about

First off that's my special man friend with me way back from high school, and been dating now for almost four years now. Yeah he's pretty spectacular, and I love him to pieces, and that's all I have to say about that. I'm a full time college student and working on my gen ed, but I would like to get my bachelor's in gerontology and eventually get my nursing license. In fact I work at a nursing home now as a CNA and I love it so much. Anyways ask questions if you want. I'll try to help you out anyway I can. I love helping people after all. :)

advice

ok i'm 17/f and a virgin.
but every time my boyfriend comes over or i'm around him for long periods of time, it feels like my vagina sweats. and my underwear is wet when i go to the bathroom to check and see if my period came early or something. sometimes there's tons of clear discharge too. is this normal? it's always worse right after we've made out a whole lot, like i got kinda turned on or something. what causes this and is this normal for girls?
thanks!

Only on Mars.

xoxo,
dottie4

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my boyfriend is having all four of his wisdom teeth out thursday. i'm going to stop by his house and see him. i want to take him a small present as a surprise. he brought me my favorite flowers when i had my surgery because he was going out of town the next day. i'm going out of town the night after i drop by his house, so it's a similar situation. does anybody have any ideas? i'm thinking maybe some of his favorite ice cream? or something cute/romantic? he's what you might call an "old fashioned romanic" if that helps. i just want to show him i love him. :) thanks!

Just leave him alone for a couple days after he gets his wisdoms pulled. He won't be up for anything because he'll be in too much pain. He'll probably be on too many pain killers anyway to even realize your there. He'll probably be asleep. When he starts feeling better in a couple of days then visit him. Until then just leave him alone. Sorry to be blunt, but that's the way it goes.

xoxo,
dottie4

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well,
im 13/F
how do you tell when youve gotten your first period?

You'll bleed. Your first period is usually really light so just have sanitary napkins ready for if it starts. Usually schools nurses will have them avaliable if you don't.

xoxo,
dottie4

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How do you put on a condom?

It's pretty self explanatory. There's usually directions on the box.

http://justfuckinggoogleit.com/

xoxo,
dottie4

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Hey!
So yesterday i randomly friend requested this guy who is friends with my guy friend because i thought he was really cute lol and he seemed familiar. turns out we know eachother through some people and I have met him like once (but i dont really remember haha)
anyways we talked over messaging for like 2 hours and he seems really cool. I know this is a stretch but i maybe want to possibly go to prom with him or see if something happens (i know this probablly wont happen im not getting my hopes up) but i dont know if i should message him again tonight or wait? or how i should approach this?

I think it would be a good idea to get his number first. Then actually talk to him on the phone and ask him if he wants to hang out with you and some of your friends. After you get to know him a little better, ask him then. I wouldn't just ask him right out of the blue because then I can almost gurantee you he will say no because he barely knows you.

xoxo,
dottie4

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so last night my bf for over 2 and a half years dumped me because he says he doesnt know what he wants and that hes not happy. and that he wants his old life back before he met me. He also told me him and his ex are good friends now and that he was hiding it from me. I've been crying ever since and have this feeling in my stomach that wont go away. I guess its what a broken heart feels like. He broke up with me on the phone but told me he wanted to wait until this weekend but i told him no. I really need some advice and help to how i can get over him faster and be happy again. Oh and if this feeling is a broken heart.

That's a really long time to date a guy. Honestly you are way better off without him. This guy sounds like a total wuss. He couldn't even tell you all this in person. Plus he's a liar. If my boyfriend didn't tell me he was hanging out with his ex I would dump him right off. I know it hurts right now but soon you will realize how much better you are without him. Just hang out with your friends more often and maybe get a new hobby. Anything to get your mind off this jack-off.

xoxo,
dottie4

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when having anal sex does the guy get feces on his penis?
and what happens? like i dont get it. haha

Like you have to make sure you poop first and then wipe your but really good. It will more smell like feces then anything else.

xoxo,
dottie4

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When guys get into high school, are they all perverts? Do they change or what?

