you consult a counseler they
will most likley report to your mom.

However, after your mom, the counseler,
and yourself have all three discussed the
issue you with probably be admitted into
the hospital for malnutrition check or
you will be sent to a therapist/rehabilation
center for treatment.

Good Luck

[view]

16/F

I used to be friends with this girl (ill call her T) Well T and I became best friends in like 8th grade and we were inseperable. We used to do everything together (movies, mall, sleepovers, parties) we could even finish eachothers sentences. When me and T hangout we have a really good time, but she has stabbed me in the back more then once. T was texting/calling my boyfriend when we were going out and then when we broke up she went out with him like 2 months later another time there was this guy i really liked and he liked me and she was jealous so she would tell him that i dont really like him and was telling him things to make him like her..he ended up going out with some other girl. She has also tried to get people who are my friends against me too and she loves to copy me like my clothes, hair, guys i like, etc.. Now were both in 11th grade and since school started we havent been talking about 5 or 6 months and truthfully i miss hanging out with her and being friends but i dont know how to even start up a conversation and tell her how i feel because i dont want her to think im crawling back or not want to be friends, i know she has not been a good friend in the past but idk what to do can anyone help?

I like Diamonds answer..
Go ahead, write her a note.
Mention all the good time you two
had and include a few specific details
(Big inside jokes, etc)
to remind her of your past friendship.
Explain how she hurt you in all
the situations.
But also, tell her you
miss the great times you two
had together. Loosing a best
friend is tough, I know this too.
I wrote a letter once to
the friend I lost and were
good friends once again.

Remember though, the process
could take a while, she might not
even answer your letter.
So if you see her in the hall,
stop to say hi.
Show her that you are truly
ready to work through this.

Good Luck

[view]

13/f

I am always stuck watching my baby brother. He just turned 11 months [today]. I get so freaking stressed out all of the time because of him. I realize that he is just a baby, but you have no idea on how much its breaking me down. I don't even get to hang out with my friends as much as I used to. He bangs on my laptop when I'm sitting on the couch and he even shut off my laptop by picking at my power button and shutting it off while I was typing a paper that took ONE HOUR TO TYPE. I mean, I realize that he's a baby, but he drives me insane. It's not easy when you're 13 years old and just want to enjoy being a teenager. I constantly have to take on responsibilities of a 20 year old by watching him.

I watch him Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. My mom is a waitress at the local restaurant so I watch my baby brother from 4 PM to 11 PM. That's 7 hours. I mean, my mom gives me money for watching him. But sometimes, it's not even about the money. It's just much emotional turmoil I'm going through. He needs constant attention. The only free time that I get to myself is when he's sleeping. I have to change his diaper 4 times a day. I have to feed him. Its like he's MY baby. We need the money [my mom sometimes works double shifts] for Argentina because we will be going for a month and my parents obviously won't be getting payed. Anyways, it's just like sometimes I feel like ripping my hair out and screaming at the top of my lungs because this is how much Viggo makes me crazy inside. I've tried to breath and not go crazy, but it's hard if you're stuck watching him for 7/8 hours a day. Even when my mom is here, there is always SOME way I have to watch him.

This is a harsh situation
for such a young girl to have to
deal with.

Now, I'd recommed (other then
talking to your mom) to see if you
could have a friend come over and
help you out, or even an older
friend (16, 17) that can
watch your baby brother while you
get your homework done and get some rest.
[You can either give them the money
your mom gives you or just let them know
theres no money to pay for their help
but return the favor in a different form]
IE: Helping them with something
when they might need it.

You are still just a kid,
and you do have a right to
time with your friends,
free time, and a life.
So my biggest recommendation
would be to see if you
could get sometime to help
out with the load for a litle bit.
A close relative could work
just great as well.

Good Luck

[view]

OKAY i need help..im thinking about dieing the tips of my hair black or purple or some color..but im not sure how it would look..or how to do it by myself/with moms help....soo could you maybe send me links with pics and derections on how to do it...thanks you

I agree with the Advicer before me,
get some semi-permanent dye first
just to make sure your like the look
and the color of the style.

Also, I'd recommed your mom
and maybe even a trusted friend helping
you this way the tips will all be
even. You don't want the dye to
come out all wavy at the bottom,
that make make it tacky.

