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Hi! I will answer any of your questions or problems, big or small and in complete confidence. I have had a lot of success in helping people in the past and hope I can help you too! Look forward to hearing from you soon!
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Last Update: June 12, 2005
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I'm not sure how to explain this. For example, I'm trying to lose weight, see. And my Aunt tells me that I've lost some weight. I don't like to hear those things from her.

At first I thought it was because I fear success. But if my wife gives me an encouraging comment like that then I take it good. I feel good. I feel encouraged. And it's like that with everyone. But from my Aunt... well, with the weight thing, it'll make me feel like eating more and gaining weight to make her wrong.

It might help if I explain a little bit more about my relationship with my Aunt. She raised me and for a long time I felt like she was my mother; even after she told me she wasn't. In the last few years though I've thought like that somewhat less. I still feel somewhat like she's my mother but not as strongly as I once did.

So what could be the problem? (link)
I think you are like this with your aunt because you don't believe her and you want to things on your own without getting advice from her or have her interfering. If my mum and boyfriend both told me I'd lost weight I would definitely believe my boyfriend and I'd feel like my mum was accusing me of something rather than being complimentary. You are not alone


hi im laura 15 female i need some advice about things/People in my school keep on makin up rumours about me like im a slag and i run away to get attention and stuff but the story gets twisted and i always hear about it from other people and people have been saying stuff about me behind my back and it really hurts and loads of people are making up rumours about me and people are starting to believe them.The thing i dont get is that i have never been nasty to anyone in my school before :( help me wat shud i do? (link)
Do you have any idea why they are spreading these rumours? Have you been with a guy lately who someone else might have fancied? I had this problem at my school and it was started by a popular girl who ended up being jealous of me because I had kissed a guy she liked (but I didn't know that) and that I had a good home life. You need to find out who is spreading and ask some of your friends to help you and stick up for you. Whoever is doing this is doing it because they are very insecure and doing this because its making them feel better.


Well I have this friend. He is really nice and I can be honest with him about almost everything. The problem is there is this one thing I'm not sure I can be honest about.He thinks my other friend (one of my bestestest friends) likes him. I asked her if she really did and she said no. I know I have to tell him so he doesn't get hurt by asking her or something but I don't know how. Any tips on how to break it to him? Should I really tell him? I'll rate high. Unless youranswer doesn't help at all. If you don't have anything to say to help please don't answer. Thank you. (link)
Well, perhaps you could tell him that she isn't looking for a boyfriend at the moment?


I got a new neighbor a few months ago, tight before school started, he's nice and sweet and loads of fun to be around. I told him i liked him a few weeks after he moved in but he said he had a gf who he loved and would never leave. so i kinda gave up, but lately we have become wicked good friends. we hang out all the time at my house or we just walk around the neighborhood. a few weeks ago he tried to kiss me while we were on my trampoline(he admited to it later) but i had a bf at that point and he was still with his girl so i just turned away and got back up. the next day he tells me that he dumped his girl. the next day i get dumped by my bf cuase he wanted to date some slut in a grade below us. so i tell him that. my neighbor and i were on my trampoline again and we are kindalike wrestling a little...and he started feeling me up then we started making out.he pushed away from me and started saying why...why...why...i was soo confused. it was my first kiss too. aparrently he had gotten back together with his gf the day before,he didn't want to cheat on her so we stopped. like 2 minutes later he is fingering me and we are making out again.when we finally stop my brother was pulling in the driveway so we separated quickly and he went home(my bro saw nothing thank goodness).i told my friend who knows everything about me and guys that he kissed me and only that he kissed me i didn't tell anyone else and she said something about it to him and he flipped at me. he didn't want anyone to know cuase then his sis would find out and she would tell his rents then his rents will tell his gf who will start cutting or something again. he stopped talking to me and then one day last week i was sick from school and the next day he asked me if everthing was okay and we started talking again. we started hanging out again. but now we include my friend a lot cuase she lives down the street and we were down at her house and we were watching a cartoon thing on her comp and she was sitting at her computer desk and i was sitting like right next to her on the piano bench and he was sitting behind me. during this cartoon thing he started tickling my side so i grapped his hand. i let it go after i moved it away and then he tickled me again so i grabbed his hand again and he laced his fingers in mine. he just plays with my head like that all the time. should i tell him to stop or no? i really like him and everything but nothing can really form with his gf still there.What do you think i should do? (link)
Ok. I really do think he likes you. When you mentioned about his girlfriend cutting, I wonder if he got back with her because she began to or hreatened to cut herself. If you really like him and want to go out with him you need to tell him to split up with his girlfriend. He needs to know that she won't be cutting herself just because of him, she will have other problems too. Make sure nothing else happens between you two until he has done this and then you can have a relationship without having to worry. If you tell him this then he will know you understand about fidelity and that he has to make the decision. If he does split up with his girlfriend then you will know how much he likes you and want s to be with you.