Not all guys are pervs. You just have to find the right one. As you get older there are less guys that are pervs.

xoxo,
dottie4

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how do you talk dirty. i know thats a dumb question but this guy keeps on telling me to and hes getting mad and calling me stupid since i said, what would you like me to say. he was like your so stupid just talk dirty
now i feel stupid.

Just don't brush your teeth and say whatever you want you dirty, dirty girl.

xoxo,
dottie4

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what is your take on strippers do you think their trashy or do you have any level of respect for them?

I have respect for them for the fact they are practicing Darwin's Theory of Survival of the Fittest. Basically your doing anything you can to live and provide food for yourself.

xoxo,
dottie4

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13/F
I have stretch marks (badly) on my boobs. Whats up with that?

That is really common. Your going through puberty so your skin stretches to make room for new woman parts. Most women have them. If your really self concious of them just use some cocoa butter on them. It's not that big of a deal though.

xoxo,
dottie4

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Soo I'm pretty sure I was a couple days if not a week or so late for my period. When i finaly got it it only lasted not even two days. Is this a problem or should I just not be worried?

Your probably fine but I would take a pregnancy test to be on the safe side. You can get one for $5.00 at Walmart or any drug store. The only difference between the more expensive one and the cheap one is that it detects a pregnancy before your missed period. However you already said it lasted a few days so you can get the cheap one.

xoxo,
dottie4

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alright so my friend Melinda is kind of prude i mean she has hooked up with one guy almost one year ago. we are sophomores now. but she does socialize and flirt. i recently found out that she has been talking to this freshman in college, James, that she has known for over a year. they honestly talk everyday about everything, the problem is, he has a girlfriend. Melinda and James dont discuss anything about being together- but i found it a little shady that yesterday James and his gf were in his room and the gf was on his bed and that Melinda and him were videochatting but he couldnt say anything to her so the girlfriend wouldnt hear. he had earphones in so he could listen to Melinda. anyways i feel like he likes her- he asks her to hang out and stuff and she is always always talking to him. what should she do? i know she likes James, but doesnt want to bc she doesnt want to be the other girl

Well I don't think that you should be getting involved in your friend's business. It sounds like she's just wanting to start trouble where it doesn't need to be started. I think that you should just stay out of it by all means possible.

xoxo,
dottie4

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ok im not going to sugar coat this or anything im just gonna straight up tell you how it is. i need to get something off my chest and i want to hear what you have to say about it. im putting myself out there so, try not to be too harsh :/ i really appreciate you taking the time to read this and help me out.

16/f
been going out with my bf for 1 year and 6 months. let me just tell you for sure we definitely are in love, no questions asked. we go to different schools but only live 15 minutes away from each other and we make it work. even though i truly do love him, i have mildly [nothing horrible] cheated on him on several occasions.

okay, back last year when we were going out for about 4 or 5 months, i started to talk to this guy, G. he was blatantly flirty with me all the time and i guess sweet talked me into a situation i did not want to be in. one day in school he texted me saying to 'go to the bathroom' and meet him outside in the hall. so i did, and we were just walking around the school talking. we sorta got slower at the staircase and he turned around and kissed me. i kissed him back but it was just 2 short pecks held out for 2 seconds each id say. it felt like the WEIRDEST THING ever, i didnt like it. but it was almost like he had me brainwashed because i kept talking to the guy. over a break like the easter break or something when no one was home he snuck over to my house and i let him in... i kept him in my room because my brother was home and if he saw some guy in our house he would get me in trouble. so he almost forcefully laid me down and started kissing me. no tongue or anything, just kissing, like long pecks i suppose? so i felt sort of violated because i was very hesitant and it made me feel uncomfortable. right after i got up and didnt let him push me down anymore and told him he had to leave and i made him leave my house. i only told my boyfriend about the kiss in the hallway and i twisted the story and said that the guy kissed me but i did not kiss him back. eventually i realized talking to this kid got me nowhere but into trouble so i ended all contacts with him. so that was over. my boyfriend was upset of course but forgave me because he still doesnt even know the whole story.