My friend dyed her tips by
putting the dye in a cup
and mixing it with a bit of
conditioner and just letting
the ends of her hair soak
in the mixture. Draw a line with
vaseline or baby oil right
about the part where you want
the color to start on your hair.
This will keep the dye from
dying unwanted parts and
will result in a straighter
line. It worked
great for her!


Good Luck

[view]


When I shave my armpits, it usually gets red and irritated and theres sometimes a couple of hard bunps. I use the same shaving cream and razor that I use on my legs, and my legs come out fine. Why is this happening? What should I do different when I shave my armpits? Thanks 13/f

Sounds like you've got some pretty
sensitive skin. I've picked up a trick
thats really reduced the amount of
bumps I get in my underarms.

Make sure the area is really wet.
Then use soap (Dove, etc) and lather
up the area. Then use your razor and
shave DOWN first. Do this once or
twice then take your razor and shave
upward.

This should irritate the skin less
and leave you with a closer shave.

Good Luck

[view]

what do you think makes someone classy, sophisticated, or elegant?

what about their apperance or attitude makes them seem that way?

i want to be classy.

im talking jennifer aniston/kelly rowan classy.

so what do you guys think?

Yay, fun question time :D
I'm sorry to say but I'd have to
disagree with teenagedramaqueen's opinion.

In my opinion, classy is a personality
as well as an appearence. Posing nude for
the camera and smoking isn't considered
classy to say the least. Thats why I don't
believe Marilyn Monroe nor Audrey Hepburn
were classic role models. (Yes style role models though)

(Attitude)
To be classy is being polite and sweet.
Classy people do not talk badly about others
and they remain calm in harsh situations.
Also, they are soft-spoken and are rarely
extremley hyper. They smile alot and compliment
often without sucking up. Classy girls should
know rules of etiquette and how to behave.
Most classy women do not smoke, curse,
excessivley drink nor cause trouble. Apologize
when a mistake is made and always have
good manners (please&thankyou) Also, PDA
is a big no-no when striving to be classy.
You may kiss and such with your partner
but keep it between the two of you.


(Appearence)
Classy women stay in style but also
dress simple. Such as a fancy casual
(nice black pants, not too revealing top,
elegant jewlrey, matching shoes)
Casual dresses and handbags are also
elegant. Classy women don't over-do
it on make up. Natural is always better
in this case. So stick with
nude/pale colors that enhance your
features without darkening your face.
Mascara and light eyeliner is okay, as
well as lipstick/gloss, blush, and foundation.
But do not pile up the eyeliner and dark
eyeshadow. Nice jewlrey (diamonds, pearls)
are classy as well. Slim/slender is
also better in the classy case, as
well as good-fitting clothing. Make sure
you always look well prepared like
getting your eyebrows and nails done
regularly.

Good Luck

[view]

what does clear mascara do to your lashes? does it give black to it or what thanks

Clear mascara is used to enhance the look
of lashes without clumps, also to align
lashes correctly (ex. if the lashes are
sticking out funny for some reason)

Also, younger girls may wear clear
mascara if their parents don't want
them to wear a dark color.

From what I know, clear mascara
doesn't help your eyelashe's health.
It just enhances the look.

Good Luck

[view]

I'm not sure but I've been told I have OCD.
I know some things I do seem a bit odd but w/e. I'll give some examples so you can tell me what you think...
- My food cannot touch
- When I'm sitting down, people cannot touch my chair or table
- When I do my hair, it has to be perfect or I redo it
- My spelling has to be correct (caps)
- When I speak french, it has to be with a certain accent even though I'm not from the area where that accent is normal (compicated one)
- etc...
What do you think? What should I do about these things?

Honestly they just sound
like weird obsessions and ways
or even pickyness.
My friends all have problems like
these such as the radio dial has to
be on an even number.

OCD is more in the sense that
if you don't do the routine correctly
every day that something terrible
will happen.

I used to be OCD when I was younger.
I had to check every lock in my house
3 times each before I went to bed.
Then I'd wake up in the morning and I'd
have to touch each doorknob atleast
once or I thought someone might
die that day.

Also, I had to hug my mom until
it felt 'right' every morning before
school or I thought I might never
see her again. These rituals I had
took over my life until I broke down
from fear, stress, and mental exhaustion
from the worry of not perfectly
completing my rituals.