I was talkin to my boyfriend last night, and out of no where he said that he needed to tell me somthin in a real serious voice. I got kinda nervous since we've never realy been serious before, we're alwayse lauphing and having a good time. So he said- (remember when we first started talking and you asked me if i'm a virgin and i said yes.... well i'm not. I just said that because i didnt want it to be akward if i told you that soon. Then he said that everything else he has said to me has been true, and he felt bad that he hadnt told me before.) When he told me this i didnt know what to say.I feel really uncomfortable with it. I'm not going to do it with him, since i'm only 15 and i dont believe in that, but i dont want him to go off to some other girl when i say no. What should i do, because i really like this guy. He is one of the nicest people i have every met and i still really like him?!?!?!?!?! Please help (link)
Ok, he said this to you because he was worried that if you knew he wasn't a virgin then you would be worried about going out with him as he is more experienced than you. I was in exactly the same situation as you and I learnt that my boyfriend said this because he really liked me and said it so I wouldn't be put off. You should feel privelidged that he has told you and from the sound of things he was really nervous about telling you. He obviously cares for you a great deal and if he can admit that he lied to you then he will understand that you don't want to go further with him just yet.


I've been working at the same place for over a year and I really enjoy working there. I feel like I've established myself as a good employee. A past roommate of mine who I didn't get along with well and only see infrequently recently applied for a position at the same place I work. Apparently, she told my boss and others she spoke to that she knows me well and that I would be excited to work with her. She pretty much said that I really wanted her to work there and would recommend her. The problem is that I know this person is not a good worker. She is irresponsible about coming to work and tends to slack off when she does come. She's not very respectful to employers either and tends to demand that they give her time off whenever she wants it. I'm concerned that this person's job performance could reflect negatively on me, since she pretty much used me as a reference without my permission. Should I approach my boss about this? What should I do if my boss asks me about her? What can I do to distance myself from this person so that her poor performance won't make me look bad? (link)
I think you should definitely speak to your boss.he problem is that if this girl does come and work with you , you will probably have to do more work because she will be slack and in the end it won't give you a very good name. If you talk to your oss they will really appreciate your honesty and glad of the fact you can be truthful to them. It is an easy situation as if she has an interview and is turned down, it is in fact the boss's decision who to employ and not yours. Don't worry it will all work out !