next incident came in the summer, we were going out for 8 months. i went on vacation with my family to the bahamas at a resort. i made out with/kissed 3 boys within the vacation. nothing was passionate it was just regular kisses. out of curiosity i suppose? spur of the moment? the feeling of carelessness that the summer gives you? i was on vacation and i would never have to see these people again? im not sure why i did it but these reasons seem logical. right after every time i told the boys that i had a boyfriend and that i felt horrible that i did that. the first guy, B, it was his last night. we were walking on the beach at night after a teen activity that the resort had, and it was my first night there so i was naive. he said that he had never slow danced on the beach before and he asked me to. i thought it was the sweetest thing ever so i did as we listened to a song on his ipod. he kissed me 2 or 3 times that night, nothing passionate, just kisses. and he was really shy and inexperienced and would ask me if i was bad and stuff. i told him i had a bf and we both felt really bad and he understood because he had been cheated on before. the next guy was a total jerk, i was going back to the hotel room to get ready for dinner and before that i was with a group of my friends. he said he would walk me back and i thought that he was just being a gentleman, the naive person i am. little did i know he had other intentions. when we got to my door he leaned in fast and kissed me and grabbed my ass. i was insulted by this so i pulled away after a second once i realized what was happening. then i left him and went into my room. he later told my friends from the resort that he made out with me 3 times and that i let him grab my ass a lot, which was obviously a lie. the next time was with a boy, N. my group of friends was in the poolside hot tub one night. he put his hand on my leg and eventually i sat on his lap playfully because we were all friendly like that i didnt see harm in it at the time, but now i realize that is completely leading on. my friends ditched us thinking we wanted to hookup. once they left we started making out, i did think he was attractive but his personality was a jerk and he just wanted to get with girls, but anyway, after 7 seconds or so he started to go into my pants [ i was wearing full tank top and jeans bc i got pushed into the pool with my clothes on before] and i stopped him right there. i realized then that it was wrong and definetly did not want to go any farther. we met back up with my friends. later on a friend told me that he had said that 'he wanted to f*** me before i left" and that insulted me. it made me realize he wasnt a good guy. so then i went home. i told my boyfriend i didnt do anything and that one guy B tried to kiss me but didnt and lied about it and the last guy tried to get in my pants but i didnt let him. thats all i told him, basically a half lie. still bad i know.

the last incident occured around christmas time, we were going out for 1 year and 2 months. this time i didnt do anything physically, but emotionally. my bf and i were fighting a lot, had a rough patch if you will. i just felt unhappy a lot of the time so i turned to another boy. we had just met and just started talking through insignificant means, like facebook, IM, and texting. he started to tell me that he liked me and would also sweet talk me as the first guy did. it sort of persuaded me into liking him. i did find him attractive and i did like his personality. but i learned from the past mistakes and knew i would not kiss him. we wanted to hangout one time to get to know each other, as friends of course, even though we had little crushes on each other, but he respected that i had a bf and didnt want to mess it up'. i felt my bf couldnt know about it because he would feel jealous or start worrying, couldnt blame him though. so it was originally set up that we would hangout at the mall with other people. he would bring some friends and i would bring some. i was supposed to bring my friend jenny but at the last minute she couldnt go so it was just me. he had 2 of his friends with him, and we saw other friends while we were there too so it wasnt any sort of a date. my bf thought i was just at the mall with jenny though, bc that was the original plan. but thats all he knew. anyway, this guy and i never kissed or did anything innappropriate. i did later admit to my boyfriend that this kid and i were talking and that i had developed a crush on him. my bf and i had a long talk and i eventually ended contacts with this kid and stopped liking him, and things between me and my bf got better. i am completely over that guy. but i can tell my bf is still hurt that i could like another guy so easily and he probably feels insecure, which is understandable, i would too.