If you watch True Life: I have OCD
you might understand it to be more then
just pickyness. If you are really
that worried about it and it's taking
over your life, you can go to a doctor
for some help.
Otherwise, don't worry about it.

Good Luck

[view]

I have a problem with all the jeans i buy! in about 6 months time after i buy them, they start to rip at ususlly the crotch part. I cant keeping buying jeans over and over again. Am i over wearing them? What can i do to get rid of the problem?

-Thanks!

Ack, I hate this problem.
This always happens to me in the butt area.
=P

Okay so, I've started buying bigger jeans.
This helped a little bit, but they eventually
ripped again.

Try not washing them so much.
So instead of wearing them everyday and washing
them everynight, wear them two times in a row
(unless they get stained of course)
This will help the material to not
get worn down so much in the dryer.

If you're talking about Hollister jeans
I've noticed this problem ALOT.
I've had 8 pairs of jeans from there
and they've all ripped within 7 months.
I don't buy them anymore, the lack of
quality is not worth the high price.

Also, try buying thicker jeans.
And when you sit, I'm not sure if you
spread your legs far apart, but that could
also be the problem. It happened
to my friend, it just stretched the material
too much.

Good Luck

[view]

can you make a smoothie with the only fruit being strawberries? (It is the only fruit right now in my kitchen and Im CRAVING a smoothie of some kind.) what else do I put in the blender? Ice? Milk?

I have my own recipe, I love it.

-1-1.5 Cups of strawberries.
-Ice.
-Milk.
-Vanilla extract (not mandatory)
-Few scoops of vanilla ice cream.
-A bit of sugar.

Then blend!
Good Luck

[view]

My boyfriend and I have been going out for three months and have known eachother for like 2 years. The thing is, we still haven't kissed yet! How can I hint to him that it's ok to kiss me and he can? Cause I will not mind! He has had other g/fs in the past too.

Thanks a bunch!

This happened with my boyfriend.
I totally recommend you stepping up
and kissing him yourself, thats what I
had to do. Now, we can't keep our hands
off of each other.

When you two are sitting together
and just talking you can either;
A. Just lean in and kiss him.
B. Put your forehead up against his, then
just sorta look in to his eyes, then turn your
head to kiss him. This will give him a slight
heads up.

If your willing, just ask him.
Be like, "So why haven't you kissed me?"
I'm not exactly that type of person,
and I'm not sure if you are. But if you
are go for it.

You guy could just be a little
bit shy. I found out my boyfriend didn't
want to scare me off, because his cousin
told him moving too quickly could get
me to break up with him.
So something like that could be the case.

Good Luck

[view]

Okay, i liked your advice on skirts, i was wondering if you had any other advice for wearing clothes. Im kind've a tomboy so i like to wear baggy clothing (sometimes), i was also wondering for make-up what to wear i usually wear brown eyeliner, but i wanted to do something more, and as for my hair too, i wear it down all the time. I wanted to change up my looks for the new year and be more interesting haha.

Hi there :)
Okay this answer might be a little long.

For your clothes:

If you've got a great girly curves, show them off! You can stay true to your tomboy style
but also jazz it up a bit! Try fitted shirts.
They don't have to be from Hollister or Abercrombie, just buy shirts that YOU think
are cute, but also flatter your body.

For example:
If you have broad shoulders, stay away from
high collared shirts like polos and crew necks, instead go for v-cuts and ballet tops)

If you want to change things up, but keep
it edgy, go for patterns and layers! Plaid
is great when paired with a solid top, same
for bold stripes.

For pants, try darkwash jeans for a casual
look. Also, get more flattering jeans to your body as well. You can do this by simply buying
your size, and not bigger sizes. This will dramatically enhance the look of your legs just by getting the correct size.
Bermuda cut jeans would also
work, again for the slimming factor go for
the darker wash denim. If you are okay with
the size/shape of your legs, experiment with
different colors of denim until you find one
that you like best, or mix them all up!

Also, jackets and accessories can totally
make or break an outfit. I personally love
layering shirts then tying it all together
with a big, bold belt.
Big chunky jewlrey is also still in
as well as long necklaces.
Go for a tight necklace with a bold
color to easily add pizzaz to a
boring casual outfit. As for jackets,
fitted jackets (as apposed to hoodies) also
enhance the look if done right. I
personally love the color combo
of black, gold, and green. I wear a black
polo, a fitted olive green jacket over,
then I wear a gold belt where the bottom
of the jacket meets the shirt. Many people
have complimented me on this, maybe you
should try it with your own favorite color
combination.