My friend has this bf that I hooked her up with.Me and him are cool ever sence they met and I liked him I still do but not as much.Well the other day she ad a dream about us to mking out and going behind her back.I would never do that but does that dream mean something. (link)
You usally have dreams which include something you have seen or thought about even for a second that day. Quite a few people have dreams about his but it is just their insecurities getting in the way. You need to hint at her that you are not remotely interested in her boyfriend. If she mentions the dream agin just laugh and be light-hearted about it and she will realised she is being paranoid. Perhaps when you next see her you could say something really unsubtle like you really go for guys with dark hair (when her boyfriend is blond). Talk about characteristics you like in a guy which are the total opposite to what her boyfriend is like. Dreams will affect people for a bit but her insecurities will go away very soon I promise


okay ... i had a crush on this guy , and would always flirt and stuff , but after he started liking me , i stopped liking him .It's kinda like now i completely dislike him , i hate his confused look , i hate the way he tries to make me laugh ... i just don't like him !! Why is this happening to me ? (link)
Well the prblem is , is that youve stopped fancying him but he still thinks you do and is trying to impress you. Next time you see him maybe drop in a hint that you love being single and see how he changes.


I love my boyfriend very much, and he is just the sweetest thing to me. I wouldn't trade him for anybody else. My parents don't think he's a good influence on me, and want us to break up. If he doesn't change soon they'll keep us from seing each other and talking.
He's 2 years older than me, in high school when I'm still just a middle schooler. I met him through my younger brother's theatre group, he is a wonderful actor and an even better singer. I knew who he was for almost a year, but never talked to him since he was older, and I wasn't even in the play. some time in september he noticed me at the theatre group. We began talking on the computer and on the phone for several weeks until he asked me out. my parents had been sorta skepetical about the whole thing with an older guy from the begining, but let me go out with him anyway.
There have been a few times that I couldn't do or go places with him because he was older, or because my parents didn't think I was ready to do things. He takes things rather personally and got really upset with them, being extremely rude about them in his online diary. Later, after the problems had been solved, my dad found the website, nad was really disappointed in what he saw. That was about 3 weeks ago. My parents have never let go of the fact that he and I made out in front of my little bro, something both of us will never do again. They also like to rub in my face that he is very emmotional, and materilistic and they point out all his bad traits. They fail to mention how sweet he is to me, how well we get along, how he calls me every day no matter what, and comes to watch me ride horses when any other guy would be bored to death.
Last friday one of our friends told him that I was cheating on him with my ex. Which so didn't and will never happen. I told him so on saturday, and he believed me until he talked to her again, and on sunday he was mad at me. I felt so bad, being accused of something that he knows that as a person, I would never do that. Anyways, he hugs all his friends that are girls. I told my mom, and she almost had be convienced to break up with him.
Yesterday, I was talking to him on the phone, and I told him he needed to be more respectful to my parents. He replied with "I dont give a what your parents think" I then told him that why my mom was letting me use the phone before I was finished with homeworkd and chores was because I was supposed to break up with him, but that I didn't want to. He got all upset and got off the phone.
I dont know what to do, I want him to be able to get along with my parents, and I want them to see all the good things I see in him. How should I let him know that my parents thnk he is a bad influence, emotional, rude in his diary ect. ect. without making it sound like thats how I feel, and that they still like him well enough as a person. I agree with a few of the things they say, and I want him to know and to fix those things, but I dont want to sound rude, or demanding. Sorry about the question being so long, thanks so much if you can help me! (link)
Ok, he obviously really like you and there are a few things you have to sort out. First of all you have to confront the girl who is spreading rumours about you. Go with a girlfriend if that makes it easier. Ask her why she is doing it and if she has a nice bone in her body then she will leave you and him alone. Tell her she isn't getting a good name for herself by spreading lies. Secondly you definitely shouldn't have made out in front of your brother! Your parents are very protective over their children especially daughters and their boyfriends. I think they are worried that because he is older than you then he will want to take things further even though you are younger. You need to tell your parents that you can't help who you want to be with and that they have to support you otherwise they are just going to push you away. Perhaps invite him round for dinner at our place with your parents there. Get him to dress smartly and perhaps bring them a bottle of wine and, if acts on his best behaviour then they will most likely think he is a responsible guy and will look after you instead of someone who wants to make out all the time etc... Once they see this they will let their guard down and understand how much you mean to eachother. Make sure you aren't too close in front of your parents tho like kissing on the lips or holding hands. You have to wait til yourparents have calmed down before they will accept that. They are worried because you are their daughter and you are young and perhaps the first boyfriend you have had or that they know about? My parents were the same and it all worked out in the end!