so there it is. he really only knows half or even 1/3 of all of that. i have a terrible conscience inside that reminds me of this stuff constantly. i was in denial with my self for a while and would refuse to think that i did any of that stuff, i just couldnt deal with it, i was so upset with myself and still am. i know i should tell him one day... sooner is probably better. but i am SO scared. he told me a few times that if i ever cheat on me he would be so devastated and heartbroken and it would show that 'i never loved him'. but that is not true at all. i KNOW i love him with all my heart, i dont know what i would do if he broke up with me, i would be so incredibly upset. i dont want to lose him but i know that what i did was very wrong and i am truly sorry for it. it was a mistake and i meant nothing by it, i never loved anyone at any point in my life but my bf. i used to be so naive and curious and just stupid and i see that now, ...i know i will never do those things again. i am just so afraid that if i tell him everything that he will just start thinking... and it will end up with us breaking up or something to that horrible effect. i really need advice on this. thanks so much for your time.

Okay here's what your going to have to do. If you want the feeling of guilt to go away, your going to have to tell him. Honestly it doesn't really seem like you love him because people that are "in love" don't do that type of thing. You may think that you do because of the fact you've been with him for so long but it sounds like you don't. Especially since it was more then once. I don't know why somebody would take somebody back after they cheated on them. It just doesn't make sense to me. Even if he does want to stay with you, I hope you have the decency to break it off completely because you'll probably end up doing it again.

xoxo,
dottie4

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I've been really depressed lately, because I have less friends than I did last year, and I feel really ugly/
my family is broke, so I cant afford and clothes that are cute, and every one tells me Im bad at dressinggg :( cause my only clothes are from the beginning of the year.

And I just feel really REALLY ugly and everything! I need help :( Im so depressed about how I look, and my teeth, and hair, and makeup and clothes (mostly)

Sweetie your beautiful just the way you are and I'm not just saying that. My family is poor to and I really don't have a lot of friends. Friendships come and go, but your true friends will stick by you regardless of what kind of clothes you wear, what kind of makeup you wear, and even what your hair looks like. I have only one real friend who has stuck with me through everything and will always be there for me. If you don't have that now, you will eventually. For advice I'd just say be clean and presentable. And of course be nice. Friendships will come along the way. Besides, do you really want to be friends with somebody just based on the fact of how superficial they are?

xoxo,
dottie4

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noo, i was just talking back to youu :]

Oh okay.

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Now someone that agrees with me :]

Is this supposed to be feedback to the last question I answered?

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I was just wondering why people ask questions about their boyfriends and other innapropriate things that no one needs to be talking about. Doesn't anyone agree with me?

I agree but only to a certain extent. A lot of people on here I think just want to be idiots and ask questions they already know the answer to. If they honestly don't know the answer, I think it's okay to ask. Also a lot of questions people ask on here can be googled. That does annoy me when people ask questions that can be googled...

xoxo,
dottie4

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Me and my boyfriend have been dating for a while, and we've had oral a lot, but when it comes to full on sex, it just wont go in. =| i dont know why! im pretty sure im too tight, but what should i do, we have condoms and everything, but it just wont go in.. i donno, maybe we arent trying hard enough, but we are usually just in the mood, and really want to, but it wont work?! (yes i realize this is pretty embrassing, but i really dont care, i dont get awkward, or embrassed)

You have 1 of 3 options...
1)shove it in and get over the pain
2)stretch yourself out ;)
3)sleep with smaller guys
and odviously since the last is out of the question you have 2 options...
xoxo,
dottie4

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OK ive had sex 8 times so far (with 1 man) and i dnt think i have cummed yet or maybe i did but i just dont know ? Any ideas why?

There in lies the problem... the man

xoxo,
dottie4

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