Now onto makeup.
Your make up doesn't have to be the
same everyday, change things up. Fashion
is ever changing and you have to keep up!

You could do the smokey eye look by
applying dark eyeliner of your choice
and smudging it with a smudge brush then
finishing it off with mascara.

For a light and natural look, line
half of your bottom lid (either on the inner
lid or along the lashes)with eyeliner
(either black, brown, or deep gold) Then
apply a shadow (the color can depend on your
skin tone, I'll have some notes about that
at the bottom) right above your
top lash line, then slowy fade that
color out as you move up your lid. Once
again finish it up with mascara.

If your eyes are small, line
the inner lids (upper and lower) with
white eyeliner then go about whichever
makeup method you chose.

Foundation/base is not mandatory.
I personally don't like it because
it never helps me much and makes me
breakout more. If you like it, go for it.
Just be sure to fully blend in the color
all the way down to your neck to avoid
embarrasing lines.

Blush is great as well.
Do a color thats a tad bit darker then
your skin tone. Then dust the poweder over
your apples of your face. (The squishy
parts when you smile)

For your lips, if you have
braces I don't recommend lipstick or
a dark colored gloss. This can make your
mouth look very cheap and tacky.
If you do have braces, try a sheer
glossy color thats just a tad darker
then your natural lip color. Or
you can just go for a clear gloss.
Remember, always use chapstick.

Tip: if you think your nose is too
large, dust a powder darker then your
skin tone along the sides of the nose
to enhance the shadow effect. This will
make the nose appear smaller.

Now onto your hair.
Is it straight or wavey?
When you wear it down (if its straight)
try curling it with a 1" curling iron.
You could also do the beach look
by scrunching it.

You could also try a half up
look. Try curling the ends of your
hair under to create a whole new look.

Or if your hair is wavey,
invest in a flat iron to add
some spark into your hair.

Messy buns are cute if not
over done as well. I'm not sure
how much time you're willing to
spend on your hair so heres a
link to my favorite hair style sight.
(Just click on the Hair link on the left
hand side)
http://www.geocities.com/mka_wonderland/



SKIN TONES & COLORS:
Olive: go for greens and golds.
African American: you can pretty much pull off any color.
Pale: pinks and peaches.
Tan: deep greens, browns, and cream colors.


Now if you don't know how
to do any of the things I mentioned
just inbox me and I'll fill you in.
Good Luck :D

[view]

What is your opinion on black hair?do you think it ia boring and ugly?

I don't think its boring,
I don't think its ugly.

I think its overdone and a pathetic way
to make everyone believe you are "emo" or
"scene." Yeah I might sound rude for
assuming a label like that but its true.
Most people only dye their hair to be
"different from the crowd" when in reality
they just want to be like all the other
cool emo kids. So in that case, I don't like
pretty girls who just want to look dark
and depressed. There are plenty of other
way to do that.

However if black (or almost black) is
your natural hair color, work it!
I'm all for it if its not just
for attention.
If you want to lighten it up a bit
try highlights, I'm not sure exactly
what shade your hair is, so I won't
recommend highlight color options
without looking first. So just ask your
stylist what he/she thinks would work
best.

Good Luck

[view]

soo usually i go to bed around 1-3 am, then wake up between 7-7:30 for school. would it be ok to leave a tampon in during the night? i for sure always wake up in the mornings, and i put new ones in right before i go to sleep.

I read an article in a magazine about this.
A gnycologist said a tampon is "okay" safe
for up to 15 hours if you HAVE to.

She also said a tampon is COMPLETLEY safe for
up to 10 hours. So basicly, 10 hours is safest,
but if you have to its okay to leave it
in for up to 15 hours. I'm somewhat of
a germaphobe, so that doesn't exactly sound
clean to me of course.

But yes, wearing a tampon overnight is
totally safe. In fact 1/4 of girls wear their
tampons over night. Just be sure to put
a clean one in right before bed, then
take it out when you wake up.
Don't worry about it.