ok there's this boy i like but i don't know what to tell him i'm only a 13 tear old girl wh's really cofussed i don't know if he likes me. How do i find out if he likes me back? My best friend asked him out for me but he said no but now me and him are becoming really really good friends an i don't want to ruein our friendship. what sould i do? (link)
If your friend asked him out for you then you obviously didn't know each other very well then. But now he is getting to know you more and you are friends he must like you if he likes being around you andknows you like him. He probably wants to get to know you better before he asks you out. There is nothing more awkward than a couple who agree to go out with one another but hardly know eachother at all. If you ask me, he does fancy you but just wants to get to know you first.


Okay, me and my boyfriend have been going out for 3 weeks. We have gone out for the same amount of time before, and I was the one that broke it off. I didn't feel it was right to go out with him when I just wanted to be friends. Well now, I am not happy in our relationship... AGAIN. He is not supportive at all, and I am the kind of girl that likes the single life. I don't like spending time with him, and I don't feel like there is butterflies in my stomach at all when I see him. But I will feel bad for breaking up with him AGAIN, and everybody will be mad at me and call me a whore. Should I break up with him anyway, or stick with him and make myself happy?

(link)
Don't do this to yourself and think you can make yourself happy if youre not happy with the situation you are in. You are young and if he doesn't make you happy then you shouldn't go out with him. There is obviously no chemistry betwenn you and him on your side and the longer you last in the relationship the more upset you will become. No body will call you a whore and the best thing to do would be to talk to a friend about it and say you feel guilty about being with him as you don't think you can make him happy and that you see him as more of a friend than a boyfriend. I'm sure she will understand and if anyone tries to be mean to you then she will stick up for you. Don't worry


his name is ryan and i have a little thing for him. he has a huge thing for me & he's really truly a nice guy & smart. but i'm scared that if i finally do say yes to him... (he's been asking me out for a while now) that it wont be as great as my last relationship.i'm scared that me & him won't have much to talk about and then i'm just gonna have a hard time breaking up with him..and i dont wanna end up in a mess like that all over again!...and plus i still have a thing for my ex who obviously still has a thing for me...but i dont think me & him will be hooking up anytime soon since he has a girlfirend & he thinks i dont care about him anymore... (link)
You really have to think about who you really want to be with. Do you think you want to go out with ryan just because he fancies you and your ex has a new girlfriend? Don't go out with him if you are not sure but spend more time with him and work out if it is him you really want. He obviously really likes you and therefore will be prepared to wait if you tell him that you aren't ready.All relationships are different and get be great in different ways. If you do end up going out with Ryan it must be for the right reasons. If you want to get back with your ex perhaps you should let him know how you feel in private but say you dont want to get in the way of him in his girlfriend if he now doesn't feel the same way. Many men o out with someone on the rebound as it helps them get over you faster.


my boyfriend is always pressuring me to have sex. i'm not a virgin, which i told him, but i dont think i am ready to have sex with him. i mean we have been going out for 4 months, but i really dont think i am ready for that kind of commitment. the last and first guy i had sex with was my first love we had known each other since we were 3. me and him are still friends and my boyfriend always gets jealous of me talkin to him. he also cussed me out various times in person and on the phone. i really dont know what to do about this and i KNOW i cant ask my mom cuz she would go and cuss him out. 17/f/ga (link)
If you are not ready to have sex then DON'T!! The last thing you should do is go ahead with something that you are not ready for. You will only feel used afterwards and regret your decision. If your boyfriend is pushing you to have sex then you need to explain to him why you are not ready, otherwise he will just think you don't fancy him or that you still have feelings with your ex. If he understands, then that's great, but if he doesn't and continues to pressurise you then maybe you should reconsider your relationship because if he pressurises you into having sex and you do, he might think he can pressurise you into other things.