Good Luck

[view]

I have a question about what to wear with skirts. I am very new to this. I haven't worn a skirt by choice before. I was thinkin of wearing one to school for the first time, because my boyfriend has only seen me in pants since we have been dating haha (11 months) and i have decided to wear a skirt for him. My question now is what kind've shoes would you wear, like i find it weird to wear boots with a skirt or running shoes with a skirt, could ya help me out? Also any other advice for wearing skirts. Wow, im very embarassed... haha

Honestly, in my opinion I would
not recommend leggings. I'm probably one
of the only girls in my school who hasn't
worn leggings under a skirt. Its simply because
its over done. Also, if you're going to wear
a skirt, why cover up your legs?
Thats just pointless.


So, if you want to flash your boyfriend
and little leg, you have plently of foot options.
One would be a summery sandal, you could do plain or a cute pattern that coordinates with your outfit. You also have the option of sandals with the small heel on them.


You could also try ballet flats.
Any coordinating pattern or color would
work just fine. Kitten heels could also work.

Or you could do a fancy shoe
if you're planning on dressing up the
outfit. Pumps or wedges will do just fine.
Suede slingbacks are also really in right now.


[I'm assuming you're going for a denim mini?]
However if you're just going to school,
cute tennis shoes could easily work! Skirts
don't have to be totally girly. Try Pumas
or even Vans, (Don't do Nike type shoes, keep the tennis shoes cute and small) but if you do, don't wear a fancy blouse. If you're going for the sporty mini-skirt look, layer cute fitted tees (coordinating colors of course) with a funky necklace. That will totally pull the
edgy, skater in a mini-skirt look together.

Boots can be okay in skirts.
I'm not a fan of Uggs, once again
they aren't in style, they're just an
overdone trend from last year. So to stand
out in your school, you could try boots but
I wouldn't recommend Ugg styled boots.

Good Luck

[view]

Right on my lipline there is a realy small pimple sort of like a bump. You can't really notice it though. It is not in the corner of my lipline nor the middle but closer to the middle. I get it from time to time and i don't know what it is. I sometimes start to freak out and think its herpes. What can it be?

It could be one of two things:
[I highly doubt its herpes]

1. A cold sore. Cold sores can come across looking like whiteheads, or they can look like blisters. If the bump looks like a whitehead, don't pop it thinking its a pimple. Just put Carmex on it and it'll be gone within a day.

2. A pimple, as you said. Becarfule if it looks like a whitehead, it could very much so be a cold sore like I said above. If its a blackhead though, just put some acne spot treatment on it and leave it alone.

Good Luck

[view]

(my chest)

im super flat,its not even funny. how do you get bigger boobs, without getting plastic surgery and such. is there anything natural you can do?

and please don't say i should just accept myself, and live with it.

There really isn't anyway to enhance breast size without the help of a plastic surgeon (I'm sorry, I know thats not what you wanted to hear)

However, there are things that you can use to enhance your look. Try a push-up, padded, or even a waterbra to make you look fuller. There are pads you can buy to fill up your bra with to make you look larger as well. Try not to over-do it though, you want to look as natural as possible. So don't automaticly stuff until you're a D, just do it gradually.

Good Luck

[view]

im in 8th grade.
everybody has a fav. teacher in every grade. but the teacher i think is my fav. i thik i might be a lill obsessed over. i see her as a friend but still as a teacher i tell her almost everything, and sometimes she interested and nice to me and some other days she wont listen to me and tell me im annoying. and once she told me that if she looked at me for too long she would throw up. and im not ugly and she said it in front of the whole class.

i totally see her more as a friend or like an aunt or sumthing.
since she told me i was annoying and insulted should i just leave her alone and treat her like anyother teacher?? it will be like losing a friend thow.

Honestly, when a teacher says something like that to any of their students, an administrator at the school should be notified. Thats no way to talk to a student, its downright rude and not to mention mean. Teachers are supposed to help you, be your friend, not put you down, and tear you apart.

As for your relationship, after that mishap I would hang back a little bit. Just let her be the teacher, and you be the student. If she apologizes, then I guess you could explain to her that you find her more as an Aunt or an older friend then a teacher, and that you trusted her with what you tell her. Hopefully, she'll understand you somewhat look up to her, and that she's important to you, thus ruining any chances of the insulting again.

Try to keep yourself occupied with friends your own age for a bit. Maybe your teacher just wanted you to realize that she is your teacher, not another gal pal.

Good Luck

[view]

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
eXTReMe Tracker