i have one friend that seems to be mad at me and my other friend and we have asked her if she is mad at us and she says no. My friend and i dont know what to do. We really want to be friends with her but i just dont know what to do (link)
Ok, is there any reason at all why you think she might be mad at you and your friend? If not you really need to confront her individually. If you do it together then it will seem a bit threatening. You need to say to her that if she is your friend then you would expect her to tell you what is wrong. You are upset that she is not telling you her problems and if she continues being like this then keep your distance from her. She will soon realise that she should tell you her problems and reallise how much you both mean to her.


How do i move on? i broke up with my boyfriend because i was pissssed off at him cuz i found out shit about him that he didnt tell me himself. He was trying to get back with me but i didnt want to even though i still have feelings for him. Now we dont talk and i want him back!!! but i cant, so how do i move on? what are things that i can do to heal my broken heart? (link)
Hi there. People always say that the time it takes to mend a broken heart is half the amount of time you went out with him for. But I don't know how long you went out with him for! If you still like him and think you want to get back with him then you have to think about the fact that if he has kept things from you before then he might well do again. You need to start talking to him again cos the main reason you aren't talking is because you said know when he tried to get back with you again. When this happens, guys will always block you out and not want to talk toyou because that's their way of dealing with getting over you. Could you start by emailing or texting him if you find it too difficult talking face to face? If you do talk face to face don't do it if he is with his mates because he will be acting up in front of them. If you really do want to get back with him then you have to try hard at becoming friends with him first, getting the trust back and telling him that in a relationship you have to be honest with one another. If you don't want to get back with him the best thing to do is go out with your mates and spend time with them going to the cinema or other things that will take your mind off him and your feelings. I have been in your situation and it is tough to begin with but every day gets a little bit better I promise.


im a 13f and i just got my first thong. is it slutty to have one at my age? ill rate! thanx (link)
Nope, not if it doesn't show! you'll be fine. And if you tell people about it then only tell the people who you know won't spread it around. Anything's better than a VPL!!


I know there is something messed up in my head because i get angery, sad, and happy really quickly and when i am mad, i throw things. i hate the way i act and i have been trying to change, but nothing has been working. ive told my mom and sister this and they really havent done anything to help me. what should i do? (link)
How old are you? A lot of mood swings are to do with your hormones-go see a doctor if you want?


I am 14 and I'm in the 8th grade and my best friend in 13 and in the 7th and one of her friends are like always hanging around her and I can stand her friend shes loud and annoying and I tell her to calm down and all but she wont and whe nmy friend in around her friend she acts stupid like her and all and I cant stop hanging out with my friend so like what should I do (link)
I think the friend of your friend is jealous of you because youre older and probably cooler. The things she is doing show she is trying to be the centre of attention and try and make your friend like her more - which won't happen. I bet you're not the only one who thinks she is annoying. you are obviously a better friend to her if you can be normal and yourself around her and not have to act stupid. Your friend will realise this very soon - don't worry!


well me and steve are "together" i guess and he has been grounded for a few weeks so we are hangin out on friday , we really like eachother and i heard he might ask me out next time we hangout so i dont know... i want something fun to do we were going to go out with our friends who are together, i but i dont know if we`re all going together but we probably will. we were going to go to the movies then go to his house but he doesnt really want to go to his house. any ideasss? thankss oh yea we are all 15 and 16 (just if anyone wanted to know) (link)
Bowling?


my hamster is 2 years old and i feed her salad every 3rd or 4th day, i noticed yesterday that she has a small bald spot on her back, it seems as if shes losing fur. whats happening to her? (link)
She might have fleas or a skin problem and is scratching that part of her back and is losing fur. Just take her to the vet and they can sort it out. It's nothing serious, don't worry.




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